- K -

Curling his fingers around the hem of Sakura's shirt, Kakashi bent to meet her eyes and silently ask for permission to remove her bloodied clothes. A small, almost undetectable nod allowed him to begin pulling the top off. The blood from her injury remained crusted onto her abdomen – the only sign the injury had been there. However, the blood drew his eyes to the nearby scar that marred her skin. Now white from being years old, the scar Sasori had left was the largest of the injuries he'd seen on her. Are there more I haven't seen?

"This is from when you killed Sasori?" More of a statement than a question.

A nod. "Chiyo-sama helped."

"You were protecting her when he injured you," Kakashi clarified.

"Aa."

Kakashi 's expression pulled back in frustration at her lack of response and use of his own deflecting term. "You need to learn self preservation."

A huff escaped Sakura, but she didn't respond to him verbally. Physically, however, her body sagged and her head lurched forward leaving her forehead pressed against his chest. The soft exhales of breath onto his shirt made him tense, but he ignored the discomfort.

"One of these days you're going to take a risk and it won't end up well, you're not going to walk back through the gates like every other time. You have the idea in your head that things will always turn out okay." No response met his criticism, though it wasn't as much of a criticism as much as it was a warning or even…a plea?

Kakashi found himself reaching for the hem of his own shirt to pull it up and over his head. The movement jostled her forehead and she leaned back to lay her body over the counter and lean the back of her head against the mirror.

Kakashi stripped off his pants and then reached for her medic skirt while glancing at her eyes for any sign she wanted him to stop. A small nod was again his response as he continued to undress her. Bloodied, sweat soaked clothes fell away until she was only in black panties and her bindings on the counter. Distant eyes met his and it felt like she wasn't in the same world as him.

"I'm going to get you in the shower." She gave another nod. Holding out his hands, he helped her slide off the counter with shaky legs to support her. Stepping backwards, he retained his grip on her hands as he guided her into the shower.

Crying, yelling, anything would have been easier to handle than the catatonic state Sakura was in. Unable to read her mind and understand what exactly was going on in her head, he was forced to work with what little information he had. Clearly she was distraught about Tanzawa, but there were so many problems related to the man and there was no telling what specifically had set her off. Maybe it's the culmination of everything?

"Can you take off your bindings?"

A nod.

Realization hit him suddenly that he was about to be naked with Sakura, alone in her house. The gravity of the situation didn't escape him, but he couldn't help the reemerging sexual attraction towards the pinkette. He crushed it with fury at himself for allowing such weakness.

By the time he had recovered from his shaken mentality, she was entirely naked before him and he attempted to distract himself by stripping away the last of his clothes as he turned the water on and moved behind her to allow the spray to wash over her.

Not having her eyes watching his every move allowed him the luxury of really looking at Sakura for the first time. Hard work and intense training left her with a lithe but well muscled build. She retained the tiny frame she'd always had, but it seemed not an inch was wasted with anything but snow white skin covering coiled muscle. Small scars littered her body similar to all ninja, but a scar on her lower back caught his attention.

Reaching out hesitantly, his fingertips brushed against a large scar that matched the one on the front of her body. White like the other side indicating an old scar, it too was rough and clearly healed haphazardly – likely during a battle. Sakura flinched slightly under his touch, but he didn't pull away instead opting to flatten his palm over the scar. It disappeared below his large hand before he slid the hand around her body to brush the scar on her front.

"What happened?" he found his voice asking without his mind's permission.

"The sword went clean through."

Rage boiled under his skin at the image flashing through his mind of Sasori thrusting a sword right through the woman in his touch. "It's not as clean of a scar as others."

"It was poisoned, harder to heal." Sakura's sentences were still clipped but talking about things other than the recent mission seemed to draw her from her reverie. "I thought I might die. I thought of Team 7, that I wouldn't get to see us all reunite. I thought of all the research I'd leave incomplete and how angry Tsunade would be that I let myself die."

She didn't even fear for herself, she feared for others.

He slid his palm around her body to glide up to her right shoulder where a jagged scar was – still pink showing it was relatively new. Squinting, he looked closely trying to discern what it was since it appeared to be partially healed. "Is this from your mission?" He knew he shouldn't ask and shouldn't push her, but he was losing his patience with watching her battle an invisible attacker.

Momentarily tensing, her shoulder blade jerked from his reach. The distance between didn't last long as she suddenly fell totally slack again. Shuffling backwards, she pressed her back against his front and leaned on him as if she was absorbing his strength through contact. Something in him shifted as he confirmed it was likely a remnant of her torture.

Kakashi's hands rose to her scalp and he began to massage the blood and grime from her dirtied pink locks. Touching her was gentle. Sakura gave him a context and person with which he could completely relax. With which he could allow himself to analyze his feelings. Naruto and Sasuke were his students and, while he felt he had failed them in many ways, they would never lose a place in his life. Asuma had been a close friend while Kurenai, Anko, Ibiki, and Genma remained good friends – though a good friend didn't mean someone he let into his life necessarily.

But he knew he didn't feel for anyone else what he felt for Sakura.

There was no one else he'd be so patient with, no one else he'd let himself be touched by, no one he'd let out whispers of his past to. It was a terrifying thing to realize that someone had created such a profound impact upon him without him even realizing it. Every day at the training field, every mission, every night she needed him, they all culminated into the feelings he only knew how to express through his gentle touches in this moment.

Holding her at an arm's length had failed, pretty spectacularly since he was showering her after a mission, and there was no discernable point when things had changes. They just…had.

Her neck came into view as she leaned back into his touch. Rushing water was the only sound in the room as he went through the process of cleaning the blood off of her and washing her hair with careful fingers – as if he would break her with too much force.

"You're more stubborn than I am."

As with countless times before in Kakashi's life, he was the catalyst for Sakura's tears. However, this was the first time he had desperately hoped he would make her cry. That his words could be the tipping point to allow her to release the turmoil she was trying so hard to mask. Kakashi didn't know if she read "underneath the underneath" of his words, though the words had transformed in its meaning over the years.

First, there was being irritated at her for having to deal with an overly girly young genin while also balancing two of the most complex students in their entire class.

Second, there was exhaustion at the extra work he felt compelled to put in to ensure she, as the weakest link of the team, survived missions.

As far as he'd acknowledged before now, that was where the progress stopped in why he called her stubborn. At simple obligation of a superior to assist their subordinate.

But as they had trained and grown close before Sasuke's return, she had become an equal even if he hadn't realized it at the time. Finally, after years of being around the kunoichi and watching her undergo the most dramatic shift of any Team 7 member, Kakashi finally realized what had always made him hesitate with her.

Sakura loved.

She gave her heart, her body, and her soul to others. Every life was a life worth saving in her eyes – she always had shied away from the torture aspect of bringing in enemies. That wasn't to say she hadn't undergone training in being tortured that, in a morbid reflection, was likely a wise move. Sakura had the ability to be an open book and related to others well because of it as people were naturally drawn to her kindness and strength.

When they'd had the fateful battle at the bridge where Sasuke had tried to kill her, twice, the years of subconscious resentment had built up. Some dark part of his mind was angry at her that she still harbored feelings for her defected teammate. She had nearly been killed two separate times because she simply couldn't value her life as more than others'. Anger that he thought stemmed from having to save her was instead of concern. Chidori crackled in his dreams at times, but he woke up never being able to place the nightmare's cause.

He had been angry at her for putting herself at risk – for almost dying and snuffing a light of hope that she emanated.

Standing under the stream of hot water that burned his skin, Kakashi found why she was so frustrating for the first time. In her transition to crying, the pinkette had turned in his hold to press her chest against his and tuck her head below his chin while sobs wracked her frame. One damaged by the trials of shinobi, but worth more than being burdened by him.

"You're not reading underneath the underneath."

Sobs grew harsher.

"You don't get to die."

Hiccups replaced sobs and her eyes turned up to meet his, finally clear of the haze she'd come home with.

"Who would heal me when I refuse to go to the hospital?"

Pink lips curled up in a soft smile. Does she understand?

Stuttering breaths finally slowed until she took a deep, heaving breath and let it out. Emerald hadn't broken from obsidian when she finally spoke. "I'll be what you need me to be, even if it's just being alive."

A hitch in his throat and pain in his chest caught him off guard. He was growing weak every second he was with her, every moment he spent letting her further and further into his twisted, fucked upmind. Naruto had plenty of clear weaknesses, so many people he was close with and valued. Yet, Naruto had the strength to have bonds.

It was easy and weak to isolate and hide from the world, it was hard and took strength to love to build bonds and care for people when there was always a risk of losing them. Kakashi would never allow himself to be weak.

So, he kissed her.

Hard and sudden, he lightened the pressure as he pressed himself tighter against her. Unlike the previous time, Sakura responded to his touch almost instantly. Her arms shifted to reach up and wrap around his neck so she could bury her hands in his hair. Blood and grime having been washed away, she looked more like herself now.

And gods he wanted her, all of her.

Innocent kisses turned faster and more passionate as he let his tongue push past her pink lips. Rough hands slid down her body and came to rest with his thumbs brushing her hip bones and his fingers wrapping around to caress her backside. The movement brought a sharp gasp from her, but he barely allowed her the space to take a breath before resuming their kissing.

Consciousness of his actions brought his body to a harsh stop and he gripped her hips firmly. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't –"

"Please don't leave." Anger thrummed in his chest at the comment, the same one she'd made before, but it was entirely directed at himself. For making her feel like he always was mentally somewhere else, even if he was physically present, and that he would push her away if she didn't give him everything.

"You don't need to offer me anything to make me stay," Kakashi responded.

A spark lit in her eyes and the frightened woman from moments before was gone to be replaced by one teasing him. Dark eyes glared down at her, unsure if he was being mocked.

"No, I don't have to offer you anything, but I want to offer you this. But I want you to be sure. I want you to be certain and I don't want you to feel guilty for doing something that makes you happy. You deserve to be happy, Kakashi." Sakura had a way of speaking to him, a way of acting towards him, that made Kakashi feel as if it could be true that he deserved a good life.

Despite all the harm he'd done, to her and the rest of the world, Sakura never stopped trusting in him and seeing the best in him. In his darkest hours and times when he tried to shut the world out with anger, she patiently stood by and waited for him to burn himself out before he came back to her. There had been plenty of rough conversations when he'd come home from a mission where, because of a defensive mechanism, he had made it his personal mission to push her away.

He told her their training was getting boring.

He told her she needed to work on a certain skill with someone that wasn't him.

He told her that he was too busy to train with her.

But she always pressed and pushed until somehow they were scheduled to be around one another. Training, drinking, and even the rare mission together.

"I think we both need sleep more than anything right now." Nodding, the pinkette leaned forward to press herself close to him as if he would run from her just because they'd started to move into unknown territory. Returning his hands to her hair, he massaged any final knots out before they both dressed and fell into a deep sleep curled towards each other.