Chapter Thirteen
The ice returned to Red's chest at his words.
"What? Why would I be shot?! Does he have a lot of crazy women on the side like your father did or something?"
"Just Tanya, really. Willin' ta bet she'll come for ya like a hellcat if she runs into ya in town. But you'll have more ta worry about from the Feds. And from rival assassins, o'course. Also the families of his victims. It's a lot ta consider. But keep in mind, I'm only havin' this talk with you at all because I see somethin' startin' ta build an' I figured I'd address it early on. Now enough o' this theoretical bullshit. Hand me them gloves an' that water pail by the door. I'm about ta fix yer goddamn sink. While I do this, Imma need you ta take a wander through your house, tell me what ya think needs fixin' and what you'd like ta se in here."
Red got to her feet to grab the requested items.
"A second bed, for Glory when you find her. A little book shelf maybe. Some books, whatever you can spare. Wood for the fire and something soft for Bandit to sleep on in front of the fireplace. The roof leaks a little, and the windows leak even more. I'm always cold in here. I can't pay you for any of this. But I can work, like Darwin suggested. That's all. I really appreciate your help more than I can say."
Lester unsmilingly acknowledged the list, nodding.
"Write it all down. Imma work through the list a step at a time until we're there."
Red wandered through the house, shyly making note of the most severe problems. Water damage to the floors and walls in the bathroom, missing panes of glass over the kitchen sink clumsily covered in a taped garbage bag. A patch of daylight filtering into the living room from a hole in the ceiling. Lester nodded at every new issue, mentally calculating the materials he would need and the amounts of each.
"Alright, those are the most pressin' problems. Imma see ta them first thing. Now how about some o' the less vital issues? What's yer favorite color?"
Red was taken off guard by the question.
"Well, I like green very much. And blues too. Ocean colors. Forest colors. Why?"
"Paint an' carpet, also beddin' fer the bed. We gotta get rid o' that single bed, move in a double. Get ya another sofa, somethin' safe ta sit on. Shit like that. Imma let Tsugi work with ya on the interior design parts, just put in the grunt work when she tells me what y'all are gonna be needin'."
It was all a little surprising, this sudden generosity. Red lowered her head, quiet with gratitude.
"Thanks, Lester. What about the two-way radio that Darwin mentioned? He said I should always keep it on."
"It's a handheld unit ya clip to yer belt or leave on yer nightstand, plus a chargin' unit. You should set it up on the kitchen counter. Play yer cards right an' ya may get a cell phone someday. But not until we're sure we kin trust ya."
Red nodded slowly, thinking to herself that this sounded like some kind of cultish boot camp.
"Imma bring up the radio an' get it all squared away this evenin'."
"I'll make sure to keep an ear out for it, if it goes off. No matter where I am. You also said you had some sewing you wanted me to do. I...um..."
Lester turned to look at her, sighing.
"Lemme guess. Ya got no Earthly clue how ta use a sewin' machine."
Miserably, Red shook her head.
"I could maybe hand stitch a little." she offered. The stocky Tremor shrugged.
"Hell, it'll have ta do fer now. I'll teach ya how ta work a sewin' machine one o' these days, save ya a little time. But for now, hand stitchin' is just fine." He leaned back against the counter and crossed his arms, fixing her with his stern blue gaze. "Despite what Darwin said, I got no intention o' lettin' him work ya to death. Anytime things get too rough for ya, you come tell me. Understand?"
This unexpected comment from a person whom she believed to hold her in a certain amount of contempt took Red completely by surprise. She stared at Lester for a moment, just standing there in the run-down kitchen with the sunlight behind him. Her brows knitted together in confusion. Then she took a step forward, and hesitated.
Lester inclined his head slightly in a nod.
Red needed no more invitation than this. She moved forward into his arms and rested her head on his shoulder, and he gave her a rough hug and patted her back. Red's voice was muffled by his shirt.
"It's been so damn long since the last time I felt this safe. You just have no idea how grateful I am and you don't even know me and I'm a total drain on your resources and a pain in your ass and I'm bringing nothing but trouble. I think I insulted Darwin last night when I went into his room. I thought...I don't know, I just assumed I would have to pay for this the way I'm used to anymore. But he didn't m-make me do anything. He just held me and he kissed me and said 'Go to sleep', and I did, and he felt so damn good and he was so kind even though I know he's a criminal and so are you and so am I and I don't care and I just w-want to stay here forever and never leave and I d-don't care what I have to do and...and..." Red's eyes were clouded with tears, and she felt a little light-headed suddenly. "And you smell really good. And I trust you and I'm sorry I took your bed the first night I was here and I'm also sorry for being a fat citified soft useless thing..."
Her words were abruptly cut off as Lester grabbed her chin in his rough palm, tilted her tear stained face up to his, and kissed her forehead. Red froze, and her eyes closed.
After a moment he pulled back from her and stroked her cheek, waiting for her eyes to open and look into his. Red merely blinked, confusion and a strange tender bruise in her chest stripping away every other emotion she might be feeling.
Lester's voice was gruff.
"Shut the hell up about all o' that, goddammit. And about your numerous shortcomin's."
"But you said I was soft and useless and..."
"I know what I said." He gently pushed her away. "I lied. Now grab that tape measure an' help me get some figures for the corner yonder. There by the window."
"How come?"
"Imma cobble together a cat tree fer that hairy sumbitch ya brought along. But it ain't gonna be bolted down or nothin'. I got me a pretty good feelin' you ain't gonna be stayin' in this here cabin for too much longer." He moved past her, inspecting the wall by the window with his tattooed hands. "Think I should just kinda lean it in here, maybe brace it with just one or two wires inta the studs."
Red searched his tool box for a tape measure. She felt more fascinated by the family than ever.
"Why would you say that? Darwin told me I could stay here."
Lester slid his glasses out of his pocket and put them on, studying the wall.
"Well, I say that on account o' Dar is likely to invite ya on up to the house pretty frequently. An' eventually he's gonna probably offer you a room there. I saw you two in the kitchen this mornin'. And I saw the way he reacted ta you. He was real gentle, for him." He turned around slowly to look at her.
"Did you say ya went into his room to put the moves on him? Fer goddamn real?" He was grinning. Red felt her face get got.
"I just thought it was going to be expected of me, you know. To pay for my being here."
"Oh bullshit. You wanted him. Ha! Ain't that somethin'."
"That's not..."
"Somethin' musta set you off." He thought for a moment, bright eyes intent behind those glittering spectacles. Then realization dawned on his face.
"You heard Tsugi an' me. You heard us makin' love."
Red looked at the floor and said nothing.
"That's it, ain't it. Ya heard us through the wall an' it compelled you ta slip on outta your room an' seek out my brother. You wanted him, even if you ain't admittin' it. Even if you don't wanna allow yerself ta feel it. Red, when was the last time you were with a man, anyhow?"
She ducked her head and mumbled.
"About four months ago. In the back of a taxi cab."
"How romantic." Lester said sarcastically. "The boyfriend get arrested or shot or somethin'? Why ain't he still with ya? Did he go on back to his wife?"
The jabs hurt, and Red threw the tape measure to the floor and turned to whip open the door.
"No, you asshole! I didn't even know his name! I was starving and Bandit was too! So I sold myself to a guy for $50 so I could get us some food! Now I'm going for a walk, and I don't care if you shoot me in the back for it! I need some air. I'll just be down the beach. Just...just leave me alone." She snapped, and stormed out.
The path down to the water's edge was bordered by scrubby salt rose bushes and rocks. Red's sneakers sank into the soft sand, making it a little hard to walk. But she trudged on anyway, rubbing at her eyes to stop the angry tears.
Whore. Thief. Runaway. Falling for a killer but winding up in his brother's arms the moment the opportunity presented itself.
She could still feel Darwin's warm, lean body against hers if she shut her eyes and imagined it. Last night had been phenomenal, like a happy dream. And Lester had been tender with her, showing her a small flash of mercy and compassion and a tenderness that she hadn't seen in years. If what Les had said was true...then she would be enjoying a whole lot more than a hug and kiss pretty soon. From all of them. Semi-consensual as it may be, but how different was it from selling her body to strangers back in the awful dark days on the streets? Where was the line? Was there even a line anymore, or had she compromised herself so much that simple things like love and sex and morality no longer had any discernible meaning left to them? Selling yourself for food is only a few steps, philosophically speaking, from selling yourself for kindness. Warmth. Safety.
Saddened, she lowered herself onto a rock and wrapped her arms around her knees, looking out at the water. Letting the salt spray tingle her face and sting away the tears in her eyes. The sight of all that vast, open water stretching out forever to the horizon made her feel calm and free. Relaxed. She leaned down and untied her sneakers, then pulled off her shirt. It was freezing. But Red didn't care. That gray, choppy water was too beautiful to resist, and she wanted to feel it on her skin. She unzipped the jeans she was wearing, Darwin's jeans, and dropped them onto the sand. In her bra and panties, tattered and rather stained from overuse, she felt vulnerable and exposed and fat and ugly. Never mind that though, no one could see her here.
The walk to the waterline more than strengthened her resolve. She stepped into the sea and waded out to her hips, her skin going numb almost instantly. Seaweed sluggishly crept around her legs and the waves surged up and around her body, making her gasp. But still she waded out, walking on the sandy bottom until the water lifted her up with every step right to her tiptoes. It was unbearably cold.
"I really hope you ain't plannin' on drownin' yourself, Red." She heard a voice call from the shore. Startled, she turned to see Darwin standing just beyond the reach of the waves. Dammit. Lester must have called him after the scene in the kitchen. Red was about to shout back that she was well and good and didn't need a babysitter, thank you very much, when a swell caught her in the act of turning and knocked her off her feet. When she tried to get up again, she was alarmed to find that her feet didn't touch the bottom anymore. Another swell of water, not quite a wave, spilled over her head. She swallowed seawater, her eyes opening in the stinging gray light beneath the surface, and she beheld a vast darkness to her left. The deeper water. Cold, horrible and hungry, and the inexorable undertow was tugging her firmly toward it. Terror leaked all throughout her system, and she didn't even know which way was up anymore.
Her head broke the surface of the water and she gulped air in desperation, flailing against the power of the water. She was driven under again, kicking her legs and getting nowhere.
A hand gripped her hair, yanking her violently back, and another hand closed about her flailing wrist. Her head was pulled above the surface of the water and she coughed, taking in deep grateful gulps of oxygen. Darwin was swimming strong beside her, hauling her with ease toward the shore. Red wanted to fight him. She was humiliated that she needed rescuing a second time, but she was too worn out to protest. She went limp and let the country boy tow her to the shallows, to where she could stand up. Together they slogged through the chilly waves to the beach. Red fell to her knees and threw up a few mouthfuls of saltwater on the sand, along with some undigested breakfast. Darwin knelt beside her and pulled her hair back from her face as she was sick. He didn't say a word, and when Red was finally able to look up at him his blue eyes held no mocking or triumph. They just looked at one another for a few minutes in silence. Then Darwin helped her to her feet and wrapped his shirt around her red, abraded shoulders. He picked up her clothing from the shore and guided her toward the cottage once more, away from the water.
Lester wasn't there anymore when they pushed open the door and stepped inside together, but there was a fire going in the hearth and the room was wonderfully warm. Darwin closed the door and helped Red to the couch, where she collapsed into a wet, shivering heap. He pulled a folded blanket off the sofa and wrapped it around her, rubbing her arms. Then he slowly sat down beside her and pulled her against him. Only then did he finally speak.
"You have got to be the most accident-prone goddamn human bein' on the face of the planet, Red."
"And the luckiest. I'm not dead yet, after all." She retorted wearily. She felt him chuckle, and he hugged her closer.
"I can relate to that."
He turned slightly to look at her, and when he touched her cheek she didn't pull away.
"You got nice eyes. Kinda moss colored and real expressive."
Red had heard many compliments in her life, most of them more poetic or smooth than this one. But for some reason, none of them had shot right to the middle of her heart like Darwin's simple statement. Her chest burned, and it had nothing to do with the raw sting of lingering saltwater in her throat.
"What are they expressing right now, Darwin?"
He blinked, his devil-blue gaze unraveling her completely.
"They're sayin', 'Don't hurt me'. They're sayin', 'I'm lonely.' And they're sayin', 'I want you.'"
Red swallowed, hard.
"I...I think that's pretty accurate, sir." Her voice was faint. Darwin's eyes flicked to her lips, and he gently rubbed his calloused thumb across them.
"I ain't gonna hurt you, Red. You are a pain in the ass and a test of my patience and that of my family's. But I'm not gonna hurt you." He said after a moment, and she could feel his breath against her face.
"Darwin..." She whispered. Her eyes started to fill with tears again. He reached up with his other hand and wiped them away.
"There ain't no need for cryin'. I'm not a knight in shinin' armor and you barely know me. I don't know you either, but I'm a real quick study. You're gonna have to trust me."
"Darwin, Lester and I had a talk. And he kissed me. In the kitchen here. Not like…not a sexual kiss. Just…nice. And he told me about the Blood Oath. And he said you might, that you might want me. Or something." She blurted it all out very fast, a blush rising to her cheeks. Darwin's eyebrow rose, but it was the only indication of emotion.
"Lester? He ain't given to kissin' anyone except Tsugi and occasionally Jeevesie's wounds after he puts a Bandaid on 'em. Wonder what prompted that."
"I think it was my emotional outburst."
"Ha! Yeah, could have been. Odd, that he mentioned the Oath to you before talkin' with me about it."
Red had nothing to say to this, so she simply looked away and chewed on her lower lip. Darwin let the quiet moment slide by for a little while. Then he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear and sighed.
"So he told you about the Oath. What'd you think of it?"
"That it sounded creepy and barbaric."
"Fair enough, but it's in place for a good reason. This family has got to stay strong. Nothin' rips apart three men like a woman insertin' herself between them. What you see as creepy and barbaric is our method of combatin' those forces which could conceivably put a strain on us all. An' it ain't like we force anyone into it."
"He told me about...about Tanya."
At this, Darwin leaned back and stared at her. Anger crossed his features, and he abruptly stood up.
"You need dry clothes. Better run change now, Red. I'll make up a pot of coffee or somethin', put some more wood on the fire."
"What did I..."
"I said go change. Don't make me ask you a third time."
Her heart in her mouth and a strange feeling of sorrow dampening her far more than the saltwater, she obeyed him.
She dried her hair and body, put on fresh deodorant and touched up her makeup a little, and swapped her wet clothing for a pair of his soft flannel pants, warm socks and a long t-shirt. By the time she re-emerged from the bedroom, Darwin had the battered old kettle heating on the stove and two mugs set out, a jar of instant coffee and a box of sugar beside it. He was kneeling by the fire, dark golden hair illuminated by the dancing flames. Through the window to the left of the hearth, ominous clouds were rolling in low across the landscape.
"Good God, does it ever stop raining here?"
Darwin glanced back at her over his shoulder.
"It's just the autumn weather. We get a real wet season in spring too. Anytime the temperature shifts, there's a storm. Pretty soon you'll be missing the days of just rain, when the snow starts in. There are times when we're all but immobilized all the way out here past the city. Lucky thing we don't need them for much."
"I heard about all your methods of self-sufficiency. It sounds like you've thought of everything. But then, I guess in your line of work the less time you spend around others the better." Red moved to pick up the steaming kettle and make them both a cup of strong coffee. Then she came and knelt by Darwin, handing him one of the chipped ceramic mugs. He took it and sat back on his heels, taking a sip. Red looked into the flames and waited for him to speak, uncertain and shy.
"I don't like talkin' about Tanya." He finally said, "Don't bring her up again."
"I'm sorry. She must have hurt you pretty badly."
"You have no idea. And I ain't the kind of man who talks about shit like that. Anyhow, she don't got a damn thing to do with us." He turned to face her, and she lifted her gaze to meet his intense blue stare. "Red, you're kind of a fascinatin' mixture of plucky tough girl and total idiot. I find that a little endearin'. You're pretty. I like all that red hair of yours. And there's somethin' in your face that makes me want to pull you right up against me and hold you there. I guess you could call all that attraction. When you came into my room the other night, I thought it was because you felt it too. Not to pay for shelter or anythin' like that, but because I'm a man and you're a woman and sometimes you just gotta let nature take its course. I responded because I wanted to respond."
"I feel so bad about that..."
"I ain't done."
"Sorry."
Darwin sighed and set his coffee aside. His hand was rough and calloused against her wrist as he took her left hand and looked down at it, running his thumb over her ring finger.
"Were you engaged or were you married. A gal don't get an indention like this on her finger unless she wore a ring for a long time."
Now it was Red's turn to look angry. She tried to yank her hand back, but the Tremor leader held it firmly. His deadly eyes flicked up to look at her, but he didn't lift his head. It was the most menacing sight she'd seen in her life, that glare. And she'd seen a hell of a lot.
Some of the fire went out of her.
"Engaged."
"And it ended why."
"Because I ran away, sir."
"What prompted that?"
"He beat me. He hit my cat. He threatened to kill me if I ran, and he had the wherewithal to do it. His name was Ahmed, and he's a monster. He's also the first born son of a very wealthy Egyptian family, and that family has a lot of influence in the States. Political influence, and ties to a Black Market shipping ring. His family is probably helping him track me down. And who can help me? No one. My parents and I haven't spoken in years, they're in Germany. They emigrated about seven years ago. My little sister Glorianna...Glory...was about the only person that his family could hurt in an effort to drive me back to him. So I put her on a bus and sent her to friends of friends of friends. I lost her. I needed to lose her. For her own good, you understand? Her mind isn't... I mean, she has a form of high functioning Autism. And maybe more. I don't know. There is no way I could let her fall into their clutches. So I sent her off, and I grabbed my cat and fled the house one morning after Ahmed left for work. A neighbor who knew about the beatings because he heard us fight through the wall gave me some money, and I bolted as far as I could with it. But money has a tendency to run out, which it did. With no one to rely on and nowhere to turn, I just kind of fell back on my own devices. And that's where I am now."
Darwin listened to every word intently, the whole awful story pouring out of her like pus from a wound. Red was surprised to find that she could speak normally while she looked into those eyes. She wasn't sobbing, wasn't shaking or stuttering the way she normally did if she spoke of difficult subjects. Something about his steadiness and strength lent itself to her. She took a deep breath. Let it out in a sigh. And he released her hand and rubbed her shoulder.
"Let them come find you then. Do I look like the kinda man who worries about organized crime or rich spoiled foreign boys or any of the crap you just mentioned? Last month I put a bullet through the brain of a CIA agent who was cheatin' a business partner of his. You think that gave me the slightest pause? Hell no. Think I'm losin' sleep over whether or not the CIA is huntin' for me now? Not a wink. Red, you worry too damn much. Relax. You are safe here. Worst thing you're gonna have to deal with is me." He winked, and Red relaxed. Strange, that she should feel comforted by this man right after he'd confessed to a capital crime.
"I don't mind dealing with you." She said it too quickly, and Darwin smirked.
"You say that now. I ain't always so warm and friendly."
"You were pretty calm when I pointed that remote at you in the living room."
"Shit, I knew it wasn't loaded."
Red found herself completely and totally amused all of the sudden. Darwin's nonchalance in the face of certain death, the way his wet hair fell into his shocking blue eyes, his husky laugh and the easy way he reclined there beside her, it was all just too much.
"You have got to be the strangest human being I've ever met in my life."
"Reckon I am. Not the worst thing I've ever heard." He studied her face for a moment, then got to his feet. "I should head on back up to the house. I was in the middle of somethin' when Les got me on the radio, said you'd walked down to the sea in a bit of a mood."
"One way of putting it." Red didn't want to elaborate, she wasn't sure how much he knew. And she certainly didn't want to mention it. That would be giving away a hell of a lot more than she really wanted to.
"Alright, I'll be seein' you soon."
"Wait," Red said, her voice pleading. Darwin paused.
"Yeah?"
"My little sister. Darwin, the sooner we get her here, the better. Please. Here." She fumbled for a stub of carpenter's pencil and the back of an old receipt laying nearby on the table, detritus from Lester's toolbox. Quickly, she scribbled down a list of names, locations, a description of her sister, the clothes she was wearing and the location of a little birth mark on the back of her thigh.
"Here,. Glorianna Rachel Blumenkrantz. Then Krause. That's my last name too. I sent her toward a cousin in Nantucket, who was supposed to send her elsewhere. No one knew where the next stop would be. Just keep her moving, I said. And they did."
Darwin took the receipt and folded it and put it in his pocket.
"Alright then." He said quietly, and turned again to go. Before he left, he paused with his hand on the rusty old doorknob.
"Don't wander off again. Not without one of us with you. I catch you tryin' to escape or dodge us and you and me are gonna have ourselves a mighty serious conversation. The kind that'll leave you unable to sit for a week."
It took 30 seconds for his words to sink in fully.
"What?"
"You heard me. Supper's at six, I'll be expectin' you there. Afterwards, the floors and toilets upstairs need scrubbin'. We got a four story house plus an attic, and we only live in the bottom level. Ain't been cleaned up there real good for a couple months.
"You…want me to start tonight?"
"Good a time as any."
Darwin opened the door.
"Might wanna wear somethin' comfortable. I need to run some errands in town, got a couple things I need to pick up. I'll see you at six."
Red sat still for a few moments after he left, then moved to the window and slid back the curtain to watch him walk away. Slow. Relaxed. More of a prowl than a walk, looking up at the sky from time to time to admire the clouds. His dark golden hair gleamed in the sun like summer wheat. It was hard to put a finger on what she was feeling. But there was something there, lingering in her chest and not letting her be still.
After he vanished over the crest of the hill, she finally moved. And with a sigh, walked down the shabby hallway to her bathroom to freshen up for her night of slave labor.