Mundane

by LiLaAir

Bonnie is living in Portland with her mother. She still has a strong connection to her Mystic Falls life and has created a good way to combine the two worlds. Until she meets Kai Parker, a boy from her school that has quiet a raputation. Bonnie is struggling to keep her life the way she used to handle it. Why does he have such an impact on her? All human and other characters.

52. Chapter Fifty-Two: The Holiday Spirit

Chapter Fifty-Two: The Holiday Spirit

No snow. There was not a single cloud in the sky that would indicate that there would be any snow this year on Christmas eve. Bonnie sat in her room, trying to wrap the last presence she had gotten last minute. Her mother was out trying to get the last things she needed for tonight's dinner.

Bonnie's grams was downstairs preparing her famous tiramisu. That gave Bonnie the time she needed to get everything ready. She had gotten her grams records of Frank Sinatra and her mother and Jeffrey would get tickets for a musical. She had wrapped those presents days ago. She was now busy wrapping her father's present which Sheila would take back to Mystic Falls. Bonnie had had her problems finding the right present for her father that was why she didn't mail it to him, like she usually did.

But the biggest problem had been the present for Kai. He had fought her on getting him something for Christmas but he finally caved when she pouted for an hour straight. She didn't know why she wanted to give him something so badly, because she had accepted his terms at his birthday before and didn't mind then.

She had regretted her decision instantly as she was looking around the shops, trying to find something for him. She finally settled on a remotely-controlled car. He had told her how much he had liked that growing up and that he never had one since his dad thought they were too loud. He had gotten one from his granny once, but Joshua had managed to break the thing as soon as Kai wanted to try it out. Now, there was no one there to forbid him to have this car. It had been a last minute order and she was lucky that it had arrived this morning.

Bonnie wouldn't be able to see much of Kai over the holidays since he was wrapped up in family festive just as much as she was. They agreed to see each other on the second day of Christmas but she hoped that she would find time to pay him a visit earlier.

Ever since their big fight and reconciliation, they had been acting differently around each other.

Monday after her birthday, Kai had been absent from school. Everyone had asked her where he was and Bonnie had to make up some reason because Kai hadn't given her one. In the afternoon he had texted her that he overslept and then didn't find the right motivation to get up. It had been okay, since Bonnie didn't feel like he was avoiding her.

The day after that, Kai had shown up for third period. Bonnie was at her locker when she heard a soft knock against the open door. She peaked around and found Kai leaning against the lockers. Bonnie saw the kid that had just been there running away from the scene and glancing over his shoulder to them. Did Kai just scare him away? It had been some time since he intimidated younger pupils. But Kai still had this reputation and maybe he didn't seem too nice at that moment when he was heading her way.

Nevertheless, she smiled as she saw him and he smiled back at her. It was a little bit more hesitant then usual, but it was honest. They exchanged the usual smalltalk before heading to their classes. They didn't touch at all, which Bonnie didn't like but she didn't know if he did that on purpose or if it was accidental.

That day in the cafeteria, he only popped up for a short while. Bonnie was just heading towards the table Faye and the others were sitting in, when she felt a light tug on her arm. The spot instantly tickled and she knew exactly who was reaching for her. She stopped and turned around to greet Kai. He only hesitantly smiled at her and told her he was called into the principal's office for a 'chat'. He used airquotes for the last word and Bonnie instantly knew what his mood was like.

When she asked what happened, Kai seemed a little hesitant to tell her. When he finally did tell her, it was completely the opposite of what she expected. Kai wasn't called in because something happened with another student or teacher, he was called in because a representative of MIT was there to talk to him. And his father. Not a good combination. Bonnie knew what Kai's thoughts were about the entire future-plan his father had laid out for him since his birth and she found it very odd that someone from MIT would come down here to talk to Kai. But then she remembered his father talking about having connections to all the important schools in the country. It seemed like he had organized that meeting and that he obviously had a preference when it came to school options for his son.

Bonnie reached out to touch Kai's hand in comfort. To her surprise he shied away from her touch instantly. Bonnie's heart started to ache and Kai seemed to notice so he entwined their fingers. Bonnie smiled a sad smile but squeezed his hands reassuringly.

Kai left soon after and Bonnie went over to their friends table. She was lost in her thoughts and didn't seem to notice too much about the talk that went on between them. When the break was nearly over, Bonnie went to get rid of her nearly untouched food, ready to head back into class.

When she was back in the hallway, Faye reached up to her and grabbed her shoulder. She asked about Bonnie's well-being since she didn't seem to have eaten anything and seemed to be absent-minded. Bonnie reassured her she was fine, at least that was not a lie. She was physically fine. And then Faye went on and asked weather her and Kai were doing okay, since she noticed some tension between them earlier.

That had taken Bonnie by surprise and she struggled to come up with a sufficient lie. Of course, Faye looked right through her and pulled her to the side. Her piercing gaze made Bonnie feel uncomfortable. She knew her friend only worried about her but still, she felt like this was some kind of interrogation. Bonnie sighed. She didn't know what to tell Faye. She hadn't even been completely honest with Caroline and Elena on Sunday. She had only told them Kai and her had a discussion and that they would get over it. Now, she tried the same half-truth with Faye, but it was harder with her since she had made a picture for herself by watching the two interact.

Faye didn't say anything, she just observed Bonnie for a while and asked her if she was sure. When Bonnie affirmed, she let it go- for now.

The following days were spent pretty much the same. There was still awkwardness in the air and a hint of distance. Neither of the two knew exactly what their deal- about taking things slow- actually meant. The tension between them didn't go by unnoticed. Bonnie caught people talking about the two in the girls room or they just turned silent when Bonnie arrived, looking at her with pity. It was ridiculous, really.

Still, their behavior didn't silence any of the gossip. They spent their time together in school but since they had been unbreakable before her birthday, everyone noticed the lack of touching and warmth. It took them more than a week to kiss again. It happened when they ran into each other after school had ended. Kai had asked to take her home, but Bonnie had taken her own car that morning and so she declined his offer. When they walked out of the building, she nearly ran him over. As he had spotted her and she was busy texting Elena and ignoring her surroundings, they shared the first real laugh. Kai walked her to her car and they stood there for a while longer, for the first time talking more freely. When Bonnie explained she had to go home, Kai leaned down to her and placed a soft kiss onto her lips.

After such a long time without touching him, this kiss wasn't nearly enough for Bonnie's liking. She felt the touch of his lips on hers for the rest of the day and she hated herself for being busy that day, because all she wanted to do was be with him.

The other day, Bonnie went over to his place. Her official excuse was that she wanted to see how Jo was doing since she had stayed at home due to the flue. After caring for her friend for about half an hour, she left her to rest and went right to Kai's room. It seemed that he had expected her because he had just brought two cups of hot tea up to his room. Bonnie gladly took him up on his offer and placed herself next to him on the bed. They talked for a long time and Bonnie didn't even realize how late it had gotten when she took another look at her watch.

They had a great time that day and she didn't want to overdo it by staying the night. Even though she desperately missed him by her side. But she shouldn't have to wait too much longer. A few days after that, Kai surprised her at home. At first, they fooled around a little bit, laughing like nothing ever happened. But then Bonnie suggested watching a movie and they both got into bed. Bonnie leaned in a bit, resting her head on his shoulder after a while. It was a comfortable silence between them and when she turned her head to look at Kai halfway into the movie, she realized that he had fallen asleep. Very careful not to wake him, Bonnie resumed watching the movie. When it was over, she felt Kai stir awake.

"Morning, sleepyhead.", Bonnie teased.

"I just rested my eyes for a moment.", Kai mumbled in a sleepy voice.

Bonnie had to laugh at his comment. "The movie is over, Kai. You slept through the whole thing."

Kai looked a little confused and it took him a while until he realized she was telling the truth. He groaned and let his head fall back into the pillow, his arms placed over his eyes. Bonnie picked at them so she could see his entire face.

"Maybe you should just go to sleep. It seems like you can use it.", Bonnie suggested, knowing exactly what she had just offered him without particularly saying it out loud.

Kai realized it as well, because he opened his eyes and looked at her. Even though he was tired as hell his eyes were clear as he considered staying the night. Bonnie patiently waited for his response.

"Okay.", was his single word answer but it was all she needed. Her face wanted to give away her happiness with a bright and dumb grin, but she managed to keep her facial expression under control. She just nodded at him and smiled sweetly.

Kai watched her for a second longer before he got rid of his jeans and socks. All without leaving the bed itself. He then turned to his side, facing Bonnie, and closing his eyes to fall asleep. Bonnie had no doubt that he would slip off into the dream land within moments, so she leaned down and pecked his lips softly, then she withdrew again keeping her gaze stuck on him.

Kai opened his eyes once more, gazing at her face. He hummed contently when he closed his eyes again and instantly fell asleep. Bonnie snuggled closer to him, not as close as she usually was but as close, so she could feel his warmth next to her. With his sleeping presence next to her, Bonnie was soothed into her own sleep quickly. That night, she had slept as good as she hadn't in a long while.

Shaking her head, Bonnie regained control of her actions. The little trip down memory lane had immobilized her and she resumed wrapping Kai's present. She had spent an awful lot of time thinking about that night the past few days. It seemed like she had finally gotten rid of the awkwardness between them because ever since Kai had spend the night at her place, they had acted more natural. The next morning, Kai even fooled around with her mother, something that wasn't unnormal for the two but in the recent weeks, Kai had avoided most of Bonnie's family. Abby had asked her about it a while back, but Bonnie didn't want her to worry and told her that Kai was dealing with a lot of family drama during the holiday preparation and it wasn't even a lie.

Whenever they were feeling comfortable with each other enough, Kai would rant about how he hated Christmas and everything that came along with it since it was the only time of year where his father bothered to play parent to his many children, trying to compromise his absence and incapability with strictness and demands. As if the holidays weren't stressful enough as it is.

That was why she was looking forward to spending the second day of Christmas with him. Kai and Jo would come over to the Bennett's for dinner and Bonnie hoped that she would be able to give them a better Christmas experience. Her family might not be perfect, but the sure as hell were way cooler about tradition and only wanted to spend a nice time together, without complications.

"Bonnie, get down here. Dinner is ready.", Abby's voice rang from downstairs.

"Coming mom.", she let her mother know and finished arranging the bow she had wrapped around Kai's present. With a content last look, she placed the present next to the others and went downstairs.

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"Are you ready for your trip to Whistler yet?", Sheila asked during dinner.

"Not quite yet. I need to get some things done for the holidays first. But the basics are done. I have my passport, my winter jacket.", Bonnie explained to her grandmother.

Kai and his family always spend the week after Christmas in Whistler, Canada for skiing. Even Dawn was participating in the event even though, according to Kai, she hated spending this much time in close proximity with Joshua. Last year, due to a nasty blizzard Dawn needed to get back to England early though. Kai had taken the opportunity to escape his family and had taken her back to the states. Unfortunate, due to booking a last minute flight, Dawn had to fly from Richmond, Virginia. This was why, Kai ended up on the same flight as her, back to Portland.

Ever since she had found out about that a few months back, she had been complaining about not being able to spend time with her boyfriend during this time. She kind of wanted to celebrate it as their second anniversary, since technically on said flight from Richmond to Portland, their story had only begun.

Kai had realized that it was important to Bonnie to be together during this time and had asked her to come along on the trip. Jo and Briana had been totally psyched about it, but Bonnie hesitated to ask her mother if she could come along, since she had never tried skiing before. The Parkers were all experienced skiers, she would only embarrass herself. But Kai really wanted her to come along. This way he would have another buffer between himself and his father apart from his granny and Jo. Secretly, Bonnie had been excited about the trip ever since he asked her. That was why she agreed to it. This was all before their huge fight and now Bonnie was more than anxious about it. Spending time with him 24/7 and not having much of a way to escape each other could either be very healing for their relationship or could kill it once and for all.

"You should be packing a lot of warm clothes, child. This time of year, you'll need every piece of clothing you can get up there.", Sheila went on. Bonnie chuckled. This was a typical thing to say for her grandmother. Due to their southern origin, the Bennetts would consider 68 degrees cold.

"Don't worry about it grams, I won't freeze to death up there. Dawn will make sure of that."

Somehow this argument soothed Sheila's worried mind a lot. The old ladies had kept in touch after meeting some time back. Bonnie's guess was that grams was only okay with letting Bonnie go to another county without any of her own family present because she knew that Dawn would be there to keep a watchful eye out for her only granddaughter.

"Already excited for your first time out of the country?", Abby wanted to know and Bonnie needed to put on her pokerface, which happened more often over the past few months.

"Yeah, totally. Even though, my first trip could have been something more exiting like somewhere in Europe. But Canada has to do for now, I guess."

"Ah, the young and restless. Keep that spirit of yours up, child. You should explore everything there is out there while you still can and nobody is holding you back.", Sheila mentioned.

"What's that supposed to mean, mom? Are you saying that having me held you back on fulfilling your dreams?", Abby teased her mother like she always loved. Grams was totally taking the bait and mother and daughter started a more or less serious discussion about how having a family is such an honorable thing to achieve in life but that in modern ages, there was no need to rush things. In the end, they would both laugh and tell Bonnie to live her life just the way she wanted.

Because she had witnessed this discussion for a thousand times already, Bonnie took the opportunity to zone out and think about the days ahead of her. She was excited, yes. But she was also worried.

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The night of the 25th December, Bonnie had managed to talk her mother into letting her leave the house. She was usually not allowing her to spend the evening with anyone else but family but Bonnie had begged her long enough, so she caved. She would only be at Kai's place, which was basically family. And it was already late, there wasn't much she would be missing out on.

So now, Bonnie was standing in front of the Parker house with presents for all the small Parker kids in her bag. Most of them would already be asleep, but they would be able to open them in the morning. At least Jo and Kai would be able to see what she got them.

Bonnie had texted Kai to see if it was okay if she came around and spend the night. She knew Joshua wouldn't be too happy about it, but Kai texted her that he wouldn't even notice and even if, he could screw himself. So, Bonnie got into her car and drove over to the Parker's.

When she arrived, Bonnie snuck to the back entrance so that Joshua wouldn't notice. She had texted Kai that she had arrived and when he didn't instantly open the door, she knocked hesitantly against the kitchen door. The December breeze was slowly making her shiver and she was about to call Kai so that he would let her in when the lights in the kitchen were turned on. Within a matter of seconds Kai peaked through the glass and smiled at her before he opened the door.

Bonnie rushed inside without properly saying hello because she was freezing her ass off.

"Dude, what took you so -?", she turned around to give Kai a semi-serious glare. That was when she noticed his outfit. He was wearing his black sweatpants but instead of his equally dark shirt he was wearing a red Christmas sweater with white ornaments on it. Kai had his hands buried in his pants pockets and leaned onto the now closed door. The look on his face was curious and playful. He looked adorable.

"Is there a finish to your question?", he asked with a smirk.

"No.", Bonnie said dumbfounded. She blinked a few times. "I mean. There was but, it doesn't matter. What are you wearing?" Bonnie took a few steps towards him and reached out to touch the thick material of his sweater.

"Don't you like it?", Kai asked cockily as she leaned forward, nearly touching her nose with his.

"On the contrary.", Bonnie giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck, smiling up into his beautiful face.

Kai smiled back at her and the butterflies in her stomach went into overdrive. "Merry Christmas to you, too.", Kai said softly before he put his lips onto hers. Bonnie gladly pulled him closer to her, reveling in the fact that he initiated this intimate exchange of theirs. She felt him push away from the door and wrapping his arms around her waist.

With slow but deliberate steps they made their way through the room until Bonnie felt something crash into her lower back. She realized that it must be one of the kitchen counters, but she didnt mind looking because that would mean that she would need to break away from Kai and she wasn't ready for that just yet.

Kai's arms were wrapped around her in a tight embrace, but they slowly wandered up and down her back, leaving goosebumps along the way- even through the fabric of her hoodie. Their kiss got more intense by the second and Bonnie felt like this could lead to more after weeks of absence. But of course, she didn't think of the merry band of Parkers that lived in this house, too.

The fast steps that would have announced her arrival were too light to be heard over the rush in Bonnie's ears. But the high-pitched voice of a small girl ripped both of them apart quickly.

"Santa? Is that you?" Briana's voice was so hopeful that it almost hurts when she peaked around the corner and saw Bonnie and Kai. Her face fell immediately.

"Obviously not.", Kai groaned as he angrily took a few steps back from Bonnie, who was still a little dazed from their heavy make-out. But she pushed herself to be nice to the little girl in front of her.

"Hey Bri, I guess I'm not Santa but I am still happy to see you.", Bonnie laughed but it didn't do anything to brighten Briana's mood. Usually, she was always happy to see her, but Bonnie understood, that she was mad right now. No matter how hard she would try, she'd never reach Santa.

"I wanted to see Santa.", Briana said sadly, and Bonnie felt for the little girl.

"Come on, it's already past Santa time. He won't show up after he brought the presents. Why the hell would he drop by now, huh? Use your brain, Briana. I know it's not as big yet but I think you can do-"

Bonnie violently made Kai shut up by punching his arm. He made an angry sound but when he was about to ask Bonnie what the hell she was doing, he shut up when he saw her face.

She only shook her head and leaned down to a horrified looking Briana. "What Kai is trying to say is, that Santa is so busy over the holidays that he can't come and see everyone. Even now that he has delivered all his presents, he has so much cleaning up to do. But don't be sad. Santa gave me a gift for you to let you know, that he thinks of you."

Bonnie turned around and reached for her stuff. The bag with all the gifts lay near the door and Bonnie searched for the stuffed unicorn she had gotten Briana.

"Don't give it to her now. She won't be able to sleep and tomorrow she'll be super pissed when she gets nothing.", Kai complained, still holding his arm. He wasn't completely wrong, maybe this wasn't the right move to give Briana her present now, but Bonnie wanted to keep the girls faith up and she thought that Briana could handle it.

"I will be a good girl.", Briana kept saying as she waited patiently for Bonnie to give her the present. Kai didn't seem convinced at all and went to Bonnie to tell she can be the one to get her to sleep then. Then he turned around and left the kitchen. Bonnie couldn't believe what kind of Grinch Kai could be. She handed the present to a waiting Briana and was gifted with the most heartwarming scream of joy of all time. Briana was so happy about the unicorn she didn't want to let it go for one second. For a moment, Bonnie feared that Kai might have been right and that she will never get back to bed now. But Bonnie calmed her down again and told her that she should show the unicorn where it can sleep because it was still a little tired from the long journey from the north pole. To her surprise, Briana agreed with her and grabbed Bonnie's hand to guide her to her room. She jumped into her bed and placed the unicorn right next to her before she asked Bonnie to tug her in and give her and the unicorn a goodnight kiss.

About ten minutes later she walked into Kai's room and earned an approving nod from him. "That was fast. Maybe you should be the one to get the little monster to bed every day if you are such an expert for that." He didn't sound annoyed or jealous, it was more or less a real suggestion. Bonnie knew that after their mother had passed and their granny had gone back to England, a lot of responsibilities were now on the shoulders of the oldest Parker kids. She could imagine Kai and Jo arguing with Briana about going to bed.

"I'm pretty sure it would soon lose it's effect.", Bonnie said apologetically and dropped down next to him on the bed. "What are you doing, Grinch?"

Kai was on his laptop, browsing on some webpage. He looked up from the screen as if he felt accused. "I'm not a Grinch."

"Oh, yeah?", Bonnie laughed. "Tell that to the little girl whose faith you nearly crushed with your rant about Santa. She nearly cried, what did you think? Can't you remember how magical it felt believing in Santa?"

Kai's attention was back to the screen. "I never believed in Santa.", he answered dryly, and Bonnie's eyes widened for a moment, then she laughed.

"Liar. Every kid believes in Santa.", Bonnie pointed to his Christmas sweater that gave her a small idea on how Kai must have been as a kid on Christmas.

"No, it's true. Or at least I don't remember believing in him. I stopped when my father told me right into my face, that Santa was fake and that mom was buying all our presents. I was three."

Bonnie blinked for a second, not believing what she just heard. "You're serious.", she stated more to herself then him. Kai didn't react to her statement and she knew that he was telling the truth. Of all the horrible things Joshua Parker had done to him over the time, ones that she knew of and ones that she could only imagine, this might be one of the most evil of his doings. Who was so cruel as to crush their kids imagination like that.

Bonnie suddenly felt sad for Kai for missing out on a lot of stuff. Bonnie remembered her father, back when her parents were still together, dressed up as Santa when she was about four or five. She felt something about Santa was familiar, but she just loved the thought that Santa was black and decided to visit her that Christmas. Until today, it was still one of her favorite memories of her childhood. In the next moment, Bonnie threw herself at Kai and placed her arms around his neck. The force of her sudden movement had surprised him and he had fallen over on his back. He was giggling now and Bonnie was trying to unwrap herself from his limbs.

"Why would he do something like that?", Bonnie mumbled and Kai stopped giggling. He also stopped her from untangling herself from him completely and kept her head pressed to his chest by burying his hands in her dark hair. Bonnie closed her eyes for a moment and smiled. She was greedy for any kind of physical connection with him and right now, he was the one keeping it up, so she wouldn't do anything to jeopardize that.

"Why does Joshua do anything?" Kai's voice sounded sad and tired. It seemed like he had given up on trying to get his father a long time ago.

Kai searched for his laptop with his free hand and closed it, leaving the room in utter darkness. His other hand was still in Bonnie's hair, massaging her skull lightly. It was pretty late and she felt drained from the day. Family can be exhausting at times. But she had wanted to give Kai her present and so she forced herself to raise from his chest.

"Aren't you curious about what Santa go you?", she asked in his general direction because she could barely see him. She only now realized that that question sounded way more seductive than she had intended.

"I don't think I will get anything this year. I was a naughty boy.", Kai answered her, falling right into what she had started. She smacked his chest, or what she thought was his chest and reached over to his night stand to switch on his lamp.

"I guess Santa was being generous this year.", she said and reached over to her bag getting out the package that was intended for Kai.

"Wait, I really don't want to have it right now." Kai had grabbed her arm lightly to hold her back. Bonnie turned around to watch him.

"Huh?"

"Don't get me wrong. I want to have it, but I am pretty tired right now and I want to see your face when you open your present."

Bonnie suddenly felt anxious about what Kai might have gotten her. She hadn't spent too much time thinking about it, since she was too busy getting presents of her own. But now, she feared he might have made his warning come true and got her those monsters vs. monster truck cards she had made fun off some while back. Bonnie swallowed. "Okay, then give me your present in the morning."

"Nope, if you give me yours, you'll get mine and then you'll have to open it and I won't be able to appreciate your reaction. Come on Bon, let's just do it in the morning. I'll make you breakfast in bed and after that we can exchange presents, sound fair?"

Bonnie's heart jumped once as she heard him talk about breakfast in bed. It was a sweet and heavily romantic gesture and Bonnie really wanted to have that. She needed that more than she might have been willing to admit. So, she finally sighed and nodded. She turned the light off again, reached for the blanket and placed her head back on his chest, right where he had been a few moments ago. To her surprise, Kai's fingers found her hair again and he started letting them roam through them. Bonnie was quickly soothed into a relaxed state and soon after, she was asleep in his arms.

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In the morning she was woken up by the heavenly smell of fresh coffee on her bedside. When she opened her eyes, she couldn't find a trace of Kai though, but she was sure that he was the one to put the hot beverage next to her. Bonnie sat up and saw the post-it on the cup. Be right there with you. Xo

Bonnie had to laugh about the cheesy xo, it was way too gossip girly for Kai. She sat up and reached for the hot coffee. It was delicious, just the way she liked it. Bonnie wondered how long it had been standing there but it couldn't have been too long because it was still steaming hot. At that moment, the door got opened more or less carefully. It was loud as hell but when Bonnie saw that Kai was carrying a tray full of food, she knew that this had been the most quite way for him to get into the room. His gaze was focused on the food, so he wouldn't spill anything. His hair was damp and he was wearing a black shirt labeled Hongkong 83, which meant that he had taken a shower recently. With a quick look at the clock, she wondered when he had gotten up to do all this because it was only 8:45.

When his gaze finally found hers, he smiled at her. "You're up."

"Yes, I am.", Bonnie answered while holding on to her cup.

"That's good. Now I don't have to wake you up and deal with your morning-grumpiness."

Bonnie opened her mouth, scandalized. "I'm not grumpy in the morning."

Kai huffs. "Yeah, you are." He placed the tray down on the bed next to her and kissed her. Then he climbed over her back into bed and didn't realize how woozy he had left her with his kiss.

"Damn, I'm starving.", Kai let out and Bonnie shook her head to get a grip on the situation.

"Can't imagine." Bonnie joked and bumped her shoulder into his. Kai ignored her and started filling up one of the empty plates he had brought with scrambled eggs before handing it to her.

They ate a really tasteful breakfast and fooled around like back in the day, when they were only friends. Bonnie was enjoying the light atmosphere between them because it was so much better than the last couple of weeks. She realized now, how much she had missed him. Not her boyfriend, but Kai- her best friend.

"Okay, time for your gift!", Bonnie pointed at him when he was about to start a terrible tickle-torture.

Kai sat back like a well-trained dog and left her alone. "As promised.", he only said and Bonnie grabbed the gift from her bag, handing it to him without a word.

Kai shook the gift before he started unwrapping it and Bonnie tensed up. What if he thought the car was too childish? But when he first caught a glimpse of the remote-control car, his face lit up like he was still 6 years old.

"No fucking way.", he said and started to free the car from its confinement. As soon as he held it in his hands, he grabbed the remote and leaned over the bed, placing it down and started to drive around with it through his room. It was heartwarming to see the expression on his face. Bonnie could only compare it to pure joy. Kai let the car spin around in his room for a few minutes before heavily bumping into his door. "Ups.", he said before he sat back and turned to her. He pressed his lips on hers for what felt like forever. When he pulled back he said "Best gift ever. I love it. Thank you, Bonster."

Bonnie smiled happily. "Your welcome."

Kai let the car drive back to the side of the bed and picked it up, turning it off in the process. "Need to find a place to hide this or Bellamy will come and take it from me." Kai got up and placed the car in one of his desk drawers before he reached into another and got out a medium sized package. He walked back over to her and handed it to her.

"For me?", Bonnie asked in an exaggerated voice before taking it. Kai didn't say anything but just sat down and watched her while she carefully unwrapped the present. She was kind of relieved because she didn't expect there to be tickets for Mosters vs. Moster-Trucks in it but she hadn't anticipated another small package underneath the wrapping paper.

Bonnie's expression fell when she realized what she was holding in her hands. It was a rectangular jewelry box and Bonnie instantly knew that whatever was inside, was way too much.

"Kai-", she started but he cut her off by grabbing her wrist.

"Just open it."

She stared deeply into his eyes, those beautiful blue eyes that looked like there was a storm raging inside. The ocean blue that could calm her down no matter what. The eyes of the boy she loved. They were now looking at her with something that she had never seen in them before. It was warm and caring but she couldn't put a finger on the word that would describe this look best.

She had to force herself to look away from him and focus back on the gift in her hand. With a raging heart she slowly opened the box and a gasp escaped her. Inside the box was the most beautiful bracelet she had ever seen. It was silver and modest but the closer she looked the more details she spotted. There was a small gadget handing by the side, it was a heart. The twisted braids seemed smooth but they were actually covered in small lines.

Bonnie opened her mouth but she needed a few seconds to actually form words. "This is too much, Kai."

Kai ignored her and took the small box from her hand. He scooted closer to her and very gently took her wrist into his hands before getting the bracelet out of the box. "This is not supposed to be some kind of apology-gift or something. I know that the last few weeks have been tough for us and I know that that is mostly on me. I know we agreed to be more open to each other and I am trying to do that.", Kai started talking. Bonnie looked at him but his gaze was stuck on her wrist as he fumbled with the bracelet, trying to close the clasp. His expression has turned serious, his beautiful face laced with regret and pain.

"I don't want you to think that I gave this to you because I want to buy myself into your good graces again, because that is really not the case. I just wanted-", he sighed as he finally managed to close the clasp. "-I tried to find something special that showed how important you are to me." His voice was soft, more like a whisper as he had trouble letting those words pass his lips. Bonnie was stiff as a statue as she listened to his confession. Her heart racing like crazy. Kai started to fumble with the little heart on the bracelet before he interlaced his fingers with hers.

"As for that-", he finally looked up at her and Bonnie's heart jumped. "it's not nearly enough."

Bonnie's and Kai's gazes locked for a long moment, both of them understanding the meaning of this moment. When it came to Kai Parker, what he had just told her was the closest thing she would probably ever come to a confession of love. Bonnie wanted to tell him how much she loved him but didn't because she knew that this was a defining moment for their relationship and any kind of confession on her part would only ruin it.

After a while of intense staring, Kai smiled nervously. "Do you like it?"

A smile started to spread across her own face as she looked down on their still entwined hands. She looked back up, a silly happiness flooding through her system. "I love it.", she whispered and leaned forward to capture his lips with hers. She made sure to keep the kiss as light as feathers because she felt like this was the only way to tell him that she understood what he was trying to tell her.

After a while, Kai let go of Bonnie's hand to place both of his on her cheeks. He drew her in closer, kissing her with more passion now. Bonnie let it happen because it was a natural progression. Something that had been missing from their relationship the past few weeks. And that was why she let herself fall back into the cushions when Kai started pushing lightly. He was now towering over her, eager not to break the kiss and let his hands wander along the sides of her body. Bonnie started digging her fingers into his hair and she heard a familiar grunt coming from Kai as her nails scratched his sculp.

This moment, she really thought it would turn into something more. The feeling was right, the moment was right but somehow it seemed like faith had something against them being together again.

"Kai, get your ass down here."

The faint voice of Melinda reached them and Bonnie broke the kiss. Kai grabbed her face again immediately and drew her lips back to his.

"Kai, your sister-", Bonnie managed to get out between kisses.

"Ignore her.", Kai mumbled as he kissed his way down her neck. Bonnie moaned slightly but then Melinda's voice reached through the door again, closer now.

"Kai, I swear to god, if you don't get your ass down here within the next second, I'll drag you down myself."

Kai quickly let go of Bonnie's mouth and groaned in frustration. "I'm going to kill that brat."

Bonnie punched him for that comment as he climbed out of bed. She breathed out heavily, too affected by what was about to happen that she couldn't just ignore it. She let her head fall back into the pillow and tried to cool her thoughts, disappointment starting to take over. She knew that they wouldn't have sex again if there wasn't the right atmosphere. And that could take a while, so Bonnie tried to be okay with that thought.

"Don't. Move.", Kai said while he was halfway out of the room. He was obviously just as affected by this as her and the demand in his voice made Bonnie hope. She nodded and he slipped out of his room.

Bonnie waited patiently for him to return to her but after 5 minutes she started doubting that anything else would be happening here today. After 10 minutes she got up and took a shower, getting dressed and then went downstairs to search for Kai.

She found him in the kitchen, leaning against one of the counters and talking to Jo and Dawn. Somehow he looked wetter then before. His shirt clinging to him.

"Hello love.", Dawn greeted her first and Jo and Kai looked up.

"You're here already?", Jo asked as she moved forward to hug her. She was just as wet as Kai.

"Been here since last night.", Bonnie admitted and saw Dawn raising her eyebrows out of the corner of her eyes. "What happened here?", Bonnie asked as she saw the entire kitchen was flooded.

"The faucet kind of exploded and all the water was flooding the kitchen." Dawn said, now a loving expression on her face. "Since Joshua is completely useless about stuff like that, Kai needed to step in."

"Did you fix it?", Bonnie asked Kai and he turned to look at her. The intensity of their shared moment was gone, but he still looked apologetic.

"Not really. I need to take a better look at this but I am not in the mood to do that right now. But this should be fixed before we leave for Whistler." He went over to her and placed a quick kiss on her temple. "I'll change real quick."

Bonnie nodded as he passed her. When she looked back at Jo and Dawn they both had this knowing smile on their faces.

"What?"

"Nothing.", Jo was quick to reassure her and grabbed her hand. "Come on, I want you to open my present."

Jo dragged her across the house until they were in her room. She sat down on her bed, tapping onto the place beside her. Bonnie told her to wait and went to grab her present for Jo.

They exchanged presents (Bonnie had gotten Jo this book she had wanted to read so badly and Jo had gotten Bonnie this cute bag they had seen weeks prior in a shop in town) and both thanked the other for the thoughtful gift before she returned to Kai.

Even though they had a passionate moment earlier, that feeling was long gone and they had no time to even think about getting back into that feeling. Christmas was pretty stressful for a family with one or two kids but the Parker family took the cake when it came to traditions. The rest of the day, Bonnie was busy smiling into cameras, talking to relatives and eating the best freaking roast of her life. She took Kai, Jo and Briana over to her house where her grandmother and mother had prepared just much food and they spend a funny night with them. When the day was done, all she could think about was falling into bed and sleep.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

And I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 more…

Bonnie could practically feel Jo tense in the back of the car as the Proclaimers I'm gonna be played through the speakers for the 5th time in a row. Briana was laughing about it in her kiddy seat behind Kai. When the song randomly played on the radio, Kai had instructed Bonnie to play it over his phone, in a loop. He partly had done it to make Briana laugh, but Bonnie knew that the real reason he wanted to hear the song was to piss of his twin.

"Can we please listen to something else?", Jo's annoyed voice reached to the front of the car. Bonnie turned around with an amused face, only to be glared at by the eldest Parker kid.

"Nope.", both Kai and Briana said at the same time, making Bonnie laugh and Jo roll her eyes. There was not much Bonnie could do to make Jo feel better. It was Kai's car, so he got to pick the music. She tried to look apologetic at her but Jo's attention was focused on her little sister beside her again.

They had started their roadtrip to Whistler early in the morning. Joshua had taken the minivan to get all his remaining kids there, but Kai had refused to spend the entire trip stuck in a car with his entire family, especially the twins because they would probably cry through the entire ride. So, he had taken his girlfriend and his two sisters and drove the entire way on his own. They would reach their destination in about an hour. Bonnie wasn't sure if they'd be able to get into the house when they arrived. Kai had driven way faster then his father and they had lost them once they had reached the interstate. Maybe they would have to wait for them to arrive.

"Joey says they are having another break because the twins aren't in a good mood. They shouldn't be too far behind us.", Jo said as if she had read Bonnie's mind.

"Even if they need more time, we're just gonna wait at Rosie's for them.", Kai said and Jo started typing in her phone. Bonnie had no idea what Rosie's was but Jo told her that it was this Diner near their house where they spent a lot of time during the years.

The rest of the drive went by fast. Bonnie finally took the initiative for the music, which Jo was very thankful for and played a lot of classics. And by classics she meant High School Musical songs. Jo and Bonnie had the time of their lives.

When they arrived at Rosie's they couldn't even order anything before the rest of the Parker gang walked in and placed themselves around them. It was surreal to see the family outside of their usual environment, they behaved so uncaring, like a huge weight was taken off their shoulders. Even Dawn and Joshua seemed to get along better. It was kind of nice to see.

After like and hour, Joshua finally said he was going to head to the house and everyone got up. Within a matter of minutes, they reached the house and every Parker rushed inside, trying to make sure they got their usual room. Kai and Bonnie would be sharing a room but Kai had told her to go ahead without him because he was getting Briana's stuff in first. Bonnie decided to help with the twins stuff, who were staying with Dawn.

When Bonnie went inside, it was like she was awestruck. The house was huge from the outside, but from the inside it was even bigger. There was a certain oldschool look in every room but it fit the atmosphere and felt completely okay. While she carried some bags, she passed a dozen for rooms, including a theatre-room. Bonnie couldn't wait to use that one.

After what felt like forever, Bonnie finally reached hers and Kai's room. It was still abandoned sole for her stuff. She sat down on the double bed and looked around. The bathroom was right around the corner and the room itself was nice. Simple but equipped with everything they needed. A bed, a wardrobe, a small TV and a chair. Bonnie half expected to find a minibar in here as well.

"Home sweet home.", Kai said as he entered the room. He placed a few bags down next to Bonnie's stuff and let himself fall onto the bed next to her. He landed with a soft sigh as if he was exhausted. Which he probably was from all the driving.

Bonnie leaned over him, looking down at his face. His eyes were closed. "Tired?", she asked softly as she traced her thumb finger along his chin. That made Kai open his eyes again.

"Just a little, but it'll pass. Guess I'll pass out early today." He smiled, turned his head and placed a soft kiss into Bonnie's palm before he sat back up. "So, you wanna go explore?"

"Shouldn't we, like unpack first?"

"You're no fun at all, are you?", Kai joked and Bonnie chuckled. She liked it when things were done.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The snow was already high when they had arrived, but around late afternoon it had started to snow and the snow masses only grew. Kai and Jo had been exited about it since that meant that the slopes would be good tomorrow. They were sitting in a grill near their house, drinking hot coco and talking. Joshua, Dawn and the smaller kids had left a while ago, leaving Bonnie, Jo, Kai and Joey on their own. Bonnie trusted the three Parker kids to get her home safe since she had no orientation to where they actually were.

Though it was not that late, Bonnie felt the toll of the journey starting to make an appearance. She frequently yawned and Kai started to notice. He tilted his head in her direction and raised his brows in question. Bonnie only smiled, not wanting to ruin this civil get together between the siblings but she was going to ask him when she came back from the ladies room, if they could make their way back home soon.

When she raised, Jo swiftly declared she was going to accompany her to the restroom and they went and left the boys to themselves. When Bonnie was done peeing and got out of the stall, she was surprised to run into Jo, already waiting for her like she hadn't been to the toilet at all.

"Hey.", the Parker-girl said.

"Hey.", Bonnie said with a mild frown on her face. What was happening right now?

"You know, I've been meaning to ask you something.", Jo took a step towards her and leaned against the sink where Bonnie was currently washing her hands.

"Shoot.", Bonnie told her, already having a suspicion where this talk was going.

"I know its none of my business but, I observe things. And it's not like my brother is big on sharing his emotional status but he may have hinted one or the other time that he was confused and – I don't know. Sad? And I think it was pretty obvious in the way you acted around each other the past few weeks, that something happened but seeing you now? I mean, it's not completely gone, this thing between you guys but you seem better. Are you two okay?"

Bonnie turned to look at her friends face, the face that was so much like the boy she loved. Concern was written all over her face and Bonnie knew that it was Kai Jo was concerned about.

Bonnie sighed heavily, her heart felt heavier in her chest. "He said he was sad?"

Jo stepped even closer to her, ready to embrace her. "Not exactly. I read between the lines. An emotionally stable guy might have expressed it this way, but my brother?", Jo chuckled a little and Bonnie herself had to smile from the accurate description of her boyfriend.

"Well, we did have a rough time lately.", Bonnie admitted. "But I guess, you can already guess the reason why."

Jo shook her head. "Actually, no. That is why I am asking. Kai won't tell me anything and I refuse to believe the rumors I heard."

Bonnie turned to fully face Jo now, her expression serious. "What rumors?"

Stepping from one foot on the other, Jo tried to get out of this uncomfortable situation. "You know, these stupid rumors everyone in school is telling when something happens and nobody knows the real story. I heard a few different ones, but some were clearly bullshit."

"And the others?", Bonnie demanded, trying to get Jo to look back at her. "Jo? Tell me."

Jo sighed. "Okay, but you need to know that I tried everything in my power to shut these stories down and I don't believe anything, okay?" When Bonnie nodded, her throat tightening by the minute, Jo continued. "There were these kids that said that he beat you up and now you are too afraid to leave him, which I guess no one really believed. Then some say that you are pregnant and you are disagreeing on how to handle this, which I totally think is bullshit, because I know that Kai would have told me that. And then there is the most popular one, that sounds the most reasonable, given the reputation Kai had before he was with you and people just being little bitches and not believing someone can change."

There was a pause and Bonnie's heart started pounding heavily. What was it? "Jo.", Bonnie pushed her friend to continue.

"They say that he cheated on you."

Bonnie's eyes widened as Jo finished talking. "What? Why? How would they even -?" Bonnie turned around and walked a few steps in the attempt to clear her head. How did it happen that she had become the topic of any scandalized rumors in school, anyway? And why would anyone think that Kai had cheated on her? Was it because he had been to careful not to touch her too often in the beginning? Like he was giving her space?

"This is crazy. Why would they say something like this?", Bonnie asked no one in particular.

"Well, Kai isn't exactly known for having stable relationships, more like messing around with others. I guess that's where they are going with this story."

"You know that this is not true, right? That is not what happened. Kai wouldn't do that to me."

"I know, sweetie. And I didn't want to tell you this in the first place. The reason I even brought it up is because I am worried about you guys. All I wanted to know was if you guys are good again."

Bonnie leaned onto the sink, her breathing was heavy because she tried to fathom all Jo had just told her. She nodded in reassurance of her friend.

"Are you mad at me now?", Jo wanted to know and Bonnie quickly turned to ease Jo's conscience.

"Don't worry, Jo. I am glad that you are so concerned about your brother. He needs more people like you in his life."

Jo smiled. "Well, he has you now so –"

Jo shrugged and wanted to turn to get to the door but Bonnie grabbed her wrist, turned her around and slung her hands around her neck. She embraced her friend, trying to put everything she was feeling right now into the hug. After a moment, Jo pulled away from her and smiled down at her.

"We should get back. It was already risky leaving Joey alone with Kai. The boy is only one step away from becoming his copycat and I think you'll agree that this family can only handle one of Kai's sort."

Bonnie laughed and followed Jo out the door. They were both still laughing when they returned to the table which probably told Kai that he didn't need to ask either of them if they were okay for taking so long in the bathroom. His face seemed to soften as he realized both the girls were in a good mood when they returned.

Bonnie sat down in her old spot and leaned her head onto Kai's shoulder. Even though she had shared this laugh with Jo, she was still concerned about the news she had heard. She knew Kai wouldn't care about the rumors, but she still thought it was unfair to him, anyways.

When her head had rested on Kai's shoulder for a few seconds she felt his hand brush over her knees and she instantly felt better, safer and her fatigue returned just as heavy as it had been before. She yawned once more and this time, she couldn't convince Kai to stay a little longer. She almost felt sad when Kai ordered the check and she was forced to part from his side. His closeness had been so comforting, and she yearned for his touch.

Within the next five minutes the four of them were back in the snow, making their way back to the house. Jo had started a snowball fight with Joey and they had run up front, but Bonnie was too tired to participate in such activities, so she decided to stay behind. Kai didn't want to leave her alone, so he just grabbed her hand and walked along with her. Out here, with just his family around, Kai seemed to mind public affection less then back home.

They walked in comfortable silence, as they watched Joey and Jo disappear around a corner behind which the house way, leaving them in solitude. Bonnie clung to Kai's hand and pressed herself into his side. Kai seemed to notice her need for comfort and let go of her hand in order to wrap his arm around her shoulder, so she could rest against his frame. He turned his head to give her a quick peck against the side of her head, all while remaining a slow pace. Bonnie wrapped her arm around his waist and the feeling for belonging returned to her once more.

"Are you okay?" She barely heard him asking with concern as she was trapped within her own thoughts.

She turned her head slightly so she could see the concern on his facial features and sighed. "Yes, I am just tired."

His eyebrows lit together. "You sure? Ever since you and Jo returned you seemed off."

Bonnie shook her head. "It's nothing. Let's just enjoy these days until we are back home."

Suddenly, Kai stopped walking and Bonnie had to stop along with him. She turned around to face him, his features had suddenly turned serious and Bonnie wondered what was bothering him. She wanted to reach out and grab his hand but he pulled it away.

"Kai?", she asked with a raised heartbeat.

He sighed, like he was tired. "Why aren't you telling me when something is bothering you anymore?"

Bonnie shook her head slightly. She hadn't anticipated this at all. "What do you mean?"

Another sigh escaped him and he looked to the ground. "Ever since that night, you keep your guard up around me. Not that I blame you, I mean I fucked up pretty badly that night. But you keep telling me to be open with you and I really try. It just doesn't come easily to me, but I am trying.", he looked up at her again, his eyes stern but something troubled lay within them. "You haven't told me how you feel in weeks. I can only guess. It's like you sealed yourself away from me. Yeah, we wanted to take baby steps so that we can get back to the way it was, but I fear that that might not be possible. I don't know if I am being unfair right now, but I was thinking I could expect the same openness from you that you demand of me. Or am I thinking wrong here?"

Bonnie took a step further towards him but he backed away. She tried to look as convincing as possible because she didn't want him to think that she had reservations about them. She had been under the impression that they were on a good way back to normal but when she heard Kai's words she couldn't help but agree with him. She had sealed herself away from him. She hadn't talked to him about how she didn't know what to do, how to start new. She didn't ask him to talk about that night, about her feelings and also his feelings even though she desperately wanted to. She didn't even ask him to be with her fully again because she was so scared. Scared to lose him, scared to lose herself over loving a man that was so troubled. Because sometimes it felt that way to her. But she never told him any of that because she had decided to keep him safe from troubling feelings like this. She wanted him to feel good, to experience good things but now she realized that she had made a mistake. He would never get better if she tried to seal him away from any bad feeling. Bonnie gasped as she realized this.

"I-", Bonnie didn't know what to say. His eyes were fixed on her, demanding an answer that she didn't know how to give. Her realization was too fresh as to try and explain it to him but she also knew that her silence could be misinterpreted by him. She opened her mouth to quickly say something. "I know we were going through a tough time lately, but I thought that we were on a good way. Jo told me that she was concerned too but I told her-"

Kai raised his hand to make her stop talking. His eyes had narrowed into slits and Bonnie realized she had said the wrong thing. "You talked to Jo? About us? You talk to her rather than talking to me?"

"That's not how it happened. Jo cornered me earlier. She was concerned about you and I told her we were getting through this."

"Oh my god, Bonnie." Kai had raised his hands to his temples in outrage. "Are you serious right now? You can't just run around and tell my sister about our problems. She might be my twin but that doesn't mean that she needs to be involved in every fucking part of my life. If I wanted her to know about what was going on between us I would have told her myself. This was not you place, Bonnie."

Anger started to stir inside Bonnie as she heard Kai yell at her. "I'm sorry that you can't appreciate when someone that cares about you is concerned about your happiness Kai. I can't read your mind and see if you already talked to your sister or not. A sister that is one of my closest friends, by the way. I know you are not a huge fan of letting other people know what's going on inside of you, but that doesn't mean I have to behave in the same fucked up way. I need people to talk to."

A flash of hurt crossed Kai's face but within a second he had guarded it again. He shook his head and stormed away from her. Bonnie turned and ran after him, not willing to let this argument hang between them like unfinished business.

"Don't you think you are being a little bit hypocritical right now?", he said through gritted teeth.

"Actually, no. Because we are in this mess solely because you are incapable of letting people in. You really think I am going to be as open as I was before with you if I have to fear you running away because of the smallest thing?"

They had nearly reached the house now and Bonnie wasn't the least bit happy about it. Their discussion had turned into a full-fledged argument and she wasn't in the mood to tune down her volume by any means right now. To her surprise, Kai wasn't heading towards the entrance of the house though but made a slight left turn before he turned around and faced Bonnie again.

"Fuck you, Bonnie. If you are so frustrated with my inability of having decent feelings then why don't you end you misery and just leave? I don't want to be responsible for holding you back or keeping you from being happy. The world is such a big place, I am sure you will find someone that can tell you how perfect you are and how much you mean to him every, fucking day. So go ahead, all you need to do is be brave enough to leave. Freedom awaits you, Bonnie Bennett. Just imagine what your life could be like if someone was capable of really loving you."

Bonnie felt like he had slapped her right in the face. His words, his allegations that she only wanted someone to love her and tell her. That she didn't want to be with him for fhihimhim but that she was only after being worshiped by someone, hurt her in so many ways she couldn't even begin to explain. Had this stupid asshole even the slightest idea what he had just said? What he actually means to her?

Bonnie wanted to shout an insult to his face, then turn to the house and disappear. She wanted to grab her stuff and search for another room to stay in it for the night. No way would she sleep in the same bed as Kai tonight. She was so enraged, she didn't want to see his face again today. But it seemed like Kai had different plans for them, because he had already turned around and was running off into the snow. Suddenly Bonnie felt betrayed because she had been the one showing him how inappropriate his behavior has been.

"What do you think you're doing?", Bonnie yelled after him.

"What I do best: I'm running away.", he hissed as he got further away from the house and Bonnie.

"Get you ass back here right now, Malachai.", She yelled with rage but Kai didn't turn around. When he had disappeared from her view, Bonnie stomped her foot into the snow. "You're a freaking asshole, Parker. And asshole and a fucking coward." Then she turned around and stormed into the house. There was not a single thought in her brain about the other Parkers that had already gone to sleep. The only thought she had was the one Parker that had left her by the front door after insulting her and crashing her heart with his words for the second time. When she reached her room, she fell face down into the cushions and started crying.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Bonnie groaned when she heard the annoying beeping of her alarm clock. She hit the silencing button and turned around trying to fall asleep again.

She was awfully tired because she had spent so much time crying last night. When she had finally stopped it had been way past 4 a.m. There had been no sign of Kai at any point until then and all she had wished for in that moment was that he walked in and held her. But he didn't come. He never came during the entire night. Bonnie hadn't bothered checking the bedside next to her since she could feel it was vacated. There was no warmth coming from the other side and she wondered where Kai had stayed or if he had slept anywhere at all or was still running around outside.

Suddenly, she worried about him, if he was okay or not. She felt hot tears forming in her eyes and she wanted to slap herself for being too weak and already worry about that jackass. He had hurt her last night and she was still furious about the things he has said. She didn't want to be the girl that cried her eyes out over some boy but she couldn't help herself.

Maybe it wouldn't have been his bad if they still weren't in such a fragile state. Bonnie wondered if it was always going to be like this when they fought, so overwhelming and painful that she didn't even want to get up. Because if it was, she was going to die from heartbreak at some point. If there ever even was going to be another fight.

Bonnie buried her face into her pillow, trying to fight back a scream. Downstairs she could hear the Parker's starting with their daily routine. Now, she was embarrassed that she had been in such a loud argument last night and hoped that no one had noticed. Bonnie feared going down to join them because she had no answers to the questions they were surely going to have. What happened? Did you have a fight last night? Where is Kai? Are you guys okay?

Bonnie rose in bed, trying to get the thoughts out of her head. It felt like there was nothing she could do to get her head to stop thinking about Kai. Maybe a shower would help. She climbed out of the bed and headed towards the bathroom. It took her over an hour to get out again. She had spent too much time under the hot running water to get her thoughts in order but in the end it didn't work. The rest of the time was used to fix her face, that was damaged by all he crying at night. But nothing a few layers of makeup couldn't fix.

When she opened the door to her room again, there was a quite hope in the back of her mind wishing for Kai to be there when she entered. Accordingly, she couldn't stop the disappointment overtaking her when she found the room vacated, just like she had left it.

Annoyed by her own stupid feelings she tossed her nightwear onto the chair in the corner and let herself fall back onto the bed. She covered her eyes with one arm and breathed in and out. It made no sense staying in here any longer. Someone was probably already on their way to ask if she was okay. When she sat up again, bracing herself for the questionnaire from the Parker family, she startled when the door to her room was opened silently. Bonnie's gaze went to the door instantly and her heart hammered in her chest when she watched Kai slip into the room like a thief at night, trying not to be caught.

He closed the door just as silently as he had opened it, turned around and leaned his back against it. His hands were pressed between the door and his back and he looked at her with regret in his eyes. Bonnie realized that his hair was damp, and she figured that he had probably been in the shower. Then she looked at his face. He didn't look overly exhausted, not different from his usual fatigue, so she figured he had spent the night somewhere else in the house.

For a moment, they both just stared at each other. The distance between them being a torture and blessing at the same time. Bonnie wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around his torso, tell him that she didn't want to fight with him again and that she loved him but another part of her told her that this was not going to solve anything. They needed to talk. Really talk.

Somehow Kai seemed to have the same thought because he lowered his head and sighed. He took a step away from the door but stopped when Bonnie hugged her knees to her chest in attempt to maintain the distance to him. Kai stayed where he was now and put his hands in his sweatpants pockets. Another wave of silence hit the room.

"Bon,…I-", Kai started but stopped because he was trying to figure out what to tell her. She didn't even know if he wanted to fix what had happened between them or if he just wanted to give up. Another sigh was followed by silence and Bonnie was about to break. She couldn't take this anymore.

"Are we over?", Bonnie blared out without thinking. The only thing she could do was watch him as her words sank in.

His eyes were locked with hers, but it was impossible for her to read what was going on in his mind. She needed to know where they stood and she needed to know now.

Suddenly, Kai narrowed his gaze to the ground. Something troubling appeared on his face but Bonnie couldn't fully see it since he had narrowed his head. Her heart stopped for a moment because she feared the worst.

"Is that what you want?" His voice was barely audible, but Bonnie clearly heard the horror in his voice. He was scared as well.

"No.", was Bonnie's only answer and it made Kai look back up at her. His eyes were gleaming from what Bonnie expected were tears that he tried to pull back. Her heart broke in that moment, seeing him so desperate.

"I don't want that either.", he said and a sigh of relief escaped Bonnie. At least she knew what this conversation was going to be about now.

Kai looked at the space next to Bonnie and when she nodded her approval, he slowly made his way over to her and sat down next to her. He was careful not to touch her though and Bonnie still had her legs pressed to her chest.

"I guess we should talk about last night, huh?", Bonnie asked seriously but with a lot more warmth in it already.

"I guess.", Kai said while looking down at his hands.

There was another brief silence as both of them were trying to figure out what to say. It was Kai who found his voice first.

"I'm sorry, Bon. I know I have said that too often in the last couple of weeks, but you have to believe me that I truly am sorry. I'm just-." He breathed in audibly before he continued. "This is really not that easy for me, you know. I try my very best to be someone that is deserving of you, but it's not like I can just flip a switch and be like all the other boys. I don't think I can ever be like that. But still, I am sorry for what I said last night. I didn't mean it. I was just so angry. Sometimes I think it's the only thing I can genuinely feel- anger."

Bonnie turned and reached out her hand to put it onto his. At the contact of her hands, Kai flinched a little but quickly relaxed again.

"I don't want you to be like all the other boys. I want you to be yourself. I also don't want you to give yourself up, trying to impress me, trying to make me happy. I am happy as long as you are honest with me and let me in. You are very much deserving of me.", she sighed. "I accept your apology but only if you accept mine. I said some nasty things myself and I don't know why I did. I didn't mean it. You were right though. I did shield myself from you lately. I didn't even realize it until you said it yesterday. I am just- I am incredibly afraid of losing you."

Kai reached out and caressed her cheek, his eyes were warm but still a little troubled. This expression was the exact proof that Kai was totally capable of feeling something other than anger. Bonnie wished he could see himself through her eyes for once.

"You're not losing me.", he whispered and a shiver went down Bonnie's spine. "Actually, if you let me, I am going to stick around for quite some time." Now, Kai's voice had it's usual spark in it and Bonnie had to smile. Not only because of how he said what he did, but also what he said itself. He wanted to stay and she wanted him to stay. Desperately.

Bonnie looked into his eyes and her heart swelled with all these feelings, she thought she might burst. She leaned in and captured his lips softly. After pulling away, she whispered "I love you."

She instantly felt Kai tense as the words left her mouth. He wanted to turn away from her but Bonnie was quick enough to capture his face with her hands and keep him in place. Kai closed his eyes, but even then Bonnie was able to see how troubled he was.

"Shhh, it's okay. Don't run away from this.", Bonnie whispered softly. She pulled herself closer to him until she was practically sitting on his lap. There was no escaping her now, unless he threw her off with force. Bonnie continued to caress his face with her thumps before she brushed one hand through his hair. The gesture always had a calming affect on Kai and she felt some of the tension leave him, though his eyes were still shut.

"Look at me.", she said while letting her hand wander through his hair. She adjusted her position on his lap so she was sitting more comfortable. After a few seconds of waiting Kai finally opened his eyes and looked at her. His eyes screamed at her, willing to tell her something but his expression was troubled. He looked lost.

Bonnie smiled lovingly. "See, that wasn't so bad now, was it?"

Kai scoffed and turned his head out of her grip. It was useless though, because in her position, she could just reclaim it within seconds. And that was what she did and made him look back at her.

But this time, she decided to let her body do the talking for her. She grabbed his face and crashed her mouth onto his, sealing it in a kiss that turned more passionate by the second. Most of the action originated from her side but Kai didn't exactly put up a fight. A flame was sparked inside Bonnie while they kept kissing, entangled in each other. Something she had wanted for weeks now and that they had denied themselves of.

Bonnie knew that she would have to be the one initiating anything, and so she did. While she started trailing kisses down Kai's chin up to his earlobe, she let her hands wander from his face to his chest until she reached the hem of his shirt and slit her hands underneath it to feel his muscles underneath her palms.

That was when Bonnie felt Kai pull away from her. He softly grabbed her hands and leaned back to have some space from her. "Are you really sure this is the right thing to do right now?", Kai asked her nervously.

Bonnie's heart hammered against her rib cage. Self-doubt started to emerge within her but she shook her head and just said what she felt. Something she should have said a while ago. "Yes, I do."

Kai's head turned and looked at her. His eyes were apologetic and he opened his mouth to start talking but Bonnie cut him off.

"No.", she placed her index finger on his lips and his expression turned surprised. "No, you are not going to talk me out of wanting this. Because I have been wanting to sleep with you for weeks now. I was just too afraid after everything that happened. I should have told you this way earlier and I am sorry that I didn't, but now you need to hear me out: I want you, Kai. I am dying to be close to you, to have you touch me, to feel you. I want to do this, because I miss you so much. You asked me to be honest with you about what I feel and this is what I have felt for weeks now. I miss you and I want you."

Kai's eyes danced along her face, looking for a sign of untruth or uncertainty. Bonnie made sure to look as serious as possible so that he couldn't find a reason to deny her. She would have accepted it when he didn't want to have sex with her right now. She got his point of view but she also knew that he wanted her just as much. She could feel it. So why deny them both what they wanted the most in that moment?

Kai smiled softly at her and gently took her finger off his mouth. His hands went up to cup her face and then he pulled her closer to seal his mouth over hers in a passionate but soft way. When his hands started wandering underneath her own shirt, Bonnie knew that she had gotten her answer, but Kai didn't fail to vocalize his needs either. "I want you, too.", he whispered against her cheek in a deep voice laced with lust.

His actions and words put Bonnie into a dreamlike state, where she enjoyed the feeling of his hands on her skin. The sensation made it impossible for her to think of anything else, so she let Kai take actions into his own hands, which he did fairly quickly. Not that he rushed anything, on the contrary, he took his sweet time undressing her. He caressed every single spot of exposed skin tenderly with a soft peck and Bonnie nearly came undone in his arms.

When he gently switched their positions and lay her down on the mattress, Bonnie finally regained a little control on herself and realized that she was almost completely naked while he was still in his full montage, so she reached out and pulled him down into a kiss while she got rid of his hoddie and pants. Kai was more than willing to help her with the latter and soon their naked bodies were pressed into each other, while they never failed to leave the other's lips unoccupied for longer than a few minutes.

Kai's hands roamed over her body, leaving goosebumps in their wake. The lightness of his touch was so unlike him, that Bonnie closed her eyes and tried to put this feeling deep into her memory. She would have to ask for something like this again at some point, because she knew this was a special occasion and not Kai's usual approach. But she enjoyed it so much, she couldn't live with the thought of never feeling this- worshiped again.

When Kai finally entered her folds, the gasps and moans couldn't be held back by either of them. Bonnie felt like it was the very first time she ever was with him, truly with him. She felt him in every cell in her body, she pulled him closer and closer to feel him and Kai made slow but deliberate strokes inside her, sending both of them into oblivion.

Maybe this hadn't been the most passionate time they ever spent together, but for Bonnie this was still under the top 3. The intensity and importance of it could no be compared to any lustful and sexy encounters they had spend over the course of the last few months. But the connection they had shared was all the more intense and Bonnie had loved it.

When both of them had climaxed, they were completely drained- something Bonnie hadn't expect. They rested their bodies onto each other, as they cuddled close to each other, coming down from their high. Bonnie already missed him, so she captured his lips again and he lazily kissed her back. Bonnie suddenly felt the toll of the sleepless night and she figured that Kai hadn't had such a good night either since he seemed just as sleepy as her.

Moving around a little, they readjusted their position so Kai was on his back and Bonnie pressed her body into his side, resting her head on his chest. She started drawing designs on his chest as she absentmindedly thought about last night when she realized she never asked him where he had spent it.

"Kai?", she asked in a whisper because she didn't want to disturb the peaceful silence between them.

"Hm." He sounded sleepy, but she felt him shift his head so he had a better view of her. Bonnie also looked up to face him.

"Where did you sleep last night?", she asked, a little afraid she might sound accusing even though she was really just curious.

Kai's brows furrowed together. "Really? You didn't notice?"

"Notice what?", Bonnie asked.

"I was here last night." Kai confessed and earned a surprised reaction from Bonnie.

"Say what?"

He chuckled. "Yeah, it was really late. I have spent some time in the chimney room, trying to calm down. Then I just couldn't keep away any longer and I came back here. You were sound asleep and I made damn sure you stayed that way but I lay next to you for a few hours. Not that I slept much during that time, I rather turned from one side to the other and watched you sleep. At 6 I gave up and went for a run. I thought you had noticed something."

Bonnie looked at him for a longer moment before she reached out and caressed his cheek. "No, I didn't. You had to have been very quiet. Maybe you should consider a career as a professional robber."

Again, Kai chuckled as he closed his eyes and leaned into her touch. "Trust me, that is very much up on my list of future perspectives." He grabbed Bonnie's hand in his and turned his head to put a peck into her palm. The sweetness of the gesture put a wave of goosebumps all over her body. How much she loved the softer side of her boyfriend wasn't even for her to grasp.

"I really am sorry, you know.", Kai stated while looking at her hands and playing with it by tracing the lines on it.

"Kai, don't. I believe you and I forgive you. I want to put this behind us, for real this time."

He sat up straight, so he could have a proper look at her, his eyes were serious where they had been soft and vulnerable before. He sighed. "You think we are ready to put it behind us? Because I really don't want anything to stand between us again, something left unsaid that is going to come up in the next argument and bring us right back to where we started."

Bonnie was a little confused how much this entire thing had affected Kai. He was being really concerned about it, like he was genuinely afraid to lose her for good. "Is there anything else you want to say? Because I can't think of anything I might want to talk about.", Bonnie said and reached out to cup his face with her hand.

He moved away slightly so her hand didn't touch him. It wasn't a rude move, he just wanted to stay focused and Bonnie knew that it would have been hard for him to do that with her touching him. "Yeah, I mean. There is something I have been thinking about for a while now. I- I don't want you to think that you are not important to me, because you are very important-"

"Kai, don't.", Bonnie interrupted him because she knew where he was going with this and she didn't need him to explain anything. She knew what he felt for her.

"Yes, you need to hear this.", Kai insisted and looked as serious as she had never seen him before. "I- You know I am not exactly easy to be around and I am very grateful that you are willing to put up with me, I really am. I also know that you deserve so much more than I am giving you right now and I am sorry for that. I want to change that. I want to be able to tell you-", he swallowed. "-to tell you how I feel about you. I just- please give me some time. I promise I'll work on it and be the guy you deserve."

Bonnie breathed in heavily. Once again she reached out to him and pulled him down for a kiss. Kai was a little reluctant but after a second he caved and placed his lips on hers. After their brief kiss, he let his head rest on her chest and Bonnie started stroking through his hair. "You already are that guy.", she whispered into his hair and kissed the top of his head.

Kai didn't reply to that and maybe that was for the best. She really didn't want to fight him on this right now.

They lay like this for a while, without saying anything. Bonnie let her hands roam along his scalp and she felt him relax against her body before she felt his shallow breathing that indicated he was falling asleep. Bonnie didn't mind it, since she felt exhausted from last night as well, so she closed her eyes for a quick nap.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

"Come on, Bonster, you have to have a little bit of faith."

Kai stood a few feet below her, dressed in his full skiing-gear, skis underneath his feet and a helmet placed upon his head. He had risen his glasses on top of his helmet though, so he could have a better look at Bonnie.

She was trying to keep her balance on the skis underneath her own feet. Her legs were wobbly and she desperately clung to her sticks. Even though Kai had chosen a rather harmless rout to teach her how to ride, she didn't dare move.

"I can't do this.", she yelled back at him, looking- for sure- pathetic while doing it.

Kai decided that it would be better to be closer to her and came back to her. Bonnie watched him slide over the snow without any effort and she was a little jealous. It looked so easy with him.

"Don't be ridiculous. There is nothing that can happen here. The worst thing that can happen is you falling on you ass.", Kai tried to reassure her but only earned a glare from her.

"Easy for you to say, you've been coming her since you were a baby, you got enough practice. Me, not so much."

Kai chuckled. "I am aware of that, that is why I chose the easiest course. There are nearly no obstacles along the way and it has the least slope."

Bonnie watched him for a while. He seemed to be genuine and that was the moment Bonnie decided not to be a party-pooper and try to move at least a little bit. When she let to of her sticks just a little she felt herself drift down the hill and she started screaming. "Kaaaaai."

"I'm right here. You're doing great so far. Now, try to take a turn like I showed you earlier."

Kai and Bonnie had trained a few movements without the snow before Kai helped Bonnie on her skis but right now, Bonnie didn't feel like the training session had helped her in any way. She still tried to make a little turn to the right and was happy as it actually worked.

"Look, Kai, I am doing it. I'm skiing.", she said euphorically and tried to look back to Kai who was watching her from behind. That turned out to be a huge mistake because she lost her balance and struggled to stay on her legs before she hit the snow.

"Ouch.", Bonnie remarked before Kai reached her.

"You okay?", he asked while helping her get back at her feet.

"Yeah, I guess. I think I'll be covered in bruises after this trip though."

Kai chucked again. "Well, if that is the only injury you'll have, you'll be okay."

Bonnie stuck out her tongue at her boyfriend but had to fight back her grin the next second. The two agreed that Kai would go ahead and wait for her at a place a few feet away. Nothing too far away, she could always see him and he was in reaching distance if something worse than her falling on her ass happened.

Bonnie was struggling to reach him every time but she was rewarded with a bright smile and sometimes even a hug or quick kiss. She liked this kind of positive rewarding that she thought about doing it all again once they reached the end of the route.

So, step by step Bonnie made her way done the hill with Kai's help and encouragement. She wasn't good but she didn't fall on her ass again either. The sight wasn't necessarily pretty, Bonnie was aware of it, but when Jo, in her perfect snow suit and her smooth skiing, past her by on her way to the meeting point with her family, Bonnie was still offended when Jo started laughing at her. They were nearly all the way down the hill when Jo reached up to them.

Bonnie glared after her friend. Jo should have known better then to laugh at her- someone who was trying this out for the very first time.

"Shut up, Jo.", Bonnie yelled after Jo and kept her gaze stuck to her.

"Bon, don't bother with her. Keep your attention on the road.", Kai warned her but she had lost her focus already.

Her short inattention lead to Bonnie losing control over her skis. She was heading straight towards Kai, who was standing a few feet away down the hill. His eyes widened as Bonnie sped up.

"Bon, you need to slow down.", he said in warning.

"I can't, I don't know how.", Bonnie cried out before she ungracefully crashed with Kai.

When her body crashed into his, both let out an 'oomph' sound and tumbled to the ground. Bonnie lost one of her skis in the process and landed right on Kai's chest. When both of them regained their breaths, Kai laughed a breathless laugh and moved underneath her.

"Are you okay?", he asked while lifting his head off the snow.

"Yeah, I think so. What about you?", Bonnie replied while climbing off him and sitting down in the snow. She loosened her other ski, while Kai sat up himself.

"Yeah, that's what these are for." He pointed to his helmet before he opened it and took it off. Bonnie mirrored his actions and wanted to get up to help Kai up, when she heard a familiar laugh next to her.

Jo's laughter turned hysterical as she moved closer to them. "You should have seen your faces. It was hilarious."

Jo continued to laugh at them and Bonnie saw Kai starting to get annoyed with his sister before something sinister flashed across his face.

Before she could see it, Jo wasn't laughing anymore but looking at her brother in shock. The remains of the snowball that had hit her full force in the face melting on her face.

"This is what you get for laughing, Josette.", Kai teased her with a shit-eating grin.

"So, this is how you want to play this?", Jo said and leaned down and loosened her skis. Bonnie recognized the same sinister tone in Jo's voice and rushed to get up and prepare herself for the snowball that headed their direction.

Jo missed both of them by far but that didn't stop Kai from getting out of his skis and form yet another huge snowball he wanted to direct at his sister. Jo ran away with a mixture of a scream and laughter and duck right at the moment when the snowball would have hit her in the back of her head.

Bonnie was about to hide behind Kai because she didn't want to get dragged into this fight but was hit with a ball herself while on her way. Okay, now she couldn't stay out of it anymore.

Bonnie ran towards Jo and grabbed a handful of snow on her way. She formed a more or less good snowball and threw it at her, hitting her in the back.

Now that Bonnie had joined the fight the two siblings seemed like they enjoyed this fight even more. Jo was starting to throw snow at them at full speed, not bothering to form actual balls, just trying to hit them with anything.

Bonnie tried to keep her distance to Jo, so she wouldn't get hit but she was still too close to her because a snowball that was directed at Jo hit her side of the face.

When she turned to look at the culprit, Kai looked at her with huge eyes and his hands covering his mouth. "Sorry, I didn't mean to hit you."

Bonnie mock-glared at him. "Oh, okay? I thought we were on the same team and then you go and sneak attack me? You are going to regret that.", Bonnie threatened and took off in his direction. Kai started running and somehow now he was the one being hunted. Bonnie grabbed a bit of snow and was able to reach him while Jo kept throwing snow at him to distract him. Bonnie jumped on Kai's back and pushed the handful of snow right in his face.

Even though Kai tried to fight her off, she managed to keep the snow in his face for longer than she had anticipated. But Kai had been shaking too heavily and Bonnie as an extra weight attached to him, made him tumble until both of them landed in the snow again.

They were both laughing like crazy before Jo hit them with another wave of snowballs while they were still lying in the snow.

"Okay, okay. We give up.", Bonnie yelled at Jo so she would stop. The three of them were breathless from all the laughing and running. But at least Jo listened and stopped her attack. She went over to them and offered Kai a hand to help him up but when he took it, he pulled her right down into the snow next to him.

Bonnie and Kai shared another laugh as Jo tried to climb out of the snow and sit down next to her brother. The three of them sat for a while longer, laughing and smiling, before they went and gathered their stuff, heading back to the cabin where they were supposed to meet the others.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Dawn Abbott always liked coming to Whistler with her family. It seemed like they were the most relaxed up here, except when they were in England with her. She hadn't seen all of her grandkids this happy in a while, even though she had witnessed a certain tension between Kai and Bonnie the other day but today they seemed like everything was good.

That calmed Dawn's worries.

She was currently sitting in the cabin, waiting for her remaining grand kids to show up so they could eat when she heard a high-pitched shriek coming from outside. Dawn went to the window to take a peak outside and found Kai and Bonnie in a snowball fight with Jo. They were laughing like the kids they still were and Dawn's heart warmed by seeing this.

They used to have crazy snowball fights with their mom back in the day and Dawn loved the fact that her grandkids, that had to grow up so quickly in the last few months, still found time to fool around with each other.

Dawn looked around in the cabin until she spotted the camera she had brought along the trip. She loved taking pictures of her grandkids in situations like these, where they didn't know they were being watched and just acted like themselves. She grabbed the camera and snuck out on the porch of the cabin, focusing her lens on the three teenagers. She took a bunch of photos of their fight and then of the moment the three were sitting in the snow, laughing together.

When they finally got up and regathered their things, Dawn was about to head inside again, so they wouldn't know she had played paparazzi again, but then she found Kai reaching out for Bonnie and placing his arm around her shoulders after they had gathered their skis. Bonnie reached out to interlace their fingers with her free hand and Kai leaned down to kiss her quickly. Good that Dawn was just as fast with taking pictures and that the camera was so good she could take good pictures even from afar.

She used to think it was unnecessary to have such a good camera, when she got it for Christmas a few years back from Kai and Jo, but now she appreciated it. When she finally went inside, she looked through the phots she had made and when she reached the one of the three of them laughing, she got sentimental.

'Oh, Evelyn, I hope you can see all of this from where you are right now.', she thought and smiled at the memory of her dear daughter.

Author's note: SHAME ON ME. I am such a bad person for taking so long to update. I swear it took me forever to get this done and I didn't even realize it was turning into such a long chapter along the way. But that is totally not an excuse. I wish I could tell you that I will be better, but I think this sporadic updates will be what you will have to endure. I am sorry for that. I never wanted to turn into such a lazy writer. Also, I have to say I am sorry if some of the parts of this chapter don't seem to fit properly. It took me from February until now to get this done and I have forgotten about some of the details along the way. I hope I fixed most of it though. Well, at least now I can post an appropriate update for the holiday season. I wish you all spent the days as you like and that the new year will be nice to you. All the love in the world to the Bonkai-family out there. You rock.