Chapter Forty: Breaking Point

When Bonnie reopened her eyes she found herself in a dark room. At first she didn't recognize where she was, all she knew was that she felt happy and warm inside but there was something else. She needed to be somewhere.

With shock she rose up in bed, only then realizing that she might wake Kai up, who was still lying next to her, fast asleep. She looked down on him to check if she interrupted his rest only to find him lying calm and relaxed next to her. Her gaze rested on him for a while, a smile build on her face. He looked so cute and innocent when he was sleeping that it warmed Bonnie's heart seeing him like this. She gave herself another few seconds to appreciate him before she carefully slipped out of bed and got dressed, always careful not to wake him.

After that she searched for a paper and a pen and wrote him a letter, explaining her leave without waking him and telling him she would call him when she got to Mystic Falls. She checked the time only to realize it was only 11:15 p.m. When she got home there was a good chance her mom wouldn't ask any weird questions about her being away all night. She grabbed all her remaining stuff and tiptoed to the door. Casting one last look at the sleeping form of Kai, Bonnie couldn't hold back a small sigh and a tingling feeling in her stomach before she snuck out his room and out the house to drive back home and get herself ready for her trip to Mystic Falls.

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She got home, checked off the last things on her to do list before she left for Virginia and quickly went to bed. She was tired like hell but she couldn't stop her heart from beating like hell. The memories of what happened between her and Kai were freshly caved into her mind and made her grin like a freaking moron. She really had to get that under control if she didn't want to let everyone know form just one look at her that she was hiding something important. It wasn't that she didn't want to tell people but she wanted to wait until she had a proper talk with Kai about this night before she went running around telling everyone how happy she was. She might have felt the importance of this night pretty clearly but she also knew Kai and his way of hopping form one decision to another, changing his mind like other people changed underwear, especially when feelings were involved.

So she would wait, very patiently, until in a few days they would have the talk. And Bonnie would insist this time that they actually had it. A sigh cut through the darkness as she remembered the last time Kai and her were at this point and how everything went downhill after he found out about her arrangement with Bright. She just hoped that this time, there was nothing thrown in their way.

Bonnie closed her eyes now. In just a few short hours she would have to get up and go to the airport. Right now, she was at a low point in not wanting to go to her hometown. Not even the prospect of seeing Caroline would make her see the bright sight of this. Not if the alternative would be sleeping in Kai's strong arms right now and spending the entire weekend drowning herself in him. She would have to call him every free minute, he was going to think she was crazy but she didn't mind. She wanted him to know exactly how much she wanted to be with him rather than her family.

Her thoughts kept spinning around this topic for a while longer before her eyes finally fell closed and she fell into a dreamless, very short-lived sleep.

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Just landed safely. Want to come back already

Bonnie pressed the sent button the moment she landed in Virginia. On the plain, she tried to sleep but this kind of reminded her of how she finally talked to Kai the first time last year. She never knew why he had been on that plane that day and she made a mental note to ask him once she was back.

Strapping her bag over her shoulder she headed to the exit where her grandmother was already waiting for her. She offered her an honest and big smile before she hugged the older woman. Her grandmother would drive her straight to her father. The party was about to start in a few hours and her father had wanted to spent some quality time with his immediate family, that included her grams. The closer they got to his place the more Bonnie's unwillingness rose. Her grandmother picked up on that immediately.

"Child, what's on your mind?"

"Nothing grams, I just… had to think about some things I have to deal with back in Portland and how inconvenient this trip it right now."

Her grams tzed. "This is your father's birthday, young girl. Show a little more delight once you are in front of him."

Bonnie scoffed. "Yeah, of course, grams."

A little silence followed until grams asked her another question.

"So, these things back in Portland, any chance they might have to do with some boy?"

This woman had to be psychic; there was no other explanation for why she usually knew what was going on with Bonnie by just looking at her. Bonnie tried to avoid a stupid smile spreading across her face because she wanted to stick to her decision to keep what happened to herself, but her grandmother was making it so hard for her. So she decided to say nothing at all and turned her reddening face towards the window.

"Ah, I see. A young girl likes to keep secrets." Grams said in a joyful tone. "Don't worry, I won't mention your apparent reason to be such a happy little cupcake again. I just hope that he is finally worth all your emotions, Bonnie. Oh, and one more thing, if you don't want your father to notice that your happiness is because of that boy, you should dim the freshly lit light just a little bit. No one will believe you when you say the reason you're so happy is because of your old man's special day."

Bonnie gave her grandmother a sharp glance before she smiled once more. She didn't say anything, but she knew her grandmother had understood what her smile was about and she was glad. Now she only had to work on the blowing part of her appearance so that she could keep her secret.

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"Bonnie, there you are!"

"Elena?"

Her best friend was running towards Bonnie when she entered her father's garden after greeting him at the door and giving him his birthday-hug. The next thing she saw was brunette hair framing her view. Bonnie reluctantly hugged Elena back, surprised to find her at her dad's place. She knew that Caroline wanted to try and visit today, but she never heart from Elena.

When Elena finally let go of Bonnie the surprise was still written all over her face. "Why are you here?" Bonnie asked, trying not to sound rude.

"Well, I know this is supposed to be family only, but we basically are family now, right Bon? Stefan insisted that I would come along." Elena stated and only then Bonnie noticed all he strange people gathering in her father's garden.

There was Stefan, talking to a slightly older guy with slightly darker hair then himself but an awkward overall resemblance, that Bonnie had never seen before. And there was grams headed towards a woman with dark red hair who was in her early forties maybe. Finally the penny dropped and Bonnie face-palmed herself.

"Oh, how could I not think about this? Of course Lily Salvatore would be at my dad's birthday. Gosh, I'm such a dumbass." She turned to look at Elena. "Sorry, everything makes sense now. I am really glad you're here by the way."

Elena smiled and Bonnie returned it when she noticed Stefan heading their way.

"Hey, the lost daughter is back in town. Good to see you again, Bonnie." He greeted her.

"Hi, Stefan." Bonnie waved at him, trying very hard to look as neutral as she could, even though a feeling of distaste crept up her stomach. But she needed to try to overcome this feeling. After all Stefan was kind of her stepbrother now, so she needed to try liking him not only for Elena's sake, but also for herself.

When Stefan approached them he stopped right behind Elena and put one arm around her waist. The way Elena reacted to his presence, the way her face lit up and the warmth in her eyes in combination with this smile, gave Bonnie shivers and the wish to have the same. The same reaction to someone she cared about, in public, and said someone looking at her just the way Stefan now looked at Elena.

Suddenly, the urge to check her phone to see if Kai texted back was so strong that she was about to turn around to get it out of her bag before her father joined the group.

"I see you are getting along very well. That's nice." Rudy said and behind him, the woman with long red hair, Lily Salvatore, smiled warmly at Bonnie. "Bonnie, I want you to officially meet Lily. Lily, that's my daughter Bonnie."

"It is so nice to finally meet you, dear." Lilly said and reached out to Bonnie's hand, squeezing it reassuringly.

"It's a pleasure." Bonnie said honestly and smiled back at the beautiful woman. She really was happy that her father had found someone knew. Even though she was… reserved towards her son, to put it mildly, she really wanted to like this woman. And she really wanted this to work, for Lily and her father.

After a quick chat, Lily excused herself because she wanted to look after the food in the kitchen. Her father crept a little closer and watched Bonnie intensely. "So, what do you think?"

"I like her, dad. She seems nice. I'm happy for you." Bonnie smiled and touched Rudy's arm to stress her statement.

"Good, that's a relief." Rudy laughed. "And what about the boys? I see you were already bonding with Stefan."

"Well, I wouldn't call it bonding." Bonnie answered, not able to keep her annoyance out of her voice. Her father looked at her questioningly, so Bonnie explained. "I'm not gonna lie to you dad, but I don't particularly like Stefan. I accept him as Elena's new boyfriend but that's all I can do. I am not ready to accept him as my new brother just yet. I need more time."

"I understand." Rudy nodded. "Well, maybe you'll have better luck with Damon." Rudy nodded to the guy Bonnie had noticed earlier and when Bonnie followed his movement with her gaze and spotted Damon Salvatore watching her with a dirty smirk and his eyebrows doing weird stuff in the meantime, a shiver went down her spine, but not in the best way.

"Yeah, maybe." Bonnie tried to sound confident. "Excuse me, dad. I have to get something." She turned around and left her "family" behind in the big garden.

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If she thought she couldn't stand Stefan Salvatore, she had no idea what kind of an angel he was compared to his older brother Damon. His arrogant and overly cocky self was hitting something deep within Bonnie that was usually only reserved for racists, liars and her former history teacher Mr. Tanner. She nearly added arrogant jerks to that list but then she realized that apparently she was rather liking that type, seeing how much she liked Kai. But Damon Salvatore was just not her type of person.

Elena and Stefan seemed to agree with her on that one, because whenever he was around them they thought of another stupid reason to leave and avoid him. Bonnie had hoped that she would be able avoid meeting the older Salvatore brother at all, because the day had turned out to not be as great as she was feeling when it began and the reason for that might be the fact that Kai hadn't texted her back yet. It had been over 4 hours now, the party was in full mode and all Bonnie did was trying not to punch Damon in his ugly blue-eyed face and check her phone.

She even snug into the house to try and call him, but it only rang two times before she was redirected to his voice mail. What on earth was going on? She left a few more massages, trying to sound as cool as possible when inside she was starting to get nervous. Did Kai change his mind yet again?

"Earth to Bonnie?!" Elena's voice reached her ears.

"Heh?"

"What's going on?"

"Nothing." Bonnie looked back at the dark screen of her phone in her hand when she noticed Elena moving over from the chair that she had occupied next to Stefan to sit next to Bonnie on the bench.

"Don't lie to me, Bonnie. You've been absent ever since you arrived here. First I thought there was something happier about you, but now… you seem sad. Tell me."

Bonnie had decided that maybe she could break her silence treaty for Elena when a familiar female high-pitched voice reached them. "Tell her what?"

Caroline dropped down next to Bonnie and smiled a bright smile. "Hey girls."

Bonnie embraced Caroline in a tight hug at once, pressing her friend close. "Care, you made it." Bonnie said, fighting back any trace of uneasiness she currently felt.

Caroline hesitantly patted her back. "Okay, what's going on with her?" Caroline asked Elena and Bonnie let go of her.

"That's what I was about to find out." Elena stated and Bonnie rolled her eyes.

"Guys, I'm fine." Bonnie lied because in that moment she realized Stefan was eying the three friends.

A quick look from Caroline and she immediately understood. "Why don't we go for a walk?" she suggested while standing up, nearly dragging Bonnie along. Elena followed her example and together they pushed Bonnie to their formed secret hide-out in the far corner of the garden, the sounds of the party now dimmed down to a background noise.

"Now, Bennett. Spill!" Caroline demanded bossily.

Bonnie sighed but she knew there was nothing she could do now, so she told them about the last couple weeks and last night and the fact that Kai hadn't texted her back yet.

Caroline and Elena listened to her yammering. Elena nodded occasionally and Caroline asked questions to get the full picture. In the end, they came to the same conclusion Bonnie had come to hours ago: she had to talk to Kai. Wandering back to the party, Bonnie realized how much better she felt now that she had talked to someone about it. Realization hit her that she might never be able to have a secret boyfriend, because she would run around asking people for advice when something happened that she didn't know how to deal with. But what where best friends for, right?

Back at the centre of the party, Bonnie had to avoid Damon once more. Elena rolled her eyes and when they reached their table, Bonnie turned to Stefan and confronted him about his weird older brother. Elena seemed to be content about Stefan's and Bonnie's ongoing discussion about the older Salvatore and soon the talk turned away from Damon to other topics and Elena and Caroline were included into the conversation. Maybe Bonnie had been wrong about Stefan after all. She wouldn't go as far as thinking that they were friends but maybe she could come to think of Stefan as an acquaintance.

The next few hours Bonnie danced and laughed alongside her friends, pretending that everything was alright, but never loosing the weird feeling in her gut that something wasn't right.

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The next day she spent eating breakfast with her father and grandmother. Checking her phone every 10 minutes. Nothing.

After that she met up with Caroline and Elena for a quick coffee in the Mystic Grill, saying her goodbyes. When she checked her phone there was a notification on her screen. A message from her mother. Bonnie sight. Not the text she had been waiting for. Other than that, nothing.

After meeting Care and Elena she went back to her dad's to pack her stuff. When she was done she tried calling Kai. Nothing. Straight to voice mail like the day before.

The feeling of anger mixed into the feeling of worry. What the hell was he doing? Was he okay? What did he think he was doing to her? It was weird he didn't pick up the phone. She wasn't going to let him toy with her again. Should she call Jo?

Bonnie shook her head. There was nothing she could do now, so she grabbed her stuff and went to see her dad who was driving her to the airport.

Right before she was heading into the plane, she checked her phone once more. Nothing.

Wow, that boy could brace himself for some attitude when she saw him in school tomorrow. IF she saw him in school that was. Bonnie had no idea whether he would even show up. 'We will see.' Bonnie thought, turned the flight-mode on and disappeared into the plane.

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The next morning, Bonnie was putting extra effort into her styling. She had decided to be angry first and worried later and she wanted to show him the cold shoulder, showing him just how hard that was. Looking extra good would only add to his frustration, she was sure.

So when she entered the school, deliberately only a few minutes before class would start, she had to look through a bunch of school kids to see if she could spot Kai anywhere. She didn't expect to because he was only rarely showing up for the first lesson, so she was a little surprise to find him standing by his opened locker, putting stuff into his bag. Bonnie prepared for her nonchalant act while she was headed his way.

"Hey stranger, nice to see you are still among the living." Bonnie said with a little spite in her voice.

Kai didn't even look up to her, still busy searching for something in his locker.

Bonnie's anger rose. He was supposed to pay attention to her, while she was trying to be angry with him, so she waved a hand in front of his face. "Hello? Anyone home?"

Kai visibly tensed next to her, straightening his back. He slowly turned around and when Bonnie looked into his face, she was shocked. All her anger was immediately replaced by worry. He looked horrible. Deep bags under his eyes, looking pale and his hair was a bit messier than usually but the worst thing were his eyes. Where she usually found sparks of mischievousness or amusement- or hell anger- was…nothing. Those beautiful blues were looking at her and there was not a single emotion she could spot in them.

"Oh my god, are you okay?" Bonnie asked and stepped a bit closer, reaching out her hand to cup his face but he withdrew from her touch. Bonnie poised in her position, shock both from Kai's general appearance and from this reaction to her sparking to life within her. Kai, turned back around, saying nothing, which made Bonnie even more worried.

"Hey! I can see there is something going on with you. You can talk to me." Bonnie tried once more.

Kai puffed air out of his nose and Bonnie realized that he was getting annoyed. She saw him roll his eyes. At least there was some kind of reaction in them now, even though Bonnie didn't like what she saw either. Her anger resurfaced, not as heavy as before but still.

"So, you don't text for an entire weekend. Alright, I can handle that, I'm mature enough to not think that I am the centre of the universe. You don't answer my calls either. Well, yeah I should take a hint right? Then you even decline my calls, that's something that is really pissing me off, you know? But you know what pisses me off the most? When I am standing right in front of you and you ignore me like I am some stupid stalker girl you have never met before. What did I do now, that would explain your childish behavior?" Bonnie ranted.

"Nothing." Was Kai's only response to that and Bonnie's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Really? That's all you're gonna give me?"

"Pretty much." Kai turned around and slammed his locker shut. He started walking and Bonnie tried to follow.

"Okay, what the hell is going on? There has to be some rational explanation for your behavior. Because if there is nothing I did to piss you off then it has to have something to do with you! So, as your friend, which last time I checked I still was, I demand to hear what is going on with you."

Kai suddenly stopped and turned around to her. "Can you for one second just shut up? Only because you don't get the answer that you want doesn't mean you have the right to nag everyone about it for the rest of eternity. Sometimes when someone tells you there is nothing going on, then that is the simple truth, Bonnie. So go and search for another charity case of the day, because I won't be it." With that he turned back around and left her speechless. Within seconds he was lost in the crowd and Bonnie was still standing in the middle of the hallway. Some other students watched her with pity but she quickly shook her head and caught herself, starting to walk to her class.

This had been the weirdest encounter with Kai Parker ever. And that says a lot, considering who she was talking about. He was just so unpredictable. But still, the weird feeling that had started to build up inside of her since her father's birthday party was getting stronger and stronger. She didn't want to but she was worried about Kai. Something was off, she knew it but of course he wouldn't tell her. She bet that the thing that was wrong was also the same thing that kept him from reaching out to her on the weekend.

Bonnie shook her head. As long as he didn't tell her what was going on, she couldn't help him. And as long as he didn't tell her, she would stay angry, she told herself, even though she was already feeling her anger fade away.

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She didn't see him again that day. After school she went into the city and bought a few things her mother asked her to get on her way home. She was already annoyed from the day and didn't have too much enthusiasm left when her mother texted her the list of things to get.

But she did it anyway and now that she had her own car, it wasn't even that effortful. When she exited the drug store, she spotted a familiar looking figure on the other side of the road.

"Hey Jo." Bonnie yelled across the street and ran over to greet her friend. Jo, turned around and spotted Bonnie running her way. "Hey, Bon."

"Funny meeting you here." Bonnie said breathlessly. "I didn't see you in school to… oh my god, Jo, what's wrong?" When Bonnie spotted the face of her friend, she ultimately knew there was something major going down in the Parker family. Jo's eyes were filled with sorrow and pain and the bags under her eyes matched the ones she had spotted on Kai's face earlier.

Jo didn't answer right away, she only looked at her with sadness and exhaustion. Bonnie came closer and hugged her friend that seemed like she was on the wedge of crying. "Jo, tell me what's going on." Bonnie said softly.

Jo sniffed and when Bonnie let go of her, watching her firmly, she started to talk. "Have you seen Kai?"

"Yeah, I… I saw him this morning in school but only for a second, he disappeared before the first lesson. Why?"

"He was at school of all places?" Jo placed a hand over her forehead and looked upset.

"Jo, what's going on?" Bonnie pleaded. Jo returned her gaze back to Bonnie and saw her concern.

She sighed and her eyes filled with tears again. "It's mom… she- she-is dying."

Bonnie felt like someone just hit her head with a plank. She felt numb and she couldn't imagine what Jo and Kai must be feeling right now. "Oh, Jo." She hugged her again. "I am so sorry."

Jo hugged her back and when she let go of her, Bonnie saw the tear strands on her face before she wiped them away. "It all happened so fast. She wasn't doing so good but Friday night, Dad called an ambulance and she has been in the hospital since. Kai woke me up that night and we took care of the kids while dad went with her. In the morning we were supposed to go visit her but Kai never came along. I haven't seen him since and he is not answering his phone. I'm really worried about him. I know he's not good at dealing with this but I can't help him if I don't know where he is. But I can't go search for him because I need to take care of so much stuff right now and I need to be with my mom and…" Jo's voice broke once more and a sob escaped her.

"Don't worry about Kai. I will find him. I promise."

Jo looked at her with hope. "Would you do that?"

"Of course, Jo. If there is anything I can do to help right now, I will."

"Bonnie, I really don't want to ask this of you…"

"… you're not, I'm offering. I'll go look for Kai and you go back to your family." Bonnie interrupted her. Jo nodded and hugged her once more.

"Thank you, Bonnie."

Bonnie nodded and Jo started to move away but turned around once more. "Bonnie, you really have to find him. He has to say goodbye, otherwise… he will never forgive himself."

Bonnie smiled a reassuring smile. "I will."

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She only tried calling him once and it went straight to voicemail. After that she tried to rethink his steps by starting at the school. She searched the roof, one of his favorite places in the school but even when she climbed all those steps she was sure that she wouldn't find him there.

Now she was standing on the top of her school looking down on the parking lot. There was no other car parked there but her own. It wasn't surprising. She never thought that he would stay at school when he was feeling lost.

So Bonnie went back to her car and drove around, stopping by every place she ever went with him, restaurants and cafés, parks and even the pool. She even tried one of these only tracking services but apparently his phone was turned off. She worried more and more the more places she didn't find him. Lost in her thoughts she drove to the only place she knew he would go. The situation was really hard. Bonnie didn't have any experience in dealing with death. All her close friends and family members were still alive. A distant cousin of hers died a few years back, but she only saw her twice and never had a relationship with her, so she did grief.

And none of her friends ever lost anyone close to them either, so she didn't know how to behave. What she did know was that she needed to be there for Kai now. He clearly struggled with all this, of course he did.

The anger she had felt during the day for his recent behavior was completely gone. At least she had an explanation now for his radio silence, even though it didn't come from him. But was she supposed to be mad at him for that? No, she wouldn't. It all made sense now, the way he acted this morning, him yelling at her for no reason and his unwillingness to speak at all when he usually wouldn't even shut up while he was sleeping.

Bonnie reached the spot where she parked her car the last time she was at this place. She was a little disappointed when she didn't see any other car parked there and almost didn't want to get out and see if he was still there. But maybe he didn't drive his car. She hadn't asked Jo about that, so there was still the possibility that he was. She hoped he would, because if he wasn't here, then Bonnie had no idea where else to look.

Stepping out of the car and making her way down to the shore of the lake, she looked around for any kind of sign of Kai. The sun was already setting, bathing the beautiful setting in an orange tone. It was way too beautiful for how she was feeling inside.

She got more nervous the closer she got his favorite spot and right before she reached the shore of the lake she inhaled deeply, afraid she might find the spot empty. When the shore came into view, she immediately spotted the figure sitting on the bench by the water. His back was facing her so he didn't notice her arrival. Bonnie stopped for a second, the relief she was feeling overwhelming her for a moment, before she resumed her step. He was wearing the same clothes as this morning in school, black hoodie and grey jeans. Kai was facing the water, watching the sunset. On any other day, he might have looked dreamy but Bonnie knew better.

Before she reached him she made herself audible by clearing her throat. Kai didn't look away from the spot he was facing and so Bonnie sat down a few inches from him, watching the calm surface of the water. They sat like this for long minutes until Bonnie turned her head to face him.

He might not have looked like it to anyone who didn't know him, but Bonnie knew him better than anyone, except for Jo maybe, and she saw the desperation, hurt and sorrow that came apparent on his face. She moved closer to him and carefully put her head onto his shoulder. She wanted to hug him but she didn't know if he would want that right now, so to show him some kind of reassurance she decided for the least body contact that would also represent the relationship they were having, even though she wasn't sure about that either right now.

After another few minutes of sitting like this, Bonnie turned her face so she could look up to him. He was looking at his hands now that were folded in his lap. Bonnie reached out her own hand and placed it over his, squeezing them reassuringly. When his head spun around to her, she put a small smile on her face and said "Hi."

He only looked at her, not answering. But he didn't draw back from her reaching out and that was a good sign.

"How did you know where I was?" Kai finally asked, his voice sounding hoarse like he hadn't talked in days.

"I didn't. I was hoping I would find you here."

"Why?"

"Because I ran into Jo and she told me what happened. I just wanted to make sure you're okay." Bonnie said while sitting back up, but leaving her hand over his.

"Well, I'm not. So you can go back now." Kai's voice sounded tired and thus his comment lacked it's usual spite. He didn't really mean what he said.

"I'm not gonna leave here alone, Kai. You're aware of that, right?" Bonnie said softly and her free hand reached out to slightly caress his cheek. "Come on, let's get you home."

Kai shook his head. "No, I'm not going home."

Bonnie sighed. "The hospital then. You need to be with your family right now."

Kai stood up and walked a little towards the shore. "I don't need to do anything."

This was his inner conflict, Bonnie knew. It was her challenge to convince him to go say goodbye to his mother now. "Kai-"

"No, don't even try, Bonnie. I know what I am doing and trust me when I'm telling you I don't want to be with my family right now, I mean it." Kai turned around to watch Bonnie. There was nothing angry on his face, he had no power to produce such a strong feeling when he was overwhelmed with grief.

"Sorry, I'm not trying to push you or something, but I feel like you aren't the best judge of your own feelings right now and I feel like you really should go be with the people that care about you, that are worried about y-"

Kai came back to sit next to her, not anger but desperation was written on his face. "My mother is dying, Bonnie! I doubt that you know how that feels like. I do, and when I say that I do not want to go be around the people who are currently feeling just the same as me, because I can't handle all their grief right now, I want you to understand that."

"I do. I do understand." Bonnie said softly and her hand reached out to cup his cheek and caress it. To her surprise, Kai leaned into her touch and closed his eyes. Bonnie turned on the bench so one of her legs were hanging down each side of the bench and moved closer to Kai, her left knee brushing against his thigh. She reached out her other hand and placed it onto the other side of his face. Then she pulled him down to her, letting their foreheads rest against each other and Kai sighed heavily.

After a while he whispered. "I'm scared, Bonnie."

"I know. I'm here. I'll do whatever I can to help you through this." Bonnie whispered back. That seemed to crack Kai up. His face trailed down the side of her own until he rested his forehead in the crook of her neck, in- and exhaling audibly. Bonnie wrapped her legs around Kai's hips and embraced him further with her arms. She caressed his back and steadied him while he seemed to have loosened all his body strengths.

"What should I do, Bon? Tell me what to do." Kai mumbled against her chest.

"I can't tell you what to do. I can only tell you what I think is best for you now." Bonnie said while resting her chin on his head.

"And what would that be?"

"I think you need to listen deep inside yourself and decided whether you should go be with your mom while you still can or stay with me and at least give Jo a call or something because she is freaking out about you. But I am 100% sure, you should not be alone right now. And I also think that you should say goodbye to your mother, someday you might regret it. And if you don't want to do it for yourself, maybe you should do it for her. I know, I can't possible imagine how you must be feeling right now, but I know that this is a tough situation. I just want to consider everything. Your mom's still alive. You should be with her while you can."

A long silence was spreading between them while Kai considered her words. Bonnie was waiting for some kind of reaction and was hoping that he was going to do the right thing. Then finally she felt his head move from away from her chest. "Okay." Kai said, nodding his head.

Bonnie smiled empathically and caressed his cheek. She leaned forward and gave him a kiss on the cheek before she got up from the bench, offering her hand to him. "Come on, let's go."

Kai looked up at her and the expression on his face nearly killed her. If she described it as a lost puppy look, it would still not cover it. Reluctantly he took her hand and Bonnie pulled him to his feet. Before they started walking she pulled him in for a real hug which he returned gratefully.

When they pulled away from each other Bonnie took Kai's hand in hers and started walking to her car, afraid that if she let go of him, he might change his mind.

Author's note: Like I promised another update. Not really a happy point of my story right now.
A few thoughts on the latest TVD episode. I have to say I am super disappointed. First: No real satisfying Bonkai moment (I don't count her trapping him as a Bonkai moment because that SUCKED) and then they put him in yet another prison world? What the hell is wrong with them? He really doesn't deserve this (maybe he does but I can't think clearly when it comes to my Kai). If there were still season to come I'd say 'hurray' a way to get him back at some point, but with the series (finally) coming to an end, I'm angry that is what they went for. He should have stayed dead. I am thrown right back into the place I had been in right after the season 6 final. I am grieving my poor little sociopath. Plus, I have to say some things just don't add up. You want to tell me that two baby siphoners and psychic ex-witch are able to bent the rules on creating a prison world? The power that binds the prison world came from the leader, but there is no leader anymore. Also, how the hell did she get Kai INTO the prison world without using a celestial event? That makes no sense? He could also find a way out of there, due to his heretic abilities. This all doesn't make sense and I think it is a bit cruel to trap him in a room with only one horrible song playing. It is just my opinion and I had to tell someone about it. I am trying really hard to ignore the fact that they did this stuff. I'm going to turn back to fanfiction and my lovely Bonkai community. I hope we will stay strong even over these events and outlive our love for Kai in wonderful fictions. Thanks a lot for reading. See you next time, LiLaAir.