Okay, if you don't already know, then the crowd funding campaign for Frostbite is starting tomorrow on Indiegogo! Look there or facebook or twitter oe anywhere on the internet to find out more info, and let's bring Eddie and Adrian and Janine to life! ;D

Until then, time to fix those mother/daughter conflicts. I hope I managed to do this justice. Either way, it's a huge chapter- 6000 words without A/Ns. Enjoy :)

24th May - 28 days to go until wedding.

Luck was on my side the next morning, because on leaving ward duty I practically ran into Janine leaving the gym. The fact that she appeared to be tired from an intensive workout was also in my favour, as though it wouldn't improve her mood, it might keep her from killing me.

"Janine, have you got a minute?" The look on her face was the same one that appeared on Rose's whenever she was about to try and lie to me. "I saw that you've got a break before your shift starts."

Her expression of being caught red-handed was tempered by the annoyance she clearly felt at my preventing any escape.

"A minute, yes. I'm very busy at the moment."

"Yes, Rose told me."

Janine turned on her heel, heading back towards the gym building.

"I have a feeling I know where this is going, and I'd much rather have this discussion in private. It's nobody else's business," she glared at the Guardian who was loitering, causing him to duck his head and hurry off. "Quite frankly, it's not your business either."

My self control snapped."It is, actually. Rose and I are getting married, whether you can accept that or not, and that means that everything that concerns her, legally concerns me. Regardless of that, I promised a long time ago that I'd do everything in my power to keep her from being hurt. That promise stands whatever of the status of our relationship, and includes protecting her from everything, even you."

Janine was stunned.

"Rose really does want you in her life, but it's difficult for her to open up and risk disappointment. She's let herself trust you again, but if you keep pushing her away like this then she'll push back harder, and you'll lose her for good."

I'd almost made that same mistake, and it had cost us both precious time and Mason's life. Rose's own and many others may have been lost had she not opened up to me about the darkness and the ghosts. Rose had built her walls after being abandoned as a child by her mother, and I hated to think what could happen now if Janine walked away again. I had no doubt that Rose would act like nothing was wrong, and would roll with the change to become even tougher, but Janine's dismissal was a blow to her psyche. I knew better than most the immense power parents held over their children, even after they grew up. I'd probably never truly get over witnessing what my father did to my mother, and what I did to him after that, but being Rose allowed me to make peace with my demons. I'd never be able to repay for her the service she did me every day in bringing me that peace and love; the least I could do was shield her from more pain at the hands of her mother.

Janine had been silent for a while as she thought over what I had said. All traces of anger had gone from her face now; replaced by a look of regret.

"I don't want to lose her," Janine said quietly. "That's the last thing I want. I just got her back. Losing her was what I was trying to avoid."

The last sentence was barely more than a whisper, but it was enough to make the pieces fall into place. Though I couldn't quite comprehend the logic of her attack on Rose, I could at least understand her motivations for it.

It's said that one often meets their destiny on the path one takes to avoid it, and in Janine's case, the same was true for the realisation of her greatest fear.

"Talk to her," I said. Though I was still angry at Janine for the things she had insinuated and the pain she had caused Rose, I knew that the time to tell her so was past. "Explain why you said what you said, and let her talk as well. I think you both want the same thing, but lack of communication is keeping it from happening."

"Will she forgive me enough to actually let me talk?" Some of the signature Hathaway defiance had crept back into her voice, but it showed just how little Janine really knew her daughter if she had to ask that question.

"Start with an apology, and she'll listen. Rose has the most amazing capacity for forgiveness."

I left Janine to then, giving my parting words a chance to sink in as I headed to the front had to report for duty. Rose was near-guarding Lissa this afternoon, but I knew the Queen had plans to spend the 3-hour shift shopping online for clothes. Lissa had informed us that she'd booked the accommodation and flights for our honeymoon, but that she wouldn't give us exact details on where we were going until just before we left the States for Russia. She'd wanted to keep it a secret until the wedding, but had been shot down by Rose's impatience and my own pointing out that we needed to know before so that we left so we could pack accordingly.

Rose had been trying to access the online gift register that Lissa had created to for the honeymoon 'extras', but hadn't succeeded. Despite her best attempts at hacking the system- which meant typing every possible variation of all Lissa's passwords over the years- she'd only succeeded in making her laptop crash. She was insisting that Christian must have set the password, and that his mind was strange for her to get into.

Something told me that Janine wouldn't go straight to talk to Rose, so hopefully she'd get to spend some time with Lissa before facing her mother. Rose hadn't wanted to be unprofessional by spending her guardian shift shopping, but Lissa had assured her that nobody would know, and that making sure that she had more than one swimsuit for the our honeymoon was more important that protocol.

My mind began to wander towards thoughts of Rose stretched out on a white beach, skin warm and glowing as she basked in the sunlight, smiling as-

"Belikov!"

I snapped out of my daydream as the Guardian I was relieving greeted me, and forced my mind to focus on the task at hand.

RPOV

"For crying out loud Rose, come and sit down!"

Lissa was getting exasperated because I wouldn't leave my post to go and internet shop with her.

"I'm sorry, your highness, but that would be unprofessional."

Lissa let out what was probably supposed to be a growl of annoyance, but sounded more like noise a kitten made when jostled in sleep. "When have you ever cared about being professional? There's nobody else even here- not even Guardians can see through walls!"

"Bikini shopping isn't worth your grisly death, your-"

"Call me 'your majesty' once more, and it won't be my grisly death you have to worry about!" When she wanted, Lissa could actually be quite frightening. I pitied any Royals that stood in her way with their petty oppositions to her ideas. "As Queen, I hereby relinquish you of your Guardian duties for the rest of the afternoon. Now, come over here before I have to order you to do it."

Pushing off from the wall, I rolled my eyes. "Alright Queenie, don't get your tiara in a twist."

"I'm a Spirit user, Queen of the Moroi, your maid of honour, and pregnant to top it all off. Antagonising me isn't wise."

"Well, I'm not wise. Except for when I'm making wisecracks, that is." I said as squeezed myself into the same seat as Lissa. It was big enough for two Moroi, but my hips hade it a bit of a squeeze. Thankfully Lissa didn't have a bump yet, or we'd never fit.

Lissa closed her current browser window that was displaying a pair of particularly shiny gold heels.

"There is no way that they were for me," I teased. "Is Court's shoe selection not quite up to Target's standards?"

Lissa blushed. "They're on clearance."

"Now that would show those Royals. Who knows- work by the Queen, Targét could become the next Stella McCartney."

Lissa rolled her eyes. "Now you're just being silly."

"You love me for it." I wrapped an arm around her shoulders, smushing my face against her cheek.

She tried to pull away, but was giggling anyway. "Save that for Dimitri. We need to shop!"

"Without the effort of leaving the room!" My gaze strayed to the kitchen, "and free food in close proximity."

Lissa ignored my food comment. "One of the many things that makes Court so much better than St. Vlads- unrestricted access to Internet shopping."

"Beats living in thrift store clothes, anyway."

"Why Rose, are you saying that you were actually bothered by the clothes we had to wear? I thought you said you were 'sexy enough to rock it anyway'."

"Of course I am," I said with mock indignance. "Forgive me for not wanting to wear clothes that people have died in. I've done that enough in my own clothes."

Lissa grimaced. "You were unconscious at the time though."

"Still wore them; whether or not I was awake to be grossed out by it."

She shook her head, a mixture of exasperation and trying to clear images of a bloody and twisted me from it. "Can we stop talking about the times you've died and focus on buying pretty new things?"

"Sure. But this is my honeymoon- I'm more worried about looking hot and sexy than pretty."

An hour later I was the proud owner of 4 pairs of shorts, 3 new tank tops, a beach wrap, some flip flops and sunglasses. Lissa was currently trying to convince me that I needed to buy a sundress.

"But it's so floaty!" was her great argument.

I gave her a look. "When have you ever seen me wear 'so floaty' without their being a cash benefit for it?"

She giggled. "I still can't believe Mason actually paid when you came as Princess Jasmine to that fancy dress party."

"It makes more sense in retrospect," I said sadly.

"Yeah, I guess it does. Sorry..." I remembered that Lissa had always know that his feelings for me went beyond flirtation and friendship.

Mason's death was weighing heavily on me lately, as I wished he could be there for the wedding. I turned my attention back to the screen, immediately spotting something that would allow me to change the course of the conversation without disrespect.

"There. That is my kind of sundress."

Lissa double clicked the link, and the image appeared bigger alongside a price that was surprisingly affordable.

The dress was just above knee length, white black paint splashes and purple orchids all over it. The halter neck strap dropped into a deep V, so fulfilled wishes of hotness whilst remaining cool.

"I think Dimitri will have trouble keeping the men away from you!" Lissa teased.

"Dimitri? What about me! I'll have to keep him off me as well." I sighed dramatically. "The woes of being well-endowed."

Lissa giggled again, adding the dress to basket before following a 'suggested for you' link to a dress that appeared to be made only of a wide crochet.

"They seem to have me pegged as some kind of whore," I deduced.

Lissa studied my face before responding. "You want it, don't you."

"Yes." She bought it. "As long as I wear it over a bikini, it doesn't count as slutty, right?"

"Right. Whilst we're on the subject of bikinis, we should probably look at some."

I had two currently; the red one I had worn camping and a navy one that was looking a little worse for wear. Not that I had worn it much, but the pool maintenance guy in Portland had apparently been a little over-zealous when adding chlorine to the water.

We had a laugh at some of the swimming costumes for sale, including one leopard print one with the picture of a snarling bulldog over the crotch, 'bad bitch' written across the cups.

"Is that really the message you want to be sending out?" Lissa laughed.

"Oh well. Some people complain about being labelled by the clothes they wear; anyone in this must be completely fine with that happening."

It seemed like everyone was online shopping for swimwear at the moment, as it was almost impossible to find something in the correct style, size and colour.

"This one would look gorgeous with your skin," Lissa said, clicking on a purple triangle bikini with bronze and gold studs and rhinestones on it. They had my size in stock.

"Yep, get it. I need to get a strapless one as well though so I don't get terrible tan lines."

Scrolling down the page, Lissa pointed out a black one piece. "That would definitely not be tan-line friendly."

My eyes widened as I took in the garment on the screen. "Don't care. Won't stay on long. No tan lines. Want it. Need it." I'd apparently been reduced to monosyllables.

Lissa looked at me to see if I was serious, judged that I was, then clicked on the link. The amount of fabric was much less than the amount of skin that would show, which added to the price made it a totally impractical purchase. I didn't care.

"If anyone can pull it off, it's you," Lissa said grudgingly, with a hint of jealousy. "But you still need to get something more practical as well."

The practical bikini turned out to be a peachy orange bandeau, understated and good value for money.

After checking the time on the screen, I pushed my feet against the floor and moved the chair Lissa and I were sharing away from the desk. "Right, shopping trip over- along with my shift. Do you want to come over and share some leftover pizza?"

"You mean the pizza that disappeared from my fridge this morning?"

"Um," the guilty look on my face was probably incriminating enough without me needing to say any more.

Lissa looked amused. "I'll pass, thanks. I have a proposal to review, and I want it done before Christian gets back."

It was amazing, but the guy had actually managed to find himself something resembling a full-time job in the development of defensive (and secretly offensive) magic. When not actively teaching others how to throw fireballs around, he was researching methods of killing things for both fire users and other element specialists, talking to people like Mia about collaborating in battle, and putting together everything he learned in a comprehensive report that would be the major deciding factor in whether or not defensive (and maybe offensive) magic became a curriculum requirement for all academy students and graduates.

Not bad for someone whose talents had previously not stretched beyond cooking and sarcasm.

Back in my own apartment, I was just about to reheat the pizza when there was a tentative knock at the door. Dimitri wouldn't be back for about an hour, and he wouldn't knock anyway unless he'd lost his key, so I was immediately suspicious. There was always the chance that another guardian had come to beg me to switch shifts- or, of course, that Strigoi were here. Though it was unlikely they would knock before killing me.

Gazing at my pizza longingly, I stuffed it back into the fridge before going to get the door.

What was waiting on the other side was even more malicious and twisted than a Strigoi.

"Hello mother. I'm sorry, but I'm in the middle of a pre-wedding detox which bans entering into any situations likely to make me feel angry or-"

"Stop being so melodramatic Rose," my mother sighed as she pushed past me into the apartment. I blamed my surprise that she actually had the nerve to come here again for the fact that I didn't push her right back out into the corridor. Upon a time, she'd punched me as I tried not to step outside a line. Now, she'd definitely crossed one, and I felt that I was within my rights to hit her. My fist clenched.

"I came to apologise."

That stunned me as much as any physical blow to the head. Lucky for me, sarcasm was a feature of my autopilot setting. "And what, you've since come to your senses and remembered that you don't know how?" I could see that she wanted to speak, but I didn't give her a chance. "A genuine apology requires some kind of conscience. I figured that your old Academy had trained that out of you, right along with any kind of maternal instinct."

"Rose." My last words must have stung, and I felt a flash of guilt before remembering what a bitch she'd been to me. "I really am sorry for what I said. Please let me try to explain."

She sounded so broken that gave in, just because of how strange this all was.

"Sit down," I sighed. "But if you insult me or Dimitri again, even implicitly, you're out. Understood?"

Janine was quiet for a moment, weighing up getting what she wanted and talking to me against having to hold her caustic tongue.
She nodded mutely, going to sit down on the sofa. I headed to the kitchen, silently opening a half-empty bottle of liquor that had sat in the cupboard untouched since New Year. I took a swig before stashing it away again and chugging some juice down to hide the scent of the alcohol. I wasn't on duty for 12 hours so it wasn't forbidden, (unless you counted the fact that I was underage) but it was pathetic that I felt alcohol necessary to get through a conversation with my mother.

As I walked back to the old hag, it hit me that whilst a confidence boost was needed, reduced inhibitions were not great when I was already having trouble not slapping my mother. Too late now, though.

I sat down in the chair opposite her, thinking how much bigger it felt without Dimitri sharing it with me. This was our usual spot when we were watching movies with Lissa and Christian, or just wanted to cuddle up close. Thinking of him made me wish that he was here as well, though I knew this was something my mother and I had to sort out alone.

"Well?" I asked. "Are you actually going to try and explain, or just sit there staring at me? I can't imagine either of them will have the desired outcome, whatever that is."

She leaned forward, the tension increasing as she closed the gap between us. "I've never been very good at talking you as a mother, which probably has something to do with the way mine treated me. Her relationship with my grandmother wasn't great either."

"Lucky that the cycle ends with me, then," I said dryly. The hint of bitterness that crept into my tone surprised me, and I brushed it off and blamed my mom's enduring ability to screw with my mind.

She didn't seem to hear me anyway. "When I got pregnant with you, I was so scared about telling her. It turned out that she thought it was the only worthwhile thing I'd done in my life." Thanks, grams. At least someone had wanted me. "She expected me to stay at the commune after you were born, and all but disowned me for sending you to the Academy and going back to Lord Szelsky." Her eyes burned into mine. "You probably agree with her, but I stand by my decision."

"So do I," I said truthfully. "I don't resent you for sending me to St. Vladimir's- not anymore, anyway. If you hadn't, I'd probably have stayed in the commune for the rest of my life." I was reluctant to say 'as a blood whore' as I knew better now, although from what I'd heard, my mom's family had fitted the definition better than the women in Baia. "I would never has met Lissa or Dimitri or become a Guardian. I love my job and who I am. What I've never understood was why you never visited."

"I tried-"

"Bullshit." I cut her off. "The last time you visited me was my 11?th birthday. The next year you sent a present and an apology, then the year after that a card that came late. Aside from the occasional comment I saw when I stole my disciplinary record, I didn't hear anything else until I died in a car accident, where you sent a cheap get well card. You didn't even write the friggin' thing- you let someone else do it."

I could feel old scars opening, pain bleeding from the newly exposed parts of my soul. Why was my mother always the one with the knife?

"I regret that, Rose, so much. I should have been there for you. But you must remember that nobody knew about the healing- the message I received said only that there had been a crash and that you and Lissa had sustained only minor injuries. I couldn't leave my charge at that time, as there had just been an attack. Before I knew it you'd run away."

That sounded fair, but it wasn't enough to excuse her lack of attention. All those stupid pranks I'd pulled, acting up in lessons, breaking the rules- it had begun as a ruse to get my mom to visit, and ended up as revenge because she hadn't. I'd made it my mission to try to sully her reputation with my own.

"But why didn't you come when I was younger? On my birthdays, or actually at any time? I didn't care about when it was, I just wanted to know that you cared enough to come."

There was that pained look again. "You understand how hard it is to leave your charge."

I nodded, thinking of Dimitri and Ivan, and remembering how I'd started off never wanting to spend a day away from Lissa. But since then I'd learned that sometimes it was necessary to take a break, or your performance would be compromised. Of course, the fact that I knew Lissa was constantly surrounded by 19 other personal Guardians made it a little easier to leave her.

"But I'm your daughter," I insisted. "Even if you couldn't come and visit me, you still could have called."

"I wanted to. Believe me, Rose, I wanted to call you. But it was easier not to."

"Why," I asked bitterly, "because I was such a little brat?"

"No." Something changed in her countenance. "Because if I spoke to you, heard your little voice begging me to visit, then I'd have to do it or be haunted by thoughts of you alone and upset. It was selfish of me, I knew that at the time, but I did what I could live with. By focussing on the job and distancing myself from you, I could convince myself that you didn't need me and spare myself the guilt if I was wrong. Eventually, enough time passed that I knew you must hate me and that you wouldn't want to talk to me. I was right."

I couldn't hold back a laugh. "That's fucked up."

She smiled wryly, the tears pooling in her eyes catching me off guard. It had to be a trick of the light, or maybe it was dusty in here. The apartment needed a good clean. "I know. I knew it then, too, but it was easier. It's the only way I knew how to do it. The first day I dropped you off at school and left, I wanted to turn around and pick you up again. It hurt so much to leave my baby there, and every time I saw you it was the same. I didn't get to see you growing up; all I saw was the evidence that time was passing and that I wasn't a part of it. I was jealous and didn't know how to deal with it. And then there was the fact that every time saw you, it was a reminder of your father. Then I left you, it brought back the pain of leaving him. I hated my job and my duty for costing me my family, and the only way I could remain a Guardian was to pretend that the sacrifice didn't bother me. Seeing you would have made that impossible."

"They come first," I repeated for the millionth time in my life, voice monotone as I mulled over what she had said. Admitting to weakness wasn't something that Janine Hathaway did lightly, so I knew that it must be the truth. It also made me feel a little more sympathy for her; knowing that I wasn't the only one who had been hurting all those years. She could have stopped it, though.

"In my mind, yes, I had to fight to make that so. But you were always first in my heart. I've only ever wanted the best for you."

The sentiment made it impossible not to call up one of my signature quips. "That's got to be the most poetic thing you've ever said."

Mom shifted to the edge of the sofa and covered my hand with her own. Despite my initial impulse to pull it away, I left it there. After what she'd just revealed, I finally knew my mother's side of the story behind my seeming abandonment. I wouldn't have done the same thing, and was still dubious as to the motivations surrounding every missed phone call and birthday card, but at least I understood. Mostly.

"So it wasn't because I wasn't good enough?" I asked quietly, the fear that had driven my need for approval since childhood. In retrospect, my attention-seeking behaviour had probably come at a cost to the chances of receiving approval from her. "It wasn't because you were ashamed of me, or resented me for ruining your life?"

A look of utter shock dominated my mom's face. "Rose, no! I never thought... never did I ever think any of those things- not after you were born, anyway. When I was pregnant I was worried about my career, but once you were born I knew that everything was worth it. No, sweetheart, the only person I blamed for not being good enough was myself. I know I've been a bad mother at times..." Her other hand joined where ours were already clasped.

I didn't bother to correct her with 'most of the time'. "The email you sent when I came back to school?" I asked.

She gave me a look. "I might not be the best at the job, but I'm still your mother. I was angry and upset and a bit irritated that Belikov was able to find you when your father and I couldn't."

Hearing Abe's involvement at that early star was interesting, but she'd brought up something else which needed discussing. Some of my new-found forgiveness was tempered with a fresh dose of anger.

"Alright, so you've given me your sob story and explained away your faults over the years. What do you have to say about yesterday? I was under the impression that you were here to apologise for that." I pulled my hand out from between hers.

"Just because I've seen the error of my ways doesn't mean that I always choose the correct path now. I'm scared, Rose. I just got you back and I'm losing you again, to a man who understands you and cares for you better than I ever did."

Go figure. The reason that my mom couldn't accept my upcoming marriage was because the guy I was marrying was too perfect. "Wait, you were being such a bitch because you were jealous?"Maybe I should have brought home an older, tattooed, scary-ass car thief. Oh, hold on. I had.

"Yes. Well, sort of. Rose, it's clear how much you love him. I'm worried that he's going to leave you- maybe not intentionally," she added on seeing my scowl, "and that there's not going to be a thing that anyone can do to fix it. As a highly skilled Guardian you're relatively safe, but if something happens to him then you'll be racing off across the world again with barely a regard for your own life."

"I'd do that for anyone I care about," I stated matter-of -factly. "It's what I do." She ignored me, on a roll now.

"I've heard so much about Olena Belikova and how brilliant she is, but how much does she know about me? I'm embarrassed by how I'll appear to her, and how she'll judge me for being a shoddy mother at times."

"Olena doesn't judge," I said, springing to my future mother-in-law's defence. "She's usually on the receiving end, though. And I've said plenty about what an amazing Guardian you are."

Mom rolled her eyes. "Doesn't judge- one more way she's better than me." I ignored her pettiness, wanting to move this conversation along to some kind of closure. It was beginning to drag, and I had better things to do than spend an afternoon battling with my mother. Thankfully, it seemed like she couldn't stop talking. "Anyway, I'd be hopeless at wedding planning. I couldn't tell the difference between silk and satin, or cream and ivory. I'd just get in the way."

"I can't tell the difference either," I scoffed. "That's what Lissa's for. I just wanted you to be there as support, someone to help make her back off when she said the word 'tulle' too many times. I still don't know what it is! I hoped that the wedding planning could be sort of mother-daughter bonding activity, or whatever the current Hallmark term for it is."

Guilt crept into her features. "I didn't realise you felt that way. You made it sound as though you actually wanted an opinion, which I honestly don't have about weddings. I've never even been to one. It's just how I've grown up- marriage is rare as it is; the white wedding thing is something I've never seen the attraction of. That's part of the reason your father and I parted ways."

If there were any more surprises like this to come, than I had a feeling that more alcohol might be necessary. "Wait, Abe wanted to get married?"

Mom laughed. "The first words he ever spoke to me were a proposal, though of course he wasn't serious at that point. He asked again, and I declined as I wasn't ready to tie myself down to one man for the rest of my life. The third time he asked was when I told him I was pregnant, but I was so overwhelmed by everything that I never gave him an answer. Then you were born and I almost said yes, but by then it was too late. Abe explained to me the extent of his 'business', and we decided it was best for him not to be a part of your life."

Wow. By this point she could have said that she'd split up with Abe because he thought I might be Sasquatch's lovechild. I decided just to roll with it for now and process everything later, preferably on a full stomach. "So to sum everything up, you've been bitter and selfish for most of my life and want to turn things around, but don't know how."

She gave me a look that said that my summary wasn't quite satisfactory, but didn't pursue the point. "Yes. Considering how alike we are- whether you can see that or not- I feared that you felt the same but were deluding yourself to believe that you wanted something you didn't."

"It wouldn't be the first time," I joked, echoing something I'd once said to Dimitri, "but no. Not about this."

We sat in silence for a minute, letting everything that she'd said sink in.

"I can see that, actually. The first time I ever really tried to see things from your side was when Dimitri pointed out how similar we are. I was so angry at him for that," I laughed, "I refused to believe that I could relate to you at all. But like always, he was right."

Her brow furrowed. "Dimitri's responsible you starting to treat me like a human being?"

"Yep," I said, popping the p. "If he hadn't come along with his Zen wisdom and practical advice crap, I might never have forgiven you for punching me in the face."

"Hmph. Here I was hoping that you'd grown up and made that decision on your own."

"Stubbornness was something I inherited from you," I said with a smirk. "It just needed an impartial third party to point it out."

She muttered something like 'impartial indeed', but her expression was softer now.

"So...any chance that you'll come dress shopping? You don't have to have an opinion, or say anything at all. You could even just come as Lissa's sub Guardian," I hedged.

"Rose," she said gently, laying her hand over mine again, "I didn't realise how important this was to you. I'll be there; not as a Guardian, but as your mother."

I searched her face for any sign that she was just humouring me to avoid another fallout, but that wasn't in her nature. She didn't sugar coat things or pander to what others wanted, and I admired that in her.

Switching to the sofa, I surprised mom with a hug. She returned the embrace after a few static moments of surprise.

"I won't just sit there like a mute, either. I'll give my opinion, for what it's worth. I might not be able to tell what fabric the dress is made of or make comments on the cut, but I'll tell you if it looks shit or not." The sound of my mom swearing in her thick Scottish accent made me want to giggle, which I stifled immediately. "By the same merit, I'll say if you look good."

"Aren't mothers supposed to think their daughters look good in everything?"

Mom snorted. "No, that's Dimitri's job. It's up to me to make sure you don't embarrass yourself and show me up."

Confessions of inadequacies and fears aside, she was still the same old Janine I knew and, yes, loved.

"I love you mom," I said as I broke the embrace, "but can you try to actually accept that I'm capable of making my own choices? And maybe a little less of a bitch in the future?"

For a moment I thought she was going to about at me for calling her a bitch, but she just nodded. "I'll try, but it seems to be an inescapable Hathaway trait."

"That sounds like an excuse," I said suspiciously.

"Another trait of ours."

With bad reality TV playing in the background, mom and I flicked through one of the many wedding magazines Lissa had purchased for me. Together we discarded the poofy ballgowns and chiffon explosions, argued over the need for lace, and finally decided on a total of two dresses that passed our rigorous scrutiny. Both were miles out of my price range as they were from high-end designers, but at least now I had an idea of what to look for when actually trying on real dresses. We also set a definitive budget that I was comfortable with, as I was still insisting on paying for the dress myself.

Now that my mom was on board, it felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Finally burying the hatchet that had been keeping us apart for so long felt good as well; though I'd forgiven her before, I'd never really had closure. Now I did, and was free to focus on the wedding. The excitement built as time passed, and I couldn't wait to go and buy my dress.

So, there you go. How was it? I wanted to give Janine reasons for past and present failures without removing the fact that she was just being a bit of a bitch as well. I'd love your opinion on how it came across :)

Review and Dimitri will daydream about you at work. Look at the latest Frostbite movie news and he will skip work to come and make that daydream a reality ;D