Chapter Two
First Looks
Ed Mercer allows the two women to enter his office first, then settles in behind his desk, Grayson in the chair to his left and McGee to his right. His newest officer wears the two barred silver shoulder boards over her green and black jacket, and sewn over her left breast is a unique division patch, at least unique for this ship. The green bordered white circle surrounds the green and white outline of an open book, the traditional non-denominational emblem of the Planetary Union Chaplains' Corps.
The redheaded young woman sits stiff, posture precise, back not touching the chair, hands flat upon her knees. Two silver rings decorate her fingers; on her right a band with a crucifix whose arms extend upward and down her slim finger, the one on her left a band with Irish triquetra arranged upright and inverted to form a continuous line. There is nothing in her record on being married, but he recalls that some women dedicated to the Religious life use such a ring to indicate a bonding with God.
She sits motionless, as though any motion might draw danger. He remembers a half dozen interviews with new Commanders and there's not a one he can truly say he'd enjoyed, so he tries to put her at ease.
"So, Lieutenant, why don't you tell us a little about yourself?" He touches a button; a blue holographic record appears in the air above the emitter and the woman's face loses several shades.
'Oh, brilliant move,' he thinks and sees the same words in Kelly's expression. He hadn't thought, realizes that if he'd wanted to consult her Service Record again, he should have called it up earlier. He turns the image off. "Sorry."
"Yes. That's…" she licks dry lips, "okay. Well, I'm 23, born in Aliceville, Iowa. I have two older brothers, a younger sister, majored in Sociology in High School and was going to be a Psychiatrist before I realized what I wanted to do, what I was destined to do."
They've both picked up, hard not to even in that capsule summary, the most flowing and distinct Irish brogue either of them has heard in years and Mercer decides that Gordon Malloy had best tread carefully when he speaks to her in Alara's presence. The Xelayan didn't show any signs of true jealousy at his first evaluation on the bridge, yet her cautioning of Gordon does show that the red uniformed officer is not immune to green eyes – especially should Malloy get caught up in the emerald eyes of their new shipmate.
x
"Destined?" Kelly Grayson asks.
It takes her two tries to meet Grayson's eyes. "I'm not sure, even now, that I can explain what it feels like, to be Called by God for a specific purpose." She apparently searches for similarity. "I think the best way is when you know that a career is what you do, a Calling defines who you are. And when you say 'yes' you discover that that life is the best, truest definition of your life and its purpose."
"Then you didn't always know?"
She takes a very slow breath without moving her body a millimeter, lets it out as slowly, then must gasp for the first breath had taken the time of eight. "I don't think anyone truly knows until that moment when God speaks directly to your soul and tells you that this is His plan for you." Her stare, which had been to Kelly's eyes, slips an inch to her right and she must force a sharp return. "And you always have a choice, but I knew my choice is to accept."
"You make it sound like Recruitment," Kelly says.
"Sorry, I don't mean to," she apologizes quickly, then regroups. "Or maybe I do. Maybe you're right. I was always focused, and in growing up spent tons of time in Church; St. Alphonsus, St. John's, Christ Church, St. Philip's, Ascension, Transfiguration, St. Margaret's; I served in every capacity I could and in a few that I couldn't." And they can read that she has just given her first unrehearsed answer.
"Sounds challenging," Kelly says.
"When lumped together, but not when spread over so many years."
Mercer keeps his smile within; this is a grand old lady of twenty-three, and though she doesn't seem as overwhelmed by nervousness after that rush he can see that it flows below her surface, sometimes like a stream, occasionally like a river.
He has to wonder how she'll handle a river.
In time.
x
"But it was years before I knew that what I was preparing for was going to be my Calling. And when it happened, no one was more surprised than I was."
"In what way?" Kelly asks.
"Well…. That is, I… I knew. I knew I wanted to make this my life, to devote myself to it 24/7/365, I mean to go all the way and become a Priest so I could bring others to know the unbounded depths of Love that I've cherished for so long."
"How did you manage that?" she wants to know. She's not actively trying to break through the rehearsed confidence, but experience has taught her that below that 'placid' and practiced surface is where she can find the truest answers. "I mean, you could be a Priest in a Parish or whatever. Why take on the added job of becoming a Chaplain for what's basically, well, everyone?" Even in that slightly longer than usual blink, Kelly can read lack of confidence. Is this something that gets under the young woman's security and certitude, of has she been trying to avoid addressing it? "We have representatives from fourteen planets aboard and I only know the names of three or four faiths."
"Love. Pure and simple love. I love God wholeheartedly which leads me to the love of His children as my brothers and sisters. It's all a lifelong love affair."
Now that was definitely rehearsed.
x
Mercer noticed that as she got into the conversation her manner had started to ease, even if a lot of what she says is scripted. Nothing wrong with that; he'd prepared and read from a lot of mental scripts in his time, but it's when she's caught off guard that he sees the most.
She'd originally been stiff to the point of rigor and nervous bordering on outright fear, yet she kept steady by answering questions as though listing facts. But as Kelly's questions shift from facts and history to personal things her confidence again falters.
He remembers so well his occasions being on that side of the desk; a lot of his scripts could have benefited from extra polish and far more rehearsal than he'd been willing to devote. Winging it doesn't always work when you fall from the sky.
Still, he lets his First Officer conduct the interview while he sits back and learns.
x
"Is that what led you to become a Priest in the Service?" she asks.
"Yes, I g – Yes."
"And what inspired this in the first place?"
McGee blinks and her eyes widen ever so slightly, telegraphing that she's fallen from the train. She might well think she'd answered that but "Everyone has that one initial spark," the older woman points out. "That one motivation, that one thing that when it happens says 'this is where I want to point my life.' Perhaps it happened even before you knew you wanted to serve God."
x
"Well, I … yes, I – I …." She looks like a dozen answers have collided in her mind before she settles on "Family History."
She doesn't appear to realize that there's more than the esoteric there, that she'd accidently given her new Executive Commander what she needs to probe more deeply.
"Family?"
"Kind – histor… I – well, that is… just…." Her long deep breath has to hurt her lungs, but the exhalation is "Well, my eight times great-grandmother was Bishop of Washington back when it was the capital of the former United States of America and hers was the generation when women began to generally be admitted into the priesthood, at least in many denominations. Not all, but … I mean… yes."
"Really." It was a good thing that that breath had been deep.
x
"Her name was Siobhan nee O'Mallory McGee, from the old sod."
Mercer can appreciate this antique reference, and how she'd used it to distract and to snatch at confidence. He hopes she's found some.
"Her daughter, Mother Erin, who I'm not descended through, my line came through Siobhan and Timothy's son Craig, when in her mid-50's she founded Trinity Seminary in Ulster, Ireland. Erin, not Siobhan that was, not long after the Re-unification."
"I've heard of that," Kelly says.
For a moment McGee looks thrown again. The Irish Unification? Or…?
"Yes. Well…. It was the first Seminary to offer – 162 years after its foundation in the latter half of the 21st century of course – education in Extra-Terrestrial Theology."
x
"You attended Trinity, I see," Mercer remembers that from the holofile he'd read this morning.
"Yes, sir. Their Comparative Religions Department is the best in the world, and family history and pride made me have to try." She looks down for a sheepish moment and her reestablishment when she could talk about the School and not herself is short lived with the admission that "The pride got knocked out of me pretty darn quickly."
"How so?" he asks. The woman doesn't seem to suffer from an overabundance of pride. Right at this moment it seems very much the reverse.
"My Novice Master was – is – a Jesuit and some of the Profs could be rougher, more demanding of progress. Since I'm a McGee, of the direct line McGees going back to Timothy and Siobhan, through Craig not Erin, and wanted to try my hand at Inter-species Faiths, they made sure that if I could survive them, I'd be ready."
"And are you ready?" he asks.
"Y – y-." Her gaze falls away from his, she forces it up again but to the silver Union Central icon behind him. Then out the window to her right, then to the desktop, then to Kermit the frog, then to…. "No, sir," is a whisper that has to be pressed out, but then she locks her eyes on his. "But I'm determined to try."
x
Mercer appreciates the honesty and the resolve. He rarely meets new officers who proclaim themselves 'ready' who are. But calculating that someone fresh out of College would spend four years earning, say, a Master of Divinity Degree…. "How long have you been in the Service?"
"Almost eight months."
"Eight months?" Kelly isn't sure if she should be disbelieving or… whatever. "You're a Union Lieutenant within eight months?"
"All members of the Chaplains Corps are initially appointed as Lieutenants. It's considered a medium designation, neither high nor low."
This "Why?" from Kelly is intentionally sharp. Can the woman regain her flow under tension? In the coming months or years she will have to.
"Well… well, ma'am, a… a lot of … well, Officers… well, they find it hard to be counseled or ministered to by a crew person or even an Ensign." She loses the eye contact, her gaze falls to her clasped hands on her lap and she must force it up again "And if I – if we have to enforce what a person should be doing, lead them from sin as it were - we need some weight."
"Weight." Is she being unfair? No, a Lieutenant rank is a demanding one, implying proof of ability in addition to authority. More than a year ago a Lieutenant had come aboard fast-tracked via decisions more Official and Procedural than earned by experience, and yet she had lived up to and had grown into the job.
But can lightning strike twice on the same ship?
"I was already a priest with an MIT, a Master of Inter-species Theology Degree, before applying to the Corps. The Academy was more to familiarize me with how the Planetary Union functions and my place in it."
Grayson looks to Mercer. "And Alara thought she was Fast Tracked."
x
"The Union," Mercer says, "specifically now aboard a starship, and your priestly duties, I expect is a difficult balance. What I mean is can you minister to not only humans of different Faiths and traditions but half a score of non-human races?"
"Well…." Again her gaze falls to her clenched hands, she forces it up again. "Unlike a parochial Priest who focuses on a specific Faith congregation, a Priest who serves as a Chaplain ministers to his or her own, facilitates the worship of others and cares for all."
Now that had sounded like she was reading from the Corps prospectus.
"We do not proselytize but –."
"Must be hard not to proselytize," he cuts in, deciding it's time to join Kelly in upping the pressure. "You've lived your whole life by one viewpoint, it's right to you. It would be tempting to bring someone across."
"We're not allowed to. We have to meet everyone as we find them."
Sounds like a good rule, but can she live up to it?
x
"That sounds like it could be hard enough in itself." He doesn't know the religions of even half of his crew, having considered that their private businesses, but this woman is going to have to both become familiar with and openly support them in it. "I imagine if you could get them believing all the same you could be quite…."
He doesn't need to continue; she looks like he's leaned across the desk and given her a full handed slap.
x
"Captain…" she fights the words out, "may I have permission to speak openly? Freely?"
"Lieutenant, I don't want you to speak to me in any other way."
"Then, sir, I must begin by telling you that proselytizing is absolutely forbidden of Chaplains, to the extent of being Grounds for Dismissal." There's more fire in that answer than she'd shown in the entire interview. "I just said we do not proselytize; I am to take each person as I find him or her and minister to the best of which I am capable.
"Is it harder than keeping within my religion? Of course. I'm very comfortable as a Christian among Christians, Episcopalians even more so, but God doesn't Call us to be comfortable, He Calls us to serve Him and His children – and that includes the Krill."
x
"The Krill?" He had baited her in an effort to see under her exterior and her preparations for this interview, but he ranges encounters with the Krill somewhere between extremely hazardous and deadly, always done without one's choice. To do so willingly would be foolhardy, while to seek it out must fall under suicidal. Any who would do so voluntarily he must question the stability of. "I think you may be biting off more than you can chew."
"I certainly don't want to meet any of them on a sunlit football field - let alone a dark alley - but like Jonah I've learned that when God tells you to go somewhere, you go."
"Has God Called you to minister to the Krill?" The Tesla had better not be too far away yet.
All the recovered assurance, all the fire used in answering what must have been a sharp insult for her to come back to him as she had, vanishes from the woman. "I – I –." She seeks the answer in Kelly's eyes, then in his before she must admit in a whisper "I don't know. I hope not."
x
He can virtually read her mind, spread as it is across her countenance: 'Why did I ever mention the Krill?'
"Well, I hope that day won't come." He'll hate to tell her about the 'sacrifice' he saw at the Krill worship service during his and Gordon's undercover mission, but he's sure she'll hear. "But what do you know about them?" Up to a few months ago, no one knew anything.
"Well…. " This time he can actually watch her rally. "I'm really proud to say that I'm part of the first class of Academy Chaplains' Corps students to read unclassified excerpts from the Anhkana, a book I understand you're familiar with."
He fights a withdrawal. 'This woman, when she gets her space legs, could be a Mistress of Understatement. That day still gives me nightmares.' "Yes, you could say I had a hand in bringing it to light. I didn't know they released any of it outside Secure facilities."
He and Gordon had gone in and had begun getting a series of holophotoes of the tome in the Cruiser Yakar's Chapel, then captured the book itself along with the ship, which Union scientists will spend the next decade or more plumbing the mysteries of.
"Only the briefest and most carefully selected excerpts, and then because ships we'll serve might encounter the Krill. I would love to get my hands on as many as three consecutive pages."
x
"What did you think of it?"
"Disturbing." She doesn't quite shudder, but he can watch her gather what she needs for the next rally that lets her say "An old boyfriend once described me as 'a soulless bitch', but I'd never thought a whole culture would back him."
Full of surprises, this one. "Maybe you could explain that to me."
She smiles. "The book, the boyfriend or being a soulless bitch?"
He fights an answering smile; has the feeling he's going to be doing a lot of that in the future. "The book. I didn't get even a moment to know what was in it, what with having to duck their High Priest and the guard and the whole running for our lives thing. The boyfriend is none of my business and the soulless I'm really inclined to doubt."
She smiles more readily. "And the bitch?"
"We'll see about that. You have a long way to go before you can reach our First Officer," gets him a grin from McGee and a 'what, wait a minute' look from Kelly.
x
Crystal takes a long, deep breath, digging her fingernails into her clenched palms upon her lap.
"Can I hear of your and Lieutenant Malloy's experiences and perceptions on the Anhkana and the Krill culture, particularly the role of the High Priest as a power on the ship? The Unclassified ones, of course," she rushes to finish.
"Already plotting to take over?"
"Oh no sir." She exchanges a glance with Kelly, the change of the tone of the meeting telling her she might be able to relax. She'll take a chance and test it. She hopes no one noticed the long intake of air and the forced relaxation of her shoulders, though her hands really hurt and she wishes this interview would be over so she can wash the blood off her palms. "Not yet, anyway," she assures him in that same fake ('is it over the top?') tone.
He looks from one woman to the next. "I'm starting to realize that with a female XO, CMO, CSO and now Chaplain I'd better watch my back."
"You could spend more time hanging around Bortus," Kelly assures him. "Or Yaphit."
He thinks this over. "No thanks, Bortus and Yaphit together are a heady mixture. You'll see what I mean," he tells her.
"I look forward to it." 'One more 'heady mixture' today and I'm gonna faint.'
"In the meantime, I'll see what I can do about excerpts of the Anhkana, but you're already one up on me. Plus, I'm sure Gordon, once you get him started, could talk your ears off."
"Good luck following him, though," Grayson quips.
"No worries there, Commander." 'Who is Gordon? Why follow? What do I say now? Follow? Oh.' "We had a demanding language curriculum; I studied Aramaic, Greek, Hebrew, Latin and tried Earth Political Science. Aramaic was easier."
x
'Let's hear it for inspired non sequiturs,' he thinks. A confirming glance from Grayson cements his decision. He extends his hand across the desk. "Welcome aboard the Orville, Lieutenant."
x
She checks her hand. No blood, just four very deep indentations. 'Yeah, bleed on my Captain. Right. Great way to make a first impression.'
She's late in reaching out and taking his hand, then rushes and can't think how she's going to cover for this gaff, but when she clasps hands with him, he seems not to notice the delay.
'Or can he feel that I'm shaking so hard that if I put my hand on the bulkhead, I'll vibrate all the rivets loose?'
x
As Kelly also shakes her new crewmate's hand, she asks a question she normally would not: "Do you prefer Lieutenant or Mother?"
She hesitates over the choice, and Mercer can read 'what if I ask for too much?' "M - Mother, I think. Anyone who looks at me will see the rank, but my Calling is to establish a closer bond with the crew.
"But please, off duty please make it Crystal."