Ch. 10: Where There's Smoke
Vic could only stare at him like he had lost his mind. Walt stepped in closer to her, crowding her in a manner that was unlike him. Even in her somewhat inebriated state, she recognized it as a tried and true way of getting information from suspects. Intimidation. But, it wasn't a tactic he used with her.
Ever.
"What?"
She pushed the word out. He didn't appear to recognize her confusion. He was mad. Madder than Vic had seen him in quite some time. It was both disconcerting and relieving all at once. His lack of emotion since the fire disturbed her. While anger might not be the one she preferred, at least he was showing some kind of feeling. At least he was expressing something in her direction other than disconnect and neutrality.
"What were you thinking?"
He inched closer, but Vic held her ground.
"I was thinking that I would like to forget about all of this shit for just a little while."
"By getting drunk?"
Surely, he wasn't getting self-righteous over that particular detail. God knows, he wasn't innocent of using alcohol to cope. Which was exactly her next point.
"Like you've never done it."
Her verbal jab seemed to have no real effect on him. Both of his hands came up and closed around her upper arms, not tight, but there all the same.
"Do you have any idea what could've happened?"
Vic held his eyes and pulled at her arms.
"Let go of me."
Walt dropped his hands from her, but remained in her space. Vic swallowed, her eyes flickering over his face, still not understanding why he was so angry with her over this.
"What…are you so pissed about?"
The anger that had flashed to life inside of her in response to his own seemed to ebb suddenly, leaving her feeling tired and drained. The question came out sounding just like that. Tired.
"You…you made yourself vulnerable."
Vic squinted at him like she was trying to see something that she couldn't quite make out.
"What…"
Now, that her own anger had subsided, she could see him more clearly. He was angry. But, there was a paleness to his features. He shook his head at her and whatever she intended to say, faltered, never passing her lips. All she could do was say his name.
"Walt?"
He looked down before raising his eyes to hers. He reached out and placed his hands on her shoulders, guiding him to her. His head tipped in until it rested against hers.
"I…I…you scared me."
The anger in his voice was gone, leaving a tone she didn't quite recognize.
"Scared you."
She repeated his words and he nodded, their heads still touching. Taking a deep breath, his hands fell away from her and he stepped back.
"Yeah. You scared me. I didn't know where you were."
Vic sat down on the bed and looked up at him.
"I went to the Red Pony."
Walt gave his head a shake like he was trying to clear his mind. He sat beside her on the bed.
"You…anything could've happened. Especially with you drunk."
"I'm not that drunk, Walt."
He breathed out a sigh.
"Still…we don't know where Cain is. No one has seen him since the fire. He could have…you could have…"
His voice failed him and she could hear the emotion that replaced his anger. It was raw. Incredibly raw. Fear. Something Walt didn't express very often. Almost never. An emotion he never handled well.
"Nothing happened."
Her words came out soft. Walt turned to her.
"But, it could have. He could be watching. He could have followed you. Hurt you."
Suddenly, everything came into focus. His anger was misplaced. It wasn't what he really felt. He was afraid. Walt hated admitting that he was afraid. A wave of guilt washed over her.
"He didn't. I'm fine."
Walt cast his face down. He was taking deep breaths now.
"All this because I wouldn't…have sex with you?"
Vic reached up and cradled her head in her hands.
"No…Walt. This…isn't about sex. It's…you've…"
Now she felt frustrated. The gauntlet of emotions they seemed to be running through was making it difficult for her to hone in on what she was really feeling. What she really wanted to say to him. Vic sighed deeply. Lifting her head from her hands, she found him watching her.
"We should…we should just go to sleep."
Walt's expression made it clear he disagreed.
"We need to talk. There's clearly a problem here."
Vic nodded. At least he made some sense now.
"Yeah, there is. But…I can't do this right now. We'll…just fight…and say something stupid. Tomorrow. We can talk tomorrow."
Walt looked unsure.
"Vic…"
She shook him off and stood up.
"I'm gonna change and go lay on the couch."
He rose.
"The couch?"
Vic started to undress slowly, her headache full blown.
"Yeah. I think…we both need some space."
Walt stood by while she changed and grabbed her pillow from the bed. She held it with both hands and paused at the bedroom door.
"Get some sleep. We'll…talk in the morning."
Without waiting for an answer, Vic left him standing beside the bed.
xxx
Vic woke up with her head still thumping in pain. Being on the couch in an awkward position didn't help her predicament. Sitting up, she scrubbed at her eyes with her hands. Dropping her hands, she looked around the quiet living room. The entire house seemed quiet, but it was light out. Vic stood up and stretched her arms up over her head. She walked groggily into the kitchen, her head reminding her why she shouldn't drink that much. A glance out the window told her that Cady was already gone. There's no way she wouldn't have noticed Vic on the couch. That would be an entire conversation for later. Of course, there was a good chance, she heard them the previous night.
Vic sighed as she fumbled with the coffee pot. While it gurgled to life, she leaned on the counter and let her head fall forward until her chin rested on her chest. The smell of coffee began to fill the kitchen. Vic looked in the direction of the guest bedroom. She was dreading the talk she and Walt needed to have. The thought of it spiraling into yet another argument weighed on her. God knows, she spent enough years of her marriage fighting. In contrast, she and Walt didn't fight much. They argued, but rarely had real fights. Where her temper was quick, Walt exercised more patience and calmness unless it was a serious matter. In that way, he offset her and it kept most disagreements between them from reaching a real boiling point.
She opened the cabinet and pulled out one cup, before reaching up and grabbing another one. Checking the coffee, she found it done and poured two cups. She stirred cream and sugar into her own before grabbing both mugs and making her way to the bedroom. Juggling carefully, Vic managed to get the door open.
When she stepped in, she found Walt up and dressing. He looked her way, his face full of questions and trepidation. She wordlessly offered him the mug in her left hand. He took it with a tight smile.
"Thanks."
Vic took a sip from her own cup as he drank some of his and set it down. Vic walked over and sat on the bed while he finished dressing, threading his belt through the loops on his jeans. Vic looked up at him, setting her cup on the bedside table.
"I'm sorry. That I scared you."
There. It was out of the way. Walt nodded, not making eye contact. He seemed detached all over again.
"Sure."
Vic sighed.
"Don't…do that."
He met her eyes.
"Don't do what?"
His tone was flat this morning. It wasn't an encouraging sign.
"Don't be…like that. It's an apology. You either accept it or you don't. Don't just say sure and act like you don't care."
"Okay. I…appreciate your apology. That better?"
Vic rolled her eyes and stood up.
"Jesus. Forget it."
She started to leave the room, but Walt caught her by the arm.
"Vic, don't."
She pulled her arm free and turned to him.
"Don't what, Walt? I'm trying. I really am. But you're…you're…being a…difficult.."
"I'm not the one who walked out last night. Twice. And you tried again just now."
She drew her face back a bit.
"Walked out? I didn't…walk out. Either time. We weren't even talking when I left last night. We were in bed. Not talking. Not doing anything."
"You told me last night this wasn't about sex."
Vic took a deep breath.
"It's not. That's just a…a…symptom of a larger problem."
"Okay. What problem?"
Vic reached up and rubbed her temples.
"You know what? If you're gonna do this thing where you act like you have no idea what's happening, go ahead and let me know so that I don't waste my time. God, I hate it when you do that. It's…annoying."
His expression stayed the same.
"I don't seem to be able to make you happy no matter what I do."
The comment struck her. As did the defeat she could hear in his words. Vic closed her eyes and then opened them back up. She inhaled deeply and then let the breath out slowly. What they really needed was a reset button.
"Let…let's…Walt, I am sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. Or worry you."
She could see him considering her words before he answered.
"I know."
It was only two words, but it felt like a modicum of progress. An acknowledgement if nothing else. Vic reached out and took his hand, pulling him towards the bed.
"Sit with me."
For a second, she thought he would resist. But, then he did as she asked. The mattress shifted under their weight.
"I…I'm also sorry that I haven't been more patient with you. But…it feels like…you aren't really trying."
"Trying to what?"
Vic shrugged.
"Anything really. You've been so shut down these last couple of days. And…I get it. I do. But…at some point…you gotta snap out of this funk you're in. Walt…things can't go on like this. I can't. We can't."
Walt looked her way, his eyes finding hers.
"So, you want me to what? Get over it?"
Vic shook her head.
"No, that's not what I'm saying. I know what you've lost. Believe me. I do. But…I lost something, too. And…it might not be as big as what you lost…but…it feels like you're minimizing me in all this."
She paused. Walt waited.
"You are so wrapped up in your own grief that you don't seem to see that other people are hurting too. That's…not an accusation. Again, I get it. But…I lost something important to me, too. Not just a place to live, Walt. But…the place you took me after I got shot. The place where you helped me heal. The first place that we…were together. Building a life."
Her voice broke slightly but she pressed on.
"And…maybe it's not as immense as what you feel…felt for your wife. I get the connection with the cabin. I know how deep that love runs in you. And I've always told you that it was okay. And…it is. But…right now…I am the one who is here. And…we are the ones who are dealing with this. And I…I need you. But it feels…like the feeling isn't mutual."
He was looking at her with an expression that easily could have split her in half.
"A lot has happened."
The comment prickled her.
"Yeah, Walt, I'm aware of that."
He ran his palm over the denim of his jeans.
"I don't mean to hurt you."
The words came from him slow and measured. Vic waited, knowing he wasn't done.
"But…I don't even know how I feel."
Vic frowned.
"What does that even mean?
Her frustration was evident. Walt's eyes dropped to where his hands rested on his legs.
"I need time. I…don't know what else to say."
Vic swallowed.
"Time? For what?"
"To think about some things."
Vic sighed.
"What things?"
He fell quiet again. Vic licked her lips.
"Walt…"
Her cell phone buzzed interrupting her words. Vic glanced at it.
"Shit."
Reaching over and grabbing the phone, she looked at the screen. As she answered it, she mouthed the word "Cady." He nodded and watched her with intense eyes. Vic stood up and paced the room as she talked. The conversation was brief. Ending the call, Vic tossed the phone on the bed.
"She wants to see us."
Vic started to pull out clean clothes as Walt stood up from the bed, his expression unreadable again. By the time, Vic was dressed, he had both of their coats and passed Vic hers wordlessly. She took it and pulled it on, following him out the door.
xxx
The ride over was quiet. Too quiet. Quiet and uncomfortable. Vic looked out the window at the snow covered landscape as Walt drove the Bronco towards the station. She turned her head twice and looked at him. Both times he kept his eyes on the road ahead of him. Letting her eyes drift away, she returned her gaze to the window, wishing the ride was already over and wishing whatever was on his mind would just come out. The tension was starting to push every button she had. She hated the way it felt. It made her want to go somewhere away from him and just curl up until the world felt right again.
Cady was clearly waiting for them when they walked into her office. There was something unreadable on her face as they took seats opposite her desk, neither of them talking outside of ordinary greetings.
"Morning, everything okay?"
Walt nodded.
"Fine."
Cady shifted her eyes to Vic.
"Really?"
Walt butted in.
"Cady, the case?"
She looked at Vic for a second longer before looking at her father.
"It seems that Will Cain is gone."
Walt leaned forward.
"Gone?"
"Yeah, we found out where he's been staying and they said he checked out three nights ago."
Vic's expression darkened.
"The night of the fire."
"Yeah. We've asked the uh…the state crime lab for help on the fire. How it was started."
Walt shook his head, trying to redirect the conversation.
"Did you put out a BOLO on Cain?"
"Yes, we did. But…right now, we don't have anything to actually charge him with. He's…wanted for questioning."
Walt stood up, agitation clear on his face.
"So…he's disappeared. And we're just supposed to be okay with this?"
Cady stood up.
"That's not what I said. We're looking for him. But…I think there's a good chance he's gone."
Walt shook his head.
"No. He's not. He didn't accomplish what he wanted. He's around here somewhere."
He turned to leave the office. Cady came around her desk.
"Dad! Where are you going?"
Walt turned around.
"You do your job and I'll do mine. I won't sit around here and wait for him to show up again."
With that, he left through the private door, bypassing the rest of the office and their prying eyes. Vic hesitated, her eyes waffling between Cady and the door. Cady covered the distance between them.
"Vic, you need to talk some sense into him."
Vic gave Cady a long look.
"Cady, I…don't disagree with him. I…don't know what to tell you."
"He's upset."
Vic nodded.
"Yeah, he is and he has a right to be."
Cady glanced at the closed door.
"I heard you guys fighting last night. And you were on the couch this morning. Do you want to talk about that?"
Vic shook her head.
"No…I don't."
Cady sighed.
"Vic, I'm afraid he's going to do something reckless."
Vic could hear the concern in Cady's tone and she knew it was well placed.
"Cady, I…"
Vic's voice faded out before she looked between the door and her boss again.
"…I don't know what you want me to say. You seem to think he'll listen to me. And…I don't think that's true. Not now."
Leaving the office, she made the quick trip downstairs to find Walt sitting in the Bronco staring out into space. Vic slid into the passenger seat.
"You okay?"
At first, she thought he didn't hear her. Then, he looked at her across the front seat.
"He's waiting, Vic. I know he is."
His eyes held a look she hadn't seen in a while. Vic nodded.
"Yeah, I know. Walt…Cady…"
He spoke up, cutting her off.
"I know that she's doing her job and that she's trying to follow the law. I understand that and I don't blame her. But…that is her investigation. Not ours."
Vic's brow raised at his comment.
"Our investigation?"
"Mine, then."
Vic shook her head.
'No…ours is right. I just…you know she won't approve.
Walt nodded.
"I know."
Vic bit her lip.
"It's…illegal. I could lose my job."
Walt looked at her across the Bronco. For a split second, she saw something she recognized. But he stayed quiet. Vic held his eyes.
"We…never finished our talk."
Walt looked away.
"I'm not sure it would do any good. I don't think I have the answers you want."
"What answers do you think I want? Walt, all I really want is for you to be present with me."
He shrugged. Vic sighed and looked out the window. He started the Bronco.
"We should…go somewhere…private."
"Yeah."
He pulled out and headed down the road. Vic's brow knitted together.
"Where are we going?"
Walt kept his eyes on the road in front of him.
"Somewhere private."
xxx
Vic sat on the hood of the Bronco looking out across the property and the remains of the cabin. Walt was leaned against the front bumper beside her, his head turned in her direction.
"So…what are we doing here?"
Walt looked at her for a long moment.
"I…am sorry that I shut you out."
Vic leaned forward, resting her arms on her thighs.
"I…wasn't looking for an apology, Walt. That's not…what this is about."
"Okay. What's it about?"
The same old frustration started to creep through her. He must've seen it because he spoke again before she responded.
"Sorry. I know what you want. I'm just…I'm not sure I can give you that."
"All I want is for you to tell me what is going on in your head."
He looked out across the landscape.
"I never meant to make you feel like your feelings don't matter. They do. I was shortsighted. I…there's something…"
She could see him struggling with his words. He looked at the ruins of the cabin.
"You're right. We can build a new home."
Vic eyed him.
"So, you do want to rebuild?"
Walt nodded.
"Yeah, I do. I've been thinking about it. We could rebuild on the same spot. Or…pick somewhere else if you want."
Vic turned her eyes towards the scenery that unfolded behind them. What would have been the view from the porch.
"Nowhere else. Here."
He followed her line of sight. Vic could sense that there was more on his mind. Something he wasn't saying just yet. He inhaled a breath of cold air and turned back to face her.
"There's…there something else, Vic. Another reason I brought you here."
She could hear the hesitance in his voice.
"Okay."
Walt sucked on his bottom lip as he looked for the words. She knew that was a constant struggle for him. Everyone who knew him did.
"I know you always thought of the cabin as mine. I guess it was. But…there's…I don't want you feel that way anymore. When…we build this new place…I want you to help me. I want to know what you like. What you want it to be. I want it to be yours. I want…everything that's mine to be yours. Legally."
Vic was watching him, unsure of what he was getting at.
"I don't want to worry about what happens to you if something happens to me."
Vic frowned at the comment.
"Walt…"
He pushed forward, intent on saying what he wanted to say.
"I know you don't like it when I talk about dying. But, one day it's gonna happen. For both of us. No one lives forever. Even if I left a will, there's no…"
He paused and looked at the snow covered ground. He took another deep breath and looked up into her face.
"If you were my wife, then there would be less legal issues with it."
Vic stared at him.
"Your wife?"
He shifted on his feet.
"Yeah."
She seemed more than a little confused.
"After all that last night and this morning…you're…asking me this now?"
"Yep."
Vic tilted her head like she was trying to make sense of what he was saying.
"You want to get married so I can…inherit your stuff?"
The words came out slow and cautious. Walt shook his head.
"No, I want to get married because I love you and…I want to provide for you. Ever after I'm gone. I know you've said marriage isn't important to you. And…if you really feel that way…I'll respect it. But…I…would like for you to marry me. I…I want you to be my wife. It was something I was thinking about before…the fire. But then…this happened. And now, I'm not sure where we stand."
There seemed to be a sense of relief when he pushed out the last words. Vic stared at him with wide eyes. After several seconds, a low, breathless laugh escaped her.
"This has got to be the strangest proposal ever. You are…proposing?"
Walt nodded.
"Yeah, I guess I am."
She rolled her eyes and laughed again.
"You…want…to get married out of…some sense of obligation? That's…what I'm hearing."
"That's not what this is. I'm not saying it right."
He was clearly flustered. Vic slid off the hood, her boots leaving imprints in the snow. Her hand found his and she pulled him around in front of her.
"I know what you're saying. I'm fluent in Walt. I just…you're making a legal argument here and…that's not a valid reason for us to get married. We…"
Walt broke in, cutting off her words.
"I want to marry you. I always have. This isn't just some legal proposition. Maybe I shouldn't have even brought that up. I…love you, Vic. I do. I feel like I'm…messing all of this up."
Vic looked up into his face and studied it, gauging him.
"Is this really what you want? Tell me the truth."
"I am telling you the truth."
Before she could respond, he dipped his face and he kissed her. The kiss went on until Walt finally pulled back and sucked in a sharp breath. The expression on his face was open and honest. She could see the truth of his words written there. Vic swallowed.
"Okay."
A smile tugged at the edges of his mouth.
"Okay? So…yes?"
Vic smiled at him, an intense mix of emotions circulating through her.
"Yeah."
He smiled then. A rare smile that was broad and real. Walt pulled her into another kiss, his arms sliding around her. Vic broke the kiss and let her head come to rest on his chest. Walt dipped his face down beside her ear.
"I…would do anything for you, Vic. I need you to know that. I will do anything for you."
There was something in his tone that caused her to lift her head. Something that sent the vaguest chill down her spine.
"What are you saying?"
The words came out whispered. He glanced at the charred remains of the cabin. His expression was intense now. His hands slid over her hips and he pulled her flush against him, leaning his head forward until it made contact with her own.
"It means exactly what I said."
xxx
Vic was sitting on the guest bed scrolling through her phone when Cady stepped into the open doorway. Vic glanced up at the movement. She's heard Cady come in just a little while earlier.
"Hey."
Cady's greeting was tentative. Vic set her phone down on the bedside her.
"Hey. You need something?"
Cady looked around the room.
"Where's dad?"
"He went to see Henry. He should be back soon."
Cady stepped into the room.
"That's okay. I actually wanted to talk to you."
Vic nodded.
"Okay, what's up?"
Cady gestured at the bed.
"Can I sit?"
She still sounded somewhat hesitant.
"Sure."
Cady sat down on the bed and pulled her bare feet up. She had changed since she'd been home into jeans and a button-down shirt. She shifted around for several seconds like she was trying to get comfortable or think of a way to say whatever it was she was here to say.
"I didn't mean to overstep today at work."
It was clear from Vic's face that she was clueless as to what Cady was talking about.
"When I asked about you and dad fighting. I didn't mean to pry. I just…it's not like you guys. At least…it doesn't seem to be. I wasn't trying to get in your business or be nosy."
Vic's shoulders rose a little.
"I didn't think you were, Cady. It just didn't seem like the time or place to get into it. And…I'm sorry about that. You shouldn't feel dragged into our problems."
Cady waved a hand at her.
"I was worried more than anything. Is everything okay?"
"Yeah. It's fine."
Cady gave her a careful look.
"Are you sure? If you need to talk…"
She let the offer hang between them. Vic smiled.
"We're good, Cady. Stressed. But…good."
"So good you slept on the couch."
Vic looked down at her hands. It wasn't an unexpected comment.
"That was…a cooling off period. We talked this morning. I promise you that it's all good."
Vic's fingers twisted slightly on the bedspread. Cady gave a slight nod.
"I'm glad to hear that and a little relieved. You've been so good for him. He reminds me of the way he was before…before everything became such a mess."
Vic looked up from where her eyes had been on the bedspread.
"After your mother died."
Cady nodded.
"Yeah."
Vic leaned back a little, using her hands to brace herself.
"You don't need to skate around it, Cady. It's okay. He was married before. So was I. We have pasts. We've loved other people. That's…part of how we found each other. What…makes us who we are."
A smile pulled at Cady's lips.
"You're very philosophical tonight."
Vic laughed.
"It's been that kind of day."
Cady leaned forward.
"You want to talk about it?"
Vic gave her a curious look.
"Talk about what?"
"Whatever has you so…philosophical?"
She smiled when she said it, but the offer was genuine. Vic merely shook her head a little.
"Talk to Walt. There are some things that should come from him."
Cady's interest was clearly piqued.
"Now you're scaring me."
Vic smiled.
"I promise you that everything is fine between us. But, there is some information that should come from him. Talk to him. He should be here soon."
"Okay, sure."
Vic thought the conversation was over. But, Cady lingered in her spot on the bed like there was more she wanted to say.
"So…uh…how are you?"
"How am I?"
Cady nodded.
"A lot has happened. How are you holding up?"
"I'm okay."
Cady smiled.
"That seems to be your answer for everything. Are you really?"
Vic shrugged.
"I'm trying to be. But…it's hard. Walt mentioned finding somewhere to rent until we can get everything back to something resembling normal. So, hopefully we'll be out of your way soon."
Cady dismissed the idea.
"You're not in my way. I told you to stay as long as you needed and I meant it."
"I know. But…at some point…we need our own space."
She didn't elaborate, but Cady was a grown woman. She would understand. Or she should. She merely gave Vic a half smile.
"I get that. Believe me."
She pushed up off the bed.
"If you want to talk…about anything…I'm here."
Vic nodded.
"Thanks."
Cady waved and left the room. Vic sighed and flopped back onto the bed. Just a few minutes later, she heard the front door open and close. It would be Walt. Sure enough, he walked in and closed the door behind him. He paused when his eyes landed on her.
"Something wrong?"
Vic stayed where she was and shook her head.
"No. You find Henry?"
Walt nodded as he sat on the bed near her.
"Yep."
He turned so that he could look down at her.
"What did he say?"
Walt reached out and used his finger to push some hair back from her face.
"He was happy, of course."
With the same finger, he traced a path across her cheekbone and then down to her neck, stopping only when his finger met the top of her t-shirt. Vic cleared her throat in an attempt to focus her thoughts.
"You need to talk to Cady."
He nodded.
"I will. But…not tonight."
He leaned over and kissed her long and deep. Vic's hands came up from where they rested on her abdomen and slid into his hair. He moved so that he was hovering directly over her.
"Let's…go somewhere."
Her forehead crinkled in question.
"What?"
Walt stayed where he was.
"I want to be alone with you."
The words came out husky and thick. Vic swallowed.
"We are alone."
Walt glanced at the door before returning his eyes to hers.
"Cady is still up."
Vic shrugged, still on her back.
"So, we'll be quiet."
Walt shook his head, his eyes burning a hole through her.
"If you're quiet…then I'm doing it wrong."
Vic's eyes widened at the comment.
"Jesus."
He kissed her again. Again, the kiss was deep and slow. He was on her now, his frame stretched out over hers, his arms supporting his weight.
"Come with me."
Vic looked up into his face.
"Where?"
Walt pushed himself up, giving her room to sit up as well.
"You'll see."
He took her hand and pulled her off the bed.
xxx
"What…are we doing here. It's closed?"
Vic looked at the Red Pony's empty parking lot. Walt nodded.
"I know."
"So…I'm confused. We wouldn't have been alone here anyway."
Walt opened the door and stepped out of the Bronco, motioning for her to follow. He fished in the pocket of his coat and pulled out what must've been the key to the door of the bar. Vic gave him a curious look.
"Walt, what in the world?"
He unlocked the door and stepped back to give her room to enter. Vic walked by him and waited while he closed and secured the door. Turning, he waved her on.
"Come on."
Vic followed him as he led her up a familiar flight of stairs. She knew where they were going, but there was still some confusion in her mind.
"Why are we in Henry's apartment?"
Walt opened the door and flipped on the light. The space was mostly empty now, save the simple furniture Henry kept there.
"We're alone."
Vic looked around the small space and then back to Walt.
"Please tell me you're not going to suggest that we stay here until the new place is done."
Walt smiled as he tucked the bar key back into his pocket and removed his coat.
"No."
He approached her slowly. Lifting his hands to the front of her jacket, he started to unzip it.
"I was telling Henry about our plans. And, he offered me a room at the casino hotel. Somewhere to take you besides Cady's."
His eyes dropped from hers as he pushed her jacket off of her shoulders and tossed it over a chair. Turning back to her, his hands moved to the front of her jeans where he set about undoing them while he talked.
"The casino…didn't feel right. With everything in the past. So, he told me we could come here."
He paused in his task and met her eyes again. Vic tilted her head.
"You passed up a room at a hotel for this?"
There was a hint of amusement in the words. Walt shrugged.
"There's so many people there. And…I just…"
His hands resumed their movement and he pulled her shirt and the thermal she wore underneath it loose from her pants. His fingers pushed underneath them and touched the bare skin of her side. Vic inhaled at the contact.
"I know. You don't like the casino."
He nodded as he dipped his face and kissed her. The kiss was simple, but lingering. As his mouth pulled back, he spoke low and throaty.
"This seemed…more us."
His hands found the hem of both her shirts and he pulled upward. Vic raised her arms as Walt tugged the shirt over her head. He tossed them onto the floor and turned back to her. Skimming his palms up her bare arms, he paused at her bra strap and considered it. Meeting her eyes, he ran one of his thumbs over her still covered breast.
"I'm sorry if I made you feel like I didn't want you last night, Vic. Nothing is farther from the truth. I…feel like I don't tell you enough what you mean to me. And, I should know better."
Her breathing was shallow now. And fast.
"It's okay."
Walt shook his head, his eyes still holding hers.
"No, it's not. I don't know what's gonna happen in the coming days. But, you need to know how important you are to me."
He leaned in a kissed her again. Vic's hands tightened on his shirt. In that moment, her mind flashed back to sitting with Walt in his Bronco, her own emotions swirling inside her. His hand closing over her arm and pulling her to him, their lips meeting.
Maybe I shouldn't do that anymore.
He told her later, after everything, that he kissed her in that moment because of the threat that loomed in front of them. The showdown with Malachi Strand. The attempt to rescue Jacob Nighthorse, in spite of all the bad blood that existed between them. He knew there was a possibility they might not both come out the other side. On the backside of the conflict, at his cabin, they finally released everything that was pent up inside of them. That singular moment in their collective lives set everything else in motion. Everything that led them up to this point. The point earlier in the day when he asked her to marry him in his own way.
Even in her cluttered mind, it didn't escape Vic that now they stood on the cusp of yet another showdown. Although, this one was murkier with no set time or place. It was a threat that loomed in the shadows. One which they had little control over.
He reached up and stroked the back of his knuckles across her cheek slowly. The move caused her eyes to flutter closed.
"I wonder sometimes…"
Her eyes opened to find Walt watching her.
"…why you choose to live in a little cabin at the edge of nothing with a washed-up old Sheriff who can't offer you very much. There's so much more that you could be doing with your life. So many other places that you could be."
Vic swallowed. It wasn't frequent that he spoke like this. But, it was a welcome change from the silence she'd been subjected to since the fire.
"But I am thankful that you do."
A hot swell of emotion burned in the back of her throat. Vic opened her mouth to respond, but Walt kissed her and silenced any words she might've spoken. When he pulled back, it was just a bit, his breath still hot on her skin.
"I told you before, Vic. There is nothing that I won't do for you."
His words both touched and disturbed her. On the one hand, it was deep expression from a man who frequently struggled to express himself. But, there was also something in his words that gave her a sense of darkness on the horizon. She knew what he was saying. There was no need for him to expound on it. But, he kissed her again and the doubts in her mind were washed away by the feelings that he was creating inside of her. Vic's hands rose to pull at the snaps on his shirt. Walt smiled against her mouth and started to guide her backwards towards the bed.
xxx
"Vic?"
"Hmm?"
She shifted her head against the pillow, her eyes closed. Walt lay on his side, his head propped on his hand so that he could see her. Vic was beside him on her back, the tilt of her neck bringing her head into contact with the upper part of his arm and shoulder.
"Are you awake?"
His voice was soft in the quiet of the room.
"Mmm…barely."
He shifted, causing her eyes to open. Vic looked up at him.
"What?"
He hesitated before answering.
"I think that we should get married soon. We can go to the justice of the peace and be done with it."
Vic continued to look up at him.
"You make it all sound so romantic."
He huffed a little with a barely there laugh at the dryness in her tone.
"I don't mean it like that. I just…I think we should go ahead with it."
She was awake now. Fully.
"Why?"
When he didn't answer, she sat up causing him to move out of her way from where he hovered over her.
"So that it's done and legal."
Vic sighed, the relaxation she felt minutes before melting away.
"Walt, I really need you to stop talking like you're gonna die. It's a real mood killer."
"I'm serious. "
Vic pushed her hair back behind her ear.
"So am I."
"Vic, Cain…"
Vic sighed loudly enough to make him stop.
"We almost made it the whole damn night without you bringing him up."
He could hear the dismay in her voice as well as read it on her face.
"I'm sorry."
Vic shook her head at him.
"No, you're not. You're planning something in your head and I want you to stop."
"I can't."
Vic bit the inside of her cheek for a second, her eyes on him.
"Then…I won't marry you."
Walt's mouth opened slightly in surprise.
"What?"
"You heard me. I won't marry you. You…you're planning this future with me. Or, you act like you are. All your talk about marriage and rebuilding the cabin. But, it's all bullshit because at the same time, you're planning to what…go after him on your own. Maybe not come back. Fuck that."
"Vic…"
"No. Walt. No. If you want to marry me…then we are in this together. I thought you understood that. I thought you understood what real partnership was. I guess I was wrong. So, there's no point. Is there?"
He clearly hadn't been expecting her reaction to be quite what it was. And Vic honed in on it.
"Did you think I would be okay with this? Did you really think that I would be willing to sit at home while you took this on yourself? Because, if you did, you don't know me at all."
"Vic, if he comes after us again, I won't sit by and let your life be in danger."
Vic waved a hand at him.
"So, let me get this straight. You want me to be okay with you risking your life. But, you don't want me to risk mine. Why? Because I'm a woman?"
"No, because I love you."
She narrowed her eyes at him.
"And you think I don't love you? Do you realize how stupid that sounds? Not to mention the double standard. You know I hate that."
She dropped her voice a bit.
"No, Walt. We do this together."
She could read the protest on his face before he gave it a voice. Vic tilted her head.
"I'll tell Cady that you're planning whatever the hell you're planning and she'll lock you up. You know she will."
Walt leaned in.
"You wouldn't."
Vic smiled at him.
"Try me."
Walt's face registered the frustration he was clearly feeling. Vic slid closer to him on the bed, her arm touching his.
"I'll marry you whenever you want me to, however you want. But, we do this together. All of it."
Walt studied her. He could hear the resolve in her voice and see it in her eyes. Vic leaned farther into him.
"I am not willing to sacrifice you for this son of a bitch. I'm willing to sacrifice almost anything, but not this. Not you. If you want to marry me, then you have to promise me that we are in this together."
Walt sighed and his head bobbed ever so slightly.
"Okay."
Vic shook her head.
"Promise me, Walt. No more of this lone warrior shit."
He was quiet for a moment before he answered.
"I promise."
She nodded, accepting his words.
"Okay. So…when do you want to get married?"
Walt considered her for a moment.
"You free tomorrow?"
Vic's eyes widened.
"Tomorrow. Are you serious?"
Walt shrugged.
"You said whenever."
Vic blew out a breath.
"You need to talk to Cady."
His face grew serious.
"Right."
Vic nodded.
"You talk to Cady tomorrow. And…we'll do it the next day. Fair?"
Walt smiled at her.
"Fair."
xxx
Cady stared at him across her kitchen table.
"Tomorrow?"
Walt nodded.
"Yeah, Punk. Tomorrow."
Cady leaned her elbows on the table.
"That's…what's the rush?"
Walt swallowed.
"It's important to me."
Cady regarded him with something that approached suspicion.
"Is there something going on that I don't know about?"
Walt's face revealed nothing.
"I'm sure there's lot of things you don't know about."
She shook her head at him.
"Something specific?"
His expression remained passive.
"Cady, this is something that I want. When you consider where we are in life, we're not really rushing."
Cady sighed.
"Dad, I don't mean that in a bad way. I know Vic is it for you. I'm happy for you. I get why you want to marry her. It just seems…doesn't she want a wedding?"
Walt shook his head.
"She already had a wedding. That's not important. To either of us. Lately, I've just been reminded that life is short. We should live it to the best of our ability and not have any regrets."
Cady's face softened.
"I know that, dad. Is this about this mess with Will Cain?"
Walt's eyes dropped from hers.
"It's just made me think of how fragile everything is. I had a lot of regrets after your mother died. I don't want that again."
Cady nodded.
"Okay. I'll support whatever you want. I assume you're talking a civil ceremony."
Walt ran his fingers over the table top.
"Yes. We can get the license today and get married tomorrow. I've only told you and Henry. I'll tell Ruby, Ferg, and Zach as well. Honestly outside of you all…no one else matters to me."
"Are you going to have a reception or anything?"
Walt immediately looked uncomfortable with the idea.
"Maybe later. Once we build a new cabin. We can have something then if that's what Vic wants."
Cady looked around.
"Where is she? I haven't seen her all morning."
Walt shrugged.
"I'm…not sure where she went. She told me that you and I needed some time alone and she left. Told me she would be back after a while."
Cady reached out and placed her hand on his.
"I think…that mom would be happy for you."