It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing

Chapter 9

The sun came in through the curtains as Elena opened her eyes. Damon's arms were around her as she took in her surroundings. This wasn't her house but this was the first time she could ever remember waking up in peace. But peace came at a price, she was sure her mother would give her an ass whopping so hard that she would never find peace again. After all her mother was good at destroying her life in various ways. At least she could enjoy this moment for a little bit longer before it all went to hell.

She turned slightly careful not to wake Damon as she looked at his face. His eyes were still closed and she had to admit he was pretty cute, but she couldn't keep watching him sleep. She sighed and cuddled into him further. She loved feeling his body next to hers. She loved feeling a peaceful moment in this chaotic world of hers. She was just glad that at least she had this if she were going to die soon.

Damon's eyelids fluttered open as his blue eyed gaze filled her own. She sucked in a breath finding it hard to breath all of a sudden. She had never had this feeling before usually the guys she woke up with either repulsed her or scared the living hell out of her, but for Damon he was neither one of those things. With him she didn't feel scared she felt safe and that's the way she should have always felt. Unfortunately life didn't work that way. Especially when it came to her own. She had to get out of here before this illusion fooled her further. She couldn't take this moment of perfection when her life was so chaotic.

She sprang off the bed moving towards her clothes and threw them back on. They had about forty minutes before school and she didn't want to make her mom more upset. Maybe she would go easier on her that way.

Damon looked at her squinting slightly. "What are you doing?"

"Getting ready for school like a normal person."

"Well normal people usually don't go to school on Saturday."

Elena stopped looking at Damon. Shit. It couldn't be Saturday. Without school she had no safe haven from her mother. What the hell was she going to do now?

"You can stay here as long as you like you don't have to go back to her."

Elena nodded and sat back down on the bed. She had to admit that she didn't want to go back to her mother just yet. She had to give her a chance to calm down first. It was the least she could do for her mother at the moment.

Damon scooted closer to her and put his arms around her. They still hadn't talked about what happened last night and they really needed to. It was best not to avoid these kind of topics. She was running from too much already. She didn't want to add him to the list.

"We need to talk about what happened last night." she said looking at him.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"What exactly are we now?"

"What did you want us to be Elena?"

"I asked you first."

Damon sighed as he looked to his window. She followed his gaze and looked out into the peaceful day for most subterranean people. She wondered if her life would have been any different if she had grown up in this environment instead of the one she was currently in. Would her mom treat her differently or would her demons still consume her on harsh nights? She had no real clue so she decided not to dwell on it too much. It was just during these times that she found it hard to cope with her current situation.

Elena sighed looking away from her shattered dreams of a normal life ad turned Damon's face back towards her. She had to admit she had no clue what they were, but she was hoping that he would stay with her until her life ended. Whether it was from her own accord or somebody else s.

She looked at Damon willing him to answer her question. All she really needed was one simple answer.

"To tell you the truth Elena, I don't know exactly what we are. All I really know for sure is that I want to keep you safe. I don't want a repeat of what happened last night. I can't imagine losing you to her or losing you at all even. It's the reason I'm trying to keep you alive so much even though all you really want right now is to take your own."

Elena bit on her lip trying not to interrupt. She didn't know how she felt about this whole suicide thing anymore all she really knew was that now she was conflicted. Sure her home life was still terrible, but now she had another person to take into factor. A person who would actually genuinely miss her if she was gone. decisions were always simple for her, but they were becoming more complicated now.

She sighed and leaned into Damon. She wasn't sure what they were either but she knew that she was willing to find out. No matter what the cost was. She just hoped that at some point Damon would feel the same.