The sun was beginning to set by the time we finally returned to port, the harbor tinted red and gold by the sun's last rays. The fleet had begun to disembark the ship and move their own vessels back to their assigned docks. U-556 and Tirpitz were the last to leave, each stopping to say goodbye to Bismarck in their unique way, one enthusiastic and the other awkward and halting. As Bismarck brought the massive battleship into dock, we noticed something odd from the bridge, and I stepped out onto the starboard wing to get a better view.
Sure enough, a crowd had gathered at the pier, a collection of kansen from almost every fleet. I grabbed a pair of binoculars and scanned the crowd. Most were destroyers, a few cruisers, mainly from the Eagle Union(and surprisingly Sheffield), and the battleships Cesare and Littorio.
"We seem to be popular," I announced with a wry grin as I stepped back into the bridge.
Bismarck sighed softly and craned her neck to try and get a better look from her vantage point. "There's a crowd?" she asked, "Why is there a crowd?"
I shrugged. "Probably because you took out a fleet of Iron Blood ships without any warning and I left with you. That's bound to stir up the rumor mill." As soon as she opened her mouth to object, I quickly interjected with, "I'll do what I can to squash those rumors. Still, this'll probably make the rounds for at least a month."
Bismarck made a disgusted noise. "No good deed goes unpunished, I suppose."
"Guess not," I grinned.
Once the Bismarck was moored, and the gangplank had been extended, she and I departed the ship, with myself in the lead as per a last-second agreement. As expected, the second my feet hit the pier, I was swarmed with both girls and questions.
"Is it true, Commander?"
"Did you guys fight off a whole Siren base all by yourself?"
"I heard Bismarck sunk thirty battleships without even using her rigging!"
"Were you on a super-secret mission?"
"Do you think Bismarck's cute?" While I never found out who asked that last one, I remain fairly convinced it was Aoba, looking for a scoop for her paper.
"I'll be briefing all officers on a need to know basis, so for right now, I'm not answering any questions," I announced loudly, ensuring the entire crowd could hear me before I began shooing them away. "Now, it's late, we're tired, and I'm sure you have duties to attend to. Let's go, disperse. That includes you, Sheffield."
The Royal maid and spy shot me a dirty look before joining the rest of the departing group. I watched her go until I was certain she wasn't going to double back and try and eavesdrop on our conversation. Of course, the Royal Navy would get the same report about this trip as everyone else, but it was going to be through proper channels and paperwork. Not to mention I didn't want Sheffield overhearing anything of a personal nature between Bismarck and myself. Once they had departed, I let out a long, tired sigh and stretched before looking back at Bismarck.
"Looks like I'll be up late filing an initial report on this so I can have it ready for all the factions by morning," I sighed. "Will you want a copy of it as well?"
She shook her head, gazing back out at the harbor. "Nein. I think I have a fairly good memory, and I'll be going over the combat data from the ship as well as the reports of the other girls who were there. Once that's compiled, I will, of course, share that with you. But there is something I wanted to discuss, Herr Kommandant."
"Of course, I appreciate you keeping me in the loop" I nodded thankfully, "What did you want to discuss?"
Her eyes flicked over my shoulder, at the departing Sheffield. "I was hoping we could discuss things in your office, where it's a little less...open."
She made a good point, we probably shouldn't be discussing anything sensitive out on a pier. "Right. To the office, then. I'll put on a pot of coffee and we'll get started on all the fun paperwork."
Fresh cups of coffee in hand, we sat down at my desk and began drawing up the paperwork needed for our respective reports. Once we were fully situated, I looked over at Bismarck and asked, "So what is it you wanted to discuss?"
Before answering, she took a sip of the coffee and cleared her throat. "The matter of the destroyed Siren base. I would like to be able to search through the ruins for any intact Siren technology or intelligence regarding their upcoming plans."
I leaned back in my seat and thought it over for a few moments before answering her. "For starters, this is all going to be contingent upon a few things. I'm going to need permission from High Command to go and try and salvage anything from there. And we're going to have to make sure the area is secure enough for us to do any sort of prolonged salvage. And if either of those isn't going to be achievable, I'm going to have Hornet carpet bomb the whole thing out of existence. If, and that's a big 'if', those prerequisites are achievable, then yes, I'll allow you to go and rifle through there, on several conditions."
Bismarck looked somewhat displeased but nodded in agreement all the same. "And what might those conditions be?"
"That any Siren tech that you return is kept under lock and key at the research academy and any data you uncover is shared equally with the other members of Azur Lane. Oh, and each faction will be able to send a ship to do their own research."
She leaned back in her chair and folded her arms across her chest, the frown deepening. "What if they get in my way?"
"What if you get in theirs?" I countered and she immediately stiffened. I quietly wondered if I had gone too far again and waited for her reaction.
"I would never!" she protested. "I have been studying Siren tech for years, some of these nations wouldn't even touch it until recently. I don't want a promising find ruined because some Royal Navy maid spills her tea over it!"
"Perhaps you could teach some of these newcomers how to properly conduct field research?"
Her jaw worked up and down for a moment as she tried to come up with counter-argument and failed. Eventually, she relented and with a wave of her hand said, "Alright, fine. If we go, I will teach them the proper ways to do research."
I smiled and nodded graciously. "Thank you. I'm glad we could come to a mutually beneficial arrangement. Assuming we get permission to do this."
"What do you think the chances are of High Command approving?"
I shrugged. "Hard to say, but they tend to be leery of Siren tech. They've seen what can happen when it's used on Kansen and they don't want it to happen here."
"What happened to me, you mean," she corrected, her expression melancholic and shameful.
My heart went out to her at that moment, seeing the pain and guilt on her face. "There were...other incidents, but yes, I think what happened to you is something of a worst-case scenario. And I think they're afraid that the next Kansen won't have the presence of mind or sheer willpower you did to reject it."
"I let a moment of weakness define me for generations," she spat bitterly. "And they are right to fear such power. It worms its way into your soul and corrupts you from within."
"Then why do you still perform research on Siren tech?"
"Because I know first-hand how powerful they can be, how much damage they can truly do. Perhaps we cannot use their weapons as our own, but if we can reverse engineer something to equalize their advantage, we have a chance to win this war. If we corner them, the way I was cornered…" she shook her head before meeting my gaze. A chill ran up my spine at what I saw in her eyes. "...they will not hold back. And as we are now, we will not stand against their fury."
A wave of futility and helplessness washed over me. I was beginning to see why Graf Zeppelin was such a nihilist. "Then...if they've had the power to destroy us, why haven't they used it? Why didn't they use it the first time we drove them off?"
"I'm...not sure," Bismarck shrugged, suddenly looking very tired. "It's a question that has kept me up many nights. From what I remember from my...demise...they were using me as some sort of test. Perhaps we are nothing more than some sort of experiment to them."
"That's an unsettling thought." There was an awkward silence, a question that was going unasked or unanswered by either of us. I decided to best broach the subject directly, but carefully. In a soft voice, I asked: "Can you still hear it?"
Bismarck looked surprised at the question and I could see in her eyes that she knew immediately what I was talking about. But she continued to play coy, trying to draw out what I knew. "Hear what?"
"The scherzo." I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, steadying myself for whatever response I was about to receive. "It's in the after-action reports filed by Rodney and King George V. 'An endless scherzo', I believe you called it. The darkness of the Sirens' weapons upon your cube."
That awkward silence became an uncomfortable one now, hanging heavy in the air like a pall of smoke. A thousand questions raced through my mind. Would she answer? If she did, what would I do with such an answer? Who else knows? Finally, she spoke, her voice so meek and quiet I wouldn't have believed it had come from Bismarck had she not been sitting right in front of me. "Sometimes."
The air seemed to change, becoming heavy and serious. We were entering dangerous territory, and I should tread lightly here. But I had to know. I leaned forward, keeping my voice soft as I spoke. "How often?"
"When I am at rest. When I have nothing to do. When there is nothing but the silence of the outside world, I can hear it, still playing softly in the back of my mind," she answered as she looked away, trying to hide her face from me.
It suddenly made sense now. "That's why you don't relax," I said, putting the pieces together. "You're afraid if you let your guard down long enough, if you stop being the leader of the Iron Blood and just...be yourself, that you'll be consumed by the scherzo again. That's it, isn't it?"
"...yes." She tried to turn away further, but the high seat back prevented her.
"Have you ever talked to anyone about this?"
She whipped back around, and I could see the tears coursing down her cheeks, her expression had gone from melancholy to rage in a heartbeat. "Und who would I talk to?" she snapped. "Who could I have talked to? I am the leader of the Iron Blood, the embodiment of my people! Who would negotiate with me knowing the madness that lies in my soul? How could I hope to protect a people who would recoil from me in horror?"
She wasn't wrong. If word of this got out, it would torpedo any credibility and authority she had, and Tirpitz, the closest the Iron Blood had to a successor, was still too isolated and aloof to calm frazzled nerves and quell any unrest. The Iron Blood would quickly collapse and Azur Lane would suffer greatly for it. But all that was secondary right now. For me, the most important thing is that I didn't want to see Bismarck in such pain and anguish.
"I'm here now," I volunteered. "You can talk to me about it."
She stared at me as though I had suddenly grown a second head. "...why?"
I smiled softly back at her. "Because I care about you, and because this seems like something important that you need to talk about. Normally, I'd recommend Bremerton, but if you're worried about this getting out, or that the other Kansen will somehow see you as lesser, then I'm willing to do anything I can to help."
"What makes you think you can help at all?" she spat.
"Nothing," I admitted. "I don't know if there's anything I can do. But what I do know is that I can't sit here and watch you wrestle with this...this darkness by yourself."
Her long hair swayed back and forth as she vehemently shook her head, "This is my struggle. I don't want to see you get hurt."
"I appreciate your concern, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not budging on this, Bismarck. I'm here for you."
She lowered her head, the brim of her cap again masking her face from view. "Until you see the darkness inside, until you hear the scherzo. Nobody's ever stayed with me after that."
I fought back the urge to bark out a harsh laugh, instead smiling sadly and shaking my head. "The only people who ever heard you say that were hunting you down to destroy you after you destroyed a close friend of theirs. Nothing you would have said would have made friends out of them at that moment."
And then she dropped a bombshell. "..there is more. When I was...dying...a Siren, the Observer, I think, said something to me. She was going to give me one more chance, to dance one more time, to use their power and reshape the world. If I could transcend my limitations and become one with my 'alter ego', I would get the answers I sought."
The chair rattled as I slumped back into it, stunned. This had never come up in the reports, nobody had ever mentioned anything like this ever happening before. Even those who were defeated and brought back-Hood, Akagi, Scharnhorst, Soryu, not one of them mentioned being contacted by a Siren in the moment of their death. I struggled to find my voice, to ask the next question. "W-...what were the answers you were seeking?"
"If the Iron Blood would be kept safe, that they would be spared the pain and humiliation of defeat again."
A fair and noble request, one I would expect from the Bismarck I've come to know. "And this 'alter ego'?"
She shrugged helplessly, looking up at me with earnest eyes. "I don't know. I don't know if it's the unstoppable beast they tried to bring out in me, the madwoman who had forsaken all honor and sanity for sheer power. But I'm afraid it may be."
At last, the pieces all fell into place. "So you're afraid that the stronger you become, the closer you come to reaching your full potential, the greater chance you will become the Sirens' tool once more. And if you stay hidden, if you simply bury yourself in administrative work, in research, you won't grow in power. Until you've found what it is you're looking for from the Sirens-a way to stop this from happening."
She nodded, her voice a whisper. "..yes."
"I see." I leaned forward again, trying to peer beneath the brim of her cap to see her face. "While I certainly understand your fears, there's nothing in what you said that would preclude me from helping you. Or even just talking about it. You don't have to suffer through this alone. I'm here for you."
She stayed quiet, still looking down and not meeting my attempts to look her in the eye. After a few long seconds that felt like hours, I quietly sighed and stood up. The sound of my chair rolling along the hardwood floor brought her head up, and she stared at me quizzically as I walked to the front of my desk.
"Was...was machst du?" She asked, and while my German has since made vast improvements, at the time, I only understood the first word, "what", and gambled(correctly) that she was asking what I was doing.
"Trying to look you in the eyes," I answered honestly. "I want you to understand that you are safe here."
She quickly rose out of her chair, exclaiming in German, "Nein! Bleib weg von mir!" She pointed a gloved finger at me as she beat a hasty retreat towards the door. "S-stay away!" she repeated in English, "Just...stay away."
"Bismarck," I began to plead with her, but it was too late, she was out the door before I could say anything else. It slammed shut behind her with such force I could hear it echoing down the empty halls. Frustration welled up inside of me and I admit what I did next was extremely stupid. But, in my defense, it had been a very long, very stressful day and I was out of options.
I stomped over to the door, threw it open, and stepped out into the hallway. Bismarck was still marching away, either unaware that I had followed her or deliberately ignoring me. In any case, I needed to get her attention. So I took a deep breath and shouted down the hall, "I never took the mighty Bismarck to be a coward!" There. The die had been cast, now let's see where it lands.
Bismarck came to an immediate halt, and even from this distance, I could see her entire body go rigid. She slowly turned around to face me, her face a mask of barely-contained rage. Her response was a simple one-word question. "Was?"
I felt a sudden and overwhelming urge to fall to my knees and apologize profusely, that I didn't mean it, that it was all a mistake. But I knew that would be the wrong thing to do. I'd made my choice, and now there was nothing to do besides see it through. I mustered up my courage and did my best to keep my voice from shaking. "You heard me!" I shouted back. "I never took the mighty Bismarck, the pride of the Iron Blood, to be a simple coward! One sign of trouble and she runs back to her little hole where the rest of the mean ol' world can't hurt her!"
"Stop it," she said, her voice growling down the corridor as she began to march back towards me.
"Make me," I shot back, standing my ground. "If you've got the stomach for it."
Faster than I had expected, she had crossed the distance between us and slammed me up against the wall, knocking the wind out of me. Before I could recover, I felt myself sliding up it and my feet leaving the floor, dangling in the air. It was at that moment that I wondered if I had made a fatal mistake. When she didn't immediately hurl me out the nearby window, I relaxed somewhat, and I have to stress "somewhat". Her eyes blazed with a fury I'd never seen from her before, and she looked as though she were getting ready to snap me in half.
"How dare you, you...you...schweinehund! What gives you the right to even think to call me that!" she snarled.
"B-because I care about you," I grunted, my hands grabbing her wrists to try and steady myself. It's hard to speak clearly when you're being pinned to a wall. Nevertheless, I carried on. "We all care about you. U-556, Tirpitz, Eugen, all of us. You aren't alone, Bismarck. We aren't going to let you slip into madness and despair like last time. We won't lose you. I've barely spent a day with you and I don't want to lose this beautiful woman I'm just getting to know. Bismarck...please...stay…"
We stared into each other's eyes for what felt like an eternity, tears beginning to roll down our cheeks as the emotions of the day finally overtook us. Slowly, Bismarck lowered me to the ground, and as soon as my feet hit the floor, my legs gave out from under me. She quickly followed suit, and we found ourselves in a sobbing heap on the floor, holding on to one another.
"I'm sorry," I whispered softly, still blinking the tears from my eyes. "You're not a coward. You're the strongest, bravest woman I've ever known."
"Danke," she whispered back, sniffling as she wiped the tears from her face. "You're no coward yourself, you know. Not many people would have been able to stand up to me like that."
"You did say not to pull any punches with you," I weakly joked. She snorted, then giggled, which turned into full-blown peals of laughter. I couldn't help but laugh with her as the last bit of tension was finally swept away. When it finally subsided, Bismarck nodded in agreement.
"I did, didn't I? Hopefully, you won't have to hit quite so hard in the future, ja?"
"No promises," I smirked, "But I hope I won't have to, either."
Bismarck looked up and down the empty corridor before looking back at me. "So...what now?"
"For starters, let's grab a few tissues out of my office, and probably get back to work on our reports. If you want, you could stay in the office and we could talk. It doesn't have to be anything serious," I hastily added, "although we can if you want, but it would be nice just to have the company all the same."
She looked thoughtful for a moment before smiling softly at me. "I think it would be good to have some company."
It was well after midnight by the time we finished our respective reports. They probably needed a bit of cleanup and editing before filing them with High Command, but that could wait until tomorrow. As for Bismarck and I, we were exhausted and in dire need of rest. After a brief debate regarding sleeping on the couch, we decided to walk home to our respective quarters. As Bismarck's was closer, I would walk her home, and then head for my own apartment. We walked most of the way in silence, simply enjoying each other's company until Bismarck spoke up.
"So...you think I'm pretty?" she asked suddenly.
Caught off guard and dead tired, I sputtered like a fish out of water until I could regain my composure. "W-what?"
"Earlier, you said I was a 'beautiful woman'," she clarified, "Was that true?"
I took a deep breath and nodded. Guess we're still not pulling punches today. "Yes, yes it is. I think you're a beautiful woman, inside and out."
"I see…" she murmured, "Um...thank you."
While I'm still not sure exactly what I was expecting as a reply, that certainly wasn't it. "Oh, uh...you're welcome."
Bismarck smiled thinly and nodded in return before she continued. "By the way, I know things will be busy around here for a while, but I would enjoy it if we continued our tea time appointments on a daily basis."
The fact that she even asked was enough to perk me up again and put a smile on my face. "I'd like that. I don't know if we'll be able to make it a daily thing, but I'll do my best. And hopefully, future tea time won't be quite so...eventful as this one was."
Her laugh echoed around the quiet buildings and streets. "Indeed." Slowly she came to a halt in front of the Iron Blood dormitories and turned to face me. In the dim light, I thought I saw a blush spread across her cheeks, but it was hard to be certain. "Well, here we are. Gute Nacht, Herr Kommandant. I will see you tomorrow."
"Gute Nacht, Lord Bismarck," I replied, giving her a little bow. "Sleep well."
She gave a bow in return, spun on her heel, and strode into the building. I watched her go, her cape and hair flowing in the breeze, before finally making my way home. Despite how exhausted I was, both physically and mentally, I was nevertheless looking forward to spending more time with Bismarck.
A/N-And here we are at the end of an-oh, wait. This isn't the end, is it? Nope! We've got at least one more chapter to go before their story is all wrapped up! Thanks for reading, and if I've butchered any of the German words or phrases, please let me know so I can get things corrected. As always, fair winds and following seas!
