As expected.
This whole topic made Yi sigh every time. Innerly though, he wouldn't let his concern to show. Truly a closed door. Yasuo did as if everything was fine yet it was so obvious in in voice and expression that the opposite happened. And he understood Yi knew too, for that ashamed gaze just after.
Now it followed him, not so peaceful. Difficult to stay passive like that when he knew his friend had some serious issues but he had no other way.
Along the pain Yasuo must bear all day there was also his own, very faint but present. The latter wouldn't tell him about it, probably because he couldn't trust that much. It wasn't so nice to realize that friendship could dull over time or maybe it was merely not that deep. Yasuo had spoken of his problems on rare occasions but it was nothing too serious. Never. And now he stayed silent.
Well, not exactly silent since he was still himself. The only time he seemed to go a little more quiet was when Lily came around, trying not to scare her.
After lunch and a not gloomy at all washing, they were free for the afternoon. To do nothing. Really, Yi almost forgot what he used to do when alone on sundays. To have a guest was really changing, even if it meant searching for privacy sometimes. Not too harsh, at least.
But he found an activity for the afternoon, to keep Yasuo busy. Maybe that way he would be less sad and get tired enough for that night to fall asleep in no time. Funny thought, about planning this like for a kid. No, just joking.
It led them to this, sitting in the living room, mug of tea nearby. Since Yasuo had planned nothing for his 'escape' in another city, he had to see what he needed now, what he forgot at home and wouldn't try to take back.
Actually, it was Yi's idea to sit down and take time to make lists. Secretly it was for his own worry. What a risk to go in a new city with barely a bag of clothes for a week or two. At least Yasuo's priorities came to make him grab the 'essential', laptop, phone and toothbrush.
He wouldn't go far with only that.
Another sigh came up, from Yasuo again.
« I know it's boring but it's also very important. » He reminded him, insisting on that last point.
« Yeah, yeah… »
Sprawled on the couch with little care, Yasuo had his laptop nearby. This was Yi's suggestion to have a list and keep it for later.
For now they were thinking about what he needed right now, that Yi could potentially lend if he had it available. Like towels.
« I think you'll need more clothes. At least something for when you go outside. Winter isn't over yet. »
Small chuckle answering this. It had Yi looking up, to find the latter grinning.
« Ya know I don't feel the cold ? I don't need that. » Smiling like the idiot he was sometimes. An idiot that couldn't get sick, as he said.
« I remember this very well but I keep my opinion. I did my part, now if you catch a cold it will be your own fault. »
« Aww, you worry for me ? »
What about that look ? Yi gave up, it wasn't his place to force the latter. He's warned.
And yes, he worried.
« Yes but for more serious reasons. Your current situation isn't really stable. »
Unexpected effect, it had Yasuo to go quiet, sitting up on the couch. When he met his gaze, there was indeed something else, meant to be burried deep but he was that good at this. Is that wrong to say ?
Maybe it reminded the latter that indeed he just ran away from home and so he thought about his family. Maybe. Yi berated himself innerly for not being careful enough, if that was the issue.
« I'm sorry, for all this. You don't need to worry for me, I'll survive. » Not as loud, just thoughtful.
In fact Yi was wrong, it wasn't exactly what he thought. Yasuo averted his gaze, looking by the window as sort of distraction. This was the new side, what he never really noticed before. The fluster, on some occasions. It also happened on this topic, about Yi's help.
Peculiar, to see Yasuo trying to focus on anything else. It would seem like a lie but there was nothing said, just honesty.
« You know I worry for everyone close to me so it's useless to tell me that. I understand your situation and I just want you to avoid the problems I faced. »
It didn't help a lot, Yasuo still averted his gaze, a bit tense. This was where it led to have a nice conversation turning deep without knowing why or how. It just happened. Probably it was because the latter lived that situation right now, it was an actual matter.
« Thank you. » It sounded really shy, something rare coming from Yasuo but it came back often since they met.
Just before he was so confident and playful, where did that go ? Yi wondered quietly. This was what he meant by 'less loud'. Sometimes Yasuo got stuck in instants like this one and it just made it more obvious. Truthful.
« No problem. Again, this is what friends are for. »
« I know but really, thank you. I had nowhere to go and you let me stay. »
This time Yasuo was looking at him, not so relaxed but he seemed to make an effort to be normal. Such a different side of the troubled youngster, the part that was lost and seeked attention. All this time Yi thought he knew him enough but a part remained hidden before.
What could he answer to this ? It was really soft to say, in repressed desperation for anything.
« In a similar situation you would have done the same for me. There is nothing wrong in seeking help. »
« We would never know. But yeah, I'd help as much if I could. »
Still sweet to hear. They maybe never went to discuss difficult topics but they could count on each other. Yi thought how much it would have helped to know someone when he moved in this new city. Again, it was useless to dwell on the past, it would change nothing.
Then the topic went dead, after talking quite honestly. Silence settled while both focused on their task.
« I have a scarf. Promise me to wear at least that when it's cold outside. »
Out of nowhere but since he was lingering on this, might as well close the question. The gaze he directed to Yasuo was meant to be determined, no way around.
« Okay, okay, I won't fight you on that, you're too stubborn. »
That laugh came back and it filled nicely the room. Yi prefered it this way, when Yasuo didn't look or sound too sad.
Better.