This is it.
Chapter 13-One Year
"So that's nine including your kids. Anyone else you want to invite?" Olivia asks as she goes over the guest list for their son's first birthday party. Elliot lays beside her with Jacob hoisted in the air above him, laughing infectiously. Olivia can't but smile at their antics. It amazes her at how quick they were able to establish a bond despite their initial time apart. She guesses there is really something to be said about blood. "Elliot," she calls again.
He lowers Jacob into the space between them and sits up. "Let me see?" he asks and she passes him her laptop. "Looks good to me."
"I was thinking of inviting a couple of kids from the park."
"Why? We don't know those people."
"But he does. They're his friends. He plays with them almost everyday when Michelle brings him to the park."
"If you want," he shrugs.
"Mama," Jacob says and reaches for Olivia. She pulls him into her lap and hands him his blanket and pacifier. It is almost noon and past his usual naptime. They've spent a lazy Sunday morning in bed with cereal and toys and laughter as they work out the final details for Jacob's party.
Elliot watches her and it still amazes him how natural she is with him. "You're an amazing mother."
"Thank you."
"No really. I always thought you'd make a great mom, but you've far exceeded anything I thought you would be."
"Thanks."
"Did I ever tell you I always wanted you to be the mother of my child."
"Really Stabler. You saying you knocked me up on purpose?"
"No, but I always knew you'd make a great mom and I always wanted to be apart of that somehow."
"Well you got your wish."
"I did. Liv," he calls.
Olivia looks up from their son who's eyes have already begun to droop as she rocks him gently. "Why did you let me me in so easily? With Jacob I mean."
"I thought you knew me well enough to know the answer to that question."
"I know you had issues growing up without a dad, but I don't know. I've been thinking a lot lately about how much I missed and when I finally decided to get my head out of my ass and step up to my responsibilities you didn't fight me on anything. You didn't keep him away from me. You didn't limit my time with him. Why?"
"Why does it matter? I mean should I not have?"
"I'm not complaining or anything, just wondering."
"Because you're his father. Don't get me wrong Elliot, my first instinct was to punish you by making you fight me tooth and nail to see him, but Michael reminded me that no judge would ever say no to you. And in the end we'd both end up losing a bunch of money fighting a losing battle in court just so I could be spiteful? It didn't make any sense. Still, I thought about it. A lot. And I remembered how much I wanted you to be a part of his life in the beginning and how much it hurt me that you chose not to. And there you were finally offering everything I wanted. It didn't make sense to keep him from you. Plus I knew that I would be doing Jacob a disservice. I love him. He's shown me a love that I never knew existed and there's nothing I wouldn't do for him. I would lay down my life for him any day any time. He deserves everything and anything and it's my job to give it to him. Despite every negative trait you may have, you're an amazing father and Jacob deserved that. He deserved to have a father like you."
"He's an amazing kid, Liv."
"I know," she smiles. "I wanted him to have a relationship with you and I wanted him to have that bond that you share with your other kids. That meant he had to spend time with you."
"Thank you, for being so forgiving and so open to letting me be a part of his life."
"It was a no brainer. I know what it's like to grow up without a father and I always promised myself that I would never do that to my child and when you showed me how serious you were about being a father to him, how could I say no?"
"You could of. Not a lot of women in your position would have been so open to me being as involved as you allowed me to be. You never said no to me taking him for a night or a few days. That had to be hard. Being apart from him like that."
"It was, but I knew it was the right thing for Jacob. When I was sick, you being there for me like that and stepping up the way you did made me realize how amazing you are. The things you said to me then also made me realize we're family whether either of us like it or not and because of Jacob we always will be."
"I love you, you know that."
"I do and I love you too."
"No, beyond Jacob. You. I love you. You're an amazing woman."
"Thank you. Where's this coming from?"
"Just…As his birthday gets closer I just keep thinking about what an ass I was and how much I missed. I mean I left you to go through all of that alone. The pregnancy, after... All that time he spent in the NICU. I should have been there with you."
"I'm not going to lie, it was hard for me to forgive you for that. Some days I still don't."
"But you've never held it against me. And I don't know why. I feel guilty. All the time, and your kindness. Your openness to letting me in, just makes me feel guiltier."
"Don't. You're here now. You're apart of his life now and that's all that matters. Now. We can't change what happened in the past we can only move forward. So let's just keep moving forward."
He holds out a hand to her. "Will you keep moving forward with me?"
She links her fingers with his. "Try and stop me."
xXx
"Happy Birthday to you…" The crowd sings.
Olivia holds Jacob on her hip as she sings to him and with a smile on her face. A year ago she wasn't even sure if he would live. Now here he was in her arms happy and healthy and loved. On the other side of him Elliot stands singing along with a smile on his face. All of them in matching red Elmo shirts. The crowd consists of the squad and Elliot's children along with Casey and Melinda. They look on happily as they continue to sing. Finally they reach the part where they're supposed to blow out the candles and Elliot and Olivia lean over with Jacob between them and blow out the number 1 candle that sits on top of Jacob's Elmo shaped cake. The crowd cheers and claps once the candle had been blown out and Jacob smiles and claps with them, unaware that the celebration is for him.
"Smile!" Maureen exclaims and Elliot and Olivia stare straight ahead with genuine smiles on their faces as Maureen snaps a few photos with her phone.
"We good?" Elliot says through clenched teeth when the photo shoot seems to take longer than it should.
"Yes. I got some great shots. You're going to love these, Liv."
"Send them to me?" Olivia requests.
"Way ahead of you," Maureen replies.
"Alright who wants cake?" Elliot asks and a chorus of Me's come from around the room.
"Wait, I need pictures of you guys cutting the cake."
"C'mon Maureen," Elliot groans.
"Nope, I've taken over Jacob's baby book since Olivia keeps forgetting to print pictures off her phone and we need a cake cutting photo."
"Better do what she says," Olivia chuckles.
"Fine." Elliot concedes. He stands with Olivia and poses for the obligatory cake cutting photo. "There, we done now?"
"Yes," Maureen smiles cheekily. "Carry on."
Elliot goes to work cutting the cake and putting pieces on Elmo themed plates.
"I have some ice cream in the freezer," Olivia announces. "Fin, Can you hold him?"
"Pass the rug rat over here," he reaches for him and Olivia hands the baby off willingly. She grabs the ice cream and the scooper and she and Elliot go to work sharing cake and ice cream to their guests. The party continues on with presents and Maureen continues to take pictures as Jacob plays with the wrapping paper that once covered his new gifts. He plays with his siblings and attempts to eat his weight in cake ice cream. He's passed from person to person and Maureen makes a point to get a picture of him with everyone while Elliot and Olivia look on happily.
He slides his hand to settles on her waist and kisses the top of her head. Olivia loses herself in the moment and leans into him. Until she catches Lizzie staring at them and she immediately straightens. "Not now," Olivia says as she removes Elliot's hand from her waist. She ignores the disappointed look on Elliot's face and walks back into the kitchen and busies herself with random dishes.
"Need some help?" Maureen asks.
"Huh? No I got it. Go back to the party."
"You know you're not wrong. It's ok for you and Dad to show a little PDA here and there."
"Not when your brother and sisters are around."
"They're gonna have to get used to it at some point. Might as well start now."
"I don't want to hurt them. I already broke up their parents' marriage. The least I can do is try not to rub it in their faces."
"You're not rubbing it in their faces. Look, you guys did a bad thing, but we're family now. It's time that we all get past it. You deserve to be happy and believe me they will be ok. Well, maybe not Kathleen, but you gotta take Kathleen with a shot of vodka. I do." Olivia laughs. "Go, stand with dad and enjoy your son's party. He's only going to have one first birthday party and you don't want to miss anything because you were doing dishes while trying to avoid my brother and sisters."
"Alright. Thanks, Maureen," Olivia says and hugs the her quickly before going to stand beside Elliot. Slowly she slides an arm around him and he grins when he pulls her closer.
xXx
Elliot walks around with a trash bag in hand as he picks up the remnants of their son's first birthday party. Olivia places Jacob in his crib and uses a wipee to remove the remaining traces of red frosting from his face and fingers. He barely stirs. She pulls the door closed half way then goes to join Elliot in the living room. She collapses on the couch, exhausted from the day. Elliot collapses beside her, exhausted as well.
"Long day," he sighs.
"Please, you barely did anything."
"What are you talking about? I hung the banner… and helped with Jacob… aaaannndddd… did I mention the banner?"
"Yea, and I had to redo it because it was crooked and set up everything else. Thank God Maureen came early to help out."
"You act like I was totally useless."
"That's because you were." He pokes her in the rib and she laughs. "I'm glad you were here."
"I'm glad too. A year ago I didn't think I would be."
"I didn't either. That reminds me, can you hand me that manila envelope on the bookshelf?"
He stands and grabs the envelope then hands it to her. "What is it?" he asks.
"Open it," she instructs. He sits down beside her and opens and pulls a paper from the envelope. It reads:
Certificate of Birth
Jacob Issac Idris Stabler
Mother: Olivia Marie Benson
Father: Elliot Robert Stabler
"Really?"
"Yea, you're his father Elliot. You deserve to be on his birth certificate and he deserves to have your name."
"Thank you. Idris, huh. You're really keeping that name."
"I'm really keeping that name. I like it. That paper is bullshit by the way, just a symbolic gesture, but I figure we can fill out the paperwork and file it together on Monday."
"Yea, I'd like that. I'm keeping this by the way. I'm going to frame it and put it on my wall."
"Please don't."
"I'm gonna. But, something's not right…"
"I'm keeping Idris on there. I don't care what you say."
"No, your name."
"What about my name."
"It should be Stabler."
"What?"
He locks eyes with her and looks at her seriously. "It should be Stabler."
She shakes her head. "No, Elliot. Things are fine as they are. Marriage is going to change things. It's going to change us."
He grabs her by the leg and pulls her into his lap. "I love you, Olivia. Nothing is going to change that. And I want you to be my wife."
"Elliot," her eyes fill with tears. "We can't."
"We can."
"What about work? What about your kids."
"We can rock, paper, scissors on who has to transfer out."
She laughs and swipes away her tears. "You're so stupid."
"Stupid in love."
"You did not just say that," she laughs as she swipes away her tears.
"I did."
"SVU is my life."
"I guess I can transfer out. Finish up my twenty and retire."
"Retire? Why would you retire?"
"Liv, with a jacket like mine? They're never going to promote me. I can retire with full benefits and get into something else. I hear bounty hunting pays well." She laughs again. "Or maybe I can start a business or something. I always wanted to own a bar. Or maybe be a PI."
"A bar. Who's gonna watch Jake at night when I have to go to crime scene and last call isn't until 2?"
"Ok, maybe PI would be more fitting. I don't know. We'll figure it out."
"What about your kids? They don't like me, Elliot."
"They loved you once, they will love you again."
"I don't want to hurt them," she shakes her head.
"My kids are stronger than you think. Besides, they love Jacob. You're his mother. They have to love you too. It's science."
"Science? You're full of shit Stabler."
"Yea, but you love me."
"I do. I do love you."
"Then say you'll marry me. We'll do it on Monday and change your name at the same time we change Jacob's."
"You don't want your kids to be there?"
"I do, but they're not ready for that. They're not there yet and I don't want to wait. We'll tell them when they are and have a real ceremony and everything when the time is right. In the meantime it can just be us. No one else will have to know."
She sighs. "Ok."
"Yea?"
"Yea."
He smiles then and pulls her into a deep and meaningful kiss. "I can't wait to be able to officially call you Mrs. Stabler."
"Mrs. Stabler, I think I kinda like the sound of that."
"You better, because I'm not going to have it any other way."
"There's something else in there I thought you'd like too," she nods towards the envelope.
Elliot reaches into the envelope and pulls out a sonogram. "Is this Jacob?" he asks. He admires the black and white image. He can tell it's an early sonogram since the baby's features are not yet visible. He looks at the date to try and make out just how far along she was, and freezes when he recognizes it as being from the week prior.
"You're not."
"I am."
"How?"
"Well remember that time I told you I missed a pill and you said one pill wasn't going to do anything. Then swore you would pull out, but didn't? Well…"
"Wow."
"Yea, you and your super sperm Stabler."
"Super sperm," he grins. "I like the sound of that."
"I bet you do."
"So how far along are you exactly."
"Twelve weeks."
"Twelve weeks?! Why did you wait so long to tell me?"
"Well, when I first realized I was pregnant it was still really early, and I was scared. I thought I was going to miscarry. And I'm still scared. Elliot, anything can happen."
"Nothing is going to happen."
"Seriously, Elliot. What if it happens again? I don't think I can go through all of that again."
"It's not going to happen, and if it does this time I'm going to be with you. Every step of the way."
"You promise?"
"I promise. He slides her off his lap and stands. "C'mon," he says and reaches his hand out to her.
She takes it and he pulls her to stand before leading her down the hall to her bedroom, but surprises her when he closes the door and pins her against it. "What are you doing?" she laughs.
"Making sure it's a boy."
"You know that's bullshit right? The sex has already been determined."
"Still fun."
She laughs into his kiss. "You're full of shit Stabler. Besides. I want a girl."
"I already have 3 girls, Liv."
"And I have none. I already had the amnio done at my last appointment. So we'll know when it's a boy or a girl in a few days."
"You had an amnio done and didn't tell me."
"You would have tried to talk me out of it, and I want to know if something is wrong with this baby."
"No more baby stuff without me. Ok?"
"Ok."
"Pinky swear," he says and holds out his pinky to her.
She hooks her pinky into his. "Pinky swear."
"Great. Now, where were we?"
"Sex," she answers and slides her hand into the front of his jeans.
"I see the hormones are kicking in. This is going to be fun." He presses her back against the door and covers her mouth with his. "Can we name the baby Elliot Jr.?" He asks. Her face says it all. "Ok, we'll work on the names."
"I like Jasmine for girl."
"Jasmin's nice," his says before pulling his red Elmo shirt over his head. "Still think Elliot's better."
"In your dreams Stabler." She moans when his lips fall to her neck. She pulls off her matching shirt as well and smiles. "I love you."
He smiles back. "I love you too."
Fin.
So I noticed the other day that we passed the 100 mark on the reviews and I didn't get a chance to do my usual double chapter posting celebration gift that I usually do soooooooo. To make up for it, I decided to do something special. You'll know it when you see it. ;D