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The following is a fan-based

FICTION

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Chapter 2: Girls, Feels and Worm

This is... a terrible predicament.

I had expected that things would have been far more different than what I knew of the Kaleidverse but... Kiritsugu and Irisviel were in Fuyuki and they suspected about Illya's little magical adventure.

I had hoped that the changes would have been minimal at best, like the Tohsakas still living in Fuyuki for some reason or that Shirou had not been adopted... but the mere idea that the Magus Killer was there, closing up to find about the whole 'magical girl' debacle was something chilling.

And that was the first of the infinite issues that were there in Fuyuki that the series has not touched about. The second problem, a personal one, was that the Matou existed just... not in the way I had expected.

It would seem that Zouken had perished few months after the dismantling of the Grail, the proud bastard deciding against trying to tickle the ever-attentive Zelretch about a Dark Grail and had decided that there wasn't anything worthwile to do in his life.

The worms had all been removed but at the cost of the family losing their noble title for the horrible practice being brought to attention to the major individuals in Clock Tower. Byakuya had lived happily with his wife and a little child that was conceived two years after Zouken's death.

It stung a little that there was no Shinji in this part of the Kaleidverse, that I was pretty much like Miyu at this point. But I was hardly happy that the old worm had died mysteriously, something in the back of my head demanding real evidence of his passing.

Maybe I was paranoid but.. I am not willing to deal with two old bastards and their cheating for some stupid Wish. The Grail was stupid like the ones that believed it to be some blessing from the past.

It wasn't and... I will destroy any single one I will find in my path.

But let us pause for a moment. Let us return to a real problem that was going to be a hassle to deal with. Where was I supposed to live while staying in this dimension?

The 'kindness' from the older version of Luvia was refused on the basis her mansion was right in front of the home of a man capable of killing me if he caught me in some shady situations. The Matou Mansion was now in ruins and it would take too much coin and effort to restore it to acceptable conditions and the former home of the Tohsakas was in a worse situations.

I was kind of touched when Prillya, red-faced and quite embarrassed, expressed her hospitality if there was no other places that could house us all. I declined again but this time I explained that the reasons was more about her father's and mother's reactions to two Magus asking for two rooms.

I could already imagine two Origin Bullets being rapidly fired, the first one between my eyes and the last one between my legs.

It was actually Kuro that pointed out something I had totally forgotten about this universe. There was the Einzbern Castle still sitting by the end of the forest, with fully operational Homunculi working day and night to make the fortress optimal to live in.

But I should explain the logic behind this acceptable option: when the Greater Grail was dismantled and the Einzberns decided to let Irisviel and Kiritsugu go and live their merry life away from the strict family, the group had pushed for two simple demands. A) Illya's memory regarding the Grail's working and the ones related Justeaze were to be sealed away and B) Irisviel would have to forfeit her rights as heiress to the family.

Both clauses were accepted and Illya's mother was Einzbern only nominally at best, leaving the castle's inheritance to... Kuro.

Now things turn tricky as the pseudo-servant's claim was stronger than anything Illya herself could muster legally. Being the direct part from Illyasviel that is related to Justeaze and now a independent individual, Kuro/Chloe was the sole heiress to the old Magus family from Germany.

The idea was instantly approved by the girl herself much to Prillya's dismay. Maybe it was disappointment because she wanted a 'younger' sibling or maybe she just wanted to accomplish her little 'Oneesama' kink she had long harbored in secret.

I almost wanted to pinch those adorable cheeks but then it would become weird. It would become quite awkard and if I have to be honest, the FBI is still a tangible threat to fear for a small Magus like me.

It was utterly hilarious when I had to explain how to beat Bazzett in the quickest and craziest way possible. Let Miyu install the Cu Chulainn Card and let the Irish woman fawn over the Lancer Loli.

And through that embarrassing moment, the 'adopted' Edelfelt made it clear with her gestures that she had a question she wished to ask me. 'Did I know about her predicament?'

It was subtle but I could clearly see her nervous about it all and I decided to be today. "He is alive."

Surprise ruled in that maelstrom of emotions hidden within the quiet girl's visage but a small brave smile showed gratitude. What a delightful response, I mused as I found amusing Prillya's confusion over my words.

As the meeting was concluded I was surprised the moment I was stopped by Chibi-Luvia. The blonde took hold of my arm, keeping me stuck and confused. Her eyes were directed to the floor but there was once in a while a flicker my direction. "Are you okay?"

She started to tremble a little and my free hand went to pull her in a small hug.

Maybe I should have picked better words to address the fact the young version of the 'Ohohohoh' was quite distressed by the overwhelming situation, something that looked so endless in her logic to solve and.. yet I could see it so clearly.

But the problem lingered far away from mere present circumnstances and hovered over a terrible realisation I had time and time again come to forget.

Luvia was 7, my own age, and she had two doting but loving parents. Sure, becoming Zelretch's apprentice was enough of a treat to coat the growing anxiety but it vanished the moment reality reared its ugly face.

She was stuck in a place with familiar faces that barely give her the same comfort that gave before being thrown here. Like a castaway stuck in a city, one that had long forgotten its past familiarity to assume a better concept that alienates the very exiled man that had sought for so long to make a return to it.

Luvia was stuck in the water that is the unknown and... I was the small boat, that she had grown accustomed to, that would help her from drowning in the nothingness.

See? I can be quite the poetic trash once in a while.

"Do you want to come with us?" Maybe I should have said 'with me' but then I would have to face double the trouble that rose out of that question.

"Little Luvia is an Edelfelt and she will live here, foolish Matou." Cold, political and quite extravagant. If I was to compare chibi-Luvia with the older one I would say those were the adjective she would have acquired if she had stayed within the walls of Clock Towers, where only politics and powerplays made Magi capable of gaining some important standing within the Moonlit World.

"She has the right to decide where to stay and..." I turned to look at a frowning Kuro. "I suppose one person will not 'burden' the Castle too much?"

She knew I was joking about it, the servitude being as plentiful as the rooms available in the fortress, but she nodded nonetheless. Her eyes were glowing a curious light, craving to.. do something.

Hopefully nothing that saw me going to jail one way or another, I stated within the safety of my mind.

In the end, Chibi-Luvia accepted the proposal, continuing to hold my arm even after we stepped over the gates of the mansion and I decided to not mind it over too much as my glance was stolen by another sight. One far scarier than I had thought possible.

Caring for some small flowers growing in some of the pots near his house's entrance, Kiritsugu Emiya glanced up and in my direction, giving me a long look that managed to send a multitude of shivers down my little spine before returning to his gardening.

What an annoying retired Hero of Justice.

The insides of the Castle were far warmer than I had expected. I contemplated if it was something like some special magecraft applied there or this was the result of a modernisation led by the last generation of Einzberns.

Maybe both, I deduced without much proof, maybe both.

The reason I was staring so hard to try and focus on things so flimsy was because I was unnerved by the Homunculi. The realistic touch to the emotionless being was something I had hoped wouldn't have been as impactful as it was being to my mind.

Those are not real people. That is what I was trying to repeat like a mantra the more I saw the ever-so-similar maids around the castle's halls. Those are not real people.

It sounded cruel but... the sight was inhumane. To consider those models humans would be like saying that Illumi from Hunter x Hunter was one of the most cheerful characters ever existed.

The emotion, or lack thereof, was something that added more to the dreadful lullaby those individuals made while walking. The pattern was always the same, the steps being so perfect that sounded so dull to my ears.

Maybe challenging myself to not get killed by the Magus Killer would have been a funnier exercise for my mind than dealing with this psychological torture.

At least the worms are not hurting.

"I wonder if there is still some gold from the Grail within the Castle..." I paled a little as Kuro mused outloud those very words. "Maybe we could sell it to have something to use." Her glowing eyes turned my direction and I felt addressed by the girl.

Sell Fafnir's cursed gold? It would be a good way to get rid of the bad luck this place has if there is any lying around. I nodded at her and Kuro looked pleased by my approval.

I was doubtful that this wasn't out of mere friendship but.. that it was because I proved to be a stable crutch in her current instability and had been the very first individual that didn't considered her a.. mistake.

I wonder what Irisviel actually thought when she first saw that part of her daughter she had hoped she would have never see until the very end of her life. Maybe regret, the knowledge that she had been sentient must have been terrible to deal.. and yet she hadn't showed much reaction about it.

Was I rambling now? Maybe this world was just as cotton-candyish as I had expected or maybe the world is dumb enough to ignore the chaos and terror it was still suffering everyday.

I mean, does the Magus Killer even do missions? I could remember that his job was something that he accomplished oversea, in foreign lands. Like assassinations.

Today was truly a good day to consider gloomy fates but maybe it was in my DNA as a member of the Matou family. We are edgy and tragic. We are tragedgey.

I wonder if puns are truly the first sign of depression in people...

Ignoring this insignificant monologue, I returned back to stare at the door that led to a simple room. The main feature, a large bed (which looked a little smaller than Queen-size) looked quite soft to my tired eyes, but I was far too much experienced with deceptive looks to know that this wasn't the case.

I wonder when was the last time the Einzberns had considered to optimize their living quarters- Actually, I wonder if Kuro will be interested in buying a TV, console and videogames just like Illya did in Carnival Phantasm. Sadly there wouldn't be a faithful Berserker-kun helping in buying batteries for the gamepads if that was the case.

Anyway my 'room' looked quite big, maybe twice as big as it was back in my 'home' and less oppressive too. There was a large part of the wall in front of the bed dedicated to the wardrobe, a massive wood furniture that reminded me of a womanly-house.

Obviously mine wasn't some kind of derogative insult but the castle was hold and I doubt the Einzberns had ever had trouble with the male-female sthick. I mean, wasn't Justeaze the head of the family in a certain period of history?

Returning back to the room, I noticed that it had been refurbished with clean objects but no clothes. Smart Kuro, knowing that it would have been quite distasteful to have old clothes to wear when going outside. That also reminded me we were going for a shopping spree, one that would have Luvia and Kuro as protagonists and... I was going to die by boredom.

I stared out of the window, my blue eyes still tired out and I noticed it was afternoon. Soon it will be time for some dinner and hopefully the food reserves were well-stocked... somehow.

Hopefully we weren't going to eat wood out of the long tables of the dining rooms of this large fortress because that would be quite the 'crux' of the situation.

...

Goddamit, was that even a pun coming from my mind?

It would seem like my head was starting to lose its touch when dealing with the disappointing situation and- "Uh?"

I was tackled on the bed from behind, couldn't see at first whom was the culprit but her arms were lax in letting me turn around in her hold and.. I blinked as Kuro snuggled her head close to my chest.

"Are you low in Prana?"

She glanced up, quickly shaking her head as she returned to stare in the distance, absent to the world. "No."

Few moments passed in silence and then the girl spoke again. "When did things went wrong?" I blinked again. "When did I start to see myself not as Illyasviel von Einzbern?"

I frowned at her words, contemplating why she was suffering now this kind of identity crisis. I had yet to tell her something about that but...

"I suppose it starts because you are not her."

She didn't reject my words, merely narrowing her eyes in a confused stare before sighing. "Why am I not her?"

"You are part of Illyasviel von Einzbern. Just like the one that live in this world with that name is." I paused for a moment, trying to remember how to phrase this kind of explanation without my death. "You are a mashup of a Hero and Justeaze. You are unique."

"A copy of copies?" I blinked twice at that, a small smile rousing in my face as I thought how amusing it was that she considered her that.

"Why are you smiling?"

"Because you fail to see a very big detail, right on your face." I poked at her nose and her lips, still stuck in a thin line, showed a quick upward twitch. "You are someone, Illya. You may have whatever name you wish to have. Illya, Kuro, Chloe... you are still someone that is alive and.. can feel emotions like a human being."

I looked up at the room's ceiling. "Maybe you have a mix of different abilities some have used in the past but... who doesn't think what you have isn't cool? How many people would crave to have this opportunity in their lives... you have been blessed. Half and half but... it still counts as a blessing."

"How so?"

My smile widened just a little as I enjoyed how wrong I was about the bed being sturdy.

"You can live. So live and be alive."

...

At first it was muffled in my shirt then she move her mouth up, letting a delicious series of giggles that ended with the biggest grin I had ever seen in her face.

"Shinji." She tilted her head cheerfully. "I am glad I met you."

I was glad myself but I decided to nod at her, my hand now patting her head softly as I let sleep take over my mind. Maybe I will regret falling asleep with a known pervert resting on my chest but... I was tired. I needed to unwind those monumental moments with some rest.

What a good day to be alive.

AN

I've been busy with... stuff. *Diary of a straight Dude pops around the corner* I'm stuff.*Blush for no reason whatsoever because what the fuck?*

Anyway, Shinji is safe and sound, Luvia is a lovely child and Kuro will turn into something peculiar. She will tease people but... she will be more open around those she felt she can trust.

Also the reason Shinji didn't tell Rin and Older!Luvia about the fourth card is... for a childish reason. It will all become clear next chapter.

Lastly I noticed that people are looking at this. HALLELUJAH FROM THE LOWEST HELL'S CIRCLE! xD

Are there pairi- NO DANGIT, Age is not just a number and Jail is not just a room. I will still drop some heavy fluff bomb left and right once in a while.

You mentioned something about gender- I was doing it for the joke's sake! I am not going to sponsor any unnecessary politics in my stories if only for the sake of jokes and satirical content.

Hello, I am a Nigerian Prince- HOW IN THE FUCK DO I GET SPAM EVEN THERE!

REVIEW Q&A!

Avalanche-dragoon: Thank you, man!

Guest (chapter 2): I decided to make the Matou 'normal' just for the sake of not overcomplicating things. Shinji has already enough crap with the Ainsworth and this is not going to be his only Dimensional Hop. There is a lot he needs to do in this horrible Macroverse. Also I am still thinking how to develop CrazyYandereDoll!Sakura. Maybe she will be a brocon like the Ainsworth girls are with Julian.

merendinoemiliano: Dunno why but Illya is easy for me to elaborate. Maybe I just found it saddening that she didn't get a route in the Visual Novel and never gets a happy ending in FSN.

akasuna123: It's going to be an endless clusterfuck of Excaliblasts.

BlueXtreme: From what I found while reading of the Extra/CCC timeline, it is stated that Shinji could also have been a young man that was responsible for stopping a terrorist (few suspects it is EMIYA). But also yes, Extra/CCC!Shinji is better than the standard one.

MasterOfDragonsGod: Thank you!

Perran Onh: Here is the new chapter.

Undying Soul98: Thousands thanks for the kind words!