So... I may or may not be out of practice for this story. I apologize.
After what had happened in the classroom, Naruto went home.
For a time, he didn't do anything but cry and try to drown out the mutterings of his shadow. He didn't know what it was or if it could hurt him, but it still deeply unnerved him in its near-unintelligible mutterings. He cried and screamed, then hiccuped when he could cry no longer.
And when he tired of this cycle because crying would do nothing, his attention was drawn to the little honey book that he'd very nearly forgotten.
It ensnared his interest, urging him to open its pliable cover and read all its contents. Had he been in in a lucid state of mind, he would have thought this to be odd, (as he almost never found joy in the written word.) But as it was, he wanted an escape from his turbulent emotions, a distraction.
So, he dragged himself up from his bed and retrieved the thin book.
Its title was too faded to read, and opening to the first page, he saw a scrawl of fancy calligraphy, handwritten and... changing?
Before his very eyes, what used to be on the page had shifted to address him. This would have normally alarmed him, but somehow it was like he had expected this to happen. Like it was completely ordinary.
'Hello, Naruto.
I know we were never there for you, but please know we loved you will all our hearts before we died. We loved you so, so much; and we're sorry for doing this to you.
We've left you our legacy, detailed our family techniques for you to learn. Please take care of this book in our place, and do your best! Life gets better, just you wait!
Your parents, Minato & Kushina.'
Though Naruto couldn't cry again after his last episode, his puffy eyes stung with the emotion.
He had a family. They hadn't wanted to leave him on his own, they weren't nobodies like everyone said, and they had loved him. But then, that didn't make any sense, did it? Mr. Shinohara had clearly told him that God didn't love him, the monster that he was. The Kyuubi, whatever that was.
Did that mean he was wrong? But how can you be so wrong about something like that?! Didn't that make Mr. Shinohara and his God wrong?
So... so God really did love him! He wasn't unlovable, it was just that Mr. Shinohara's God had misled the others. That made so much sense!
Turning the thin, dry page, the little blond started reading its contents hungrily. It described somewhat dark techniques in detail, of its linkage to the god his parents and grandparents had worshipped.
Of Jashinism.
He didn't want the other villagers to continue worshipping their false god that spread lies if they kept doing others harm. So maybe they'd listen to him if he introduced them to Jashin. He'd heard of 'Messengers of God' at various small churches established around the village, and he had never met another follower of Jashin. So didn't that make him the Messenger of his God?
He felt his excitement rising, finally finding a renewed sense of purpose. He might not want to be Hokage if the villagers were so stubborn and mean, but that didn't mean he wouldn't continue his family's legacy!
But a particular facet of Jashinism and the techniques he was given was it doing harm to others when he was harmed. He knew he could heal fairly quickly compared to others, (his eye was proof of that,) but he didn't think that such intense techniques would work too well against enemies if he could easily die from his own skills. How did one remedy the issue of mortality?
Flipping yet another page, it was like the book had read his mind!
Written in the same dark brown lettering as everything else, was the detailing of a ritual claiming to grant temporary immortality by the power of a sacrifice to Jashin. That made sense. It'd be weird for a god to not expect something in return for their love and gifts.
But he didn't really want to kill someone else.
He knew this was irrational, because of course ninjas have to kill. He was young and a bit unlearned, but he was not stupid. But he wanted so badly do follow after his parents, to experience what they did and were unable to share with him.
The easiest solution he found was to use those in violation of Jashin's doctrines, those that deliberately did him or the village harm. He didn't know how he would figure out who intended to do what, but he was determined.
So, when the sun was close to setting, he set off to find his first sacrifices; (he refused to think of them as 'victims' because how could going to Jashin be a bad thing?)
He passed by plenty of people, real and not, all of whom spat nasty words at him. Some were weeping, others intensely angry. Their emotions gave him whiplash. None of them were optimal though, because he'd read that the ritual required many people. Now that he thought about it, how was he going to get as many people as he needed? He didn't have the storage space or money to collect them one at a time, and he doubted he'd get too many volunteers.
It had to be in one night or it wouldn't happen.
But this being a ninja village, he doubted a pre-genin like him would be able to go totally unnoticed in his plan, especially since the majority of the population belonged to a clan.
The easiest solution was to catch them unawares, where they can't fight back, (because let's face it, there was no way he'd win against professionally trained adult ninjas.) And to make them cooperative? That was simple: chloroform. He knew of its effects and knew that it was way out of his price range. But logically, he also knew that you could make anything. There has to be a way to make it, right?
He changed directions to make the library his destination. He'd have to be sneaky about this, (but when didn't he when it came to the things he wanted?)
He'd never actually been in the library before, (from a combination of lack of interest and a barred entrance,) though he was sure he could find a way through one of the side entrances, right? He'd find out.
One of the librarian's assistants was stationed at the front desk as he assumed was usual, and he didn't bother trying to sneak past them. He wished he could henge into someone else, but they'd only just started learning about how to feel and manipulate their chakra. So that was a no-go.
Alright, alright. No biggie. He'd just go to the side as he'd planned. Or... he could try heading straight through? Side entrances, in his experience, were usually locked.
He had to wait for someone else to approach and dashed past them, hoping his jumpsuit didn't attract too much attention. He just had to get in and get out. Simple!
Thankfully, libraries were apparently kept very quiet. That was all the better for him, because now he could easily tune out the dark whisperings of the shadows. He focused on searching for possible places to find what he wanted. He couldn't ask for help, so the easiest thing to do was scan through the categories at each end of the shelves.
At least then he would be able to hide in the shelves.
He wouldn't say that he found the book he needed quickly. He had to sort through various irrelevant science books, then narrowed his search down to medicinal texts. From there, he had to go to scientific innovations to anesthetics, (something he figured was probably related based on the definition he found.)
It was a long, drawn-out process in which he only found his desired book by pure chance.
It was a book detailing the history and development of anesthesia, which was exactly what he was looking for. He took it from the shelf and flipped to the index, (a trick he'd learned when taking last-minute notes,) then searched for the first page that mentions chloroform.
It did tell him how to make it, (which was a bonus,) but it also told him that it took a long time to set in and was generally unstable. Whelp, that wouldn't work.
Then he looked up the set-in approximations of each mentioned anesthesia and came to an unfortunate conclusion: sevoflurane was his best bet, and it was only available in pharmacies.
Naruto was kind of on the fence at this point, not sure if the end would be worth the effort he was putting into this scheme, but a quick thought of his parents' notes spurred him on. He'd break into any damn place to get what he wanted, nothing to it. He'd done it before; it's not like this was new.
So he ditched the shitty book after ripping the page out, (wouldn't want to forget the name,) and headed out to the nearest clinic. Which, you know, was the hospital.
Bad enough he was nearly dragged there the day before, but now he was going of his own volition?! He steeled himself for the inevitable shit-show that was about to go down. He knew that the place was a hub for ninja, and you can't expect every nurse and doctor to be a civilian.
But, he'd try his damnedest to get the stuff because he needed it.
That's how he found himself in one of the many storage rooms of the institution, surrounded by more chemicals than he could count, almost all of them meaningless to him; (hell, he probably couldn't even say their names.)
He was thankful that everything was neatly organized out of necessity and he quickly navigated his way to the things he needed, (though he noticed that sevoflurane was less well-stocked than the alternatives.) He didn't know how many he would need, (nor even the proper dosage for a person,) so he took quite a few containers just to be safe, leaving a few behind.
No doubt there was some sort of surveillance in the room, so he had to get out of there as quickly as possible.
He left with little fanfare, hiding behind the various fake potted plants and the patient carts scattered around the hallways. Somehow, he'd made it out okay and mostly undetected, which meant the plan was a success in his eyes.
He'd have to go back to the apartment for a clean cloth and necessary supplies, then scope out his first batch of sacrifices.
Truthfully, he didn't know what to look for in the non-followers of Jashin that would make them prime candidates for his ritual. He knew he needed a lot of people to kickstart it, then repeat once every month or so with much smaller sacrifices. Harder to become something new, easier to maintain a preexisting state of being, or something like that.
He also knew that Jashin wasn't fond of what was referred to as the "Six Deadly Sins." Obviously, they were things to be avoided if he was to be Jashin's follower, but he couldn't understand how that could help him in his hunt.
... Maybe he could just use the bad ones. The people who wanted to hurt him and Konoha.
He realized that that criteria made most of Konoha a prime candidate, but he had to start somewhere. But what he was positive of was that this all had to happen tonight. He was sure he'd already been spotted at the hospital; if he was caught before he could see this out, he was a dead man.
It had to be tonight.
An explanation: the note is not real. The book uses a genjutsu to tempt you into reading it, then a seal array reads your chakra and pulls from your memories to manipulate you into depending on it, making it more valuable to you. This ensures safety for the book and creates chaos, (its objective,) when you inevitably use the techniques it gives you.
I'm so sorry I left this alone for so long ಥ_ಥ
I also somehow forgot that I wrote the last chap, so I had to reread and can I just say, damn, I love how dark it is, even if that makes me sound narcissistic. Let's just hope I can update more frequently to get this show on the road!