A/N: Thanks for giving this story a shot! I love Risa evwn though she's kinda an asshole rn, I'm so pumped for her character development! Please tell me what you think and don't forget to follow me on Tumblr at: mortesangrizwrites . tumblr . com
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Risa was seven years old when her brother was born.
May was coming to an end, the spring air warm with the hint of summer around the corner. The scent of lilacs filled the garden, mingling with the delicate smell of roses and the sweetness of freesias, perfuming the air with the heady odor of blooming flowers. It was Mama's favorite time of the year, and by extension, Risa's as well. They often walked through the sprawling paths of the garden together, Mama holding her hand and telling her of the vast world- of the countries and cities beyond Italy, beyond the Bovino manor walls. Risa could never get enough of Mama's stories.
But today, she was alone in the garden, no hand holding her own, stabbing at the grass with a fork she had smuggled out from the dining hall. Originally, she was going to show Mama a cool trick she had discovered, about how the electricity curved around her skin with a tingle when she struck the fork in the power outlets.
Mama, however, had been unable to stay in the gardens for long. They had just reached the rosebushes when Mama froze. Her face had paled, lips parted in a cry of pain. She had folded onto herself, telling Risa to run and tell the maids that that baby was coming now.
Risa had done so and had watched with fear as Mama was whisked away by the manor doctors, by maids with flushed cheeks and excited smiles at the baby that was to come.
The baby. The same one that was hurting her mother right now.
"I hate that baby," she confessed, talking to a particularly wriggly earthworm she had dug out of the ground, "I hate that baby so much."
"Now, Risa," her Uncle's voice cut in, chiding and disappointed, "why would you say something like that?"
"Uncle," she gasped and hurried to her feet, brushing the dirt from her dress and turning to him, eyes wide. Her hands came up to clutch at his coat anxiously, the fork forgotten in the dirt behind her, "Is Mama okay?"
He blinked and smiled affectionately, "Some of the world's best doctors are in there with her now. Your Mama will be alright, I promise." He pat her head gently, the weight of his hand on her hair comforting and warm. "Now, what was that you were saying, you don't want a baby brother?"
Risa scowled and kicked at the ground, the toes of her dress shoes scuffing against the grass, "He's hurting Mama. I hate him. I didn't want a little brother anyway. He'll cry and poop and smell weird and I don't want him near me. Or Mama."
"Now, no need to be so grouchy," he laughed, "I felt the same way when your mother was born. We're almost ten years apart, after all. You and Lambo are close to eight. It's no surprise you feel that way too." He leaned in and whispered conspiringly, "I didn't like your mother until she was three months old, you know."
Risa scrunched up her nose, peering up at him in disbelief, "It's not the same! Mama is amazing and pretty and smart and strong; it's not the same at all, Uncle! I don't want to get stuck taking care of a baby!" She moved away from him, crossing her arms in front of her chest and stomping heavily on the spring clovers. Her eyes flashed angrily, "Why did Mama want another kid anyway? I'm right here, she doesn't need another one."
"She's not trying to replace you, Risa," he assured her, "The bond between siblings is a precious one, you'll grow to love your brother, I promise. You won't be able to imagine a life without him, this I swear. Plus," he added with a sly glance at her, "Your Mama will be depending on you to help take care of your baby brother, and you wouldn't want to let her down, now would you?"
"Well, if Mama needs my help there's no way I can say no," she grumbled, but argued no further, "I am curious to see what a little brother is like, so I'll give a shot at being a good sister," her eyes flicked up at him before quickly adding, "for Mama's sake."
"Oh Risa," Uncle said with an indulgent smile, "I know you'll be a great sister."
After Lambo was born, Mama called her into the room, beaming and sweaty but still beautiful, "Risa, this is your little brother, his name is Lambo. He's part of our family now, understand?"
She pressed him into Risa's nervous arms, showing her the correct way to hold him, even as Risa stared wide-eyed at the fussing baby in her arms. He was smaller than the machines she tinkered with over in the Research Wing, warmer too than the cold slabs of metal she was used to holding.
He was so small.
"Was I this tiny?" She asked, unable to tear her eyes away from her little brother.
Her mother laughed, "You were smaller than he is if you can believe it. I was almost scared to hold you, I thought I would hurt you by accident."
He had the same eyes as both her and Mama, bright green and curiously staring at her. His hair tickled her arm, black against the skin of her arm, wavy and soft. Risa could see her awestruck face in the reflection of his eyes. That may have been the moment she started to love her brother- with his mouth open in a gummy smile and a joyful gurgle bubbling from his lips.
"Lambo? You're just a baby now, but you're my brother and when you're bigger we can play together." She looked up at Mama, who watched the two of them with soft eyes, "And I don't know if I love you yet, but Uncle says that one day I'll love you most in the world. So I'll keep you safe until then, okay? Even then, I'll always keep you safe because we're family now, so I won't ever leave you behind. I promise."
Mama smiled at her, and she beamed in response.
In her arms, Lambo blew spit bubbles with his mouth, tiny hands clenched tightly around her finger.
(Years later, Risa would look back and think it was the happiest day of her life.)
.
.
.
"Is this the life you wanted us to have, Mama?" She would one day ask the cold tombstone, knees hugged tightly to her chest, vacant gaze staring down at the carpet of grass underfoot. It was spring perhaps, or maybe early summer. Lambo was still too young to roam around alone, three years old and growing fast, although it didn't stop the toddler from doing his best to throw himself into the first sign of trouble.
She had just killed again.
His blood was still wet against her skin, splattered across her face. Her hands felt heavy with the phantom weight of the gun, with the sharp knife she had to use to finish the job when her aim did not strike true the first time. Risa tilted her chin up, green eyes meeting the endless azure overhead, there was no cloud in the sky, "Or would you have wanted something better for us?"
She thought of the warmth of her brother in her arms, of how his sparkling eyes reminded her of Mama, made her feel like she was home. She thought of how he said her name, stumbling over the R and calling her ''Isa", too young to say the word sorella properly, but learning fast enough that he was sure to have it down in a few months, if that. She thought of how he always begged for her to carry him, how it was a request that filled her with warmth- with love but now grief, at the thought of touching Lambo with the same hands that…
She ducked her head, reaching to brush her hands across the stone but halting inches away, unable to stand the thought of soiling the grave with her filthy hands.
There was blood sunken into the crescents of her nails. They were the hands of a killer, of a Hitman. How could she lay her sullied hands upon her precious brother again? How could she touch him with the same hands that stole a life away for money and not feel sick to her stomach?
"I don't know what you would have wanted," she said, blinking quickly against the tears building in her vision, "but do you think, Mama, that you could forgive me if I want him to live a different life than this?"
There was no reply from the dead, and in the silence of her mother's grave, Risa wondered why her heart filled with disappointment.
(Years later, staring into the abyss eyes of the World's Greatest Hitman, with the threat of permanent separation hanging over her head, Risa Bovino would choke on the memory of those words- of the promises she had made to her mother and her little brother alike- and sell her life for love. )
"The Vongola?" She whispered, eyes unable to look away from the Arcobaleno's, "What are you saying?"
"What I'm saying is that Lambo has joined the Vogola's famiglia. There is nothing for you here."
"You can't take him!" She whispered, fear pounding in her chest but horror driving her forward, volume rising with every word she said, "You can't steal my brother away from my family! It's against the laws to take him without his family knowing, without me or my Uncle agreeing to let him go. I never agreed to something like this, I would never."
"Perhaps you wouldn't, but your Uncle did," Reborn said, "He offered up your brother to the Vongola after hearing what he's been up to. Lambo has been quite the pest, you should feel honored that he's under the protection of the Vongola now, considering your Uncle was so quick to be rid of him. I'm sure you can imagine what kind of danger an unwanted child would be in without the protection of a famiglia to keep him safe. The Vongola simply saved your brother from that fate."
The blood drained from her face at his words. Her breathing quickened, her pulse hammering away frantically in her ears. "No, Uncle is a bastard but he wouldn't-"
Give Lambo away? Sell his nephew off? Secure his place as Boss by removing the only male heir from his way? Remove the only thing that Risa would value over all else? Making sure she had no reason in life but to serve her family, the last tie to her mother and lost brother? Get rid of the child he couldn't stand?
Her chest felt heavy. There were more reasons why her uncle would want Lambo gone than there were reasons to defend him. Tears stung in her eyes, betrayal cutting deeply despite how much she told herself she never cared about her Uncle or his approval at all.
Everything she had done was for her brother.
For her brother and the famiglia she would one day inherit; not because she still dreamt of the family the three of them could still build, not because she looked at her brother and her uncle and wanted nothing more than to go back to the life they all had when Mama was still alive.
All the lives she had taken had been for a reason. All the death she had wrought had to be for something.
(Maybe, she thought, if she kept on telling herself that it would one day become the truth.)
She forced herself to turn the despair into fury, to change the heaviness in her heart into a fuel that she could use to carry on. She could be sad later, not now. Not when the World's Greatest Hitman was staring her down for a sign of weakness. Her nails cut into her palms until the torn flesh dripped blood onto the white sheets. She heard a yelp of shock, but ignored it, baring her teeth and glaring up at the Arcobaleno, "What did you promise him in exchange for my brother?"
Reborn did not reply immediately and his silence served to incense her further.
"What did you offer him for my brother's life!?" She snarled, sickened by the truth of her Uncle's actions and what that meant for her future with Lambo, scared that they would steal her brother from her, "What did you consider the same worth as my brother's life!?"
"N-now, I'm sure we can talk this out calmly," the short, scaredy boy said, shaking hands held in front of him and looking so submissive that Risa wanted to punch him in the face. What right did he have to look so pathetic when it was her life falling to pieces around her? "I'm sure Reborn didn't mean anything offensive, Bovino-chan, I think you should calm down first-"
"I didn't offer a single thing," the Arcobaleno interrupted, "Your Uncle considered the chance for Lambo to join the Vogola family an honor enough after his continued defeats."
"An honor!? Defeats!?" Risa howled, "He's five years old! He's barely old enough to wipe his own ass!"
Reborn gave her a closed lip smile, "That didn't seem to matter to your Uncle."
"So if I defeat you, it's my right as victor to claim him back?" Her words were desperate and her actions, even more so. Her hand reached into her mess of curls and grabbed ahold of one of the grenades hidden in her hair, ripping it from its hiding place and yanking out the pin with her teeth. She lunged, teeth bared, hand cocked back to throw the explosive.
She flew from the bed, bringing her arm forward to complete the throw but-
A sharp sting erupted in her neck, and her body went limp, the fingers curled around the grenade loosening and nearly dropping it to the floor, blowing them all up. But calloused fingers caught her hand in their own, wrapping around her fingers and the grenade at once, ensuring that the weapon didn't slip from her unresponsive hands. She was caught in strong arms before she could collapse to the ground.
"No," she cried out, straining against the invisible weight pressing against her body, "I have to win! I won't leave Lambo here by himself, I won't leave him behind- I promised."
The doctor holding her stared down at her with pity, before turning his gaze up to the baby still perched on the boy who had shrieked at her sudden attack; the other boy, the smiley one, had slid in front of him defensively in a second, "That was cruel, even for you."
"It was the truth." Reborn's words hung in the air, heavy, oppressive, ringing with a certainty that stopped her lungs from drawing any oxygen. "Lying to her about something like this would be cruel."
"Look at the poor girl," the doctor scoffed, "All she wants is her brother. At least grant her that much."
"We both know that letting her see him is less kind."
"Reborn," the shorter boy suddenly cut in, uncharacteristically somber, "I don't really understand what's going on, and I'm really nervous trusting her since she did just try blowing us all up. But I think everyone deserves the chance to see their family."
"Please," Risa begged, eyes glassy with tears she held back by sheer force of will, paralysed in the arms of the doctor. He propped her up so her neck didn't simply loll back, and if she wasn't so desperate to plead her case, the inability to move (to fight) would have made her sick to her stomach with more than just nausea. "I just want Lambo. That's all I want, to stay with him and keep him safe. I'll give you anything the Bovino has to offer, just don't take him away from me."
"Lambo isn't our hostage," the boy said in her direction, as if trying to reassure her of the fact, before directing his words back to the Arcobaleno, "What's wrong with letting them stay together, or just giving Lambo back? Family is the most important thing, you've said it yourself before, plus if Lambo has family to take him, isn't it easier to just give him to them?"
"In that case, Dame-Tsuna," Reborn stared at her, eyes as dark as ink and seeing right through her, seeing right into her heart. He seemed to find something that pleased him because a sudden, sharp grin cut across his face. "You wouldn't mind if she joins your family, do you?"
"Hieeee!?"
"Eh?"
"Shamal, you can let her move now."
The doctor sighed and flicked a finger. Tingling spread from her neck, and little by little, her body was hers to control once more. She jerked away from the man when she had the chance. Stepping away from all of them, back towards the bed she had leapt from in her rush to attack the Arcobaleno.
Reborn cocked his head, fedora casting his eyes into shadow. The self-satisfied smirk on his face, however, was impossible to miss. "Risa Bovino, you offered anything the Bovino family had to give so you could stay by Lambo's side- so what we'll take from the Bovino is one single thing. You."
He paused for dramatic effect, "Swear your fealty to the Vongola Decimo, Sawada Tsunayoshi, and you can stay by your brother's side as long as you want. Here. In Namimori. As a member of Tsuna's family."
Risa was baffled. His family? Reborn wanted to secure an… engagement? A blush rose in her cheeks and she shook her head. No, he said Vongola Decimo. He meant family as in famiglia. As in mafia family.
"I… Decimo… What!?" She sputtered in disbelief, mind spinning at the illusion of choice placed before her. Her brother or her family? There was no hesitation in what Risa would choose, both she and the Arcobaleno knew it.
Did Reborn want the assurance that the Bovino would be loyal to no one but the Vongola, especially once she took over the family, especially if she nursed the hatred she felt towards the famiglia that had stolen her brother away?
By allowing her to choose between her famiglia and her brother, he was putting the power in her hands and washing the Vongola of the consequences of taking Lambo, either she swore loyalty and forgave them; or Risa would lose Lambo, with no knowledge of what would happen to him once she was forced away. His life would hang over her head, a threat to keep her in place without the assurance that he was truly alive and well.
A part of her felt a pang at the thought of leaving behind the place she had known her entire life, even if she had always planned to leave it and run with Lambo. But the choices given to her weren't much choices at all, just a single one masquerading as mercy.
How could she choose anything that would separate Lambo and her?
That was the thing. She couldn't.
There was only one path left to her, and that was to duck her head, swallow her pride and hand herself over to the Vongola. She took shaky steps until she was in front of the black haired boy, moving until she was at an angle where both boys were visible to her. She wasn't sure which of them was the Vongola Decimo, but she couldn't risk offending either of them.
She pressed her right hand over her heart, slowly dropping to her knees in front of them, gritting her teeth at the submissive action. She met both of their eyes, but her gaze was held in place by the smaller boy, a horrified light visible in those hazel eyes. This, she thought, must be Tsunayoshi. The black-haired boy didn't have as much understanding of what was going on as the other one did.
Raising her chin in a single moment of prideful defiance, she held Tsunayoshi's gaze for a long moment before dropping her eyes to stare intently at the stained floor. In theory, she knew exactly what she had to say, but never in her life did she imagine she would be in a situation where she had to use those words.
Words were suddenly hard to shape on her tongue but she managed to choke them out, "I, Risa Bovino, as the heir and future boss of the Bovino famiglia, swear fealty to Sawada Tsunayoshi, the Vongola Decimo, under the condition that I will not be separated from my brother again- and that the Vongola will offer its protection to him from anyone that seeks to do him harm. I, as the future boss of the Bovino swear that the Vongola Decimo will have the loyalty of the Bovino family from here on forth."
"Does the Vongola Decimo, Sawada Tsunayoshi, accept this oath of fealty and the conditions that come with it?" Here she finally glanced back up, meeting wide hazel ones that flinched at the intensity of her gaze. She did not look away from him, green eyes seeming to glow as she waited for his response.
Reborn swatted at Tsunayoshi's head, smacking him out his daze, "Do you accept, Dame-Tsuna?"
"I-I… There's no way I can-" Reborn hit him harder his time, scowling.
"Do you accept, Dame-Tsuna?"
Finally, after what felt like an agonizingly long time, the boy nodded.
But it was enough to bind her to him under the Mafia Laws of fealty. Risa Bovino now belonged to the Vongola Decimo, and as long as she was heir, so did her famiglia in the future. He had just chained Risa to him until one of them died, she thought bitterly, and the stupid boy didn't even know it.
Tsunayoshi looked petrified, face ashen and knees knocking together in fear. He looked like the furthest thing from a Boss, like a strong breeze would push him over without even trying. This was the person she had sold herself to? This was the person Reborn had wanted her to serve in exchange for her brother?
How was there any way that this kid had a famiglia of his own?
Risa forced herself to push those thoughts away.
He had given her the chance to stay with Lambo, no matter how badly his suggestion had backfired on her. Her freedom may be gone, but at least she had her brother.
His friend, on the other hand, looked absolutely delighted by the change of events, beaming at her like a long-lost friend. "You're going to join us in the mafia game, Lambo's sister?"
"Mafia… game." She repeated lamely, "You think the mafia is… a game?"
He laughed and sheepishly scratched the back of his head. "I'll admit I don't know a lot about it, but it's been pretty neat so far. The kid has really made things exciting around here. It'll be nice to have someone else to play with us, the more the merrier, right!?"
The kid being… Reborn? She glanced at the Hitman, before quickly averting her eyes. She really didn't want to know the kind of chaos someone so powerful and reputable was capable of creating in such a sleepy town as this one. Although, considering she had just tied herself to this sleepy town and the boy staring at her with fear and resignation, Risa supposed she was going to find out firsthand.
"I guess so," she muttered in response, slowly getting to her feet. She tilted her head at the doctor, exhausted by the unexpected events that greeted her after waking up. "Can I have my stuff back?"
"Your things should be on their way as we speak," Reborn said with a cheerful smile, as if he hadn't just forced her into a family she didn't want to be part of after delivering the news that her Uncle had betrayed her trust. "In fact, they should be here any second now-"
Just then, the door slid open harshly, slamming into the wooden frame with a loud bang.
"Oi! Why am I the only one that had to carry all shit here!? You could have made yourself useful, baseball idiot, and helped! This crap is-" the words came to a sudden halt as their speaker saw her.
Risa's eyes grew wide. All the air whooshed out of her lungs, leaving her breathless in surprise. She drank in the sight of the boy in front of her, a flush to his cheeks, gauntness filling out and nearly gone, eyes bright even with his nose scrunched up in anger.
Her heart stuttered and dropped like an anchor from her chest, down to the ground where she had just kneeled and swore her loyalty to a complete stranger. "Hayato? Is that you?"
And like a person staring down the wrong end of a gun barrel, with dread and resignation, Hayato Gokudera, a person that Risa had never thought she would see again- flinched and met her startled gaze in defeat. "Risa," he replied with a grimace, bright eyes dimming into something more subdued at the sight of her, "We need to talk."
Of all the things she expected to await her in Japan, seeing a ghost wasn't one of them.
"We need to talk," he said; as if that sentence was enough to clear up the years of anguish she had experienced at his disappearance- as if she could put to words the scrambled mess of emotions she was feeling, as if she could talk herself into understanding that he had been alive this whole time.
"Hayato, I-" He sent her a sharp glance. One that clearly said, not now. The words froze in her throat.
But when was the right time for what she wanted to say? When was the right time to ask him what he was doing here- when she had spent the past two years thinking something terrible had befallen him, when she was suddenly faced by a version of her friend that wanted nothing to do with her.
"I want to hear this," Reborn said, a dangerous curiosity alight in his eyes as he looked between them. "I'm interested to hear how you two know each other- I'm sure Tsuna is dying of curiosity as well."
Tsunayoshi looked panicked, he shook his head and waved his hands defensively. "I don't need to hear this, we can give you guys some privacy if you want-"
"But you're curious too," Small fists yanked on brown hair, hard. "Aren't you Tsuna?"
"Owww, Reborn please let go-"
"I'm sorry Tsuna," the black-haired kid said, laughing sheepishly, "But I kinda want to know how they know each other. This feels like a live-action soap opera doesn't it? Isn't that exciting!?"
"But it's rude to just- You're going to rip out my hair- listen into a personal conversation! Gokudera-san, Bovino-chan, you don't have to talk about this in front of us if you don't want to."
"Hayato knew a girl this cute and never mentioned it?" The perverted doctor muttered from behind her, "That damn brat." Risa heard the bickering, could see the flailing in her peripheral vision- but her eyes were locked on another set of green eyes, ones she had never thought she would see again.
Hayato, she wanted to say, where did you go back then? Was it me? Was that why you left?
Instead, she bit her tongue, catching the way Hayato's gaze flicked over to her new Boss- taking note of how his eyes softened at Tsunayoshi's attempts at politeness. Was she nothing in comparison to this frightened boy, what was so special about him that an Arcobaleno vouched for him- that Hayato looked to him in matters between Risa and himself?
Something in her stomach twisted. Jealousy rose up her throat, leaving her mouth bitter with the flavor of envy. She used it to coat her words in saccharine poison, trying to hide the hurt Hayato's absentminded devotion brought to her. Her eyes caught his once more, narrowing and growing cold, while her words were directed to Reborn and the bumbling boy under him.
"Well," she drawled, "It sure is a long story, isn't it, Gokudera-san."
A look of horror bloomed in his gaze. Risa curled her lips into a smile, fluttering her eyes and casting a peek at Tsunayoshi through her lashes. He stared at her, unsure whether to let her continue or not, she could see it on his face.
"But I can't just leave the Vongola Decimo waiting in suspense! Especially now that he so graciously allowed me into his family." At this, Tsunayoshi flinched and Hayato reeled back as if struck.
"T-tenth, is that true? You accepted her into your family?"
"It's complicated," Tsunayoshi groaned, rubbing a hand across his face, "It has to do with Lambo and her Uncle and-" he continued on, explaining himself as if he wasn't the heir to Italy's most powerful mafia family.
How pathetic, she thought, stopping her lip from curling in distaste by sheer willpower. Would her entire life be wasted following a leader she couldn't find it in herself to respect? What did that say about her, that all her potential had been tied to a boy who couldn't meet her eyes for long?
Reborn's black eyes bored into her knowingly, but this time- with her empty victory of staying by Lambo's side even if it gave the chains around her a new name, with her lost and mourned childhood friend pushing her aside for stranger she had to swallow her pride and swear allegiance to- the press of his eyes was tolerable.
Risa didn't find it in herself to care what he thought of her at that moment.
"So, Gokudera-san, do you want to start this off?" She smiled again, this time with teeth.
"Or should I?"