Chapter 19

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Freyja's POV:

The snows came in the first week of December though thankfully not harshly, the gentle flakes falling from the sky and slowly accumulating upon the land until it looked as if it were covered by a white blanket. The only color remaining in the landscape were the green needles of the tall pine trees, their branches straining slightly under the weight of the new fallen snow. The roof creaked as well from the burden, so much so that I feared it might collapse in on itself. However, Helga reassured me that the oaken house had been through worse winters and survived.

Helga and I were curled up by the central hearth, wrapped in thick fur blankets, seeing as there wasn't much else to do besides hunker down and hope we would survive the next two or three months.

The two milk cows had been brought inside the house, placed in a pen running along the wall at the back of the house, seeing as they would most likely freeze to death if left outside. The sheep, two horses, and the chickens were left outside as they were tougher and able to bear the hardship.

"Oh looks like we're out of water again" Helga sighed, bringing the bucket around to show me.

"I'll get some more. You stay by the fire and keep yourself warm."

"Thank you my dear girl" she sighed with relief, handing the bucket to me. Outside, in the cold of the Northmen winters was not a place for someone Helga's age to be.

Here take these with you" she tossed me a pair of her own gloves as I hoisted my cloak around my shoulders. Helga had made it for me, a beautiful dark green with fur stitched along the edges and behind the head to form a hood.

I glanced at the gloves. They were a bit too large for my own hands but they would have to do.

I opened the door, only to be met with a chilly breeze that felt like I was being pierced by thousands of tiny pins. I quickly shut the door behind me so Helga wouldn't have to feel it. I stood on the porch, gazing around at the snow covered earth and the ships beached at the harbor, where they would most likely remain until spring when someone would have use of them again. A few snow flakes continued to fall, deadening the noise of the wind howling in the background slightly. I wrapped my cloak tighter around me and made my way towards the town well, hoping to get this over with as quickly as possible and be back by the fire in no time.

When I reached the well, I quickly filled the bucket and started back towards the house, my freezing fingers on one hand struggling to hold onto the bucket and those on the other managing to hold my coat closer against the wind that had picked up again.

"Need some help?" Agnarr suddenly approached me, a huge thick fur coat around him and his blond hair allowed to hang down loosely passed his shoulders.

"Yes thank you" I shivered. He took the bucket from me and we began to trudge back towards the house in silence, the snow crunching under our feet.

"You look cold" he commented.

"I'm fine. Thank you."

We took another few steps in silence, neither of us knowing exactly what to say.

"How is Helga?"

"She is well, and she couldn't be more kind to me. I am lucky to have her. Though I'm afraid she finds the winter a little trying, which I suppose is common when one gets older."

"Yes, my uncle was already complaining weeks before the first of the snow reached us, when I went to visit him that is."

"Was that the Jarl of which you spoke of visiting before?"

"No, that was my brother-in-law, Erik*. My Uncle lives with him and his four children, all of them boys."

"Brother-in-law? So does that mean you have a...?"

"Agnarr!" a woman's voice echoed as she came around the corner.

"If I find you've let your nephews escape again I'll..." she stopped talking when she saw the two of us standing together. She was tall like most Northwomen were with platinum blonde hair and a pair of shining blue eyes not quite that different from Agnarr's.

"Who is this?" she asked abrasively.

"Sister, this is Freyja the girl I told you about, Freyja this is my older sister Frida."

It's nice to meet you" I said.

"Polite. I like her already Agnarr. Oh and nice to meet you too" she turned back to addressing me.

Suddenly Bryn and a pack of boys charged past us, yelling and brandishing sticks as if they were weapons and wrestling in the snow.

"Be careful boys. Don't play too roughly with your cousin now" Frida called. I smiled at them warmly, watching them play without a care in the world. They were so innocent, laughing and shoving each around playfully. One of them picked up a snowball and hurled it at the eldest looking boy, starting a chain of snowball assaults throughohut the group.

"How old are they?" I asked Frida.

"Twelve, ten, nine, and seven, and their quite rambunctious."

"I can imagine" I chuckled.

"Yet, I love them all very much. They are my own sons after all." Something cold and hard all of a sudden collided against my neck, water dripping beneath my collar. The boys froze, the eldest coming to the forefront.

"Sorry" he said, worriedly. I gazed at them with a mischevous grin before bending down to the snow and beginning to form a snowball in my hands.

The boy turned and ran, as I tossed it after him. I missed, but then again I never had been a very good thrower.

"Ha! Missed me!" he called over his shoulder.

"That's because I wasn't trying" I teased back, giggling friendlily.

"Uncle Agnarr!" one of the boys called, before tossing one hard into Agnarr's shoulder.

"Oh that's how it is huh?" Agnarr quickly molded one for himself and chased after the boy who was squealing with laughter before being hit square in the back by Agnarr's missile. The too of them collapsed and began wrestling playfully on the ground. The other boys soon joined in, forming a dog pile on top of Agnarr. Agnarr's deep laughter filled the air as he continued to chase his nephews this way and that until they all collapsed on their backs from exhaustion. The boys soon got up and the game progressed but Agnarr remained where he was, lying on his back in the snow. With the wind his cheeks and a carefree smile on his face, it struck me how much he appeared to be a little boy again. It was stark contrast from the stiff formal Agnarr i'd seen at the Thing or at feasts, or the saddened Agnarr who been grieved over the loss of his friend. Frida ran off after her boys, making aure they didn't get themselves into too much trouble, leaving Agnarr and I alone. I stepped over to his side, for once being the one to tower above him.

He grinned up at me.

"Care to join me my lady?"

"Possibly." He held out his hand to me.

"I know that trick." I sat down on my own and lay back in the snow beside him.

"What trick?"

"You know what trick."

He chuckled and we stared in silence at the sky.

"I see you like children."

"Does this surprise you?"

"Perhaps a little. Well, except for Bryn anyway. I've always though that a man like you has to be serious."

He giggled.

We lasped into another contemplative silence, staring at the watery winter sky.

"What was your childhood like Freyja?"

I cringed.

That was definitely not a question I wanted him to be asking.

How could I tell him without giving too much away?

"Like everyone else's I suppose. I laughed and played, occasionally even sang but not really in front of other people."

"What did you sing?"

"Just some songs that my mother taught me."

"Could you sing one now?"

"No I'm afraid I've forgotten the words." The lie stung like a knife to my heart. For some reason that same feeling of wanting to tell him who I was, to let there be no more secrets between us, was back, though I didn't know why. If he found out who I really was, he would be disgusted. He'd laugh at me. He would enslave me, or worse make me his concumbine. He would crush me under his foot. The only reason he treated me well was because he thought I was one of them. Yet a worm of doubt had begun to sow itself in my heart. What if maybe, just maybe, he would accept me as I am? No, I couldn't afford to hope. Thinking like that would only get me killed.

"Freyja are you alright?" Agnarr's voice drew me back to the present and I realized I'd been silently staring at him.

"Sorry I was thinking is all." I turned my face back towards the sky. Agnarr looked as if he were about to say something but then decided against it.

"Uncle, what are you doing?" the youngest of his nephews suddenly appeared, looking at us with a mix of curiosity and confusion.

"Enjoying the sky."

"Would you like to join us?" I moved over so there was an open space between Agnarr and I. The little boy plopped himself down and turned his big, soulful brown eyes towards me.

What's your name?"

"Freyja. What's yours?"

"Alvis, but you can call me Alvi, everyone does."

"Well, it is nice to meet you Alvi." We settled into a comtemplative silence that lasted all but two seconds before Alvi spoke up.

"What are we looking for?"

"Well, we could look for clouds. Like, see that one looks like a rabbit" I pointed to a cloud in the sky.

"That one looks like an eagle" Alvi pointed out.

"I see a wolf" Agnarr chimed in.

"Alvi!" We sat up to see the eldest of the boys scampering towards us.

"What are you doing?" Alvi flipped onto his stomach so he could face his brother.

"We're looking at clouds."

"Alright boys, time to go back inside" Frida commanded.

"Awwww!" they groaned in unison.

As they headed back down the village street towards home Agnarr and I dusted ourselves off from any remaining snow.

"Thank you for spending time with Alvi, Freyja."

"Your welcome. He seems like a very kind boy."

Frida gave me one last smile before she turned to her brother.

"We should be getting home now, it's getting late."

"Perhaps you and Helga would like to join us for dinner Freyja?"

Frida's eyes suddenly flashed with irritation which quickly smoothed back over into politeness so quick it was hard to believe it was even there in the first place.

I'm sure we wouldn't want to trouble them dear brother." It was clear she didn't want me joining them. Why?

"Also remember our cousin Aslaug is arriving today as well. I'm sure she'd like a chance to catch up after not having seen you for so long."

"Oh yes Aslaug** I forgot." Agnarr looked as if he could care less about spending time with his cousin, but he kept his tone polite.

"Nice to meet you Freyja" she said, somewhat dismissively before practically dragging her brother back down the street.

I was left alone on the snow and mus covered road. I sighed and picking up my bucket, now filled to the brim with fresh water, I made my way into the house.

###

The next few weeks passed with no sign of Agnarr. I figured this was because his visiting family had commandeered his every moment. Then again, who could blame them I guess with the time spent was something unnerving about Frida that I couldn't quite place my finger on. Perhaps she improved upon closer aquaintance and just had difficulty meeting people for the first time. December bled into January and then to February, which among the Northmen was known as the starving month, when the winter supplies would be running short after a long winter, and consequently rations would get smaller as no one wanted to be empty-handed before spring came once again.

"Freyja!" Helga called.

"Back here!" I shouted, hanging another piece of laundry over a rope suspended inside.

"Ah there you are. I need you to do me a favor?"

"What is it?"

"I've had a troubling headache for the past few days. I was wondering if you could run to the healer's farmstead just outside of town and collect some of the herbs there?"

"Is it far?"

"No just follow the path out of town and then take a right at the fork in the road. It'll be on the left side. You can't miss it."

"May I take one of the horses?"

"Of course, but ride slowly. There could still be ice out there and both of you could end up falling if you rush."

Don't worry. I'll be careful."

I hurried to the barn and saddled Dagrun. The horse whinnied in protest as I pulled her away from her hay munching to place the bit in her mouth.

I mounted her and with a squeeze of my heels we were off at a steady walk. I wouldn't risk going any faster, since I promised to follow Helga's advice. It was slosgoing but it was better than injuring Dagrun or myself, besides it gave me a wonderful opportunity to gaze upon my surroundings.

The green needled branches of several of the trees still remained covered in snow, the sunlight glinting off the white surface and making it appear to shimmer and sparkle.

"Enjoying the view" a voice suddenly startled me. I whipped around to see Agnarr just up the path, on horseback himself.

"You startled me."

"Hardly my intention." He moved up beside me, his horse facing the other direction from mine.

"Where you off to?"

"The healer's. Helga needs some herbs for her headache."

"Want some company along the way?"

"Oh I wouldn't wish to keep you."

"Don't worry. I've got all the time in the world" he replied, turning his horse in a circle so this time it's head was facing the same direction as my own mount's.

"Shall we?" he indicated forward.

"Sure."

The first few steps or so were in silence until Agnarr broke the quiet.

"It's nice to see you again Freyja. Please accept my apologies that I haven't been able to come around. My nephews and the rest of the family decided to spring the news that they were staying for the whole winter on me at the last minute. It's been quite chaotic in my home ever since."

"It's alright you need not fill obligated to see that I am well. You've held up the end of your oath. I have a home. I'm under your protection. It would be presumptuous of me to expect anything more from you."

"Still, I was glad to do it."

He grinned at me one sidedly and a sparkle of humor and interest was in his eyes. It was in that moment that at least part of what Helga had ascertained was true. Agnarr wanted me, for reasons still yet unknown, but the desire was there, burning like a fire in the night.

"Why?" I found myself asking.

"Pardon?" he asked.

"Why did you like to come see me?"

"You're intellgient, fun, beautiful, interesting, brave, loyal, shall I go on?"

"Why are you complimenting me?!" I snapped beginning to feel irritated. Agnarr stopped at the sudden change in my tone.

"Freyja what's wrong?"

"What's wrong is you refuse to tell me your intentions, probably because you're thinking of using me until you find someone who has an equal amount of money and wealth in their pocket!"

"I would never use a woman in such a dishonorable way. I would never even touch you unless you wanted me to."

"Then what is it you want from me?"

"I'll show you want." He got down off the horse and came over to me.

"Come down."

"Why?"

"So I can show you what I want." For some reason curiosity overcame caution as he helped me down fron the horse. Then before I knew he took my hand.

"Freyja Magnisdottir what I want is for you to be my wife. Will you marry me?"

(The Old Norse spelling of this name, Erik or Eric is Erikr, but for the sake of simplification and clarity I will be using the later version.* This name is pronounced As-lau with the g being silent.**)