Ok, I am so so so so so so so sorry for the lack of updatage. Had computer and internet problems of monumental proportions that are causing me to mimic a bull just thinking about them all...oh the rage...
Anyhoo, once again, not mine. Although maybe...nope. I was mistaken. Still not mine. sigh
"Sweetie! Where have you been? You're so late!"
Angela was practically buzzing as she interrogated her friend, hopping frantically from one foot to the next. Brennan was getting vertigo just looking at her.
"Ange, I told you I was going to catalogue those bones before…"
Her sentence was cut off as Angela frantically waved a hand in front of her face.
"I know, I know. But nobody ever MEANS that stuff. Except you. They just say it to sound dedicated. Try it sometime."
Brennan's forehead scrunched up in confusion.
"Say something I don't mean? Angela, that is the most irresponsible…"
Angela's loud frustrated sigh cut Brennan off once again.
"Ok, fine. Whatever. At least you're here now. That's all that matters."
Taking Brennan's arm, she began to guide her through the throngs of people gathered for the annual F.B.I. fundraiser. Most years the Bureau held a raffle with various, enticing prizes. If the attendees were lucky, a luxury holiday was sometimes auctioned off.
This year was different. This year they had decided to auction off some of their agents. There were two reasons for this. One: it was significantly cheaper than an exotic holiday. Two: the Bureau had been so inundated with e-mails from a certain artist requesting this particular type of fundraiser that they eventually gave in just to give the computer system a break.
The two women entered a large hall. Circular tables had been arranged haphazardly around the room; no more than five seats to a table. At the top of the room there was a makeshift stage with a large banner over it with the words "F.B.I. Agent Auction" emblazoned across it in sparkly red writing. Apparently a certain artist had also helped with the decorating. It was something of a mystery to the Bureau why this particular lady was so eager to help. But eager she was. And, in all honesty, there was little anyone could do to stop her.
Smiling broadly at everyone they passed, Angela eventually brought Brennan to their table where Hodgins, Zach and Cam sat waiting. All three greeted Brennan warmly as she sat down and took in her surroundings.
"What do they mean, an "Agent Auction"?"
Angela made an impatient 'give me strength' motion.
"Sweetie, I told you. They're auctioning off agents this year. There's a list of potential agents to be…ah…bought (Brennan's eyes went a little bit squinty at this) and people put down the name of the agent they're looking for and the amount they're willing to pay on the ballot sheet. Very simple really."
Mouth slightly open, Brennan looked around the room.
"Ok then, where can I…stake my claim, I suppose."
Looking gleeful, Angela began bouncing in her seat.
"You can't! Polling's been closed!"
Brennan's face dropped, her eyes widening in disappointment.
Angela reached over and patted her hand reassuringly.
"Don't worry. We put your name down for someone too, so you wouldn't miss all the fun."
Brennan instantly perked up, a smile lighting up her face. She settled back into her chair. Almost as soon as the calm had come, it vanished. Brennan suddenly bolted up straight. She flapped frantically at Angela, her face stricken.
"Wait, what do you mean by fun? Just normal fun or…Angela, who did you put down?"
Angela broke off her running commentary of sweet talk into Hodgins' ear and cast Brennan a wide-eyed look, face a picture of innocence.
"Oh, I don't know, honey. Just somebody. Anybody really. Didn't really think it mattered. Unless you had somebody in mind…." She arched an eyebrow suggestively.
Brennan hurriedly sat back.
"No, no. That sounds fine. You…eh…you didn't bet TOO much, did you? Not that I wouldn't mind paying it…it's just, I don't really want to win."
Hodgins gave a short bark of laughter, his eyes dancing.
"Don't worry about it. It's on me. Angela asks me to do anything and…well I just can't deny her."
He gazed adoringly at her.
Angela leaned in conspiratorially. "The trick is to start off with the words, "If you love me you'll…" Works every time."
Brennan leaned forward hopefully. "And the amount?"
Angela glanced quickly at Cam, who smoothly interjected.
"You never really know how much money people will end up bidding on these things. Maybe you'll win. Maybe you won't. It's not really to do with the amount. It's all up to chance."
Brennan looked satisfied with this answer, even if Zach let out a rather incredulous snort that Cam quickly shushed. She settled back into her chair as an Agent Brown, the host for the evening, brought a mic up to the stage and asked for anyone still outside to please come in and take their seats. The movement of the many stragglers shuffling in to find a vacant table prevented Brennan from hearing Hodgins' hissed whisper to Angela, "She'd better win! Five grand!"
Angela smiled impishly at him and raised a finger to her lips.
Agent Brown thanked everyone for coming and gave a short history of previous fundraisers and what the capital raised by them had been used for. Once finished, he wasted no time in starting the proceedings.
Brown would call out a particular agent's name. That agent would then enter from the door at the back and walk the length of the room to the stage. This was often accompanied by wolf whistles and a number of lewd, good-natured shouts.
When the agent reached the stage, he took a few minutes to parade across it. This was when the screams and whistles grew to deafening levels. Brown listed a number of interesting, quirky, good qualities about the agent as he strutted his stuff. When the little parade was completed, Brown announced the figure that the bidding had started at. The agent often made a sad, puppy-dog face at the amount and began repeatedly raising his hands, palm upwards, toward the ceiling, hoping the eventual figure was significantly higher.
Brown then called out a few subsequent figures, not necessarily ones that had been bid, just ones that were higher than the first but lower than the winning amount. This was done in the manner of: "Was it fifty dollars?…No. How about sixty dollars? Wrong again!" and so on and so forth. Eventually, with much drum rolling and suspenseful pauses, Brown announced the winning bid and the bidder's name.
The bidder then joined the agent on the stage, often greeted with a quick hug or a sweeping kiss for the audience, and led them back down to their table. And on it went. An hour into the show and everyone was in high spirits. There had been enough entertaining catcalls and witty banter on all sides to keep everyone's interest piqued.
"And now…the final agent."
A hush fell over the room. Angela started squeaking quietly. Brennan looked confusedly at her, but Angela just shook her head and gestured back at the stage. Her squeakings increased in pitch.
"We decided we had to end the evening with this particular agent. The winning bid on this guy was so much, we felt it really had to be put at the end, if only to end proceedings on a high note."
Zach cleared his throat while shooting a glance at Angela, the significance of which was lost on Brennan.
Brown scanned the whole audience, leaving them all in suspense until he finally announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, would you please welcome…Special Agent Seeley Booth!"
The doors at the back opened for a final time and Booth entered. He walked the length of the room, flashing his famous smile on all sides. The screams and yells reached fever pitch and a number of people started stamping their feet energetically on the floor. Brennan shook her head in amusement. It figured really. She should have known Booth would have the highest bid. He WAS heart-stoppingly handsome.
Stop that Temperance!
When Booth reached the stage and began to swagger across it, Brennan was sure the roof was going to lift off. Never had she heard such loud shouts and bawdy comments. And about her partner too. Whenever she actually managed to comprehend what was being said about him, she blushed furiously from her roots right down to her stylish heels. People were really saying that…about Booth? Not that it wasn't true…or at least, she really wouldn't be surprised if it were true, but still…
It was almost impossible to hear what Brown was saying about her partner. Nobody seemed to mind in the least. All the distraction they needed was displayed in front of them. When Booth finally stopped parading, it took the room a few extra minutes to quieten down. Booth made use of the free time by searching the room for Brennan. He found her and gave her his biggest, brightest, most charming smile of the evening. Brennan didn't think she could go any redder. Angela looked as though she might faint.
Brown held up his hands for silence, which was granted within a few seconds. He grinned out at them all.
"The starting bid for this man was fifty dollars."
Angela let out a loud "Boo!". Hodgins frantically hushed her and Brown continued.
"The starting bid was fifty dollars…and what do you think the winning bid was? Do I hear a hundred dollars? No. How about two hundred? You're way off! Five hundred? Not even close!"
A hum of anticipation filled the room. Brown left them all waiting a few seconds.
"The final bid for Special Agent Seeley Booth was…five thousand dollars…."
Brown was prevented from continuing with his announcement as the hall erupted into the loudest screams and cheers so far. Angela began shaking every movable part of her body and squealing louder than the rest. Hodgins muttered something about "no living with her now". Zach and Cam exchanged glances, smiling broadly.
Brown tapped the mic a few times to get everyone's attention.
"The winning bid was made by a….Dr., that part's in capitals, folks, a DR. TEMPERANCE BRENNAN! Come up to the stage, Dr. Brennan, and claim your prize!"
Brennan's body went slack. She turned wildly to Angela, mouth open but unable to form any words. Angela was no help. She was giggling wildly and clapping her hands like a child. The best Brennan could manage was a number of open-close mouth movements, rather like a fish. She glanced hurriedly up at the stage to see how Booth was taking the news.
Booth had fallen over. At Brown's revelation his knees had given way. He now stared at Brennan from his somewhat lowered vantage point, eyes huge, eyebrows somewhere in his hair and mouth gaping.
Brown laughed and spoke into the microphone again. "Come on up now, don't be shy! Everybody give a big cheer for Dr. Brennan, the highest bidder of the evening."
The room was filled with clapping and calls of encouragement. Before she really knew what happened, Brennan had been dragged to her feet by four pairs of hands and propelled in the general direction of the stage.
She looked around her, agog.
"But I didn't…"
People from other tables began giving her reassuring nudges forward. Angela's voice floated across the din, "Nobody likes a sore winner, sweetie!"
In a daze, Brennan reached the top of the room, where she was fairly hauled up onto the stage by Brown. She was extremely grateful: there was no way she would have made it up otherwise.
Booth had since rejoined the land of the vertical and had apparently recovered. His stance was relaxed, his eyes dancing and his smile full-on charm. Brennan wasn't quite sure how to react. She stood mutely, running her fingers through her hair.
Brown took hold of her wrist and moved her over towards Booth, Brennan stumbling all the way. When they reached the agent, his smile did the seemingly impossible and increased in wattage. His eyes were only on her. Stepping behind them, Brown joined their two hands together and raised them up in a gesture of triumph.
"Let's hear it for Seeley Booth and Temperance Brennan!"
Angela led the way, the screaming, stampings, whistling, shouting and general mayhem spread like wildfire across the room, rumbling up through Brennan's body and rattling her ribcage.
"But…I didn't…."
Booth stopped her feeble protest by placing his free hand over her mouth.
"It's alright, Bones."
She relaxed slightly.
"You don't have to pay to spend time with me. I'll do that for free."
Her indignant spluttering was lost in the roar of the crowd.