A/N: Happy Easter to everyone and as an Easter treat, I am posting this early. I hope everyone has a safe and nice time. We find out more about John and what he's up to and what is happening with the brothers. I do like reviews and please take a moment and leave one. It would lift my spirits. NC

Chapter 16

"Are you sure about this John?" Bobby asked as he watched John change the oil in his truck.

"Yes, there are things I need to be doing and I can't just stop hunting. It's in my blood now. Even with Yellow Eyes dead, there are still monsters out there that need to be stopped," John replied as he slid from under the truck. He was careful about getting up, but his injuries were healing, and he had stayed here too long as it was.

"You think three days of healing is enough for you to go back out there on a hunt?"

"I thought I'd swing by the Roadhouse and talk to Ash. I may have a project for him."

"Have you thought anymore on what we talked about. They're both still your boys and they need their Daddy."

"Give me a little more time, I'll call Dean soon," John said looking away. He didn't want to flat out lie to Bobby, but he was still having a hard time accepting what had happened to his youngest. He had trained his boys to be warriors and to hunt the monsters that were out there, but had Sam become one of those monsters now? It was hard for him at accept that Sam was not the same boy that he had know those months ago when they had fought about him going to college. Maybe if he hadn't been so stubborn and hardheaded none of this would have happened to him. He should have insisted Dean drive him to college and made sure he was safe. He was carrying a heavy burden of guilt and had to get away on his own to think things out.

"Don't take too long John," Bobby cautioned him when he saw the guarded look on his face that said more than John was will to.

"I'm almost done here, and I'll get a quick shower and be on my way. Thanks for letting me stay here."

"I've got to do a parts run to the next town over so I guess you'll be gone by the time I get back. You take care out there, John. Don't get yourself in over your head since you're still not a hundred percent."

"Take care of my boys Bobby. They may need you," John told him before turning away and ending the conversation.

Bobby huffed as he turned to leave wondering if John would make it right his sons. He didn't like to see a family split like this but knew he couldn't make it happen. He would have to wait like Missouri said and hope fate would bring them back together again. With John leaving, Bobby decided to call Dean and let him know they were welcome to visit. To be honest, he wanted to see Sam for himself and talk to him. He trusted Missouri's opinion, but it never hurt to see it firsthand. He got into his work truck and headed down the driveway lost in his thoughts.

spn

John finished up on his truck and moved it out of the garage bay and to the front of the house. He went inside and headed upstairs to shower and pack to leave. He paused at the bedroom across from the bathroom and looked in at the twin beds his sons used when they stayed here. His heart was weighted down with the anguish and uncertainty he felt. He huffed out a long sigh before going into the bathroom and closing the door.

It didn't take John long to pack up his few belongings, and head down the stairs and out the front door, locking it behind him. He wasn't sure if he'd make it to the Roadhouse today or would need to stop along the way for the night. It being a weekday, he knew Ellen would be closing at midnight and wouldn't want to wake anyone. He would see how he felt and wouldn't push himself. John knew his limits and before searching out a hunt he wanted to be sure he was ready.

But while he waited, John was going to continue his search for the Colt. Rumors about it was that it was a special handgun made by Samuel Colt and it possessed the means to kill anything supernatural. He had planned on using it on the Yellowed Eyed Demon if he could find it, but now if he could find it, it would give him the upper hand on any monster he came across. He was going to have Ash follow up on a couple of leads he ran across just before his tangle with the ghouls that took him out of the game.

The motel John found was about three hours from the Roadhouse and would suit his needs. He opened the door of the single room and glanced around before entering and sitting his bag on the bed. He went to the bathroom and relieved himself and washed his hands before stepping back into the main room. He rummaged in his pockets to see if he had enough change to grab a soda from the vending machines he saw below his room. After looking in his bag and finding a few quarters. John went back out and walked down to the drink machine. He looked at his choices with little interest before dropping the money in and pushing one of the buttons. The bottled drink clunked down and he retrieved it, raising up slowly to head back to the room.

It was still early, so John found the remote and turned on the television to find something to watch. He adjusted the pillows and settled back against the headboard to watch an old war movie and sipped on the soda. His mind wasn't on the movie but on his sons, both of them, and what Bobby had tried to tell him. Was he blowing this out of proportion and not taking into consideration that Sam might be stronger than he thinks? Maybe the demons had been goading him with the information they had given him. He sighed and looked at his cell that was laying on the nightstand and reached for it wanting to call his eldest but stopped his hand from picking it up. He let his hand fall back to the covers and huffed madly at himself. What would he even say to him? Would Dean take his call or ignore it? John turned back to the movie and tried to pick up the plot to watch it. He would finish his drink and turn in, hoping he could sleep without the dreams coming back.

Ever since John had woke up in the hospital and learned what Sam had done, killing Azazel, he had been plagued with nightmares centering around Sam. He would wake up shaking and sweating and not remembering very much of the nightmares because of his head injury, but there was enough there that it scared him. He rubbed his temples and tired eyes for a moment and decided not to put it off and got up to do his bathroom routine before going to bed. There was so much rolling through his mind that he didn't know if he could shut it down enough to sleep but needed to try because he could tell his body was still recovering from his injuries.

spn

His cell began to ring, and Bobby shuffled papers to find and answer it. "H'llo," he spoke in his rough, harsh voice.

"Hey, Bobby how are things going?" Dean asked happy to hear his voice.

"I was going to call you and let you know yer Daddy left today heading for the Roadhouse," Bobby said.

"Why is he going there?"

"He wants Ash to help him with some research but wouldn't say what."

"Is he coming back there?"

"I doubt it; at least it didn't sound like it. You boys wanting to head my way?"

"Yes, I think Missouri has done all she can for Sammy, and we need to get out of her hair. Let her have a little peace and quiet."

"You're welcome to come here you know that. I'd like to see Sam."

"Okay, we'll pack up and head your way. Leave the porch light on for us."

"I will and drive safe," he said before hanging up. It would be good to see the boys and he could make his own observations about Sam.

"Just got off the phone with Bobby and he wants us to visit him," Dean told Sam as he walked into the kitchen. "What say we leave after lunch and head his way?"

"What about Dad?" Sam asked cautiously.

"Not there. He left and headed for the Roadhouse. I get it Sammy, you don't have to see Dad until you're ready," Dean told him in a softer tone.

"Did I hear you say you boys are leaving?" Missouri asked as she stepped in from the laundry room.

"Yeah, we've stayed long enough," Dean said. "You'll probably be glad for some peace and quiet."

"You boys are never a bother and if you ever need a place to stay if you're in the area my home is open to you," she replied. "Bobby wanted some herbs sent back with you. Sam want to help me get them ready while your brother packs?"

"Sure, I can do that," Sam said. He got up to follow her out the backdoor and glanced back at Dean who was heading for the stairs to get them packed. He knew Missouri wanted to talk to him alone before they left.

"Alright, let me see, agrimony, betony, cubeb, devil's bit, mullen, and oil of abramelin. I believe that is it," she recited as she pulled the items from the shelves. "If you'll put these in a bag for Bobby," she instructed as she shook out the herbs into small zip lock bags and the oil into a vial. "Tell him I'll send him a bill."

"Why don't you let me pay you and Bobby can just pay me back?" Sam suggested thinking it would be easier and Missouri could have her money quicker.

"Why thank you child, that will work," she praised him. "I also want to give you something. This is a mixture of benzoin, sandalwood, vanilla and dittany of Crete. If you will burn some of this before trying astral projection, it will help you to be able to do it easier until you have mastered the ability."

"Thanks," Sam said looking at the plastic bag of mixed herbs.

"And this a special tea I blended myself, there is nothing in it that can harm you, but it will help you to calm and center yourself and allow you to access your powers."

"Do I drink it every day?" he questioned accepting the bag of ground up herbs.

"Maybe for a few weeks, just use a teaspoon in half a cup of hot water and let it steep for five minutes. This should last for several months and if you need more let me know and I can send some to you."

"Thank you for this and helping me Missouri. I don't know if I could have got this far without you," Sam told her giving her a hug.

"If you need me child, you call," Missouri stated sternly. "You are a remarkable young man that has seen more than most in their lifetimes. The roads ahead for you and your brother may be rough, but you will be able to handle it, especially with your brother at your side. You let him help you and don't shut him out. You know all he wants to do is keep you safe and help."

"I know; he's what keeps me sane and on the right track."

"You go on in and I'll pick a few vegetables for you to take. I have more than I can use, and I bet Bobby would enjoy them."

"I'm sure he would. I'll take these on inside and see if Dean needs any help," Sam nodded strolling toward the deck as Missouri watched him.

She had done all she could to help the boy, she just hoped it was enough. She had a feeling the road ahead for the siblings was going to be a hard one, but she had confidence if they worked together, they would survive whatever the Fates threw at them.