AN: Thank you to the comments and favs/follows, I really do appreciate the encouragement! Knowing there's people actually reading this waffle is what keeps me returning to plod away at it again and again, even if it's only to squeeze a few words out here and there.

Conversations
- Part XII-

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"The hyperdrive has shut down and the sublight engines are refusing to engage." Rey checks a few overhead switches before tapping a touchpad on the cockpit control panel. "But at least we know the warp vortex stabilizer still works. And life support."

Kylo meets her small burst of laughter with a blank frowning stare; an expression that remains a stoic fixture even as the overhead light flickers with a power fluctuation and casts dancing shadows across his face.

"See, this is why you should have traded in this junk bucket for something - anything - else." The barely checked frustration is evident as he scrubs a hand across his face and groans into his palm, "a modified Gungun Bongo, for example, would've been an improvement."

"You can't seriously hate the Millenium Falcon that much?" Rey snorts. Kylo looks up from behind clenched hands with an expression that sends a very clear yes.

"Okay," she mutters leaning across him to flip some switches, "maybe you can."

"Don't forget I've known this flying garbage chute longer than you," he reaches to still her hand with his own. "And that won't work. The problem - one of the problems anyway - is in the rectenna. I'm guessing the Siep-Irol sensor has shorted out, which means that without the ability to process topographical information from any potential nearby obstacles -"

"- the sublight engines won't engage without knowing where we're going." Rey finishes, stomach sinking.

He nods. "We can hard reset the nav computer, but until we get the rectenna repaired, we're floating trash."

Rey stares for a long moment, expecting him to tag on a derogatory quip. When it's apparent he's actually going to hold his tongue, her attention shifts to question, "what do you know of fixing this ship, anyway?"

"Muscle memory," Kylo says with a shrug, a strange expression on his face.

An impression comes to Rey's mind of a ten-year-old boy, handing his father a plasma welder as the Falcon drifts along the edge of an asteroid field. "That's the one, Ben. See, you're better help than an astromech. Better company, too"

Beside her Kylo freezes, caught for a moment in the memory, she wonders. But before she can say a word, he's shaking his head back to the present. "The problem's on the outside. We need to get an astromech out to the rectenna to fix it. But since we don't have a droid…"

Rey nods in understanding. "I'll have to call in a favour from Finn. You can hide in the cargo hold while BB8 sorts out the rectenna, and I'll tell them I vented you out with the garbage -"

"Call in a favour. From FN-2187." A dark cloud passes over Kylo's face. "I'd sooner throw on an EVA suit and fix it myself."

"Yes. I'm sure you would." Rey folds her arms across her chest. "Except there are no EVA suits onboard."

Running a hand through his hair, Kylo leans back into the pilot seat and stares through the transparisteel canopy above as he ponders their options.

Rey sucks in a breath, conflict pulling at her like a caught thread. In his casual black sweater with tousled hair and day-old stubble on his jaw, he doesn't fit the guise of Kylo Ren at all. Right now, he could just be the roguish son of Han Solo. If only he would allow himself.

"Ben?"

Drawing his gaze from the stars beyond the canopy, he looks to her with expectancy. She waits for him to correct her on the name, but he just raises a brow for her to continue as if he hasn't even noticed. Like it's muscle memory.

"I umm…" she flounders, searching her brain for words to chase the sudden flush from her cheeks.

"We need my shuttle," he interrupts suddenly, leaning forward. "I'll send a mayday signal to the Retribution."

"Ben, no. That's a terrible id-"

"It's a perfect idea. I'll tell Hux I escaped capture by the Resistance and instruct him to prepare the shuttle with our co-ordinates. My BB-unit will take care of the rest." He pauses, adding as an afterthought, "that's not my name."

"Urgh!" Rey rolls her eyes. "We're back to this? The moment you contact the First Order, you tell them you're still alive. This is your chance to - can't you just - think about this for a bit?"

"Rey, I've already contacted the First Order."

"What?" Rey freezes. Stunned.

"Listen -"

"I can't believe I actually thought you might -"

"No, listen!" Kylo's roar cuts through Rey's protests. The eye tic flutters. "If I didn't undo that kind of damage - if I allowed Hux to gain control, he would undo everything I'm trying to… You know, I thought we were done with this discussion already."

He twists off the words with a snarl, spinning the seat away as he glares once more at the stars beyond them.

For a long moment, Rey fights to get her own anger under control as she stares in silence at his profile. There's a ferocity to the set of Kylo's jaw that she recognizes well. The difference is, she's not afraid of him anymore.

"You brought me into this to help defeat an enemy to both of us," she says gently, "but what becomes of us after we take out Palpatine?"

In the silence that follows, it occurs to her that perhaps neither of them have really thought this far ahead, until now.

Sinking into the co-pilot's seat, she swivels towards him with a sigh. "Can you honestly tell me you'll return to the First Order after this and continue hunting down the Resistance? Me? Your mother? Because if that's the case, I think it best we go our separate ways now, Supreme Leader."

A low sound escapes Kylo's throat, and something in her mind tells her it's despair. She waits, relentless, as he chews the inside of his mouth. As if trying out the taste of his response.

Finally, he swings his seat towards her. The depth of weariness in his eyes is confronting. "Let me put it to you this way, Rey, since you can't seem to see it any other. Who would you prefer to be leading the First Order? Me, or General Hux?"

"I know nothing of Hux, nor of his capabilities as a leader," she grinds, irritation rising once more. "I only know of the terrible things Kylo Ren has done. And yet, that's the name you expect me to call you by - and trust you on. Can you not see where I'm coming from?"

He says nothing to that, and she silently notches it up as a small win. If only for a fleeting moment.

"Hux is the man responsible for the destruction of the entire Hosnian system," he says finally. "Hux has overseen the indoctrination of a new generation of stormtroopers - children stolen from their homes. Under his command."

"Are you trying to tell me you disagree with that?" Rey can't even try to hide her disbelief. "Because if that were true, why keep him around? Why not demote him and replace him with someone else?"

"Who? Cut off the head of one and another…" Kylo hisses through gritted teeth. "Even as Supreme Leader, my hands are tied in bureaucracy. The best I can do for now is to keep him leashed."

From the edge of her peripheral, she sees him fidget. Fingers reaching out as if to take her own before pulling away again. She holds her own hands tightly balled into fists. This is not a conversation to evoke tenderness.

Rey, please.

The entreat comes to her through the Force. Not in words, directly, but the feeling of words. Like an imprint. Surprise overrides anger as her attention snaps back to Kylo. He holds her in place with steady, solemn eyes.

"This is why I need you at my side," he says softly. So softly, the words are barely more than the exhalation of air.

"Stop." Rey pulls back, "I don't want to hear this again."

He recoils. "You still don't trust me, do you?"

A scattering of retorts come to Rey's mind and dissipate before she can form them on her tongue. A part of her yearns to say yes, she trusts him, even though it makes no sense to do so. The rest holds against such recklessness; reminding her that while he continues to parade himself as Kylo Ren, this man is her enemy. Regardless of whatever mutual adversary they might currently work against.

It's an ever-revolving argument in her head that she feels will never have a resolution. So she stares out the viewport and says nothing.

"Rey." Impatience frays at the edge of Kylo's voice. "I've known your location from the moment you fled Crait. I knew when you were on Kashyyyk. I knew when you were on Ahch-To. Your presence is like a beacon in the Force - you can't hide from me."

It's the raw ache in his voice that catches her. She turns, meeting wide brown eyes that soften as she casts her gaze upon them. But then he has to go and open his stupid mouth again.

"More so, I know exactly where your precious Resistance are hiding - right this moment."

"You're bluffing." Rey holds her voice steady, wishing he would just stop. Stop with the talking. Stop with the eyes.

"Ajan Kloss," Kylo continues, relentless.

"But I've never been there…" She flinches with sudden understanding. "You've been inside my head."

Anger makes her voice tremble; which makes her angrier still. Distantly she wonders how much of it she can hold within herself before her seams split.

"No. I guessed some time ago." There's a twitch to the corners of his lips. The tug of a smile, if it can be believed. "Your reaction just confirmed my suspicion - you really should stop doing that."

"That's impossible. Out of all the potential planets in the galaxy. How could you possibly guess that one?" Rey's mind spins. Did he pluck this information from her while she was sleeping? Has he already informed the First Order? Is their current predicament all a ruse so he can stall for time as his Star Destroyer enters the stratosphere of the jungle planet to launch an attack -

"Ajan Kloss belongs to my mother." Kylo catches her thoughts; trapping them as surely as he folds her tightly clenched fists within his hands. "It became an Alderaan stronghold before the galactic civil war. I started my Jedi training there, in fact. So it wasn't actually a difficult conclusion to draw."

She chews on his words. It explains a few things about Leia's nostalgia for the planet. "Alright."

"If I was going to annihilate the Resistance, I would've done it by now." His gaze is steady, searching. "Please, Rey…"

"Okay." She swallows thickly, the panic in her chest tampering somewhat.

He nods, his face relaxing into relief. "Every single time Hux has come close to sniffing you out - and he has - I've sent him off the trail. Don't you see? This is why the First Order must know I'm alive - why I must continue to be in control. For now."

For now. Yeah, right, she thinks.

It's going to take three standard days for Kylo's shuttle to reach them.

There's a bitter kind of mirth in his voice when he relays to Rey his initial communication with the First Order. General Hux was less than pleased to find out the role of Supreme Leader had not been vacated after all, but with three other First Order generals patched through to the holo transmission, he could hardly protest. Instead, he could only return a grudging promise to make the necessary arrangements while grinding out thin gratitude for the serendipity of the Supreme Leader's survival.

A part of Rey feels an odd ache in her chest as she listens to Kylo's narration. She can see through his facade. The hatred he and Hux share with each other is probably the closest his adult self has come to knowing friendship. In that respect, it makes her former business relationship with Unkar Plutt seem a warm and tender thing.

"I need to check in with Finn." She blurts when silence falls between them long enough for her to consider the predicament they're in.

"You need to check in with -" Kylo tries to repeat her statement in his typically deadpan manner, but the ex-stormtrooper's name seems to form a blockage in his throat.

"He'll be expecting an update." Rey continues, perhaps a little too defensively.

"What is he, your father now?" he snaps, ignoring the sudden stunned look on her face. "Or is he your…"

Whatever Kylo intends to say next sticks even more in his throat, and she watches in odd fascination as his face contorts with a volley of emotions before settling once more into a mask of something that resembles calm.

"Never mind," he mutters finally, pushing himself to his feet. "Just don't disclose our location."

The look he gives her before he turns away fills her with a strange sad ache. And then he's gone. Striding off down the corridor with heavy footsteps that rattle an echo right to the very base of her stomach.

He's jealous of her friendship with Finn, she realizes with sudden clarity.

For a long time after Kylo has left, she remains in the Falcon's cockpit; staring out at distant stars that seem to hang suspended in space. She feels as if a cavity has suddenly opened up within her chest, leaving behind something hollow and aching. And when she finally reaches for the comm, it's with the heaviness of knowing that no matter what happens when this mission is over - no matter what side Kylo Ren falls to - she's going to lose someone she cares for, regardless.

Another author note: Don't dig too deep into my reason for the Falcon to be cast adrift in space - canonically, the ship has flown without a functioning rectenna, but I decided deep space with no sensors is a hazard. So maybe someone installed a kill switch for safety purposes after the last time the dang thing got knocked off.

Anyways, Rey and Kylo (cause he's not quite ready for Ben yet) have a couple of days up their sleeves to chillax in deep space. Maybe yell at each other some more. Have a food fight. A deep meaningful heart to hearts... The sharing of childhood experiences. The sharing of some other kind of experience. Who knows? If anyone has any suggestions on what they'd like to read, I'm all ears.