Chapter 8 - Telling It All

A/N: Fellow humans! I just want to say that I'm sorry if the last chapter upset any of you and by that I mean Ace's breakdown. My friend, WhiteyWolf26, pointed out that I should maybe put a warning before each chapter if there's any breakdowns and such like that.

Again, I am sorry if any of you were upset. I'm just going to say as a precaution to be prepared for every chapter, I don't know what's too much for those who get triggered so for each chapter be prepared. Ace is a 'dark' character so he's bound to get pretty down and sad but it's not going to be piles of that I just want to be careful for those who get affected by the sadness/breakdown things. So I am sorry if any were upset.

And you guys are so amazing! You're all so kind and sweet, I really am grateful for all your support and kindness. Thank you!

I'm sorry I haven't updated Together Forever in a while, I'm trying to work on it but I'm a little stuck. You guys have any ideas? Like maybe for the beginning to start it off? I think I'm having difficulty with just that and if I get a solid start off then I can continue it.

Also, the thing Shanks wears, would it be considered a coat, cloak or cape? I think coat. Or something on the lines like that.

OH AND IMPORTANTLY!

If some of you think the moment between Ace and Shanks seemed too OOC, please read my friend, WhiteyWolf26, review for chapter 7. It makes a really good point.

WARNING: This chapter does contain a breakdown-ish. Be prepared for sadness and self-guilt. It's literally the beginning of the chapter, and the rest. Just be prepared.

Now, time for the chapter!

Read and Enjoy

Two days. It was only two days since Ace broke down to Shanks and yet he still felt raw. He couldn't focus on anything or anyone. He probably shouldn't even be going to training, he'd most likely be a bother.

But before he could get off of the Red Force's deck and back to his own ship he was stopped by Shanks spotting him, waving him over to where he sat on a crate.

With a deep sigh and some reluctance, he walked over. He watched Shanks scoot over and pat the spot next to him, his invitation clear. Ace complied and sat close enough to brush shoulders with the man.

Shanks could easily tell Ace wasn't feeling any better. He looked so tired and dead.

"Instead of sparring with Armament Haki like we've been doing, I want to work on Conqueror's Haki," he announced. Now that got him a confused look.

Shanks sighed. "You unleashed a burst of Conqueror's Haki after Deuce got hurt, meaning you unlocked it. So we need to train and focus on that so no one gets hurt."

Ace frowned at him. He could remember something inside him after he watched Deuce get stabbed, something powerful… it was the same feeling he felt after watching Luffy almost get killed by Bluejam…

"Shanks, I don't believe that was my first time. I think I unlocked way before that," he said slowly. His mentor gave him a puzzled look that held also concern.

"Ace, I know it'll be hard, given that when Conqueror's Haki is unlocked it's because of danger and life threatening situations but, I need you to tell me when and what happened. Alright?" Shanks asked carefully, hoping the kid would listen.

Ace swallowed a lump in his throat and clenched his fists tightly. He didn't want to talk about it, but he knew he had to. He released a shaky and breath and said quietly, "In order to do that then I need to tell you some other things."

Shanks felt himself straighten and note the pain Ace was trying to conceal but was failing.

"I.. I had another brother before I met Luffy. But then we all became brothers later, vowing it over a cup of sake."

Shanks felt his heart drop. He could already tell which direction this story was going to end in. Ace continued on but had brought his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, bowing his head.

"His name was Sabo. He was a noble from the Goa Kingdom, but he ran away from there because he hated it, hated being controlled and toyed with like some doll. He ended up meeting me and well, long story short we started a pirate fund so we could sail out to sea one day, buy our own ship and all," a small smile curled at his lips, remembering how excited he was.

Shanks couldn't help but smile too. He could picture a small Ace running around, grabbing little jewels and stuffing them into a box with a big grin.

But the smile died when Ace's face fell, looking so miserable and sad.

"First you should know I wanted nothing to do with Luffy and about these Bluejam pirates, I was a really angry kid…"

Talking about himself was hard, how he was such a jerk. And he felt his old anger against the Bluejam pirates flare up when he got to explaining them. He could feel Shanks literally shake with rage when he told him about what happened with Luffy and Porchemy.

"But it only got worse. Sabo's father came back for him, and Sabo went back to the city." At Shanks's shocked expression he quickly explained, "Not because he wanted to no, never. But because he had no choice, me and Luffy were held hostage and if he didn't go back we'd be killed."

Shanks gripped the edge of the crate so tightly that it cracked under his strength. "What?" he hissed. Ace nodded, feeling his heart being torn once again.

"Bluejam had exploded the Gray Terminal, wanting to impress the incoming World Nobles. But when he and his crew left to escape the Nobles locked the Great Gates, having been used. They wanted to know the location of their treasure that we stole to die with it, and they were going to… they were bringing the sword down on Luffy, and I…" Ace stopped, feeling his chest squeeze and tighten at the memory.

Shanks himself was in the same position. He thought it'd be too dangerous for Luffy out on the sea but hearing this…

"After thinking on it, when they were ready to kill him, I remember feeling so desperate and helpless that something inside me snapped. Everyone dropped but I wasn't paying attention because Lu needed me, and I think that's when I first unlocked it," he said slowly.

Shanks nodded to confirm, while wishing he could get his hand on those pathetic rats.

And hearing Ace tell him Bluejam went to kill him made his heart stutter. But that bandit, Dadan, he was going to have to thank personally one day for what she did. Saving Ace and throwing herself through the fire was incredible, she had his respects.

Ace breath hitched when he got to the part of the reunion, having explained how he and Dadan made it back, causing Shanks to never underestimate Ace's physical strength.

"Sabo had set sail already but the Tenryuubito were coming. Sabo was in their way and Dogra… Dogra had said… that they shot his ship down!" Ace screamed out, feeling the raw pain consume him once again.

He threw himself up onto his feet and paced up and down. Somehow Shanks could sense his fire just brimming underneath the surface, barely being restrained.

"They shot a twelve year old's ship down! He didn't deserve that! He just wanted to live! He… he was my brother and he, and he just wanted to live a free life… he just wanted to be free…" Ace rasped, dropping down onto his knees and clutching his hair, shaking.

"He, he left me a letter and it said… it said to take care of Luffy. But how could I? He was gone and I was the worst. Luffy needed Sabo, the nice brother… and it's all my fault. I was so stupid, so naive…"

"That was not your fault, Ace," Shanks cut in sharply. "It was those blasted Tenryuubito's fault and I know that because they shot down Sabo's ship not you."

Ace shook his head. "Luffy wanted to see him but I said he would be better off, back in that cage that had a proper home and plenty of books to read. And I just never even gave the thought about how much my brother wanted his freedom over any of that stuff…"

Shanks dropped down on his knees and grasped the back of Ace's neck tightly. "It wasn't your fault Ace, you were just a kid-" He was interrupted by Ace shaking his head, breaking their contact. He was met with red, glistening eyes.

"If I never existed he would still be here, because my stupidity would never have gotten in the way and-" This time he was interrupted by Shanks grabbing his chin and bringing him close, forcing him to meet his eyes.

"Because of you Sabo got to have his freedom! You gave your brother the freedom he so desperately wanted, no matter how short or long, you gave him that. And I know he treasured that, because you were his freedom. With you he felt free, and with that he gained a brother. You gave him so much that if you weren't here, he wouldn't have gotten it. Nor would Luffy have had such a great big brother."

Ace could feel something in his chest lighten. Did he.. Did he really give Sabo the freedom he wanted?

As if reading his mind Shanks nodded. "Ace, trust me. Even if Sabo was given just a small moment of freedom, knowing it would lead him back to a cage or death, it would still be worth it. Because he got to feel freedom, no matter how small or short, and that means everything. Do you understand now?"

Ace couldn't form words, just open and close his mouth like fish so he nodded. Because he did understand now.

Shanks smiled, feeling pleased with this. "Good, and always remember it, because it's the truth. I wouldn't lie to you."

Ace nodded again. Then he bowed low, nearly knocking his head against Shanks's nose on the way, and said, "Thank you. You've done so much for me and just, thank you."

A hand ruffled his hair. "Not a problem at all kid. Now, do you feel up to training? If not it's alright, I understand."

Ace shot up so fast that this time he did clock Shanks up the chin with his head. "No no! I want to train, really, I do. I.. I feel better. Not so empty, I guess," he said, lifting the corner of his mouth up. He needed to do something, he didn't want to return to his dark room.

Shanks felt his lips twitch. "Alright then. What I want for you is to summon that Conquerors Haki of yours and use it, against me." Now that got Ace to stare incredulously at him. "Say what now?!" he shrieked.

Shanks simply nodded. "You heard me, and there's something I want to try. Also don't worry I got a strong will, remember what I said about those with strong wills?" he questioned.

Ace frowned for a moment but nodded. Shanks could easily stand against whatever he threw at him. His mentor would be all right.

"Just let it out, but try to control it so it won't explode, in a sense. With no control you can damage your environment along with people around you," he notified.

Ace nodded albeit slowly. He could do this… maybe.

He just needed to call inside himself, to reach for that power. He inhaled deeply, drawing it out. Suddenly it flared up and he barely managed to grasp it until he felt something hit him.

It was like he standing in the ocean and the waves were crashing and roaring against him. Demanding for him to bow, to surrender himself. Ace somehow knew this was Shanks, that this was the power of Shanks doing. But yet it wasn't even the full power of the man, just a glimmer.

So Ace tested his waters and pushed back, demanding for that storm to part, to leave him. He called his haki to grow, to create its own storm to fight back. But it didn't feel right, like he should be making it do something else.

A thought struck him, making him unsure if he should follow through with it. But Shanks hadn't said anything so it should be ok, right?

He called his haki to create a wall of unyielding fire. To burn so hot and bright that it would make others run, to surrender. He could feel the fire grow and get stronger.

All of a sudden a blast of pure power from that storm he was fighting made him stumble back, feeling dazed. He could feel an arm catch him and pull him close. Distantly he could hear voices speaking above him but he couldn't focus.

He felt tired. So he closed his eyes and fell asleep, giving into the emptiness despite those voices calling to him.

As soon as Ace opened his eyes he felt… scared? No, that wasn't it…

Intimidated.

He had a flashback, remembering he and Shanks were basically pitting their haki against each other. The strong fire he had created and called to burn.

"Ace? Are you listening to me? You there?" a voice asked, breaking him out of his thoughts. He blinked to clear his vision and saw Shanks and Benn standing above him, faces concerned. He looked down and saw he was in a bed that was not his own.

Ace sat up and instantly put together that he was in Shanks's room. Though he had no reason why.

"Uh, what happened? Why am I in your bed?" he questioned, his eyebrow raised suspiciously. Benn sighed and threw a look at Shanks before facing the kid. "You and Shanks were using your Conqueror's Haki against each other. Except Shanks used a bigger burst of it," he explained.

"Only because I had to," Shanks quickly butted in, "you were letting your haki get too strong and while that's fine, it wasn't exactly in control y'see. You broke the crate we were sitting on and you were going to break something else so I had to stop you."

Ace frowned at him. "You couldn't have said something?"

Shanks shook his head. "You were kinda lost in the moment, a beginners thing that's all. Only way to snap you out of it was to hit you with a burst of haki. I am sorry about that," he apologized sincerely.

Ace raised a hand and waved it off. "No it's ok, I guess. I mean, I was losing my control so it's understandable." He looked at the window in the room to be greeted by bright streams of sunlight. "How long was I out?" he asked.

Shanks and Benn shared a look. "All morning," they answered in unison.

Ace widened his eyes. "Seriously? How strong did you hit me Shanks?"

Shanks rolled his eyes and said, "You were 'knocked out' yes, but you were already tired beforehand, exhausted really. Seems like you haven't been sleeping well, have you?" he ended up asking.

The fire-user stiffened a little. He was about to lie but the looks Shanks and Benn gave him made him think otherwise. "No, I haven't. Is that an issue?" he retorted a bit testily, not feeling up to another talk. He seriously couldn't handle another.

Both elder pirates raised their eyebrows but shook their heads. "No, it's fine. Just wanted to know if you're ok. If that's that then I'll take my leave." With that Benn got up and immediately Ace felt guilty. But before he could apologize the gunslinger was already out of the door.

He let out a groan and dropped his face into his hands. The bed then dipped down with the added weight of Shanks. "I know I know, I was being a jerk," he grumbled.

A snort. "Nah you're just being a bit crabby."

Ace looked at the one armed man with narrowed eyes. "Don't you think I know? I want to apologize but I don't want to make him feel like he has to forgive me, I'll wait til later, just in case."

Shanks raised an eyebrow at the tone. Once again Ace groaned and slapped a palm to his forehead. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap," he muttered, a little self-bitterness in his voice.

Shanks shrugged, waving a hand. "It's fine, just tell me what's wrong. You feel sick or something?" he asked, genuinely curious. Ace slowly bobbed his head up and down, not looking at him fully in the eye. "I guess you can say that," he mumbled.

Instantly Shanks could tell something was off, the kid looked like he was hiding something. "Ace, there's something you aren't telling me," he said carefully.

He knew he was right when the kid flinched and turned his head slightly away from him.

"Fess up kid, what're you hiding? Is it something serious? Are you feeling ill?" he pushed, not liking the thought of Ace feeling unwell and hiding it from him.

The kid finally looked at him and bit his lip, unsure. "No I'm not exactly ill, really," he stressed. The look of unamusement Shanks gave made him swallow a tight lump. He didn't think this would ever become an issue.

He sighed. "I haven't been eating as much as I should," he confessed.

He wasn't prepared for the intense worried look that formed on the older captain's face, which made him feel even more guilty.

"Ace, you need to eat. Why haven't you been eating properly? Are you sick?" Ace swatted away the hand that came to touch his forehead and huffed. "I would be if there was enough food," he mumbled.

Apparently Shanks heard that for he narrowed his eyes. "Is your supply of food low? I told you Ace that you and your crew are more than welcomed to eat with us!"

The teen shook his head. "No that isn't the problem. The problem is… my stomach."

Shanks was losing his patience but he stayed calm. He pressed a hand against the kid's stomach and gently prodded at it, noting that the skin looked blemished and hugged Ace's body a bit more than it should be.

"Kid, tell me honestly I won't judge, but, have you been starving yourself?" he asked, making sure he sounded calm and gentle.

Ace looked at him horrified. "What- no! No, Shanks, I haven't been starving myself. Technically," he muttered under his breath.

That seemed to be the last straw for Shanks for he got up and plopped himself right in front of Ace. "Listen here kid, you're telling me what's wrong now, or we're going to the nurses to get an answer, got it?" he ordered.

Ace blinked, suddenly feeling like a small child in trouble. Since when did Shanks act like… this?

At the growing impatience from the redhead he was receiving he decided to drop the bombshell.

"I have this big appetite, really big you see and well, if I ate what I need to there wouldn't be enough food left for my crew. So I eat what a normal amount is for others and make up for it whenever we land on an island. By hunting or dine and dashing, or both," he confessed.

Silence. It was silent for a while after he said that. And it was making him really nervous.

"So," Shanks started slowly, "you have a big appetite. And instead of thinking of telling me, who could help you out, or trying to come up with a plan, you decide to let yourself starve."

Ace winced. Great, he just made the Yonko angry. He mustered up the courage to look at him and it took his whole willpower to not cower away. "I was going to think of something, eventually. But my appetite is really big! It's hard to satisfy it," he defended himself weakly, feeling his eyes water in embarrassment.

Shanks didn't miss it and sighed, feeling a bit bad. "Kid, I'm not angry. Well, I'm angry you didn't tell me. I worry about you and being your mentor is more than training you, it's also taking care of you. And I haven't been since you've clearly lost some weight and feel exhausted."

Now that doubled the guilt. Ace shook his head, trying to get through to the Yonko that it wasn't his fault but his own.

"Please don't blame yourself Shanks, I'm sorry. I didn't want to bother you-" He stopped talking as soon as Shanks aimed a glare at him.

"You didn't want to bother me? You kidding me Ace? You don't bother me! I want to help you! In fact it's more of me bothering you, with my hovering and all that," he huffed, flicking Ace on the nose.

The kid looked down, wrapping his arms around his mid-section. "I'm really sorry Shanks, I didn't think it'd get this bad," he mumbled under his breath.

Shanks gave him a blank stare. "Didn't think starving yourself wouldn't affect you?" he deadpanned, making Ace wince. "I'm serious! I was going to plan something, but it just eventually slipped my mind."

That was a bad thing to say for Shanks glared again. "Ace- you!" the man groaned and dropped his face into his palm, as if giving up.

"Kid," he said, voice strained, "you endangered yourself. I don't care how much you eat, getting you fed and taken care of is all that matters to me." He raised his head and looked Ace in the eyes, getting his full attention.

"I get you're fiercely independent, but since you're sailing with me, you need to communicate with me on certain matters. I'm not expecting for you to tell me every little detail but when it comes down to health, whether physical or mental, I need to know these things. Do you understand?" he questioned, voice dead serious.

Ace nodded, still feeling small. "I understand. And I'm really sorry Shanks, it won't happen again."

He was gifted with a grimacing smile. "I hope so, kid. NOw you're going to hate this, but we still need to see the nurses. I want to know how much weight you've lost and get a plan going to get you back on track, got it?" he asked once more. He was pleased when he received a nod.

"Thank you, now let's go do it before dinner starts."

Benn didn't have to turn around to know it was Ace walking up behind him.

"What're you doing up so late?" he questioned, not angrily but genuine curiosity. Ace didn't say anything but walked up to him.

"Shanks told me you had night watch and uh, I wanted to apologize for being rude earlier."

Now that had Benn raising his eyebrows in surprise. He knew Ace was polite but it was still a little surprising. He looked at the kid and smiled kindly, which surprised Ace now.

"No worries kid, I'm not mad for you being a little testy. All is good," he assured. Ace eyed him warily before realizing he was telling the truth. "Oh, well I'm glad," he said blankly.

Benn chuckled and shook his head. He stayed silent, knowing Ace was about to say something from the way he kept fidgeting. But when the kid wasn't saying anything he decided to help out. "Got something on your mind?" he asked.

Ace flinched but nodded. "Shanks suggested I tell you, but uh, I was upset because I was… hungry."

Benn blinked. Was the kid trying to pull his leg? But the way the fire-user held himself told him otherwise. "You were hungry?" he repeated.

Ace grumbled under his breath, something about 'stupid Shanks', before slumping. "I'm telling you this because I trust you, and it might be important. But don't tell anyone else! I'll do that when I'm ready."

Benn nodded. "I won't tell, promise." If his captain knew then it shouldn't be too bad.

But after what Ace just told him it was that bad. He groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Ace…" he grumbled, feeling himself ready to lecture the kid. But was stopped by Ace 'punching' his fist against his arm.

"Don't need to lecture me, Shanks took care of that," he admitted, his cheeks burning red. For a moment Benn felt bad for the kid, no doubt he was embarrassed, but he did deserve it after what he hid from them.

So he smiled lightly and wrapped an arm around the kid, steering him away from the railing. "Where are we going? Don't you have nightwatch?" the teen asked.

Benn shrugged. "My shift is over in about five minutes. Thought we could raid the kitchen, feeling a bit hungry." He threw a wink at the befuddled kid. "A secret between us though, 'kay? Shanks'll throw a hissy fit if he finds out we raided it without him."

Ace, for a moment, couldn't say anything, just feeling a pleasing warmth seep through his chest. But then he recovered and grinned. "Don't worry my lips are sealed."

Benn ruffled his hair and chuckled.