'Understand that all creatures seek immortality. The primary method is to mate and pass on a genetic lineage. But humans are thinking creatures. We have the opportunity for our names to echo out forever by virtue of our achievements. Centuries after their passing we speak of Newton and Mao, Archimedes and Hitler. Will we remember these heroes? No. But we will remember the Great Tyrants for their cataclysmic power and the legacy still felt to this day: Luciana Cisneros, the Stormwind; and Pedro Salvatore, the Titan.'
—Excerpt from 'The Effect of Heroics' by Saruhiko Ando.
Shouta Aizawa groans tiredly, wondering what being well-rested feels like. It seems another issue pops up every time he opens his eyes, and not all of them are related to the Sports Festival. Most are, but some are wholly new.
Like trying to figure out why someone from the military was talking to Nezu a few short hours ago or the tense standoff between Snipe and someone in the navy. He still doesn't have answers for either and unless it leads to something burning down in the next twenty-four hours, he frankly doesn't have the energy to care.
"Two days and we're no closer to figuring out who took them," he mutters.
Despite his frustration, he is relieved. Two of his students are back. They may be battered, bruised, and malnourished, but they are alive. Even if they both looked like feral animals moments from a confrontation. He'll have to monitor them more than any other student, a task he feels will find a way to be more difficult than he anticipates.
After all, Inko Midoriya and Endeavour aren't the easiest parents to deal with and for different reasons.
"Eventually we will," Nezu says.
The Principal is seated near the window in the teacher's lounge, recently converted into a collaborative working space. Nemuri is passed out on the couch, stacks of papers spilt messily around her. Any other day, Shouta would have been the slightest bit more difficult about letting her be lazy.
With all that's come out of the incident, they're on rotation. Higari and Sekijiro are both asleep, using the dorms UA has. Nemuri isn't supposed to be sleeping, but then again, he did lace her drink with a sleeping agent because of how inefficient she was becoming.
Let's see how you like someone forcing you to sleep, he thinks pettily, but can't help the tiny smile. It's something she's done to him since they were kids. This is the first time he's done the same back to her. It's nothing more than a very light sleeping agent.
"That's not good enough," Shouta says. "That symbol some sick bastard carved into their legs is turning up hits on—"
"Grey Boy," Nezu finishes. "I'm well aware."
On his desk are dozens of files of anything resembling tangentially associated with the symbol carved in the legs of two of his students.
"He died. Master Railroad killed all nine of them." Aizawa isn't the biggest history nerd but he is certain of that. That day is still a national holiday in America.
"They'll always be copycats. It's the nature of these things."
"How much older do they look to you? Three months? A year?" Aizawa takes removes a pack of liquorice and takes a bite to calm his nerves. "They weren't gone for just three days. Some bastard took advantage of this and stole my students. The things they described would get anyone in the military an honourable discharge."
"We'll find them, and when we find who took them, I assure you that we'll bring to bear every resource we have."
"Including the people in the military you were talking to," Shouta says snidely.
"Don't be a brat. There are procedures that need to be followed. When we aren't so busy, I'll walk you through them. For now, we have other matters to deal with."
"Do you know any villains with time quirks?"
"Time quirks are less prevalent now than they used to be," Nezu says. "The Yakuza hoarded them in the past. Rumour has it they may have another one. I'll need to investigate that as well. And perhaps see to improving the security around the Todoroki household."
"We wouldn't need to do that if he just let us take care of his son."
"There was no stopping Endeavour if he wanted his son back," Nezu says. "And having a public argument with the number two hero is never worth it."
"They need rest," Shouta says. "They have no right being back at school. We haven't even considered the psychological ramifications of what they went through. Did you see Midoriya? I didn't even know he could be angry. Let alone angry enough to break down a door and threaten me. And with his mother—"
"We'll go through official channels and recommend they both undergo therapy, but there's not much we can do for either of them. Not without great risk to the school."
That's not enough, he thinks. He's hurting and he's stuck with her, for fuck's sake.
He doesn't know how to solve the problem, not when his student is so insistent on seeing the truth. Not when there's someone working behind the scenes to stonewall him every time he tries to pull up information on Izuku or his mother. By the third time, every file on the two had just disappeared from every database in the country.
There's so much work that needs to be done that it's hard to justify enquiring further. The dead still need to be accounted for, the injured still need treatment, and he doesn't even know what will happen to the school in the coming weeks.
"I hate that they can bypass all the rules," he says bitterly. "They're there for a reason. They're there to protect our students."
Nezu scoffs, glancing at Nemuri. She snores lightly and won't be awake for a few more hours. Hopefully, around the time the next shift comes in.
"Rules only apply to the masses. Midoriya's being watched by the Imperial Family and I still don't know why they have such an interest in him."
Every mention of the Imperial family sends chills down his spine. It reminds him of his meeting with a member of the Royal Guard and the unsaid threat of death. It reminds him of Taiwan sinking and the Purge that followed. It reminds him of his mother dying in black flames.
Yes, he wants to scream at Fumikage every moment but he trusts his student. The boy is noble and honourable to a fault. Whatever the cause, Shouta knows he's simply working through things. And Shouta's more than willing to trust in him.
"His quirk?"
"No, it's likely gone on longer than that. His father has almost no public records and the surveillance around their home is extensive. I'll need to do a bit more digging. And when you're as powerful as Endeavour is then you can get away with more things than most people. He may not be as powerful as All Might, but he's a deterrent just the same. Hawks doesn't come close to Endeavour and Enji has a quality most people lack."
"And that is?"
"His growth rate. I paid him quite a bit of attention as an alumnus and the one thing he always showed was growth in combat. Every time he's fought against someone, he's come out stronger, sometimes exponentially. If he keeps on getting stronger with every stronger opponent he faces, there's a chance he might one day match All Might. The government is well aware of that, the military as well. Keeping someone with that kind of potential as an ally is just common sense."
"Hawks is just as strong at half that age."
"And Hawks is smart enough to know he'd lose a fight against Endeavour, unlike you," Nezu rebukes. "A lot of people see Enji's abrasive personality and assume he got to where he is by being a bully but he got there by being better than everyone else. His growth may have slowed down after having kids, but no one's come close to taking his spot. Do you want to know something interesting?"
"You're going to tell me anyway."
Nezu blinks, taken aback.
"Well then," he says, recovering, "I have places to be if you have no interest in my lessons."
The rodent jumps off his chair and heads towards the door.
"Nezu, I need you to do me a favour."
The rodent pauses but doesn't turn back. "Your former student turned traitor, I take it?"
That he knows before Shouta says it doesn't surprise him anymore. "Yeah."
"You realise he is a criminal? One who took part in—"
"I know," Shouta snaps. "And he was my responsibility. I was supposed to be his teacher."
"You were but you aren't his father. There's a line where your responsibility ends and what happened to him was unfortunate, but it wasn't a fault of the school. Students are expelled and live their lives without resorting to crime."
"I don't care. Do this for me. I've had too many losses this year. I need to do something right."
Nezu chuckles. "I've already arranged for us to take custody of him."
That admission startles him. "What?"
"It's why you saw me talking to people in the military. Despite what you've seen in the last few weeks, I don't do what I do out of cruelty. If enough heroes who come out of UA have an interest in changing things for the better, then I'll have succeeded. Look at All Might, Endeavour, and all the other UA alumni. They're making things better. The students who graduate from General Studies and Business help out as well. You might not think it, but a moderately competent administrator in public works makes sure people get supplies in Hokkaido and Shikoku. It might be slow and maybe it'll take a long time, but we'll get there."
"And that includes Nagisa."
"Yes. Rehabilitation is one of my goals as well. Not everyone will leave that facility but some do. And if the rest don't hurt anyone, then I figure it's a net positive."
"Then why do the things you do with the methods you use?"
"Because kindness is the luxury of the strong but cruelty comes easily to the weak and powerless. This world will beat you down at every turn and seeking kindness from others is foolish. You humans will always look out for yourselves and when you don't, it ends badly."
"People aren't monsters."
"No, but those with power are rarely kind. Of all the scientists who experimented on me, only one was kind to me. He died making sure I walked away free." Nezu shrugs. "I am not powerful, Shouta. I must be cunning and cruel before I can be kind. But where I can, I help everyone. Remember that. Do more good on balance than bad."
-TDB-
Shouto Todoroki sits in contemplation. There is a spot in the massive home his father owns that is hidden away from all view, a single concrete circle and fireproof walls designed purely for training with fire. All his siblings have spent time in it before to identify their capacity for fire.
The godflame bathes one half of his body whilst ice coats the other half.
It isn't really a fire even though it looks like it. It doesn't give off heat unless he commands it to. No, its power is more fundamental than simply raising the temperature. Though he is glad that his right side runs hot due to the core of godflame in his soul. It means he can still use his ice without worrying about hypothermia.
He generates a block of ice and lets the godflame surround it.
He sees, using the sight granted to him by the black eye. The godflame isn't dangerous unless he wills it, so the block doesn't melt. Heat is only a tiny part of the power, an inefficient portion at that. With his eye like this, and with his concentration focused on the ice, he sees what happens when he commands the flame to consume the block.
Infernal power slices through the bonds between water molecules, sundering the inter-molecular hydrogen bonds. The ice crumbles until he commands the flame to go further. The base molecule for water is made from two hydrogen atoms and one oxygen atom, linked as a hydroxide ion and a hydrogen ion. With his sight, he can see how the godflame cleaves the intramolecular covalent bonds until only separate atoms exist.
He takes it a step further. Grasps and controls those individual atoms by manipulating the quantum states of their electron and their associated probability until they exist where he wants them to. He wants to dig deeper and see what makes an atom what it is.
He heats the oxygen atom up until the electrons float freely—and he isn't foolish enough to let that energy escape freely, so he has the godflame consume it and shunt it back to the abyss. And when he has just the nucleus, made up of protons and neutrons, he experiments by taking protons at random from the atoms in the air and adding them to the nucleus until he has an atom of gold. He does this with more atoms, billions upon billions of them, moving purely on instinct until in his hand he holds a gold snowflake.
He blinks, eyes hurting from being open so long.
He rubs at his right eye. His hand comes away slick with blood. Shouto sighs and merely cleans his eye. Bleeding from the eyes is nothing compared to what he has seen.
He stands unsteadily, legs shaking. It takes him a moment to notice just how bright it is. He checks his watch and sees it is noon, not the early hours of the morning he started at.
Then he notices Endeavour, still as a statue and observing him with a blank expression. The man is still taller than Shouto, though the gap isn't as large as it once was. Maybe in a few months, he'll be as tall as his father.
"You could have destroyed this city if you went any further. I warned you to fear the flame, boy."
Shouto lifts the snowflake reverently. It is perfect on a molecular level, glossy and reflective.
"I made something," he says softly.
His father stares at it for a long moment. "You did. And in the process, you transmuted matter and altered the natural order of the world."
"That's what quirks do."
"Quirks tainted by the abyss, yes. Normal quirks aren't the flames of hell." His father adjusts the top button of his blue shirt. "I can't forever be there to watch your every step. If you forget, you could destroy the world without thought."
"I won't."
"But you can. No one should suffer the burden of that much power."
Shouto shrugs. He knows he should be afraid or angry with the man. But those emotions are gone, burnt away along with much of who he was.
"Get your things, boy. We're going to see your mother."
The command surprised him. It explains why Endeavour isn't in his costume on what would usually be a work day. Even at home, the man tends to stay in costume or wear training clothes. Seeing him in jeans and a button-down shirt is perhaps one of the odder things he's seen today, and that includes the insides of an atom.
The drive is quiet. Shouto doesn't pay much heed to it. The world looks so different now. There's light as he's never seen it before: gamma radiation and ultraviolet and x-rays share space with the currents of energy that permeate a city. He tracks electrical currents underground as they converge to the tallest building in the city, a blazing mass of crackling blue, and to its tip where the tower emits rays of electromagnetic radiation all across the city.
It is a mess of colours and energy, the flow and exchange of that which gives existence its forward momentum. There are humans with electrical networks he finds beautiful, their souls like perfect crystals of orderly energy structures. He sees the energy of the sun, hears the words it weaves and knows it greets him in specific. It sends words of the other stars waiting at his command, hoping one day to speak to him.
It is beautiful to see and hear and experience, a kaleidoscope of something incomprehensible and glorious.
He wipes away the single tear that escapes his iron-tight control. A glance reveals Endeavour observing him.
Contemplating.
Judging.
"I don't care what you think," Shouto snarls. "I don't care if you think I'm weak. You don't see what I see."
"Everything I did was to keep mankind safe," Endeavour says slowly.
Shouto leans away. "You protected no one. You broke our family."
"If you hated me, hated my fire, you would never reach for the godflame," he continues. "And even if you did, you'd know its power because I taught you to fear the flame. You did everything I taught you. I'm disappointed because every sacrifice I made means nothing."
He looks at the man and finds nothing but earnestness. And that stokes his anger. It takes all his concentration not to set the car and street and city on fire.
"It was your choice to put her in a mental asylum," he says through clenched teeth once his anger has abated slightly.
"Yes. Because I couldn't risk her seeing that place anymore from our fires—well, yours in truth. I knew to control my hellfire."
"Being afraid of something isn't control."
"Fuyumi and Natsuo visit her all the time. So does the other one."
"Toya," he corrects harshly. "That's his name, you bastard."
"I could care less. I never said I was a good man. I just did what I could with the resources I had."
"You didn't have to treat them like shit."
"Really? Would you not have resented them if I treated them kindly. If I treated them like that, you would never have helped and shielded them from me—and yes, I always knew. All of you are united in your singular defiance of me. And I would rather have that than see you falter. What choice would you have made if you hated them as well, if you had no good memories?"
Shouto looks away, remembering that moment where he held the power to choose the future. There were possibilities that ended in fire and ash and an endless realm of torment he would preside over.
"I would have burnt it all down."
"Yes. But it doesn't matter anymore. You burnt away the ties that bind me to you. You may be my son, but you aren't the image I made of you. Not anymore."
"And where does that leave us."
"That choice is up to you."
Endeavour opens his door and steps out. Shouto does the same and glares at him in the parking lot of the hospital.
"I failed you," Endeavour says after what feels like an hour but can be no more than a minute. "I'm disappointed in the choice you made but I can respect it. I can understand why. You're your own person now."
"Apologising doesn't make you a better person." And it is the closest Endeavour will ever come to an apology. He knows his father, knows his cruelty and his rage.
The man scoffs, leading him towards the hospital. "I could care less. The only repentance I need is knowing you'll live a long life. That this world won't burn down in your anger. That same anger you felt in the car."
Shouto looks away. "You don't get to walk away from all punishment."
The man shrugs and gestures to a door. It has their family name on it.
"This is your story now. You get to decide what's important to you. You get to choose who should be important to you. You've outgrown me and my lessons."
Shouto places his hand on the door. "Your lessons were wrong."
"Fear the flame for it will burn you," his father says. "Fear yourself for you can burn the world. Tell me where the lie is and I'll admit everything I taught you was wrong."
He can't argue against that. It is always there awaiting his command. The power to burn the world down is a constant companion.
"Despite everything," Endeavour says, walking away, "I am proud of you."
Even in casual clothes, the man is imposing. There is too much bad blood between them. Whilst the emotional context for many of Shouto's memories are gone, he remembers the physical pain. Remembers the feeling of Fuyumi holding him tight at night as he cried. Remembers the hate on Toya's face as he walked out, never to be seen in their home again. And then Natsuo months later. But without the emotions, it's like watching a movie about someone else.
Those five words are the kindest Endeavour has ever said.
Without the deep-seated rage and blood-curdling hate, he can… appreciate the intent of the words. They aren't said snidely. They aren't his father's way of asking for forgiveness. They are merely a statement of fact.
He may never forgive Endeavour, but that doesn't mean he can't move on.
The door opens easily.
The room is nothing special: a small room with a bed, a cabinet and a TV. There's a woman sitting in a chair by the window. She looks like Fuyumi, has the same grey eyes and pale hair. Or, he supposes upon seeing the age lines, Fuyumi looks like her. It can only be his mother.
He doesn't feel a shred of emotion.
She looks up, her eyes taking him in fully. Her face runs a gamut of emotions with more range than Endeavour has ever shown him. There is love there, warm and bright—and the godflame shifts in response within him, reacting to the woman he gambled away for one-third of the universe.
Shock that he is here.
Hope that this isn't an illusion.
Joy that he is real.
"Shouto," she says. There is so much sheer relief in her voice that it leaves him stunned, makes the godflame burn hotter and brighter.
How can someone love him so much? Love him as easily as people breathe when he can't so much as muster anything more than mild interest in response.
He approaches her slowly. "Mother."
"What's wrong?" she asks once he's close. "What happened to your eye?"
"A lot."
He kneels before her.
"What happened to you? What happened to my child?" She brushes her thumb near his right eye, the one that's changed from the godflame. "Who did this to you?"
"I did this to me," he says strongly. "Let me tell you my story."
And so, he does, speaking slowly about his time in the dark place. He tells her of the Sports Festival and his titanic clash with Midoriya. He tells her of the explosion and finding himself in a world of nightmares and madness.
He doesn't tell her about the world of blood and fire. He can't. There are some things he is not ready for. He refuses to speak of choking her to death slowly, of how he could repeat the act without a shred of remorse. He doesn't want her to know he killed someone who looks and sounds like her only daughter.
"I did a lot of bad things to survive. I took lives to survive. I gave up your memory for power. And I let innocent bystanders burn to ash because I was careless."
It may only be him that cares about the trees but he remembers the psychic scream of their death. There is so much knowledge hiding in his soul. He tells her but the tiniest portions of it: their life as creatures of shadow; their rebirth as trees vast as this city; how they age, becoming paler and smaller with each passing millennium.
She grips his hands tightly. Her fingers are colder than his. He's had to regulate ever involuntary use of her quirk, shifting energy states so the room doesn't freeze over in her shock.
"Midoriya. Tell me about him."
Shouto can't help the tiny smile, a twitch at the corner of his lips.
"He's an idiot," Shouto admits. "He cares too much about everyone but himself. He's willing to give everything for his friends. And he never asks for anything in return. He's a broken mess but he keeps on walking. He leads by example and never asks you to bear the same burden, and he'd forgive you if you failed so long as you try. He's my greatest enemy."
"He's also my closest friend," Shouto admits after a silence. "He taught me the law of the jungle and how to be the most dangerous thing there. He was a cruel puppet for a greater force and it made me hate him. We fought all the time. Even now I just want to punch him in his smug face. He'd probably break my nose."
That makes him smile, unbidden. At some point, violence became a core part of their relationship.
He speaks of returning home, of the interrogations and the lie Izuku weaved easily. He tells her of the conversation with his father, of how his actions drove her mad.
"No, I did that," the woman who loves him, adores him as only a mother can, says. "There's no excuse for what I did. And I'm so sorry."
Shouto shrugs. "I don't even remember it. But I know I'd forgive you even if I did. Maybe not now, but one day."
"You can make new memories. I'm here. I always will be. And I'll always love you."
Shouto takes her hand. Places the gold snowflake in her palm. Closes her hand around it.
It is the first thing he has ever created with his powers. It is not the burning hellscape Endeavour expects from his flame. It isn't the inexorable weight of ice he was very literally bred for. Made from his fire, it represents his ice.
It is an act of creation from a force that can set the world alight.
"I may not remember you and I might not love who you were. But I don't hate father as well. I'm not chained to my past any longer. That suffering doesn't determine my future any longer."
She smiles. His heart is not warmed by it, but perhaps, in time, it will be. Perhaps he'll associate this woman with mother and that with love and kindness and compassion.
"You're stronger than your parents."
-TDB-
It is early afternoon and Izuku shares a meal with his mother. He picks at the pork cutlets, playing with them more than eating. His leg keeps on twitching beneath the table, hidden from his mother's sight.
"What's wrong?" she asks. "You've lost a lot of weight. You need to eat."
"I'm not really hungry. It's been too long since I ate normal food. I'm not used to it."
In truth, a day before he came, he ate quite a bit of tuna on the train. That was one of the few normal meals he ate. In the months he spent in the darkness, his body has become used to a diet of godling flesh and metallic hearts and crystal livers.
This pork is meaningless. Izuku didn't kill it. He didn't conquer pig and slaughter it on an altar of his dark power. And even if he were to do so, there is no strength to be had in its heart.
She frowns. "That's not it. You didn't even try to eat."
"You always know when I'm lying."
"You're my son."
He sighs and says, as a compromise, "It's too normal. Everything about this is too normal. I'm having lunch with my mother. A day ago, I was fighting for my life. I'm checking doors and corners for threats. My quirk's always ready. I just don't trust everything is this peaceful."
"Is that why you punched Endeavour? You just saw him and snapped?"
The memory of that punch brings a smile to his face. "No. I promised Shouto I'd do it next time I saw Endeavour."
"And your father. I know you're angry with him but he's nearly sixty."
"I know. And that was wrong of me. I just… my body reacted automatically." He sets his fork down, giving up on eating. "Nezu says I'm operating a combat response."
"You don't feel safe in your own home."
He blinks. "Huh, I don't. That's not fair."
"Hey, you don't have to be perfectly fine all at once. I'm here. Just take it one day at a time."
"Okay."
"Are you ever gonna tell your teachers the truth?"
Izuku considers that for a moment, not surprised that she knows he lied through his teeth during the interviews with the police.
"No. They don't need to know and they can't help anyway."
He spends the afternoon antsy and restless, pacing like a caged animal and more than ready for a fight. His father passes through once to leave Izuku a new phone—one that looks a lot nicer than his ruined one. Izuku isn't ready to have another conversation with the man just yet. There's still a lot of information he has to digest, emotions that he has to figure out and untangle.
A loud thud startles him off the couch. One For All fills his body. The insistent banging is coming from the door. He slinks towards it, crouched low to the ground. He presses his back to the door and opens it slowly, using the door itself to hide him.
The moment he sees the arm—tanned, with callouses from training—he springs to action, pirouetting around the door, his leg already lashing out. The assailant ducks beneath his kick, scrambling back before he can follow through.
"Fuck, Izuku, calm down."
He pauses and looks at the person. Ojiro with his hands raised in a placating gesture. A friend, not an enemy.
Izuku rises from his crouch slowly, forcing his limbs to loosen. He watches Ojiro bring his hands down from the defensive position.
He looks past Ojiro to the others behind him: Shinsou who clearly hasn't slept in a week and has a multitude of scars on his neck; Ochaco who looks nervous; Tokoyami who seems indifferent if not for the way Dark Shadow is already manifested; Kirishima being held back by both Ashido and Asui.
He swallows and lets One For All fade, the glow suffusing his skin vanishing. "Hey."
"Have you calmed down?" Ojiro asks, his posture too slack for it to be anything other than an attempt to placate Izuku and not trigger another reaction.
"Not really," he admits. "Just don't startle me. Or try and sneak up on me. Or making any really loud noises. Otherwise, you're getting punched."
"That's a really specific list," Shinsou says, striding forward. "Besides, you wouldn't punch me."
"You'd be the third person today," he mutters. "And why are you here?"
"Because you're our friend who got kidnapped," Asui says dryly.
Izuku nods tiredly, mostly at the lie he must maintain. "Right. Kidnapping. Not that big of a deal."
"Also, we're invading your house," Shinsou says and then enters like he owns the place.
Izuku steps aside to let the rest of them stream in. "Clearly you are."
"Don't get upset," Kirishima says, and hooks an arm around Izuku's neck. "Just go with the flow."
"I suggest you do so," Tokoyami says. "These cretins co-opted me without permission."
"Please. You were here first."
"Slander."
And then they situate themselves in his home, choosing seats and arguing over what they're going to watch. He stares incredulously as Kirishima ransacks the fridge for a meal and argues with Ashido over what makes a better sandwich between beef and chicken. Shinsou even has the audacity to look Izuku in the eye and tell him that he's taking one of Izuku's limited edition All Might hoodie because he forgot his jacket at home.
Tokoyami is the only one with any decency. He stands beside Izuku, arms crossed in annoyance.
"What is going on?" Izuku asks.
"Your mother contacted Shinsou." Izuku looks up in annoyance. "And he contacted the rest of us. Asui suggested we all visit. Here we are regardless of your personal feelings on the matter."
"Aren't your parents worried or something?"
"It seems Ochaco was insistent," Tokoyami explains. "And the mention of your mother placated most of the parents. To my knowledge, they hold much admiration for her."
"I mean sure, but why are you guys here?"
"Only Midoriya is so manly that he thinks a kidnapping attempt is normal," Kirishima says from his spot in the reclining chair. "Clearly this is another one of those normal things Izuku doesn't get."
"Explains so much," Ashidosays. "Um, Ochaco, you wanna explain?"
She sighs. "Remember how we came to visit you after USJ? Same concept, different execution."
Izuku nods. He still doesn't get the concept but he's given up on arguing with these people a long time ago. "Great. You saw me. See you at school?"
"No one's going to school for the remainder of the week," Tokoyami says. "A lot of students were hospitalised. And even then, no one wants to send students back after a terrorist attack."
"Yeah, none of that explains why you're all still here."
"Do you want us to go?"
"Um, maybe—"
"Then stop fighting and get comfy," Shinsou says. "We're basically having a giant sleepover."
Izuku opens his mouth. Decides against wasting the oxygen. Closes his mouth. He shrugs and walks over to where Shinsou sits and removes him from the spot with a kick.
"Hey," Shinsou yelps, sprawled out on the floor.
"This is my seat."
"That was brutal."
"You guys just invaded my home. You're eating my food. Making fun of me. No one is explaining why. The least you can do is let me sit in my favourite spot."
He's breathing hard by the end. From the heat, he feels his face might be flushed. Oh, and he might have also been shouting at the end.
It's Ojiro who breaks the silence. "We're just here because it means you're back here with us. We're not trying to be mean."
"Yeah. I'm worried that if I look away you'll be gone," Ashido adds.
"Being alone is fine," Tokoyami says, "but not if you are suffering alone."
He looks them one at a time. Ochaco who is missing her trademark vicious smile. Ojiro who looks worn and tired and about ready to give up. Asui who very carefully never crosses a shadow when she walks. Kirishima who has a false grin and looks ready to punch someone. Shinsou who unconsciously touches one of his many scars. And Fumikage whose politeness is a weak shield.
All of them are here, for him, despite their own personal problems.
"Oh."
They're nothing like Shouto who can have a conversation entirely through the way he moves his shoulders. They're loud and brash and have no concept of personal space. They don't have overtly tragic backstories or arcane powers—outside of Tokoyami and even that's not really him having the powers but the things attached to him.
Looking at them, it makes him understand a bit more why he's stressed so much. Shouto is a bastion of silence, a safe harbour during a storm. But the silence is sometimes the calm before the raging tempest. Shouto is violence and danger and a threat all at once, more enemy than friend sometimes.
He can trust that if he punches Shouto, then Shouto will punch back with everything he's got. He can't do the same with Ochaco without fear of breaking her. He highly doubts Kirishima will pounce and stab him.
And it's hard adjusting to people who smile easily and make jokes or even poke fun at each other. They're pleasantly warm where Shouto is frigid. Even their passions don't compare to Shouto's inferno of convoluted emotions.
There's something missing and Izuku suspects it to be fear. He's not afraid that they will stab him the moment he turns around. In truth, he's not experiencing a combat response. He's just forgotten how to deal with people who are normal. And compared to Shouto, even Tokoyami seems perfectly normal.
"Is that a good 'oh' or a bad one."
"Maybe."
"That's not an answer."
"I guess not."
He lets them simply figure things out between themselves. He doesn't take part in their games or jokes, and he may be tense, but he's not worried. And maybe that's more than enough.
He finds a deck of cards from somewhere and hands them out. Poker is a simple enough game, one that they all know at this point. He hands out the cards and they play. There's nothing they bet on, but somehow it becomes increasingly competitive amongst them.
"Oh, so you're acknowledging your position?"
"Say that again. I dare you," Ochaco says, glaring at Tokoyami.
Izuku looks to Ojiro as the two argue once again. His blonde friend looks indifferent. Kirishima is playing on his phone. Asui and Ashido are deep in a conversation. Only Shinsou watches the argument. Only he seems to care.
And if that's the case, Izuku doesn't have the energy to bother with it.
It's an hour or so after everyone has fallen asleep that he opens his eyes. He checks once more that Tokoyami and Ojiro are slumbering heavily in their sleeping bags before tip-toeing over to the library shelf. It's pitch dark but that hasn't been an issue for a long time. The book his mother gave him, the one his father owned, is on a shelf near the middle. He takes Hawkmoon's memoir and walks back to the couch.
He reads through it for an hour before he hears someone get out of their sleeping back. It might be Shinsou's insomnia acting up again—and he knows how pervasive that can be by every midnight text his friend sends. It won't be any of the girls since they're taking up his bedroom right now.
It turns out to be Kirishima.
The redhead settles down beside Izuku in the dark. "Hey. Can't sleep?"
"It's too… I don't know. Not quiet, but I don't feel safe-no, more like I feel like something's going to jump out at me."
Kirishima bumps his shoulder with his own. "Hey, I get that. No shame in it. Everyone handles things differently."
"That's something out of a bad self-help book." He sighs and prepares his lie. "It wasn't just three days."
"I figured."
"The guy who kidnapped us could… I suppose you could say he controlled time in a limited space. It was more six months than three days."
"I haven't slept since USJ," Kirishima admits quietly. "Ever since, well, you know."
"Nightmares?"
Kirishima smiles in the dark, his teeth sharp and glistening. "No. I literally don't sleep anymore."
"Huh." Izuku shrugs. That's the single least harmful side-effect of his quirk he's encountered so far. "Is that why your grades started improving?"
That startles a quiet laugh out of Kirishima. "Yeah. Got nothing better to do."
"I'm sorry. I know how important sleep is."
"You're my friend. Knowing what I know now, I think I would still try to save you that day. It might leave me messed up, but I know you'd die for me. For all of us. I think that's the least I can do for you."
Izuku closes his eyes. Takes a deep and shaky breath. Says, "I don't know what I did to deserve any of you."
"I think it's because you try harder than anyone I know. You're like the manliest person I know. Every time the world punches you in the face you just get back up. Don't matter that you got scars. Just proof you ain't going to stay down."
"Thank—"
"And proof that you two can't whisper," Shinsou mutters from behind them. "Can you please have your deep and meaningful conversation without waking me up?"
"Oh, so I was not the only one awoken by their very loud whispers," Tokoyami says, sitting up from his sleeping bag.
"This was getting really awkward," Ojiro says next. "I've been up since you kicked me trying to get your book."
He is glad they can't see how red his face is. "Sorry."
"It's fine. I've learnt to put up with your clumsiness. If you can't sleep then I'll stay awake until morning with you."
"Speak for yourself," Shinsou mutters. "I'm going straight back to sleep after this nonsense."
"But you don't go back to sleep once you're up," Izuku says, confused.
"He's merely being difficult," Tokoyami says. "You may as well switch on the TV if sleeping is no longer a possibility."
Somehow, he finds himself watching TV well into the morning, surrounded by people he trusts more than the world. He makes space for Ocahco when she and Asui and Ashido join them because apparently, he's loud enough to wake up an entire household.
"Let's go to the beach," he declares.
-TDB-
The sun is out in force. It feels odd on his skin but perhaps not odd in a bad way. Warm, gentle, and caring. All things he's become disused to in the last few months.
Izuku stares at the sun, wondering how much of its life remains. Billions of years, yes, but after all that he's seen, that doesn't seem very long. A blink of an eye in all honesty.
"You've got a lot of scars."
He glances at Ashido, currently doing her best to cocoon his legs in the sand with Ochaco. He isn't sure why they want to do that, maybe to keep him in place.
I don't like sand, Mikumo says. It's all coarse and rough, and irritating. And it gets everywhere.
Izuku rolls his eyes. It isn't like his brother is the one who has to deal with the sand.
"I don't have that many," Izuku says, almost tempted to cover up. He's wearing a pair of shorts and his favourite blue shirt, unbuttoned at the moment.
"You have more scars than all of us put together," Ocahco says. She taps his side. "How'd you get this one?"
He hums. "I think that was fighting Shouto. Pretty sure it was from that."
Ashido pokes the outside of his right thigh where his bunched-up shorts reveal a jagged burn scar. "That one?"
"Infection that Shouto burnt away."
Ochaco shudders. "He…"
"Only after I grabbed a knife and chopped out all the bad bits." Izuku smiles. "It didn't hurt as much as you think it did."
"Midoriya, you have an insane pain tolerance," Kirishima calls. "You saying it didn't hurt doesn't mean much."
Izuku sits up and sees his friend carrying Shinsou over his shoulder. For some reason, he's tied to a stake. Izuku watched incredulously as Kirishima stakes Shinsou a foot or two into the water despite his protests.
"I guess. Well anyway, I think those are all the interesting scars. The rest are from training incidents."
"Even the one on your arm?"
Izuku rolls his eyes. "You know the answer to that question. It happened a long time ago. I'm a lot better now."
"You don't just get better from things."
"No, it's a long road with a lot of missteps. Just ask my therapist."
And though Ochaco has that expression that says she wants to ask more questions, she has enough tact not to. Which makes it easy to relax more and more. These are his friends, perhaps not all of them—Shouto's absence is always right there in the back of his mind—but enough that he can make do.
That calm is the only reason he doesn't elbow Ojiro when he sneaks up on Izuku and throws him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. He only sighs when Ojiro throws him into the ocean.
The salt in the water reminds him of blood, an odd thought certainly, but the first that crosses his mind. He surfaces after a few minutes in the blue, staring at the sun through the water. It takes him a while to remember that humans can't stay underwater indefinitely.
The added water weight makes walking awkward, mostly because his new spine weighs half as much as he does. He wants to get used to that imbalance without using One For All. There may come a day he needs all of his power, even the few sparks he has to give his back additional strength.
He stumbles onto the sand, sitting.
Fumikage takes a seat next to him, dressed similarly to Izuku. His friend says nothing, just watches the water with Izuku.
"You always come to this beach."
Izuku hums in consideration.
"I guess I do. This is where it began, where I first learnt about my powers." He grins and it is a cruel thing. "I even remember the spot. Right there. Funny the things we remember."
"Yes." Fumikage glances over his shoulder, making sure everyone is too busy burying Shinsou to listen in on them. "This is where I accepted Eao's offer."
"That was stupid," Izuku says. "Almost as stupid as me accepting its last wish. Things worked out in the end. If I never accepted that wish, you'd never get that dragon and I would be dead a few times over. I wouldn't be able to walk without that wish."
"Do you believe it benevolent?"
"Oh, it has a plan. But I don't think that plan will hurt us." He runs his fingers through the sand. "There's one last piece to that wish. One day my disciple will take its wings. I guess we'll just have to wait to see."
"There's a lot we don't know."
"We have time to figure it out." He smiles. "We'll talk to Shouto when school starts up. Figure things out from there."
His friend makes a sound of amusement. "Shouto? How long were you in there to call him by his first name?"
"A few months. Thanks for sending your dragon."
"It was the only aid I could offer."
"It saved us a few times so I think it counted for a lot. You're not angry about me lying to them?"
"I understand why you've done it," Fumikage admits. "I may not like it, but I'm not saying the lie. It is not much of a distinction, I am aware, but it is one I can live with for your sake. By the end of this, we'll have to come clean and not just to our friends."
"You mean our teachers and our families."
"More," Fumikage says tiredly. "There were black flames at Shikoku. We are not alone in touching the abyss. Perhaps we'll have to have our lies accounted before the world."
"I fucking hope not."
"Hey, you two," Ashido calls. "Stop hiding and come over here."
Izuku offers Fumikage a smile and helps him up. Together, they walk back.
Seeing them all together sparks an idea. They're all so startlingly human. On a fundamental level, he knows they'll die. He remembers what the dragon told him, that only another monarch could stand the test of time with him.
And maybe that is true but being with the people here is the most important thing in the world right now. If love is the most powerful thing in the universe, if love is powerful enough to change the eternally unchanging and distort the fabric of the abyss, then aren't the people he loves just as important?
"Let's make a hero agency together," Izuku says suddenly.
They all look to him in silence for a beat, processing his suggestion. It comes from nowhere and comes without the slightest foreshadowing.
"All of us," he adds after a moment.
"Where's this coming from?" Ojiro asks.
"Yeah, this is random," Ochaco says.
Kirishima scratches this back of his head. "I like you a lot and all, but I kinda don't want to be a sidekick."
"And I don't want any of you to be my sidekick," Izuku says.
"You'll have to explain that to us."
"Exactly that. Us. All of us." He gestures to encompass them. "We make one agency, no main hero or anything like that."
"That's not a hero agency. That's… I don't have the words for it. A League of Villains but for heroes?"
Izuku doesn't particularly like that phrasing. "Or maybe like the New Age heroes. Hawkmoon and Graviton Lance and Master Railroad were all equals, all peers. And they were all friends."
"That'll be something different," Ashido says. "And weird."
"And perhaps something beautiful." He can't help but smile, nervous energy possessing him. "Just picture it. All of us, standing together and fighting villains."
"You seem pretty insistent on this," Ojiro says.
Izuku nods, remembering the words they shared before the Sports Festival. It seems so long ago, months for him but maybe only days for Ojiro.
"That way you can make sure I'm not doing something stupid. I'll be right next to you." He spins on the spot and nearly smacks Fumikage in the face.
"Cretin," Fumikage snaps, backing away.
"Just imagine it. Just for one moment, imagine how awesome it would be."
"I guess it sounds like an interesting idea," Shinsou says. "Maybe a bit naïve but that's all your ideas."
"I know it's naïve and maybe it's impossible, but why should it be? Why can't we do it? Give me a single reason we can?"
"The ranking system."
Izuku waves that away. "Then we get ranked as a group. We choose the fights we want to fight. We choose how to fight and why we're fighting. I'm coming to learn more and more that I can't make the world I want just by smiling. There must be strength as well and I'm stronger when I'm with you guys. Have I ever told you about the girl in the sunflower dress?"
"Oh," Shinsou says, looking away. "She's gonna haunt you forever."
"Maybe there's a reason she haunts me."
"What girl?"
He tells them about that little girl in the sunflower dress. The details get hazier with each retelling. Maybe one day all he'll remember is the dress she wore. Perhaps he'll forget all about her. As it is, he can still retell his cowardice with perfect clarity. He can still describe the sound of her wails with haunting accuracy.
"Maybe if I had someone else with me, I wouldn't have been so afraid," Izuku says. "Maybe it wouldn't have amounted to much."
"Is your life just a montage of tragic events?" Ashido asks, eyes wide.
"Maybe. But that's why I want us to do this together. I know what it's like being weak and alone. And friends make it easier.
"I love all of you but I don't think you understand what it means when I say that." He takes a deep breath to calm his racing heart. "I love you, Shinsou. You're my first friend and you've put up with me. I love you Fumikage for teaching me your ways. I love you, Ochaco, for being kind and vicious and just being you. I love all of you and when I say I love someone, it means I'll do anything for them. I want to always be with you guys."
"What happens if we argue?" Ochaco asks.
"Then we talk and shout and cry and make it work. Just like we've done already."
"Alright, say it straight," Ojiro says. "Tell us, in your words, why you think this is important. Break it down for us from the bottom up."
That is simple compared to everything else. It makes him love Ojiro all the more for understanding what he can't put in words.
"I love life," Izuku says strongly, reaffirming the declaration he made in the void. "I love the concept of it. Life is fragile and delicate. It might not be special or unique, but I think it's important. And saving people is the only way I know how to preserve life. Maybe it won't work out, but isn't trying better than giving up?"
"You're such a sap."
"I know and I don't care. I want to save everyone and I know that's impossible, but I can try. And doing something impossible is a lot easier with people you trust."
"Do you really trust us?" Kirishima asks, gaze shrewd.
"I trust you with my life," Izuku says honestly. "I trust you with my hopes and dreams and my ideals. I've trusted you with a lot of secrets. Maybe not all of them yet, but a lot. Would you have come here if you didn't trust me?"
"No."
Izuku grins the brightest grin he has. It is light as a feather and freeing of all burdens. It is a grin that holds every ounce of affection he has for his friends, a grin that can make people forget the scars he has. It is the same grin he learnt from All Might, a grin of someone with a deep abiding love for life.
"I want to be a hero. More than anything, I want to be a hero with you guys."
A/N:
Happy New Year's everyone. [Insert inspirational message of your choosing].
Well, that was something relaxing after all the suffering people went through for a big part of this story. Next chapter will come with another in-universe document like the one I did for Kurogiri. There will be a few more, though I think this season only has 3 in total.
That's it from me. Let me know what you guys think if you've made it this far by dropping a review. But if you can't, just know that your readership is more than enough for me.