HEY GUYS AND GIRLS. SORRY ABOUT THE DELAY WITH THIS CHAPTER. THINGS HAVE JUST BEEN TOO HECTIC FOR ME RIGHT NOW. LIFE IS SUCH A DRAG. THANKS AGAIN FOR THE SUPPORT. YOU GUYS ROCK. (SORRY ABOUT THE SPELLING MISTAKES AND THINGS LIKE THAT, I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO EDIT THIS CHAPTER)
HAPPY READING:)
"I wonder what Sakura-chan was talking about with Kakashi-sensei." Naruto said as he sat down on the couch next to Hinata while Choji sunk into the single couch. Shikamaru assumed his position behind his desk that was still cluttered with paperwork that he stopped when Choji entered the room.
"She didn't even greet us when she left. She must've been in a hurry." Choji was right now. He never knew Sakura to be impolite. They entered the room then she bowed and quickly left without so much as a glance towards the group.
"Maybe she had something important on her mind." Hinata always tried to see the best in people. Just like Choji, she hated killing people even when she was on a mission. She wouldn't willingly kill anyone unless that person wanted to kill her or anyone she loved. Just like Choji as well, when they wanted to kill someone then they were extremely terrifying. It was best to stay out of their way or risk being killed in the process as well.
"She still could've greeted us you know. We are her friends." Despite having Hinata, Naruto still pined after Sakura's affection but there was certainly no romantic reason behind it. It was probably just something that he hadn't grown out of. Maybe she needed to leave the village like Sasuke did before her and Naruto's relationship could mature.
"Shikamaru, do you know what's happening between Sakura and Kakashi-sensei?" The nervousness in Hinata's voice was still lurking even though she managed to turn it down. He thought it was gone but once Kakashi announced that Shikamaru was going to be taking over their mission then it returned again. He knew that Hinata had a problem standing up to a figure in authority, probably because of her father, but he also knew that her heart was in the right place and if she needed to break the rules then it would be for the greater good.
"I don't." He didn't want to either. He wanted to get as far away from Sakura as he could. He wanted to stay here in his protected bubble and focus on his work.
"You guys have a mission to prepare for. Don't let me down." He hoped that would get them out of their. They were his friends but he just wanted to be alone right now. He needed to drown in silence for a while before he could face the noise of the world. The only thing keeping him going was the thought of solitude and silence he could enjoy in the comfort of his own perfect paradise that is his office yet here they were, disturbing the tranquillity he desperately craved for.
"You know we won't Shikamaru. You can count on us." That was typical of Naruto. Always shining hope in the deepest and darkest places. Maybe that's why Shikamaru wanted him to be the hokage. He needed Naruto to awaken the hope inside him.
"We'll do our best Shikamaru." Hinata politely said as they stood up. She gave a quick bow immediately making Shikamaru a little uncomfortable.
"I will see you in a couple of days then Shikamaru." Choji gave him an approving nod before leaving the room behind Naruto and Hinata. He smiled as he watched his friends leave. They were a troublesome bunch but he knew he couldn't live without them. He needed them as much as they needed him even if he didn't show it. He took a deep breath then settled into doing his work. He could finally do the thing he set out to do; drown himself in the sea of work before him.
"You're here early Shikamaru." Shizune's voice jerked him out of his concentration forcing him to lift his head up and see the well known medic ninja standing in front of him. Tonton was in her arms as usual but the versatile creature definitely looked much brighter than she did yesterday. One could swear that the amount of time Shizune puts in to looking after Tonton was almost as if Tonton belonged to her and not her master.
"What time is it?" He tiredly asked. Shizune quizzically looked at young Nara sitting behind his desk. Shikamaru felt her gaze penetrating his body like she was doing a full work up examine on by just staring at him. He wouldn't be surprised if she was though. If Lady Tsunade praised her then she must be extremely skilful.
"Just after eight." He could hear the judgement in her tone as she answered him. "Have you been here whole night?"
"Yeah. I found something that I think Kakashi-sensei needs to hear." He stood up then picked up a few documents and a map that he was using last night.
"Where did you get those mission reports?"
"In the archives where you left them."
"Make sure you return them. We might need them again."
"I will."
"And who gave you permission to even take them?"
"You and Kakashi weren't here earlier so I took the initiative. It's not like I was messing around with them."
"You were supposed to go home and not take the initiative."
"We're doing our jobs to protect the village which requires attention at all hours."
"Well your body and most certainly your brain can't keep up being constantly active without a break." Tonton squealed her agreement with Shizune as the two ninja made their way out of the office.
"My body and brain are just fine. I will take a break when this mission is finished."
"You're turning out to be just like your father." That voice stopped Shikamaru dead in his tracks like someone controlled his shadow now. He knew exactly who that voice was and he confirmed it when he turned his head and saw his mother approaching them. Kurenai walked a breath behind his mother who had a clearly irritated expression on her face.
"Um... good morning mom." The nervousness in his voice was unmistakeable. He scratched the back of his head as the two women stopped in front of them. He suddenly felt like the smallest person there even though he was taller than all three women and definitely taller than Tonton.
"Mrs Nara, Ms Yuhi." Shizune gave them a bow then proudly stood next to lazy ninja.
"Shizune-chan, how are you doing?" Kurenai gave her a warm smile as she addressed the Hokage's assistant.
"I'm doing great. How are you and the baby doing?" That was always the main topic when it came to Kurenai now. How could it not be? Her belly looked like it was ready to explode.
"She has her moments but we're both doing fine. She's already making me tired though." The two females let out a small laugh while Yoshino continued staring at her son.
"Shizune, was my son here all night?" Shikamaru knew that his mother would get more information out of the medic ninja next to him than out of him.
"Yes. He was working on a mission apparently." All three females turned their attention to him. It didn't look like one of them agreed with him staying at the hokage tower to do his work. He could see where they were coming from. His body ached, his mind was tired and his words slurred a little. It wasn't logical to work through the night it seemed. He probably should've taken a break.
"It is important." He would be surprised if that defence actually worked. He didn't expect it to but it was worth a try. Any idea was welcomed right now.
"So is your health." Trust Shizune to play that card.
"Sitting in your office whole day is not beneficial to anyone, let alone yourself." Definitely a motherly thing to say. He waited for Kurenai to add anything but she didn't. It looked like she was going to let his mother take the lead on this one.
"I've eaten and I've taken in enough fluids. I admit that I am a little tired but I have work to do." He never thought that he would ever say those words. It was so out of character for him to do so but he wasn't the same anymore. No one was the same after the war.
"We don't care about your work, we care about you." His mother certainly switched gears there fast. He knew she cared about him like every mother cares about their child but she hardly showed it. She was more practical than that but Shikamaru liked that about her. He didn't grow up sheltered from the truth. He knew exactly what was going on and why it was happening. Hell, he was one of the only kids that knew Naruto had the nine-tails sealed inside him while they were in the academy. He was surprised that Sasuke didn't know but then again, Sasuke had his own problems to deal with.
"What's all the noise about?" Kakashi opened the door and was confronted with the situation in front of him.
"Hokage-sama." Kurenai and Yoshino immediately gave Kakashi a bow.
"Kakashi-sensei, I think I found the bandits next target." Shikamaru wanted to forget the conversation that he was having with the three kunoichi and continue with what he wanted to do in the first place.
"I handed that mission over to you. You have permission to do whatever you think is necessary." Either Kakashi trusted Shikamaru too much or he was just too lazy to take control of the mission himself. He did have a village to run so maybe he was just prioritising.
"It actually ties in with the other thing we spoke about yesterday." Kakashi raised an eyebrow at that statement. He was clearly interested now.
"Let's talk in my office then." The hokage led the way inside his office then settled behind his desk. Shizune quickly fetched a chair to allow Kurenai to sit down close to the desk then joined Shikamaru and Yoshino standing on the opposite side of the desk.
"May I?" Shikamaru asked Kakashi as he motioned to the map and his desk. The hokage nodded his head in agreement allowing Shikamaru to unroll the map across the desk. He then handed the documents in his hand over to Kakashi and took a deep breath before he explained.
"The documents I gave you are of three different bandit attacks on villages in different lands. Each attack consists of a small group of bandits but each group portrays a specific part of the plan that bigger group of bandits use when they attack."
"Are you saying that these bandits joined together?" Kakashi could certainly see where Shikamaru was going with this. He found comfort in the fact that the hokage could follow his train of thought.
"Yes. We don't know much about who those bandits were since the reports only indicate that they are a group of lowlife thieves. We can't figure out who they are but I think I have a couple of possible targets that the bandits might choose." Shikamaru began circling different points on the map as the three kunoichi and the hokage watched on.
"How do you know that they might attack these villages?" His mother asked the question the other three ninja were begging to know as well.
"The village I circled in the Fire Country that borders the Land of Grass is similar to the one that the bandits recently attacked. They might decide to switch to plan B which would be to attack this village. It's unlikely but not impossible and if we send ninja to that village right now then there will be even less of a chance that they would attack that village."
"I can have a team there before noon." Kakashi was certainly taking Shikamaru seriously. He was glad that the hokage didn't question his theory but that made him more nervous than relieved for some reason. If he was directing the Hokage then that meant he was highly ranked in the village right now and more responsibility rested on his shoulders.
"The other circles are in the Earth Country. Why do you think they would travel that far to attack when they can just choose an easier village from one of the smaller nations?" His mother was definitely going to grill him about his decisions. He was prepared for it though. He didn't stay up all night fooling around.
"The villages in the Earth Country all have a similar set up to each other and to the ones in our country and to the one in the Wind Country. All the villages are doing well and are wealthy compared to similar villages in the smaller nations. I don't think they would waste their resources attacking a village in the smaller nations when a similar village in the bigger countries would yield more profit. That's why I think that they would rather attack one of the villages in the bigger countries." Shikamaru felt confident in his reasons. Everyone else had their best poker faces on so he couldn't make out what they were thinking. Hopefully they agreed with his way of thinking.
"What do you think their next move would be Shikamaru?" Kakashi's stern voice held nothing other than authority. He wasn't playing around right now. Shikamaru knew that this was the breaking point. He was either going to win the trust and loyalty of the silver haired hokage or he was going to keep being seeing as the broken chunin.
The broken chunin, definitely not the worst choice. He was broken; hell, he felt destroyed. Having the whole village see him as such would allow him to laze around and do nothing without anyone questioning his motives. He could finally have the life he always wanted; stress free.
But why did he feel this inner sense driving him to do better. To prove to everyone that he can move on and can come out of this stronger than he ever was. Why?
The answer stared him right in the face; Kurenai's child. He wanted to make sure that there was a life of peace and comfortability not only for his sensei's child but for every child in the village. He didn't want them to grow up without parents or to lose their family due to war or some other senseless act of violence. He wanted to help spread the hope Naruto instilled in the village. He wanted needed them to inspire the hope in him so that one day he could also quench the thirst of love his aching heart desperately longed for. He found his purpose. He found his drive. All he needed was to find the person who could bring his devastated heart back to life.
"From the recent reports I've read and in planning their best possible route, I am almost certain that they won't stay any longer in the Fire Country than they need to and they wouldn't travel through the Land of Rain which would be the easiest and direct route to the Earth Country. They were able to attack a village in the desert in the Wind Country so their next move would be to move out of the Fire Country and go back to the Wind Country through the Land of Rivers. The desert will provide more than enough cover for them so they would be safer and they can easily overpower the border guards. They will most likely travel as close along the border as possible until they reach the Land of Birds and cross it into the Earth Country. From there they would choose one of the three villages and if they are not stopped by the first village then they would try another one before they make their way to the Lightning Country." Their it was, his well thought out plan. That's as much as he could plan with the little information at his disposal. He tried his best and he was satisfied with the effort he put in.
"Looks like Asuma was right about you; you would be a great hokage." Kurenai's words immediately made him want to tear up. He was glad, he really was. His mother looked at him with a smile on her face that only spoke volumes about how proud she was. Shizune gave him a nod of approval while Tonton had somewhat of a smile on her chubby face.
"You're welcomed to take over my job. Your father was the one that put me here in the first place." He couldn't tell if Kakashi was joking or not. Maybe it was because of his tiredness. He wasn't focused on that though. His mind kept replaying Kurenai's words in his mind. He remembered Asuma telling him that and all he thought about was having Asuma there at that moment. He would probably have his stupid grin on his face as he stood behind Kurenai sitting on the chair. That image made his aching heart tremble with joy.
"You can always appoint him as acting hokage if you and Lady Tsunade are ever out of the village at the same time." His mother was always looking for ways to give him more work and being the hokage, even if it was only for a day or two, was the mother-load of work. He was glad that his mother trusted him enough to rule the village.
He still wasn't sure about his plan. There was a lot of things that could go wrong. He could be wrong about it as well. This whole thing could've been one big coincidence. The only person he wanted to talk to about it was the one person he could never defeat and the one person he never will; his father. He never spoke to his father that much after he became a chunin. His father was the Jounin Commander so it should've been expected that the two of them would hardy cross paths during their work. They would have breakfast and dinner at home but even then they would hardly speak to each other. They found comfort in each other's silence but his mother always encouraged having light hearted conversations when they ate so they were forced to join or risk feeling Yoshino's wrath. The only time they were allowed to be quiet while they ate was when his parents were having a fight. The only problem with that was that the silence wasn't comfortable. It slowly made him more and more uncomfortable so he tried getting out of there as fast as possible even if it meant coming up with stupid excuses like cleaning his room. He missed those moments though. He missed his father.
"Doesn't that go without saying?" Shizune's words snapped him back to reality.
"I would think so." Kakashi didn't know the extent of Shikamaru's employment either. They didn't exactly have a written document to say what his role here would be but he was sure that everything would work itself out in the end.
"Shikamaru, what does this have to do with the continuation of the Allied Shinobi Force?"
"Those bandits are made up of various criminals from across the ninja realm. They attacked a village in the Wind Country and the Fire Country and are looking to attack a village in the Earth Country. If we had the Allied Shinobi Force then we could address this issue easily and figure out a way to deal with these bandits together. We could also use that platform to help each village grow together so that one village isn't left behind while the other villages prosper. Together we were able to win the Fourth Great Shinobi War."
"That's a strong argument Shikamaru. What is your plan?" Looks like he was getting good at convincing the hokage. Hopefully he could be just as good at convincing the other Kage.
"I want to start working on sending letter to the Kazekage and Tsuchikage informing them of what I expect the bandits to do and to propose a joint mission between our three villages in order to stop the bandits. I also want to start working on a letter to send to all the Kage proposing a joint meeting that we can send out after the mission with the bandits. That way I can address all five Kage together about the continuation of the Allied Shinobi Force." He laid all his cards out on the table now. There was nothing he was hiding so if Kakashi was going to shut him down then now was the time to do it.
"You've done enough for today Shikamaru. Go home and rest." He definitely wasn't expecting Kakashi to tell him that. He was waiting for a reply to his plan. Did he like it or not?
"With all due respect Kakashi-sensei; you put me in charge of this mission and I want to make sure that it's done properly. I need to inform Gaara and..."
"Go home Shikamaru; that's an order." He could see Kakashi's eyes staring him down. He could feel the fear rising in him. He wasn't going to show it but it was definitely making his tired body tense up.
"But..."
"Shikamaru, you did good." This time it was his mother interrupting him. He turned to look at her and was surprised by what he saw. Her face shone with pride again. He was honestly confused by what was going on right now. He had work to do and no one was making sense.
"Shizune and I will take care of the mission and notifying the kazekage and Tsuchikage. You might've just saved a couple of villages Shikamaru. The only thing I need from you is to go get some rest so that you can come back here and continue keeping our villages safe." There was the answer he was looking for. That was all he needed to hear.
"Thank you Kakashi-sensei." He gave the hokage a bow then began making his way out of the office and across the passage to his office. He heard his mother and Kurenai greet Kakashi as well so they were probably going to go home as well. He quickly began sorting out his desk so that it didn't look like a hurricane passed through it. Fatigue was beginning to take its toll on him and he could feel it affecting his movements. He powered through it then turned around and saw his mother and Kurenai standing in the doorway waiting for him.
"You ready to go?" Kurenai asked him.
"Yeah." His tired response was a welcomed relief to his brain. Three ninja began making their way out of the elegantly decorated building into the comfortingly cool temperature outside. He quickly adjusted to the colder temperature then finally settled into slow walk besides his mother and Kurenai.
"Why did you leave so early yesterday morning?" His mother was clearly going to ask him the questions she could ask last night. He should've expected it. If his mother wanted to know something then she wouldn't forget to find out. His memory wasn't as good as hers, probably because he was too lazy to remember finer details when he wasn't on a mission.
"I had work to do." That was a safe answer. He didn't want to tell them the real reason. He didn't want to remember the real reason as well. Why did the one memory he wanted to forget plague his mind like an unrelenting pest?
"What happened between you and Sakura?" Kurenai was certainly more direct than his mother. He feared for her child a little. She would never be able to get away with anything when Kurenai was around. Hell, she wouldn't be able to keep a secret from Kurenai. That should be expected since Kurenai is one of the best genjutsu users in the village.
"Nothing happened. I walked her home then came home myself." Besides the kiss, nothing else happened. That kiss might as well have not have happened anyway. It just confirmed the answer his heart didn't want to hear.
"Took you guys long though." What was this? His mother and Kurenai were attacking him from both sides hoping to break him down. They didn't look like they were going to stop until they got it out of him. Troublesome women.
"We weren't exactly in a rush. We enjoy each other's company." He was getting irritated with this. Why couldn't they just leave him alone? All he ever wanted was a peaceful silence, was that so hard to ask for?
"I'm sure that's not the only thing you like about her." This felt like some weird version of good cop and bad cop. Kurenai's sly questioning and his mother's unasked questioning was tearing him down piece by piece.
"Where are you guys going with this?" Now it was his turn to ask them the questions. He couldn't be the only one being interrogated here.
"We were just trying to having a conversation with you Shikamaru." The way his mother said that made him sound like a bad guy.
"Such a drag." He sighed then slid his hands in his pants pocket and looked up at the sky. Cloudy but didn't look like rain. That was good. He could handle the cold but he didn't like the rain; not after the last time. He was surprised that the streets weren't busy. People were setting up their stalls and people were walking around doing shopping but it wasn't bustling like other days. Maybe the cold didn't agree with them.
"We have some news for you as well." Kurenai's word drew him back to the two older kunoichi next to him. "I am going to be living with you guys until I get a bigger place to stay for me and my child."
"Our compound is further from the hospital than your apartment. Why doesn't my mother just move in with you?" That would make more sense in case of an emergency.
"I only have one bedroom." He forgot about that. His brain really was too tired to think right now.
"You have a couch." That immediately earned him a hit to the back of his head by his mother.
"You are lucky I don't make you sleep on the couch." His mother definitely wasn't playing there. He remembered finding his father sleeping on the couch on more than one occasion despite having over enough bedrooms for him to go sleep in.
"Kurenai and I are going to do some shopping. You better be at home sleeping when we get there."
"Okay." He reluctantly agreed. He knew that his mother meant that as an order rather than a choice. He also knew that if he wasn't sleeping then she would physically put him to sleep herself.
"See you later Shikamaru." With Kurenai's, greeting they went their separate ways. His sigh of relief felt like it was lifting an unknown burden off him. Everything became clearer again. Then he remembered the meeting he had with Kakashi a few moments ago and he immediately altered his destination. There was only one place he wanted to be right now. There was only two people he wanted to see right now.
A short while later, he found himself standing exactly where he wanted to be visiting the only two people he wanted to talk to right now; his father and sensei. He looked at their graves and felt a rush of emotion explode inside him. Anger, regret, pain, heartbreak all mixed with pleasure, joy, peace and overall happiness. They really did shape him into the man he was right now.
"I miss you." He felt like he needed to admit it to himself. He never opened up to anyone about how he really felt after the war. Everyone could see his pain and anguish written all over him and they did their best to help him but he didn't want their help. He just wanted to be left alone but no matter how quiet he found it, he still couldn't find the peace he craved for.
Who would've thought that the content peace he would've given anything to find was in the eye of the storm? Who would've thought that in order to find himself, he would have to give himself up to the chaos of his mind?
He wanted so much for them to be standing in front of him so that he could tell them what he planned. He wanted to see their reactions to know if he did the right thing. He wanted to hear their voices so that they could soothe his questioning mind. He wanted to see their glimmer of a smile showing their approval. He missed them.
A touch of his hand immediately brought him back to reality. His mind registered the contact and he immediately turned around to see whose hand it was. There she was, standing right there in front of him with all her beauty screaming its presence.
"Hey." Her caring and sincere voice immediately made him want to break down. He wanted to feel her arms wrapped around him bringing life to his sleep deprived body.
"Hey." His voice sounded coarse. She could tell that he was holding back tears. She knew he never liked crying in front of other people. She hardly ever saw him cry himself but she wasn't going to let him go through it alone.
"What are you doing here?" She knew it was a stupid question seeing as whose graves he was standing in front of.
"I thought I'd stop by here on my way home. Haven't been here in a while."
"You okay?" Two simple words that he couldn't truthfully answer. He wasn't okay. He never was going to be okay ever again and he was okay with that. He learnt from a young age already that heartbreak and pain was going to get harder to deal with the longer he became a shinobi. He also knew that the best way to deal with it was not to feel any emotion. Just push everything to the forgotten corner of your mind and continue with life.
How could he do that when the pain came along with the enjoyable memories? He never wanted to forget his sensei or his father but the pain of wallowing in his memories of them were too much. He wasn't okay but he was still alive.
"Yeah." Not a complete yes but not a no either. More like a hopeful yes to show that he was getting there.
"I am here if you need someone to talk to." He almost laughed at that statement. He was just waiting for her to use an excuse to get away from him right now. Maybe she could use Ino as her excuse this time. Maybe she promised Ino that she would help paint her nails or something.
"What are you doing here?" Why was she there anyway? The hospital is very far from here. Hell, he was surprised she was this far from everything. She was a doctor so there could be an emergency at any time so she should've been closer to the hospital.
"I know that you might not want to open up to me but I know what you're going through. Just talk to me." He couldn't help but scoff at her words.
"You don't know what I am going through. You have your father. Your family is complete. You have don't have one sensei but you have both sensei's still alive and well. How can you possibly know what I am going through?" He hated his explosion of emotion but he wasn't lying. She couldn't have known what he was going through.
"I also went through the war. I watched as comrades died in front of me. I held peoples lives in my hands and I couldn't save some of them."
"Yet you came back home to a loving family and a ninja realm that hails you as a hero. Hell, you have everything. You have your parents, your sensei's, your teammates, your friends, your career as a medic ninja grows by the second; what don't you have? What could you possibly want that you don't already have? What is it that you don't have that can possibly be standing in your way of happiness?"
"You."