Alice was waiting for me, when we returned to the lodge. I noticed that she had changed into another one of her dresses, a yellow petty coat with big white and gold flowers. "How was your hunt?", she asked, approaching us quickly and stopping only a few inches before me. "Apparently nobody has ever told Emmett that one shouldn't play with dinner", I commented and instinctively evaded the punch he was throwing at me for it. "You are such a bore", Emmett teased and followed Edward inside. Looking down at my mate, I realized that she was buzzing with excitement, even more than what was usual for her. "What has you so thrilled?", I raised an eyebrow and placed my arms around her waist, pulling the petite vampire closer, now that we had some privacy. The physical touch increased my perception of her emotions even further and I enjoyed her joy as it washed over me. "Patience, Jasper. You'll find out eventually. For now, I want to go down to the seashore. Will you accompany me?", she replied, looking at me with her big golden eyes. As if I could ever refuse her. "It would be my pleasure ma'am."

We paced ourselves on the way down, but we still were at the shore faster than any human possibly ever could. Alice was clinging to my arm while we strolled along the shore, dancing down the footpath at my side. I loved the way she moved. Everything about her movements was light and airy, as if her feet didn't even touch the ground. My stride on the other hand, was a harsh opposite; sharper and heavier. As a major in the military, I had quickly learnt to hold myself in a certain manner that fit my station. This included walking with a straight back and exuding confidence, as if I always knew exactly where I was headed – even if this was not the case.

The sun had already disappeared behind the horizon and the moon was lighting our path, while the soft sound of the waves crashing against the cliffs and the trees flowing in the wind painted a beautiful scenery. I truly enjoyed being here with my angel, even though I couldn't shake the feeling that there was a purpose to this spontaneous stroll. We crossed an incline and I realised, that our path would take us down to the small stone beach. "Oh Jasper, please, let's go swimming", Alice suddenly said, halting for a moment and turning towards me. My eyes were focused on the beach. The water would probably be deadly to humans: freezing and with some strong currents. But nothing a vampire couldn't handle. "I'll be right behind you", I finally agreed and watched, as Alice turned into a blur before my eyes and ran downhill.

I reached her just as she was dropping her dress, revealing her new bathing suit – or 'bikini' as she had told me. After being with her for more than two years, it was no surprise to me that she had already known we would go swimming and thus dressed appropriately. However - to me - the appropriateness of the attire was discussable. The top and bottom combination left little to the imagination, and in my time, 'scandalous' would not have been strong enough to describe it. But this wasn't the late eighteen-hundreds anymore. Alice had taken her time to explain that this was à la mode right now when she first bought the piece and presented it to me. I quietly shook my head at the sight, unbuttoning my dressing shirt, while she already headed towards the water.

We didn't stray too far from the shore and my feet were still touching the ground, when Alice threw herself into my arms and I realised, that there were certain advantages to this bikini as well.

Later, I was laying with my back in the sand and Alice arranged herself on top of me, her head resting against my chest. "They are marvellous, aren't they?" she suddenly asked, tracing one of the crescent shaped marks on my shoulder. Noticing my irritation, she quickly added: "The Cullens, I mean." Well, that made a lot more sense. "They make you happy, that's all that counts in my eyes", I replied, running my fingers through her wet hair. "That's not what I want to hear, and you know it", she objected, raising her head and now looking straight into my orange eyes. "Why not, it's the truth", I teased but quickly changed my answer as I felt her annoyance, "I'm sorry, love. Yes, they are amazing. Maybe a bit too trusting for my taste but very kind."

Alice chuckled and paced a quick kiss on my nose. "Too trusting? Need I remind you that you were following me without asking twice only hours after we first met?" – "That's different. I didn't have anything to loose or fear from you. The Cullens on the other hand…", I remarked, not stating exactly what I was thinking. Alice knew. And she didn't like it one bit. "You are not going to hurt them", she objected, her voice now stern and louder than before. This was not a request but rather a statement and I left it at that. I didn't want to fight with her about an eventuality that would probably never occur. But just for the case that it did, I would always have a strategy ready to protect my angel and keep her safe.

My thoughts were interrupted by a sudden and intense sensation of hatred, that was not coming from me. It was Alice, which was even more surprising as she hardly ever got angry. "Sorry, I didn't want to upset you", I apologized immediately. However, I had this feeling that her anger was not directed at me. "It's not you, Jazz. Sometimes I just get so angry at what that woman has done to you. You shouldn't have to think about all the ways something could go wrong, when all it really does is go right", she explained and her expression softened, as I calmed her anger. "Don't be angry. I am not. And you shouldn't be either", I said and gently kissed her forehead. "How can you not be angry?", Alice replied, now sitting up. I sighed. Apparently, this topic had her all worked up and I knew that she would get even more upset, if I used my gift on her right now. Thus, I fought down the urge to reset her previous joyous emotional state and sat up as well.

"Look, she might have forced this life upon me but how could I be angry at her, when this life also gave me you", I explained and took her hands into mine, "And besides, now that I have you, I am only starting to truly understand her. I don't dare to imagine, how it would feel to loose you…" Alice's anger subsided and her smile returned as she gently placed her hand on my cheek. "This is never going to happen, Jasper. You are not going to loose me", she softly assured and placed another kiss on my lips.

Once we were more or less dried off, we put our clothes back on and returned to the lodge. With every step, Alice seemed to bounce more and more, her excitement increasing. I smiled at her behaviour and slightly shook my head: "Are you sure you don't want to tell me, what's going on?" But Alice was adamant. I would have to wait and see. A few minutes later we emerged from the forest and found the others sitting in front of a bonfire outside the house. My angel let go of my hand to take a seat on the bench next to Edward. I sat down next to her, taking the last available seat on the bench as I scouted the emotional canvas of the scene. The whole group mirrored Alice's emotions nearly perfectly, especially Esme, Carlisle and Emmett.

"Alice, Jasper, we just had a discussion and we decided that we would like both of you to join our family permanently. If you still want to?", Carlisle announced and suddenly everything made sense. Alice's excitement, why she had led me away from the lodge, and why she had been so eager to get back here after our swim. "Yes!", she exclaimed and immediately started to hug everyone, starting with Edward and Esme, who she enveloped simultaneously with her slim arms. I stayed put and just dwelled in all the happy emotions, when Carlisle approached and sat down next to me. "Thank you for this", I said, holding out my hand to him. The older vampire smiled and shook it: "We are glad to have you. Both of you."

Alice was buzzing with energy and joy throughout the rest of the night and the following days. It was a pleasure being around her and I savoured every moment of it. "Carlisle and I are going out to look for mountain lions. Would you like to come along?", Edward shook me out of my thoughts and I looked up from my book. "Right, we are still waiting on your answer on that whole grizzly vs. mountain lion question", Emmett pitched in immediately and I held up my hands defensively. "Hint received, I'm going." Quickly placing my book on the couch table, I followed the other two out the door when Alice appeared and stopped me, putting a finger on my chest: "Not that shirt!" I could hear Emmett burst out laughing, as she pulled me into our room, offering a different shirt.

I quickly changed into more appropriate hunting attire and placed a short kiss on her lips before following Edward and Carlisle outside. They both were looking at me with amused expressions on their face but didn't comment on the situation, when I ran past them and directly into the woods. Once again, we made our way up towards the mountains and Edward took the lead. Only two days had past since the hunt with him and Emmett and I might have been able to handle my hunger for another day or two, but I saw no good reason to torture myself more than was inevitable. Therefore, I didn't hesitate to follow the trail I picked up, once Edward and Carlisle had already found their prey.

I had just found the mountain lion and was crouching, ready for my attack, when the wind carried over another scent. One, I would have never expected here and that immediately attracted all of my attention: blood. Human blood. The carnivore in front of me immediately lost all its appeal and my feet took me into the direction of the intoxicating scent as fast as they possibly could. I reached a small clearing and came to a stop, staring at the drops of blood in the fresh snow. Instinctively, I dropped to one knee and reached out with my hand. The snow didn't dissolve by my cold touch but when the red substance touched my tongue, I felt as if my whole body burst to flames. It was as if I had been deprived of air for days and finally was able to breathe again.

Having tasted the blood, the scent now seemed even more prominent and I scrambled to my feet, running towards the source of this heavenly temptation. Or I was, until something hard slammed into me, sending me flying towards the next tree. I landed on the ground and immediately got back up to my feet. Filled with rage, I lashed out at my attacker and managed to grab him by the shoulder, slamming the blonde vampire to the ground. My other hand found his chin and I was about to rip his head off, when another attacker came at me from the side and threw me back. This time I landed on my feet and immediately rushed forward again, when someone grabbed a hold of my arms and managed to hold me back.

This attacker was extremely strong, and I struggled hard against his iron grip when the other two approached us again. "Jasper, snap out of it!", the bronze-haired one ordered and took a hold of my right shoulder. A deep growl came out of my throat and I tried to get my teeth into his arm, but he was quick enough to elude my bite. Somewhere, in the back of my mind, my training told me that the blood's distraction would be my end. But starved as I was, I didn't notice, I didn't care. Until they managed to wrestle me to the ground, restraining my arms and legs. In this moment, the realization hit me hard: That was it. I spent so many years wondering how my new life would come to an end, sometimes even hoping for it to finally be over. But now, I had Alice and all I could think about was her. What if my death would break her?

I struggled harder against the hold and suddenly my head came free and I was looking straight into my angel's eyes. Was I hallucinating? "Jazz, Jazz, please calm down", I heard her voice and the fog in my mind cleared. Slowly getting out of my blood rage, I realised that she was very much real and the three vampires holding me down were Emmett, Edward and Carlisle. "Alice?", my voice was rough, raspier than it usually was. "You can let him go now", Alice instructed but the pressure on my limbs didn't change. "Are you sure?", I recognized Emmett's voice. "Yes, please let him go", my angel confirmed and I finally felt myself free again. "I am going to see if the hiker needs help", Carlisle announced, running off into the direction of the scent that filled my mouth with venom. I need to get out of here, I realised, and immediately started running into the opposite direction.

I didn't stop until a came across an elk cow and its calf whom I devoured without hesitation. However, this was only a drop on the hot stone that was my thirst. My throat was blazing like it hadn't in a long time. And the animal blood was just disgusting. Staring at the mess I made, I let myself sink to the ground. "Jasper?", I heard Alice's angellike voice followed by her steps, as she approached me from the side. She sunk to her knees next to me and gently started to run her hand through my hair. "I nearly decapitated Carlisle", I mumbled after a moment, not being able to bring myself to look at her. It was enough to feel her pity, I didn't need to see it in her eyes. "But you didn't, Jasper", she tried to reassure me and stretched out her hand towards my chin.

However, I was not really in the mood to be reassured and ducked away from her touch. "Jazz, please look at me", she now pleaded, and I clenched my jaw. "Please Alice, stop the pity. I can't take it right now." She sighed and moved, eventually straddling my legs. "Fine. I'll wait right here for your self-loathing to be over", she returned and my traitorous corners of my mouth slightly moved upwards as I saw the determination on her face. "That's better", she now smiled as well, the sight shattering whatever dark thoughts I had. Sighing, I gave up and wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her close. It was just impossible to ignore her presence. "Are you sure, you don't want to talk about it?", Alice asked softly and ran her hand through my hair again. I leaned into her touch and closed my eyes for a moment, just enjoying her gentle strokes while I started to sort my thoughts.

"I'm sorry I messed up", was all I finally said and Alice sighed. "I'm sorry as well Jazz. I should have seen the hiker… I should have stopped you from going with them", she now apologized, now making me the one who sighed. "Please, don't put this on yourself. No one, especially not me, expects you to see everything", I returned, looking directly into her eyes. "Plus, I don't see how assigning blame is going to help." That last addition seemed to be a good argument, since all Alice did in response was lean forward and kiss me swiftly, before getting up and holding out her hand: "Let's go back to our family."