a/n: Hi everyone! I hope you enjoy this chapter. I know lots of you want to know what happened the night Tris and Tobias broke up, and I hope for it to be in the next chapter or the one after. Thank you for all your support, and please let me know what you think of this chapter. Side note, there are some quotes from the original book, and I, in no way own those, Veronica Roth does. :)
I couldn't have do this without Eunice339! Thank you for your time, and all your hard work for making this chapter the best it can be! You are truly amazing!
|Chapter 17: Unresponsive|
Eight years ago...
"Are you okay? You look a little pale?" Tobias stares up at the spinning wheel of death that he believes will inevitably lead to his demise.
"Mhm…" He presses his lips together and hums. His fists clench and unclench several times, ridding him of any color at all in his hands.
"Hey," Tris takes hold of his hand and flattens it out in hers. "What's wrong? You can tell me anything, you know."
"Nothing, I'm fine," Tobias grits out. "Don't worry about me. Look, we're almost to the front of the line. Come on." Tris makes a weird squeaking noise when Tobias pulls her forward by the arm towards the front of the line.
Tobias had finally gotten the nerve to introduce himself to the beautiful blonde two weeks ago, and already they have spent quite a bit of time with one another, but this is their first official date and he wasn't going to spoil it by denying her something she had obviously been excited to do.
"So, tell me more about yourself," Tobias says, trying to distract himself.
"What else is there to know? I'm a college student at Caltech. I'm eighteen, blonde, short, and I like action movies, specifically action movies with Chris Evans," she says looking directly at him.
"Well, obviously there has to be more to you than that. I refuse to believe you're just some ordinary Chris Evans fangirl," Tobias tells Tris, a smile making its may up his face as he adds, "I think you're pretty special."
"And what makes you say that?"
"I don't know. There is something about you, Tris Prior, that intrigues me. You're like a puzzle. There are so many pieces to you that I can't figure out yet, but I will. I promise you one day I will fit all of those pieces together." In many ways, his words excite her. She's surprised at how he has opened himself up to her so quickly and honestly these last couple of weeks. She has never felt such a strong pull towards a man before, and she hopes that he'll stick with her for a very long time.
Tris smiles widely and pulls him forward, giving him a hug. "I look forward to that day."
The two of them finally get into the Ferris wheel gondola after waiting for a while. Tobias becomes tense the moment he steps inside. The muscles in his neck and shoulders stiffen and his jaw tenses up. His fist clenches and unclenches every few moments as he grips onto the railing to steady himself.
"Are you sure you're all right, Four?" She places a hand on top of one of his. His breathing is ragged and the movement of them climbing higher and higher does not ease his anxiety at all.
The moment Tobias' gaze shoots downward, he shuts his eyes immediately and laughs nervously, "Are you even human Tris, you know, being up this high?"
"What are you–" Tris begins, but it's like a light bulb has finally switched on in her head, "You're afraid of heights. Why didn't you tell me? I wouldn't have dragged you all the way up here if you had told me. Sorry, no pun intended. Oh my lord! What are we going to...hey, hey. Hey, Four, look at me. Keep your eyes on me. You see them?" Both of her hands grab onto either side of his face, forcing him to look at her.
For a moment he forgets his fear as a feeling of warmth replaces all the anxiety. She smiles at him and gradually his firm mask disappears. She takes one of his hands and places it to her chest, right over her breast where her heart is. "Feel my heartbeat. Can you feel it?"
He lets out a chuckle. "Yes."
"Feel how steady it is?" Tobias doesn't know if he should feel uncomfortable with how he just jumped straight to second base with Tris.
"It's fast." He doesn't know what else to say.
"Yeah, well, that has nothing to do with being trapped in a moving gondola and, you know, being up this high." She winces as soon as the words leave her mouth. She just admitted to something, and she only hopes that he didn't realize that.
But he does, and all of his worries seem to fly out the window, being replaced with some new level of confidence.
"Oh? So tell me, Tris," Tobias scoots closer to her so his lips are right next to her ear. "If it isn't being up this high, then why is your heart racing?" She knows the answer to that question, but does not want to admit it to him of all people. It's him. Something about him makes her feel like she is about to fall. Or turn to liquid. Or burst into flames. It's not easy realizing how vulnerable a man could make you feel.
"Well, it isn't the heights that scare me. Being this high makes me feel alive, like every organ and vessel and muscle in my body is just singing at the same pitch."
"Well, then," he thinks he has never smiled this much in his life before. "It's nice to know I can make a girl feel the same way as I do about her." His timing is perfect, because after the words leave his mouth their gondola finally returns back to the platform. He quickly gets off, thanking the heavens that he did not die, then turns to walk away quickly before Tris can say anything else, a smirk still lingering on his face.
"Wait! You can't just– Ugh! Hey, I'm talking to you, Four!" she calls after him, earning herself a few strange glances.
When she finally catches up to him, she forcefully pulls his arm, spinning him around to look at her. "You can't just admit to liking me, and then run off like that! That's not very fair on my part. I think you should apologize." Tris crosses her arms over her chest.
Tobias thinks she is joking at first, but he soon realizes she is very serious. He loves how she is trying to be intimidating, but it only makes her look even more adorable.
"So, apologize." She lifts a finger and taps her mouth.
Tobias' jaw drops slightly at her sudden boldness, his mouth shaped into an 'o', but it is quickly replaced with a knowing smirk. Despite his earlier confidence, his heart is racing as he bends down to her. She is very short, he notices, but his mouth eventually meets hers in a very slow but passionate kiss. Luckily, the two of them are standing in a secluded corner just near the food stands.
Tris rises up onto tiptoes for better access as her arms wrap around his neck to pull him closer. Her heart is pounding against her chest and fireworks are going off in her head. A pleasant shiver runs through her body when she feels his strong arms engulf her. His lips taste like cinnamon and mint, which seems like a strange combination, but she doesn't mind with his tongue massaging hers. Tobias realizes that Tris' lips feel so good, so right, against his and he wishes that he could kiss her forever.
They finally break apart, both slightly out of breath with smiles plastered onto their faces.
"Wow," she finally interrupts their moment of silence.
"Wow, indeed." Not only did he just have the best first kiss in his whole life, but Tris also let him touch her left breast – all within the span of an hour. I'm never going to let her go, he smiles to himself as he walks hand-in-hand with her back to his car.
Present day...
"I cannot believe that you are pregnant?" Tris paces back and forth as both Christina and Will stare at her. "What the fuck, man? Will, why couldn't you control your damn penis and, like, I don't know, not ejaculate into her?" She continues to ramble on as Will and Christina talk privately to one another.
"Do you think she's okay?" Will asks quietly.
"Yeah, don't worry about her, she's just in shock. And plus, she's good practice. My parents' reaction probably won't be as bad as hers."
"You're probably right," Will sighs.
"When am I ever wrong?" Christina says, earning a smile from Will.
"And you guys are going to need a bigger house. Oh, dear lord, I'm going to be an aunt! I'm not ready for this. This is all too much; I'm going to have a child to take care of now. Oh no! I–"
"Honey," Christina states calmly, "I'm the pregnant one, remember? Calm down, deep breaths, okay?" Christina puts both hands on either side of Tris' neck. "And I thought I was the talkative one of the two of us."
"But–"
"You need to chill, you're already an aunt, remember?" Tris tilts her head to the side. "In case you have forgotten, your brother, Caleb, has two children. You're going to be fine. Well, actually, I'm going to be fine. She's a perfectly healthy fetus growing inside me. Stop worrying, okay?"
"She?"
"Here we go again," Will mutters under his breath. "You know, statistically speaking, the pregnant person is the one with raging hormones. And no, the baby is obviously not a girl. Christina think it is, but I think the baby is going to be a boy."
"Oh really, William? And did you know, 'statistically speaking,' 1 in 8 pregnancies result in miscarriages? That's 12.5%!" Will's eyes widen in surprise at her sudden outburst.
"You okay, Christina? Do you need anything? Ice cream? Pickles? Isn't that what pregnant women crave?"
"Tris…" Chris begins, but Tris continues to ramble, "Beatrice, I'm fine. How are you feeling? What's going on?"
"Oh, me?" she questions pointing to herself. "Nothing is going on. I swear. I'm fine, just fine."
"Sweetie, you should know by now that I can spot a lie a mile away. You keep biting the inside of your cheek and don't get me started on how you keep looking at your phone every five seconds. What's going on?"
"Sorry. I, uh, I've been preoccupied lately. I'm trying to get my mind off things, and the moment that you told me you were pregnant... I just thought I could use the distraction, you know?" Tris sighs and rubs her face with her hands.
"Is this about Four?"
Tris is about to object, but then she sighs and says, "Yeah." Christina gives her a look asking her to elaborate. "I've been texting him lately, but he isn't replying back. I don't know if I did something wrong or not, but it's been seriously bugging the hell out of me." For the past week, Tris and Tobias have been exchanging texts between one another. Throughout those texts, Tobias has been hinting to Tris that he is interested in making their friendship something more, but Tris has been discretely declining. She knows that she likes him, but she isn't so sure if she's ready for something more right now.
A soft meow cuts her off from her thoughts. "Not now, Theo. I'm in a crisis."
"Tris, I think he's hungry," Chris responds.
"Will, not you too! Wait. Just shut up, I'm trying to think," Tris commands before he can even speak. Will just shakes his head and rubs his face with his hands.
"Fine, I'll feed him myself," he leaves to go to the kitchen to retrieves the cat's food.
"So, what's going on with you and Four," Christina asks Tris once Will is out of sight.
"I don't know. He's not responding to any of my messages. It's been almost twelve hours since I last texted him! I'm almost sure he's ignoring me or something," Tris responds.
"Honey, I doubt that. He probably hasn't even seen the messages yet. I'm sure he's just very busy," Christina tries to reason.
"I know that, but I'm sure he's ignoring me. See look!" Tris shows her the texts pointing out that right under her last message, it says 'Read at 7:49'. "You know what this means? He's seen the message, Christina! And the worst part is that he started to text back, I saw the little text box with the ellipsis, but then they disappeared! That's, like, the one thing that bothers me the most – when someone starts to respond, but then they don't! You know what I mean?"
"Hey, calm down. I'm sure it's nothing," Chris lies. "He'll get back to you. What did you even text him, anyways?"
"Don't laugh. Well, I had a lot of fun hanging out with him yesterday and I asked him if he wanted to do it again?" A smile spreads across Christina's face.
"Like a date?"
"What? No! I mean, yeah! Wait. I don't know! I just – I just want to spend time with him again. It's nothing serious, I promise." Tris shrugs.
"Honey, obviously, it means something. I know what Four did to you was unforgivable, but God forbid, I'm really glad that you two are mending your relationship. It's nice seeing you happy again after Robert."
"Thanks, Chris. But I don't know what's going to happen with Four. Maybe he has regrets?"
"Don't tell me you guys had sex..."
"No! Of course not! I'm just saying that maybe he doesn't want us to be together. Maybe he's realized that he doesn't want to be with someone as lame as me! I mean, look at me! I'm just a flat-chested, pale-skinned, scrawny, little girl! I mean, who in their right mind would want to be with me? I don't understand!"
"Don't say that," Christina hisses. "Anyone would be stupid to not find you attractive. Do you know what I see every time I look at you?" Tris remains silent. "I see someone who has gone through hell and back. I see someone who is both beautiful inside and out. Anyone would be lucky to have you, and I'm sure Four has realized that by now. So, I don't want to hear another word from you about all your insecurities. You're my best friend and I hate seeing how you constantly doubt yourself. And now that I'm having a baby girl, you better not say that again. Otherwise, all hell is going to break loose." Once Christina is finished speaking, Tris immediately embraces her friend.
"I'm so lucky to have someone like you in my life. I love you so much!" she admits.
"And I love you, too. Now you need to stop moping around, and go get your man. I mean, like, not right now, just give him some time. If he doesn't reply within the next twelve hours, then possibly something fishy is up. Not that there isn't already something going on, but just to be sure, you know.
"Yeah, I understand. Thanks, by the way."
There's a long pause of silence before Will walks back into the room. "Is anyone feeling in the mood for pizza?"
"This is it! This is the place, I swear!" Tobias runs up to the entrance waiting impatiently for Zeke as he slowly trails behind.
Tobias' heart pounds in his chest as he makes his way inside the place where it all began, when he cheated on Tris. After Zeke suggested to him that there may be a possibility that he was drugged, Tobias decided to drag his best friend along to investigate.
The bar is exactly how it looked like three years ago. There is the same worn out jukebox in the corner of the room and the same vomit stain on the wallpaper to the left side. The 'OPEN' sign is still broken with only the 'E' and 'N' lit up with LED lights. The overhead lights constantly flicker every minute or so, and everything about the bar screams the word 'unsanitary'.
"This is the place?" Zeke asks surprised that Tobias would ever think of coming to a place like this.
"Hi," Tobias walks up to a young bartender who looks like a grad student, firm mask planted on his face. "Does there happen to be a bartender with the name of Margaret, I believe?"
"Margaret? I'm sorry, but there isn't a Margaret that works here."
"What about Molly…or maybe Miriam? I can't remember exactly, but I could have sworn it started with an M…or maybe an N? Whatever, she's blonde, about this tall," Tobias motions with his hand to just below his chin. "She has brown eyes, I think."
"I'm sorry, man, there is no one that fits that profile. Do you know how long ago she worked here?"
"About three years ago."
"Sorry, man, I wouldn't know. I only started working here about a year ago. Sorry, I wasn't much help."
"It's fine," Tobias snaps, without meaning to. "Thank you for the help anyways," he adds with more control.
The man nods curtly and turns to walk away to the other side of the bar to the waiting customers.
"You think the woman you slept with already quit?" Zeke asks.
Tobias chooses to ignore the pain in his chest from Zeke's words. "It would seem so," he then releases a long sigh. "This was completely useless." Tobias kicks the wall beside them in frustration.
"Hey, calm down." Zeke places an arm to Tobias' shoulder and he relaxes a little.
"I know you must be frustrated, especially since you can barely remember what happened that night, but you need to relax. I'm not telling you to let it go, because I feel like something is sketchy about this, but yeah, like I said, don't stress too much. If anything, out of all the people I know, you will figure out what happened. You're stubborn and I know you won't give up without getting down to the root of the problem."
Tobias keeps quiet during Zeke's pep talk, absorbing what he was saying, before responding. "Thanks, man. I mean, for helping, actually well, for everything. I really appreciate your help." For a person like Tobias, who has only ever been open with his feelings to one other person in his life, the fact that he openly showed Zeke how grateful he felt causes Zeke to smile.
"Of course, anything for my best bud."
Tobias arrives home around six that evening and immediately collapses onto his couch, a feeling of frustration overtaking him since running into the dead end at the bar. It's making him doubt himself again and his feelings of insecurity are coming back to haunt him, too. Though he does not want to admit it out loud, he is not sure he should start something up with Tris again until he is certain that he knows what happened that night three years ago.
I should probably text her back, he says to himself. The minute he takes his phone out of his pocket, though, he stares at the screen blankly. Blinking, he has a mental debate about whether he should respond or not. He does, but instead of doing what his heart wants, logic and honor win out and he texts the one thing that will surely cause pain to both himself and Tris.
'Sorry, can't hang tonight. I've been thinking we should stop seeing one another for the time being. Lots of things going on. I'll be in touch. Sorry.'