Wow. Four days is a long time to not get an update from me. My bad, suddenly my world started turning again now that the quarantine is letting up. I also saw a therapist for the first time in my life this week, so there is been a lot of… self reflection. It will be rare if I have a week in between my updates EVER. But, there may be a time or ten that I have a couple days in between. I make no promises.

ALSO! Please give me your opinions before I post again, because I'll 100% wait until I have heard from at least a couple of you that I know review often. How do you feel about erotic scenes? Do you want them included? And how descriptive? If you've read some of my other stories you know, it gets vulgar. I can completely skip over them and we can JUST focus on plot if that's what you want, too. However, the next chapter would be scene number 1, so give me your preference before I just…. Throw it at you all non-consenting.

There are mistakes. I don't know what to tell you.

Ok chapter 9

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"Are you going to show me your playroom?"

I intended to do just that. However, my nerves were preventing me from taking control of the conversation. Ana was once again, topping from the bottom. Above everything, I am worried I will do the wrong thing, say the wrong thing, push too hard. The last thing I want is scare her off right when I'm closing the deal.

"Is that what you want? You want to see it? You should know I don't expect anything just yet, Ana. We're doing this at your pace."

"My pace. Ok," she said with a shrug of her slender shoulder.

I stood from the couch and guided Ana to follow me upstairs to the locked door.

"I expect we will go through the room. We can have a discussion on what we will and will not be using. And you can let me know your preferences. Please note than any reusable item has been replaced and is brand new. Specifically, to be used for you."

Ana looks up at me and scrunches her eyebrows. "I was a sure thing, huh?"

"There was a hope, yes." I didn't tell her that I had went home the day after confronting her at school and ordered everything I fantasized about using on her.

After she cuts her eyes and shrugs once more, she motions to the door.

As I open it, I take Ana by the elbow and gently guide her in front of me. I want her to feel me at her back.

After a beat, she walks into the room and takes it all in. I allow her to walk around by herself, and touch any and everything she chooses. I want her to feel comfortable here.

I know our agreement will be a bit different than what I am used to, but I have imagined my expectations anyway. I anticipate Ana will get comfortable enough with what we have that she will consider this room to be her's as well as mine.

After she has circled the room, she comes back to where I am standing and leans into me. It's foreign. But, very… Ana. I snake my arms around her and kiss the top of her head. She burrows into me almost as if she's afraid to be in here.

"Are you alright?" I ask her, hesitantly.

She nods her head and remains silent.

This is why we need to discuss our expectations.

A contract. It's a wonderful thing. It's a documented statement of what you do and do not expect from each other. The lines are written in ink, and not to be crossed. I know, just by holding Ana here in this room that she deserves the same respect as a contracted submissive. Even if some of the things she expects are things I would have flat out refused on paper. Like hugging in the playroom.

I guide her over to the leather couch I have sitting in the corner.

I make to sit on a cushion and have Ana sit beside me, but she ends up cuddled into my side with her legs over one of mine. I find that I don't mind it. It feels as if that were my intention the entire time.

"What are you thinking about?" I ask, as I cup her head once more against my chest. It doesn't burn like I thought it would.

She's embarrassed I'm almost sure, if her reddening cheeks are any consolation. "Can we scene, now?" She asks, in a whisper.

What?

That is honestly the last thing I expected her to say. I expected her to tell me she has changed her mind. Tell me that she isn't ready to do any of this quite yet after the scene she had at The Box only months ago.

"Right now? No. No, we… we still need to discuss some things Ana."

"We don't. We can just… figure it out as we go."

I shook my head for a long time before realizing her face was still tucked too far into my chest to see me.

"Not with this," I say. She stays silent, and I know my rejection hurts her. "I believe, just from the few minutes we have spent in here…. I believe you and I might have a few differences in preferences that we should go over. This… what we are doing, here? Is this something you expect from me? I don't say this to be cold. However, hugging and cuddling is not something I have taken part in during a scene. Is this what you expect from me?"

Ana makes to push herself off my chest, but I keep her head still with my hand. She doesn't speak.

Is this what she is used to? I don't want to have to get her to break down her past "relationships" for me. The only experience I know she has had in the playroom is Eric. Is this what they did?

She mentioned he babied her outside of the playroom. Did it bleed into the scenes they did? It made me sick to my stomach to believe so. How many of her habits in the playroom were conceived by actions of his?

Elena was… less than a comfort. She was harsh. Cold. Her words even, had a sting to them. She was the last person I would have turned to, to hold me like this. I just assumed Linc would have been the same.

But as quickly as my thoughts turned to disgust over the idea of the man coercing this girl into the playroom by petting her, I came to a realization. The only reason I am the way that I am… why I treat submissives as something to be kept at an arms length is because that is how Elena treated me. That is how she taught me to treat women.

"Is this what you need, Ana?" I ask her once more.

She shrugs her shoulders and looks up into my eyes. "I don't know. That's not ok?"

I shake my head quickly, leaning down to keep eye contact with her. "I didn't say that. It's ok. I'll do that for you. Just tell me what you need, and I'll do it for you."

"I just… sometimes would like for you to hold me. Like, right now while we're still talking. And after. If we were to have a scene and after, you didn't hold me. I don't think I would feel very good about myself. I just wouldn't feel right."

I had every intention of taking Ana back to my bedroom after we had a few hours in here. I never once considered carting her off to the submissive bedroom and shutting the door.

"Of course. Of course, I will. You need to tell me what you need, Ana. Don't leave it to chance and expect me to anticipate your needs. Not just yet. Not while we are getting to know each other."

"Will you kiss me? When we're in a scene, will you kiss me sometimes?" She asks.

I never kiss submissives. I never hold them. Minimal aftercare.

"I will. I imagine it would be hard for me to refrain from kissing you at this point."

"Then," Ana takes a breath and leans up from my chest. "Can we do something?" She holds her hands out in front of her and references to the rest of the room. It makes me laugh, and soon she's giggling as well.

After we calm down, I get serious. The bulge in the front of my pants screaming for me to get the show on the road.

I intended to have a long talk with her. Get her to open up about her fantasies and preferences. I wanted to make my shy girl squirm, and blush as she tried to explain to me what she wanted me to do to her. However, just by sitting on this couch with her, I realize if we don't get started soon… I was going to embarrass myself with my short-lived performance.

"There are a few rules that I will expect you to follow while we are in this room. Ready?" I ask.

Ana nods, her face already changing into the quiet and docile girl I knew it would. I would have to really concentrate this first time. Maybe the first few times. I am assuming she is tougher than she looks, and she will be wanting to impress me.

I stand her up from the couch and guide her back to the door facing the rest of the room. I stand behind her and press myself into her back. Letting her feel me.

"Your safe-word is Red. If you need a minute, or you are uncomfortable with what is going on, but you don't want the scene to completely stop, your safe-word is Yellow. Understand?"

Ana salutes me, in a childish way. She's a brat to her core, she just doesn't realize it yet. I let it slide, for now.

"When you are in this room, you're not to be dressed in anything." She makes to unbutton her blouse, and I let her continue. "That's right. From now on, the first thing you do when you get into this room, is undress. Whether I am in here with you, or not. Fold your clothes and put them in this closet." I point to the door on the adjacent wall and watch her complete the task. She places her clothes on the singular chair in the coat closet and turns to face me. Her eyes are bright, and large. She looks as excited as I feel.

I normally don't allow submissives to look me in the eye. But, before I can even say the rule, I nix it. I couldn't imagine not being able to see her big blue eyes as I am burying myself in her.

"Don't speak unless you need to safe word, are asking for permission to cum, or are spoken to. It's ok to moan, it's ok to cry, it's ok to scream. But do no speak in this room unless I have instructed you otherwise, understand?"

She nods her head, standing in place by the closet door and playing with her fingers.

"Come here," I point to the floor next to me. "I said, do you understand?" She tiptoes over to me, and let's out a squeak of a "yes". It's very cute, but I have to force myself not to smile.

"Yes, sir." I correct her. And she repeats me in her sweet southern voice.

"You will not call me by my first name in this room. You may call me Sir, or Mr. Grey. Understand?"

I am towering over her at this point. Trying ridiculously hard not to reach down and palm myself for some relief.

"Yes, sir."

"And lastly," I take her by the shoulder and walk her back over to the door. "When you enter this room, whether I am with you or not. After you have taken your clothes off, you will assume this position until I am ready for you. Get on your knees."

She follows my direction, quickly and to the letter. I walk around her body, checking her posture. Ultimately, I just want her to feel beneath me.

"Keep your eyes on me, if you have to turn your head, turn it. But, make sure you keep your eyes on me." I've pulled this rule out of my ass, but she follows me as I circle her.

I touch her toes with my shoe, "make your toes touch, spread you knees." I walk around to the front of her, and back up a few paces. "Spread then wider. Show me how wet you are. Hands on your knees, palms up."

She is beautiful. She's more than I could imagine. I have tried every piece of her last night, but as I look at her here. Prostrate and waiting, I feel such a new excitement that I have to really concentrate so I don't jump on her.

"Perfect," I praise her. She shimmies like a puppy would if it were wagging it's tail and I know I should correct it, but it's so fucking cute, so I pretend I don't notice.

"Now, Miss Steele. We are alone in the apartment. Taylor, and my housekeeper have left for the afternoon. Since it is our first time in the playroom I will ask for your preference, but do not grow accustomed to having an opinion. Are you comfortable waiting here on your knees for me until I have changed out of my suit, and can return?"

"Yes, Sir," she says quietly.

Something tells me there will be no corrective-work with her. She seems so willing to obey, and please. I must focus very hard on the "right now" of it all, or I find a whole new thing to be sick over when I think of what she's told me. Did she act in that manner with Linc? Eager to please? Or was it forced into her?

I shake my head quickly and decide the first task for me will be to find a way to put this out of my mind while we are enjoying each other.

"Then I'll be back," I say, and step around her petite frame.

Once out in the hallway, I work hard not to let my feet race me to the bedroom closet. I feel like a boy on Christmas. Miss Steele is my new shiny toy. The only difference being that once I'm through playing with this toy, I have the unrecognizable urge to care for it and fall asleep next to it. My mother would be so proud of how responsible for my belongings I've become.

My jeans are laid out on the island in the closet ready for my appearance. However, as I am tripping over my pants I am shirking off at high speed, I come to the realization that those jeans suddenly don't feel right. They don't feel enough for Ana. They feel like every other woman I've led into the playroom.

If I were any more of a man, I might pause and consider why I am suddenly so invested in this. So eager to impress this girl. To change bits and pieces of a routine I had written in stone so many years ago. However, I am hardly a man at all, at the moment. I am a dog. And I need to find pants so I can return to my place in front of my very naked, extremely sweet submissive.

I grab a pair of silk pajama pants and jerk them on. Tying the string as I stride quickly out of the room. I slow down as I approach the door, so as to quiet my footing. The last think I need is for Miss Steele to know I have rushed. That would make me seem weak.

Finding a moment to collect myself, I take a deep breath. I don't focus on the changes I have already made for Ana, I don't allow the changes I know are to come once I open this door to hesitate me. I push Eric Lincoln to the side, and I focus on her. And her big, beautiful blue eyes. And I jump.

IF YOU DID NOT READ THE NOTE AT THE BEGINNING OF THE CHAPTER, PLEASE GO BACK UP AND DO SO. Thanks.