I'm alive! I still exist!

Awh, man, you guys. I'm so sorry. Maybe the best way I can explain myself is, I'm not a good multitasker. And when I'm spending 6-10 hours a day studying, nearly every day of the week, for months on end, I find that when I finally have some free time it's difficult to muster the energy to write. I can't tell you how many times I've written and rewritten some of the upcoming scenes, and how close I've come to just giving up... But I can't be a quitter. I love my story, flaws and all, and I want to see it completed.

My solution to my lack of motivation was to not work on ANY studies this week and see if that helped. I vegged for a whole day, working on the Lakebed Temple dungeon in Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess (I passed it! That was stupidly tedious and challenging) and reading Zarla's Handplates, Mercyplates, and other various Undertale comics. After that I felt much better and decided to test the waters in TG again.

I'm not going to promise regular updates from here on out, but I reaaally want to, if I can. I've been working on 138 over the past several months (blehh), and I'm working on 139 today. I want to see how much I can get done before New Years, because after that I need to dive back into studies again... If I can get the first draft of each chapter completed before I have to get back into studies, then that will make consistent updates easier.

Without further adieu, here's chapter 137, at long last! I hope this makes up for my disappearance and general crappyness (what? not a word? see how much I care) when it comes to dealing with the finale of this story.

Homecoming

Kai anxiously surveyed the coastline through his spyglass. The deck rocked beneath his feet, but after seven full days aboard the Lord's Compass he had become accustomed to the steady, rolling movement. From this distance, the North was little more than a stark white line on the horizon.

The weather had remained good throughout their journey, despite their concerns regarding winter monsoons and, as they approached the east, blizzards. It had been windy yesterday, sparking some uneasiness among the crew, but today all was calm.

So slow! Kai sighed, releasing a plume of misty vapor, and lowered the spyglass. The deep breath made his ribs ache. He did not care.

What if they were too late? He had left the West before his injuries had fully healed from the fateful day of Overlord's demise: he should have waited for the full moon, let Ronin's healing Gem fix the remaining damage before returning home. But there had been no time. Kai and Cole needed to go as quickly as possible.

Men murmured across the deck. Kai turned: several former stone warriors stood in a group, shivering. They each wore several layers of clothing, and had wrapped torn blankets around their heads in place of proper hats to ward off the bitter cold.

Perhaps if they'd had more time, they could have made clothing more suitable to Ninjago's winter weather. But the hasty- and frustratingly vague- message Cyrus had sent via Bird forced Kai to abandon any such preparations.

Information is difficult to come by these days, I'm afraid, Cyrus had written. Especially with this storm… I fear what may happen when the weather clears. With no apparent leader in the South, and the King threatening to invade at any time… There may be no good way to resolve this mess.

No apparent leader in the South. That phrase shook Kai's heart. He raised the spyglass to his eye again. The metal was cold. Land seemed no closer than before.

I've already lost Nya, Kai thought. And I never saw Father again after our…my…argument at the White Rose. Hosts, and Mother is expecting a child! If something happened to them…

There was another noise- one of a cane hitting the deck- and Kai hastily collapsed his spyglass. He folded his arms and rested against the deck's railings.

"Staring through that glass isn't going to make the ship move any faster," said Cole, leaning heavily on his cane as he walked up to the railing. Some days the pain was negligible enough that he could go without the cane. Today was not one of those days.

"I know," Kai said. "I just…I can't help it." He frowned at Cole's attire. Just a cloak over his thin Western clothes, no covering for his head or hands. "It's freezing up here. The deck is slippery. You-"

"Should be in bed, I know." Despite what he'd told Kai about the spyglass, he snatched it from Kai's hand and opened it, examining the distant coastline. He did not speak for a long while. His jaw tightened, letting slip the uneasiness that he always tried to keep hidden.

"It'll be at least another two hours," Cole finally said, and handed the spyglass back to Kai. "Which is what the captain already told us."

Kai grunted. The naked eye could not yet see the Northern coast, but that didn't keep him from squinting as he tried.

"Kai," Cole said firmly. "You shouldn't be out here."

"I've been in my cabin for too long now," Kai said, turning his face to the wind. Despite its chill, he appreciated how it felt as it blew over him. It felt like home. He just wished that Besai was here, too. But with the way Cyrus had spoken, Ninjago was clearly not safe enough for him to bring her home yet. Cole had left most of his family behind, too. Only Lou had accompanied him back east.

It was quiet. It was tense. And it was stressful: on top of not knowing exactly how bad the situation in Ninjago was, the Lord's Compass was not in peak condition after over fifteen winters of disuse. It was a miracle that they- meaning previously Transformed Western sailors- had gotten the old thing seaworthy as fast as they had. This entire journey had been tainted by an underlying fear that something would go wrong, and the ship would leave them stranded hundreds of miles from shore, at the mercy of the winds. Or worse.

"Kai." Cole raised his arm to touch Kai's. His expression was firm, but also sympathetic. "What good would it do anybody for you to come all this way just to die from cold? You're not dressed for this; come back down."

Kai hated being below deck. Yes, it was slightly warmer, if only because there was no wind. But it also smelled of too many bodies that had been living in the same enclosure for too long- they had nearly a hundred passengers on board, Ninjagians desperate to return home despite being warned that there might not be a home to return to.

And then there was the lack of windows. The artificial light of the lanterns, which seemed to create more shadows than they dispelled…

Kai shivered.

"Kai…" Cole's hand closed a little more firmly around Kai's arm. Nonetheless, his grip was weak. Would it ever improve? Perhaps a little bit. But it was likely that Cole would be forever crippled, at least to some degree, by his injury. The thought only dragged Kai deeper into his gloom.

"I can't do this anymore," he said, looking into Cole's eyes, shaking his head. "We just saved the West. And now we have to save our home, too?"

"We don't know that for sure," Cole said. "It's been two weeks since Cyrus wrote that message. A lot could have changed."

"Oh, I don't doubt it," Kai agreed. "But have things changed for the better? Or…" He pressed his lips together, overcome with emotion. "I'm so tired, Cole…"

Cole's silence bespoke his understanding and agreement. They looked over the ocean together for a time, watching the icy, choppy water crash against the ship's hull. Behind them, the captain of the ship appeared from below deck to give orders to the crew. It was time to make the final preparations before they landed.

Their destination was not Sheshin Port, as Kai would have desired. They had to go to Cyrus' base in the far North first, to get a better idea of what had been happening in Ninjago since they were away.

I wonder if Cyrus was able to fix Kyle, Kai mused. Kyle's chip- his mind, in a sense- had been retrieved from his body before his burial so many weeks ago. Jay had sent that chip to Cyrus along with their letter announcing Overlord's defeat.

Thinking of Overlord dredged up a lot of complex emotions within Kai. Hatred. He hated that monster for everything it had done, not only to him, or to Besai, but to the entire world. Kai couldn't help but feel a deep melancholy, too, as he reflected on all that had been lost as a result of Overlord's cruelty. Not only in these past fifteen winters, but also throughout the centuries.

There was a tremble in Kai's bones as images of his own time with Overlord- suppressed flashes of sights, smells, physical sensations- darkened his thoughts. Even today, after being freed by the God of the Way, Kai's heart shuddered when he unwillingly looked back on these memories.

Cole must have seen some change in Kai's expression, because his brows furrowed as he regarded his friend. He readjusted his grip on his cane, turned, and made a small gesture with his hand. Let's go.

Without a word, and with heavy hearts, the two men retreated below deck to await their arrival at a country which, for all they knew, might not be there any longer.

Aaaaaaaah! I can't even begin to express how refreshing this was to write, even if it is a little more on the solemn side of the spectrum. Kai is one of my besties. That's weird to say, but it's true. I have a soft spot for that guy, and nothing in TG makes me happier than writing in his PoV. Part of the reason I've been in the trenches with this story is because of his absence. I think he finally saw how much it was hurting my soul, and he told me it was time to come home. Just in time for Christmas, too. I love this guy.

A huge thanks to my dear friend EMB, who spent like three hours the other day helping me hash out complicated plot details (which somehow included some math?) and worked wonders for helping me get my motivation back.

Reviews are the gifts under my tree. :) If you feel so inclined, please leave a little one in that nifty box below. I don't want you to feel like your arm's getting twisted, but they truly do help me get a feel for how I'm doing.

I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas. And a Happy New Year as well, if I don't see you all before then.