Chapter Thirty-four
Dressed in her softest pair of thoroughly faded blue jeans and a black tank top, Erin steps out of room number eighteen and into a chorus of car doors opening and closing amid the deep voices of several men; the sound of productivity. In a pleasant contrast, the chirp of youthful voices hums cheerfully at her back; the long lost sound of childhood innocence.
As the teams of adults discuss who will be going to which town for their particular scavenging missions, she can hear the three youngsters through the opened door of Kelly's room as they decide who is going to be the dog, the car or the thimble – the only pieces left in the Monopoly game they had found on a shelf in the motel lobby.
The sun shines down from the Eastern skies as she carries two bottles of water over to Amy, seated on a lawn chair in front of room number seventeen. She hands one bottle to her friend who responds with a soft Thanks. "How's your head today?" Erin asks her quiet friend, concerned with the headache Amy had suffered through yesterday while she and Carol had foraged the motel's commodities as the men were scavenging the town.
"Better now."
"That's good. But I still want you to take it easy today. No handstands or half-marathons," Erin teases, referring to their shared passion for running and their chronic joke of doing apocalyptic sprints.
The goodhearted smirk that accompanies Amy's eye-roll is a welcome change to the remote stare Erin had seen too many times since they'd found her friend walking in a shock-stricken stupor two days ago. Being around the kids yesterday had done a world of good in bringing her back to the land of the living. She definitely seems to have a little more spark in her today. Thank God. Because as much as their rescue and reunion has helped Amy, her singular presence has gone a long way in lifting each and every one of the group. At their darkest hour, she had come along to give them hope. Whether she knows it or not, she is there to remind them of that; that no matter how cold the night - the sun will eventually come back to warm you.
Erin hears the voice of her own special sun as Rick talks to Daryl about today's trip with Morgan and Michonne – who insisted she could not sit on top of the camper staring out at the parking lot of the motel for another day. Erin turns toward Rick's voice. After yesterday's hangover he looks good, really good, standing tall and determined in a ruggedly sharp plaid button-up of black and yellow lines crisscrossing over a sea of dark red. His blue jeans cling nicely to his muscular thighs and sag just a bit in the seat from the weight of his gun belt.
Erin watches Glenn take shotgun in T-Dog's jeep as a head full of dreadlocks climbs into the pickup truck. Finishing his conversation with Daryl, Rick glances her way and she knows he is itching to get on the road himself. I hear ya, babe. After spending a full day in the car and then an entire day in the motel, she can't wait to get away.
Though their quarry camp wasn't spacious by any means, it still carried a freedom and freshness that was mourned the moment they hit their first roadblock. They may have been confined to the small patch of land on that ridge, but it felt much different than being stuck in the midst of mortar and blacktop, no matter how sleepy the town.
When she settles into the passenger seat of the Honda five minutes later, the excitement of actually seeing the cabin and its beautiful lakeside weeping willow feels like finding a pony under the Christmas tree. And having Rick all to herself for the day is the frosting on the holiday gingerbread house. A thin stripe of anxiety about the trip to Manchester shades her enthusiasm a bit, but the eagerness of her little flutter surpasses any uneasy feelings and she gives him a bright smile as he fits the key into the ignition.
"Ready?" he asks.
"Oh yeah."
"Good." He reaches over the console and she watches him press the power button for the radio. "I thought you might need another friend on this mission so I brought your buddy Bruce along for the ride." A steady drumbeat and then the lively chords of Springsteen's guitar fill the air as the first notes of 'Rendezvous' leap from the stereo speakers.
"Oh my God!" She squeals with delight as she gives him a brilliant smile. When he begins to sing the lyrics, her smile immediately transforms into a wide gaping grin of astonishment.
"I had a dream our love would last forever." His beautifully smooth tenor voice fills the car right alongside of Springsteen's.
Completely taken aback, but incredibly delighted, she turns the radio volume down slightly to hear more of Rick's voice over Bruce's.
"I had a dream tonight my dream comes true,
and if you'll hold me tight
we'll be riders, girl, on the night.
Ooh, I want a rendezvous."
"Wow," she breathes, amazed that he knows the lyrics to the song. She sings along softly, mouthing the words back to him in a whisper so she can hear Rick's voice clearly.
"Haven't I told you, girl, how much I like you.
I got a feeling that you like me too.
Well if you hold me tight,
we'll be riders, girl, on the night.
Ooh, I want a rendezvous."
He gives her a proud wink and puts the car into drive as the final verse carries them out of Lincoln Park.
"I can't believe you know this song," she says. "Where did you get it? I didn't think you cared for his music."
"Well he's no Johnny Cash but he's okay," Rick replies as Bruce begs his lover again and again with the last licks of the guitar. "I found it yesterday in an old Chevy and played a few songs over and over to learn them for you. Drove Daryl crazy." He laughs and Erin can imagine the reticent hunter scowling at Rick as the music repeated. "Thank God they were fairly easy songs to learn," Rick continues. "He was ready to throw it out the window by the fourth round. Good thing he likes you so much," he finishes, glancing at her as he puts his hand on her knee.
"Yeah, he's a fan of 'The Boss' too so that was probably the main reason he didn't toss it," she says as a few quick thumps of Max Weinberg's drum brings the song to an end.
After a couple of seconds of radio silence, another song begins and she recognizes the evocatively rich keyboard of another one of her favorite songs. She smiles brightly when Rick begins to sing once more.
"Dream baby dream,
dream baby dream,
come on and dream baby dream.
"We gotta keep the light burning,
come on, we gotta keep the light burning,
come on, we gotta keep the light burning,
come on and dream baby dream.
"Come open up your heart,
come on and open up your heart,
come on and open up your heart,
come on dream on, dream baby dream."
Relishing in the thoughtfulness of the moment, she hums softly along as she opens the glovebox to search for the CD case. Pulling out the slim plastic square, she finds a homemade set of songs from somebody's iTunes collection. Scanning down the list, a few titles catch her eye and she wonders if Rick had noticed the recurring theme in the song selection.
When the song ends, she forwards to number six and turns in her seat to give him a sweet auspicious smile as she waits for Bruce's voice to come back to them. As the rhythmic hope of the old butterscotch Fender telecaster echoes off the dashboard, Erin puts her arm along Rick's shoulder to stroke his nape during her serenade.
"Grab your ticket and your suitcase
thunder's rollin' down this track,
well, you don't know where you're goin' now
but you know you won't be back."
She ignores the funny look that Rick shoots her and continues to sing her heart out – at full throttle and way off-key. What she lacks in talent she makes up for in spirit.
"Well, darlin' if you're weary
lay your head upon my chest,
we'll take what we can carry
yeah, and we'll leave the rest.
"Big wheels roll through fields where sunlight streams,
meet me in a land of hope and dreams."
"God, you're awful!" he laughs as they drive over the Flint River.
"I know and I don't care," she says, grinning happily despite his critique.
He turns the volume up to deliver the reins back to Springsteen.
She sings even louder.
"Well, I will provide for you
and I'll stand by your side,
you'll need a good companion now
for this part of the ride.
"Leave behind your sorrows
let this day be the last,
tomorrow there'll be sunshine
and all this darkness past.
"Big wheels roll through fields where sunlight streams,
meet me in a land of hope and dreams."
She sees him wince painfully hard when she hits a spectacularly bad note and they both laugh in good spirits as the tires eat up the road toward Manchester.
Three hours later, Erin looks out the window as the thicket of tall trees rush past in a sea of green and brown. The forest closes in on both sides of the narrow dirt road leading up to the cabin, but it doesn't feel suffocating or oppressive like some wooded areas tend to be. She feels protected, welcomed by the lush foliage that sways in the wake of the car as Rick steers toward another sharp bend.
As the car veers right, inertia pulls the box on the back seat to the left and she hears the crackle of tablets and capsules rattling around inside the small pill bottles piled inside the box. They had gotten lucky at the cancer center with only a few walkers in their way and a nice assortment of medical supplies to be found. Rick had dealt with the walkers easily and it didn't take them long to locate and raid the pharmacy and stock room.
The woods finally open up to a clearing and though she'd never been to his cabin outside of their dreams, she feels like she is coming home.
The small glimpses of rich golden brown logs that she had seen through the frothy branches of her dream willow tree had given her just a hint of the structure before her now. Nestled among the peaceful trees and pretty wildflowers, an attractive little cabin sits quietly along the bank of the scenic lake. The cabin is quite small but its gabled roof with a two-tiered pitch above a small dormer adds character to the modest building.
Though the wraparound porch with its two chairs facing the water is extremely inviting, the sight of the great willow tree pulls her from the car before Rick has the engine turned off.
Rushing up to the huge rock – their rock - perched on the lakeshore, she slows her pace to reach up and brush her hand along the sweeping tendrils of the tree. Their soft leaves caress her palm as she walks by, gazing up at the green splendor. Reaching the rock, she instinctively steps around to the other side to find the squat tree stump needed for the boost to climb onto the surface of the large flat stone. Standing in the center and looking out over the still water with its reflections of grand trees and white fluffy clouds, one singular notion comes to mind; This is exactly what dreams are made of.
She hears Rick climbing up behind her and a moment later his arms are circling around her waist, pulling her back against him. As real as her dreams had felt at the time, they aren't even close to what it feels like to be here in his arms right now.
"Hey look, there they are," he says softly behind her ear as a family of ducks waddles into the water across the lake.
She leans back and tilts her head against his jaw, snuggling into him and feeling indescribably content. "Yup, all five of them," she teases as the littlest duckling rushes out from behind a tree.
He chuckles against her hair. "I see him."
"It's so peaceful here, Rick."
"Yeah," he replies softly. "Too bad we can't all fit in the cabin," he says with a sigh. "You want to see it now?"
She turns in his arms and winds her fingers into the thickening hair at his nape. "In a minute," she whispers before lifting her chin and softly pressing her lips to his. "Thank you for bringing me here."
"My pleasure."
"It will be," she breathes against his lips with a smile and he kisses her gently, keeping his mouth to hers with just enough pressure to convey his affection and holding the moment dear without striking the match to set it on fire. She knows that will come later.
When he covers her mouth completely, she parts her lips and strokes his tongue in a delicate dance between two souls created to cherish each other. His mouth is gentle as his hands rest casually on her hips, not restrained but relaxed as her flutter basks cozily in the warmth of his love.
His kiss is long and lazy and perfect and powerful, harnessing time and tranquility as the world drifts away in the fading echo of one little duckling.
When he finally pulls back, he leans his forehead to hers as she breathes deep, treasuring this moment. With the hot sun on her back, her hands curl into the fabric covering his chest and she feels like they've come full circle, realizing a dream that began a long, long time ago. God I love you, Rick. Though she doesn't say the words aloud, she clearly hears the soft whisper of his reply.
"I love you back, Erin. Always."
She leans back to smile into his eyes. "You heard me," she says in a voice tinged with awe.
"Loud and clear." He gives her a quizzical look. "Was I not supposed to?"
Wrapping her arms around his shoulders she hugs him tightly. "Of course you were."
She feels his lips press hard against the base of her neck before he says, "Alright, Red. Let me show you the cabin."
Her flutter beams brightly when he takes her hand to lead her home.