TMNT: Lullaby for Leo

Ch.12~ Happy ending?

Holding him closer I tried to keep myself from crying, I must have said so many things that hurt him over the years. When I asked about Vincent when we were younger... god, he must have been so hurt and scared. Kissing the top of his head I felt a tear fall down my cheek.

"I'm sorry..." I muttered, "so sorry..."

Those habits he had when he came back; it seems so obvious now. His hand over his stomach, light sleeping. It made so much sense, his weak legs, more sensitive demeanor, muttering Vincent when he slept, his worriedness about telling me. God, I feel so stupid for not noticing.

He muttered something incoherently shifting in my arms. Leaning down I kissed his forehead, I need to be strong for him. Protect him from getting hurt like this ever again. Give him the happy ending he deserves.

(Raph's POV)

I started to become aware of the world, first I felt the warmth that surrounded me, then the arms wrapped around me. Smiling I snuggled more into the warmth, not caring how long I had laid here. All that mattered was I was warm and safe in Leo's arms, opening my eyes a tiny bit I saw that Leo was still fast asleep. Mumbling incoherently, I snuggled closer to Leo's warmth.

Wait! Leo knows everything! I jumped up in bed, looking down at Leo who was now beginning to wake up. I pulled my blanket over my face, I can't believe I did that. Everything going to be different now.

"Morning Raphie, come on no need to hide." he cooed, pushing the blanket off my face to kiss me sweetly.

"M-morning yourself... So, nothing changed, right?" I replied nervously.

"Not unless you want it to, what happens next is up to you. Just know I still love you with all my heart." he soothed, I flushed completely pulling the blanket back over my face which made him chuckle.

"I'll tell Father but... I don't think I can tell everyone else yet." I muttered, he pulled me into a comforting hug.

"Tell them when you feel ready, I'm just glad you told me." he hushed, I wrapped my arms around his neck letting the blanket fall off my face.

"Thank you, Leo, you have no idea how much this means to me."

"I know, I love you Raphie."

"I-I love you too."

"I better go down for training, try not to get too antsy in here."

"It would help if you guys would actually let me leave my room, I'm a lot better now; I'm not a cripple."

"I know, but you did give us a scare, and we all know as soon as we let you out of your room you'll be demanding to go topside."

"Tch. What are you guys physic now?"

"No, we just know you. Try to have a good day."

"Fine."

He got out of the bed and stretched before turning back to me, smiling he kissed my forehead. Jeez, he's such a sap; although it's not that bad, I guess. I watched as he gave me one final glance before leaving my room.

Sighing I flopped back onto my bed, I turned my head to examine my left arm. Almost all the wounds had healed, there was only a bit of bruising and some minor cuts left. He shouldn't be such a worry wart.. but I guess I was pretty bad when he saved me. I was practically lying in a pool of my own blood; frowning rolled over to bury my face in my pillow for a moment.

Okay, he had every right to be worried, I'm a suicidal moron who seems to get into life treating situations far too often. Sighing again I paused; it's a wonder they give me any alone time. Sitting up I grabbed a scribbler from under my bed. It had a lead pencil shoved in the rings and a red cover. Pulling out the pencil I opened it to a blank page.

'Moments fleeting in my head, Star's are rising overhead, A passing glance fades away, tomorrow never seemed so far away. Do you wish upon a star, Hoping for forgiveness, Trying to find a way out, Trying to find a way out, Do you wish upon a star, Pleading for another day, Just to find no hope, Just to find no hope? Wounds of long forgotten past, haunting your night's dreams, Care to dance under the stars, for the last time in your life. Do you wish upon a star, Hoping for forgiveness, Trying to find a way out, Trying to find a way out, Do you wish upon a star, Pleading for another day, Just to find no hope, Just to find no hope. My aching bones cry to you, My mind can no longer be saved, just a barren womb, tore from a mother's waist. Do you wish upon a star, Hoping for forgiveness, Just to find no hope, Just to find no hope.' I wrote.

Frowning I realized how long it has been since I could write a song about love. Should I even try to write one... sighing I tried to think just about my love for Leo. Smiling I thought about how it felt when we kissed, or when we would simply hold each other.

"Soft lips do caress, always chastely and warm, love so warm I need not the sheets, just my lover to hold. Caring words spoke in whispers, blushes coloring my cheeks, long cold winter nights full of intimacy. Lovers warmth do tempt my nights, soft words do tempt my brain, seething need of a lover's plight. Sickened but not pleading cure. Shall I sing of love tonight, or dabble in devil's brew, simple words do twist my heartstrings. May the winds always blow you back to me." I sang under my breath, smiling I wrote down what I had just sung.

It wasn't the happiest love song, but at least I know my heart can feel again. Something about all these years apart and the loss I've been living with all these years I had thought I would never heal. Placing a hand over my heart I smiled a bit, I only need to have Vincent back.

Vincent. What is the day today? Frantically I grabbed my phone and checked the date, my eyes widened. It couldn't be, not tonight, today couldn't be Vincents birthday! I gripped the sheets biting my lip, how the hell could I get out to see Vincent?! Even if I told Leo he would never let me go.

Vincent, if I don't get up there who knows what will happen to you? He could kill you; I couldn't handle that not when I was just starting to feel better. All I could picture was his small form lying motionless in a pool of blood that sick bastard telling me that I should have come. Vincent. Vincent!

(Mikey's POV)

"Good morning Raphie!" I called, swinging Raph's door open a bowl of cereal in hand for him.

"Why do I have to be so weak..." he muttered, he looked pretty upset, I set the cereal on his dresser and walked over to place a hand on his shoulder.

"What's wrong Raphie?" I asked worriedly.

"He'll never let me go, but I can't miss this.. Vincent..." he continued, he looked completely out of it.

"You're scaring me, bro, come on talk to me." I pleaded shaking his shoulders trying to make him look at me.

"I'm going to fail him again." he cried, I watched tears fall and fill his eyes.

"Raphie! Look at me, your home bro! I can't help you if you won't talk to me!" I yelled, desperately shaking him to knock him back into reality.

"I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry..." he mumbled repeating it like a prayer.

"Mikey, what's going on?" Leo said I turned to see him looking at us confused and worried.

"I don't know, he's acting all weird," I replied backing off, so Leo could grab Raph firmly by the forearms looking him right in the eyes.

"Raph I'm here, look at me damn it!" Leo yelled, "You're home, you're safe!"

I felt Don's hand on my shoulder as I stared at Leo who was desperately trying to get Raph back into reality. What was happening to my brother? Splinter approached Leo and Raph moving Leo away who was starting to get upset as well.

"You boys wait downstairs while I try to calm your brother." he ordered, I let Don lead me downstairs it wasn't till we started to move that I realized how bad I was shaking.

"It'll all be okay Mikey." Don hushed, wrapping his arm around me to comfort and steady me. What is wrong with Raphie?

(Leo's POV)

Don and Mikey left but I couldn't move; this was my fault. I shouldn't have pushed, looking down I felt the tears fall from my eyes. Looking back up I saw Splinter gently comforting Raph, biting my lip hard I turned away.

"Leonardo please leave us." Splinter stated.

"It's all my fault sensei, I shouldn't have pushed him like I did, maybe then he wouldn't have been reminded of Vincent, of what happened," I replied, he looked at me in surprise.

"He told you." Splinter said.

"Last night, he had seemed fine when I left him this morning; I shouldn't have left him alone..." I replied.

"Raphael please calm down, talk to us." Splinter hushed, "Leonardo try to comfort him."

Nodding meekly, I sat at the edge of the bed and wrapped my arms around Raph pulling him close. Closing my eyes, I began to hum our song, he let out a few heavy sobs shaking in my arms. Soon I felt him gripping onto my arms, leaning into my hold, opening my eyes I kissed his forehead as he started to calm down.

"Everything is alright Raphie, I'm here and so is father." I hushed.

"I can't fail him, not again, you have to let me go." he sobbed, "He'll kill him if I don't."

"Tell me what you want Raphie," I replied.

"Vincent's birthday, I have to go see him, I have to make sure he's okay." he muttered, I stared at him wide-eyed, what does he mean?