For a moment Dean wasn't sure of himself or what he had heard. Sam wasn't looking at him, hadn't looked at him once while he spoke, Dean hadn't interupted him since he began; not wanting to stop him while he was talking.

When he swallowed hard, he tasted bile, forcing it down as he took a deep breath, running Sams words through his mind once more.

Listening to it a second time in his mind didn't make it any easier than hearing it the first time.

"Demon blood." he finally managed to say, his voice rough and coarse. When he saw that it made Sam flinch, he cleared his throat to try to speak clearly. "Demon blood."

Sam nodded, eyes firmly on the ground. "Demon blood." he said quietly. "I tried not to, I wanted to avoid it. But...like I said, when you get desperate, you're willing to throw a lot of morals out the window."

"What happened to get you desperate?" Dean asked, not sure if he really wanted to know the answer.

Sam didn't say anything but after a moment he got up and turned away from Dean so that his back was to him. He pulled his shirt off, throwing it to the couch, and immediately Dean saw the reason.

Along Sams back were a series of long scars that only hinted at how deep they had gone. They looked as if something had tried to reach into him and grab his spine for lack of a better way to describe it. There were five lines in total, all along his back that started at the base of his neck going down to the small of his back.

Without realizing that he had even moved Dean had gotten up, reaching out to gently touch the scars. Sam flinched back from his touch but otherwise didn't move. Despite being taller than Dean he was narrower as well, thin yet muscular. He knew that Sam was strong, he knew that his brother could take care of himself.

But seeing him like this, seeing his scars, seeing him bare like this, it almost felt like Sam was breakable and fragile, vulnerable in a way he'd never seen him.

"I don't think I have to say much about this." Sam said quietly, head bowed. "I think this part you can tell what happened."

Dean swallowed hard and nodded, bringing both hands up to place against Sams back, leaning forward until his forehead touched the top of the scars. "So then you started to drink demon blood?"

"Yeah." Sam whispered, barely audible. "And damn if it didn't work. Almost immediately my powers were amplified a hundred, a thousand times. Took some time to get them under control but," he held his hand out and his shirt shot into his hand from the couch. "But I got there."

"And you don't need the demon blood anymore?" Dean asked, hoping for a positive answer on that.

Sam didn't say anything as he stepped away from Dean enough to pull his shirt back on.

Feeling the pit growing in his stomach Dean straightened up, taking a deep breath. "Sam," he asked lowly. "What did you and Ruby do today?"

"Sex." Sam told him. "And more demon blood."

"You seem to be in good enough control of your powers right now, is that because of the blood or because of you?" Dean asked.

"Both, a lot of it comes from me just knowing how to use it. But at the same time, the demon blood doesn't hurt." Sam said, still not looking at him. "Its not really something I want to stop just yet anyway."

He really didn't like the implications of that last sentence.

"Its not something that you want to stop or its something that you can't stop?" Dean asked, feelings his fingers twitch.

Sam was quiet for a moment too long.

"Its addictive, isn't it?" Dean asked, taking a step closer to him. "Its a drug, Ruby's drugging you."

"Shes not drugging me, I'm the one taking it from her." Sam said, turning and going around to sit on the couch.

"And I'm sure she's more than willing to give you a dose." Dean said, turning with Sam. "So what? She comes into town for a day for a fuck and a liter of blood?"

"Its not like that." Sam tried to argue, sounding tired as hell. For a moment Dean felt bad at keeping him awake but at the same time, this needed to be talked about now.

"No she just strings you along. Demons aren't trustworthy, I've heard you say that yourself, but this Ruby is trustworthy, sure." Dean went on. "And obviously you're not going to get another dose of demon blood from just anywhere else but her. Meaning that she can tell you that the sky is green and grass is blue and you'd probably believe her if it meant she'd give you more."

"You don't know what you're talking about." Sam said, staring down at the ground.

"Sam, look at me already." Dean half exclaimed, just barely remembering to keep his voice down because of everyone else that was sleeping in the house. He came forward and grabbed Sams shoulder, pushing him back until his head came up and froze.

Sam was staring at him with tears in his eyes, shaking slightly. He closed his eyes and a tear rolled down his cheek, his hand coming up to roughly wipe at it with the heel.

"Sammy." Dean whispered before leaning forward and wrapping his arms around his little brother. Sam stiffened for a moment before his arms hesitantly came up to grip at him, the shaking starting to intensify. Dean moved enough to crawl onto the couch, tightening his grip around his brother, as he basically climbed onto his lap to hold him properly.

"I got you Sammy." he whispered to him. "I got you."

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