So far so good. Even better than Yasuo would have imagined. All this previous night spent planning their shared afternoon, with serious studying and some affection from time to time. Nothing came as close as what they did at the moment.
When Yi decided to take a break, he swore his reaction was the most obvious in the world, making him the happiest man.
So good….
Funny how any of the cliché things seemed so nice right now, like taking his boyfriend in his room with the lame excuse of working to cover the fact they would just kiss and snuggle. It was perfect, beyond his imagination.
He had someone, he had Yi actually in his arms as they held each other in his bed, blanket half over them. Nothing could describe as close this feeling of peace mixed with anticipation and powerful need to hug back.
They stayed right there, soft gazes on each other and small carresses. Only this setting could allow this shy exploration, curious hands over each other tracing features as to engrave it forever in their memories. Yasuo felt the latter's hand trail down his cheek, his jaw then going up to tuck a strand behind his ear. So kind gesture, it would make him cry innerly.
Was it what intimacy meant ? Far from the crude sense but rather in the allowance to be seen fully by someone loved. No one could ever reach such step so easily yet it could seem so innocent. It gave him time to admire Yi's face, so handsome it had ruined his thoughts several times before they even confessed. His eyes, still gazing back at him with a specific gentleness. Oh love, to feel so special.
« I'm so lucky… » Musing aloud while he mirrored Yi's gestures, hoping to convey the same affection.
Yasuo's heart missed a beat when he saw the latter smile in return, something that could make someone blind even if it wasn't possible. This was the way he saw it, bright joy.
« So am I. Do you have any idea how adorable you look right now ? You're making me fall in love again and again. »
All this said with such loving expression, no way to repress these sudden feelings. Yasuo was helpless and the latter just made it 'worse'.
« Wait, you can't say that. It's illegal ! » Already following the rush, he rose enough to properly look at him, supporting himself on an elbow.
« Illegal or not, you're too cute for my heart. See how you act tough at highschool and now you're just….adorable, I have no words. »
This was madness, they just made each other more endeared and affectionate. No doubt this was the result of a long time holding back, love built up over time. It killed Yasuo softly, until he couldn't bear it anymore.
« I'll show you adorable ! »
Enough, he rolled them over until Yi was on his back and him just above. Not so new position, they already fell to that after too much love and now it was happening again.
Yasuo knew he was blushing something fierce, he could feel his own face burn slightly under skin. It was alright, he knew Yi wouldn't make fun of him but the situation still reduced him to a soft mess.
Right there on top of the latter, he was slapped by the reality of such position then he smothered this fluster as quick. Relax, relax. Yet he couldn't resist the urge, he wanted so much no matter what shape it could take.
First reflex was to kiss Yi, diving for this easy distraction from his own busy thoughts. Mmmh… Met half-way, his initiative found equal reponse from the latter as he laced his arms around Yasuo. Welcome without conditions.
It went like most of their kisses this afternoon, at first an eager press against each other until it slipped to a long spiral of urgent affection. This was his oxygen, his reason to live and go on. Yi responded so well, just a hint of tongue as if shy to go further.
Little by little Yasuo ended up fully lying on top of him, held strongly while their exchange turned sloppy. For so much time, it didn't matter anymore if it was coordinated or not. The essential was to feel and return everything. Love built up, gradually, until it was almost felt physically between them.
So good it made him rock against Yi, a small noise escaping him as quick. Instantly both froze, making stand out even more this short jerking before. Oh no. Fuck. Parting so slightly, they stared at each other and Yasuo wasn't the only one blushing dark. The latter wasn't far behind, wide gaze betraying surprise and a touch of of something that wasn't so bad.
No, no, no, no…
« Ah… shit, sorry… »
Could a blush kill someone on the spot ? Yasuo was close to find out. In this instant he felt like he was trapped, no way to move. He could just gaze back at Yi, lost between despair and shame. You big fucking idiot.
How could he explain this ? Even right now he felt it, new warmth in his chest that threatened to go lower. It was too late, his body went ahead of his silent desires.
Be it by reflex or else, he parted from Yi, staying on top while making sure not to grind against him. This would be terrible, once was already too much. Otherwise, he couldn't do anything. As if he was to be smitten on the spot, facing judgement for this sad need. Yet the latter said nothing, thank fully.
Next move was from Yi indeed, careful hand reaching for his face. That expression was a hell of a punch, between slight shock and respectable curiosity. Despite himself Yasuo leaned into contact, exactly what he yearned even under powerful shame. Not once eye contact was broken, almost by fear but also to see what would happen from now, since there was no drastic reaction.
Too busy fighting his own arousal, Yasuo didn't register in time that other hand sneaking between them until it brushed shyly his crotch. Mortified he felt himself shortly rock back, even as it gave no friction. No….
« Oh…I see. » Small contemplation from Yi, breaking that deafening silence. All this time they looked at each other and now Yasuo felt like averting his gaze.
Before he could indeed act on this and definitely move out of their embrace, Yi made a move and pulled him into a kiss. That one caught his breath like never, earning a pitiful moan in that passionate exchange. Yasuo followed the move, this was the only thing he could manage and it was far too sweet to let it got to waste. Fear still lurked nearby, ready to jump on him at the smallest occasion.
What he didn't expect was to be completely taken back in their embrace, fully pressed to Yi in a position impossible to explain innocently. Then Yasuo felt it. Arousal. Not his. Oh— All this made his head spin, too many things at once.
When at last Yi let go from this ardent attention, he had that one gaze. The one at the limit of lust, gently burning for the man he held close. Between that and his lips turning pinkish after such dedicated kisses, Yasuo didn't know where to look. That's…that's hot… Trembling need, because with all this mess going on, it seemed rather alright. This was a good sign, wasn't it ?
Several times Yi looked about to speak but it didn't come, visible fluster happening in real time. Then at last he took a deep breath and did it.
« I…I apologize too. At least, we're both…it's fine for me. I wouldn't mind. »