Thank you Simplymondler and Guest for your reviews! I am in fact cooking up another story as the idea hit me last night like a lightning bolt ;) You'll see it come up eventually.

A Couple of Weeks Later

"I don't get it, man," Joey said. "Why didn't you tell her?"

"Because she was crying and not making any sense," Ross said. His mind was still on fire from their conversation.

"Rach, you okay?" he had asked her, seeing her sitting on the curb outside of a doctor's office.

"No!" she had shouted. "I'm not okay. I am NOT okay. I'm never going to be okay again!"

"Why don't you just start by telling me what's not okay?" Ross had suggested.

"I'm pregnant," Rachel had blurted out. He had stared at her. She had begged him to keep it a secret for a while longer, that no one knew.

Rachel was pregnant. Pregnant. Expecting a baby. Rachel was having a baby. This kept going through Ross's mind over and over again like a batting cage where the word pregnant was the baseball and he was smacking it away only to have it come back full force again.

"So, what, you're just never going to tell her?" Joey asked, cutting into his thoughts. Ross looked at him sharply.

"No, I don't think so. Can we drop this please?" Ross asked. Paolo was the father. Rachel had been certain of that. She wasn't going to tell him. She was doing it on her own. Ross felt like he wanted to do the right thing by her, but he couldn't imagine himself ever looking at the child without thinking about Paolo, and that wasn't fair to Rachel. He was beginning to think she didn't need to know how he felt. He'd just be the friend she needed during this difficult time.

"I'm seeing Sidney again," Joey said. "You know, the peeper girl?"

"Huh?" Ross asked.

"God, Ross, I listen to all your dinosaur crap," Joey said angrily. "Can't you listen to me for once?"

"Sorry. Something about Sidney," Ross said.

"Ugh, really?" Phoebe said, coming into the cafe. She dropped into the armchair heavily.

"Yes, really," Joey said, frowning. "She was super hot, and she likes pizza. Oh, and meatball subs! Oh, and Die Hard!" Joey got more excited as the list grew of how many things in common he had with Sidney.

"So, Phoebs," Ross said, growing irritated by this. "What's going on with you?"

"Well, you know I started teaching my clients to do work at home massages right? Yea, they're doing it. I don't have a job currently," Phoebe said. She was doing her best to not think about Joey and Sidney in his apartment watching Die Hard and eating meatball pizzas together.

"Chandler could help you out there," Ross suggested.

"Chandler could what now?" Chandler asked, overhearing this as he joined them.

"Help Phoebe get a job at your office."

"Oohhhh. Well, that includes being normal for eight hours a day," Chandler joked.

"I can do that," Phoebe said seriously. She watched as Joey was looking at the ceiling and ticking his fingers off like he was counting something.

"What are you doing?" Chandler asked him.

"Making a list of all the things Sidney and I have in common," Joey said. "It's a lot!"

"Great, so, back to me," Phoebe said quickly. "What's the job?"

"Answering a phone and doing administration work," Chandler said.

"I'm a good administrator," Phoebe said, nodding. "I can do it."

"All right. Well, I'll see you tomorrow then," Chandler said. Phoebe stared at him for a moment.

"I mean, after today. I'll see you tomorrow after this moment right now," Chandler explained.

"Hey, you guys," Rachel said coming in too. She was starting her shift. Ross avoided her glance. Rachel noticed this and felt a pang of regret for spilling her guts to him that day.

"Hey, Rach, coffee?" Chandler asked. She nodded, going to get it. "Where's Mon anyway?"

"Out with Ethan," Ross said absently. He chose this time to pull out his beeper and examine it.

"Ethan? As in, young Ethan?" Joey asked.

"Yea. They seem to be hitting it off," Ross replied.

"Oh," Chandler said. He felt a pang of jealousy. A young man, eh? He tried not to picture what they'd be doing right now.

"Here," Rachel said, passing him his coffee.

"So what's that?" Chandler asked Ross, gesturing to the beeper. Anything to get his mind off of Monica.

"It's for when Carol has the baby," Ross explained. Rachel clattered the dishes in her hand at the word "baby." Joey briefly looked at her, concerned, but turned back to Ross.

"Very cool," Chandler replied. "So that's any day now?"

"Yup. Very soon," Ross nodded. Rachel dropped utensils on the floor next.

"Do you need help?" Phoebe asked. Then it hit her. "Hey! I could be a waitress!"

"No, no, Phoebs. I'm okay," Rachel said. "I've just got...um...weak wrists today."

"Well, I'm off to meet Sidney," Joey said, getting up. Phoebe looked at him longingly. Rachel caught this, and she met Phoebe's eyes for a quick second afterward before Phoebe looked away fast.

"I have to get back to work," Ross said. Rachel wanted to call out for him to stay a moment, but he stealthily avoided her before going out the door.

"I have to...well, I don't have to do anything," Chandler said. "But I feel I should be doing something since you all are." He got up and left too. Phoebe was the last one sitting.

"Everything okay?" Rachel asked her.

"Oh yea," Phoebe said.

"You looked a little sad when Joey mentioned his date," Rachel prodded. She wasn't entirely stupid. Well, she might be, but she refused to acknowledge the little person inside of her as something that was created because of her stupidity.

"I feel sorry for her," Phoebe lied. "He'll just dump her like he does everyone else."

"Maybe, maybe not," Rachel said.

"Fine, take his side!" Phoebe shouted, getting up and storming out. Rachel was left standing there holding her t-towel wondering what just happened.

The Next Day

"It was Ross," Phoebe said, hanging up the phone. It was her first day, and she felt she was doing well.

"Nice work," Chandler said, going back to his doodling. He noticed she was still sitting there. "Anything else I can help you with?"

"Not really. Oh, um, how was Joey's date last night?" Phoebe asked.

"It was..."

"Wait! Don't tell me!" Phoebe cried, changing her mind.

"All right," Chandler said.

"Well, give me something," Phoebe said again, her attitude changing. Chandler stared at her.

"Are you sure? Or are you going to go all kung fu on my ass when I tell you?" he asked.

"Tell me. No, don't. Yes, do. Oh God!" Phoebe cried, banging her fist onto his desk. "This is so hard!"

"What is?"

"Nothing! Absolutely nothing," Phoebe said, getting up.

"Do you like Joey?" Chandler asked, picking up on something.

"N-no. Of course not! That's so stupid," Phoebe prattled. She went out the door, slamming it behind her. Chandler jumped at the sound. If he didn't know any better, he believed Phoebe had a thing for Joey.

No different than secretly pining for Monica, his voice told him.

"Ah shut up," he muttered to himself.

Monica & Rachel

"I think I'm going crazy!" Monica yelped. She had forgotten what she was even cooking, and that was so unlike her. She was flying around the apartment cleaning like mad while Rachel was sitting on the couch with a magazine.

"Why are you suddenly so...oh," Rachel said, putting it together. "Are you gonna...?"

"I don't know," Monica responded quickly. "Who knows anything?"

"Have you shaved your legs?" Rachel asked, looking over her magazine at her.

"Well...yea," Monica caved.

"Then you know something," Rachel winked.

"It's a precaution!" Monica said defensively. Rachel just laughed and shook her head at her friend. She wished it was her going on a date. With this baby, she wouldn't be dating for a very long time.

"Are you all right, sweetie?" Monica asked, noticing Rachel's sudden subdued mood.

"I may have told Ross something that freaked him out," Rachel said absently.

"Like what?" Monica asked, coming over to sit beside her.

"I promise I'll tell you after your date," Rachel said.

"But I want to know now! You can't leave me hang-..." Monica was cut off by the ding of her oven. "Oh God! It's time. He'll be here any second!"

"You'll be great, Mon," Rachel said, patting her friend's leg. "I'll just be down at Central Perk."

"Oh, wait! You had something to tell me," Monica remembered, frowning.

"I said I'd tell you after your date," Rachel reiterated. "Have fun. I'll see you later." She snagged her purse on the way out the door. She ran into Ethan in the hallway. He looked just as much of a nervous wreck as Monica did. She smiled to herself as she went down the stairs. Those kind of dates were something she was going to really miss.

"Hey, Chandler," she said, bumping into him.

"Hi. Where are you off to?" he asked.

"Just getting out of the apartment. Ethan's arriving," Rachel said, emphasizing his name.

"Really? I gotta get a look at this guy," Chandler said, bolting up the stairs. Rachel stared after him. She wondered why he cared so much. She finally got to the cafe with her magazine when Ross came in. He didn't notice her right away, and she was unsure of what to even say to him that wouldn't make him bolt like a deer. He grabbed his coffee and stopped in his tracks when he saw her sitting there watching him.

"Hey," he said.

"Hi," she replied. There was an awkward silence.

"I'll see you later," he said finally.

"Wait! Ross, I need to talk to you," Rachel said. He turned to look at her. "Please? Just sit." He looked conflicted before sighing and coming to the couch and sitting beside her.

"Look," she started. "I know I freaked you out the other day. I'm sorry for that. I was just so...scared, and I didn't know what I was going to do. I still don't! But I want you to know that I'm going to tell Monica tonight after her date. It won't be a secret anymore."

"Okay," Ross nodded. "That's good."

"Can we still be friends?" she asked.

"Why wouldn't we be?" he asked back.

"Well, I know you wanted to take me on a date cos you mentioned that a few months ago, and I know we never got that chance to, so I thought maybe you still wanted that," Rachel went on.

"I moved on from that when you started dating other people," Ross lied. Rachel looked disappointed, but he couldn't bear to tell her the truth.

"I see," she said. "Well, then that's cleared up. Um, well, then I guess we're done here." She smiled weakly at him.

"I'll be your friend in this and help you with whatever you need, okay? I promise," Ross said, reaching for her hand and squeezing it.

"Thanks, Ross," she whispered. He felt bad for lying to her. He wondered if she could see that. Suddenly, his beeper went off.

"Oh my God!" he shouted. "Oh, oh, oh! It's baby time!" He jumped up. Rachel stood up quickly with him.

"Call the number, call the number, call the number!" she chanted, smacking his arm. He leapt over the coffee table and ran for the phone. Rachel stood watching, feeling anxious. This was going to be her in the future. Ross came back looking annoyed.

"What's wrong?" Rachel asked.

"Someone calling for Andre and his services again," he snorted. "Do I look like an Andre to you?"

"Not really," she said, smirking.

"Oh, thanks," Ross replied sarcastically. "Well, I'm gonna get going. You need anything?"

"Nope. Got my magazine," Rachel said, showing him. "Have a good night, Ross." He smiled and waved, leaving her sitting there feeling sad and alone.

Chandler & Joey

"What's with the long face? I got the Joey special tonight," Joey said, holding up the two pizzas. "I taped Baywatch earlier, so we're all set!" He went over to sit in his chair and reached for a beer that was in the ice bucket beside it.

"Just a long day at work," Chandler said. He was bummed about Ethan. He had managed to get a peek at the guy just before Monica let him in, and he couldn't help but notice how flushed and happy Monica looked. Tonight was probably sex night. He really needed to let this crush go. Honestly, it wouldn't work out. Look at what happened to his last roommate! The guy had to leave altogether when he and Monica broke up. Chandler knew he should heed this. She probably didn't feel the same way anyway.

"Dude, come on," Joey said. Chandler reluctantly sat down after grabbing a slice and a beer.

"Hey you guys," Phoebe said coming into the apartment. "Ugh, Baywatch? Really?"

"Hey, we don't mock what you watch," Joey retorted. Then he got thinking. "What do you watch?"

"True crime," Phoebe replied. "I like seeing the criminals get taken down by the cops."

"Ah," Joey said, not getting it. "So, how was your first day?" He figured changing the subject would help the situation.

"It was great! Everyone was super nice," she replied.

"Pays to know the bossman," Chandler bragged, leaning back in his chair with his arms behind his head and a grin on his face.

"I didn't say I knew you," Phoebe explained.

"W-what? Why not?"

"Cos nobody likes you," she said logically.

"Say that again?" Chandler asked, sitting up straight.

"Nobody likes you," she repeated.

"Why?"

"Cos you're the boss," she told him. "Duh."

"That's ridiculous!" Chandler argued.

"They used to like you, if that helps," Phoebe said.

"No! It doesn't! I can't believe this!"

"They even do you," Phoebe went on.

"What does that mean?"

"You know, like, 'Could that coffee BE any worse?'" she mimicked.

"I don't sound like that," Chandler disagreed.

"Yea, yea!" Joey said, getting excited. "'That is so NOT fair.'"

"Shut up!" Chandler shouted. Phoebe and Joey were busting with laughter now. He glowered at them.

"Sorry, man," Joey said after he stopped laughing. "It's true though." Chandler ignored him.

"Well, I'm going to go do something quirky," Phoebe said. They both looked at her, curious. "What? I can't do eight hours of normal without being quirky at the end of the day. It'll seep out at the wrong time." She left them there, both looking at each other confused.

The Next Day

"MON!" they all shouted at the same time. Monica pulled out her earbuds.

"What?" she asked.

"Ethan called," Rachel said.

"That's nice," Monica said, continuing on to her room. Rachel was worried. Monica had seemed to upset that her plan of telling her about the baby went out the window.

"What happened? He turned into a pumpkin at midnight?" Chandler joked.

"You guys break up?" Ross asked her. She paused.

"Things just don't work out," she replied. She hoped that was enough of an answer for them, but she knew her friends better than that.

"Is it cos he needed a hall pass to use the bathroom at school?" Chandler teased.

"Oh ha ha ha you're so hilarious!" Monica said, faking amusement. "Yes, my life is so amusing. Drop it." She slammed her bedroom door behind her. They all looked at each other.

"I wonder what happened?" Ross asked. Rachel knew, but she wasn't going to give them anymore ammunition.

"Well, I'm off," Phoebe said, standing up. "Big party tonight."

"Where?" Chandler demanded.

"At work. Oh! You should come and show them how cool you are," she suggested. He stood up with her.

"You really think so?"

"Worth a try," Phoebe shrugged. "But don't come with me. I don't want them to hate me for bringing Mr. Bossman." She started to leave.

"Wait up!" Joey called. "I gotta go meet Sidney. Thought we could share a cab." Phoebe looked briefly annoyed at this, both Chandler and Rachel noticed.

"I have to go help Carol, so I'll see you guys later," Ross said, leaving as well.

"You think there's something going on with Phoebe?" Rachel asked Chandler casually. He looked at her.

"You see it too?"

"Yea! It's so weird. It's like she's mad at Joey or something," Rachel said, twisting the truth to see if Chandler corrected her.

"I think she likes Joey," Chandler said. Bingo! Rachel thought.

"You think?"

"Yea. It's like every time he mentions a girl or a date she gets all weird and rambley," Chandler said.

"Should we confront her?" Rachel asked.

"Naw. It'd only make her upset. I say we leave it," Chandler added.

"What if they're meant to be together?" Rachel asked. "What if by ignoring it we're ruining their future together?"

"Um, Rach? I think you're taking it too far. It's Joey, remember? He doesn't think long-term. It's probably for the best he doesn't know. We don't need another person leaving the group because they broke up," he said.

"Another person leaving the group?" Rachel asked.

"Whoa! Would you look at the time? I have a party to go to," Chandler said, looking at his watch in fake astonishment. Rachel rolled her eyes and went into her bedroom. Once her door closed, Chandler hovered outside of Monica's. He knocked softly.

"What? Come to make some more jokes?" Monica asked when she opened it.

"No. Actually, I was wondering if you wanted to go to a party with me tonight? To get your mind off Ethan," Chandler added quickly.

"Really?" she asked.

"Yea. Thought it might help you feel better to watch me make an ass out of myself in front of my employees," Chandler said, shrugging.

"That could make me feel better," Monica agreed. "I'll be right out." He did a little victory dance when she closed the door. Tonight wouldn't suck too much after all.

The Next Day

"It's not fair," Chandler said after Phoebe explained he could never be friends with his employees. His eyes followed Monica when she came into the apartment looking indifferent. She had had fun last night, he knew she did, but she had gone right back to sad once it was over.

"Mon? Everything okay?" Rachel asked.

"Yea. Told Ethan why we couldn't be together," Monica said. She gave a shudder suddenly.

"It's for the best," Rachel agreed.

"Hey, you had something to tell me," Monica remembered. Rachel froze. The others were looking at her expectantly.

"It was kind of a you and me thing," Rachel said.

"Oh. Okay, well," Monica said, looking at Phoebe and Chandler. "Get out!" They jumped at her voice.

"What?" Chandler asked.

"Out, out, out!" Monica shouted, shooing them. Rachel covered her face to hide her laughter at their expressions.

"That was SO weird," Chandler said in the hallway.

"Tell me about it," Phoebe agreed.

"Coffee?" he asked.

"Sure." They went down to the Perk together.

"Okay. Now you can tell me," Monica said. She sat down and got comfortable.

"Oh, gosh. I don't know if I can..."

"Dammit Rachel! Just tell me!"

"All right, all right!" Rachel said, indignant. "Mon, I'm having a..."

"Baby!" Ross shouted, bursting out of the bathroom door and making them both jump in fright. "I'm having a baby! Oh my God!" Monica leaped to her feet.

"Seriously?!" she asked.

"Kind of stealing my thunder here, Ross," Rachel muttered. Monica didn't hear her. All she heard was "baby" in her mind.

"I gotta...I'm gonna...oh wow," Ross said, collapsing to his knees.

"Ross!" Monica cried, pulling him up. "Focus! You're having a baby! Get moving!" He scrambled to keep his balance and then bolted out the door.

"Oh my God! I'm going to be an aunt," Monica said, starting to cry.

"Yes, that's great," Rachel said. She stood up wearily. She automatically reached for her abdomen, making Monica's eyes widen in shock.

"Y-you? You're...?" she could say it.

"Yea, Mon, I'm having a baby too," Rachel said.

"WHAT?! Why didn't you tell me sooner?!" Monica yelled. "Oh my God! Phoebe was right!"

"I was scared. Look, we have to be there for Ross. We can deal with me later. I'm just barely two months along," Rachel said, waving her hand dismissively. "Wait...what? Phoebe was right?"

"She said something about your doubled aura. I don't know," Monica dismissed. "Once this is over, though, you and I are having a big chat." She ran to grab her things before joining Ross. Rachel felt a little relieved that two of her friends knew about the baby. She felt less alone.