When Love and Death Embrace

Note and Disclaimer: Here's another Igor story. Like anything else in M*A*S*H, I never own it.

I'm in love with you and
It's crushing my heart.
All I want is you, to
Take me into your arms.

When love and death
Embrace, I love you
And you're crushing
My heart, I need you.
Please take me
Into your arms.

When love and death embrace…

Captain McIntyre told me it had been quick. The sniper had shot true and hit his target, without hitting the body that dragged her from the showers. There was no way he could have saved her. Nobody could have.

I should have been consoled that it was fast and easy. Karen did not suffer any pain. I guess that's the way it should go. I don't know.

Karen, my Karen. That beautiful nurse. It was not just the joy she gave to everyone she was in contact with. I mean, she was always kind to every person and patient. It was the happiness she gave me. Being so far from home and away from my son is tough. Karen was the one who made being in Korea worth it. We might have had a chance when we got home.

It had been such a short time since our sparks first flew, yet it was a love that will last forever. We had so many adventures together. I mean, we just hardly escaped Major Burns' wrath when this horrible thing happened. We laughed it off. It was such a relief not to be on report and to have Colonel Blake not care. And that was three nights ago. She was in my arms, happy that we did not get into any trouble…

That did not matter now. I had to serve lunch with Goldman. Just because a sniper came through the camp and cleaned out a nurse does not mean I am excused from spooning out this mush. I still had to pour in the same garbage into the trays and serve them to every person in line. I still had to listen to each stupid complaint and joke, especially from Captain Pierce. I still had to ensure the endless instructions from Major Burns and sometimes Major Houlihan.

When the first people came through those doors, I was trying to hide my tears. I don't normally cry and I told myself to stop, even though I couldn't. Even when I first held my son, I didn't. Keeping my eyes on the ladle and trays was a blessing, as Father Mulcahy would say (well, I think it was last Sunday anyway). Nobody saw me cry through the sweat. Nobody looked at me.

Then, a familiar voice yelled my name – Major Burns. He was the named hero of the incident with the sniper. He was the one who demanded that the nurses' shower schedule be changed. If he didn't, he would not have been the one to cross the compound to supposedly get the girls from the showers to safety. Karen would not have had to accept his offer and be dragged and used as a human shield.

Major Burns also ordered the sniper to be shot. Our helicopter pilot took him out. Captain Pierce was upset. I don't blame him. Karen was dead too.

I was not listening to him. Major Burns was pointing at me and the food and my ladle. I saw his lips move and tried to keep up. I am sure I looked very dumb. Goldman most certainly said something.

Finally, there was sound, like a radio nob finding the right station. "And another thing, Private! You will properly spoon this food into each compartment. You cannot just splatter it all willy-nilly. There is a certain swing to serving this grub." Major Burn sighed. "Now, slap that ladle at my tray and make sure the food hits it right."

I don't know what got over me. It was like Major Burns found my last nerve and I snapped. I did what he said. I picked up a portion of creamed corn and swayed the ladle just the way he told me to. The creamed corn ended up hitting him right in the face.

Next to him, Major Houlihan was horrified. She tried saying something to me, but she couldn't because she was stuttering. She was so shocked. She only threatened to put me on report and pulled Major Burns away. Behind them came Captains McIntyre and Pierce. They declined everything Goldman offered to them. When I showed off the creamed corn, Captain Pierce was excited. It was almost like me, when I was a kid on Christmas.

"Is that the crop that creamed Frank Burns?" he asked me.

"Creamed corn, yes, Sir!" I exclaimed. "Do you want some?"

"If it's good enough to mask Frank, I'll have a tray full," he declared. For once, he held up the tray. "Fill it up!"

I did what Captain Pierce told me to do, crazy as it was. There were no jokes. Next to him, Captain McIntyre did not say anything. He passed me and just took a cup for coffee. It was like he and I were in the same boat. We both had to deal with Karen when she died. We couldn't talk about it.

Maybe it was best that way. Unlike Captain McIntyre, I will never forget Karen though. I can't. She was the best thing that happened to me since getting married and having a girlfriend and having my son all at once. I am sure many will be sorry that she is gone, but only two of us will remember her memory. One is that officer who sits with his cheery friend. He's probably going o drink it all away.

I continue giving people the same food they've been eating since coming here. I also help clean up the Mess Tent before hiding out in my own. All the while, I kept thinking Major Burns will have me called to Colonel Blake office. Splashing food on an officer was an offense…right?

Naw, that doesn't matter. The Army is always full of stupid rules and regulations. I would have been in trouble by now. Besides, I don't care. Why should I, when Karen was gone?

When I knew I was alone and nobody was going to come in, I cried. I cursed everything. Love and death were the same here. What was the point of loving when it was all gong to die? Damn Korea and the Army. And damn the person who sent Karen to Korea! She would have been safe…

Right? She would have been safe, right?!

Somehow, I don't think so. Death was going to take her anyway.

Lyrics and title of the song came from the HIM song "When Love and Death Embrace". I apologize for the sad story. Some things are meant to be written from another point of view.