Chapter 43: Death

Nessie's POV

I sat down on the bench crying. I couldn't be around my family right now. After I'd lead Lucy to them I had left. I couldn't stand to be around the immense sadness of my family. Especially knowing that there was nothing I could do. I was dead. Gone. History. Just like that. Now here I was as a wondering spirit.

I looked by at all the people passing. I hated seeing people avoid me at all costs before. Now I would do anything to have that back. Because it would mean that I was alive again. I saw a woman looking in my direction across the street. But it must've been my imagination.

A few more tears fell down my face. I didn't know what to do anymore. I just wanted to be with my family. I wanted to feel my mother's and father's loving embrace again. I wanted my brothers to annoy the hell out of me. I wanted everything that I wouldn't be able to have again.

"You're new aren't you?" I was startled when I heard someone speaking to me. I looked up to see that same woman I had seen looking at me from across the street. "I can tell you're new. Breaks my heart when it's a kid like you though. It should never be a kid,"

"You can see me?" I asked her. Not quite understanding what was going on.

"My name is Sandra. Yes I can see you. I'm like you that's why we can see each other. What's your name kid?"

"Renesmee. Nessie," I sniffed.

"Oh your the girl everybody's been talking about. The hybrid girl,"

"Yeah that would be me," I chuckled sadly. "Is there a lot of us?"

"Kid you'd be surprised how many ghosts there are in the world. We're everywhere you just don't see us," the thought of what she said made me shudder. "Don't worry though we're all good people. Bad people don't have a choice. You see when you die God judges you right away. If you're good you will be called to heaven but you can remain if you choose to do so. If you're bad demons from hell will come and claim your soul immediately. Trust me it's not a pleasant sight,"

"But why choose to stay?" I asked her just to stop talking about hell already. It seriously scared the hell out of me. Pun intended.

"Well why did you choose to stay?" she questioned me.

"Because I don't want to leave my family. I'm not ready yet,"

"Unfinished business," she said. "Most of us have Unfinished business,"

"Like what?"

She smiled at me. "You really are a curious girl aren't you? I will use myself as an example. I died in childbirth six birth months ago. My husband died a few months before that from cancer. He crossed over immediately. My family doesn't want to take care of my son so he ended up in foster care. With some people who don't even care about kids. Before I cross over I want to make sure that he has a loving family who will love him just as much as I do,"

"But is there anything we can do to control that kind of stuff when we're dead?"

"You'd be surprised Nessie," she said. "Anyway why don't you come with me? You shouldn't be alone right now,"

"Is there any chance that I can live again?" I tried my hardest not to sound hopeful.

She smiled at me sadly but didn't say anything.

"Impossible I know," I cried.

"No," she shook her head. "Extremely rare but not unheard of. There are times when God will reverse death but it hardly ever happens. It's more of a legend than anything. Don't get your hopes up kid. The sooner you accept it the better,"

I decided to go with her. She was the only company I had at the moment. The only one who could see me besides Lucy. I smiled when I thought of the little girl. When I had returned to the spot where I...died...my family was long gone. Somehow I knew where to go though. Call it some spiritual force I guess. My family had rented a house on the outskirts of town. Needless to say my family was extremely confused at the sight of a little human girl on their doorstep but even in the midst of their grief they took her in without question. Hopefully she would bring them some smiles since I never could.

"You okay Nessie? I know that this is a lot to take in. Adjusting to death is difficult for everyone...especially kids," she sobbed. "This should never happen to kids. How old are you?"

"Eleven," I answered.

"So young," she muttered.

"Do you miss being alive?" I asked her. "I mean if you could change things to prevent your death would you?"

"No," she answered immediately.

"Why not?"

"Because I gave my life so my son could live. The doctors told me that they might not be able to save us both so I told them if it came down to it save my son. I will never regret that decision. But I won't be able to rest in piece until I know that he will be okay. That he will be loved and taken care of,"

"This really is a lot to take in," I said. "I know that it's happened but my brain just can't seem to accept it,"

She looked at me with immense grief and sadness. She did not say anything but words didn't need to be spoken. I looked ahead and suddenly spotted Alec walking right by me. What shocked me even more was that he was carrying flowers, balloons, a bear, and chocolate. He also had a giant card that read I'm Sorry on it.

"I hope she forgives me," he said. "I'm going to tell her that I love her. She needs to know that,"

It was then that I realized I loved Alec to. But I would never be able to tell him. How was he going to react when he found out what happened to me? I started crying again.

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