Rayne Says: Wow, two chapters in one day? Good thing these are prewritten. The opinionated contest for the gender and type of Mizuka's child/ren is still up for debate. I'll tell you when it's too late. Enjoy!

Property

I'm walking down the hallway, looking for Deidara, when Itachi magically poofs out of nowhere and scares the bejesus out of me. "God Weasel! You almost gave me a fucking heart attack! What do you want?"

"I have some unfinished business with you."

"Excuse me?"

"Follow me," he says.

"Why the hell should I?"

He flashes his Sharingan and I dutifully follow him. I don't really feel like dying today. We twist and turn down the hallways until he reaches a door. I don't recall having seen this door before. Itachi walks in and I follow him. I walk to the center of the room and stand impatiently, waiting for him to get this over with. He closes the door and locks it.

"Why the hell are you locking it?" I ask.

"I wouldn't want anyone to interrupt our conversation," he answers smoothly.

"Fine, what do you want to talk about?"

He doesn't say anything for a while, but he moves toward me and grips my arm. He lifts up the sleeve of my left arm and stares at Hidan's name forever engraved upon it.

"Through your memories and from some research I've done, I have some information about your supposed blood bond with Hidan."

"Supposed?"

"You're not blood-bonded with him."

"What? Why not?"

"To put it simply- you did not have sex with him."

"Why is that relevant?"

"Without it the ceremony is not complete. Unless you plan on having sex with him in the next two weeks or so, the bond should wear off."

"Thank God."

I walk back toward the door, but turn around and look at Itachi/ He's staring at me with a look I can only describe as- loneliness? "Um… thanks Weasel."

"Why don't you call me by my name?" he asks.

"Um, okay, Uchiha."

Suddenly he flashes in front of me and grabs me by the throat. Great, I'm going to die today. Everything was going so well too!

"Never. Call. Me. That," Itachi says through clenched teeth.

"Why not?" I ask. "It is your name."

"I severed those bonds a long time ago," he answers.

"Okay, I'm sorry, Itachi," I say quietly.

He pauses and sets me back down on the blessed floor. "Thanks," I say, turning back to the door. I start to turn the lock when I hear a whisper right next to my ear.

"Say it again," he whispers.

"Itachi," I answer, "you're really freaking me out. Please back away from my body in the next ten seconds or so help me I'll do something violent."

"I like violence," he silky voice replies.

"I can tell," I say dryly.

…

"It's been ten seconds. You haven't done anything."

"Your point?"

"You promised me violence."

"I did, didn't I?"

"You did."

"Okay then," I say. I quickly drop down and sweep my leg out to knock him down. Strangely enough, this works. I seriously didn't think the great Uchiha Weasel would fall for something as basic as that. "How's this for violence?"

I hover over him and suddenly he grabs my arms and our positions are reversed. Now, he's hovering over me. "Um, Itachi? Can you please let me go now?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I haven't punished you."

"Punished me?"

"Yes," he answers, his lips just inches away from mine, his breath tickling my skin.

"What form of punishment are we talking?" I tease.

What the hell? Am I flirting? With Itachi?

"Hidan doesn't hold possession over you anymore. You are fair game."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Anyone can claim you. Whoever gets there first wins, and you just happen to be the prize."

"Is that what you're doing? Claiming me?"

"Yes."

"How so?"

"Like this," he answers, pressing his lips to mine. They're hot and moist and he licks my lips for entrance. I grant it and our tongues wrestle for a short time before he pulls away.

"Itachi?"

"Yes?"

"What does this mean?" I ask.

"It means that you are mine…"

...

...

"Itachi."

"Itachi."

"Itachi."

"Mizuka, you need to wake up now, un," I hear a voice say.

"Huh? Itachi?"

"No, it's Deidara, yeah. Why would you think I was that stuck-up, un-artistic bastard?"

I open my eyes and notice that Deidara looks a little jealous.

"Were you dreaming about Itachi, yeah?"

"Um… no."

"I think you were. You kept saying his name, un."

"It's because I dreamt that he was killed by a pack of rabid weasels in a twist of ironic fate," I lie.

"Oh."

"So why did you wake me up?"

"Breakfast time."

"Oh, I guess that's important. Give me a couple of minutes and I'll be there."

"Okay, un," he replies.

I walk into the bathroom and stare into the mirror. Why the hell would I be dreaming about Itachi? I can't like him, can I? No, absolutely not. He's just a stupid, powerful, know-it-all, tattletale, big fat meanie head who happens to be good-looking. I can agree with myself on the fact that he is good-looking, but then again so is most of the Akatsuki. His personality is also a total dud, who wants to hang with a guy who never talks. Not me.

I clear those thoughts away to make sure that I'm not thinking them when I go to breakfast so that Itachi won't assume things. Yes, we mustn't have Weasel assuming things. I brush through my hair and put on my outfit.

I fake a smile and walk to the kitchen. Since Sasori is on a mission I get to fix the breakfast (even though sometimes it doesn't come out quite so edible). I start scrambling eggs in a pan while singing what I call "The Egg Scrambling Song".

"Oh this is how we scramble the eggs, scramble the eggs, scramble the eggs! This is how I scramble the eggs, 'cause I'm so totally awesome!"

"Tobi likes that song! Tobi's going to sing that song all day long! Tobi's going to sing to Hidan first!"

So Tobi goes off to face certain death.

…Several verses of "The Egg Scrambling Song" later…

"Tobi if you don't fucking stop I'm going to shove your own foot up your ass!"

"Oh! Tobi wants to see- no! Not like that! Tobi does not like that!" Tobi's screams fill the building as he experiences the feeling of his own foot up his butt. I don't envy him a bit.

When the eggs are done, I cover them to keep them warm and start working on the hashbrowns. I almost burn them, but they come out as crispy. I try to cook bacon, but end up almost setting the kitchen on fire (again). I set the table, poor the drinks, and set the food down. "Come and get it!" I yell.

Suddenly, Kisame is at the table shoveling food onto his plate.

"Hey! Save some of that for other people!"

"Then you can make more," he grumbles.

"Why don't you?"

"'Cause it's your job."

"Not voluntarily," I say.

"Too bad."

"You're mean," I accuse.

"I'm Akatsuki."

"Deidara's not mean."

"Deidara is a fag," he replies, "and- hey!"

Deidara walks by and swipes a piece of Kisame's bacon. "I'm not gay."

"Yeah!" I say, sticking my tongue out at Kisame. "You're just jealous because no one would love a whale boy!"

Emo cloud descends upon Kisame

"That's a sensitive subject with him, yeah."

"Oh, um, I'm sorry. I really do like the color blue, you know. It's so… blue?"

"I don't think you're helping, un."

"Um… eggs?"

"Sure," Deidara says, sitting down in his usual spot, "if you'll serve me?"

"Of course!"

I lean down and give him a healthy helping of everything on the table. As I'm starting to go back up Deidara quickly kisses my cheek. I start blushing and quickly leave the room. I happen to walk right into Hidan. He starts to walk by me, but I grasp his arm.

"What, bitch?"

"Um… about blood bonds? Do you need to have sex for them to work?" I ask.

"Why? You not getting any?"

"It's not that. Can you please say yes or no?"

"Yeah, you need to bang for it to work. Guess that works out for you, huh?"

"Um, I guess so. Thanks Hidan."

"Think nothing of it, bitch."

He walks by me and into the dining room. So that makes three out of nine. Sasori's not here, Tobi has his foot up his butt, and Rei's probably in his office. Where are the other three?

I begin walking down the halls, which makes my heart beat faster because this is freakishly similar to my dream. "Hello? Zetsu? Kakuzu? Weasel? Breakfast's ready!" I call.

Suddenly a shape morphs out of the wall and frightens me. "Oh hey Zetsu, breakfast's ready."

"Okay, thank you/ Why don't you be our breakfast? Such nice, pale skin. So tasty/ No, no. Mustn't do that."

He keeps muttering to himself as he walks away. One down, two to go. Who's next? An idea flashes through my mind and I shout, "Kakuzu! Tobi's setting money on fire because he's a pyromaniac!"

Kakuzu appears the second after I finish my sentence, his eyes wild. "Where is that little punk? I told him if he touched my money one more time I'd chop of his hands!"

"He's in the kitchen," I answer.

Kakuzu goes off to save his precious money from nonexistent danger. Now to find Itachi, the person I don't really feel like seeing today. He's so lucky that I somewhat care for his well being. I wander down the hallways calling out his name and searching, but to no avail. A familiar feeling takes hold of me and I start to follow it. These hallways look familiar.

I stop in front of a door and, feeling that it would be polite, knock. Nobody answers. "Dammit Weasel, answer!" I yell. Nothing. I pause and take a deep breath.

"Itachi, please open the door."

The door opens, held by the angel of death himself. "Yes?"

"Breakfast's ready."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

I turn away and start walking down the hall, but am stopped by someone's hand around my wrist. "What are you doing?" I ask.

"You said my name," he replies, totally ignoring my question.

"Yes I did. Now what do you want?"

This is starting to freak me out big time. It's way too much like my dream.

"You talked to Hidan about your blood bond," Itachi says. "Why did you believe me?"

"I didn't but- hey! Why were you messing with my dreams?"

"Your dreams?"

"Yeah, in my dream last night you told me that and then you, um, nevermind."

"What happened next?" he asks, amusement obvious in his voice.

"I'm not telling you," I say.

"Then will you let me wager a guess?"

"Go right ahead."

"This happened," he says, pressing his lips to mine.

Rayne Says: Oh, slight cliffhanger! I'm so mean! I bet you thought the beginning was real, didn't you? How will Mizuka react to Itachi's kiss? Tune in and find out!