Thanks to Saramagician, Eawynee, flame55, unnamed vistor, edboy4926, Saint Snape, Sato K4iba1, Iva1204, asdf, and JaneDohO. And to those who favourite and alert this story as well, but don't review, just as appreciated. No hard feelings since I'm not the best at reviewing either. I need to work on that. And to my beta, bksuprtdl
A/N: It's been awhile. I have been so busy the past several moments and have been unable to update any of my fics on here until recently. It's nice to write about fake characters and to know that no matter how stressed things seem, it's not as bad as these characters have it. As far as I know, no one is out to kill me. Or at least I hope not. No evil human is out trying to recruit me to be on their side or they'll kill me. A war's not about to break out, even with North Korea's threats to nuke South Korea. Been awhile since I've heard any threats actually (knock on wood three times). So, no war on the home front as of late and hopefully not any time soon, since war is shitty. Despite the job stress and school stress and ill parents stress and my sickness stress and money stress and all that other adult stress, life's not so bad.
Chapter Five: Troubled Waters
"Lily! Lily!"
Lily stopped in her tracks in the middle of the hallway and turned to the voice that had shouted at her.
"What's the hurry? Potter's the other direction." Sirius smirked with a wink at her.
She rolled her eyes with a huff. "I don't have time for this right now. Have you seen Severus?"
Sirius scoffed and glanced at her with an almost shocked, yet disgusted expression. "No. I thought you dropped that scumbag. No one cares about him, why should you?"
Lily bit her tongue hard to stop the venomous words at the tip from coming out. "That's not very nice, Sneerius-Sirius."
"Did you just call me what I think you called me?" Sirius's eyes were wide, yet a grin pierced his lips for a moment before glancing over her.
"I need to find Severus. If you haven't seen him, you are of no help."
"Why are looking for Snivellus? He was a jerk to you-you can't seriously be talking to him again?"
She grumbled to herself. "Professor Slughorn wants to see him."
"Why would Slughorn ask you to find him?"
Lily pierced her lips for a second to think over an answer. "He just did and I said I would-I don't have time for idle chat. I have things to do."
"He ought to know you haven't spoken for awhile, right?" He frowned. "Or have you forgiven the bastard?" Sirius scoffed. "Don't tell me you've forgiven the arse after what he called you?"
"I don't have time to listen to this right now. I have to find him."
"Why? I doubt Ol' Slughorn needs him right this second. You're gonna miss your class soon."
As Lily turned, she was stopped by a fellow classmate. "You're looking for Severus?"
"Yes, have you seen him?"
The girl shrugged. "I thought I saw him headed to the entrance as I was headed up. I think it was him anyway. It was hard to tell really. You're the one who hung around with him, not me so…not sure-hey, Lily! Where're you going? Lily!"
Lily barely heard her as she sprinted down the hall and nearly ran into a ghost as she rounded the marble stairs to the entrance hall.
"Watch your step, lass. No need to rush out. Weather is looking grim as it is out there and Herbology and Care for Magical Creatures is the other direction."
She ignored the ghost and race down the stairs to the front doors of the castle and tore outside and down the stone steps. In her hurry, her foot slid on a slick step, but she caught her balance before she fell with a gasp. As she looked back at the spot where she nearly fell, she huffed and murmured to herself, "sheesh."
Lily took the steps a little more careful the rest of the way down and rubbed her robed arms with her bare hands as the lake's chill hit her upon arrival at the bottom of the stairs. "Should have brought my cloak," she whispered to herself, though she was not sure why she was whispering.
The lake was still as she treaded the sandy bar with the water barely touching ashore. Not a single bird bothered to chirp, all of them either hidden from the weather or had already gone south for the winter. She thought it was a good day for everyone to be hidden as the wind suddenly picked up, the frigid air taking her breath away for a moment.
No one was in sight as she travelled along. She yelled out for Severus, but the wind quickly drowned her words. She coughed at the air's force and put the back of her left hand to her nostrils and sniffed to prevent mucous from coming out.
As she turned the corner, she stopped abruptly and nearly tripped over her own feet. At the edge of the lake he stood with water to the edge of his trousers.
"Severus?" She spoke in a soft voice with a little quiver as she slowly approached him. He did seem to hear her or he was ignoring her, she was not sure which. "Severus? Sev-what-what are you doing out here? I was looking everywhere for you."
He just stood there and Lily gulped.
"Severus? Sev-answer me. What's wrong?"
He jumped and yanked out his wand as he turned her direction, which made her let out a startled gasp.
"Don't do that!" He yelled out.
Lily narrowed her eyes toward him, "You mean go looking for you? Sorry," she mocked.
Severus glared at her, "You found me. You want an award?"
Lily rolled her eyes and scoffed, "You know, you really are an asshole sometimes."
"If I'm asshole, why bother keeping me around?"
Lily paused for a moment before her lips curved into a smirk, "Guess I like assholes."
"Considering those googly eyes you give Potter, it seems you must."
"Stop."
"Stop what?"
"Don't work yourself up over them right now."
"I'm not."
"You always do."
"If they weren't such airheaded boars, always whining about something-"
"Don't start."
Severus's eyes shot daggers her direction, "You're defending them!"
"I am not defending them at all. This-nothing-none of it has anything to do with them."
"It has plenty to do with them!"
"They don't matter. You are what matters right now. Your life. They are fine. They're unimportant."
"They're quite important to you and every other damn person in the school. Don't even pretend they're not." He kicked a small stone at the water as he glanced at the darkening clouds that approached the castle swiftly. "No one matters, but them. It's no use. Why even try?"
Lily yanked his shoulder hard, which caused him to nearly stumble as he faced her. Her ashen cheeks were now rosy from the chill. Her hand was ice cold, but her touch warmed him instantly. "You matter." She took a step back and handed him his greying socks, "I'm not with them. I'm here with you. You matter. Everyone matters."
Severus took the socks from her and struggled on the verge of something to say as her eyes grew glossy.
Lily sniffed and put her left arm's sleeve to her nose. "It's freezing out here. My nose is frozen. We should go in."
"I don't want to go in," He snapped.
Lily jumped in start, but quickly regained her composure, "Professor Slughorn and Professor McGonagall are looking for you, by the way. They stopped me on my way out to look for you to say they were looking for you..."
"I don't care."
"They're going to go looking for you if you don't go to them. They are worried about you."
Severus scoffed as he put on his damp socks.
"They are worried about you missing so much class lately." She folded her arms as she braced herself against a strong gust. "You really are troubled. None of this is like you."
He scoffed again, "You don't know anything about me."
She narrowed her eyes again, "Oh? That so?"
"Yeah, that's so."
"I bet I know more about you than anyone else in this school."
"I don't think so."
"Oh, yeah? How many people know you make up spells and experiment in potions to make them far better than the books ever could?"
"People know I can make my own spells and I do well in Potions."
"What about the time in third year when you glued Pettigrew to his seat?"
"Who told you that?"
"I'm not stupid. I know it was you."
"Then why didn't you tell me?"
Lily shrugged, "No evidence."
"That's not knowing more than anyone else just because you know one misdeed I did three years ago."
Lily looked down at her shoes a moment and then looked up at him with a smirk, "What about the toy wand you would sleep with because it made you feel like a real wizard until you got a real wand?"
"You said you'd never tell anyone about that!"
"And I haven't. I know you, Severus. You are melancholic by nature and sometimes daft-"
"I'm not daft!"
"Oh, you are so. You are quite brilliant, Severus Snape. One of the most brilliant people in this school, but sometimes you're very daft in your actions."
"And what, you're the patron saint of Scotland? Daft indeed, Lily." Severus waited for her to snap back at him, but instead she just stared for a moment and then the right side of her mouth twitched and then twitched again and she let out a little chuckle. All of a second later, she burst into a laughing fit that made him raise his eyebrows.
"Oh, it's funny? I'm daft."
Lily was holding her stomach, unable to stop laughing, "I can't-no-not fun-ny..."
"Have you lost your mind?"
"I'm sorry-it's just-okay-we're both a little daft." She pulled herself together, but still held her sides, "You called me daft as well."
"It takes one to know one."
For a moment, Lily was sure she saw Severus's lips twinge as if he might smile. Her heart moved up from her stomach a little, "I saw that."
He raised his right eyebrow, "Saw what?"
She slid her hand on top of his, "Your hand is like ice. Shall we go in now?"
"I don't want to talk to anyone."
"Tell them you don't then, but you must come inside. You'll catch your death out here."
"Maybe that was my intention."
She held her hands over his with a gentle rub in an attempt to warm them up a little. Severus's heart gave a flutter and a small wave of nausea hit him, but in a good way. It was hard to explain the feeling, even to himself.
"No, it's not. You don't-we need you-I need you."
Severus swallowed hard, "You-you need me."
"Friends need each other."
"F-friends? I thought-I thought you hated me."
"I never hated you."
"Yes, you did." He yanked his hands away from hers.
"No, I never hated you. I was mad at you, frustrated with you. Hate you? No. I was upset and angry, but hatred wasn't how I felt. I felt-I felt hurt. Sad. I lost a good friend and I lost him to someone dangerous, I thought. And I couldn't stop it. It hurt because-because you were so much better, Severus. You were. You were and you wanted to throw it all away-away to someone-something that was going to destroy you, but you couldn't-you wouldn't see it." Her eyes glossed over and she sniffed.
"I didn't want to hurt you," He whispered, "I don't know why I said that and I'd give anything to take it all back."
"Don't. We can't go back, only forward. It happens and it's over and I forgive you. I hope you can do the same."
"Forgive you? For what?"
"For not doing enough to stop you. For seeing you so sad and being too much of a coward to not care what others thought and help you. Some Gryffindor I am. Brave? No, I was a coward."
"No, you-you're never a coward."
She nodded, "I was and I'm sorry for not doing anything sooner."
"You couldn't help me."
"Maybe not, but I could try. I want to try," She held her hand to him, "let me try. Will you give me another chance to be your friend?"
Severus thought he'd been slammed into a parallel universe, "Give you a second chance? I'm the one who needs to be asking for another chance, not you?"
"Is that a yes?"
Severus looked out at the lake one last time and slipped on his shoes just before taking the hand she had offered. A cheery grin pierced her lips for a brief moment and she looked into his eyes. His heart gripped and the answer was set. One more chance.