"Has she not slept at all?" Phoebe asked as Monica glided past them like a ghost to the bathroom, ignoring their hellos.

"It's been three days," Rachel whispered to her. Phoebe felt sick. It really was all too much for Monica to take. First losing Richard, then losing Chandler, without really realizing she had wanted Chandler in the first place. It would be so overwhelming.

"I don't know if she'll ever recover from this one," Ross said sadly. He hated seeing his sister so sad and depressed. He wished he could help her. He went back to his bowl of cereal. Phoebe wished she could tell them the other reason Monica was so upset. That reason was across the hall with Janice. Phoebe shuddered.

"Look what I found," Monica whimpered, coming into the kitchen and holding...

"Is that drain hair?" Rachel asked, worried.

"It's all I have left of him," Monica said. "This pile of gross, wet, drain hair. Yech!" She chucked it away, only to have it land in Ross's cereal. They all looked at it, and Ross felt like he was going to puke.

"Looks like a tiny drowning person," Phoebe noted. Ross gave her a look before dumping it down the drain.

"Honey, you need to get some sleep," Rachel said, rubbing Monica's back.

"I need some Richard," Monica replied. Or Chandler. But that was her secret. Her and Phoebe's. How was it possible to even miss someone she never really had feelings for in the first place? Or did she? She had no idea. She could hear Janice's howling laugh from across the hall, and it made her wince.

"They're not breaking up," Joey said, barging into the apartment. "Chandler and Janice. He didn't even blink!"

"They kind of are cute together," Rachel mused. Monica wanted to scream at her. Cute?! Janice was not cute. She was annoying and grating on the ears.

"This is Janice we're talking about here!" Joey yelped, echoing Monica's thoughts. "What are we gonna do?"

"I think, Joey, that we're just gonna have to accept that Janice makes Chandler happy," Ross said, his stomach finally not curdling anymore from the drain hair incident.

"No way," Joey argued. Monica was with Joey. Chandler deserved someone better than stupid Janice. But was she even the right person for Chandler? She'd never really thought about it, and now it was all she was thinking about aside from Richard. It was tearing her up inside. She also felt guilty for even thinking about Chandler when she still loved Richard. She went back to her bedroom amidst the calls of "Monica, no!" "Come on, Mon!" from the others. She just couldn't handle being around them right now.

Ross & Rachel-Evening

"I feel so bad for Monica," Rachel said. They were at Ross's apartment because Rachel didn't want to rub it in that she still had a boyfriend and Monica didn't.

"She'll be okay," Ross said absently. He was doing some work to catch up. Rachel sidled up next to him and kissed his cheek, making him kiss the air in return while still working. This went on a couple more times before he put down his work and turned to face her.

"I'm sensing you want something from me," he joked. She smiled demurely.

"Do you still have that pilot outfit?" she asked.

"Damn, no I don't. I had to return it," Ross answered. He was kicking himself for not just buying it. They had really good sex when he wore it.

"Hmm. Well, that's okay," Rachel said. "Tell me about one of your fantasies instead."

"W-what?" Ross asked, not hearing her correctly. She wanted to know about his fantasies? He wasn't sure if he could tell her. It was almost embarrassing.

"Yea. Tell me. I'll do it," she winked. He gaped at her. She really did want to know. He readjusted himself on the bed and started clearing his throat constantly.

"Are you sure?" he asked, gulping.

"Yes! It's only fair," she laughed.

"Okay," he said. Here went nothing. "Well..."

The Next Day

Trust Ross to have a fantasy about some science fiction film she could barely tolerate. Rachel had looked this up and discovered what he had been talking about. She could see the appeal, but she didn't know if she could pull it off for him. Phoebe entered the Perk then, and she turned to face her.

"Hey," Phoebe said.

"Hi," Rachel answered.

"You look weird," Phoebe noted.

"I'm just thinking about something Ross told me," Rachel said.

"Oohh tell me!" Phoebe said. It had to be better than the Richard/Chandler saga Monica had going on upstairs. She needed to hear something juicy after withstanding all that crying.

"Okay. There's this scene on Star Wars: Return of the Jedi," Rachel began.

"Yeah, oh Princess Leia and the gold bikini!" Phoebe cried, excited. "Yea, all guys our age love that bit."

"Really?!" Rachel asked. It was the first time she'd ever been asked to re-enact it.

"Yea. It was huge. The whole 'I'm a woman now!' bit instead of just being a helpless princess," Phoebe laughed.

"So you've done it?" Rachel asked.

"Oh yea! Loads of times," Phoebe nodded. "Ooohhh!"

"That good huh?" Rachel asked, laughing.

"No, I just got a new pager," Phoebe answered. "Got to check who's calling!" She got up and left Rachel sitting there with her brow crunched.

"Look who I found," Ross said, pulling Monica by the hand. She looked even worse than yesterday if that was possible. Rachel felt horrible for not staying with her last night now.

"You need to sleep," Rachel said to her.

"I know," Monica cried. Chandler walked in just then with Janice on his arm. She felt like she just got stabbed. Rachel mistook her gasp for further sobs about Richard.

"Come on, honey," Rachel said. "Let me take you home."

"Hey, Rachel! Look!" Phoebe called, making everyone look. She had buns up on her ears like Leia's hair. Then she noticed Ross and Chandler. "Oh crap."

"What is she doing?" Ross asked, very nervous suddenly.

"Ah hahahahaha!" Janice barked. "That's funny!"

"Oh, God," Ross said.

"Off we go, off we go!" Rachel shouted frantically. She yanked Monica around and tore out of the building with her. Ross was on her heels.

"Rach, is there something you want to tell me?" Ross asked, huffing out of breath behind them.

"Later!" Rachel called over her shoulder. Ross stopped at the bottom of the stairs. If Phoebe was imitating who he thought she was, he was never going to be able to look at her ever again.

Monica's apartment

"There we go," Rachel said, putting Monica to bed. Monica crawled under the covers but wasn't tired.

"Is the pain ever going to go away?" she asked Rachel.

"I...I don't know, sweetie," Rachel admitted.

"It just hurts so much," Monica sighed. They heard the door open and close then, and Phoebe came into the room out of breath.

"I'm sorry!" she said. "I didn't know he was standing right there..."

"Thanks a lot, Phoebs," Rachel snapped. "He was so mortified! Now I have to go calm him down."

"What's going on?" Monica asked.

"Ross asked Rachel to do the Princess Leia and the gold bikini fantasy for him in bed," Phoebe replied.

"Phoebe!" Rachel shouted.

"Sorry. Sorry!" Phoebe winced. Man she blabbed a lot.

"That's funny," Monica said, laughing. She couldn't stop laughing.

"Thanks a lot," Rachel said to Phoebe. She whirled on her heel and left. Monica finally stopped laughing after a bit.

"You didn't have to laugh so hard," Phoebe said to her.

"Sorry. I didn't think I'd ever be able to laugh again," Monica replied.

"Oh, well in that case," Phoebe started. She continued to re-enact the fantasy. Monica laughed even harder. Phoebe felt good about this. She wanted to see Monica happy again. After a while of this, Monica finally collapsed back onto her pillows and closed her eyes. Phoebe got an idea then. She dug into her purse to find her relaxing CD and put it on.

"What are you doing?" Monica asked.

"Helping you relax," Phoebe answered. "Now, listen to the plinky, plunky music. Go to your happy place." Monica's face broke out into a smile suddenly. Phoebe felt a little worried suddenly.

"Okay, tell me about your happy place," Phoebe said when Monica was silent.

"Richard's living room drinking wine," Monica answered.

"Okay. No. Put down the wine and get out," Phoebe said sharply. Monica opened one eye and looked at her. "No Richard!"

"Fine," Monica sighed.

"Use mine," Phoebe said. "But don't touch anything. Okay, you're in a meadow under a million stars..."

"Do you think I should have stayed with Richard?" Monica asked.

"There are no questions in the happy place," Phoebe tried. Monica was looking at her fully now.

"I'm serious, Phoebs. I think I made a big mistake," Monica said.

"Mon, you wanted different things. Are you gonna feel happy that you have a baby and he is resenting the whole thing?" Phoebe asked.

"No," Monica agreed sadly.

"Then you made the right decision," Phoebe said.

"And what about Chandler?" Monica asked. "How am I supposed to just ignore that he had feelings for me?"

"Do you feel the same towards him?" Phoebe asked. Monica thought hard.

"Not really," she replied slowly. She didn't think so anyway. Not right now. She still loved Richard.

"Then you can't bring it up," Phoebe explained. "You will only crush him. He's finally moved on, and he needed to do that. If you tell him you know, he'll go crazy and you guys won't get together and he'll be miserable forever and ever."

"Okay, okay, I get it," Monica said.

"Swear to me," Phoebe demanded.

"I swear!" Monica said loudly.

"Good. Now, go back to your...I mean my happy place. Listen to the water falling gently," Phoebe soothed. Monica made a disgruntled noise and got up.

"Where are you going?" Phoebe asked when she left the room.

"I'm not tired, and now I have to pee," Monica answered.

Joey & Chandler

Chandler had just left after their argument about Janice going to the hockey game with them. Joey sat there feeling a bit guilty about it. He just couldn't understand what Chandler saw in this woman after dumping her two times before already. Phoebe came in just then, and he noticed she looked annoyed.

"What's up?" he asked. He was surprised to see her here at all since she had been avoiding being alone with him.

"I just don't know how to help Monica," Phoebe sighed. She sat down in the chair beside Joey.

"She's really torn up, huh?" Joey asked.

"Yea. I think she might have tromped on some of my flowers in my happy place too," Phoebe answered. Joey wasn't sure how to respond to that.

"I don't know how to be around Janice without wanting to rip my own arm off and throwing it at her," he told her, changing the subject.

"That is a challenge," Phoebe nodded.

"Chandler is really upset with me. He just stormed out of here. I really can't believe he loves her," Joey sighed.

"Me either," Phoebe muttered.

"So, are we good now?" Joey asked suddenly.

"I guess we are," she agreed.

"Good," Joey said. He debated telling her that he was crazy about her. She might react very badly to that, especially when their friendship had been so rocky the past month. He guessed he'd just have to sit on it for now until they were in a place he could tell her.

"Helloooo!" Janice's voice called. Joey cringed deeply.

"Hi," he said glumly.

"So I hear you hate me," Janice smirked.

"I didn't say hate," Joey said quickly. "I was very careful about that."

"Well, wanting to rip of body parts to throw at me is pretty close to hate," Janice, braying with laughter.

"Oh, you poor soul," Phoebe muttered to Joey.

"So how are we going to get along?" Janice asked.

"I don't know. I know Chandler really wants us to," Joey replied.

"Well, let's start with Joey and Janice's day of FUN!" Janice screeched.

"Oh, God," Joey groaned. Phoebe laughed. Janice grabbed his hand and tugged him up and out the door. "Why a whole day?"

"Cos that's how long it takes to love me," Janice answered.

Ross & Rachel

"I can't believe you told Phoebe about the...the thing!" Ross spluttered.

"I'm sorry!" Rachel cried. "I didn't know it was such a secret!"

"She didn't know it was a secret," Ross said to nobody.

"Okay, who are you talking to when you do that?" Rachel demanded. He shook his head, looking at her again.

"It was a private thing between you and me," he said instead. "I just don't get why you shared it with Phoebe. Do you share everything?"

"We are girlfriends! Of course we share. I have dirt on her too, you know," Rachel said. Ross stood there wanting to know suddenly what this dirt was exactly, but he let it go.

"Well, I'd appreciate it if you didn't in the future," Ross said.

"Okay," Rachel agreed. "But I'm just saying, you should really share with your friends. It's liberating."

"Yea, okay," Ross snorted.

Chandler-Later

Chandler was standing in his kitchen thinking. He had just seen Monica go down the stairs looking like the shell of her former self. He felt really badly about her breakup. He knew how much she loved Richard. Before he could think about it too much, Janice came bursting in with Joey behind her.

"Hello," he said, peering at them curiously. "Did you two spend the day together?"

"We sure did!" Janice exclaimed. "I just came in for a kiss. I have to go get the little one." She planted on on Chandler and then was gone. Chandler turned to look at Joey, who had a pained expression on his face.

"You still can't stand her," Chandler said.

"I tried so hard, man. I really did!" he added. "But now I can be around her without wanting to choke her, and I think that's progress! I really want to work on this cos you're my best friend."

"Thanks, Joe," Chandler smiled.

Monica

She had returned from the coffee house and had put on the Civil War videos she had bought for Richard. She had a cigar lit in her hand as well. She was so tired, but she couldn't sleep. Why wasn't Richard calling her? Most people ignored it when you told them to not call. She would have called. Maybe she should call. Then there was a knock at her door, so she went to answer it.

"Hi, pumpkin," her Dad, Jack, said, standing there.

"Hi, Dad," she said. "What are you doing here?"

"It's your mother's bridge night, and I just wanted to make sure you're okay," he answered.

"Why wouldn't I be okay?" she asked.

"I saw Richard," he told her. She sat down.

"Oh," she said.

"Yea, so how are you really?" he asked.

"Fine. Just tired. How is he?"

"You don't want to know," Jack answered.

"I really, really do," she said.

"He's a wreck! Worse than when he and Barbara broke up," Jack added.

"Really? You're just saying that," Monica said. She felt relief suddenly. So Richard was just as a mess as she was.

"He's a total mess," Jack told her. "I'm not making it up." Monica closed her eyes, sinking back onto the pillows. Her Dad kept talking about something or other, but all she could hear and see was blissful darkness of sleep.

The Next Day

"You look better today," Ross noted. He had stopped by at the request of their father. Monica nodded.

"I think I just needed to know Richard was just as a wreck as me in order to sleep," she said.

"Well, I'm just glad to see you looking better," Ross smiled.

"I wonder what he did with the ring," Monica mused. Ross choked on his water. She looked at him curiously.

"How did you know about the ring?" he asked after clearing his trachea.

"I saw it in his coat pocket," she answered. "How do you know about the ring?"

"Nuh uh. No," Ross shook his head.

"Ross," Monica warned. "Did he tell you?"

"No," Ross said sharply.

"I don't understand. You knew about the ring but he didn't tell you?" Monica asked. "This doesn't make any sense! He was going to propose to me. You somehow found out about it. How did you not have...?"

"He wasn't going to propose!" Ross cut her off loudly. She looked at him, surprised.

"He wasn't?" she asked. "But...I saw it in his coat pocket..."

"It wasn't his coat," Ross told her quickly. She paused, thinking. Then she looked at him with wide eyes.

"It was your coat," she breathed. "That means..."

"Yes," Ross cut her off. "Please don't say anything. I mean it, Mon. It's too early. Rachel basically told me that."

"I...I won't say anything," Monica promised. "Wow, Ross. This is huge."

"Yea, it is, but I'd appreciate it if this just stayed between you and me," Ross said. His voice held a warning, so she nodded in agreement. He put his glass away and went to leave. He was going to be late for work. He hugged Monica goodbye and went on his way. Monica sank down onto the kitchen chair feeling heartbroken. So Richard wasn't going to propose to her. She really felt like a fool now.

A Week Later

Ross was at his wits end. None of his friends were ready, and now his girlfriend was in her room angry at him. Monica was obsessing over an old/new message from Richard and was freaking out about what to do about it. Phoebe looked ridiculous with a huge floral thing attached to her dress thanks to Chandler and Joey fighting over a stupid chair. He clutched his head in his hands. He was going to be late, and there was nothing more he hated than being late for something.

"Rach?" he asked, knocking. "Can I come in?" She opened the door in her sweats and a baggy sweatshirt.

"Whatever," she said, coming out.

"I know it's black tie optional, but that might be pushing it," Ross said, half teasing. She glared at him.

"I'm not going," she said.

"W-what?"

"Yea, I just got yelled at in front of my friends so I'm not really in a benefity mood," she replied.

"Oh, okay. I see. Rach, you gotta come," Ross begged. Phoebe's war cries in the other room made them all jump.

"Give me the phone!" Monica was screeching.

"No!"

"Wow," Chandler said.

"Here we go, buddy boy," Joey said, coming in. "You hide my underwear, I'm wearing everything you own. Too bad I'm going commando. Better not do anything like this!" He started to lunge.

"Oh my God! That is so not the opposite of taking someone's underwear!" Chandler yelped.

"Rachel, please, I'm sorry for yelling," Ross said.

"And humiliated. I was humiliated too," she told him.

"I'm sorry for all of that. I got crazy. It was stupid. I want you there. No, I need you there," he said. "How can I make this up to you? Show you that I really want you there?"

"Drink the fat," Joey suggested. He and Chandler had already tasted it, so why not Ross too?

"I believe this is an adult conversation," Ross said, turning to him.

"No, no, wait, wait, wait, I think it's a good idea," Rachel said. Ross stared at her for a second.

"All right then," he said. Joey handed it to him, bouncing with glee. "Bottom's up." He wanted to hurl, but if this is what it took to get her to go...

"Stop, stop, stop!" Rachel shouted. He paused, the rim at his lips. "I'll go. I can't believe you were gonna do that for me!"

"Let's see what else we can get him to do!" Joey exclaimed.

"No, it's okay. I'm gonna go get dressed," Rachel said, hurrying into her room. Phoebe came out then with two phones with cords dangling from them in her hands.

"Get dressed," Ross ordered Joey, who went across the hall still lunging with Chandler hollering at him to stop it.

"Your sister is one tough bitch," Phoebe said, "but I wore her down." She dropped the phones onto the table. Ross didn't reply and went to hail two cabs.

"I'm sorry," Monica said, running out. "I just can't leave it like this." She dialed Richard's number, beeped in, deleted all three messages, and recorded a new message. Then somehow, her new message became his greeting. She howled in dismay when she heard it say outgoing message was changed.

"Forget it," Phoebe said, grabbing her arm and hauling her out the door. "He'll be getting a new number now."

"This is so humiliating!" Monica cried.

"Two cabs people!" Ross called. Everyone went downstairs, so he waited for Rachel. She came out looking stunning.

"Ohhh," he said, looking at her.

"And with five seconds to spare," she said, kissing him.

"You look amazing," he said.

"Come on before we're very late," she said, tugging on his hand. "Oh, and uh, Ross?"

"Yea?"

"Joey's not the only one going commando tonight," she winked.

"Ohhhhhh," Ross moaned as they walked out.

Later

Everything had gone well except for Chandler's small freakout over someone taking his chair. Ross and Rachel were on their way back to his apartment, and it hit him what he wanted to do next.

"Wait here," he said when they stopped kissing for a moment in his living room. He rushed to his room to get it. It had to be now. She was radiant, he was confident, and he didn't care what her answer was. He wanted to do it. When he came back, she was sitting on the couch with her legs crossed.

"Are you okay?" she asked. "You're sweating."

"I...I know. Rachel, there's something I wanna say to you," he began.

"I'm listening," she said, leaning forward.

"I know that we've only been dating not quite seven months," Ross said. "But I really, really feel that you are the only person I want to be with forever."

"Oh, Ross," Rachel said, putting her hand to her face.

"I love you more than anything," he said, getting down onto his knee. "And I want you to know that I would do anything for you to make you happy for the rest of your life. Rachel, will you marry me?" He opened the ring box, and she gasped, staring at it. Her eyes went from him to the ring.

"Ross," she started. "Oh, Ross. Yes. Yes, I will marry you!"

"Really?" he asked. "It's not too soon?"

"No! I mean, we've known each other for years. This feels right," she said, tearing up. He placed the ring on her finger and kissed her.

"It does feel right," Ross agreed after.

"Oh my God," she said. "We're getting married!"

Hope you enjoyed.