Ivy was on a rampage. It wasn't like when Mr J went on a rampage, it was more subtle, no screaming, nothing thrown, no shattering of glass, just a building tension as Ivy studied information about toxic spillover from a nearby factory, and narrowed eyes and tightened fists when she found drone footage of a 50 meter radius dead zone surrounding the offending factory. Still, it was enough for Harley to make a bedsheet fort in the living room, where she could hang out with Bud and Lou until the whole thing resolved itself. Ivy hadn't been scary yet, but the single-minded glint in her eye reminded Harley too much of the times Mr J would rage about Batman. And besides, who didn't like a fort? She had video games, popcorn, chips, ice cream and cookies, and Bud and Lou had their chew toys. It was perfect. The world outside could end in a Poison Ivy apocalypse for all Harley cared. At least, as long as she had enough snacks.
There was a fluttering at the entrance of the fort, and Ivy carefully pulled one sheet to the side. "Uh, Harley, can I come in?"
Harley inhaled deeply. Mr J would have torn the fort to the ground and ripped the sheets to shreds by now. "S-sure. Come on in. I've got plenty of snacks."
Ivy entered slowly, and sat down cautiously next to Harley. Their were bags under her eyes like she hadn't been sleeping much, and her hair was uncombed. "Harley, I've been busy lately," Ivy said with a sigh, running a hand through her hair. "I hope I didn't scare you with how…intense I've been."
"Nah, I understand," Harley said, and handed Ivy a bag of chips. "You look tired though, Red. You need your rest."
Ivy sighed again and opened the bag of chips. "I know. I just can't help thinking about all those plants and trees, and everything and everyone else downstream who are being affected. And I'm trying to come up with a plan that won't land us in Arkham."
"Mista J would work too hard too," Harley said while scooping up a big spoonful of coconut ice cream and handing it to Ivy. "He'd usually take breaks to let off stress, maybe beat up a few henchmen, break some of my things…"
Ivy accepted the ice cream. "Harley, what he did to you, it wasn't right. And I…I don't want you to ever have to feel unsafe around me." Tears brimmed at the edges of Ivy's eyes. "And if I ever remind you of him, please let me know and I'll stop whatever it is I'm doing."
Harley hugged Ivy close. "Aw Red, I know you'd never hurt me. I've just got a lot of ingrained habits from Mista J." Harley clunked herself on her own head to demonstrate. "It's like subconscious reactions or something. Lots of things remind me of him. But I'll let you know if you're ever scary."
Ivy gasped out a short laugh. "Thanks."
"Now," Harley said, standing up to brush the crumb remains of her video game snack-a-thon, "let's get you fed and rested, and then we can both work on the plan to take down that dirty polluter."
Ivy hugged Harley close, and it was warm and soft and gentle.
…
...
Devin Dupont was going to kill Vicky Vale. He closed and locked his office door, pocketing the icy key. But first, before he killed her, he would destroy her. She would wish she was dead after his lawyers were done with her. His extremely well-paid lawyers who were even now making the case for libel.
Wayne and the other industry leaders in Gotham were weak, letting the reporters pick at them like vultures, cleaning up any minor infraction caused by the company. It set a bad precedent, let the press think they were actually free to go after the industry that should own them, that they could make a difference, and shame CEOs into following some expensive guidelines made up by useless environmental hand-wringers. Did the bleeding-heart environmentalists employ 300 Gothamites like Devin? Absolutely not. They were all nothing more than leeches and parasites. Parasites that wanted nothing more than to suck up Devin's hard-earned money.
As Devin rounded the corner of his building, a monster rose out of the shadows - green skin (that would have blended in with foliage if there had been any left alive) with a flash of white teeth. Long vines scuttled and snaked across the ground. Devin jumped back, hand reaching for the gun in his waistband. He fired, but it was too late, the vines already circled around his ankles. He fired wildly in the monster's direction, as the vines yanked his legs out from underneath him
The monster approached him, wild red hair in disarray, and lips pulled into a snarl. She was terrible, and maybe she could be beautiful if she wasn't threatening his life, and instead had a demure smile. "Devin Dupont," the monster roared as she approached him, "you will pay for your crimes against the planet, and humanity."
Devin frowned, the pressure was building uncomfortably in his head as he dangled from the vines that held his ankles. "This is all a misunderstanding," he gasped out "Lies, Vicki Vale's lies. Put me down, and I'll explain." Perhaps he could salvage the situation. Maybe if the monster understood how cruelly he'd been treated by the press, she'd change her mind. Leave him alone. Maybe he could even convince her to go after Vicki. Now that was an exciting thought. His mouth curled into an anticipatory smirk at the thought of it. Yes, the glorious, evil, frightening monster would be perfect. And she would be his.
"Oh?" the monster frowned at him and raised an eyebrow. "Explain."
The vines dropped him to the ground with a thud that took the breath from his lungs. "Ah," he rubbed his side. "You see, I'm just a simple honest businessman."
"Is dumping your waste in the river honest?" the monster hissed.
"I mean, technically I don't dump anything in the river," Devin explained. "It just happens to run in there."
The monster shrieked, and the vines were back in an instant, wrapping around his throat. She leaned in close, hot breath in his ear. "So you do admit to dumping waste. Are you going to try and deny it's toxic?"
"Ah, just because that hack Vicki Vale wrote an article about kids getting cancer, doesn't mean I caused it. He struggled to loosen the vines around his neck, though honestly it was probably the most excitement he'd had with a woman in over a year. "It's a tragedy those kids got sick, but surely just a coincidence that they all happened to live close to my factory. They are free to move, they don't have to live there."
The monster just snarled, the vines tightened, and Devin's vison faded and went black.
...
...
When Devin blinked back to consciousness, he was back inside his office. He struggled to stand, but he was tied to his chair. The monster was on the other side of the room, stirring sludge in a beaker. He blinked again and leaned back. Now he remembered, he had seen the monster before, in a packet of "Reasons Not to Move to Gotham".
"Aw, Red, this is gross, are we really going to feed it to him?" asked Poison Ivy's blonde assistant.
"He claimed the runoff from his factory was harmless. We're just going to find out if he's telling the truth."
Devin screamed and started struggling. "You monster, you can't do that to me!"
Ivy was at his side in an instant, painfully pulling back his head with a cruel glint in her green eyes. "Aww, I'm just helping you prove what you told me. If the runoff from your factory is harmless, you should have no problem eating it, right?"
Devin gulped, and considered her words. Maybe it would be worth it, to earn the monster's trust. Cancer was mostly genetics and chance, right? How bad could one serving of dubiously toxic sludge be? He could go to the hospital if he got sick. Surely. "If I eat it, will you go after Vicki Vale for her lies?"
Poison Ivy threw back her head and laughed. "No."
Devin shrieked and pulled against his bonds. "That's not fair, this is all Vicki Vale's fault! She's jealous because I work and make money!" He jerked and pulled again. "Do you want money, is that what this is? I can pay you to let me go."
Poison Ivy rolled her eyes and sighed. "I really don't care what weird hang-up you have with Vicki Vale. And I don't care about money. You can't buy clean air and water." She raised the beaker of sludge to his face. "Now are you going to eat this, or admit your run-off is toxic?"
The smell from the sludge was sickening, far worse than he had anticipated, like rotting eggs mixed with molded onions. Devin gagged and pulled away from the beaker. He felt light-headed and his stomach curdled. "Fine!" he screamed. "Maybe it's dangerous, I don't know, just don't make me eat it."
"You can do better than that," Poison Ivy snarled.
"Please," Devin groveled, "please don't make me eat the toxic run-off from my factory."
"That's a start." Poison Ivy kept the beaker under his nose. "Why shouldn't I make you eat it?"
"Because-" Devin sniffed, he could deny this all later, couldn't he? No one in Gotham would believe a freak like Poison Ivy, they'd send her back to Arkham. "Because it smells terrible, it's probably toxic, and it might cause cancer." There. Correlation wasn't causation anyway. "Satisfied?"
"Very." Poison Ivy gave him a cruel smile and pulled the beaker away.
Just then, there was a crash of shattering glass, and a caped black shadow hurled through his office window, tumbling and rising fluidly from the floor.
"Batman," Devin shouted, almost giddy with excitement. His night was finally turning around. "Help! I've been kidnapped by Poison Ivy, and I don't know why!"
Batman stalked across the room and loomed over them. "Is this true?" he rasped.
Poison Ivy folded her arms across her chest. "His factory has been letting toxic sludge run off into the river. He admitted it. And kids downstream have been getting sick."
Batman's eyes narrowed.
"Lies, all lies!" Devin shrieked.
"Not according to him," Poison Ivy said smugly. "He admitted it. And Harley has everything on tape."
"Yep!" Harley help her phone up into the air and played back the video of Devin's shameful confession.
He slumped in his bonds. "That was under duress! It doesn't count!" he shouted, trying to salvage the situation.
"Leave it to the judge to decide," Batman said, then he turned to Poison Ivy and Harley. "Kidnapping, torture, and criminal trespassing are all crimes. I'm afraid I can't overlook this one."
Poison Ivy scoffed. "As if you don't do those things all the time."
"However," Batman continued, "I'm sure the sick kids appreciate your efforts. And no permanent damage has been done. So I'm not taking you to Arkham."
"Horray!" Harley cheered and jumped in the air.
Devin made indignant noises.
"I think…community service will be enough in this case." Batman said. "Teach gardening classes at the Library or something." He straightened up, looming over them again. "As long as he makes it safely to the Police Station, with all incriminating evidence."
Ivy smiled. "I will."
"And I better not get any calls about either of you for a while," Batman said gruffly as he disappeared through the broken window, and into the night.