Hello people! :-) Just a few words before my fanfiction will start. This is my first story in years, but I've always loved Lily x James stories and when I read a few of them again, I felt like writing something new. You need to know that English is not my native language (it's German btw), so there will probably be some grammatical mistakes along the way. I hope they won't be too bothering while reading the story.
Also this is a story about Lily and James getting together - not them being together. I love drama a lot and I'm not exactly good at writing the happy parts. But I'll try to throw in some less tragic content here and there ;-)

And now: have fun reading and feel free to leave your review!

"The pain that you've been feeling
cannot compare to the joy that's coming"

- Romans 8:18

It was supposed to be one of the first spring days of the year and the sun was slowly rising above the houses of their neighborhood. Lily Evans stood in her old bedroom, which had been her escape for the past few weeks. She looked around the room that was so familiar to her, yet she felt utterly out of place. The sunbeams coming in from the window lit every corner of the small room.

For a second she considered closing the blinds and climbing back in her bed, hiding between the sheets until the day was over.

But she had already spent most of the last two months doing so and she had promised her mother that she would do some grocery shopping with her today.

Ever since Lily had moved back in with her parents, they had been great. They

try to push her, didn't ask any questions about what had happened.

However, one night, about two weeks after she came home, Lily couldn't hold back anymore. She woke up in the middle of the night, shaken up by one of the many nightmares that were still haunting her to this day. She had tiptoed into her parents bedroom and they were immediately awake, like they had expected her to come sooner or later. And then she spilled everything, it all came crashing down at once. They stayed up with her until the next morning, listening to her and comforting her as good as possible. And when the sun came up, Lilys tears finally dried down.

They helped her getting all of her stuff from her apartment to her old bedroom and ever since then, the moving boxes were standing still. She had only touched them to get out some of her clothes, everything else was still carefully wrapped up. Just like she had wrapped up her life and dreams in them and touching them again would remind her of what her old life. The one she was trying her hardest to forget.

Yet she was still thinking about it everyday. She could still feel the anxiety, the panic and the feeling of helplessness. It was surely getting better, step by step. For the first time in a really long time, she could finally breathe again. She was hoping that maybe - in the end - everything would be ok again.

She had always wanted to be a teacher, ever since she was little. She gave private lessons to friends and sometimes even strangers all through Middle School and High School. She loved helping others. That's why it had always been sure thing for her to go to a College after school to get her teaching degree. And when High School finished everything had played out just as she had planned. She had a college place at a university not far from home so that she could come back almost every weekend to see her family and some of her High School friends.

The best part about it was that her boyfriend - Ryan - was going with her. He was also going to study for a teaching post and since they had already been together for a while, they had decided to get an apartment together. Everything seemed so perfect, just like in those movies. Unfortunately the romantic comedy turned into a horror movie somewhere along the way and it took Lily way too long to finally put an end to it. In fact she had probably gotten away just in time.

"Lily, can you please come down? Here's something you should see."

Her mothers voice interrupted Lilys thoughts. She threw another glance at clear blue sky outside her window and then made her way downstairs to the kitchen. Her father was sitting at the table, reading a newspaper. Her mother was standing behind him, holding up a letter.

"This came for you this morning."

Lily noticed that her parents were a little bit tense and she figured that it was most likely because of the letter in her mothers hands.

For a moment she wasn't so sure if she actually wanted to grab the letter, her mother was still holding in her direction. The fear of what it could possibly be got her scared stiff.

Her mother seemed to sense Lily's worries because suddenly her face brightened up and she gave Lily a comforting smile.

"It's from NYU."

With those words all feelings of dread fell from Lily and she hurled in her mothers direction to snatch the letter from her hands. It took her only a few nanoseconds to free the letter from its envelope and for her eyes to scan the words it said.

And with every word Lily's smile widened more. This was what she had been waiting, hoping, wishing for. This was her ticket to turn her life around again, to escape from her past.

"I'm in. They accepted me. I will study for the bar, starting next semester. I made it, Mum!"

Lily couldn't hold back her tears anymore. They were tears of joy. Both her parents pulled her in a hug and for the first time in for what had felt like an eternity, Lily was feeling the slightest feeling of joy again.

After what had she had been through, becoming a lawyer had been one of her main thoughts. She had loved her studies to become a teacher, but now that just didn't feel like the right thing anymore. She really wanted to do something that could help those, who couldn't help themselves. Defend those, who didn't have anyone in their corner. A lot of people were scared to ask for help and she wanted to be there for them. Just like she would have needed someone.

This letter seemed to be the prospect of change that she had been hoping for.

From now on everything would finally be ok. There wasn't a single person in the world who could come in her way anymore. Right?

For now that's it. The next chapter will of course be a little bit longer. I just needed this little introduction to get the reader into Lily's mindset.

Hope you enjoyed and have a great weekend :-)