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FICTION
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Chapter 19: Prerogative, Unexpected and (not) Worm
~Kuro's POV~
After facing quite the embarrassing day at Homurahara because of her 'lovely but antiquate dress', Chloe von Einzbern was now firmly aware of the truest extent of Shinji's style of passive vengeance.
Not only did the tanned girl have to deal with the overly-annoying girls trying to get photos of her 'mature clothes', but she also had to endure the comments coming from her counterparts.
Illya was the quietest, yet she would actively interact with Miyu's queries over the curious dress and why Shinji had deemed it right to give it to Kuro.
"A-Ah, that is because… it was one of the classic clothes for the Einzbern family," The red-eyed girl had replied nervously. "I remember Mama having some spares of this very clothes but for me… when I was younger."
At this new detail, the Edelfelt's eyes widened in surprise. "So you used to wear clothes like that?"
It was a question of pure curiosity, innocent and curt discretion but for some reason the pale Einzbern blushed at it, possibly thinking of the strangest of escalations that could be born out of that conversation.
"Y-Yes- I mean, it was tradition and-"
"Have you tried to wear it to see how would you look with it?" Miyu inquired even more, seemingly interested by the topic. "It looks pretty comfy."
"M-Mama would surely issue a newer set by the local tailor but-"
"I'm already doing that, sweetie~!" Irisviel interrupted chirpily while her fingers swiftly wrote something by her cellphone, the woman standing beside an amused Taiga Fujimura.
"S-See- Wait, MAMA, what are you doing here?!"
Cue the ultimate issue that Kuro could have to face in this specific circumstance, the bane of her existence dignified in a kind and beautiful woman that was Illya's mother and… her 'relative' to a fair extent.
'It was part of the tradition,' the woman had motivated without skipping a beat in pestering and giddily distract the living heck out of the trio of girls.
Yes, Miyu was surprisingly caught in the crossfire and rendered an interesting target considering her friendly relationship with Illya.
Which of course was beyond the normal friendship considering the blushes both would sport when the other appeared to be so 'cute and adorable'.
It was like watching two black holes starting a paradox, it was a slow process but one that offered just some moments of relief away from dealing with the woman herself.
Irisviel decided to be merciless for this occasion, her phone steadily getting filled with numerous photos of 'little Chloe' in her plum-colored dress.
And the worst thing? She didn't like the dress. Not at all.
While the tan girl had tried to appear unimpressed by the early decision of the young Matou to have her wear such an old piece of her family's past, Kuro couldn't certainly deny how uncomfortable it was to don it around.
While it did look 'comfy' from the outside, the fabric of the dress was incredibly itchy and quite distracting as she tried and failed to keep calm during a mere English lecture.
Even the quirky nature behind the teacher, Taiga sparing her class none of her excited self, failed to get her attention onto the lesson itself… which then prompted some words from Irisviel about her inattentive self.
"Chloe-chan, don't doodle!" and other comments of the kind were quick to draw everyone's looks on her already-difficult attempt to write down some notes over the lesson.
The humiliation was stinging, there was no doubt about it, but beyond the 'acceptance of this punishment', Kuro was also starting to feel the need to wack Shinji's head for having got Irisviel to join her in this horrible day at school.
Kami, why are thou so cruel? And why is Shinji even crueler than thee?
But God failed to answer, something she was already aware about and… yet it didn't change much about her current predicament.
Patience was the strong of the virtue, but so was the cunning of a scorned woman.
Something, eventually, will bring her the chance of returning the favor back to the Matou, his little payback starting to sound way too vindictive to be associated just with going against Berserker.
Sure, fighting a monstrous girl with immense stamina and a non-negligible regenerative power while having to already face the issues coming from a body that drained much faster than a normal one should was not something a sane individual should be even consider mostly because of the deadly nature of such development.
Still, that didn't mean that the very predicament didn't leave plenty of understanding about not engaging in these kinds of activities, at least those that could potentially see her killed, and urge her to be a little more collected over problems instead of trusting negative emotions.
So… why did the boy want this overly-excessive escalation to fall upon her if he was perfectly aware of her inner wisdom?
Maybe because you did something dumb despite having the incredible chance of making some smart decisions?
Her consciousness was mostly correct in proclaiming doubt about her 'rightful indignation', she was still at fault for having gone berserk against a… Berserker.
Truly not a smart thing considering the effectiveness of her abilities was achieved from long distances, as pointed out by the 'Archer-Class' Card that she used for those kind of fights.
...Maybe she should really think about this after this punishment was over.
But while her brain would logically pursue the 'waiting tactic', her current maelstrom of emotions weren't so kind to not starting to list down any proper retaliation over this utter humiliation.
Recess was a little mercy from this maddening torture, or at least Kuro had seen it like that before Irisviel decided to spend much more time with her during this little pause from lessons.
The woman was all the kind of lovely and sweet, but the insistence and the pestering were starting to seriously grate at her already-limited patience.
One thing is being an over-bearing parent, another was doing it on purpose.
It was so blatant for Kuro to notice that and yet it was actually surprising how nobody else had failed to see this little act behind the smiles thrown around by the older Einzbern.
The class had been mostly empty, many of the students waiting by the corridors for the beginning of the next subject and both Illya and Miyu had decided to follow the examples of their friends at Homurahara, leaving just Irisviel and Kuro to chat privately.
"So, how are you doing with the festivity, sweetie?" The woman inquired with a hint of sarcasm, something that got a faux chuckle out of the girl.
"Haha, very funny," The tanned Einzbern replied with a scowl. "Seriously, you could at least try to appear genuinely naive instead of-"
"And miss the cute little grumpy self you are right now?" She mirthfully interrupted with another question. "But if I have to be honest, I guess I just want to take proper part to this punishment."
The girl blinked. "But why?"
"Why? Well, let's just say that little Shinji-kun, being a smart and intelligent boy, decided to tell me a little more about your quarrel with the Berserker-card holder."
...Did the room's temperature lower or was this the prelude of something scary?
"I-Iris-"
"Nope~! You don't have the prerogative for a plea, especially with the foolish decision to attack someone without much of a plan," The woman replied calmly, seemingly unfazed by the worrying circumstance she was bringing up in that very discussion. "At least I know that Shinji-kun does keep a constant watch over you… even when he should have been resting his little episode out."
"Did he tell you about-"
"The pollution? He was keen to know if Kiritsugu had ever faced something even similar to his case," Irisviel continued, this time her posture relaxing in a somewhat serious look. "He mentioned that Touko Aozaki will be coming tomorrow, so I assume that he plans to do something about his body."
Kuro merely nodded at this, rendering the plausible theory truth while she contemplated over the news.
Shinji had told her that he had been 'consulting' with some experts that could have given him some more insight over the problem, but to think that he would just ask for advice from Kiritsugu was… quite concerning.
Not because the two were not in a good relationship, but because the young Matou wouldn't generally risk giving too much about himself out so… suddenly and without hesitation.
"And here is that worried look I was expecting to find at mentioning this issue."
Chloe blinked in surprise when a giggle left Irisviel's lips.
"What?"
"Back in the swimming pool, after we had our little discussion over Shinji, I felt like something was missing from the puzzle," The woman kindly explained with a polite tone. "It just felt so odd for someone with a fierce and distrustful personality as yours to just… trust him more than… family."
A blink, then two as she took a little breath about the matter.
It didn't take too much thinking for the girl to understand the little pain coming from that situation.
And it wasn't actually anyone's fault but fate itself, there was no 'family' for Kuro.
As much as she tried to imagine a life with them, it wouldn't just be the same.
Even though she was the original 'Illya', she had long been replaced by someone much more 'normal' and easy to adapt to their current lifestyle, it would have been just a big, fat lie to have 'something' happen because… she looks just like her.
And the worst part? Considering her current body, it would have been awkward to explain in a few years why their eighteen-year old tanned niece looked just like a young teen.
Touko could fix this, her problem wasn't big enough to create any issues in producing a better-quality body to host her soul and the only cost would be losing the high-affinity with the Archer Card.
She would still use it, she would probably recover the mastery overtime, but the card wouldn't have the same hold it has over her.
There wouldn't be that persisting sense of inadequacy that was so well-ingrained in EMIYA's perception of things, that inability to understand the big picture without also getting drained by the toll of his own actions.
She would stop feeling like a hopeless and purposeless scabbard, lying there without neither the original drive nor promised future to a simple red-haired fool.
"I suppose… Shinji is just more meaningful to me-"
"And he thinks the same if not more about you by the way he keeps you close while walking around," Irisviel giggled quietly at that. "I suspect that you are aware of that already."
Kuro-tan.
A smile squirmed on her face, a furious blush almost exploding at that very memory but she couldn't just allow this to be seen.
It was her secret. For now, at least.
"I do."
"Then I have to ask," She then continued with a curious expression. "Do you think that you will follow him… back to his original dimension?"
...What?
For a brief moment, Kuro was brought before a question she had long tried to not think about.
What happens once everything is done here? What will Shinji do, will he take them with him or… be forced to leave them here?
Albeit Justeaze's perspective of the Kaleidoscope was limited, the little she knew mostly about was that…
Large-scale alterations were forbidden to happen.
A stronger force than Alaya and Gaia existed within the lines of the macroverse, safely securing the stability for all those dimensions existing within its infinite space and time.
Zelretch had only mentioned about its existence, a creature of immeasurable power that defied even the standards of the Types.
So what would happen if Shinji and Luvia decided to take the entire group back to his universe?
Two scenarios were the highest possible, especially considering all elements about the matter itself:
1) The two can't take them all and someone will have to be left behind, or worse everyone will have to be left back to avoid major repercussions for everyone alive;
2) Justeaze was unsure about the rules behind the Kaleidoscope, the uncertainty and lack of proof going as far as denying her a genuine depiction of the Second Magic, if the magic itself was an act of defiance against this unknown being or something that permitted an extensive maneuvering for the practitioners of such art.
The latter one was the one she hoped for it to be correct, being denied the chance of following Shinji was… worrisome. At least.
There was no doubt that he had given her a purpose- or better, a pleasant perception of life as someone that was as human as everyone.
She wasn't a byproduct of some fragments of a girl's mind and a Magecraft-born Servant Card. She wasn't EMIYA, nor his darker self.
But she wasn't Illyasviel von Einzbern and she wasn't Justeaze Lizrich von Einzbern.
She was Kuro and Chloe von Einzbern, she was a fourteen-years old girl that has to deal with a predicament far worse than the classic Magical Girl dilemma.
It was much worse, so worse that she couldn't help but consider it impossible for someone like Illya or Miyu to survive in her circumstances, to live a half-life that was only sustainable because someone decided to care.
Would it have happened if Shinji and Luvia hadn't been there to notice her? Would it have mattered to anyone the need to find a solution to her own problems?
Would have she mattered if someone hadn't genuinely asked 'Are you okay?'?
There wasn't going to be an answer for this question. Not just for her own sanity, but for the safety of those blissfully unaware of her plight.
"I would follow him."
"But what if there is no-"
"I would follow him," Kuro repeated with a sterner tone. "If there is someone trying to block me from going forward, then I will have to make some harsh decisions over it."
"Even if it's your mother asking to?"
Another pause, this time her mind needed the opportunity to think how to answer to that terrible trap in front of her.
Was it fair? The world wasn't and she had expected this to happen from the very moment that early question had popped up.
"Do you understand that the only thing that connect us is… my appearance?" Chloe replied with a mindful approach. "I'm not Illya and I refuse to be considered her anymore. Not because I hate her, but rather I know that it would be painful for the two of us."
Amber eyes glanced at the saddened expression on the woman's face. "You are her mother, she loves you a lot. You love her a lot but when you see me, you shouldn't see her in me."
"B-But I don't," The older Einzbern said quickly. "I consider you as Chloe, another daughter-"
"I think you are misunderstanding my words."
Red eyes widened in surprise at that calm but cold interruption.
"W-What?"
"When I say 'Illya', I'm not just talking about the girl that is currently enjoying the fresh years of her teenage life," Kuro continued with a polite voice. "I'm referring to Illya as a whole. From the beginning to now, from infancy to elementary school, from what I remember to now."
… "Y-You mean that-"
"As much as it pains me and… I did contemplate about this a lot of time- I think it's best to cut the toxic connection and just ignore Illya's childhood as a mean to bond over."
"B-But- Was it Shinji-"
"Don't," The tanned girl interrupted again, this time sighing tiredly. "Just… don't bring him into this, as if he is guilty of giving me the time to think and… it wasn't even just a little amount of time. He granted me until now and even beyond, there isn't a limit to this chance to think about my own decisions."
A sigh, then two, her breathing was slowly bringing her to hyperventilation, she didn't need that.
Breath in, breath out.
"When I woke up, my two main emotions were anger and confusion," Kuro admitted with a frown. "I was angry that my name felt so wrong, and I was confused as to why it did felt so foul to even label me as such. Why would I despise my origin? Why would I even feel wronged by that name and… the reason is that it was killing my novel existence."
The girl tapped at the desk's wooden texture. "I wasn't born in November 20thj 1990, I was born in July 20thj 2004. My parents are not Kiritsugu Emiya and Irisviel von Einzbern, and my life is barely tied to the Emiya family only because of the card that makes me… me!"
"The Card?"
...Shinji didn't tell her. Irisviel didn't know about-
She sighed, preparing to give a proper talk this time.
"When you look at Shirou, what do you see?"
Her surprised look extended at that sudden question. "He- He is a normal young man. A little clumsy but-"
"He was not like this from where this Heroic Spirit that houses the card came from. He was a young orphan because a grand fire that destroyed a large section of Fuyuki ten years ago, his only parent was a dying Kiritsugu Emiya. He lived with PTSD and Survivor's Guilt, he faced a Fifth Holy Grail War, winning it and trying his best to become a Hero of Justice," She explained quickly and with little mentioning of the fling he had with Saber, the fact that Illya had been the Lesser Grail and… other messes about it all. "Do you want to know the name of the Hero?"
The older Einzbern didn't reply, her eyes were already showing some suspicion over the possible name and… Kuro spoke again.
"His name is Counter-Guardian EMIYA, his former name is Shirou Emiya and… he died an empty man's death."
There was more silence, some legitimate quiet after the enunciation of those words and… Kuro stood up and started to walk away.
"W-Where are you going, Kuro-chan?"
The girl paused by the door, blinking for a moment before glancing back at the woman.
"I don't want to be here, I think I have a small fever and… I don't really want to deal with this unnecessary punishment."
"B-But what about Shinji-"
"I will accept any other punishments from him if he think I need more," The tanned Einzbern continued unfazed. "But for now I don't have the willpower to deal with this shenanigans. Just not now."
The door close silently, leaving a sad, confused and immensely drained Irisviel Einzbern to pick the pieces of her hopes to have a greater family.
Did she expect this to happen? She may have thought it a possibility… but she hadn't been ready to deal with the onslaught it presented.
And now that it was all over… it was best to take a pause and understand what truly went wrong with this.
And why is the card so important for her daughter.
AN
Despite having planned to make it a longer chapter, I decided to stop myself from putting in another perspective for the sake of not ruining the little speech given by Kuro.
I know I've been throwing some mad 4-5k words' chapters but I think this one will give the most by 'standing alone' instead of being part of a two-perspectives situation.
I think I put everything I personally consider saddening about Kuro. There was no genuine interest in helping her current conditions, heck the series try to pass it as something that could be just ignored but… that just is even more sad. Imagine the fact that, since her body isn't a real one, she will never age. She will never grow up to genuinely represent a real girl like the 'real Illya' and she is forced to be in that family.
She loves them, dearly so, but that would only end up in pain. Yes, I think that the most tragic figure in Prillya isn't Miyu, but Chloe.
P.S. Speaking of tragic figures, I've uploaded the first chapter of a rarity for JoJos story. A SI with Dio… starting by early Phantom Blood. Why is it a rarity? There is no SI about Dio… like really.
I will upload the link in the signature in the forums and you can find it in FF as 'Absolute Divinity', it has Chibi Young!Dio as main image.
P a treon . com (slash) socialistbukharin
k o-fi . com (slash) justbukharin
REVIEW Q&A!
LukeSky001: Erika-tan is quite the adorable villain. She is trying her damnest to bring the 'evil out of Shinji' that she fails to understand the futility and… next chapter will have some screen-time for a proper development out of this escalation.
Redaer Copious: Yep, that is indeed the case!