Hwang Bo Wook

Saturday morning began as it always did: with a single round of morning sex with Soo.

She felt good, but Wook knew there was someone better. He closed his eyes as he kissed his wife, imagining long hair and nails that raked over his back. His Si Yeon was more muscular than the soft, pale exterior of his wife. Si Yeon's lips were fuller and her kisses deeper.

It took all of his control not to moan her name.

Instead, he said his wife's name. "Soo," he groaned, pressing his forehead to hers. She seemed to be responding less than usual. After seven years, he thought he knew all of his wife's reactions, but that day, she seemed different. Her moans were the same as always, but her eyes scrutinized him with a keenness he had never seen during sex. So Wook took positions where Soo could not stare into his soul and closed his eyes.

He released inside her and his little wife's hands curled through his hair. Kissing her again, he tried to quiet the moans that did not belong to whom he imagined. Soo's voice was softer than Si Yeon's.

When he opened his eyes, it was his wife beneath him, her cheeks flushed pink. He kissed the forehead of the woman he loved- of the mother of his darlings.

Leaning close, he pressed his lips to her cheek and chin, moving off of her. Wook wrapped his arms around his wife and held her close. Soo panted beside him and he curled his body around hers. "You're still on birth control, right?" He knew his question was inopportune to ask after sex, but he needed to know. Wook had no plans to have any more children with Soo and they had not used a condom.

She scoffed and Wook frowned when she pushed away from him. "Soo," he called, watching her step out of bed. Her inner thighs were slick with his cum and she walked into the bathroom, slamming the door shut. Wook heard the shower begin to run.

He cleaned himself off with tissues and the makeup removing wipes he found on Soo's vanity. They did the job of making him seem less sweaty and he tossed them into her little trash bin. He dressed in a shirt, sweater, and jeans. Covering his bare feet with socks, he rubbed his face before sitting down at Soo's vanity, heaving a sigh. They had some time before his parents arrived.

Soo stepped out of the bathroom and Wook watched as she dried herself. She pulled her underwear on and stood beside him to access her daily routine. She did not tell him to move so Wook continued to sit, watching his wife as she wiped her face with something clear, patted on something opaque, and dabbed something onto her eyelids.

They both paused when the bedroom door slammed open.

Turning, Wook only caught a glimpse of messy hair before a small blur leaped onto his lap. His arms caught the tiny body that crashed into his as she screamed, "Daddy!" The little girl giggled and butted her head against Wook's stomach, her small hands gripping his sweater.

"Yoon!" He laughed and greeted his daughter. "You're up awfully early."

His youngest beamed and sat back, pointing to Soo. "Mommy's undies," she giggled as Wook kissed the crown of her head.

He felt Soo beside him, her hand on his shoulder. "Good morning, baby," she cooed, kissing Yoon's forehead. "Ready to spend the weekend with Grandma and Grandpa?" Their daughter laughed before bouncing on Wook's lap. Yoon fiddled with her yellow pajamas as Mi barrelled into the room, holding her fist out.

"My tooth!" she shouted.

Wook watched as his oldest collided with Soo's legs before opening her fist and presenting a little white canine. Soo marveled at the tooth, hugging their daughter and peppering her face with kisses. "Look how grown up you are! One more tooth for the birds!"

Wook pulled his girls into his arms and held Soo by the waist, hugging Mi and giving her a kiss. "My baby's all grown up now," he sighed, patting his daughter's hair.

"No, she's not!" Yoon pouted. "I'm grown up too! Me too!"

Laughing, Wook nodded, patting the youngest's back. "You're big too," he assured her.

"We'll throw your tooth onto the roof and then have breakfast," Soo decided. She moved away from his grasp and Wook let her go. "Mommy needs to get dressed if we're going to go outside."

Wook took the children as Soo left to dress. Holding them in his arms, he ignored his assistant and Chae Ryung as they offered the day's mostly blank itinerary. He passed by the bodyguards as they awaited orders and instead took his girls to the sitting room, tossing them onto the sofa and laughing when they squealed in surprise.

He sat down beside them and gently grasped Mi's chin, saying "open," and looking at the gaping hole where her tooth had once been. "How'd it even fall out?" he asked, shifting his shoulders as Yoon climbed on top of them. He let her fall off of him, catching her in his arms and setting the giggling toddler aside.

"I was brushing my teeth and I spitted and there was blood and then I saw my tooth," Mi proudly explained, unwilling to relinquish her baby tooth. Wook nodded and smirked, pulling his daughter onto his lap and hugging her close.

"Well, I'm glad you were able to do it yourself," he said, stroking her hair. He looked at his darling baby girl and wondered how she had grown so much. Wook remembered a time when Mi had been a baby, crawling on top of him and tapping her chubby fists against his chest. "When Daddy was little, Grandma tied my wiggly teeth with a string and then smacked my forehead." He softly tapped Mi's forehead as Yoon continued to wriggle around. "And my tooth fell out."

They watched cartoons until Soo appeared. Dressed in leggings and one of his sweatshirts, he thought she looked especially tiny under the bulk of his clothing. Wook watched as she picked Yoon up and swung their daughter around. "Hwang Bo Yoon! Your sister lost a tooth but you're not allowed to lose any teeth, you hear?" Soo declared, resting Yoon against her hip.

The little girl only giggled and hugged Soo's neck. "Mommy I wanna lost tooth!"

Wook snorted when Soo stuck her tongue out and blew a raspberry at their youngest. "You're not allowed to grow up. Baby Dinosaur has to stay a peanut forever! Yoonie has to be Mommy's little baby forever and ever."

"Am I the only one that's hungry?" Wook asked, feeling his stomach grumble. "Let's throw Mi's tooth onto the roof and eat already."

The girls were the first to dart off towards where they knew Chae Ryung would be, asking for their coats. Wook glanced at Soo as she remained behind. Once the girls were gone, the atmosphere of the room shifted instantly. Smiles faded and past altercations rose once more as the air grew cold. "You never answered my question," he stated.

His wife groaned before throwing her hands up. "I'm still on the fucking pill! Are you happy?" she snapped. Wook narrowed his eyes at her.

"Careful, Soo," he said, standing. He towered over his petite wife; her small form could easily hide behind his body.

But she did not cower beneath him. Instead, she held her chin high and stared up at him. He knew he had liked her spunky defiance, but now, it felt spiteful. "The girls might hear."

"We both know they're out of earshot," she retorted.

They stared each other down and Wook shook his head. "Come on, then. Wouldn't want to miss out on our daughter's milestone." The bodyguards stood by the door as they left the room and Wook moved past them, letting Soo follow behind.

Neither he nor Soo wore coats as they stepped out into the snow with their girls, marring the perfect pillow of frost that had settled overnight.

Crossing his arms against the cold, Wook glanced over at Soo who did the same. He accepted Mi's tooth from her outstretched palm. "Alright, princess," he said, looking down at his daughter. "Make a wish!"

Mi clasped her hands together and murmured something so low that Wook could not hear any of it. Once her wish was complete, Wook chucked the tooth high into the air and watched the tiny speck land on the roof. It disappeared against the dark giwa tiles that lined the two-story house.

"Yay!" Soo cheered, kneeling to give Mi a hug. Wook watched his wife wrap their eldest in her arms and rock her back and forth. "Oh, you're such a big girl now!"

They had breakfast immediately afterwards, moving into the dining room for pastries and fruit. The girls were given mugs of warm milk while Soo had her morning cappuccino. Wook scanned over the more important headlines of the day while eating his breakfast. He glanced up from his newspaper when Yoon complained about her danish being smaller than Mi's.

Sipping his coffee, he let Soo handle the mess their daughter made.

They all paused at the sound of the front door opening. Wook heard the rustle of paper as Soo pushed her plate aside before pulling Yoon into her arms. "I wonder who that could be?" she asked quietly. Their daughter fiddled with Soo's shirt, pulling at the collar and crumpling the cloth in her little hands. The thick material fell past Soo's hips and Wook remembered a time when he thought there was nothing sexier than Soo in his clothing. Now, she just looked weighed down.

"Where are my darling grandbabies?" A voice rang in the hallway and Wook stood as his mother entered the living room. She beamed and he leaned down to kiss her cheek.

"Hello, Mother," he smiled. Wook nodded to his father as well. "Father."

His parents seemed no different than they were last week. Wook watched as his wife awkwardly greeted his mother, accepting a tense hug before being forced to relinquish Yoon to the older woman. "Hello, Yoon!"

"Gramma!" Yoon laughed, holding her hands up. "Mi's tooth falled!"

"Mi lost her tooth?" his mother corrected the toddler. She turned to the firstborn and Wook chuckled when his daughter held his hand. He never knew why she was still shy around her grandmother. Patting Mi's shoulder, Wook smiled down at her.

"She did," he replied, noting how hard Mi clutched at his leg. He wished his baby would be just a little bit braver, but he accepted that she was shy. She was his perfect little girl. There was nothing that could dim the light he saw when he looked at his children.

He watched as Soo greeted his father with a smile. He wondered why, after seven years of marriage, her smiles still seemed so forced. He wrapped an arm around his wife's waist, making sure to only let his hand hover against her skin.

"Oh how wonderful," Wook heard his mother say as she examined Mi's open mouth. When she released his daughter, Wook watched Mi move to hold Soo's hand. His mother handed her coat off to one of the maids and Wook cleared his throat. Before he could offer his parents a seat or breakfast, his mother began to speak. "What are you wearing, dear?" she asked Soo. "Have you run out of clothes? Isn't that Wook's college hoodie?"

Wook felt his wife stiffen beside him, but Soo only shrugged. He knew she was used to his mother's blunt remarks. They were well-meant and he hoped she did not still take them to heart. "I think we all deserve to relax a bit on the weekend," Soo said sweetly. Wook smiled as his mother sniffed and tossed her hair over her shoulder.

It took twenty minutes for Mi and Yoon to get ready for their weekend with their grandparents. Wook stood by as Soo made sure the girls were warmly packed into their parkas and that each had their phone numbers as well as Chae Ryung's work number written on the tag of their jackets. "Got everything?" she asked. The girls nodded and Wook watched Soo kiss their children goodbye. "Be good for Grandma and Grandpa. No fighting. Asleep by bedtime and always remember that safety comes before anything. Don't play too hard."

"Soo, you're smothering them," Wook murmured to his wife. He accepted a kiss from each daughter before patting their heads and sending them off.

And like that, the girls were gone for the weekend. He and Soo would be alone in the house. Wook looked at his wife as his parents' car left the driveway. "I hope they'll be okay," she whispered, her hands pressed to her heart. Wook wondered what she was so nervous about.

"Have some faith in my parents, Soo," he scoffed. "It's not the first time they've had the kids and I'm sure it'll be fine."

They sat together in the sitting room staring at nothing and speaking quietly. Wook could not remember the last time they had had a meaningful conversation. "I had a shitty week at work," he sighed, trying to speak to his wife. He could feel the distance between them growing, but he could not tell why. As far as he knew, she had no idea of his infidelity and they were still happy together. "Bills getting vetoed, Wang Yo going on the news and calling me a liar. As if his policies are any better."

When he closed his eyes, it was not Soo sitting beside him, but someone else. Someone with longer hair and a more assertive voice. Someone who had bested him in debate class and then had sex with him for hours on end.

"My father's angry," Soo murmured. Wook's eyes snapped open and he frowned at his wife as she looked away from him. "He doesn't like that the tax on imports didn't pass."

Sighing, Wook shook his head. "Tell your father I did what I could but was overridden by the president. Nothing I can do about that." He turned towards the woman beside him, gathering her body language. Years of practice had left him with an innate set of skills to weed out liars and, right then, his wife was acting strangely. "Are you alright?" he asked. "You've been acting like I killed someone ever since you got back from the hotel."

Soo only shook her head, her dark hair swinging like a curtain in the wind. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"How about you flinching when I tried to kiss you yesterday."

He stared at his wife as she fiddled with a stray thread on his sweatshirt. "Do you regret our lack of sex?" he asked. "No, that's not it; you were happy to be beneath me this morning. I told you to schedule anything you wanted." He had given her so many options to choose from. If she wanted to go out for a movie, dinner, or anything, he would take her so long as it was scheduled.

"I…" Soo seemed conflicted over her words and Wook slowly blinked as she pressed a hand to her chest again. She was nervous. "I just feel like you're not here anymore. I feel like I don't have you." This again, Wook thought. Hae Soo, I fight politicians for a living and now I have to fight my wife? Where are these outbursts coming from? "I want to spend time with you and I want our marriage to be like when we had Mi. Do you remember how happy we were? We didn't have anyone but ourselves and we were so happy-"

"I wasbreaking my back to work for your father and you want to be like that again?" he asked with a shake of his head. Wook regarded his wife as she held her hand to her heart. "You want to go back to when I was overworked just because we were in our honeymoon phase then?"

"Don't act like it's the worst suggestion," Soo groaned. "We used to be a team. We had Mi and we were learning-"

Wook tilted his head back, exasperated. This was why he did not enjoy speaking with his wife; whenever they did, they fought. "We've already learned how to raise our girls and now they're growing fine. I have an even better job and you're doing well at work. Soo, we have everything and now you want to go back."

Soo remained rooted to her spot as he addressed her with a bewildered expression. Standing, he sighed and pulled at his shirt, trying to cool himself off. Wook knew he could not get angry over every little thing, but Soo's naivete made him want to tear his hair out. "I just wish we loved each other like we did years ago," she pleaded. Wook could not look at his wife.

"Fuck..." he scoffed, pressing his hands over his eyes. Darkness enshrouded him and he stayed that way, unwilling to look at the woman in his company. "When, Soo? When do you want to go back to? When you lost our baby? When I used to cheat?" No, he stopped himself. You're cheating now. Don't remind her about the past.

He turned as the door slammed open, but Soo was already leaving the room. Wook felt his blood boil at the sight of her turning tail. "Leave!" he shouted after his wife. He knew where she was going- where she always went after they fought. "Isn't that what you're good at?! We fight and you go to your little shrines as if something's out there!

"He's dead!" Wook's voice cracked beneath his own raging emotions, and he unwillingly unearthed dead memories that made his chest ache and hands clench. But he could only continue. "He's not coming back! Our baby is buried and he's not coming back!"

He heard a sob from the hallway and Wook fell onto the sofa, holding his head in his hands. His own heart throbbed as he reburied old memories of that baby- the only one that he and Soo had intentionally tried to make. Their little Lily. Their Flower.

The back door slammed so hard that windows around the house rattled.

Wook knew that he was wrong to say those words. He knew she had gone out without a coat. He regretted his actions, but he did not chase after his stubborn wife. Soo would come back when she got cold.

He calmed himself with long breaths and by rubbing his aching temples. He heard the back door open and gently close. That might have been Soo, but he knew she would not return immediately; she was too proud. He assumed it was her bodyguard going to check on her.

Breathing as deeply as he could, Wook steadied himself and knew that he would have to apologize. He had not meant to reopen old wounds. Too used to shouting at political foes, he had crossed a line and he knew that his wife would be in pain. This was his fault.

Wook stood by the back door when the bodyguard managed to convince his wife back inside.

He and Soo met eyes and Wook knew she had been crying. "Soo," he murmured, gazing down at her. There was snow in her hair and her lips were blue, her hands quivering from the cold. He noticed her bodyguard standing behind her like an ominous shadow; an angry guard dog awaiting its master's command. "I'm sorry," he said to her, opening his hands. Wook stepped towards his wife as she wiped her eyes. "I shouldn't have said that to you… I'm sorry."

She let him put his arms around her and Wook held his icy wife as she shivered. He hugged her by the door, pressing his chin to her hair and warming her.

Soo released a shuddering breath and Wook listened when she began to speak. "D-Do you know how much I suffered after we lost our Lily Flower?" she asked, her voice hoarse and quaking from the cold.

"Soo," Wook murmured. He tried to console her, rubbing her arms and warming her. "I kno-"

"I wanted to die," she whispered. Wook paused and looked down at his wife, frowning at her. He knew she had been sad and angry, but not to that extent...

"What are you talking about?"

He felt her wipe her eyes. Soo freed herself from his grasp and Wook stood face-to-face with his wife. Her disheveled hair and too-big sweatshirt made her look tiny and pitiful. "I had to give birth to him. You weren't there. I had to go through all of that pain for there to be nothing at the end. I got to hold our Lily Flower but that was it. He was so beautiful that I thought he was alive."

Wook paused as his wife continued, tears streaming from her eyes. "He looked just like you and for a moment, I was so happy. But then they took him away and didn't bring him back." Soo pressed a hand to her mouth as she cried. "He was so beautiful that I wanted to be with him. I wanted my baby but he was… gone."

He reached to hold her shoulder, but Soo glared at him. Wook stopped at the gleaming betrayal in her eyes. He remembered abandoning his wife after she had called to tell him their baby was dead. Something inside had broken that day, and Wook had gone drinking, unable to wrap his mind around the idea that his child was dead. Nothing had made sense and nothing felt right. He had met one of his old college girlfriends at the bar and she had comforted him in his agony, drinking with him until he could not walk or think or even remember his name. Si Yeon had held him as he cried.

Wook felt his heart sink as his wife stood straighter, looking away from him. She wiped her eyes and breathed deeply, her shoulders shuddering with each inhale. "The only reason I didn't kill myself was because I knew I had another baby to take care of." Wook heard a hardness in his wife's voice that he could not place. She sounded… protective. As if he were a threat to his own child. "I couldn't leave Mi alone. I knew I had to raise her. My second baby was dead, but my first one… she was two and she needed me."

Wook nodded, trying to assuage his guilt. He could not imagine raising Mi on his own- mostly because he knew Soo's parents would have taken her away from him. Five years ago, he would have easily lost any legal battle against his powerful in-laws. Wook felt his annoyance for Soo's family double as he realized her parents might have taken his child from him had Soo committed suicide. "Soo, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said what I said."

"Just admit you hate him," she sighed, wrapping her arms around the place she had carried their children. The sweatshirt crumpled under her grasp and she shook her head. "You stopped loving our Lily Flower, but I never did. I love him just as much as I love Mi and Yoon. He was living inside me. I felt him kicking and I felt his hiccups. I knew he was there."

They stood in silence and Wook closed his eyes. I loved him, he thought. I loved him.

As Soo left him standing by the door, he wondered if his life might have been easier if he married his girlfriend out of college- if he had not broken up with her before going to law school.

In that moment, Wook wished for a simpler life. One without a rich wife and even richer in-laws. He imagined a life where Si Yeon was his children's mother. They would live in a moderate, four bedroom apartment. They would argue over who did the dishes after dinner- not about twisting the president's arm to get a tax passed. They would not have maids, or assistants, or bodyguards prowling around the house.

And most of all, he might have three children instead of two.

Thank you thank you thank you to my amazing beta Krysyuy~~