December 2000

"It's almost Christmas!" Ben exclaimed, jumping up and down. Rachel was trying to feed Daniel. They were slowly starting him on solid foods. He seemed to like banana flavored items the most. He also enjoyed throwing what he could get a hold of.

"You got a little..." Ross started, reaching to wipe off the baby food from Rachel's cheek.

"Thanks," she replied. She was still breast feeding him as well. Her doctor had said they could do both.

"Santa will know where to find me, right?" Ben asked, still talking about Christmas.

"He will," Rachel promised. Ross looked a little disgruntled about something, and Rachel wondered what was wrong.

"Let's get you ready for school," Ross said then, picking up Ben's backpack.

"Bye, Danny," Ben said, kissing his brother's cheek. "Bye, Momma R."

Rachel always smiled at this. He already had two mothers. He had come up with Momma R because it made things less confusing.

"Have a good day," she called after them. When she turned back to Daniel, he chucked another bit of food at her face. She sighed but laughed at the same time. He was too cute to be annoyed at.

Later-Monica's Apartment

She was rushing around and trying to get things done when Chandler came in and saw the mess.

"Are you doing another bake-ethon of cookies?" he asked, worried.

"Nope," she shook her head. "Candy."

"Candy?"

"I want the neighbors to like me."

"Why?"

"Because I need to be liked, Chandler. Have you not learned that about me?" she asked, annoyed.

"Right," he nodded.

"I also want to get to know our neighbors," she went on as she put her candy into a basket. Chandler reached for one, and she slapped his hand away.

"I'm technically your neighbor," he accused. "Therefore, I'm allowed candy."

"You're my roommate, or have you changed your mind on that?" Monica asked.

"I'm working on it," he said.

"Half of your things are still in your apartment," she said. "Are you changing your mind about moving in?"

"No! I'm just horribly lazy," he corrected. "I'll work on it."

"What is going on in here?" Joey asked, his eyes lighting up at the sight of candy. He stole one before Monica had the chance to hit him.

"Neighbor Candy," Chandler answered.

"I've seen Smokes A Lot Lady sucking on candy," Joey nodded. "The Kids I've Seen would probably enjoy it too."

"This is why we need to get to know our neighbors," Monica pointed out.

"I'm not sure about The Red-Haired Guy Who Doesn't Like to Be Called Rusty," Joey mused. "He seems cranky on a good day."

"Hey!" Phoebe called from the hallway. "Joseph Francis Tribbiani! Are you gonna help me or stuff your face?"

"Coming!" Joey yelped, rushing out. He picked up the other end of the box Phoebe had been dragging behind her.

"See? They know how to move," Monica pointed out.

"Hint taken," Chandler nodded, going back to his apartment. He wondered if Phoebe would let him have the box for his things.

Hours Later

"There," Chandler said, putting his last shirt up in the closet. Monica was supervising. "I'm all moved in."

"I was beginning to worry that you were backing out," she commented.

"Because it took me over a week to move in?"

"A girl worries about things," Monica shrugged. "And it was almost two weeks."

"I would never back out from being with you," Chandler said, putting his arms around her. "I've wanted this for far too long."

"Me too."

They were kissing when they heard noises at the door. Monica perked up, excited to think that someone was eating her candy. She hurried to check with Chandler on her heels. The hallway was empty when she opened the door, as was her basket.

"Oh my God! They're gone!" she cried. "People liked them!"

"Or..." Chandler gestured towards Joey's door.

"Crap," Monica groaned. She went over and flung it open, finding Joey and Phoebe sitting among a pile of boxes. Joey had a bowl on his head and a sheet around him. He was also holding onto a lamppost.

"Whatcha doing, Joe?" Chandler asked.

"I'm cutting his hair," Phoebe answered, showing him the scissors. "Then he said he felt like a king, and...well...it kind of went from there."

"Did you eat all my candy?" Monica asked, getting to the point. She didn't want to hear any weird king and queen sexual innuendos that might come flying out of Phoebe's mouth.

"That was my plan to make you think everyone liked it," Joey said. "But by the time I got there, there were only two pieces left."

"Wow! They really liked it!" Monica exclaimed. "I gotta make more!" She turned and rushed back over to her apartment, leaving Chandler standing there.

"You sure?" he asked.

"Positive," Joey answered.

"You're not just saying it to make her feel better?"

"No..."

"I sense a lot of baking in my future," Chandler sighed, going over to join Monica.

Ross & Rachel

"Are you okay?" Rachel asked as they got ready for bed. Daniel and Ben were both asleep.

"I've just been thinking about Ben and Christmas," Ross said. "I mean, he's half Jewish, and I don't think he knows anything about Hanukkah."

"Then you should tell him about it," Rachel suggested.

"I want to. I'm just not sure how to start."

"Start by saying, 'Hey, Ben! What do you know about Hanukkah?'" Rachel said, mimicking Ross's voice.

"I do not sound like that," he huffed.

"Close enough," she dismissed. "It's really not that hard, Ross. Just bring it up."

"You're right," he nodded. "Just bring it up."

Rachel planted a kiss on him before turning over onto her side and getting comfortable in the bed. Ross sat up thinking for a bit longer before joining her.

A Few Days Later

"Oh my God!" Chandler exclaimed, pushing his way through the crowd that was gathered in front of Monica's apartment door. Well, it was his door now too. He kept forgetting.

"We want candy! We want candy!" everyone was chanting. Chandler pushed past Smokes A Lot Lady, and for whatever reason, he grabbed her cigarette and sucked on it. He figured he needed the boost to deal with this issue.

"Monica?" he called, shoving the door shut behind him as people tried to keep it open. He smacked one's hand with his own, who was trying to grab at his butt.

"This is insane!" she cried, standing there covered in ingredients and openly crying.

"Do you see what happens when people like you? They won't leave you alone," he pointed out.

"Can you make it stop?" she asked tearfully. Chandler knew he had to be braver than he was the other night when someone pounded on the door at four a.m. looking for candy. He could do it. It wasn't hard.

"I will make it stop," he promised. Then he turned to whip open the door and confront all the people. "Hey!"

They stopped chattering, listening eagerly. Some even held out their hands expectantly, Joey being one of them.

"Will you look at what you've done to this poor woman?!" Chandler started. "All she wanted to do was something nice for our neighbors, and you've turned it into running with the bulls!"

"But it's so good! We need it!" one cried.

"Enough is enough!" Chandler shouted. "No more candy! You've ruined it!" They all started to shout in protest, and Joey surged forward and into the apartment.

"Yea! You ruined everything!" he yelled back at them just before Chandler slammed the door and locked it. Joey went over to the candy basket and helped himself.

"Thank you," Monica said. "I'm sorry. I won't do anything like this again."

"It's all right," he assured her. "You just wanted to do something nice. Don't ever stop doing nice things just because some people get mean or nasty about it."

"You're so wonderful," she smiled.

"I try," he smiled back as she kissed him.

"Did you smoke?" she asked, sniffing his breath.

"Um, no. Smokes A Lot was out there and blew it right into my mouth," Chandler lied. She gave him a questioning look but didn't press.

"You were right. It was more to get people to like me," she admitted, moving on. "But they got nasty. Someone even put a threatening note under the door." She showed Chandler, who looked at it.

"My bad," Joey said, snatching it. "Mob mentality, you know? Sorry."

"Get out," Chandler ordered.

"I can't go back out there! I can't outrun the bulls," Joey started, but Chandler grabbed his collar. Joey snagged the basket of candy before Chandler hustled him out the door.

"He's got the candy!" Chandler shouted to the receding backs of their neighbors, who instantly turned and rushed Joey. Joey began to shriek, but Chandler was back inside before seeing them all pile onto Joey, fighting to get the pieces of candy out of his hands.

A Week Later

Ross went into Monica's apartment to find Phoebe standing next to a skull on the table and Chandler and Monica staring at her as though she had lost her mind. He chose to ignore all of this. Rachel came in behind him with Daniel. Ben was at Carol's for the week, but they were picking him up that night and had him for Christmas.

"I get Ben for Christmas," he said gleefully, going to sit at the table. Rachel eyed the skull and then Phoebe.

"Honey? What's that?" she asked.

"Oh, it's my mom's," Phoebe answered. Rachel recoiled, backing into the cupboards and shielding Daniel from the horror.

"What?!" she shrieked.

"Not my mom's actual skull," Phoebe said logically. "It was something she had that she put out at Christmas to show that death still occurred. It's also a good candy bowl."

"That is so gross," Rachel gasped as Phoebe plucked candy out of it and ate it.

"I should have put that out for the neighbors with my candy in it," Monica gestured to Chandler. "Maybe they wouldn't have been so eager to take it all."

"Anyway," Ross said loudly, moving on. "I want to teach him about Hanukkah."

"If you're gonna do that, can I teach him about how death still happens at Christmas?" Phoebe asked hopefully.

"Maybe we should teach Ben about his eccentric Aunt Phoebe," Rachel suggested.

"Next time, Phoebs," Ross promised with absolutely no intention of keeping it.

"You and Joey moved back into Joey's apartment?" Rachel asked, changing the subject.

"Yup! My apartment is fixed up now. I'm going to let Denise move back in and stay there," Phoebe answered.

"Denise?" Monica asked.

"My old roommate! Geez, I only talked about her like all the time," Phoebe huffed.

"Right," Monica said hastily. "Denise." She shared a look with Chandler that conveyed she had no idea who Phoebe was talking about.

"I'm going to bring Ben by later," Ross said to Monica then. "Tomorrow."

"Okay, sounds good."

"I have to get to work now," Ross went on.

"Candy for the road?" Phoebe offered. Ross hesitated for a moment before shrugging and reaching to grab a piece and leaving. Rachel walked the edge of the room towards the door, staying as far away from the skull as possible before exiting.

The Next Day

Monica did not know what to think when Ross appeared in her apartment wearing an armadillo costume. Ben was just as equally confused. Monica knew Ross had difficulty getting Ben to pay attention to him talking about Hanukkah, but she felt the costume was a bit much.

"Hello!" Ross said. "I'm the Holiday Armadillo! Santa sent me to wish you a Merry Christmas!" He pointed to Ben.

"What happened to Santa?" Ben asked.

"Oh, he wasn't available this close to Christmas, you see," Ross said. Monica understood what he was saying.

"Long journey for you, coming from, uh, Texas," she commented.

"Wow! That's far away!" Ben cried.

"Yup. I brought your presents too," Ross said. He grunted, trying to pick them up, but once he had set them down, he couldn't reach them again.

"I got it," Monica said, picking them up. They moved to the living room where she and Ben sat down on the couch side by side, and she handed him his gifts.

"Thank you!" Ben said happily.

"You're welcome. Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah," Ross said.

"You celebrate Hanukkah too?" Ben asked.

"Why, yes! I can tell you all about it," Ross promised. He just got started when Chandler flung open the door wearing a Santa suit, and he got Ben all excited about it, making him forget about Ross. Monica played referee and told Ben to open his presents while she had a conference with Santa and the Armadillo, which she had never thought she'd have to do in her lifetime.

"Dude, you're ruining this," Ross hissed.

"You said you couldn't find a Santa suit, so I borrowed this from a guy at work," Chandler said.

"Thank you, but I've got him interested in Hanukkah finally, and you're killing it."

"All right, all right, I'll go."

"Keep the suit," Monica chimed in, making Chandler look at her.

"Seriously?"

"Yea...is that weird?"

"Only if your father didn't dress up as Santa."

"He didn't."

"Then we're all good," Chandler grinned.

Ross tried to get back to his speech with Ben, but Ben was upset that Santa was leaving, so Chandler had to make the ultimate sacrifice (and it really was a sacrifice...he hated listening to Ross's speeches) and stay and listen to Ross talk about Hanukkah. Ross had just started again when Phoebe arrived dressed as the Grim Reaper.

"Oh my God," Monica said, shocked.

"What the hell are you doing?" Ross hissed as he rushed to her.

"Someone has to teach him about death," she insisted.

"Get out," Ross growled.

"What is that?" Ben asked, his voice a little scared sounding.

"Someone has a late Halloween Party down the hall," Monica answered quickly. "They apparently lost track of what month it was." She glared at Phoebe, who just bowed and backed out of the door.

"Okay," Ross said, going back. "I think we're good, right? No more surprises?"

That's when Joey arrived as Superman, making Ross want to kill him.

Rachel & Phoebe

She knew Ross was at Monica's talking to Ben about Hanukkah. She went into Phoebe and Joey's apartment to kill time there before Ross was finished. She found a Grim Reaper sitting at the counter when she opened the door.

"Oh my God!" she shrieked, clutching her chest.

"Death isn't that scary," Phoebe commented, taking off her mask.

"It is when you don't expect it," Rachel retorted. She finished coming in, pulling her stroller after her. She noticed Phoebe had been crying then. "What's wrong?"

"I just...I miss Mom," Phoebe answered.

"Aw, honey, you can call her. She's just in Montauk."

"Not her. My other mom."

"Oh." Rachel felt stupid then.

"I used to try so hard every year to make Christmas happy for her," Phoebe said. "It never worked."

Rachel went over to her friend and put her arms around her, letting Phoebe rest her head on her shoulder.

"It wasn't your fault," Rachel assured her.

"I know that now, but back then, I felt if I had just tried harder, she would have been happier."

"Depression is a hard thing to help, especially when you're just a kid," Rachel told her.

"She did do this one thing every New Year's Eve no matter what," Phoebe went on.

"What's that?"

"She made us say what our favorite memory of the year was. Hers was always the same."

"What was that?"

"Talking about our favorite memories of the year," Phoebe answered. Rachel hugged her friend harder then. She knew one day she would lose her mother, but she knew it probably wouldn't be in the way Phoebe had lost hers. The door opened then, and Joey came in dressed as Superman.

"What's wrong?" he asked, seeing them.

"Nothing," Phoebe answered, wiping at her eyes. "Why are you Superman?"

"It seemed fun," Joey answered, shrugging.

"Are they finished over there?" Rachel asked.

"Yea."

"Thanks," Rachel said. She looked at Phoebe. "I'm always here to talk to."

"Thank you."

Rachel left with Daniel then, and Joey went to hug Phoebe because even though she said nothing was wrong, he knew she was upset about something. He didn't pry. He just let her know that he was there for her.

January 2001

"You have got to stop," Ross ordered as Monica glowered at their cousin Frannie, who was making her rounds with her new husband at the reception.

"I can't believe she didn't invite me," she said. "We were inseparable!"

"For two years," Ross reminded her. "A lot changes from when you are nine years old."

Monica didn't say anything else. She knew she owed Rachel for making her miss this wedding. She had wheedled and begged until Ross had finally caved and took her as his date. He was currently avoiding their aunt Millie. He couldn't stand her always kissing him on the lips. It grossed him out.

"So how did you know the happy couple?" Monica asked the woman sitting beside her.

"I used to work with her."

"Used to? I'm her blood relative, and she didn't invite me. Blood," Monica repeated.

"Stop saying blood to everyone," Ross chastised. "You're making yourself look weird."

Monica just rolled her eyes. She was grateful Chandler wasn't there. She didn't need him seeing her like this. When she finally spied Frannie, she hauled Ross over to her.

"Don't ambush her," Ross hissed.

"I won't," Monica hissed back. "Hi, Frannie!"

Frannie turned and looked shocked to see her there.

"Monica! What...?"

"Am I doing here?" Monica asked. "Ross brought me. I beat you at your own game. Ha! But tell me, we're family and we were so close at one time. Why didn't you invite me? What have I ever done to you?"

The groom turned at this point, seeing Monica.

"Stuart," Monica said, bowled over.

"You know my husband," Frannie said, giving her a look.

"So it's who you did, not what you did," Ross commented. Monica elbowed her brother hard in the ribs, making him grunt in pain.

"Congratulations," Monica said, embarrassed. She quickly went back to her table, extra glad that Chandler wasn't there to see this.

Chandler & Rachel

Rachel had nowhere else to be. She hadn't gone to the wedding with Ross, but Carol still offered to babysit anyway to give her a night off. She found herself at Monica's apartment because she didn't know what else to do with her time, and she had a feeling there was another delicious cheesecake there like the one she'd caught Chandler eating a few days ago. It had become their secret.

"What is that?" Rachel asked, coming into the apartment. Chandler tried to move and hide the box, but he had failed.

"Uh uh," he shook his head.

"Are you eating cheesecake?" she demanded.

"Uh uh," he said again, muffled.

"I will give you a hundred dollars to whistle right now," she said. Chandler did his best, and cheesecake flew everywhere. "Chandler!"

"I couldn't help it! I got another one, and...it just called to me," Chandler said. It had been an accident, the first one. The second one he had left at Mrs. Braverman's door, but the woman didn't pick it up, so he took it back. This third one...he just couldn't deny he was a cheesecake thief anymore.

"Give me my half," Rachel ordered.

"No."

"I'll tell Monica how you call her cheesecake dry and mealy," she threatened.

"Get a knife and plate," Chandler directed. She did so and went back to the table to cut it in half. She gave herself the biggest piece of course.

"No switching or sharing, and don't cry to me when you eat yours first and have nothing left," Rachel said, moving to sit on the couch. Her foot snagged the corner of the rug, though, and she dropped the plate. The cheesecake landed face down on the rug.

"Oh, no," she said. Monica was going to murder her.

"Ha, ha, ha," Chandler crowed, coming up behind her with his cheesecake piece still on the cardboard platter it came on.

"Give me some of yours," she demanded.

"No, no! You said no sharing or switching and no crying when yours is gone," Chandler repeated. Rachel smacked his platter out of his hand, and it hit the floor hard.

"What was that for?!"

"Because you're mean," Rachel answered. Then she got down onto her knees and began eating the pieces of cheesecake that weren't touching the floor. Chandler soon joined her.

"Stay in your zone," she said bossily as his fork edged over into her territory.

"Hey, guys," Joey said, coming in then. He stood in the kitchen, and Rachel and Chandler both looked at him.

"What's wrong?" Rachel asked, seeing his face.

"I think Phoebe cheated on me," he answered. Rachel was immediately on her feet with Chandler right behind her.

"Oh my God, what?" Rachel asked, grabbing Joey's arm. "What are you talking about?"

"I saw her," Joey said. "She was supposed to meet me for dinner, but she blew me off. Then I got a call from a buddy saying he saw her down with some dude in a restaurant."

"Oh no," Chandler said, his heart gripped with fear. Phoebe wouldn't have cheated, would she have? He had been so sure she loved Joey. No, he knew she loved Joey. She had for a long time.

"Sweetie, maybe it was just a friend or a relative. Maybe Frank Jr. was in town!" Rachel said, frantic.

"I went to see for myself," Joey said, shaking his head. "It was David."

Rachel and Chandler were stunned. What was Phoebe doing with David? And why hadn't she told Joey?

The room was filled with dread.

Phoebe

It had been surreal, seeing David again. He was supposed to be in Russia, yet there he had stood in Central Perk, waiting to see her. She knew it was foolish to have dinner with him without telling Joey. She didn't know what had come over her.

"You're keeping well?" he had asked.

"Yes. I'm getting married," she had answered. The surprise on his face was huge.

"Wow. Congratulations."

"Thank you."

The rest of their dinner had been awkward with small talk and niceties. She had missed seeing Joey standing there watching them. She had wished she hadn't bothered going with David at all. He was an old flame who had broken her heart by leaving, and then she had gotten feelings for Joey. There was no future with David, only Joey.

As she walked home now, she kicked herself for not just saying no to David, but a part of her had wanted him to know she had moved on, had wanted him to hurt for hurting her. It was petty and stupid, but she felt good knowing that David knew she was happy with someone else.

"Hey," she said, going into the apartment and seeing Joey standing there.

"Why?" he asked.

"What?"

"Why did you do it?"

"Do what?" Phoebe asked, confused.

"Sleep with David!"

"Whoa, what?!" Phoebe exclaimed.

"I saw you at dinner!"

"So that means I slept with him?" Phoebe asked, outraged.

"Dinner usually means sex," Joey argued, crossing his arms.

"Not for everyone, Joey," Phoebe countered. "Oh my God, I can't believe you think I cheated!"

"Why else would you meet David for dinner?"

"Because he asked. Because I didn't want to be rude? I don't know," Phoebe answered. She didn't know how to explain the other reasons without looking ridiculous.

"I'm going to ask you to sleep somewhere else tonight," Joey said.

"What? Joey, you're blowing this way out of proportion!"

"Do you, or do you not, still have feelings for him?"

"I don't! Joey, I love you," Phoebe said urgently.

Joey felt his old fear and insecurities resurface. He had been cheated on before, so when he felt the slightest sense it was happening again, he panicked.

"Just...go," he said, turning and going into their room, shutting the door behind him firmly. Phoebe stood there, shocked. Then she went over to Monica and Chandler's.

Monica & Chandler

Monica came in late, her shoes in her hand. She had tolerated the rest of the night because she had made Ross take her after all. She had missed Chandler the whole time.

"Hey," he said now, coming to greet her quietly. "I have news."

"What news? This sound serious," Monica said.

"Phoebe is in the guest room."

"What? Why?"

"Joey thinks she cheated on him because she had dinner with David," Chandler explained.

"David?! What?"

"Shhh," Chandler urged. "She's really torn up about it. He doesn't believe nothing happened. He wants her to stay here for a bit."

"Oh my God. They can't break up," Monica moaned. "They just can't."

"They won't," Chandler assured her. "Not if I have anything to say about it. This is just a misunderstanding. Joey will come around."

"Poor Phoebe," Monica whispered. "And Joey. This is silly." They walked quietly to their room now.

"How was the wedding?" Chandler asked as she changed into her pajamas.

"Stupid. Pointless," Monica answered.

"Ah, the essence a wedding is supposed to give," Chandler commented sarcastically.

"She married one of my exes," Monica sighed. "That's why she didn't invite me."

"Oh nooo," Chandler said, a laugh about to burst out of him. The glare she gave him cut it short. "I'm sorry?"

"It was embarrassing. I'm glad you didn't witness it."

"I'm sure we would have had a good night regardless," Chandler promised. "In fact, I can still make it a good night."

"Monica? Is that you?" Phoebe called.

"Later," Monica promised him, giving him a kiss. She went to console her friend. She hoped Chandler was right, that this would all blow over quickly.

It just had to.

Before you get mad at me, please read the next chapter :) Thank you!