Ever had words rolling around in your mouth that just had to come out?

That's what this chapter was for me.

(You guys are the best. The BEST!)

Damon had sped from the room before he could prove or disprove Imran's words and Bonnie couldn't help but wonder why. They'd been so open about their newfound bond with one another that it wouldn't have taken much to say that they loved one another. Bonnie sighed as she looked to Amelia and Imran with a shake of her head and a muttered 'sorry' as she followed after Damon. Sniffing him out she walked right out the front of the house and saw him marching determinedly to the group of their friends that were enjoying the summer sun on the beach that was moments from the house.

"Elena!" Damon barked and Bonnie's eyes bulged, and she picked up her pace, "I need to talk to you."

"Damon!" Bonnie yelled, hoping to calm him down before it got out of hand, if he didn't want to admit that he loved her that was fine but she didn't like the feeling that was weighing on her chest as hurried after Damon – nothing good could come from him like this. "Damon, wait!" He spun around and looked ready to snap at her before he physically jerked backwards to stop himself. Pinching the bridge of his nose and pressing his eyes shut Damon drew in a breath.

"Bonnie, please," he said his voice barely stable, "I'll be with you in a second; there's just something I have to do." Elena jogged over with a frown on her face as she took in the tension between the two of them before eyes settled on Damon. She didn't know what it was but it was that silent exchange between Damon and Bonnie that irked her somewhat.

"You – you wanted to talk?" Elena began, folding her arms over her chest and Bonnie wanted to edge away but Elena's eyes landed on her. "No stay you two do everything together now anyways I hear, why stop now?" Bonnie's jaw dropped and Damon laughed darkly.

"Don't even go there with me," Damon hissed, stepping towards her, "I just have a few things to get off of my chest before Bonnie and I can figure out what's happening to us."

"…Sure." Elena said noncommittally and Bonnie almost smacked her forehead when she saw Damon's shoulders tense up and his hands ball at his sides.

"You erased our relationship," Damon began, his voice thick with emotion and Bonnie's heart contracted painfully – how could Elena have done such a thing? "You removed your love for me from your memory after four measly months." Elena swallowed uncomfortably along with Bonnie, who really wished she could inch away and flee to where Caroline and Enzo were standing… clearly eavesdropping. "And that's something that's been chewing at me since I got Bonnie back, since I've been back really, when I had moments where I remembered myself outside of her," he drew in a shuddering breath and blew it out, "You must have forgotten who you were dating, who you chose to love at the end of it all – me…a man who spent all his days mourning after a woman with the face in front of me right now, I waited for Katherine for longer than you've lived, a couple of times over and you couldn't hold out after four months?! I'm not a good person, I have very few redeeming qualities but I've never been a quitter and I've never been anything but loyal to the one I love, you'd think I'd have gotten that in return – the second time at least but no…you had to put another thing between us Elena and I…I'm done."

"…What?" She gasped.

"You heard me," Damon snapped, "Get the memories back or don't but I won't be there waiting when you've made your choice because I've made mine…for myself, for probably the first time in my life and it seems to working out a hell of a lot better than everything before." Damon looked to Bonnie quickly before he looked back to Elena, "All we've been doing since the day we met Elena is try to be something we're not…you're not good for me and I'm not good for you and I'm tired of pretending that ignoring that is enough for me, because it's not." Tears pooled in Elena's eyes and Damon growled. "Why are you crying Elena? You don't even remember anything!"

"I'm sorry!" She shouted in return and Bonnie flinched a little and took a step back.

"Are you? How could you possibly be sorry for something that you're still doing?" Damon snarled and turned and walked off leaving Elena and Bonnie gaping after him. Bonnie twitched, instinctively wanting to follow after him and she heard Elena laugh bitterly.

"Go on," Elena said waving a hand in the direction Damon had left in, "Run after him, he's your best friend now isn't he?" Bonnie's jaw clamped tight and she exhaled slowly and sharply as she looked at Elena, trying to find some inkling of the girl she'd killed herself trying to love and protect. Bonnie knew Elena was upset but that didn't justify her attitude.

"You're right," Bonnie said crossing her arms, "He is my best friend, because he wanted to send me back instead of himself, he was the only one to put me first for the first time in who knows how long and he reminded me of what love and friendship really is and hear me when I say this Elena …but it was because of you I seemed to have had forgotten what it was all about." Elena's mouth fell open. "A long time ago." Bonnie turned on her heel then and made her way back to Imran's house with a frazzled mind and a heavy heart.

"I literally never thought I'd see the day." Caroline whispered to Enzo, stepping closer to him unconsciously as she watched Bonnie leave, tapping the back of her hand against his chest, "You spent a while with Damon, did he ever get like this?"

"Honestly, ever since he got back without Bonnie he's been equal parts different and precisely the same as I remember…different in the way he conducts himself with matters of the heart, plus the whole hallucination thing but the same in that he's as fiery and volatile as always." Caroline nodded as she watched Elena stalk off to Stefan who'd been in a heated debate with Lucy and Fahada about geomancy in South Africa. "I'm just glad the nightmares stopped." Caroline looked at Enzo then and smiled.

"Me too." She said and laughed when he broke out into a grin.

"Damon," Bonnie said, having used unnatural speed to rush to the beach house and follow him via his scent. She found him in one of the wings, standing still in front of a post-modernist painting of a werewolf howling under a full luminescent moon. Bonnie huffed out a breath and walked slowly to him, being sure to keep a modicum of space between them when she reached him. "Damon?" He didn't turn when she called the second time so she gave up and stared at the painting hanging in front of them. Upon closer inspection she noticed that the werewolf's eyes shone a bright crimson and its canines were dripping with saliva and blood while its fur stood out in tufts of bronze stained with blood. The moon itself was the only 'peaceful' component of the image, with the ledge the wolf was standing on overlooking jagged rocks below that promised death as they shone in the moonlight. Bonnie continued to run her eyes over the painting as Damon's gaze fell to her face. She made sure to control her breathing but there was only so much she could do about her heart rate. She paid extra attention to the fine detailing used to paint the wolf's fur, noting that you could spot flecks of golds and browns if you stared long enough.

"Bonnie?" Damon's voice called to her, as soft as she'd ever heard it, but she didn't respond. He took a step closer to her then, sideways so that he still faced the painting, letting their shoulders brush past one another as he moved. "Bonnie look at me."

"No, it's so easy for you to refuse me when I ask you to talk…why am I even here right now?" She'd aimed the last bit to herself, not wanting to be privy to another one of Damon's blow-outs. She'd had plenty of them when they were in purgatory together and once today – enough for a lifetime if you asked her. He stepped in front of her then and gripped her chin with his hand, dipping his head so that they saw eye to eye. Green and blue meeting in more ways than one.

"I'm sorry." He said and Bonnie could admit that she liked how he was starting off, "I shouldn't have left in the middle of the meeting with Imran and Amelia but after the things he said…and the things he alluded to Stefan saying…I had to set the record straight."

"Are you done doing that?" Bonnie wondered, knowing he wasn't, she just wasn't sure how he planned to go about the rest of his apparent epiphanies.

"Nope." He said with a here and gone smile, "You're next on the list actually." Bonnie's heart thumped in protest. "Nothing bad I promise," Damon said upon hearing her body's reaction to his words, "Well, I suppose it depends on your definition of 'bad'."

"What should my definition of bad be?" Bonnie asked, pulling her chin out of his hold and crossing her arms. "Because if this is the part where you tell me what a terrible person you are then I hate to break it to you Damon, but I already knew that." Damon nodded with a wry smile.

"I know you do and we both know you saw the good in me despite that." Bonnie rolled her eyes.

"Because you are good Damon, you just insist on dedicating your life to proving otherwise because you think that's all your good for."

"Thought." He said simply and that brought her up short.

"Excuse me?" She replied.

"Thought," Damon repeated, "I thought it was all I was good for." Bonnie's mouth fell open in a silent 'oh'. "But now I know I was wrong, you showed me I was wrong."

"I did?" He nodded.

"I thought that being loved was about Elena choosing me or being better than Stefan or a whole host of other stupid things but I was wrong –"

"I could have told you that –"

"You tried, I'm sure," Damon conceded, "But I need you to keep your mouth shut for like, a minute, can you do that for me please?" Bonnie would have scowled and said no if he hadn't caught her off guard with his sudden use of good manners by saying 'please'. She nodded. He looked at her seriously, holding his breath for a moment, his eyes already imploring to understand and accept the words he was yet to say. "Bonnie… I think I'm in love with you, and I know," he said with his hands splayed out in front of him, "That the timing sucks and that you're probably still hung up on Jeremy or your newfound freedom or whatever but I think that when we died our old lives died along with us, like they should have years ago…I made decisions I hope you never forgive me for because I'm not sure I'll ever really deserve it… but one thing I'll never stop reminding you of is how grateful I am that you thought I was worthy enough to be saved and that I was worth your hope and love and effort and care…because let's face it, not once did I ever really try to be good to you, not until it was too late really but I want you to know that I'm trying now –"

"Damon –"

"And I won't stop trying," Damon went on as if she hadn't said anything, "I love you Bonnie and that's why it hurt so much when you put me in front of you, when I woke up without you repeatedly, my soul knew something my mind was yet to grasp… until you found your way back…back to me," He looked so sad and pained then, "Bonnie I love you, I'm in love with you." Her mouth hung open. "Why else did it hurt so much?" He asked, like she'd know, "Why else did you stay even after I left you behind? Why did you stay here," he pointed to his chest, his undead heart, his fingers digging into the skin angrily like he was willing it to beat for her, "You stayed here and there's a reason for that." Both of them gasped softly as they saw the other's eyes begin to glow after Damon spoke, like his words had ignited something in the both of them.

"Damon, I –"

"No," he said walking away from her backwards so their eyes were still locked, "Don't say anything. Let's figure out what's happening with us because of the 'bond' or whatever it is. The rest can wait." He used vampire speed to leave her standing there, one leg bent as she was about to walk to him. She knew he was only trying to protect himself from being rejected again but she would have said the words back, no matter how confused she really felt and maybe…maybe he had guessed that.

"…I love you too." She muttered anyway.

While I was writing this I was listening to "Monster" by Paramore and there was this one lyric that just stuck with me "Don't you ever wonder, how we survived?" and I could see Damon in my head asking Elena this over and over and her not having an answer…So that's how this chapter was made. Heh.

Stay excellent.