10

It's been a long slow journey. I broke my fingers in July and spent the summer in a cast. After four months of occupational therapy - six hours a week - I am just starting to type again. This is my first attempt back at my favorite hobby. I am so sorry for the long wait and hope there is still some interest.

At St. Agnes' Skye learned very early that it did no good to cry for something, well for anything really. All it ever really got you was something to cry about and that was usually a long lecture about what you already had and should be thankful for…or a good swat…depending on just which nun was within ear shot.

But May was different and the little girl never felt the feeling she had right now. It was like something got pulled out of her, not like a big old splinter or a bad tooth, but like something deep in her…her… Skye wasn't sure where it was inside, maybe it was her soul, like the Sisters always talked about. Maybe her soul got yanked out. But that couldn't be right cuz then she'd have ta be dead, cuz your soul got pulled up to God when ya died and Skye knew she wasn't dead cuz it just felt too bad.

Yeye tried to help her feel better. He sat with her on the big couch and tried to tell her little things about May missing her own mom when she was little, buy Skye wasn't really listening. She was trying to figure out why she was crying and why she couldn't stop and she was pretty sure if she kept crying she was gonna throw up all over again. That was something she really didn't want to do, so she tried really hard to breathe like May taught her to do when she got really scared or nervous about something. She tried to think with May's voice, squeezing her eyes shut as hard as she could to keep the tears inside. She moved closer to Yeye and felt his arm pull her tighter.

It didn't work as good as it did with the real May, but she stopped a little. And after a bit she was kinda breathing right and she could hear Yeye talking to her in quiet words. He was telling her how much she was loved and how May wouldn't go if she didn't really have to and that he would be there every minute until she got back. Skye nodded against her grandfather's chest and hoped he knew she heard him. She couldn't talk just yet, but she wasn't sobbing anymore. They sat together for a long time until Skye was mostly just sniffling then Yeye said maybe she'd feel better if she washed her face with some cool water and they could have a nice cup of tea.

Skye almost smiled when she remembered that May said Yeye always thought a cup of tea would make anything feel better. But that made her think of May and the tears started rolling over her cheeks again. But Yeye held her hand all the way to her bathroom and pulled out the little steps so she could reach the sink and splash the cool water on her face. She closed her eyes so she couldn't see herself in the mirror cuz that would make her see how much she cried about missing May and that would make her cry all over again.

Yeye helped her down the little steps and sat on the closed toilet lid while he gently wiped her face with a soft towel. He gave a tiny smile as he finished with a light tap on her nose. "Perhaps we can put on only the tree lights and listen to the soft sound of carols…"

Skye was shaking her head before he finished. "Uh uh, I don't wanna turn on the lights or nuttin til May comes back. It ain't the same." A little tear rolled over her cheek as she finished. She didn't even wipe it away as she shook her head again. "I don't want no Christmas wit out May."

And she was crying all over again.

Yeye pulled her into his arms and carried her to her bedroom. He rubbed her back as he walked back and forth across it, just as he had done with his own little girl many years before. "Hush, hush, qīn'ài de háizi. Christmas will come no matter, but the lights will remain dim until our May returns. I promise this."

Skye laid her cheek against his shoulder and patted his back with one hand. It wasn't much, but enough for William to know she understood.

When the little girl's sobs once again became soft hics and eventually dissolved into sniffles, Yeye helped her to wash her face a second time then led her to the kitchen. They drank their tea mostly in silence. Skye was glad because if Yeye started to tell her any little Mellie stories she was sure she would cry more. It was awful to cry so much. A long time ago, in her short lifetime, one of the big kids told her it was dumb to cry about things ya don't got. He said it was easier to just have nuttin cuz then it don't bother ya if it's gone. A whole bunch of other big kids agreed with him and they all promised never to cry or complain about it. They didn't know little Skye was on the staircase listening. She promised too, even though she didn't really understand all of it. But now it made sense.

She looked up at the clock and squinted in an effort to decipher the time. One of the hands was kinda on the seven. She never could tell exactly, but last time she looked it was kinda on five and Skye could do that math. It was only two hours and there were a lot more hours in a whole week…maybe more than a whole week. She folded her arms against the table and rested her head atop them.

Yeye made a funny clicking noise and gently scolded. "It is not well to put your head where we will eat, sunnu."

"I ain't hungry, Yeye." Skye mumbled through her arms.

William let out a soft breath. "I know that you are feeling much bēishāng, but it is no reason to forget your manners.

Skye lifted her head and brushed the hair that had fallen into her eyes away from her face. She stared at her grandfather for a moment, considering the word he had just used. He used a lot of words she never heard before. With a sigh the little girl commented. "I feel like lots bee stings got my feelings, Yéyé." She shook her head slowly. "I don't like it very much."

William gave a small smile. "Bēishāng," he repeated. "It means you are feeling sad, but still you should keep your head from the table, sunnu."

Skye nodded and sat back in her chair. She stared at her almost full cup of tea and shrugged her shoulders. "I guess I ain't much thirsty either."

"Hmmm," William replied and nudged the cup closed to the child. "Yet you will drink the full cup as you know you should. I believe this was a promise."

Skye looked up at her grandfather for a few moments the blinked and gave a defeated sigh as he bumped the cup a little closed. He nodded as she wrapped both hands around it then took a small sip without lifting it from the table.

"It's still a little hot." She mumbled as she sat back on her chair. "Maybe it will make my hot wind hotter."

William chuckled under his breath. "That is not a worry." He assured as he motioned for her to take more of the strong sweet brew.

While Skye sat swinging her feet slowly and nursing her tea even slower, William warmed the soup they had had for lunch adding a bit more chicken and a bit of thickening, turning it to more of a stew. He set a small bowl in front of the little girl with a handful of crunchy fried rice noodles then sat down to his own dinner. Skye frowned at the steaming bowl.

"I ain't hungry, Yéyé. I dint make no promise ta eat and I drank almost this whole cup of tea." She tipped the cup toward him. "See?"

William blew across the spoon of stew in front of him and nodded slowly. "A few spoons will not be much, Skye." He replied without looking at the child then tasted his meal.

Skye plinked her spoon around inside her bowl and watched the vegetables and chicken swirl. She took a very small taste and set the spoon down gently on the table. William continued eating and did not prod the little girl to eat any more. He had been through this on many occasions when Melinda ached over the absence of her own mother. There were times his little girl merely picked at her food for days fretting over her mother's absence, especially near special occasions. There was no reason to force the child and it would get him nowhere and only increase the anxiety. He finished his meal and began clearing the table with nothing else said.

Skye stood and collected the silverware, carefully placing them in the dishwasher while William rinsed and did the same with the dishes. Closing the door on the machine he smiled at the rosy cheeked little girl with the puffy eyes and let out a sigh. Melinda surely would not be happy with the sight. He glanced at the clock.

"Perhaps it is time to bathe and ready yourself for bed." He suggested as he put out a hand.

Skye slipped her much smaller hand into his and headed for her room. She stopped at the door to the bath. "Maybe Mrs. Gibbons could help." She said just above a whisper.

William smiled at the little girl. "You do not think your grandfather can assist a small girl with this chore. I have had much experience, Skye."

Skye shrugged her shoulders and stared at her feet. "But she was your little girl from a little baby. I just got you for a gran…Yéyé on yesterday. Maybe I could do it myself if ya fix the water right fer me." Again she mumbled without meeting his gaze.

William thought for a moment, brushing off the idea that something could have caused this little one's nervousness at having a man help her with this simple parental chore. Melinda had not said the child had had such an experience. He would remember to ask and at the same time hoped to gain her trust in the next few days.

"I see." He nodded. "I understand this dilemma. Perhaps you can find the book of the dragon we did not finish while I call your kind neighbor." William spoke as he guided the child back toward the bed before exiting the room.

xx

May listened to the dull drone of the plane, ignoring the conversations of the other five agents strapped into the military style seats that lined its sides. They'd been in the air a little over three hours and were somewhere over the Atlantic. The pilot had told them the ETA was six a.m., Romanian time and advised everyone to get some sleep as there would be little time to do that once they hit the ground. Apparently it would be a race to some dilapidated castle to grab the dame object of interest before whoever the opposing forces got there.

The agent dropped her head back against the fuselage and let out a frustrated growl. What a damn ridiculous mission…dropped in the middle of nowhere to find a who-the-hell-knew-what before who-the-hell-knew-whom got there first. And to do it they dragged her away from her sick kid sixteen days before they had their first Christmas and DAMMIT! Why was she even letting this get to her?

Agent Melinda May let out an even more frustrated growl, clenching her fists so tightly she was certain she would put her nails through the palms of her hands. She felt it grow more intense when Coulson dropped into the empty seat next to her. The anger threatened to set her skin ablaze.

"DAMN!" She grunted with a stomp.

"I wasn't planning on saying a word." Phil raised both hands and backed away. "Just getting comfortable, hell you're the only one I know won't get all chatty and keep me up all night…day…whatever…"

"Skye's fever…" She responded, not speaking to him.

Coulson paused for a moment, almost confused by her comment. "I…ah...I thought your father had that hot breeze tea stuff for…"

"Shut up, Coulson." She barked as she ripped off her seat harness and bolted out of her seat. She took a few steps then turned back. "Sat phone, where?"

"May, you can't…" Coulson began as he struggled to pull himself free of his own harness and stand.

The woman was in his face before he succeeded, her finger less than a breath from his nose. "I don't give a flying rat's ass what protocol you're preaching. I need that damn phone." She snarled.

"It won't work til we're on the ground." He explained calmly. "We're dark until then."

For a moment May paused with her finger still pointing in his face. She let out a grunt. "Son of a b…" and dropped into her seat before finishing. "She's never going to let him…he won't know…she won't…" May spoke out loud to herself.

"Hey," Coulson tried to provide some support laying his hand on her arm. She pulled it away as if she'd been scalded. He paused, but understood. "Hey," he tried again. "Your dad's got this. He did okay with you." Phil offered a small smile. "And look at you now."

May stared at him for a moment, not sure if he was patronizing her or actually trying to help. She shook her head. "She's a special kid, Coulson and I promised I'd never leave her alone." She finished almost in a whisper.

Coulson scooted to the edge of his seat and turned toward her. "You didn't leave her alone. You left her with the person you trust most."

"You don't understand." She shot back, immediately regretting her tone. "She's never had a real Christmas and I was a fool to think I could give her one. Hell, I haven't celebrated since I left home. I didn't even own a damn ornament until two days ago. And she's sick, Coulson, you should know that better than anyone." She pointed at his clothing, changed since they'd boarded the transport but not before the others made more than their share of sideways compliments.

"From where I sit I think she's a lucky little kid and we're going to do everything possible to get you back in time for Christmas." He grinned.

"Stick to espionage, Coulson." May almost smiled. "You're much better at those lies."

The man shrugged offering a crooked smile. "No lies, May. Your father's got this. I'm pretty sure he promised and with any luck this mission will be in and out. But," he paused and took a breath. "I do promise as soon as we set down you can use one of our throw-aways to make sure all's well on the home front."

With that Coulson slid back into his seat and reattached his harness. He leaned back folding his hands over his middle and closing his eyes. May stared.

"That's it?"

"I keep my promises too, May." He replied without opening his eyes or moving. "Get some sleep," he more than suggested. "You'll need it."

For a moment May considered arguing but in that moment realized she felt somewhat better, despite Coulson's lopsided pep talk. She sat back into her seat, hooked the harness and closed her eyes. She wouldn't sleep, but the memories and thoughts of her little girl would keep her company throughout the flight.

xx

Mrs. Gibbons answered her phone and immediately understood William May's situation. She hung up and rang May's doorbell a few minutes later. An hour later Skye was bathed into fresh pajamas. The retired nurse took her temperature and was impressed that William's special tea had, in fact, done its job.

"Perfectly normal," she announced, patting the little girl's back gently.

"May puts cold artica on the hurty spots from all the shots." Skye breathed.

"Artica?" Mrs. Gibbons repeated.

"Right there," Skye pointed to the small jar on the nightstand.

Mrs. Gibbons pick up the object, read the label and nodded her understanding. When she finished and the little girl settled into her pillow the woman smiled. "Feeling better?"

Skye nodded slowly, then shook her head. "What if she don't come back?"

William had told Mrs. Gibbons as much as he could about May's need to leave so abruptly. "I don't think you need to worry about that, darling." She grinned as she tucked the blanket up to the little girl's chin. "You're momma will be back before you know it."

"I kin know when it's a week. It's a long time, Miss Gibbons." Skye wiggled her arms out of the overs and folded her hands on top of the blanket. "What if the case lady finds out and says I can't stay here no more?"

The older woman smiled and brushed the hair from the little girl's face. "Oh, sweetheart, the caseworker is not going to take you away. She knows this is a very good place for you."

Skye shook her head. "Case ladies don't care about that stuff. If May ain't here ta stop her, she kin just take me."

"Well she will have to get past me and your grandpa in order to do that." The woman smiled again.

"He's my Yeye." Skye corrected and cocked her head to one side. "You and him are kinda old, Miss Gibbons and case ladies don't hafta listen to nobuddy. They just take kids even when they like the foster places."

Mrs. Gibbons nodded. "I see, well I just happen to know a few people that those case ladies do have to listen to all the time." She patted the little girl's hands softly.

Skye's eyebrows shot up. "Fer real?"

The woman nodded slowly as she placed Skye's panda in her arms and once again tucked the blankets around her then turned at the soft sound in the hallway. She leaned forward and kissed the little girl's forehead. "I think someone is waiting to say goodnight." She whispered softly. "So, I will say goodnight myself and see you in the morning."

The woman rose and stepped aside as William approached. "She's all yours grandpa." She patted his shoulder as she started to leave then stopped. "Oh, I am so sorry…Yeye."

William smiled then sat next to Skye. "I see you are well ready for sleep and I am glad Mrs. Gibbons could help."

Skye nodded, "me too." She thought for a moment then added. "Yer a good Yeye but sometimes I need a lady ta help me do stuff. I never had a Yéyé help with that stuff ever."

William smiled. "I understand this need, sunnu. I will be here if I am needed."

"Thank you, Yeye." Skye nodded then fell silent drawing a shaky breath.

"Perhaps it is time for small girls to sleep." William suggested, smoothing out the blankets.

"Is May thinkin' about me? Does she miss me too?" The little girl's shaky voice gave away her uncertainty as a lone tear rolled over her cheek.

William pulled her into his arms. "I know my Mellie, qīn'ài de sūnnǚ. She has thought of nothing but you since she left our home."

"Just like me?" Skye sniffled.

"Exactly like you. That is what mothers and daughters do." William assured her as he laid her back against the pillow. "I am sure Mellie is sleeping right now and she would want you to do the same."

Skye hugged her panda closer. "But I miss her too much that my heart hurts." She sniffled as she rolled to her side and curled into a ball.

"I know it is difficult, sunnu, but we will be strong. Sleep now." The grandfather smoothed Skye's hair away from her face and kissed her temple. As he sat back he began humming a song he had not thought about in many years.

The little girl drifted into a restless sleep.