Chapter 26 – What You Mean To Me

Dawn stretched through the broad windows of the hospital room. Lisbon sat on the edge of a gurney, as a male doctor took her pressure. He pulled the flap from the pressure gauge on her forearm, scribbled something on his journal, then disappeared through double-leafed doors.

Sleep had come and gone during the night. She had managed to dose off for an hour or two. Her high stress levels wouldn't allow for more. Nightmares awaited right behind closed eyelids. Volker pushing her to ground again and again. Pressing against her stomach with his filthy hands.

She had refused medical care at first, stayed by Jane's side until his hand was ripped out of hers, his gurney ushered into emergencies. Now, as her surroundings swirled at every abrupt movement, she wished she hadn't put up such resistance. Prayed she wouldn't puke on someone's shoes.

She had given reports to both Abbott and Cho. Though the latter refused to believe until he saw proof. They were still slightly mad at Jane, despite his wounds. If not for the murder, then at least for the lies.

She eased off her seat, flinching at the dull echo of pain in her head. She had to speak to Abbott. But needs came first in priority. Jane, then coffee, then Abbott. She shuffled across the floor, followed right in the doctor's path.

The hallway spread beyond sight, light and shapes reflected on the smooth tiles. She gained a rythmic pace, tuning into the sounds of the hospital. The rustle of scrubs and thud of doors as nurses emerged from one room and faded into the other. A mother rolling the crib of her baby. An old woman helping an old man walk. The constant beeping of machinery. The murmur of Abbott and Cho's conversation.

They didn't seem to notice her.

Then Cho stood slowly, his gaze frozen on the opposite side of the corridor. Abbott turned, following his gaze, then went still as well.

There, on the far end of the hallway, the most dashing smile painted across her face, stood Michelle Vega. And she was a sight for sore eyes. The first light of day after the darkest hour of the night. No longer a tortured corpse, but an angel ressurected. With color in her cheeks and life in her eyes.

Wylie wavered behind her, fists curled relactuntly on the rim of a gray hat.

Cho moved to the center of the corridor and Michelle burst into a run. She crashed into his arms. It was one of the rare occasions Lisbon had seen her stoic friend wrapped in such emotion.

As they separated, eyes still lingering on each other, Cho said, his voice slightly harsh, "Thought you would never do anything as stupid and reckless as putting your life in danger."

Michelle smiled, a secret understanding between them. "I promise it wasn't to prove myself."

"Still stupid."

The light flickered in Michelle's expression, before Cho's lips twitched into a smile.

"But brave," he added and she gave him another hug, then stepped back, made a soldier's salute.

"Forgive me, sir. I promise it won't happen again."

Cho's smile broadened.

The girl addressed the rest of them then. Abbott stepped in to give her a squeeze.

"Happy to see that you're alive," he said.

"I'm happy to see that you're unharmed, too. Well,"—her gaze eased on Lisbon—"most of you."

The others turned, unaware of her presence till that moment. Vega closed the distance and Lisbon pulled her into a hug, smiling over her shoulders, closing her eyes.

"Welcome back."

"Thank you."

Earnest looks went in exchange. Wylie joined their group, a grin riding his face as he watched the scene of reunion. A grin soon erased by a single look from Abbott. That specific Abbott no-nonsense look that told someone they were in serious trouble.

Wylie cleared his throat. "Sir."

The boss let the boy teeter under his gaze for a while, before he gave into a cat's smile and patted him on the back.

"Good job, agent."

The smile made a reluctant return on Wylie's face. Like a child given praise.

Vega sought Lisbon's eyes then, mirth giving way to unease.

"How's Jane?" she asked.

The nurse said Jane would heal. Eventually. Though she couldn't make an exact prediction on the time he would arouse. Sometimes patients chose to sleep for days after traumatic events.

Sometimes weeks.

Lisbon reached out and felt the tips of his fingers on the side of the bed.

Open your eyes, Jane, she thought at him.

She patted the fingers softly, hoped for a muscle to flex in response. But Jane's eyes remained sealed, his body completely unmoving. If it weren't for the steady bleep of his heart on the monitor and the ever-so-faint undulation of his shoulders, she would be calling the nurse in panic.

But Jane was just being Jane.

Lost in some corner of his mind, shutting the rest of the world out.

She couldn't blame him. Not really. After what he had suffered, it would be a miracle if he woke possessing all his wits.

She blamed herself. So focused on her own fears, she had undermined his.

"If you keep fighting in the front line, what are the odds of you not getting hurt?" he had said.

She had pushed him over his limits.

And as much as she wished she could erase his nightmares, it would mean going against her entire being to not fight, to quit.

She just couldn't do it. Which left them where? She felt hollow, pondering what possible answer awaited that question.

The door cracked open, startling her. Red hair and a shiny smile broke the stale white of the room.

"Hi!" Grace said.

"Hey!"

Lisbon stood up, took her in a warm embrace. Her former colleague smelled of lilies.

"We came as soon as we heard," Van Pelt said, just as Rigsby appeared through the half-opened door.

"Hey, boss. How you holding up?"

She smiled. "Fine. Thanks." It sounded like a dull answer, but really what else could she say? Dizzy? Sleep-deprived? Like a truck had rolled over her?

Rigsby fumbled in his jacket pocket. "Thought I'd bring flowers, but then"—he pulled a Rubik's cube out of his coat—"I thought Jane would appreciate this more. You know, considering how boring he finds hospitals."

"Oh I'm sure he had enough puzzles to solve the last few days," Lisbon remarked.

"Right, that brain of his needs some rest," Rigsby joked.

"Nah, I bet he's gonna solve it in ten seconds," Cho's voice came as he walked inside.

"Oh come on, I think ten seconds is impossible even for Jane," Rigsby deferred.

Cho extended his fist. "Ten dollars say he'll solve it in ten."

Rigsby smiled, bumped him with his fist. "You're on."

Their smiles quickly became wistful stares as they looked at the object of their discussion. This entire conversation relied on a great "if", still it eased Lisbon's heart for the moment it lasted. It was good to have Cho, Rigsby and Van Pelt around her. It somehow felt right. Familiar.

"I can't believe what he went and pulled off this time," Van Pelt said, her brows knit in concern. She looked at Lisbon. "Can't imagine what would have happened if you had arrived any later."

Silence overcame the room for a while, as they all took in the bandaged chest and arms of their beloved consultant and friend. Still now, Lisbon held some hope that he would throw a snarky remark through his closed eyes.

Later that afternoon, the guys left to bring food and coffee.

Van Pelt sat on a chair by the window, the light enhancing her features. And maybe it was the toll of the last few days, or maybe it was her chaotic thoughts, but suddenly Lisbon found herself craving the pure comfort of girl talk. So she reached out and asked Van Pelt about Maddie and Ben, thinking it would be a nice topic to distract herself with. The sunlight had nothing on how Van Pelt's face glowed at memories of her kids. The woman jumped from one story to the other. Lisbon listened with a smile. And some uninvited wistfulness. Her friend's life sounded so... less lonely than hers.

"Grace," she started, after her narration had long ended. "Do you ever regret it?"

The woman shook her head in confusion. "Regret what?"

"Leaving law enforcement. Choosing a... less dangerous life for the sake of your family?"

Grace opened her mouth, then closed it, tilted her head in contemplation. "I mean,"—her lips twisted sideways in that familiar grimace of hers—"sometimes I do miss the old days, being out in the field, catching criminals, knowing I helped make the roads safer for a little girl."

A huff of a laugh. Van Pelt looked at her with loving eyes.

"But it is worth it. For me at least. Working in surveillance might provide less of a thrill, but it works for both me and Rigsby. So that's what matters for now. Of course, the case could be different for you, boss." And then Grace's eyes widened, a blush warming her cheeks. "I mean, if that's why you asked."

Lisbon smiled. "It's fine, Grace. I'm no longer your boss, remember?"

"Right. It's just, you know, I know you don't really feel comfortable sharing details about your personal life."

"Well, at this point, I am curious how it's not obvious to everyone," Lisbon muttered under her breath, turning toward Jane.

"What?" Van Pelt asked.

Lisbon shook her head. "Nothing."

Van Pelt's face slowly lit up. "I knew it. Rigsby didn't believe me, but I knew it."

Lisbon shook her head, frowning and blushing at the same time. "Knew what?"

Grace's eyes pointed toward the hospital bed, a knowing smile on her lips. "You and Jane, right? Come on, it's obvious. I mean, it was obvious even back in the old days."

Lisbon frowned. "It was?"

Van Pelt nodded.

"Was I that obvious?" Lisbon asked, feeling sudden insecurity. If Grace could tell, then Jane could tell. How embarrassing.

"Not just you. Jane, as well. He had a soft spot for you. I mean, you must have caught him staring at least once."

Lisbon's frown was about to leave a permanent dip on her forehead at this point. "Staring?"

Grace nodded. "Full heart-eyes on."

Lisbon snorted. "Oh that's very hard to believe." But a tiny part of her did believe and it made her want to smile like a teenage girl.

"So is it true? Are you together?"

Lisbon rolled her eyes. "Yes," she finally gave in. Though for how much longer, I don't know. That last part she kept to her thoughts.

Grace closed her palms in front of her lips. "Can I tell Rigsby?" she asked.

Lisbon smiled and blushed, then waved her hand. "Fine."

Grace beamed. She touched her elbow softly. "I'm so happy for you."

Lisbon smiled earnestly.

"Thanks, Grace."

The next morning, when she walked in Jane's room, two wide-open eyes were there to greet her. She took a sharp breath.

"Hey you," Jane said, ever so casually, his voice sounding sleepy.

She exhaled. "Hey!" She studied him a little more. "When did you wake up?"

"Just now."

Slowly, she approached and took the seat in the chair beside him. She folded her palms on her lap.

"How are you feeling?"

He held her gaze firmly while he answered, as if searching something in her eyes. "Splendid."

Lisbon almost smiled, but she pursed her lips. He was still dazed from his injuries, she reminded herself. She decided it was best to tread with safe, easy subjects. The future could wait for now. So she let herself smile and softly nudged his arm with two fingers.

"Everyone's here, you know. They were worried about you. Rigsby brought you a gift." She pointed to his side table.

Jane gave a soft chuckle as he noticed the Rubik's cube. He looked at her again, then.

"So does that mean I am forgiven?" He gave her an easy smile, but a serious gaze.

She swallowed, cleared her throat. "You did catch several wanted criminals."

"That I did. With help from you."

"…And Michelle is alive."

"She here?"

She nodded.

"So that answers whether Cho is happy with me again." He nudged his chin. "What about Abbott?"

"He is willing to let bygones be bygones."

Jane shook his head. "So that leaves one person in question," he remarked. The air became charged once more.

"Jane…"

"Why are you sitting in that chair? This bed looks spacious enough for two."

She weighed his look, then sighed and moved to his side. She immediately regretted it. The distance had helped keep her head clear and her emotions controlled.

Jane's hand moved over the sheets, on her lap, where it found hers. She gave it willingly. She barely kept her walls raised now. All the worry and sadness and anger came rushing through.

"Jane…" she whispered. "Jane, what were you thinking?" Her voice sounded broken, even in a whisper.

"I've told you before. I'm never going to stop saving you. Whether you like it or not."

"You could have died."

"So could have you."

She huffed. "Never, never put me through that again."

For a few seconds, they stared at each other quietly. Then, suddenly, the entire bed shook.

"Jane, what are you doing?" Her hands flew toward his shoulders. "You're not supposed to sit up. Jane!"

He sat up regardless, his face coming inches away from hers. She forgot how to breathe for a moment.

"Lisbon," he said. "Please, let's get out of here."

His proximity made it difficult for her to form a coherent answer. "What?" she breathed. Then, as his request sank in, she pushed back. "No. Jane, you've been shot. You need to rest."

"I have been resting. My bones ache from lying down. Please, Lisbon I need to stretch my limbs."

He deliberately made that puppy look that always managed to disarm her.

"This isn't fair," she complained. Finally, she sighed. "Alright, just a few hours, and then I'm bringing you back here. No trying to trick me and run away."

"I am not going to run away, I promise." He said that in a serious voice. Silly hope sparked inside her.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see. Take the exit on the right."

She had helped him get in a fresh suit and sneak out of the hospital. Of course, she refused to let him drive. At first, he claimed he simply wanted "a farewell taste of Californian landscape". So she just hit the road north, with silent hills on their right and the wild ocean on their left. The more she drove though, the more it felt as though there was a purpose to this trip.

"Why all this secrecy?" she demanded.

"I am honestly not sure of the destination either. I'll just… know when I see it," he defended, raising his shoulders.

"Jane." She looked at him carefully. "Quit messing with me. If you want to avoid the hospital indefinitely, driving us to the middle of nowhere won't do it."

He reached out with both hands and pulled one of her hands from the wheel. There was sincerity in his gaze, which caught her by surprise.

"Lisbon, please, have some faith. I promise I am not trying to cause any trouble."

She nodded, then looked at their entangled hands. She squinted suddenly.

"You're not wearing your wedding ring."

She felt stupid for pointing it out. But there it was, out of her lips, before she could have done anything to restrain herself.

Jane shrugged, withdrawing his hands. "I'm not married."

She looked at him askance, the corner of her lips trembling with a smile she refused to let shape. He didn't give her any other answer, which was bound to drive her mad with questions for the rest of the trip.

Thankfully enough, it wasn't a long trip. For not too many minutes later, he asked her to pull over. She looked around. There was really nothing in the vicinity to call a destination. Just random hills, some shrubs and the ocean. But strangely enough, the surroundings looked familiar.

She heard Jane's door open. She unfastened her seatbelt and stepped outside slowly. He was waiting for her at the back of the car, looking toward the ocean. She joined his side and followed his gaze. The ocean breeze ruffled both their hair. Suddenly, she realized. A knot formed in her throat, as the painful memory flashed before her eyes.

Jane took her hand.

"Let's take a walk by the ocean, shall we?" His voice was tender.

He had asked her to have faith, but she was shaking entirely, as she followed him down the slope. She pulled her hand and buried them in her pockets.

Jane looked at the ebbing sea.

"The last time that we were here, I created a bitter memory for you," he started, his voice hard with emotion. Tears filled her eyes. "One that still hurts you, since it could so easily repeat itself." He looked at his hands, rubbing his thumbs together. "I know a simple sorry won't erase the memory. It won't erase the fear that one day I might leave you, that you'll be left wondering whether it was all a lie, a means to an end."

"Jane…" she whispered. "You don't have to—"

He raised his hand. "No, please. I have to say this. You deserve to hear it." He finally looked at her, his blue-green eyes wet.

"I can't erase the memory, so I brought you here to rewrite it."

It was then she noticed. He wasn't just rubbing his hands awkwardly, he was fumbling with Angela's ring. He raised it between them.

"This ring has been with me for a very long time and ah... it has obvious significance with my past. But it also represents meeting you. If I didn't have this ring, I would never have met you. So in a sense ah… it has the potential to represent my future as well." Now he was the one holding back tears. "And I'm not expecting that you would ever wear it, but I wanna share it with you. And I want it to represent our future together."

Lisbon tilted her head, searching deep in his eyes, wondering if he was saying what she thought he was. And then she didn't need it to wonder anymore, because he said it clearly.

"I want you to be my wife."

Her breath caught. Jane sat down on one knee and took her hand. He put the ring in her palm and closed over her fingers. "Will you marry me, Teresa?"

Tears trickled down her eyes. The answer was so obvious to her that at first she didn't realize she actually had to shape the word with her mouth. Yes. Forever. Always. As if he couldn't read it all over her face.

He couldn't, he said. After all these years, she was still a mystery to him.

He kissed her deeply. It was almost sunset.

"Jane?" she whispered over his shoulder, as he held her tight.

"Hmm?" he asked happily.

"There's something I need to tell you."

"I need to speak to you." Lisbon paused, grimaced. "You're really reading that?"

Abbott raised his head from the comic book he was so engrossed in, slight hurt written over his features. "What? It's really entertaining."

Lisbon raised a brow, as he placed the publication on the countertop of the mini coffee shop. A rack with several other titles was displayed on the side. Abbott span on his tall stool and crossed his palms, addressing Lisbon.

"So, what is it you want to talk about?"

"Jane's contract with the FBI. And mine."

"You want to talk about a napkin, I see."

Lisbon rolled her eyes. "Funny."

A year later

"The suit looks great on you," Jane commented, utterly amused.

Lisbon pouted, as she struggled to pull up the zipper. "This thing is supposed to keep the bees away for real?"

"Here, let me help."

He was already settled in his own suit, had pulled up the veil and all. He looked beyond entertained with the whole task. He helped zip her up, then tucked her hair tenderly behind her ears, before securing her own veil. He gave her a big smile.

"Now the angry bees won't be able to touch you."

She rolled her eyes. "They'd better not."

"That's my Lisbon. Ready to fight the bees and all evil in the world."

They hopped out of the van and walked across the street to the metal gate of an enormous mansion. Jane rang the bell. He loomed close to the camera and waved to whomever was on the other side. Soon, a voice came from the intercom. A confused one.

"Yes?"

"Hello, ah.. in case the suits didn't betray it, we're here for your bees, sir," Jane explained, happy like a child.

Lisbon shook her head.

After a moment, the voice came again. "Mr. Witburg will be with you in a minute."

Soon, a young man appeared from the entrance, rushing across the paved yard towards the gate. He let them in and firmly shook hands with both of them. "Welcome, welcome! I am glad you're here," he said with a big smile. "My father was on the verge of destroying our hives."

Jane nodded. "We're glad to be here. Can we see the bees?" He rubbed his hands with anticipation.

"Of course. But first, let me show you to your bedroom and where you'll be taking your daily meals. Also, don't hesitate to ask our butler should you need anything."

Once they were in their bedroom, Lisbon discarded the veil and tapped her collar.

"We're inside," she said.

"Good work, Agent Lisbon," Cho's voice came from her earpiece. "I'll inform the team that you're set to play the part. As for your protection, should you lose your cover, our agents will be in the area to aid your safe extraction."

"Yes, I am aware… boss."

Jane hopped on the bed and sank in the pillows, closing his eyes.

"I am going to repeat the details of your operation now just so no mistakes are made."

"Sure," Lisbon said, trying to cover her annoyance. She was really happy for Cho's new position. He deserved it entirely. It was simply his all-too-serious formalism she could not get used to.

"Someone in the Witburg family is using the honey business as a front for selling drugs. You goal is to find who that person is, where he or she makes the drugs and how they come in contact with potential buyers. Is that clear?"

"Clear as day, sir."

"Great… Good luck." The last bit was softer, coming from her friend, rather than her boss.

"Thanks, Cho. We'll be fine."

"I know. You're our best undercover agents," he said matter-of-factly.

As soon as she was done talking to her boss, she pulled her cell phone from the pocket of her suit. Her movements became anxious, she had wanted to make the call the whole afternoon. Jane leaped from the bed and scurried to her side. She pressed home dial.

Grace answered in an instant. She was sitting on a couch, holding a four-month baby in one arm.

"Helloo there!" Lisbon's eyes lit with warmth, a wide smile shaping on her lips.

"Hii," Jane echoed her, opening and closing his palm in a greeting.

"Hii," Grace greeted them both. "Say hello to mommy and daddy, Alexandra," she said playfully. The baby girl stared at them, her big emerald eyes wide with attention. And then all of a sudden she smiled broadly.

Jane's lips shaped a silent 'O'. His eyes were almost teary.

"Look at those clever eyes," Lisbon murmured. "She's definitely her father's daughter."

"No, she's looking at you," Jane observed. "I can tell she's already picked a favorite."

"I'm pretty sure she smiled as soon as she saw you," Lisbon disagreed.

They spent a while making silly faces at the phone camera and arguing about whom their daughter loved most. Eventually, they had to say goodbye and focus on their job.

It was a temporary goodbye, Lisbon assured herself. It was always going to be a temporary one. The undercover unit held little dangers after all. Jane had found some comfort in her not taking part in open-fire missions and at the same time, she had never had more fun as a detective. They had even made a name in the FBI, she and Jane. Whenever a particular criminal required a sort of slighter hand to be exposed, it was time for 'the Janes' to put on a show.

So far, nobody had managed to figure them out. And although they didn't know what the future might hold, they had promised to always look on the bright side.

THE END

Author's Note:

I began writing this fanfic in 2014. I never meant it to take so long to finish, but unfortunately college and real life got in the way and if I want to be honest, many times I lost my interest in finishing it. I am sorry for that.

If you're a reader that followed this story from the beginning, thank you for sticking with me through all this time. Thank you for taking the extra effort to read the whole thing every time I 'remembered' to update the story. And if you're a new reader, just having marathoned through this entire story, I welcome you and I hope you enjoyed it. To all of you, I hope you liked the ending and that it was worth your time.

This was my first ever experience of sharing my writing with people and I am honestly thankful for all your comments and feedback, positive or negative. It helped shape my confidence and experience as an aspiring writer. So thank you for that, and I hope you're staying safe during these difficult times. Wish you all the best.