I've had this feeling that the story was still not finished. So here it is, a little late but here:
An Epilogue to Aftermaths. Thank you for all your kind words. They mean the world to me.
This is for all of you. Thank you.
Aria felt fingers brush along her cheekbone as her eyes fluttered open slowly. She smiled at the brown eyes staring back at her. She loved waking up like this. Ever since moving in with Spencer into the barn, she couldn't help but fall in love over and over in the early hours of sunrise, when the world seemed to stand still for a few seconds and nothing could touch them. She let out a content sigh while snuggling into the warmth of her blanket once more, eyes beginning to close again as soft, delicate fingers drew a pattern on her skin, lulling her back to her dreams, letting her know she was save, always.
"Wake up, Baby. Today is the day.", she heard her girlfriend whisper and it took her two seconds to sit up in bed, hands bringing up the taller girl with her as her face broke into the widest grin, before leaning forward to drop a firm kiss to Spencer's cheek in excitement.
"Oh my god!", she squealed when they parted, already climbing out of bed and stripping out of her sleeping shorts and her top in a matter of seconds, leaving her in nothing but a thin line of underwear, as she was already heading to the bathroom to take a shower. Hearing no movement other than her bare feet tapping on the wooden floor, she turned, shocked to see that Spencer hadn't moved along, a sly grin covering her features.
"Spencer!", she scolded when she saw that the girl was still in bed and was clearly enjoying the show in front of her, chuckling lightly as she shook her head in amusement.
"Fine! Don't join me in the shower then! I pretty much enjoy having the shower to myself, anyway.", Aria winked, shrugging her shoulders as she made her way to the bathroom, losing the last bit of clothing as she stepped into the shower, turning it on and letting the cool water cascade down on her body.
"I don't think so. You still owe me a proper kiss!", she heard a husky voice behind her, as long arms circled around her waist, drawing her closer. She felt Spencer's form press against her and she bit down a moan and turned, arms coming around her girlfriend's neck, giving her the morning kiss she deserved.
...
Alex didn't move from the bed, her feet grounding her on the cold floor as she looked to the white wall in front of her.
429 days.
That was how long she had spent in this room.
Days of anger, of sadness. Days of longing and frustration.
Days of laughter, and happiness. Days of feeling everything she never knew she could feel.
429 days. And that was all it took to end up in that moment.
The soft knock, interrupted her thoughts, head already turning to the door, when she told whoever was there to come in.
A small smile formed on her lips, as she saw Dean enter the room.
"Hey. Ready for your big day?"
He sat next to her on the bed, not even bothering to ask for permission. They had become friends, real friends, in such a short amount of time and Alex was beyond grateful for having someone like him in her life. She hesitated briefly, sometimes still somewhat unsure of how to behave around people, but she rested her head onto his shoulder, nodding her head to answer his question.
"I can't believe this is it.", she whispered, her voice a mixture of disbelief, hope and fear.
Dean didn't say anything, giving her space and time to say out loud what she was thinking. He knew her like that.
"What if it gets bad again?", her voice was so soft, barely there, that she wondered if he had even heard her speak.
"It won't.", he said, and the determination in his voice made her believe him. Almost.
"I am so scared, of not fitting into this world. Of messing up."
"You will fit in. And you won't mess up, Alex.", he said firmly, the two of you facing the blank wall in front of you as he reached for her hand.
"I won't let you. Your friends won't let you."
She smiled at that, genuinely smiled, because one thing she was certain of. One thing she knew. There were people in her life that didn't give up on her. And that was everything she had needed to get better, to get through the long, exhausting sessions of therapy, to fight the urge to throw up after every pill she took, to make an effort and apologise and take responsibility for some of the things she had done.
"I am really glad I met you Dean. Thank you for helping me save me."
She was getting better with saying nice things, things that mattered and she was less forward now, not wanting to scare people away, not wanting to cross lines again.
"Always." And the squeeze of her hand was all she needed to know that everything was going to be alright.
...
Spencer's fingers tapped nervously on the inside of the passenger door as she looked at the road in front of them.
"Stop that.", she heard Aria say, but her voice was light and she offered her a smile as she glanced over her shoulder to give Spencer an assuring smile.
"Why are you so nervous, Spence? Everything is going to be fine!", she promised and sometimes Spencer envied Aria's view of the world.
She loved her for that, as well. Deeply. She had always seen the best in people, making sure to call Ezra from time to time, after everything that has happened, because she wanted him to be stable and happy again, Spencer didn't agree but she didn't voiced anymore; giving Alex that chance at friendship and comfort when Spencer couldn't; and loving her despite – or for, like Aria would explain – Spencer's dark moments and all the scars she had collected over the course of time, physically and emotionally.
Spencer reached over and let her hand rest between them. It didn't take long until she felt Aria's fingers reach through hers, intertwining them into a steady, firm grip as the world flashed by behind the windows of the car.
...
"She is scared.", Dean Clarkson admitted as he led Aria and Spencer through the empty corridors of the institution, still not quite believing that the day was finally there.
429 Days since he first saw her, 429 Days later he considered her a not a patient anymore, but a friend. All the years he had worked for his father had never let him to a case like this. He had known the moment she was brought in that this would somehow change his life. The memory of that first day she was brought in, forever in his memory.
There she was, slumped into the backseat of a car, handcuffed, and whimpering.
Thinking back, it was very possible she had been pretending, but something in those lost eyes, told him she hadn't.
He remembered going with Aria over the tapes she had brought in, and he remembered how Aria hadn't looked scared at all when she talked about her, but rather worried. He figured then that even Alex Drake must have had a soft side to her and 429 Days later he knew for a fact that he had been right.
...
Aria could feel Spencer's hand tighten in her hers as they walked past the other rooms along the long hallway.
Her excitement bubbling inside her, clouding the nervousness that rested hidden in the pit of her stomach.
She had waited for this for far too long, had fought and tried to get Alex out sooner, but they wouldn't listen to her and Aria was beginning to lose hope that Alex would be trapped in there forever. Until they got the call. The call that told them that Alex would be free, under probation and under restrictions to check in monthly for sessions and treatment and tests. But she would be free, no longer forced to spend her days in a room that resembled a prison and was not much bigger than a closet.
She smiled proudly when she thought of her friend, the bond they shared so complicated and sacred, no one from the outside could understand. Her friends thankfully did, Spencer did. And that was all that mattered.
Aria's thumb rubbed in circles to ease some of the tension she felt in Spencer's body.
She knew her girlfriend was near a full nervous breakdown and she tried everything to stop that from happening.
On the inside, she chuckled as she thought how protective Spencer had become of her sister and she couldn't me more proud of both of them to try and work on their relationship. What blossomed from it, was something nobody saw coming. In a way, Aria thought Spencer and Alex were soulmates, so alike and dealing with things lingering in their heads only they could fully understand. They both carried a darkness that Aria had learnt to discover in different ways. She had learnt how to deal with moments, slips, and she had found ways to reduce the darkness in both of them until they found ways to fill it with something else, joy, love, comfort. They would always carry a dark side to them, Aria knew that. But she was certain that it was only something that made both of them more complex, and more human.
So, when they reached the door and Dean turned to face them, silently asking them if they were ready, because he knew this was a big step for all of you, Aria rose to press a loving kiss to Spencer's cheek and Spencer smiled, nodding her head and facing the door, no traces of fear left in her shining eyes.
...
By now, Alex had packed her bag and she paced around the small room, back and forth, trying to block out all thoughts of doubt and all those insecurities. She sighed and breathed in and out, like she had learnt to do when she was stressed. Calm washed over her body.
She didn't hear the knock on the door, but she felt their presence the second the they stepped in and it warmed her heart.
Before anybody could say anything, Aria's arms were around her waist, a head pressed into the crock of her neck and she hugged her back, squeezing tightly. The short girl stepped back, but didn't lose contact as she reached for her hands, bouncing up and down in excitement, her smile bright like the sun. Alex' heart didn't flip anymore every time she saw her, but she never lost the warm feeling in the pit of her stomach, whenever Aria was close to her.
"Are you ready?", she heard her sister ask as Spencer stepped forward, and she felt Aria's grip loosen, as Spencer stepped into her place and hugged her, too. She tried to take it all in. She and Spencer had fought hard to build up their relationship, Aria being the anchor they both needed for it to happen. And here they were, 429 later, hugging tightly and Alex admitted that this was what she longed for all along, having family that made her feel save, loved. She still thought of Charlotte a lot. And therapy had helped her deal with everything in her own terms, but she would never forget the love they shared as sisters. She felt in a way that she had gotten a second chance to feel that, with Spencer, and she was grateful for it. She could admit that now.
"I am ready.", no longer afraid of stepping into the unknown, into freedom.
Her eyes lingering for a moment over Spencer's shoulder, searching for something that wasn't there and she didn't like the way her heart dropped at the realisation that there was no one else. She shook the feeling away, not wanting to have this ruin her first day of her new life.
She had waited 429 Days for this new chapter to begin. She couldn't wait it finally start.
...
Outside the hospital, Mona shifted from side to side, nervously tapping her foot as she brushed a bit of hair of her face, behind her ear. She had wanted to be there earlier, but there was a problem at work she couldn't leave undone and she hoped she hadn't missed them. She had tried to call Spencer a few times, after sending her a message, explaining that she would meet up with them later, but the Hasting hadn't returned her calls. Mona figured Spencer was most likely pissed that she couldn't make an effort, and Mona wondered when exactly hell had frozen over and Spencer had started to be so freaking protective of Alex Drake.
Shaking away the thoughts, her eyes focused onto the wide door of an entrance again.
Hoping everything was going to turn out fine.
...
She found comfort in the way Aria's hand rested in hers and she felt it even more as Spencer rested an arm around her shoulder as Dean lead the way, carrying her bag over his shoulder. She didn't have much, mostly clothes and a few personal things, but he insisted on helping with something so carrying the bag seemed like a good deal. She hadn't turned back once, since they left the room, the memories good and bad, too much to handle if she would.
When they reached the small reception desk, Lisa smiled at her and she smiled back, not afraid anymore of showing kindness.
Two signatures later, one from her and one from Spencer, it was official.
Alex Drake had signed out of the nuthouse.
There was only one more thing that had to be done.
Taking a step forward she looked up at Dean's compassionate eyes and she felt tears well up, but she fought them back and instead closed the distance as she stepped into his arms. They stayed like this for a few moments. He was the brother she never had, and she wouldn't admit it to anyone else, even though she might have shared some of it with Aria in her dark days of needing to let it all out, but there were traces of him that reminded her of Wren. Despite everything, she had loved him once, and ending his life was the thing she regretted most when she looked back at her past. Dean had never known about him, and Alex knew she could never tell him,, because she couldn't bear the disappointment or the burden it would result into. So, she kept quiet, and prayed in silence for the boy she loved but killed, even though she didn't believe in God. And she cherished the boy she had been gifted and learnt to love him like a brother and friend.
"Be safe.", he whispered and Alex felt him kiss her head.
"Don't be a stranger.", she warned him and looked up smiling.
"Never."
He stepped back, letting Alex be led away by Aria and Spencer.
Three steps and they reached the door. One. Two. Three.
This was it, the moment was here. She was free. It was over. But she couldn't shake off the feeling that something was missing, like a missing piece of a puzzle.
She sighed, gathering the courage that had been built up for 429 days inside her, Spencer and Aria behind her, always, and she pushed through the door.
...
Spencer stayed close behind with Aria pressed into her side, wanting for Alex to have this moment to herself. After everything they've been through, she deserved this moment to be hers. She couldn't help but think back to everything that had happened. But she figured it must have been somewhat worth it, if it meant they would end up just like this.
Still, she had seen Alex' smile and she knew it didn't reach her eyes and that alone broke her heart.
She thought of knocking out Mona for making Alex feel that way, thinking that way she could also return a favour she hadn't forgotten about, but she knew Aria would not be too happy about it, so she pressed that thought back to hid deep in her mind.
She would just have to think about something else, she thought, as she pushed through the door after Alex.
When Spencer had stepped outside, Aria still next to her, she noticed that Alex hadn't moved, and instead stood there with closed eyes breathing in the fresh air.
She noticed Aria's features soften out of the corner of her eye and she could see a silent tear fall from one of her eyes, making her love her even more for caring this much.
"I am free.", she heard Alex whisper, her voice growing louder.
"I am free!", she was laughing, and she spun around in such joy, Spencer couldn't help but grin. Never had she seen her like this.
She heard a chuckle and that's when Spencer noticed her for the first time.
The small girl stood nervously before them, feet circling nervously on the ground, a single white rose in her hand.
Spencer couldn't help but think how perfect this was.
She could see Alex noticed, too, her spinning coming to a stop and eyes wide as she stood in front of her.
"Hi.", Mona whispered with a shy grin, eyebrows rising slightly.
"You're here.", she heard Alex breathe in awe and she could see Mona closing the gap between them, as she lowered the rose and cupped Alex cheek with her free hand, guiding her down to meet her lips in a kiss that Spencer was sure tasted of hope and freedom and a future. And Spencer couldn't wait for Alex to live that future and being there every step of the way, Aria and Mona guiding them through it.
"Always.", she heard Mona promise and everything was well.
The End