Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and am making no money from this.

Hermione

I've finally gotten a reply back from the Minister of Magic. Actually, I got it this morning, but this isn't the sort of thing I wanted to read with an audience; too many questions from Harry and Ron. This isn't about them, and at this point I prefer to keep it that way.

I've waited until night time, when most everyone should be studying or doing school work. Of course most people in the tower are wasting time, but at the very least they're otherwise occupied, and since few like talking to me, this is a fine time to see what the Minister had to say.

I open the envelope and am just taking the letter out when Ginny plops down next to me.

"Hiya," she greets. "What you reading?"

"Um, nothing. It's just a personal thing."

"Hmm. Don't think I'm buying that one, Hermione."

"What? What do you mean?"

"I saw you get it at breakfast and then put it away real fast."

"What, you've been watching me all day, waiting for me to open it?" I give Ginny a suspicious look.

"Pretty much. So what is it?"

"It's from the Minister of Magic, if you must know." Ginny knew I mailed the Minister already, and even if she didn't, she's not the sort to let things go, especially if she's been watching and waiting all day.

"Oh, that Parkinson Manor stuff?"

"Yes. And I'd prefer if you keep your voice down. I don't care to let others know."

"What? Why not?"

"For Pansy because I want it to be a surprise if it works, and if it doesn't, I don't want to have gotten her hopes up. For everyone else, it's none of their business," I answer. Pansy is thankfully at a table, reading some book, waving her wand practicing a spell.

"So what'd he say?"

I open the letter and start looking at it. "Dear Miss Granger… always a pleasure to hear from one of our most distinguished citizens… I appreciate your interest in this topic… while you do make a compelling argument I'm afraid it is not in keeping with our current laws. Blah, blah, blah, we're a nation of laws… thank you for writing… please don't hesitate to do so again in the future… sincerely, the stand-in windbag."

"You really expected something else? I told you he wasn't going to buy it."

"I know, and I assumed you were right, but a part of me expected better."

"Better?" Ginny asks.

"That he'd see that denying Pansy the manor is wrong, that he'd have some plan or path forward ready. Instead I get the magical equivalent of a form letter."

"What's a form letter?"

"Oh, sorry, I guess wizards don't have that? It's a generic letter prewritten that's used in response to mail that does not warrant a personal response. It's meant to make the letter writer feel like they're important, but in reality is impersonal and almost insulting."

"Well if it makes you feel better usually you'd get no response at all. The fact you did means you're important."

"Yes, I know, we're important, at least for the moment."

"Well, sorry it didn't work out. I guess you had to try though, right?"

"Oh no, I'm not done," I assure Ginny.

"Hmm? What's left? You tried and he said no."

"I tried asking nicely. Next I won't be nice about it. He's the interim minister only, remember. He wants to be permanent, but he has to win an election first, and in an election the opinions and endorsements of heroes carry weight."

"Um, you want to start playing politics? Aren't you a bit young for that?"

"I don't want to, but as it's the only way to get what I want, I will do so. And I'm old enough to recognize that I have leverage, so I'll use it."

"You really need to be careful here, I think," Ginny cautions. "People do this for a living. Now I know you're really smart, maybe smarter than that Minister, sure. But he's got experience on you, Hermione."

"I know, and I'll be careful. For now, all I'm going to do is remind him that in an election, especially in a time when the population is nervous, that the endorsement from a hero can swing votes, either for or against him. I won't threaten, I'll simply say that this is the right thing to do, and if the laws say otherwise then he should do what it takes to change them, and depending on what he does or doesn't do, I'll do what is right as well."

"Isn't that sort of corruption or something?"

"From what I understand it's how politics works. It may not be pure, but if it gets things done I'm willing to live with the somewhat gray morality of it."

"Um, if you say so." Ginny might not agree, but if she was in love I think her point of view might change. Regardless, pushing the point won't help.

"Actually, there is something else I'd like to talk to you about."

"What's that?"

"I was hoping you might talk with Pansy."

"Uh, talk to her about what?" Ginny gives me an unsure look.

"Anything. It's just that you're one of my best female friends; I've been able to talk to you about things I couldn't talk to Harry or Ron about, and it's awkward now that you and Pansy dislike each other. I've noticed you only talk to me when Pansy isn't around. It's not a good situation for me, Ginny. I've talked to Pansy, she said she'll be um, civilized, no mind games or anything like that. So please, just talk to her. About anything at all. Just talk."

"Just talk to her? Hermione, she's not nice. Evil. Hateful, even."

"So talk to her about evil things, what you hate, what annoys you, whatever pops into your head. I know it's awkward, but please, just try? For me?"

"Fine," Ginny groans.

Hardly the most enthusiastic response, but I suppose if it's like the Minister, all will be well that ends well.

Pansy

I've just about got this spell down when someone sits down next to me. I look up, about to tell them to fuck off when I see it's the girl weasel. Not that I like her, but Hermione made me agree to talk to her, so I swallow the insult in my mouth.

"So um, yeah. Hermione said we should talk?" the girl tries as a conversation starter.

"So talk."

She gives me this annoyed look. It's almost funny. "Um, what, uh, what are you reading? Some spell book?"

"Portkeys."

"Portkeys? I didn't know they taught those here."

"They don't; I'm teaching myself."

"Oh, that's um, nice," she responds lamely.

The girl's flailing around here pretty bad. I should poke at her more, really enjoy her suffering here. Instead I have to throw her a life line. This is what I get for promising to be nice.

"So did Hermione suggest what you should talk about, or did she just send you over here with nothing?" I ask.

"She said I should talk about things that I hate or annoy me."

"Fine, so what pisses you off?"

"What, you want to just hear me ranting?"

"Why the hell not." I shrug. This better be good or Hermione's going to owe me big.

She looks at me for a bit, like she thinks this is a trap or something. Apparently she decides it's not. "All right, you know what pisses me off? Fleur Delacour."

"Fleur? Why?"

"Have you seen her? She all up and prances around in that tiny outfit of hers. I mean, who is she trying to fool? I was here when all the Beauxbatons girls were here. Their uniforms didn't look like that. They actually covered things. Their skirts weren't stupid short. There wasn't any cleavage shown at all. And they didn't wear heels like that."

"Her outfit's a problem?"

"Absolutely it is. Have you see how everyone stares? It's like she thrives on it, just struts all around the school just so she can watch everyone gawk and drool. Merlin, it's like the idiot boys don't know there's other girls around, and she loves every second of it, you can see it, this haughty grin she always has. She knows exactly what she's doing, and she loves it."

"Every school has an alpha girl."

"Oh, you mean Cho, who all of a sudden has decided to act like she's Merlin's gift to the world?

"Yeah, I suppose she does qualify," I agree.

"Yeah, because that's what Hogwarts needed? Some tart prancing around like Merlin's gift. I mean really, what is she trying to prove going around dressed like that? What, that's she a harlot? She could just say so and we'd believe her. Instead she just goes around half naked. Seriously, what is the doing, advertising? Last I saw she had a boyfriend. So why's she acting like she hocking something that's not supposed to be for sale? Or maybe she's just a big tease. All some stupid ego trip for the most stuck up girl in the school. Oh, look at me, I've got big boobs and long legs! Everyone stare at me! I even got the Boy Who Lived as my pet. But that's all you get to do because I'm too good for any of you.

"Not like she treats Harry well, just spending all his uncle's money like that. Seriously, thirty or forty, even fifty galleons on a pair of shoes? Come on, I don't care how good they look, there's no way to justify that. But I suppose if you're just some big free loader it's fine, right? And then when she gets called on it it's like she doesn't care, she's too busy checking if she actually got caught for it all or not.

"Oh, and did you see her at the DA? She wants to beat people up now? Be some kind of super oriental fighter or something? Come on, talk about living down to the worst clichés. Not that she's any good at it. Really, did you see? She practically fell on her butt. Probably just learning so she can do a few high kicks and flash her panties at people. Well, assuming she has any. You never know."

God, this girl can bitch with the best of them; it's hilarious. "Just a little bit bitter there, eh?"

"Bitter? Just what do you think that I'm bitter about? What, that Fleur and Cho have better figures than me? They're years older than me, of course they do. Let's see them at my age? I bet I'd do just fine. Or that they're going around flaunting like little tramps? Yeah, a bit annoying, but hey, their lives, if they don't want any self respect, fine. It'd be nice if every idiot boy in school wasn't staring at them constantly though.

"Or maybe how Cho has Harry as her boyfriend and doesn't seem to care? Takes him for granted? Treats him terribly? Acts like he's nothing special? Yeah, maybe a little. Maybe I do think she's acting like she doesn't deserve him."

"What, you had a crush on Potter or something?" I ask.

"So what if I did? It's not like he chose me, or even looked at me. But if he had you wouldn't see me taking him for granted or stealing money from his relatives or advertising to the whole bloody school like that. If you're in a relationship you should be in a relationship, not say you are then show off like you're in the market."

So the girl weasel has a crush on Potter eh. Pretty long standing one sounds like too. And he didn't notice her at all. Hmm, not sure why, she's younger but she's got a decent chest, you'd think a guy would notice. Must be some fucked up family thing between Potter and the weasels.

"So what are you going to do about it?"

"Do about it?" It's the first thing she's said in a while that isn't part of a long rant.

"Yeah, do about it. You think Cho doesn't deserve him and that you obviously do, so what are you going to do? Just bitch to me, or are you going to actually make a plan to get what you want?"

"A Slytherin like you would think of something like that. You can't just make some evil scheme to fall in love."

"Actually, you can," I point out with a smirk.

"All right, fine, maybe you did. Not that any of us knows what happened or why Hermione is still with you."

"She's with me because she loves me."

"Yeah, so you two say." The girl weasel doesn't sound convinced. Oh well, her opinion doesn't matter.

"Believe it or not, the point is, it can work. So are you going to just keep staring at Cho and being bitter, or are you going to do something?" It's funny, the girl bitches about half the school staring at Cho, and I'm willing to be she does as much staring as anyone. It may be bitter and jealous rather than lust filled, but it's still staring.

"I'm not going to plot to steal Harry or fight Cho for him or whatever sort of weird things you Slytherin did. Hermione told me some of that stuff. It's twisted, and I'm not going to do it. You might not be bad to vent to, but I'll pass on relationship advice from you, thanks."

So that's the end of my little talk with the girl weasel. Actually it was pretty amusing; the girl can really bitch and rant with the best of them, it's funny. Even funnier is that no matter how much she denies it, I know she'll be thinking about how to steal Potter for herself. Not that I expect it to work; Potter would have to be an idiot to break up with a girl like Cho. Still, could be fun to see the girl weasel try. Best would be if she did fight Cho; God help her if she did that. But I don't think she's that dumb. No, that won't happen. But she'll think about what to do, and I'm sure she'll be back to vent more and try to get my advice on what she can do while trying her hardest to make sure she looks like she isn't doing exactly that.

All in all, Hermione was right; the girl weasel isn't totally bad after all.

Fleur

Sadly, you can't get a subscription to any French newspapers in this castle, just the local British ones. I've seen students here reading a few of them, so I looked to see if any were worth reading. That Quibbler one was good for a cheap laugh, but even that lasted only a few minutes. The official paper is marginally better, though it's supposedly been a heavy government propaganda outlet at times. Still, it's better than nothing, so I read the Prophet.

I pick it up and start to read the front page. Unfortunately, many people here get the paper, and one of them seems to feel the need to read aloud from it.

"Extensive battles between Death Eaters and the so called Order of the Phoenix continue all across Britain. Neither side seems able to achieve a decisive advantage over the over, and civilians are increasingly caught in the crossfire. Ministry Aurors respond to each outbreak, but so far both groups have been quick to flee at the first sign of a Ministry response, leaving only the Dark Mark in the sky or the burning (and as of yet nameless) phoenix design on the ground." Hermione reads from the paper. English may not be my first language, but I am perfectly capable of reading a newspaper without her having to do it for me.

"So they're fighting for real now," Ron states the obvious.

"Sounds like it. But that burning phoenix mark is new." Harry's right, it is new; so new this is the first I've heard of it in fact.

"Maybe it's meant to scare Death Eaters?" that Ginny girl suggests. "Or for the Order to mark territory they take back or liberate?"

"If you want to send a message burn the mark into some idiot's flesh, not the ground," Pansy mutters. It might send a message, but I doubt it's the one the Order wants to send. But then, I didn't think they wanted open combat either, so perhaps I don't know them so well after all.

"That's not exactly the sort of tactics to use if you want to save the country," Hermione points out.

"Oh what a load. A mark lets everyone see who that Order fought, no more anonymity. Not that there really is anyway. I mean seriously, what is up with everyone having some secret society that isn't secret at all? Death Eaters? Does anyone not know who they are? That Order? I bet I can guess most of the members. The DA last year? That wasn't exactly a big mystery either. So what's the point? Everyone acts like the secret is all big and important, but it's totally not. There's no secret, but people want to keep acting like there is. What's the point?"

"The point, is that there's rules, laws," Ginny answers. "You can't just arrest someone randomly, you need evidence, proof, and with these secret groups you can't get that."

"Yeah, until someone decides not to play by the rules."

"You mean how the Death Eaters started attacking families and people's homes last time," Cho says.

"Unless the supposed good guys wise up and start doing something like that."

"What, you want to start attacking people in their houses?" Ron demands. Actually, it's one of the only times I can recall him actually talking to Pansy. Their mutual dislike is rather obvious. "I don't care if it's scum like your old boyfriend Malfoy, no one deserves to be attacked in their house."

"Oh, so it's ok to fight them if they're wearing a scary mask, but as soon as they take it off they're safe? How exactly do you expect to win that fight?"

"That's how it's done; it's what separates us from Voldermort. We don't just kill people," Harry answers.

"Yeah, yeah, I heard it all before."

In a way it's funny to see this debate; I've seen it in the Order too. A few of them want to fight directly and openly, but most of them like the odd rules with masks, as that Pansy girl put it. They have families, jobs, lives and they like being able to be in the Order part time, but with no real risk to it.

What's that English saying, have your cake and eat it too? They want that. They have the house, family, money job, and it's all normal. And then on weekends, after work and times like that they fight, acting like a sort of amateur police force, gathering evidence, finding proof, building cases. Of course at work their boss may be a Death Eater. In fact, probably is, since Dumbledore seems to like that idea, have opportunities to find things out and all that.

One set of rules for their normal identities, one set for their secret. It's truly bizarre. They wanted me to play that game as well, working at Gringotts. Looking through financial records, finding money used for whatever it is Death eaters use it for that's illegal. Bribes and such I suppose. Ghastly, boring job.

Not that people were happy when I said no. It seems telling Dumbledore no is simple something that's not done. At first it was this sort of shocked silence, then people telling me I couldn't say no, how dare I, what did I know and things like that. That Weasley woman was the loudest for that, part. But I don't care how loud she shrieks, I'm simply not going to sit and look at accounting ledgers all day long.

Finally, Dumbledore suggested this job, which at the time sounded better. It really isn't though. At its best it's babysitting, spying really, watching people and reporting if they do anything dangerous or strange. At its worst, though it's absolutely nothing. When everyone has class there is literally nothing to do. Sitting through classes I've already passed in France is painfully boring. I do now and then to maintain that cover story Dumbledore made up for me, but mainly I have nothing at all to do.

Considering the Order is apparently now openly fighting (despite giving me the distinct impression they wanted nothing to do with open warfare) you'd think they could ask me to help. I have the time; I certainly know how to take care of myself. I was a Triwizard champion, the best France has to offer. Instead the Order sees fit to let house wives and middle aged desk sitters do their fighting for . This just isn't why I came to England; not at all.

But, at least I won't be bored today. My spying targets are having a party for Cho, a late birthday celebration apparently, and I've decided to go along. No one said I couldn't, after all. Besides, it's something to do.

Hogsmeade is a small little village, probably only here because of the castle. Shops that sell to students, faculty and staff, a small inn that can't have many patrons, a few bars, that sort of thing. I suppose I could have stayed here, made the Order pay for a room for a year, it seemed pointless though. Dumbledore is letting me use one of the faculty apartments in the castle, which is more spacious. Besides, if I was here there'd be endless and annoying travel between the castle and the village.

The Three Broomsticks is where this party is being held. Actually it seems like the hub of all student activity in this village. I've just sat down at the table with everyone when Ginny looks at me."Wait a minute, who invited you?"

"I eat with you all normally, so I thought I would join you here as well," I reply.

"So in other words no one."

"It's fine," Cho tells Ginny.

"You would say that."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you seem to have picked Fleur there to be your idol or something," Ginny explains. "You dress like her, and you go around the castle all attention loving like her."

"Idol? Hardly. But if I'm looking for a girl to emulate she's scarcely a poor choice. She's beautiful, well known, very successful in school. Just what aspect do you find so repulsive?"

I had no idea Cho picked me to emulate. So does that mean that I'm partly responsible for her going from the rather forgettable girl from two years ago to the up and coming school queen she is now? It's a flattering thought. Beautiful, athletic, well endowed, becoming famous, she actually does have a fair bit in common with me. And of course she's dating Harry. Given how similar Cho is to me, it's almost like Harry wants to date me. I wonder, did he have a crush on me two years ago? I wish I'd known; it must have been adorable to see.

"The lack of modestly maybe? Any concept of what an appropriate amount of skin to show might be? A general sense of humility?" Ginny suggests.

"Those have their value, yes, but they aren't necessarily the virtues I find most admirable."

"Well doesn't that just figure."

"Girls, come on, don't fight? Please?" Harry interrupts. "This is a party, let's all try to be nice and have fun, ok?"

"Of course, Harry," Cho agrees.

"Yeah, fine," Ginny consents as well.

So the girls play nice. Actually it's more like mostly ignoring each other, but close enough, no? I'm actually not even sure what Ginny's problem with Cho and apparently me is. Oh well, it happens. Girls being jealous of me is hardly a new experience. They just need to get over it learn to live within their limits and in their place.

Things are normal right up until the birthday cake arrives. It's quite nice looking and we all sing Happy Birthday to Cho (most people rather badly off key.) Cho cuts the cake and hand out pieces to everyone. I go to eat mine but before I manage to start, I see something move out of the corner of my eye. I look over and Ron is gone.

There are several female yells from the direction of the girl's bathroom.

"Bloody hell!" comes a yell that sounds like Ron, from the exact same place.

Ron runs out of the girl's bathroom, with a girl following him, yelling and hitting him. "Pervert. Weirdo. This is the girl's bathroom. What are you doing in here? What kind of creep are you?"

At our table Pansy breaks up laughing. "Oh my god, I can't believe it actually worked."

"What did you do?" Hermione asks.

"I used a Portkey."

"What, you have a Portkey to get into the girl's bathroom?" Ginny looks at Pansy.

"Yup."

"Why do you have something like that? For that matter why would it even exist?" Cho wants to know. "Commentary on slothfulness aside, who makes a Portkey to a public bathroom rather than their private one?"

"Someone who wants a good laugh," Pansy answers.

"Ah?"

"I made it. Then when the cake came and that buffoon was drooling over it I switched his fork with one I'd made into a Portkey."

"But they don't teach how to make Portkeys at Hogwarts," Hermione points out.

"What do you think that book I've been looking at since we got back to school was? I taught myself. What, you thought I was doing homework or something?"

"I had hopes. You do need to think about a career, after all. We're in our sixth year, there isn't much time to choose one and prepare."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, need to pick some loser job, decide which office I'll sit in doing stupid busywork for crappy pay for the rest of my life. Gee, look how eager I am."

"I know it isn't the life you planned, but there's no real alternative, Pansy."

"Ah, yes, she's noble born but was disowned?" I ask.

"Yeah, my asshole parents tossed me out. So that means no big house, no gold, none of that for me. So I have to get some shit job so I'll be able to eat and all that when I get out of school," Pansy answers.

"Hey, Hermione, you're upset that she wasn't doing her homework, not that she used some Portkey to dump me into the girl's bathroom and have everyone thinking I'm sort of a creep or pervert or something?" Ron demands.

"Relax, Ronald. It's not as if your brothers haven't targeted you for pranks before. Besides, no one was hurt, it's just a bit of momentary embarrassment," Hermione tells him.

"That was different; that was family."

"So if your brothers made that Portkey it'd be all right?"

"Well no. Um, well, maybe. It's just… it's different." Ron stammers.

"It's a wonder he wasn't sorted into Ravenclaw." Pansy mutters.

"Hey, you shut the hell up."

"It's a shame the Portkey was single use."

These are the people I'm sent here to watch? A few oddballs and misfits, some of whom don't even like each other? An oddly matched lesbian couple that seems stable, if improbable and a couple that seems natural, almost expected but not necessarily so stable? Plus of course two people from that red headed family? Just what did Dumbledore think I was needed for here, relationship advice?

But then maybe I should poke at these relationships more;there might be something there to keep me entertained. Certainly it will be a better use of my time than pretending I'm writing some tedious research paper.

Author's Notes:

Thanks to that-fan for his help like always. Also thanks to people who review, it's much appreciated.