"I can't believe Chandler is only selling this for fifty bucks," Joey whined. "I put my heart and soul into this unit!" Chandler had just left to go to Monica's to see Zoey when Phoebe stopped by. He had shared his annoyance to Joey's screening process before he went.
"I can't believe Ross thinks I'm crazy for believing this is my mother," Phoebe said, petting the cat that was sitting on her lap. Joey gave her a skeptical look but kept his thoughts to himself.
"What am I gonna do, Phoebs?" he asked instead.
"Haggle?"
"I'm not very good at that," he admitted. Phoebe cuddled with her cat mother and whispered into its ear. The chick and the duck had split as soon as they saw the cat come inside. Joey didn't blame them.
"Heard from your other M-O-M?" Joey asked. Phoebe gave him an appreciative look.
"No. I'm gonna call her later today," she answered. "This is so cool!"
"I think I hear breakfast," Joey said, craning his head in the direction of Monica's place. Zoey was leaving today with Emily. Joey knew Chandler was going to be bummed out afterwards.
"Let's go then," Phoebe responded. Everyone was there. Ross and Rachel had returned two days before from their honeymoon nicely tanned and glowing. Richard was cooking eggs, and Monica was working on french toast. Chandler and Zoey were on the chair together while Emily sat talking to Rachel animatedly.
"Hey," Ross said. He eyed up the cat. "So Phoebs, how long is your mom gonna be with us?"
"I'm not sure. I guess when she's used to there being another M-O-M around," Phoebe answered. "She might feel like she's being replaced." She picked up the cat and rubbed noses with it. "But that's not gonna happen! Joey, can you hold her while I make a call in the other room?"
"Sure," Joey agreed, taking the cat off her.
"Why can't you call out here?" Monica asked, confused.
"Because I'm calling a certain mom at the B-E-A-C-H," Phoebe answered. Then it hit her. "Damn it! I spelled the wrong word." She shook her head as she went into Monica's room.
"Is anyone else concerned that Phoebe thinks her mom is a cat?" Ross asked when she was out of earshot.
"Oh, honey," Rachel said. "Let her have this. It's making her happy."
"Am I the only one worried about our friend's sanity?" Ross added.
"Ross," Monica warned.
"All right, all right," he said.
"Well, time to hit the road," Emily said, looking at her watch. "It's been lovely seeing you all."
"Yes," Zoey chimed in, hopping up off of Chandler's lap. "I had a great time." Monica made a face to herself. Chandler followed them out into the hallway.
"You'll be coming back, right?" he asked. Zoey paused, making Emily stop too.
"Go ahead, Em, I'll catch up," she said. Emily gave her a warning look before turning away and leaving.
"I'll miss you," Chandler said, trying to kiss her.
"Look, Chandler," Zoey started.
"Oh no. Nothing ever good came out of a sentence that started with that," Chandler said, worried.
"This has been really fun, but that's all this was: fun. I'm not looking for a relationship. I have my life back home, and I'm not leaving it," she told him. Chandler stood there, stunned. He didn't know why he thought something was going to come out of this. Of course she had a life back home. Just like he had a life here.
"Right," he said finally. "I get it."
"I'm sorry," she winced.
"Don't be. It was fun," he replied. She gave him one last kiss before picking up her bags and going down the stairs. Chandler stood in the hallway unsure of what to do next.
Later
Still feeling depressed, Chandler opened his apartment door and shut it behind him, tossing his keys. When they hit the floor, that's when he looked up. Just like his heart, the apartment was empty.
"OH MY GOD!" he shouted.
"WHAT?!" Joey's voice sounded from inside the unit. Inside the unit?! Chandler rushed over and pulled out the hockey stick.
"Are you all right?" Chandler asked, opening the door.
"Yea," Joey said sadly. Then he saw the apartment. "Aww man! He promised he wouldn't take the chairs!"
"How the hell did this happen?! How were you locked in there?! And where the hell is our stuff?!" Chandler shouted.
"Well, this guy came to look at the unit and said he didn't think a grown man could fit in there..."
"Oh my God. You got in there voluntarily?!" Chandler demanded.
"I was trying to make a sale! You know what I'm gonna do the next time I see that guy?"
"BEND OVER?!" Chandler roared.
"What's with all the yell-?" Monica started before seeing the apartment. "Oh my God. What happened?!" Richard was behind her.
"JOEY LET A MAN ROB US!" Chandler shouted.
"I didn't do it on purpose!" Joey defended himself. Chandler looked at him incredulously.
"You got in the unit! You let him lock you in there!"
"I didn't know he'd do that..."
"If you hadn't been so damn fussy about who buys this piece of shit..."
"Hey, whoa!" Joey cried.
"Guys! Stop yelling," Monica said, stepping between them. "Maybe we can find the guy who did this."
"I'll call a friend," Richard said, going over to Monica's to get the phone.
"Is he friends with everyone?" Joey asked, amazed.
"You wanna hope so cos I just might not be your friend anymore," Chandler muttered to himself.
"Chandler," Monica warned, having heard him. "Walk it off." Chandler huffed and went out into the hall. She turned to Joey.
"I swear I didn't know he'd do that, Mon," Joey said.
"I know," she answered. She gave him a hug. Within the hour, everyone was in the apartment.
"Wow they really got you guys," Rachel said sadly. Richard's cop friend said he'd look into it, but Chandler wasn't holding his breath.
"What did the insurance company say?" Ross asked.
"They said, 'You don't have insurance here. Stop calling us,'" Chandler answered.
"I came as fast as I could," Phoebe said, rushing in. She still had the cat much to Ross' dismay. He turned to the others, who all turned to stare at the ceiling.
"Didn't I tell you guys a little girl had lost this cat?" Ross asked. "That you were supposed to tell Phoebe?" They all muttered incoherently.
"Tell me what?" Phoebe asked, looking at them.
"Phoebs, a little girl owns the cat," Ross said, showing her the flyer. She stared at it.
"We're sorry, honey," Rachel added.
"I see," Phoebe said, looking at it still. "But...she chose me. I have to respect her decision right?"
"Oh yea," the others said in unison. Ross glared at them.
"Phoebe, this is a little girl's cat, okay? She's missing him. Julio the cat. It's not your mom," he emphasized. "I'm sorry you feel guilty for spending time with your new mom, but don't let this little girl miss her cat because you need it to be your mother." Phoebe put Julio down and turned to face Ross.
"How many parents have you lost?" she asked him.
"Well, none..."
"Then you don't know what it's like to have one come back," she cut him off. "So what if I'm wrong? Be a friend. Just be supportive, okay?"
"All right," he agreed. "I'm sorry."
"My mother would like an apology too," Phoebe added. The others stifled their laughter and smirks as he looked at them.
"Okay," he nodded. "Come here, Mrs. Buffay. Come on." The cat moved closer to him. "I'm sorry I was so insensitive and said you were just a cat when you're clearly the reincarnated spirit of my friend's mother."
"We both forgive you," Phoebe smiled, picking up her cat mother again.
"What about the little girl?" Monica asked.
"I'll do the right thing," Phoebe replied. She looked at the cat. "I love you, Mom. You can come back anytime."
"If she'd come back as furniture, that'd be great," Chandler commented.
"We have an extra futon," Ross started.
"Don't brag, okay? We got nothin' here!" Joey exclaimed. Ross and Chandler exchanged looks.
A Week Later
"I can't believe I'm going to do this," Monica muttered.
"Do what?" Rachel asked. She and Ross had come over to visit. Phoebe was already there.
"I'm catering an event for Mom," Monica replied. "I must really hate my self-respect right now."
"How is the catering business going?" Ross asked, remembering that it was Monica's plan that Richard helped prompt.
"I'm catering for Mom. What does that tell you?" she questioned sarcastically.
"I see," he said.
"I can help," Phoebe piped up. "Oohh it'd be so much fun!"
"If you want," Monica agreed.
"Do you have any juice?" Rachel asked, looking in the fridge.
"I think Beavis and Butthead took it," Monica answered. "By the way, don't any of you know how to make your own breakfast?"
"Yours is better," Rachel shrugged. She went over to Chandler and Joey's to find the juice.
"Hey," Joey said when she came in. He was sitting on an old rusted lawn chair. Rachel eyed it up. "Oh this? Treeger said we could have the furniture from the basement."
"I get it," she nodded. "Any juice?"
"Just pickle," Joey answered. Just then, a woman came out of the bathroom wearing a towel with another wrapped around her hair. Rachel stared.
"Hello, Rachel," Joanna said, going into Chandler's room.
"Wh-what, what!" Rachel spluttered.
"Hey, Rach," Chandler said, also coming out of the bathroom.
"Why is my boss here?!" Rachel demanded.
"Your boss?" Chandler asked, surprised. "Joanna?"
"Yes!"
"Oh. I didn't realize she was your boss," Chandler chuckled.
"Didn't you ask where she works?"
"Well, I didn't think that everyone who worked at Bloomingdale's was your boss," Chandler pointed out.
"Well that one is!" Rachel snapped. "You can't date her!"
"Why not?!"
"Because! If you screw up, she'll fire me!"
"Oh please," Chandler snorted. Joanna came out just then.
"Rachel, aren't you running late?" she asked.
"What? No," Rachel answered, looking at her watch.
"You are if you're picking me up a bagel," Joanna smirked. She gave Chandler a peck before leaving.
"End it, end it NOW," Rachel commanded.
"Okay, okay," Chandler said. "I'll do my best."
Monica & Phoebe
Monica was wringing her hands furiously. She was missing a nail. Her nail was in one of those quiches. This was turning out to be a disaster. Phoebe was trying to make her feel better, but she had to tell her mother.
"Uh, Mom?" Monica started. "Don't freak out, but there's a blue fingernail in one of the quiche cups and no way of finding out which one." Judy started chuckling.
"I'm not freaking out," she said.
"Then why are you laughing?"
"No reason. Your father owes me five dollars is all."
"You bet that I would lose a nail?"
"No, no. I bet that I would need these," she said, opening the freezer and revealing the lasagnas.
"You bet that I would screw up?!" Monica asked, outraged. "So you didn't hire me because I was good."
"I did! That part is true. This is just in case you pulled a Monica," Judy answered. Monica broiled inside. How dare her mother use that phrase again!
"Come on," Judy said. "Laugh at yourself! You're always so serious."
"My Mom has no faith in me, ha, ha, ha," Monica said. "That's hilarious! Ha, ha, ha!"
"I have faith..."
"No, you have lasagnas," Monica snapped before storming off.
"I'm so lost," Phoebe said, following after her.
Rachel
Chandler was in her boss' office. Chandler was handcuffed to her boss' chair. What the hell was happening here?! Sophie was looking at her curiously as she paced madly about the office. What was she gonna do?! Her intercom buzzed just then.
"What?!" she snapped angrily.
"Rachel? Can I see you for a moment?" Chandler's voice came over the intercom. Ohhh buddy was so gonna get it! She stormed into Joanna's office and slammed the door behind her.
"Here's the thing," Chandler started. "The keys to these cuffs are on the back of the door. Can you be a doll and get them for me? Nice pantsuit by the way."
"You told me you were ending this!" Rachel exploded.
"I did! She took it really, really, well!" Chandler argued.
"How could you not think about my career being in jeopardy?!"
"I did! Then something made it shoot right out," Chandler shrugged. Rachel wanted to slap him.
"You got yourself into those cuffs, you get yourself out of them," she growled, turning to leave.
"No, no, no, no!" he shouted. "You must have me confused with the Amazing Chandler. I can't get out of these! I'm cold and-" He stopped to look up the ceramic woman's skirt.
"Oh my God," Rachel snapped. "Fine!" She grabbed the keys and walked towards him. "You never see Joanna again!"
"Never!"
"You never come into this office again!"
"Fine!"
"You give me back my Walkman!"
"I...I never borrowed your Walkman," he answered, puzzled.
"Fine, then I've lost it. You buy me a new one!"
"Deal!"
Rachel unlocked the cuffs, and Chandler made a groaning noise while rubbing his wrists.
"It hurts?"
"Nah. I've just always seen guys do it on TV," Chandler shrugged. He moved to the door. "Hello, sweet pants!" Rachel watched for a minute before realization hit her.
"Wait! What are you gonna tell Joanna?"
"I'll lie. I'm good at that. I actually did borrow your Walkman," Chandler snorted.
"There's nothing to lie about! She's gonna know I have a key to her office, that I was in here and let you out! I'm gonna get fired!" Rachel cried. She went over and pulled on his arm, dragging him hopping on one leg over to the chair.
"What are you doing?!"
"Putting you back the way you were!"
"Oho no!" he argued. They wrestled for a moment before Rachel managed to cuff him to the filing cabinet. He looked at his wrist and back at her.
"Well, this is much better."
"Damn it! Chandler!" Rachel begged.
"No!"
She started bartering with him things she would do for him if he would let her lock him back up in the chair. He exclaimed "no" to all of them. Then it hit her.
"I've got it," she smirked. He peered at her.
"You don't have it," he said.
"Oh yes, I do. There's gonna be rumors about this. Sophie knows. Monica and Phoebe know."
"How do they know?"
"I called them," she answered. "And I can be very generous or very stingy." She gestured with her hands to show him. His eyes widened.
"Go on," he said.
"I can make you a legend," she told him. "The next Milton Berle."
"And he...?"
"Not compared to you," she smirked. Chandler bobbed his head with a smile on his face.
Monica & Richard
"So you showed her, huh?" Richard asked. They were at the coffeehouse together. Monica had finished telling him how she had pulled herself together and made a dish so good the lasagnas weren't even touched. Richard smiled at her gestures.
"I did! I'm getting the hang of this catering thing," she laughed.
"Good for you," he said, kissing her. Monica breathed him in. It was so nice to have someone who cared. They'd been dating again for just about a year, and she wondered if he was thinking about marriage yet. She had.
"Hey," Rachel said, coming in with Ross. Phoebe and Joey were behind them. Monica peered at Phoebe, who seemed flustered almost. It was odd.
"What are you all doing together?" Monica asked.
"Chandler's coming, and I wanted to see this for myself," Rachel said, winking. They got settled just as Chandler entered. Rachel gestured to Monica and Phoebe to start. They made eyes at him when he got closer, and he was smirking and basking in the glory.
"Hello, Chandler," Phoebe said, winking.
"I love you," Chandler said to Rachel, kissing the top of her head.
"What's going on?" Joey asked, confused. Phoebe leaned in to tell him and Ross. They sat back, snorting.
"He does not!" Ross exclaimed, laughing.
"Two whole hours that lasted," Chandler sighed.
"Please tell me you broke up with her," Rachel begged.
"Oh, yes," he nodded. He had left Joanna right where he had been a few hours before. It seemed like the perfect revenge.
A Week Later
"Is he gone?" Phoebe hissed. Joey stuck his head out his door and looked. Chandler was nowhere to be seen.
"Yup," he answered. Phoebe hurried to change and got out of his room fast.
"Is he still asking you about me?" she asked.
"Naw. He seems to have let it go for now. We've also been more careful," Joey replied.
"The secrecy makes it so much better," she winked.
"Of course," he agreed, smirking. Chandler came back then, yelling back at someone. Then he slammed the door. Phoebe and Joey stared at him, and he stared back.
"What's going on?" Joey asked. Chandler pointed at Phoebe.
"She wasn't here when I left," he said.
"She just got here."
"I was in the hallway, and she didn't pass me," Chandler went on. He looked back and forth between the two. "Is there something you want to tell me?"
"Nope," Phoebe replied. She went to leave when Chandler caught her elbow.
"Are you two sleeping together?" he demanded. Neither Joey or Phoebe were great at thinking on their feet.
"Well," Joey started.
"Define 'sleeping,'" Phoebe said.
"Oh my God!" Chandler cried. He released her. "You are!"
"Okay don't freak out," Phoebe started.
"Too late," Joey said as Chandler started hyperventilating.
"You...y-y-you," he kept saying.
"Shhh! Chandler!" Phoebe shouted, smacking him upside the head. That stopped his panic attack.
"Dude, we don't want everyone to know," Joey chimed in. Chandler gaped at them while rubbing his head where she'd hit him.
"This is huge! I can't keep this quiet!"
"Oh but you will," Phoebe threatened. "Or do I need to remind you why not?" Chandler gulped. He forgot about their little deal.
"You have dirt on Chandler? Why didn't you tell me?" Joey asked, hurt.
"Cos I promised. He'll blow it eventually, and when he does, I'll blow his secret too," she said menacingly.
"Nothing will pass these lips I swear," Chandler promised, holding his hands up.
"Good," Phoebe said, smiling again. She patted him on the shoulder. "I'm off to work."
"Hey, do you think you could give me another massage?" Joey asked. "My back has been aching again." He followed Phoebe out the door, leaving Chandler to mock gagging as he realized why Joey's back has been hurting. Then he went over to Monica's to warn them about what Treeger had said. Chandler had unfortunately gotten into it with Treeger over the garbage disposal. The man had actually almost made him cry, but he pulled it together enough to let him have it back. Then Treeger let the bombshell of Monica illegally subletting her apartment to Emily. He told Chandler they'd get kicked out. When he got to Monica's, however, Joey and Phoebe were there too. He cringed inside.
"Oh please tell me I don't have to go to work today," Phoebe complained.
"Why?" Monica asked.
"Cos there's this hot guy I have to massage, and I want to do stuff to him that I'm not paid for," she explained. Chandler almost choked. Joey gave him a warning look.
"So do them for free," Monica laughed.
"Oh no, no I can't. It goes against my oath as a masseuse," she answered.
"You took an oath?" Ross asked, confused.
"I made it up myself," she told him, smiling.
"Can't you get someone else to do him?" Chandler confronted, giving her a look.
"Oh no," she smiled. "I can handle him." Chandler wanted to hurl.
"You look frazzled, Chandler," Rachel pointed out.
"Oh, well, you see," he started. Phoebe and Joey both looked at him. "I, uh, got into it with Treeger, and he's gonna throw you and Emily out. See ya!" He went to take off.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Monica cried, grabbing his collar and making him squeak. "What?!"
"You heard me," he said.
"Explain!"
So he did. Monica stared at him.
"You get your ass back down there and suck up to him. I mean suck like you've never sucked before!"
"Joey, can you come with me?" Chandler asked.
"Why?"
"Cos he's big and mean," Chandler replied. Joey rolled his eyes but complied. When they got there, Treeger looked as though he was in a bad mood.
"What do you want?" he asked roughly.
"Please don't kick the girls out," Chandler started. "It was my fault."
"You want me to kick you guys out instead?"
"No!"
"Where would the duck and the chick live?" Joey asked.
"You have pets?!"
"No, no," Chandler said smoothly. "That's our nicknames."
"I'm the chick," Joey said immediately.
"Yea, you look like a duck," Treeger said to Chandler, nodding. Chandler burned inside.
"Come on, whaddya say?" he said instead of blowing up. "We'll do whatever you want."
"Hmm. Anything?"
"Sure."
"Will you be my dance partner?" Treeger asked.
"Joey?" Chandler said, turning to him.
"But-"
"I have two left feet when it comes to dancing," Chandler explained.
"Well, chick," Treeger said. "You in or out?"
"I guess I'm in," Joey answered, glaring at Chandler, who felt success and getting back at Joey for making him keep his affair with Phoebe secret.
"See you later then," Treeger said, turning back to his work. Chandler and Joey went back upstairs. Joey looked at his watch.
"Damn it! I'm late!" he said, rushing off.
The Next Day
"I got fired!" Phoebe cried, collapsing onto the chair. Monica and Richard were there with the others.
"No! Why?" Monica asked.
"My boss caught me making out with hot guy," Phoebe whimpered. Joey felt very bad for this. He wanted to convey that to her. He knew he shouldn't have gone in there and gotten her riled up.
"I'm so sorry," Rachel said, getting up to give her a hug.
"I've never been fired before," Phoebe cried. Chandler gave Joey a look, which Joey ignored.
"I know someone," Richard piped up, making them all look at him.
"Seriously, how do you know someone for everything?" Ross asked, amazed.
"I have connections," Richard winked. "Phoebe, I can get you an interview if you'd like."
"That would be great!" Phoebe said excitedly.
"So how's the dancing going?" Monica asked Joey, changing the subject. "Have I lost my apartment yet?"
"No," he answered. "It's going fine. I have one last practice with him tonight before he goes to the dance."
"You're enjoying it," Rachel noted, watching his face.
"Nooo."
"You are so!"
"So what if Joey is enjoying it?" Chandler asked.
"It's just amusing is all," Monica commented. Joey held his head high as he left to see Treeger.
A Week Later
"Do you think Richard is ever going to propose to Monica?" Rachel asked. She and Ross were getting ready for work.
"I dunno. I mean, they've been together a year just about. Kids are off the table. They love each other. Yea, why hasn't he asked?" Ross mused.
"Maybe he's shy?"
"No. He's probably giving us enough time as newlyweds before popping the question and taking our limelight," Ross answered.
"We have limelight?" Rachel asked, teasing.
"Of course!"
"I love you," she laughed.
"I love you too," he grinned. They kissed.
"No fashion crises today," Rachel prayed to herself as they went out the door.
"I'll send my dinosaur team to help," Ross joked.
"They'd just make it worse," Rachel sighed. "But thank you."
Later-The Perk
"Oh, she's pretty. So, so pretty," Chandler said, flustered. The woman at the table was stunning. He didn't know what to do with himself.
"So ask her out already," Monica laughed.
"Yea, what's the worse that could happen?" Richard asked.
"I could die," Chandler answered. "Burst into flames. Turn into stone. I dunno, you name it."
"Hey guys," Phoebe said. Her voice sounded horrible.
"Aw are you sick?" Monica asked. "Maybe don't play tonight."
"I have to. I'm unemployed. This gig is all I have," Phoebe answered. Needless to say, her interview did not go well with Richard's someone.
"Okay, wish me luck," Chandler said, getting up.
"Good luck!" Richard called. Chandler turned around.
"Wish it," he hissed. Then he turned to the woman.
"How do you think it's going?" Monica asked Richard, watching.
"Seems to be going well," he answered. Chandler and the woman were laughing now.
"I have to get to my catering job," Monica said. "Tell me what happened later."
"Will do," Richard answered, giving her a kiss. Once she was gone, he patted his legs and stood up.
"Going somewhere?" Phoebe asked.
"If you must know, yes," Richard answered vaguely.
"Now I'm intrigued," she said.
"You'll have to stay that way," he winked. He grabbed his coat and left. Phoebe watched, feeling extremely curious.
"Phoebe, you're up," Gunther said.
"Yea, I'll be right back," Phoebe replied. She left her guitar and everything to follow Richard.
The Next Day
"She loves Ernie Cofax! This is unbelievable!" Chandler said excitedly. He listed off all the other things they had in common.
"Chandler loves Kathy!" Phoebe cried. She looked over at Richard and Monica. She knew who else loved someone too.
"Stop!" Chandler said, blushing.
"Look at your face!" Rachel laughed.
"Yea, man, it's pretty obvious you love her," Ross added.
"Have you guys had sex yet?" Joey asked.
"Or did you turn to jelly?" Richard questioned, smirking. Joey high fived him.
"Okay, that was uncalled for," Chandler responded.
"Are you seeing her again?" Monica asked. She didn't know why it was bothering her.
"Yes, in about fifteen minutes," Chandler replied. "So long, children!" He waved as he went out the door.
"It's nice to see him happy like this," Phoebe noted. "Since Janice I mean."
"Yea," Joey echoed. So far they hadn't needed Chandler to lie for them. They hoped it wouldn't happen, but now with Kathy hanging around it was going to be harder to sneak around.
"Well, I have to get to work," Richard sighed, giving Monica a kiss on her forehead. "I'll see you later?"
"Okay," she smiled. She watched Richard leave.
"You're in love," Phoebe commented.
"Of course! He's a perfect man," Monica laughed.
"Have you two..." Rachel started.
"No, not yet," Monica cut her off. "I don't want to freak him out." Phoebe was squirming inside.
"I'm sure he'll get the nerve up soon," Ross teased. Monica swatted him.
"We should get going, honey," Rachel said, standing up.
"See you later, Mon," Ross said, hugging her. They left Phoebe and Monica alone.
"What?" Monica asked, seeing Phoebe's face.
"Nothing," Phoebe replied. She was almost bursting, but she didn't want to ruin anything.
"I think I'm getting your cold," Monica complained.
Later
"Okay," Chandler said, coming into Monica's apartment. "You all win. I'm in love. I love Kathy. There I said it!"
"Good for you," Monica smiled. She checked her watch. Richard was supposed to be there by now. She was growing worried.
"How do I not accidentally blurt that out and scare her away?" Chandler asked. "I suck at serious relationships!"
"Just take it slow," Monica advised absently.
"Time stops with her. That's love, right?"
"Mmhmm."
"Are you okay? You don't seem to be listening to my raving," Chandler noticed.
"I'm just wondering what's keeping Richard is all," she answered.
"I'm sure he just got stuck in traffic," Chandler dismissed. "Anyway..." The phone ringing cut him off. Monica hurried to answer it, thinking it was Richard telling her he was going to be late.
"Hello?"
Chandler started thinking about Kathy again. Her lips were so soft. Her smile was so bright and genuine.
"Yes, this is she..."
He wondered if she liked Baywatch. That would be an awful stretch...
"What?!"
Would it be too soon to ask her for a weekend away?
"Oh my God!"
Chandler's attention snapped back to the present. Monica was clutching the phone, her hand pressed against her mouth.
"Mon?" he asked, moving towards her. She dropped the phone and put both of her hands over her face, sobbing. "Mon?" She didn't answer. Her sobs became howls, and Chandler suddenly became very, very worried.
"Monica?" he asked again, grasping her shoulders. She finally looked at him, trying to choke out the words.
"Richard's dead."
Okay, so I feel the need to justify what I've done here. Monica knows she can't have children, right? So Richard is the perfect man for her, and we all know that Chandler and Monica belong together, so in order for this to happen, Richard had to go. I didn't want him coming back and interfering or making Monica doubt her decision or anything, so this was my solution. FYI, I totally bawled. I'm sorry if I made you cry too. Just so you know, I'm not planning on a lot of angst/sadness in this story, so please don't stop following!
*Revised:
Okay, I need to clarify something. I didn't say that Monica thinks Richard is perfect for her I am saying it appears he is because of the no children thing, that's my own opinion not Monica's. And no, Chandler isn't going to be "second best" and no, I am not just going to have Chandler "jump into a vacated spot" now that Richard is gone. Of course Monica is going to realize on her own that Chandler is perfect for her! I wish I could have had the chance to keep writing my story so you could see that instead of assuming what I'm gonna do cos believe me, you guys have no idea where I'm going with this story lol. Anyway, I felt I needed to straighten that out. Cheers! :)