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CHAPTER 3
Jack walked into the squad room to a scene of complete chaos. He stood back and watched the many officers bustling around, searching for any signs of Olivia or her detectives.
It was only moments later when she heard shouting from behind him and turned to see Olivia's detectives each leading a perp in cuffs. Olivia walked behind them and looked surprised when she saw him.
"Okay, guys, process these three then get going. Paperwork can wait until tomorrow." Olivia told her squad.
She stood by Jack and watched as her detectives led the three perps through the squadroom to be processed. Once they were out of sight she turned to face the man beside her.
"I wasn't expecting to see you until Friday, is everything okay?" Olivia asked quietly.
Jack nodded. "Yeah, everything's fine. I just had a thought and I wanted to discuss it with you in person, that's all."
"Uh oh." Olivia smirked. "Thinking is dangerous."
"Yeah, when you do it." Jack teased as Olivia led him to her office.
Once the door was closed behind them, Olivia looked at Jack once more, waiting to see what he had to say.
"Okay, I was thinking. You have an appointment tomorrow, right?" Olivia nodded. "If possible, why don't you take the afternoon after it off. I'll speak to Lucy or Rollins and see if someone can watch Noah for a night. Then we can go out for dinner, somewhere fancy, or wherever you want, and then we can go to a hotel, or to my place, and just do whatever you want, just the two of us."
Olivia couldn't help but smile. "I like the sound of that. We just collared the guys from the girls' case, now they're being handed over to IAB. So I'm sure my squad can handle an afternoon without me."
"Great. Now, do we want a fancy restaurant or casual?"
"In between."
"Okay, hotel or my place?"
"How about we do a hotel and we can order room service instead of going to dinner?" Olivia suggested.
Jack grinned. "I like the way your mind works." He looked out into the squadroom. "What time do you think you'll get out of here tonight?"
"Soon. We're just finishing up. As soon as those guys are processed, the squad and I are going to make a run for the door before anything else comes in."
"Who's catching tonight?"
"Fin and Carisi." Olivia replied. "You wanna come to my place tonight? Order takeout and hang with Noah for a while?"
Usually, Olivia would never invite a man into her home after only two weeks of almost-dating. But this wasn't just any man. This was the love of her life. She knew that because almost twenty years, and multiple failed relationships later, she still loved him just as much as she had when they'd been engaged. The circumstances weren't exactly usual either, they had known each other for so long, kept in contact and always had each others' backs. Now she was nineteen weeks pregnant with his child and they were finding their way towards starting another relationship.
Noah had already met him a handful of times and was amazed that he was a doctor. He would spend the night asking Jack to make his 'sick' toys better, and Jack would oblige, giving them treatments of lots of playtime with Noah to make them better. All she had to do was watch so see that her man was falling more and more in love with her son every day.
They were soon interrupted by a knock on the door and she opened it to see her detectives ready to leave.
"Hey, Liv. We're heading out, just wanted to check in."
Olivia nodded. "Great, I'm just gonna grab my stuff then I'll be right behind you. I'll see you tomorrow morning, guys."
"I've got your stuff." Jack announced, nudging Olivia out of her office and turning off the light.
As they approached the elevator, Jack helped her into her trench coat and then handed her bag to her, making her squad grin knowingly at her.
Never, in all their time with Olivia had they seen her allow anyone to actually help her into her coat. There was maybe a couple of times when she had allowed her partner to hold it for her until she got an arm in, but she always took over half way through.
Once they were in the elevator, Jack pressed the button for the ground floor and the five stood in silence until the elevator reached the lobby.
Olivia bid goodbye to her detectives as she headed for Jack's car. She knew they were still watching when he took her hand in his and kissed it, but she couldn't bring herself to care.
~X~
Later that night, Olivia was sprawled on the couch wearing a pair of leggings and an old NYPD hoodie. She had been lying there for at least ten minutes watching Jack and Noah play doctor with his toys. She had to admire Jack for not brushing off the boy's request that they play the same game almost every night for two weeks straight. It was just another of the many reasons she was slowly allowing herself to think about a future with Jack again.
She rested her hand on the bottom of her belly under the hoodie, picturing what her family would look like a few months down the line.
Jack was focused on his game with Noah, making his toys better when he heard a soft gasp from Olivia. His head snapped to look at where she had sat up straight on the couch.
"Liv, you okay?" He asked, moving towards her. "Is it the baby?"
"Yeah." Olivia nodded. She looked at him and that's when he saw the smile. "Come feel this."
Jack moved to sit beside her and she moved his hand to the bottom of her bump. It was then he realised what had made her react. For the first time, the baby's kicks could be felt from the outside.
"Hey, No." Jack called, holding his free hand out to the toddler. "C'mere a sec. Put your hand on Mama's belly."
Noah did as he was told and moved into the man's arms. Jack swiftly pulled him into his lap and allowed the little boy to reach over to Olivia.
Noah looked at Olivia with a hint of confusion on his face. "What that?"
Olivia beamed down at her boy. "That's the baby kicking. It wants to let us all know that it's okay in there."
Noah's smile grew and he giggled excitedly. "Hi, Baby. I Noah. You my baby and I you brudder."
Olivia felt tears burn her eyes as Noah leaned in close and placed a gentle kiss on her stomach, just above their hands.
"Sorry to ruin the moment, guys, but mama has to pee." Olivia chuckled as she stood from the couch and made her way to the bathroom.
When she returned, she found Noah and Jack back on the floor. This time though, they weren't playing, they were deep in conversation, and Olivia stopped to lean against the wall to listen, unwilling to disturb them.
"You love Mommy?" Noah asked Jack quietly. "Cus you kiss her. Mommies only kiss people they love. Does Mommy love you?"
Jack inched closer to her son and she smiled at his reply. "I love your mommy very much, Noah. I have for a long time. And I like to think that your mommy does love me."
Noah seemed satisfied with the answer and looked at Jack with a thoughtful face. "Is Baby a boy?"
"We don't know yet." Jack replied. "It could be a boy or a girl."
"I no mind. I love Baby." Noah grinned. "You mind?"
"I don't mind either, No. I love Baby too. And so does your mommy."
Olivia looked at the clock and sighed. She hated to break up their heart to heart but it was way past her son's bedtime and it was obvious that he was getting tired.
It took her a while to convince Noah that Jack would come back again to make his toys better, but eventually the young boy agreed and went to brush his teeth. She bent to start clearing up the chaos left behind but Jack stopped her and quickly put the toys away himself.
When Noah returned to the living room, Olivia told him to say goodnight to Jack so she could take him to bed. She was surprised but completely unbothered when he requested that both she and Jack read him his story.
Jack complied happily and allowed Noah to lead him to his bedroom. Once there, Olivia watched Noah pick out his favourite book and jump onto the small sofa bed in his room. He had his own bed across the room, but he preferred to have his story on the sofa, that way there was more space for him to cuddle.
Olivia smiled as she lowered herself down beside her boys. The olive green sofa bed had been bought for the nights when Lucy had to stay, whether it was because Olivia wouldn't be home at all, or it was too late for the young woman to go home herself. Noah had objected at first, saying that green was a yucky colour, but once Olivia had finished decorating his room in the light blues and green tones that she and Noah had chosen, he had come to love the couch and used it all the time.
By the time Jack had finished reading the story, Noah was sound asleep in Olivia's lap with his head against her shoulder.
She stood up easily, knowing she wouldn't be able to put him to bed like this for much longer, and gently laid him down on his bed, covering him with the duvet and ensuring that his favourite stuffed bunny was nearby.
She placed a gentle kiss on his head, assuring her sleeping son that she loved him before she turned on the nightlight and led Jack from the room.
Once they were in the living room, the pair sat down on the couch, Olivia nestled into Jack's side.
"I heard you and Noah talking about the baby earlier, about whether it's a boy or a girl. What do you want it to be?" Olivia asked curiously.
"I would love a baby girl. I'd also love a baby boy. I'm happy either way. All I care about is that our baby is healthy." Jack answered. "What about you?"
"I'm not sure I'd know what to do with a girl." Olivia joked. "Seriously though, I don't care. I never thought I'd get this chance so I'm not gonna be picky."
The two laughed before Olivia spoke up again. "We can find out at my appointment tomorrow. Usually it's at the twenty week ultrasound, but my doctor is away next week so we pushed the appointment up a week. She says if the baby is showing off then she'll be able to tell the gender."
"Do you want to find out?" Jack asked.
"I'm not sure. I kinda like the element of surprise, but I'd also like to be prepared." Olivia mused. "What about you?"
"I don't mind either way. It's your choice." Jack assured her.
Olivia looked up at him. "Do you really mean that?"
He nodded. "Liv, I never thought I'd get this chance with you. I'm just happy it's happening. I don't need to know every detail to be happy about this."
Olivia let his words sink in. She mulled them over for a few moments before she spoke. "I don't know whether or not to find out what we're having. It would be nice to not have to refer to the baby as 'it' all the time, but like I said, I like the element of surprise. Would you be mad if I wanted to find out?"
"Liv, I just told you that it's your choice. I'm not gonna get mad at you if you want to know." Jack assured her. "We should probably start thinking about names, too. Could take a while to find some that we agree on."
"You got any names you like?" Olivia asked.
"I've always liked the name Grace. But I think it's a better middle name than a first name, not many middle names go with Grace."
Olivia mulled the name over and nodded in approval. "I like it."
"Listen, Liv, I don't know what your thoughts are on the baby's last name but…"
"Kellan." Olivia cut him off.
"What?"
"Kellan. The baby's last name is gonna be Kellan. He or she is gonna be your son or daughter. I hope to god that we do, but even if we don't work out, at the end of the day, you're still the father."
"You have no idea how much that means to me." Jack admitted, his voice barely a whisper as he turned to make eye contact with Olivia.
Olivia leaned up as far as she could and cupped Jack's jaw, pulling him into a soft kiss. "I love you."
"I love you too, Liv." Jack smiled. "Now back to baby names. You got any that you like?"
"I'm not sure. What if the baby doesn't suit the name when it's born?"
"We brainstorm and come up with a name that does suit it." Jack assured her. "You had any thoughts on names for a boy?"
"I have no idea." Olivia admitted. "I think maybe we should start studying the name books."
"We could call it Benson?" Jack laughed at the incredulous look Olivia gave him. "Or not. Though we could always use Benson as a middle name."
"I'll think about it." Olivia agreed. "But for now, I think we should just celebrate the fact that we managed to almost agree on a girl's name."
Jack chuckled as Olivia moved to straddle him on the couch, her lips finding his once more as she did.
~X~
Jack watched Olivia closely as she lay on the bed awaiting the ultrasound. The nurse had noted that she had put on a little more weight than she would like, and since then Olivia had been trying to figure out where she was going wrong. Between running the squad and running after Noah, she was barely managing to fit regular meals in never mind snacking.
He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze, trying to remind her that the nurse hadn't told her the weight gain was dangerous, but only that she would need to keep an eye on it.
He had to suppress a smirk when Olivia almost jumped out of her skin upon the doctor entering the room.
"Okay, Olivia, how are you feeling this week?" Doctor Goodwin smiled as she helped Olivia roll up her shirt. "Still good?"
"Yeah. You can feel the baby moving from the outside now so that was an experience." Olivia smiled as the doctor moved the probe towards her stomach.
"Jenny mentioned to me that you've put on a little more weight than ideal since your last appointment. Not enough that it's dangerous or anything. Now, your weight was perfect the last time I saw you, have you changed your eating habits at all?"
"Not in the slightest." Olivia answered.
"Okay, it could just be that Baby is growing a little faster and therefore your body is making you eat more sub-consciously. We'll find out in just one moment." Dr Goodwin replied. "If you look on screen now, you guys can see your baby."
Olivia squeezed Jack's hand as the screen was filled with the image of their son or daughter. She beamed happily as the sound of the baby's quick heartbeat echoed in the small room.
"That's exactly what's going on here. Baby is just growing a little quicker than expected. That doesn't mean that anything is wrong, some babies just grow quicker than others do. So long as you keep taking care of yourself, Olivia, you and the baby should both remain perfectly healthy. Now, do you guys want to know what you're having?"
Jack looked at Olivia and nodded at her, reminding her that the choice was hers. She nodded slowly before she turned to the doctor and spoke up.
"Yeah. If you can tell us that would be great."
~X~
Olivia leaned back in her chair and smoothed her shirt down over her large bump, letting her hands come to rest at the bottom. She still hadn't told the squad that she knew the gender of the baby, despite the constant questions - mostly from Carisi.
Over the two months since the appointment, she and Jack had finally found a large apartment that they both liked. Now they were starting to decorate the baby's nursery while juggling work and Noah.
Olivia sighed as she watched her detectives finish up their paperwork. Recently, she'd taken a considerable step back at work. Mostly she stayed in and completed her paperwork, participating in the discussions in the squadroom and overseeing interrogations, but aside from Barba's office and court appearances, she couldn't remember the last time she had stepped foot outside of the squadroom.
Despite the doctor's assurance that the baby was healthy, she wanted to take every precaution to ensure that it stayed that way. Not only that, but she had noticed a considerable decline in her energy levels, especially when it came to being on her feet all day.
"You okay, Liv?"
Olivia looked up to see Amanda making her way towards her desk.
"I look like I'm about to pop and I'm only twenty seven weeks. What the hell am I gonna look like at nine months?" Olivia grinned, shifting her weight to lean on her desk.
"You look fine Liv. I just came to let you know that I'm heading out. And Carisi is offering to drive you home. But he's not taking no for an answer. So if you need me to, I can hoist you outta that chair and kick your ass all the way to the car."
"A hand up would be great, ass kicking not required." Olivia smirked as she gathered the files from her desk and grabbed her phone.
Amanda helped Olivia out of the chair and smiled at her large bump. "How are things with Mr. Doctor?"
"Amazing. He's been so good with Noah, and starting to set up the nursery and all that stuff. We're finally settled in the new place, Noah loves his room. I've never seen him so excited as he was when we told him that the baby will be next door to him when it's a little bigger."
Amanda grinned at the thought of Noah preparing for his younger brother or sister. On the occasions that she had seen him since Olivia had announced her pregnancy, the boy had done nothing but talk about 'his' baby and all the things he wanted to teach it.
~X~
Olivia thanked Carisi for the ride home and climbed out of his car with a grateful smile. Just as she approached the door to her apartment building, she saw Jack approaching with Noah.
"Hey, where have you guys been?" Olivia smiled before she gave Jack a kiss on the cheek.
"Dinner!" Noah grinned.
"We went to the store so we can cook you dinner. But you're home earlier than we anticipated." Jack explained, taking Olivia's bag from her.
Olivia simply smiled at the two of them as she followed them to the elevator.
Once they were in the apartment, Jack ordered Olivia into a bath while he and Noah began to prepare dinner.
It was only half an hour later when Olivia entered the kitchen wearing a pair of Jack's light grey sweats and a plain white tank top with an NYPD hoodie.
"Hey." Olivia smiled as she leaned against the kitchen doorway, watching her guys cook.
Jack faltered when his eyes landed on Olivia. Her hair was pulled back into a loose bun with a few strands falling to frame her face. She seemed so relaxed. It was a pleasant change from the ball of stress she had been when he had first returned to New York.
"Hi." Jack finally found his words as he watched Olivia fold her arms over the top of her bump and rest her head against the wall. "Dinner is almost ready. Noah set the table. Go take a seat."
Olivia nodded and moved to the table where a vase of red roses sat in the middle. She turned to look over her shoulder into the kitchen just in time to see Jack carrying through three plates filled with a simple roast dinner.
He waited for Noah to climb onto his chair next to Olivia before he laid out the plates. As Jack sat down, Noah jiggled excitedly, announcing to Olivia that he had been allowed to help choose what was for dinner that night.
"That was amazing." Olivia sighed as she placed her cutlery on her empty plate.
"I'm glad you liked it."Jack grinned.
Olivia watched as he leaned over to Noah and whispered something before the young boy ran off to the living room. When he returned, Jack pulled him into his lap and took the bag from him.
"Mama, we gots stuff for you." Noah grinned excitedly.
Jack placed the bag on the empty chair next to him and pulled out a long box. "Noah picked this out especially for you."
Olivia opened the box and tears welled in her eyes when she took in the dainty necklace. There was a single charm on the silver chain, an N with Noah's birthstone on the end.
"When the baby is born, once we have an initial, we'll get another charm with the birthstone in it too." Jack explained.
"It's beautiful."
Olivia removed the necklace from the box and fastened around her neck as Jack retrieved the next item from the bag. When she looked up, her breath caught in her throat when she saw Jack kneeling on one knee in front of her.
She stayed silent as Jack took her left hand in his own while he held Noah to his side with the other arm.
"Liv. You know I love you. I always have. I couldn't ask for anyone better to be the mother of my child. I know that this time around, we've barely been together for eight weeks, but I'm not going anywhere, I'm in this for good. And I'd like to spend the rest of my life with you. So, Olivia Margaret Benson, will you marry me?"
Olivia nodded speechlessly as tears streamed down her face. "Yes!"
Jack handed the ring to Noah and held Olivia's hand as the three year old gently pushed the ring onto his mother's finger.
"I love you." Olivia whispered as she pulled Jack into her, hugging him tightly.
"I love you too." Jack beamed.
The rest of the night was a blur. While they didn't celebrate their engagement like most couples, Olivia wouldn't have it any other way as she lay on the couch with Jack and Noah, watching Noah's favourite movie before they put him to bed.
"Can we wait a little before we get married?" Olivia whispered as Noah stayed glued to the TV. "I'm huge. I don't want to be this size on our wedding day. I want Noah and our baby to be there, and I want to lose some weight before I have to stand in front of everyone we know with all of their attention on us."
"Of course we can. You're beautiful whether you feel huge or not, but if you want to wait, then that's what we'll do."
"Thank you." Olivia smiled, stroking Noah's hair as she realised that he'd fallen asleep. Without another word, Jack kissed the top of Olivia's head and moved to scoop Noah up and take him to bed.