Chapter 15: Mending the Bough

"Does Castle remember anything new?" Ryan asks over the phone. He and Espo have Beckett on speaker phone. She can almost picture them huddled together at Ryan's desk, like two homesick kids at camp.

Castle had tried to find some information on what happened to him during his missing months and was somewhat successful. But after just a little more digging and against Kate's personal feelings about the situation, Castle decided to drop the whole thing. He said he wanted to move on and not dig up the secrets he buried from himself. She was starting to accept that, but she wasn't going to tell the boys about it, because they probably would be as unsatisfied with it as she was, so she shakes her head, "No, and that's not why I'm calling."

Ryan replies, after a lack of response from Esposito, "What's up?"

"Can you see what the address is for Natasha's last foster home?"

"Um… Yeah, what's Natasha's last name?"

"Siviac," Beckett answers, ignoring Ryan's hesitance.

"Okay, just give me a minute," Ryan says, still sounding unsure.

Beckett kind of expects to be left in silence from that point on, but Esposito's voice comes through the phone, harshly teasing her, "Hey, Beckett, when are you coming back so me and Ryan can stop doing your errands?"

She can tell he's just messing with her, so she smiles. She actually misses them a lot and she has been having them do a lot for her, especially when Castle was missing. "Monday, why do you guys miss me?"

"Hell yeah, Ryan's-"

"8192 McHenry Ln." Ryan interrupts with an unexpected and unnecessary amount of urgency. "She was being fostered by a couple named Trey and Valerie Gilbert."

"Thanks, Ryan," She says trying to hold back a laugh.

"That's not all Beckett. In 2010 to 2011, they were fostering Lux. They even started the adoption process, but it fell through."

Beckett looks down into her lap. All joking is now cleared from her mind. She breaths, "Thanks."

Esposito can hear the change in her tone, "What's up, Beckett?"

"Nothing, I was just curious… I'll see you guys Monday."

"See you then."

"See ya, Beckett," Espo echoes, still concerned.

…

Lux comes crashing into the apartment. Rather recently, Kate had come to the realization that Lux is loud. Not vocally loud, just her presence is loud. She closes doors loudly, she's not the best cook so between her complaining and the fire alarm going off she cooks loudly, and she even keeps her shoes on in the apartment a lot of the time, so she walks loudly. It's a funny contrast to Tasha who is like living with a mouse, but has no problem speaking what's on her mind. It never really bothers Kate. In fact, it seems to fit Lux's personality, but still it startles her sometimes. Kate looks up from her book, "Where's Tasha?"

Lux mischievously grins, "She stayed after to study."

Kate closes her book, now filled with curiosity, and asks, "Am I missing something?" Kate by no means was discouraging the idea of Tasha (or Lux) staying after school to study, or studying at all. The only person Kate's ever seen get worse grades than Lux is Tasha. That being said, Lux now had an occupational therapist, Abigail, who is hopefully helping Lux to raise her GPA, so Tasha getting some help of her own is not unwanted just surprising.

Well it was surprising until Lux filled in for Kate, "The quarterback asked to study with her."

"Oh," Kate smiles.

"Yeah," Lux agrees, grinning back at her. "She said she'd be back by four." Kate looks at her watch. It is two forty-five so four seems fair. It also means Abby will be there in about fifteen minutes. Lux walks over to the chair Kate is sitting in and say, "Kate?"

The seriousness in her tone makes Kate turn in her chair, "Yeah?"

"I know it's like the first time in months that someone wasn't moving in or out of… wherever, but we're not actually going to stay here, like forever, are we?"

Kate turns to look at her better, "I thought you didn't want to move back to the loft."

"I didn't- I thought maybe it would be better if we all just got some space, but I think I was being a bit selfish. I wanted to protect myself more than you. And not from Castle, but from being hurt or being left behind," Lux stares at Kate who is still, her undivided attention on her Lux, because she can so perfectly understand that feeling. Lux's face melts into a frown, "I thought you'd be happy. I thought this is what you wanted."

Kate closes her eyes. That's what she was waiting for, what she was worried about, and what she really hoped Lux wasn't going to say. Kate softly counters, "I don't want you to do this for me, Lux. Castle and I are fine, but we want you to be able to trust us."

Lux walks over and sits across from Kate. "Kate," she smiles a huge smile before continuing, "The fact that you guys care. That-that's it. I can't make myself trust you guys, but if I needed something, a magic ingredient that could make me, that's it."

A smile quickly grows across Kate's face. She nods, "Okay." Lux's smile falls, when there is a knock on the door. She quickly gets up and trudges to the door to let Abby in.

…

Castle opens the door and with a warm welcome he smiles, "Hello, Detective Beckett."

She smiles, but doesn't reply. She silently passes him, entering the loft. His smile fades as he slowly closes the door. He turns to her, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, actually," she says, nervously pushing her hair behind her ear. He raises his eyebrows, not tearing his eyes off her. She adds, "Lux told me she wants to move back here."

He shocks, "Really? That's awesome." He stops himself from getting too excited and tries to reread her face, trying to find his enthusiasm reflected in her expression. He asks, "You don't want to?"

"No, I do, it's just- I'm worried, I guess."

"What are you worried about?"

"I'm worried that you're not ready for that- that we're not ready for that."

"You've already lived here before."

"Before you went missing," Kate exclaims. She lets the last words fall out of her mouth effortlessly because they were coming out harsher than she meant them to, "for two months."

He tries to keep the condescension out of his tone as he reassures her, "Kate, I'm not going to go missing again."

"You don't know that, Castle. You were the one that said I have to think of Lux now." She's getting closer to him, as she talks, as if to physically remind him that she's still there. "I still don't know what happened to you for two months- you don't know."

"You know I don't want to dig into it any further than I have-"

"I know, Castle, and I get it. It's just…" her voice dies out. She has more to say, but she can't decide if she really wants to go down that road.

He reaches for her hands, bringing himself a bit closer to her. "Kate, I can't promise you anything, but I will always be right here, next to you."

She looks up at him, sucking in her bottom lip. She takes one deep breath, closing her eyes and when she opens them, he is still looking back at her, waiting. She almost expected him to be gone, to disappear like dust in a dream. But he's not gone. He's right there, just like he promised. Slowly her smile emerges and it reflects on his face. "I believe you, but always?" The way she says it in her joking tone he hadn't heard from her in a long time.

"Well as long as you'll have me," he jokingly reassures.

She smiles, pressing her forehead to his and wrapping her hands around the nape of his neck. She closes one eye, pursing her lips as if to consider him, then just smiles at him and just before pressing her lips to his, she says, "Always sounds good."

…

If Kate had the time and energy for a dog, she would probably get a German Shepherd. They are tough and loyal, a bit of a cliché for anyone working in the justice system, but still great dogs. That being in the back of her mind, the German Shepherd looking mutt, that is barking at her from its chained spot behind a gate, does not seem like a dog she wants to get to know. In fact, it kind of makes her not want to go up and knock on the door. She's less afraid and more thinking of it as a bad omen, a door that leads to a world of secrets that maybe should be left well enough alone. This is breaking Lux's trust, no question about, but this is her caring. This is how she protects her loved ones, how she shows she cares. It only takes a moment before she shakes it off. She walks up the few steps to the fence's entrance. She walks down the sidewalk that leads to the light purple house. The house seems quite worn, but still better than the house Lux was living in before Kate got her. Kate marches up the steps to the front door, then lightly knocks. It's not long before a woman peers through the curtains, before opening the door with a smile.

"Hi, can I help you?" the woman asks.

When Kate first gets a good look at the woman, she thinks she's plain looking, but has a sweet smile and bright eyes. She kind of thinks she matches the house. She automatically seems more 'momish' than Kate… she's even wearing an apron. "Are you Valerie?"

The woman's smile falters a bit, "Yes, can I help you?"

"I wanted to ask you about a girl you fostered a couple years back."

"Whatever you want should be on file. Caseworkers are supposed to go through the state," Valerie says, suddenly seeming exhausted by Kate.

"Actually, I'm not a caseworker. I'm Lux's mom."

At this Valerie's face goes, to Kate, into an unnecessary amount of shock. She slowly opens the door wider and softly invites, "Come in."

Kate gives her a quick smile as she walks in. To the left of the entrance is a living room and to the right is a dining room. Right in front of her is a flight of stairs, which Kate assumes leads to an upstairs, where the bedrooms probably are. Valerie brings her attention back by instructing, "You can sit in here," she offers walking into the living room. "I just need to pull some food out of the oven, but make yourself comfortable." It's an interesting phrasing because even when Kate sits down on the small couch she has an awfully uneasy feeling that makes her unable to get even the slightest bit relaxed. It is only a short while before Valerie comes and sits down across Kate. "I can assume you want to talk about Lux?"

"Yes."

"Well I haven't talked to Lux since she was twelve, I-"

"Well that's just it," Kate interrupts, then takes a breath, because she feels like she is starting to act like and interrogating detective, not a mother expressing her concerns. "Lux has this condition called dysgraphia, from a stroke she had when she was younger. The doctor thinks the stroke was caused by a physical trauma, something harsh or violent. Do you remember anything like that happening when she lived here…A car accident, maybe?"

Valerie stuns for a second, before asking, "Did you ask Lux about it?"

"Yeah, I did but she didn't really seem like she wanted to talk about it. In fact, she lied to me and told me she was living in Sunnyvale during junior high."

"I see," Valerie nods, but then the next thing she says suddenly seems defensive, "Did Lux tell you that her friend Tasha was living here recently? That I was fostering her? That the two of them graffitied my house."

Kate really wants to say 'yes, I did know that, because I took in Tasha too,' but she knows how defensive that sounds. That being said in the grand scheme of things she's on Lux and Tasha's side, especially with Valerie's change in manner. "Yes, but I assumed you had changed you mind and didn't want her anymore."

"And I'm sure that if you asked Lux about her time here, that she would say the same thing, but my husband and I wanted Lux, just as much as we wanted Tasha, more. Lux she was like a daughter to me."

Kate squints, "Do mind me asking, what happened with you and Lux?"

Valerie gives a soft smile. "Just one second." She gets up from her chair and walks over to a cabinet and pulls out a sand colored shoebox. She then brings the box over and sits down next to Kate. "This is all I have from Lux's time here." Valerie looks at Kate as if checking to see if it's okay to open it and with a lack of protest gently pulls off the lid and sets it under the box. She then hands it over to Kate to look through.

Kate runs her fingers through the papers. Most of the papers are pictures or folded up worksheets, but a pink polka dotted, folded piece of paper is what catches Kate's attention. She pulls it out as Valerie comments, "This is my favorite. It's from my birthday." The front of the card reads 'Happy Birthday Mom.' Kate almost thinks about not opening it, but curiosity gets the better of her. On the inside, Lux has written a note, 'Dear Mom! This has been the best year. I've loved being here with you. Hope you have a happy birthday! You're the best. Love you, Lux.' Kate bites her lip, before forcing herself to reflect the smile Valerie has on. Kate can barely imagine the Lux Valerie knew, a Lux that calls anyone mom, that has perfect writing, and puts on honest smiles. Kate hands the card to Valerie and softly says, "That's sweet."

"You know, Kate, there may be a reason why Lux never told you she was living here." Kate slightly perks up at the statement. She had almost forgotten the question she had asked, before Valerie brought out the box. "There was a violent incident. It's just the one who was violent was Lux."

"I beg your pardon?" Kate asks, big eyed with skepticism, not really believing her. Lux has been a lot of things. Violent isn't one of them.

"She was fine when she first came here. And I was always trying to make up for the life she led before she got to me, but it was like I could never do enough for her. The harder I tried to connect to her, the more she lashed out at me."

"Lashed out?" Valerie did seem more sincere now, but Kate couldn't help but think this still didn't quite sound like Lux. Sure Valerie may have known a different Lux back then, but everything else pointed to a happier Lux, not a more violent one.

"She hit my husband, she hurt him badly. She told lie upon lie, and it sounds like she still does." Kate looks at her eyes big and lips tightly pressed together. Valerie must see that Kate is unsure about the whole thing because she adds or more or less warns, "There's nothing worse than not being able to trust the people that you love."

…

"Height: nature, nurture, or both?"

"Isn't this like freshmen year stuff?"

"Yeah, but my teacher my teacher is doing a month of review to see what we remember." Lux explains to Tasha, "Why does everything have to be accompanied by a worksheet?"

"Because it's school," Tasha replies, sarcastically. Tasha is in the living room, leaning against the back of a chair. She has a baseball pinned under her heal, rolling it back and forth to massage the bottom of her socked foot.

Lux, who is sitting at the kitchen island, rolls her eyes even though her back is to Tasha, "Nature, nurture, or both?"

"Both," Tasha answers.

"Okay…" she says, marking the answer on her paper. "Eye color is nature. What about athletic abilities?"

Before Tasha can come up with an answer, Kate comes through the door. She looks slightly nervous with her hands clasped together in front of her. They must look worried, because Kate smiles at them as if to reassure them. "What's up?"

Lux quickly answers, "Tasha and I are debating the powers of nurture and nature."

Kate pulls off her boots and walks over to the kitchen. "Hmm, I mean no offense by this, but shouldn't that be easy-" she narrows her eyes "-for the two of you."

Lux opens her mouth to say something, but can't find the words, so instead just huffs a laugh.

Tasha on the other hand decides to try to challenge her, "Athletic skills: nurture, nature, or both."

Lux turns herself in her chair to be able to see them both as they talk. Kate smiles, up for the challenge. She leans her hip against the counter standing next to Lux. It actually is kind of a hard question. She personally has always liked to believe that her love (and rather great skill set for baseball) was a genetic trait given to her by her father, but it only seems realistic that it is a nurture type thing. Suddenly looking unsure she says, "Both…"

Tasha shrugs and turns to Lux, "I vote nurture." She bends down and picks up the ball from underneath her foot.

Kate still seems unsure as she says, "I'm not sure."

Tasha holds up the ball, showing it to Kate for a second before smoothly throwing it to her. She catches it with ease. Kate throws it up in the air and catches it again. Tasha widens her eyes, as if to ask for her to the throw the ball back, which she does. Tasha catches it with just as much ease as Kate. "Nurture," Tasha says, confidently smirking, then turns to Lux. She swings her arm for preparation (more for Lux's benefit than her own.) Then with an underarm throw she tosses the ball to Lux, who tries to catch it by closing her eyes and holding her hands out like a clam. She fumbles it a couple of times before it's firmly caught in the crook of her arm. "Tasha looks at her still with a (now obviously knowing) smile. "Not nature."

"Yeah… I can't argue with that," Lux says, lightly tossing the ball back to Kate, who is only a foot or so away from her.

Kate agrees, especially with Lux's humorous attempt at catch, but can't help but counter, "So it's nurture because I can catch a ball-"

"Because someone taught you," Tasha adds into Kate's conclusion.

"And Lux can't-"

"'Cause you didn't teach me," Lux fills in.

Lux's comment only throws off Kate a second. "-But what about Tasha?" Kate asks, as she throws the ball back to Tasha. The playful banter seems to have come to an end. Kate sees Lux's face fall, her teeth gritted as she looks down.

Tasha rolls the ball back and forth between her hands, anxiously. "I used to live with my mom."

"Tasha, I'm sorry. I-"

"No, it's fine," she says. "She had me on and off again until I was thirteen. She signed me up for an athletic camp a couple of times. It was to keep me out of the house while she did drugs, but she told me it was to teach me a lesson. I remember she told me, 'It is a man's world and to be a part of it you have to act the part.'"

"That's-" Kate bites her lip, she feels for Tasha and has no intention to offend her.

Evidently that doesn't stop Lux, "Really bad advice.

"Oh, thank you," Tasha snaps in a playful manner that seems to hide how she actually feels about the remark and the whole situation in general. She chucks the ball harshly against Lux's shoulder.

Kate turns her head to the side, as if to scold Tasha for her childish and violent behavior, but she doesn't say anything aloud. She turns to Lux and asks, "Lux, can you give me and Tasha a minute?"

Lux whines, "She threw the ball at me."

This time Kate doesn't let the childish behavior pass, "Really?" Lux rolls her eyes, gathers her things and walks to the bedroom. Kate can't help but ponder her own question. Did someone yesterday really tell me that she is violent? She just whined like a small child, because I wanted her to leave the room for a minute.

Tasha goes and sits at the table, a seat over from where Lux was just sitting, distancing herself further away from Kate. She turns her body so she can get a better look at Tasha. There had been a plan when Kate walked in the door. She had a plan to tell them that they were going back to how they all used to live. She had finally agreed to move back into the loft and Tasha was already cleared by Fern to continue living in the apartment as an independent ward of the state.

"Tasha," Kate says trying to grab her attention. Tasha turns. She sucks in her bottom lip in a way that shows that she's already irritated and not wanting to be babied about her mom. "What do you think about me and Lux moving back to the loft?"

Tasha sits up straighter, her bright blue eyes growing wide with her full attention on Kate. "What about me?"
"You'd be back to independent living, here that is."

Tasha seems to only ever so slightly relax, "No, foster care."

Kate smiles and shakes her head, "Absolutely no foster care."

"Sounds great," Tasha shrugs, now much more confident and assured.

Even so, Kate double checks, "Are you sure?"

"Lux kicks me while we sleep, she prefers the room as a disaster, and when I do come out of the disaster every morning I have to tip toe around you. Yes, it's fine."

"Good," Kate says with a huff of relief.

"But not today, right?"

"No," Kate shakes her head and jokes, "We need to pack." She pushes off the counter to stand up straighter. "But I was thinking we could go out to eat."

"Where?" Tasha questions, which Kate returns with a smile.

…

At the sound of knock on the door, Castle smiles at Alexis, "Must be our dinner guests." Alexis mirrors the smile and practically skips to the door. She swings it open and is quickly joined by Castle holding the door open above her.

Kate smiles and refers to Tasha as she says, "Hope you don't mind I brought an extra."

"Of course not, right Dad?"

"Of course not," Castle assures. Kate is almost one hundred percent sure that she could have invited Pi as well, and Castle wouldn't have cared. He seems completely overjoyed that they are there to the point that nothing could bring him down.

"So can we come in then?" Lux asks.

Tasha adds, "I'm starving." Kate scrunches her nose, unsure of how she feels about the lack of manners from her ducklings.

Alexis opens the door wider, slightly shoving her father with the door, welcoming Kate, Lux, and Tasha into the loft. "Come in," Castle welcomes.

The last couple of times Kate had set foot in the loft it had felt warmer. It was breathable, like a summer day with all the windows open. The last day she lived here it was cold. A choking frigid that would make anyone feel like their lungs were about to collapse. But now it was warm and cozy, returning to its friendly and welcoming potential. It seemed easy to feel warm and joyful with the five of them there breathing a new air into the place. They all seemed happy and at peace. It was a much desired feeling from the last four and a half months. She almost just wants to stand there and soak it up like the sun. Everyone else had started making their way into the loft. Castle, of course, notices her lack of motion, but doesn't stop the girls. He looks alarmed as he asks, "What's wrong?"

She has concerns and worries, but not about this. This she knows is right. This is what she wants, the warm and cozy loft with their happy family, all of it and nothing less. She looks up at him, her grin only being somewhat suppressed, "Nothing."

He smiles back instantly feeling relieved. He truly believes her shoulders are weightless in that moment and he isn't wrong. He paces towards her, and kisses the top of her head, before guiding her in, one arm remaining around her shoulders. "Then what are we waiting for?"

Comments, Questions, or Concerns: Please review below. Also I'm thinking I'm only going to write five or six more chapters, so suggestions are welcome. I'll keep you updated once I start getting closer to the end.