Chapter Fifty: Happier

"Should I really do it?" Bonnie asked skeptically with a sudden wave of panic.

"I already did it. It's your turn now." Kai said bored.

"Yes, but…"

"No but, Bon. We've discussed this hundreds of times. If you don't try you'll never know. Be brave." He encouraged her and with eyes closed she pressed the send button on the registration page of NYU. Kai gave her a peck on the cheek and mumble a 'that's my girl' before he went over to her bed and plopped down on it.

Bonnie turned in her chair to face him. They had been discussing college choices for the past 3 weeks. While Kai wasn't too excited about the topic and was relatively fast on deciding which colleges to apply to because of his father's demand to study economic science, Bonnie hadn't been so sure. So, the most part of their discussion was Bonnie's search for the right field, the right college AND their discussion about how they would handle the distance if they would end up in different cities. Kai had waved it off and told her that they'd figure it out but Bonnie kept pushing until Kai agreed that they could look after colleges that were at least within reaching distance. On the other hand, Bonnie had to promise him to apply to better colleges, too. Even though Bonnie debated that she wouldn't be able to afford such a college, Kai insisted that she'd try and apply for scholarships because she was a really smart girl and had good grades.

So, Bonnie agreed to apply to some of the schools Kai had applied to as well but they had both agreed that they would love to get into NYU. It was a perfect choice. A perfect city, the perfect major (at least for Bonnie), the perfect people around them (since Elena and Caroline applied for schools in NY as well) and most importantly they could be together. Now, that Bonnie and Kai had applied to their choice of colleges, Bonnie felt uneasy. The future was coming so fast and it scared her. More importantly it scared her that Kai didn't even seem to be the least bit scared. Maybe it was because he didn't care if he got into college or not. He didn't want to study economic science anyway.

One day, Bonnie had asked him what he wanted to do instead, and he had only replied that it didn't matter what he wanted. That night, when Bonnie was about to fall asleep, he had confessed to her that he did have an idea what he wanted to study. He wanted to become a psychiatrist. Bonnie was surprised to hear that and turned to watch him. He explained that ever since Jo was little she knew she wanted to become a doctor and Kai used to hate that idea. But something about human behavior always fascinated him and then when he was older he researched certain things and how to become a psychiatrist. He had never told anyone about it because he never realistically thought he was going to become one anyway. Bonnie had snuggled close to him that day and told him not to give up on his dream but when she had asked him if he wanted to apply to premed somewhere he said no. His father had made clear that he wouldn't pay a single penny for an education that was anything but economic science.

Now that their future was somewhere around the corner but still so uncertain Bonnie was always thinking. Sometimes Kai had to physically push her out of her mind because she was so deep in thought. She mostly worried that they wouldn't get into colleges in the same area. What if Kai got accepted at MIT and she only got into Portland State University. (Kai hadn't applied to anything in Oregon by the way because he wanted to get as far away from his father as possible.) Kai always laughed it off when she told him about her worries. 'Oh Bon, don't lose any sleep over this. It's all going to work out.' was his usual reply and Bonnie worried that it might not mean as much to him as it did to her.

But no, that couldn't be the case because they had been doing strong the past few weeks. After Kai's birthday they had spent every free minute with each other. It was like they were glued to one another. They spend more time alone in school, not eating in the cafeteria but sharing the food that Bonnie brought from home or the leftovers that Kai had made. After school they usually met, after Bonnie was done with homework. Kai used to come with her right after school and watch her do her homework because he had no intention of doing his own, but more often than not the situation quickly evolved into something heated. Because Bonnie needed to keep on track with all her school stuff she forbit Kai to meet her before she was done with it. He had pouted like a 5-year-old but he respected her choice.

That rule didn't keep them from doing nasty things though. They couldn't keep their hands off each other for too long. It was rather time consuming and exhausting. So much so, that one day a teacher asked Bonnie if everything was okay at home because she was being tired and distracted lately. Bonnie had tried to hide her blush when she explained that everything was okay and that she was only a bit stressed over college applications. Her teacher had believed her because Bonnie wasn't known for lying but when she saw Kai at the lunch break she punched him hard for being the real reason behind her tiredness. He had only asked her what she did that for and she whispered into his ear that she was mad at him for keeping her up all those nights. That led to Kai having a fit of laughter and Bonnie being pissed at him. He tried to make it up to her all day but she refused to give in. She wanted to show who was in charge of this situation but when he came over later that day and looked at her with those puppy blue eyes that made him look like the most innocent kid from the block, she jumped into his arms and let him devour her for the rest of the evening.

Right now, all she really wanted was to join Kai on the bed and snuggle close to him, feeling his strong arms around her. She always felt protected that way. But she stayed right where she was and observed her boyfriend. She had no time to just relax with him. Due to their time-consuming hanky-panky sessions she was behind schedule on a lot of things and it would get any better within the next few days as she was preparing the arrival of Elena and Caroline for her 18th birthday.

Her best friends from home were going to arrive in two days and she needed to get the guest room ready and buy all those things the three of them always loved to eat while being together. In addition to that she needed to prepare the small gathering she had organized for her birthday. She didn't want to plan a big party like she had thrown Kai because it was too time-consuming, even though she would love a big party, but she still wanted to celebrate with her closest friends. So, Elena and Caroline quickly agreed to coming over to Portland for the weekend and Jo, Faye, Liza, Perry and even Connor had agreed to come along as well. Kai had pretended that he was busy that day but the death glare that Bonnie had thrown his way was enough to show him that she didn't need him to kid around with this topic.

Yes, there was a lot to do but still she was just sitting there watching the boy of her heart play around with his phone and looking like he had all the time in the world. She envied him a little for being so careless sometimes.

She was lost in her thoughts, so she didn't even realize that Kai was watching her from his position on the bed. She startled when he spoke to her.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Bonnie looked at him again. He still had his phone in his hand but he wasn't watching it but her. His gaze was warm and there was a hint of a smile surrounding his lips. That was one of those looks that made Bonnie's knees buckle. She smiled back at him.

"Oh, nothing important. Just trying to find a way to get everything done by doing exactly nothing." She joked.

"Ahhh." Kai sat up on the bed. "Procrastination, I get it. Trust me, I have a lot of experience with this kind of thing. Let me help you with it." His smirk was saying a lot about his intentions and when he got up from the bed and started to stroll over to her, Bonnie started to get defensive.

"Oh, hell no. Keep your dirty fingers to yourself.", she said while turning around in her chair and leaning away as far as possible. It didn't help though. With one swift move, Kai turned the chair back around and caged her with his arms. His nose was touching her cheek, since she was still trying to maintain some kind of distance to him. She felt his soft lips press a kiss on her cheek before he spoke.

"Don't act like you don't like what those dirty fingers can do to you.", he whispered into her ear and Bonnie felt the blood rush to her cheeks. He was damn right, but still she had to fight to stay strong right now.

"Kai, please.", she nearly begged with eyes closed while he traced the tip of his nose along her neck. A few torturous seconds later Kai's face was in front of hers.

"Okay.", he said and placed a soft kiss on the tip of her nose. "I gotta go anyway."

Bonnie opened her eyes abruptly and looked at Kai who was straightening already, heading for his coat that lay on Bonnie's bed.

"Are you mad at me?", Bonnie accused him. Was he really going to be mad because she shut him down?

"What? No.", Kai said honestly and turned to look at her. "I just- I have stuff to do."

"Stuff?" Bonnie leaned back in her chair and watched Kai put on his coat. "Like what? It's not like you care much about responsibilities." She felt like he was not telling her the whole truth and kept her eyes stuck on him.

He sighed. "I promised Jo to accompany her to the doctor's.", Kai admitted while looking to the ground.

Bonnie eyes widened as he said it but she was too scared to ask what it was about. Kai looked back at her and his face was suddenly serious.

"She said it is just a normal checkup but she doesn't want to go alone. I can't blame her. We really don't have the best memories about doctors.", Kai continued.

"Is it still about the accident?", Bonnie finally asked and Kai nodded. "God, it feels like a lifetime ago."

"Yeah."

Bonnie went over to him and pulled him down for a kiss. She felt bad for him. The past year hadn't exactly been easy for any of them, but Kai and Jo kinda took the cake.

"Say hi to her from me, would you?", Bonnie said softly.

"I will." Kai leaned down to steal a kiss. "I'll text you." Then he turned away and left her room. She heard him say goodbye to her mother briefly before she felt his presence gone from her house. Something heavy lay around her heart now, a feeling she had gotten used to whenever he wasn't around. Bonnie sighed heavily and had to force herself to be glad for the time she now had to get things done. After all, her birthday didn't plan itself and neither did her school preparations.

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The week went by so fast that Bonnie didn't even notice too much of it. She was drowning in school stuff to do. Due to that fact, Bonnie had to meet up with some people in her class to get group projects done or study with them. Kai wasn't too happy with that because it meant he didn't get to spend his day with her. She always invited him to come along, since most of her school projects and tasks were identical to his, but Kai couldn't give less of a damn about school. That was something that Bonnie would probably never get out of him.

So, the only time they actually spend time together was during lunch. But they were never alone because Faye was dealing with the same dilemma as Kai and claimed some Bonnie-time herself. Kai seemed okay with that though.

One day, Bonnie tried to remind all her loved ones of her impending birthday gathering and was shocked when Liza and Perry were the first ones to back out. They admitted that they completely forgot about it and bought tickets for the theatre that night. When Bonnie demanded they sell them again, they only looked at each other shamefully and said they couldn't because they needed to see the play for a school project.

Bonnie had nothing to say against that. School was more important, she understood. A lot was at stake for everyone in Senior Year. At least everyone else was going to be there.

The day before her birthday, Connor was the next one to cancel. He didn't even tell it to her face, which Bonnie was most annoyed about. He texted her with the lamest of excuses 'My mom wants me to help her with something, I can't make it to your party. Sorry.'

Bonnie wanted to rage on about it but she was still busy studying geography in the library so she had to contain herself. It was Friday afternoon and there was almost no one in the library, but the librarian had been looking at her like she was going to rip pages out of books, so Bonnie quickly redirected her attention back to her work and away from her phone.

She didn't stay too much longer though because her attention was elsewhere. She quickly texted Caroline and Elena to make sure they were still up for her birthday and was relieved when they assured her to be there in the early afternoon tomorrow. At least that comforted Bonnie a little.

As she went home, she called Kai from her car. She ranted on about Connor ditching on her and Liza and Perry's bad timing. She even warned him that, if he didn't show his face tomorrow she would melt it off the next time she saw him. He only chuckled and offered to come over to her house and stay the night. That way she could make sure that he was there on her birthday. Bonnie gladly took him up on his offer and Kai arrived within the next hour.

Bonnie was already settled into bed, cuddled deep within her blanket. The smile Kai wore on his face as he saw her was a mixture adoration and mockery and Bonnie threw a pillow at him. She really didn't have the nerve to deal with his crazy now.

Kai had to promise her to be a good little boy tonight and went over to the bed and crawled underneath the blanket, wrapping his arms around her tiny body for comfort. It worked instantly, and Bonnie's body relaxed into him. That night, she drifted off into sleep pretty early.

She woke up to a grey December morning, Kai's body was dragged out next to her, his face turned away from her. With a quick look on her phone, where she was greeted with a dozen of birthday massages which she only briefly scanned, she realized that it was already 9:30 a.m. She turned around to see that Kai was still fast asleep. It was weird since they didn't go to bed too late and he usually woke up way earlier. He couldn't have had a bad night either because she usually felt it when he did. He would turn around and sit up in bed but tonight had been quiet.

Bonnie decided that Kai had had enough sleep for today and snuggled close to him, placing her head on his chest. She felt him stir a little but he remained asleep.

A sigh escaped Bonnie. How come she had to fight so hard to wake her boyfriend up when he usually woke from the slightest movement. She decided to go for sweet torture and started kissing Kai's jaw. His face moved away from her instinctively. A groan escaped him, something that she had never heard from him before. Suddenly, she fell back onto her side of the bed as Kai turned to his side, his back facing her.

Bonnie lay on her back and looked at Kai's back dumbstruck. She blinked to manage her thoughts, but she couldn't help but feel annoyed. For any possible day to sleep in Kai had chosen her birthday? She would be happy that he did that if she didn't have the perfect birthday morning planned in her head already. She would wake up in his arms (didn't happen), kiss him good morning (didn't happen), he would wish her a happy birthday (didn't happen) and they would spent a very lazy and cozy morning in bed side my side, snuggling and doing other things (didn't happen). Instead, she was lying next to a sleeping Kai who didn't seem willing to get up any time soon and thought about how to start her day now.

She sighed. For a few more minutes she lay on her back watching the ceiling and listening to Kai's even breathing. Then she got bored. She slowly emerged the bed and headed for the shower. After she got her body in birthday shape, she went downstairs to run into her mother and Jeffrey. They both wished her a happy birthday and presented her with her birthday gift, a new phone she desperately needed.

After her mother prepared tons and tons of Bonnie's favorite food, Kai finally joined her. He just plopped down next to her on the stool where she was sitting talking to her mother while she was cooking, and looked at her. He tilted his head and looked adorable, so that Bonnie realized that it didn't make any sense that she was mad at him for sleeping in. It wasn't his fault. And she never did mention how she wanted to spend her birthday morning.

He smiled at her with this breathtaking smile and all was forgotten. He leaned closer and pulled her into a deep and long kiss, which surprised Bonnie since Kai usually was restrained when other people where in the room, especially her mother. But this kiss was holding everything he was feeling for her and Bonnie didn't mind if the president of the United States was watching. Her heart was pumping fast as Kai finally pulled away. His lips still lingered on hers though.

"Happy birthday, Bonnie.", he hummed and sealed her lips with his briefly before pulling away for good. Bonnie had to control the dumb smile that was trying to spread her face, because she didn't want to look like an idiot even more than she already did.

"Thanks.", was all she could get out before she felt the gaze of her mother on her. Abby was surely entertained by the scene.

"You'll get your gift later.", Kai reported and Bonnie's head turned to him.

"What? I told you not to get me anything."

"And like yourself, I disregarded your wishes and got you something anyways. Relax, it's nothing big. It's not really a thing either."; Kai said and rolled his eyes, turning his attention to her mother. "Morning Abby."

"Good morning. You like your eggs scrambled, sweetie?", Abby asked and Kai's eyes began to glow. He loved Abby's cooking and never failed to vocalize that.

"Please."

Abby smiled lovingly at him before she turned her attention back to the stove, giving Bonnie and Kai a moment of semi-solitude.

Kai devoured his eggs like he hadn't eaten in 2 weeks. Abby only laughed when he thanked her for the food and left the two alone. Bonnie was still munching on some French Toast when she was pulled off the stool.

"I'm not done.", she complained but Kai seemed to be ignoring her. He dragged her upstairs and pulled her back into the bed, pulling her close. Bonnie was now laying on her back and Kai's head was placed on her chest, giving her the perfect angle to caress it.

Bonnie chuckled. "How are you so sleepy today?"

"Because- having you as a girlfriend is very consuming.", Kai mumbled against her skin before covering her mouth with his, making sure her complaint was stopped before it could even be properly formed in her head. The smile he was giving her when he pulled away made her forget about his teasing comment in a heartbeat.

"So, what are you planning for today?", Kai asked her.

"Well, I thought we could stay like this a while longer. Then we could head out for lunch, get Elena and Caroline and get ready for the evening."

Kai screwed up his face apologetically. Bonnie's eyes widened as she saw the reaction. "What?", she asked accusingly.

"I can't go to lunch with you.", Kai admitted and hid his face in the crook of her neck in order to avoid her temper.

"Why not? I thought we were spending the entire day with each other.", Bonnie let out disappointedly.

"We were. I mean that was the idea, but Dad called me in for babysitting duties. He's going to some work thing and can't take Briana with him. Jo is taking over the twins so she demanded of me to spend some time with Briana. I'm so sorry, but I kind can't bail on her. Don't hate me." His eyes were full of regret and Bonnie could see that he was really sorry. Even though she totally understood his position and that his family situation was difficult now, she was still disappointed. This was supposed to be the best birthday ever, because she was finally happy. But no: first her friends bail on her now her boyfriend abandons her for at least parts of the day.

"But you're gonna be there tonight?", Bonnie asked, trying to keep her emotions out of her voice to not make him feel guilty.

"Of course. I won't miss it in the world." Kai pecked her lips and Bonnie tried to avoid his eyes. She was feeling so sad right now that she had to fight back her tears. She wasn't going to cry on her birthday, she refused to do that. So, she swallowed once more and smiled back at him.

"As long as you're gonna be there tonight."

"Promise."

An hour later she was kissing him goodbye. He said he was going to check on her every now and then and would be there an hour ahead of the party for the preparations. Elena and Caroline would be there as well to help her get everything ready but she appreciated his help.

When he was gone, Bonnie plopped down on the couch in the living room where her mother and Jeffery were sitting.

"You okay, hon?", Abby asked while watching her daughter pout.

"Yeah, it's my birthday, what could be wrong?"

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The time wouldn't get by faster today. She was sitting on her bed, waiting for the time to get ready and pick up Elena and Caroline from the airport. But whenever she looked at her watch, she realized that only a few minutes had passed. In the meantime, Bonnie tried to distract herself by replying to the numerous congratulations on her phone and facebook.

Right before she was heading for the airport her phone rang and when she saw the caller ID she frowned, wondering why Caroline was calling her. She was still supposed to be on the plain.

"Hey, if this isn't out birthday girl.", she heard Caroline say and Elena's whooing in the background.

"Hey Care, hey Elena. What's up?", Bonnie asked while putting on her shoes.

"Not much.", she heard Elena say and she thought that she sounded a bit weird.

"Most certainly not out plane.", Caroline added and Bonnie froze in her movement.

"What's that supposed to mean? I thought you'll be here in a hour.", Bonnie asked.

"Well, that's the thing. We just spent like three hours in that plane and the pilot wouldn't fucking start the thing. We weren't allowed to use our phones that's why we couldn't tell you. The plane is broken somehow and they can't get it up in the air. We're still at Richmond airport and have just been led out of the plane again because there is no way it'll be flying today.", Elena explained with a sad voice.

"So, when are you guys going to be here then?", Bonnie asked.

"Well, that's the thing, Bonnie.", Caroline stammered. "They offered us another flight but it is not until tomorrow. We won't be making it to your birthday."

Bonnie stayed quiet for a long time. This was a joke, right? Her two best friends wouldn't be making it to her birthday? Could this day get any worse.

"Bonnie? Are you still there?" Elena's concerned voice rang through the speakers.

"Yeah. Still here." Bonnie couldn't keep the sadness out of her voice.

"God, Bonnie, we're so sorry.", Caroline blared out.

"I know.", Bonnie sighed. "It's not your fault."

"We tried everything we could to get other tickets, but it was impossible.", Caroline whined.

"I get it, Care. I guess, we're just going to celebrate another time."

"Oh, Bonnie. We'll be there next weekend. We are going to get tickets right now. I promise, it will feel just like your real birthday.", Elena said and Bonnie could hear some female voice announcing something at the airport.

"But you're still going to have an amazing night. We'll call Faye and tell her to make it unforgettable for you. We'll even facetime with you guys. You'll never even miss us.", Caroline suggested and without Caroline's knowledge that everyone except Faye had canceled on her already, Bonnie felt even worse now.

"Yeah, sure. I gotta go now, there is still much to be done so-", Bonnie lied because she didn't want to start crying on the phone.

"Oh, yeah sure. We're so sorry, Bonnie. Have a wonderful day. We love you and happy birthday again."

"Bye.", Bonnie simply said and hung up. Throwing her phone away. She was sitting on the stairs with one shoe already on and the other standing next to her. She pulled off her shoe and tossed it across the room, giving her frustration new room. This was the worst birthday ever. She was sitting all alone in her house- her mother and Jeffrey left early to give her enough room to prepare- looking like a total loner. Suddenly, she got furious. She jumped up, took her phone out and texted Faye that the party was canceled and that she better not be turning up on her doorstep again. Under any circumstances. She didn't want to see anyone tonight. Then she went upstairs and let herself fall into her bed.

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When Bonnie said she didn't want to see anyone, she meant literally anyone. That was why she didn't go to the front door as it rang, one and a half hours later. Bonnie imagined it must be Kai who had been texting her nonstop, but she kept ignoring him. He wasn't supposed to be here until an hour or so but her lack of communication was suspicious. Bonnie turned around on her bed, lying on her stomach and covering her head with her pillow. She was really not in the mood to see anyone.

The guest on the front door kept ringing until the sound was a constant beep in her ears and she jumped up annoyed to get to the door. She was planning on yelling at him and pushing the door shut again but when she opened it, Kai's arms were immediately in between the door frame and the door.

"What?", Bonnie blared.

"Jesus, you okay? I've been calling you but you didn't pick up."

"I'm peachy, can't you see?", Bonnie said and turned away from the door, heading back upstairs.

Kai managed to get a hold of her arm before she was halfway upstairs and turned her around to him. "Hey, what's going on?"

That was the moment Bonnie couldn't hold back her tears any longer. She broke down and sat down on the stairs, burying her head in her hands. She felt Kai sit down next to her and wrapping an arm around her protectively.

"It's the worst birthday ever.", Bonnie mumbled between sobs.

"What? Why are you saying that?"

"Because no one it coming to my party. They don't care. Elena and Caroline are stuck in Virginia and Connor and the others are too cool to keep up appearances. I wish I would have gone with my initial wish and invited the entire school, so at least someone would attend."

"But what about Faye?"

"Told Faye the party was off. I don't want to see anyone here tonight." Another hit of sobs shook Bonnie's body and Kai pulled her closer into his arms. She leaned into him, let him hold her, let him sooth her. After a while she managed to breath normally again and looked up into his face. He smiled at her sadly.

"I'm sorry, Bon." He whipped away the strands of her tears while looking down at her.

"It's not your fault."

"Still. Can I do something to make you feel better? You wanna go out or something?"

Bonnie didn't feel like going out. Even though she could at least make the best of the day that was left, she didn't feel like it. Outside it was already dark since the December light was always cut short. On a normal day she wouldn't mind that but today, she felt like she had been betrayed by everyone and everything, even the light. The sun had decided to be just like her friends, cold and absent.

Bonnie shook her head. "I just want to stay in and watch some movies with you, if that is okay?"

"Sure. Whatever you need."

They decided to call for some pizza delivery and Kai made the call a few minutes later. Bonnie was starting to get comfortable on the couch in the living room after closing all the curtains and blinds for a better cinema atmosphere, already starting Netflix to find something to watch when she heard a noise.

It was the sound of a car alarm that was getting off somewhere close. When Bonnie realized there was no other car parked outside then hers, she rolled her eyes. "You got to be kidding me."

She got off the couch and headed to the front door. She passed by Kai without a word of explanation.

"Where are you going?", Kai called after her.

"That's my car.", was Bonnie's only explanation when she opened the front door. She headed straight for her car, in hopes not to find anyone messing with it. She was in no mood for pranks like that. But when she reached it, there was no one in sight. Bonnie took a look around but couldn't find any damage on it either. But the alarm was still sounding through the streets and Bonnie had no idea how to turn it off.

Luckily, Kai didn't seem so unknowing because he was heading her way with Bonnie's keys in hand. He unlocked the car and it ultimately stopped beeping. Bonnie breathed in as she enjoyed the sudden silence.

"I hate this day.", she mumbled.

"Did you take a look if everything's okay?", Kai asked as he took a look around.

"Yeah, everything's fine. Just another inanimate object that wants to ruin my day.", Bonnie turned around again to head back inside, but Kai held her back by her arm.

"Don't be overdramatic."

"What? I get to be overdramatic. This day sucks. I am supposed to have the party of a lifetime but instead planes, cars and dumb friends are keeping me from enjoying myself. How else am I supposed to be other than overdramatic, heh?"

Kai sighed, silently agreeing with her, let go of her arm and locked her car once more. Then he took her hand and led her back to the front door.

"It sucks that you don't get to have the day you deserve but I have to say, I never really understood why you only wanted to have a small gathering. You should have had a whole lot more than that." Kai said while they had nearly reached the front door. "I know you're blaming everyone else for not turning up for your party but that seems a little unfair."

"Unfair? How is that unfair?", Bonnie yelled.

"Because-", Kai pushed the front door opened and let her walk inside first. "it is all my fault. They only did it because I told them to."

"You- what?", Bonnie turned to face him but he was making her turn around with a smug grin.

All of a sudden, all the lights in the living room were turned on and Bonnie was greeted by two dozen of people all screaming "SURPRISE" in unison.

Bonnie's mouth dropped open when she saw Elena, Caroline, Jo and Faye on the right side of the room. They were running towards her, hugging her close and wishing her a happy birthday. Somewhere someone started to play music as everyone was lining up to greet the birthday girl.

"How are you here?", Bonnie asked Caroline and Elena. "I thought you were still in Richmond."

"We were already in Portland when we called you. Kai picked us up. We felt so bad lying to you but seeing your face right now made it worth it.", Elena giggle before hugging Bonnie again. There wasn't even time for Bonnie to be mad at them for fooling with her, she was just so happy to see them here.

After that the whole crew including the traitors Connor, Liza and Perry wished her a happy birthday. Faye was overly happy that everything planned out the way it did and Bonnie gave her a mock glare for her obvious conspiring with Kai- who she had completely lost in the crowd due to all the people lining up to congratulate her. She would have to find him later and thank him- or slap him for making her feel bad in the first place.

There were way more people at her house then she had originally planned and Bonnie started to worry about all the drinks and snacks she had organized. In that moment the doorbell rang and the pizza delivery guy entered with a tone of family sized pizza. Bonnie spotted Kai at the entrance winking at her and she knew that he had been calling the delivery guy with not only their little pizza order but this huge one for everyone. That sneaky little bastard.

Bonnie was having the fun of her life. This party was more she could have hoped for. The reason she had relinquished having a big party like this was the amount of preparations it acquired, and she really didn't have any time for that. Apparently, her boyfriend had and went over her head to plan something bigger than she did- which she was more than grateful for. It felt like the entire school was gathered in her living room.

The people started mingling and smaller groups build which finally gave Bonnie a little air to go and search for her boyfriend who she found in the kitchen talking to no other than Brian Glen. To her surprise Brian's face light up like a candle as he spotted her coming in.

"There's the birthday girl.", he yelled and wrapped his arms around her, lifting her in the air. Bonnie let out a mixture of a scream and a laugh before Brian finally let her down again. "Sorry for that, Bonnie. But I had to do it. You know this one was starting to get on my nerves with all the secrecy and planning he did. Just had to let you know how happy I am that it is finally your birthday. Congrats, girl."

"Thanks Brian.", Bonnie actually snickered, feeling like the entire encounter with Brian wasn't as painful or annoying as she would have thought. He might be a brainless idiot but he was nice. Over the last few weeks the two had gotten to know each other better since he had started to hang out with them a lot more in school. Bonnie blamed that on the rekindled flame between him and Faye that neither of them wanted to officially confirm.

Bonnie stepped next to Kai who placed his drink on the table, probably to safe it from her since he wasn't sure what to expect from Bonnie. Maybe he thought she would slap him for fooling around like that. She had thought about it but in this moment, she was just happy so she basically jumped into his arms and placed a hard kiss on his lips. Kai was surprised by her reaction and needed a second to catch her but then he held her close and let her down gently when their kiss was over.

"Did I really deserve that?", he asked, chuckling.

"Probably not and maybe you're going to pay for what you did another day but right now I am happy. So happy. Thank you."

Kai smiled at her and placed a small peck on her lips. "Everything to see you happy, Bon. Happy Birthday."

For a second Bonnie reveled in the feeling his words were giving her but then she remembered she was on a party- her party. She took a small step back and started to notice all the other people in the kitchen again. "So, what are we drinking?", she asked loud enough for Kai and Brian to hear.

"Dude, you should have never introduced this one to liquor.", Brian laughed but turned to grab a plastic cup from the table.

"I know, right?", Kai joked and Bonnie elbowed him in the side.

It didn't take too long for Bonnie to feel tipsy. She had gotten a very good Tequila Sunrise from Brian and had done shots with Elena, Caroline and Faye. Actually, she had done shots with a lot of people, so it was no wonder she was starting to notice the impact of the alcohol. Though she didn't feel completely out of it yet. She was feeling great, having such a good time.

The later the evening, the better the music got. She jumped around on the impromptu dance floor in the middle of her living room with her friends and spoke to nearly every person in the building. She wasn't worried that someone might break something or sneak up into her mother's bedroom because Kai had assured her that her mother knew exactly what was going to happen tonight and had taken all the preparations needed. Before Kai had come out to help her with her car earlier, he had gone upstairs and locked all the rooms that were for no one to be seen, like her room, the guest room and her mother's room. Bonnie had to give him credit where credit was due. He really had thought about everything.

Shortly after midnight, she came looking for her boyfriend once more. She found him outside with Perry, laughing uncontrollably at something he had just told Kai. It was pure joy to see him like this, so she stopped in her tracks, leaned against the patio door and watched him for a moment. He seemed just as tipsy as herself but she guessed he had way more to drink then her. Or maybe not, tonight she really couldn't tell.

"Hey creep, you wanna play stalker over there or come join us?", Perry yelled over the loud music and Bonnie realized that she had lost track of her thoughts once more. She stepped over to the two boys and placed herself half on Kai's lap half on the bench they were sitting on.

"Interrupting something?", Bonnie asked.

"Not at all.", Perry said in his usual tone. "I was just telling this story of freshman-year about how I accidentally outed myself to my Dad."

Bonnie laughed, remembering exactly how it went down. His father had been the most amazing person about his son's coming-out but it had still been a blast to hear about his failed attempt to call Liza and accidentally pouring his soul out to his dad.

"Oh god, I nearly forgot about that.", Bonnie snickered and placed one arm around Kai's neck for better stability. "How come you haven't told him this earlier? It's like one of your first things to tell people."

"What? You've been keeping this masterpiece from me?", Kai asked with overexaggerated shock in his voice.

"Not on purpose, my dear. You have to believe me. It just feels like you've been part of our little gang forever that I always believed you already knew.", Perry winked at him and Kai seemed to let him go on this one.

Bonnie smiled seeing the two getting along so well. She scratched Kai's chin and thereby catching his full attention. He smiled down at her and closed the distance between them the next second. The kiss was civil, given their surroundings, but made Bonnie gasp for more. Too soon, Kai let go of her lips and kissed the tip of her nose.

"You guys are just plane adorable, you know that?", Perry said. "It is such a shame."

Kai and Bonnie both laughed at the comment. Perry had told them once, on another party, that if Kai wasn't with Bonnie he would totally try and hit on him- hetero or not. Bonnie had always known that Kai was totally Perry's type since they had been pining over him together for a while back in middle school. It was just a funny joke now and Kai had taken it as a compliment.

Kai turned his face back to Perry and said. "You know man, if I ever decide to play for the other team, it will only be for you."

Perry put his hand to his heart and inhaled loudly. "Kai Parker, stop playing with my heart, you naughty boy. You know I'll never ever forget that statement, right?"

Kai and Bonnie both laughed.

"But looking at that beautiful young lady in your lap, I guess I have to be realistic. There won't be much of an opportunity for me.", Perry sighed.

"Hey, never say never. Maybe you'll have to wait until I'm like 50 and in the middle of a midlife crisis, but if you'll still have me-", Kai kept on joking.

"I'll take you at any age, Mr. Parker. Be sure of that. Sorry, Bon. I'm gonna steal your man. It's gonna be a long howl but one day, he'll be mine."

"Well, I guess I was warned.", Bonnie chuckled and placed one kiss on Kai's cheek.

"Alright, lovebird. This is getting to hetero for me. I'll go inside and dance off to Beyoncé like I was born to do. See ya later." With that Perry got off the bench and waved them goodbye.

"So, you would really leave me for Perry, did I understand that correctly?", Bonnie asked and tugged on Kai's neckline playfully.

"Would you rather it be someone else?", Kai replied and pulled her further onto his lap. "Besides, I gave you like another 32 years with me before I change my ways, isn't that enough?"

"Eternity is not enough with you.", Bonnie said and cupped his face.

"Cheesy.", Kai stated as he slowly lowered his head towards her lips.

"I get to be cheesy today. It's my birthday.", she whispered since his lips were already so close.

"I know. That's why you're getting a pass.", he purred against her lips before he finally sealed them with his. This time their kiss was more passionate, more breathtaking. Bonnie was feeling like she was floating and the kiss turned into a fully-grown make-out session. Most of the people were inside, the others outside were too drunk to notice and even if they did, it wasn't a sight that was unexpected at a party.

After a while they pulled apart, both of them gasping for air. Kai hummed contently against her lingering lips and Bonnie broke into a wide grin. It was unbelievable what the happiness of this boy meant to her, what it made her feel.

Even though the party was still going on around them, they had spent the last ten minutes in their own bubble. That was why they both startled when a familiar female voice called out for Bonnie.

"Get your ass in here, Bennett. We're drinking.", Caroline's voice reached her ear and she had to chuckle. Kai pressed her closer to him, pressing a kiss on her cheek, making it even harder for her to untangle herself from him. But it seemed like Kai had intended this hug as a goodbye since he leaned down to her ear and said. "You should get over there. It's not fair of you to ignore everyone else on this party. As flattered as I am, you only see your best friends every now and then, I'm always here. So, go over there and have fun with them."

Bonnie turned around in his hold in order to look directly in his eyes. They were so full of affection at this moment that it made her heart jump. "Is that a promise?"

Kai looked confused for a moment until he figured out what her question was going at. She wanted him to promise her that he would always be there. Cheesy, again, and an impossible thing to promise, even for a person that wasn't as guarded as Kai Parker. Bonnie didn't expect a positive answer from him, or an answer at all. It had been more like a mock-question anyway. But Kai's eyes softened once more and his embrace didn't loosen a bit so she could get up. And then he kissed her softly and whispered "Maybe." before releasing her.

Bonnie was kind of dazed when she stood up and walked over back into the house. Kai's word echoing in her head when she was trying to figure out if he had been serious or messing with her. When she reached Caroline and Elena, she needed to snap back into reality because she was handed a shot glass and needed to down it the next second.

A few glasses later, Elena grabbed Caroline and Bonnie's hands and dragged them over to the couch.

"Okay, we didn't get a chance to talk tonight. So, what's going on in your life right now?", Elena asked while sipping her drink.

"Well, not much. Collage, school, Kai- the usual. I think you're already are in the picture.", Bonnie said.

"Speaking of- I watched the two of you outside.", Caroline wiggled her eyebrows. "Looked kind of intense and pretty- serious."

"Care.", Bonnie slapped her friends arm. "You already know that it is."

"Serious?", Elena asked with wide eyes. "How serious?"

"As serious as that I know that I love him."; Bonnie whispered keeping her gaze to the ground.

"Oh my god, Bonnie.", Caroline jumped up and down on the couch. "That's amazing. Does he feel the same?"

"Who knows, with guys these days?", Bonnie admitted. Caroline and Elena shared a quick look.

"You haven't told him, yet?", Caroline wanted to know.

"I guess you'd know if I did, don't you think?"

"I would hope so.", Caroline exclaimed and Elena slapped her other arm.

"What are you waiting for?", Elena asked.

"I-I don't know really. It's just something that will make everything- more complicated. I like what we're having right now, it feels really good and if I tell him now, it might change."

"Because you fear he doesn't feel the same?", Elena interrogated further.

"No. Yes. I don't know. Kai is a complicated person when it comes to emotions. That he made it this far is kind of a miracle because he is not exactly known for letting himself feel anything. I fear that he is not ready to hear it and most definitely not ready to say it back."

"But do you need him to say it back right away?", Caroline asked with a serious look in her eyes.

"What do you mean? Of course you want to hear it back when you express your love for someone.", Elena interrupted.

"Well, maybe not. Love is not about hearing the other person say what they feel, it's about feeling that they do. And from what I heard the past few weeks and saw today, I have a feeling that Bonnie might be content with what she is getting in return. Or am I wrong?"

Elena and Caroline both watched her and Bonnie hadn't realized that Caroline was right until now. "Care is right. It's enough. I know that he cares about me, very much. And given the fact that I know how he is struggling with voicing his feelings and opening up, I think I don't need him to say it back. But maybe you're right, maybe he needs to hear it."

Caroline smiled at her and reached out for her hand, squeezing it reassuringly. Elena seemed to be thinking about something. "Yeah, maybe you two are right.", she said absentmindedly.

"You talking about Stefan?", Bonnie asked curiously.

"Well, maybe. It's been some time now that we've been together and I have told him how I feel once when we were having kind of a fight. We got through the fight but he never said it back, but now that I hear you talk about it- maybe that's okay. I mean, I love him and I know he loves me. I was always so insecure about it since he never said it back but- hearing you say that what Kai does for you makes you know what he feels- maybe I shouldn't be so insecure after all."

"Of course you shouldn't!", Caroline yelled. "Stefan is totally and utterly in love with you, everyone can see that."

Elena and Bonnie needed to giggle about Caroline's enthusiasm. "I guess we have to believe the only one that has a completely functional relationship out of the three of us.", Elena joked and Caroline nodded.

"Yes, that would be wise.", she joked and the three clinked their glasses resuming to talk about a lighter topic.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The party resumed the way that it started. With a lot of alcohol and a lot of fun. Bonnie had stopped drinking a while ago because she didn't want to forget about everything that happened due to intoxication.

Around three a.m. the first people said their goodbye's. Faye was driving Perry and Liza home since they had arrived together as well. Elena dragged a very drunk Caroline upstairs to the guest room around 4 and stayed with her.

Jo had hugged her enthusiastically when she left with Jessica half and hour later. She tried to drag as many people as she could with her so an obviously tired Bonnie could finally get some rest. Around 5 every last one of her guest had vanished and Bonnie started to clean up the mess they left behind.

When she was putting all the plastic cups that were spread across the living room table into each other she felt strong arms envelope her waist and a head leaned onto her shoulder from behind. Bonnie straightened to make Kai's position more comfortable.

"Let's go to bed.", he sleepily mumbled against her neck.

Bonnie chuckled. "You can go to bed. I'll clean up a bit. Mom's gonna freak when she comes home and it looks like this."

"You mom's not coming home until evening, I made sure of that.", he kept on babbling.

Bonnie turned around in his hold, so she was facing him. His arms remained around her waist but only loosely. When she looked into his face she saw the tiredness of his voice mirrored in his face.

"You thought of everything, didn't you?", Bonnie joked and kissed him.

"Sure, that's what I am known for." He winked and then pulled her closer to him. "Can we go to bed now? I'll help you clean up after a few hours of sleep, 'kay?"

"Alright.", Bonnie gave in and as soon as she had spoken the word, Kai had taken her hand and lead her to the stair. As quiet as possible the two made their way to Bonnie's room and closed the door behind them. Kai went directly to the bed and plopped down on it, putting his arm over his eyes. Bonnie smiled at the sight. Somehow, he looked like a small kid while doing it and she always liked it when he was adorable like that.

With slow but deliberate steps she went over to him and straddled him. Kai instantly removed his arm from his eyes and put his hands on her legs.

"Did I already thank you for tonight?", she asked him alluringly.

"You don't need to thank me. If anything, I need to apologize for making you feel so bad earlier.", he replied.

"No, that's okay. I had a wonderful night so a THANK YOU is in order." Before he could object she leaned down and placed her lips onto his. If he would have been more serious about his apology he could have easily pushed her off him but he obviously wasn't. Rather than pushing her away, he deepened the kiss and fell in tune with Bonnie's movements right away. Bonnie's hair fell over and covered both their faces as she felt Kai's hands wandered up on her legs and underneath her skirt, rubbing her skin.

It seemed like she had given him an energy boost because he flipped their positions in one swift move. Bonnie was now lying on the matrass, Kai hovering over her, kissing her. She wrapped her legs around his waist and put her hands around his neck, pressing him to her. Even though the heat of the kiss was undeniable, Kai was still soft in his movements and touches. He let his hands glide up and down the side of her body, not once trying to undo her clothes.

The familiar heartbeat and stomach pinch returned to Bonnie just as it had earlier that night. She could barely contain the butterflies in her stomach as Kai started to make a trail of kisses down her neck. Her heart felt light and heavy at the same time, jumping rapidly in her chest. Endorphins were making Bonnie feel as happy as she ever was and Kai mindlessly continued his caresses her neck. When he reached that spot right underneath Bonnie's right ear, she closed her eyes.

Her hands found his hair and started to caress it the way he like it most. She heard a content moan from him right beneath her ear and smiled. Kai covered her lips once more for a brief time before he went over to the other side of her neck. Without thinking twice, she let all the bottled up emotions she had stored away for the past few weeks out.

"I love you.", Bonnie breathed breathlessly into the darkness.

She meant what she said and she wanted to tell him in that particular moment, even though she knew that it would provoke some kind of reaction form Kai.

First, he froze in place, stopping with his kisses but he didn't move at all. Somehow that made Bonnie nervous. She nearly cried out when he abruptly sat up and looked down at her with shock and horror in his eyes.

"No, you don't."

Author's note: Sorry, sorry, sorry for the loooong wait. Be mad at me for it, I deserve it. Thanks to the holidays I have found time to finally finish this chapter. It's been a work in progress since September but I was working on some other stuff and let this slide. I am sorry. So enjoy this chapter and be sure that I will update again. This fic means a lot to me and I want to end it the way that I intend to end it and not by abandoning it. Life is just time consuming so be patient.