"Can I get a kiss for good luck?" Fred asked the morning of their match against Slytherin.
"What?" I replied, feeling as my insides turned icy cold.
My memory flashed back to Cedric asking for a kiss before he competed in the third task. Instantly, I felt clammy thinking that Fred was asking me something eerily similar. And coming to think about it, hadn't someone tried to kill Harry during his first year during a quidditch game? And then there was the time Harry and I both plummeted off the stands in my fifth year because of the dementors. Arguably, quidditch could be fatal so now I wanted to scream at Fred not to play.
"Oi, don't talk about kissing Marnie while we're all trying to keep down our breakfast as it is," Harry barked from the other side of the table.
Harry's interruption acted as a distraction for Fred and the others not to ask why I was suddenly trembling. I was trying to work up the nerve to ask Fred to bench this game but Gryffindor didn't have any reserves and the severe look on Angelina's face reminded me of how much effort she had been putting in to make the team fit.
My thoughts were becoming overwhelming and I couldn't form a reply or even recognise if anyone was talking to me anymore. I was finally brought out of my plummeting spiral when I felt Fred's soft lips brush my cheek. I looked up to see the worry in his eyes but all the other team members were starting to head out to the pitch.
"Come back to me alright?" I blurted out in a panicked voice.
Fred stopped short and stared at me with a more serious expression now that he somewhat realised what I must be thinking.
"I'm not going anywhere Hare. Just breathe," he replied softly.
I felt as he stepped forward and took my hand. He moved it up so that it was pressing against his chest. I could feel his heartbeat beneath his jersey which made me feel both relieved and deeply sad that he was alive in front of me.
"Take a deep breath Hare," Fred said softly and I followed him inhale and exhale with my own breathing.
Fred and I stood there for a several moments before I gently pulled my hand away from his.
"Come on Hare, I'll walk you to the pitch and then you can go find Neville and the others," Fred offered.
I nodded and let him pull me by the hand until we made it to the grounds.
"Di—did I say something?" Fred asked once we were standing near the entrance of the stands where I would go to find the others.
"It's alright. I don't want to compare anything, it just startled me when I realised how many times there's almost been a fatal incident during a quidditch game," I whispered, not wanting to tell Fred that his words echoed Cedric's in my head.
I watched as Fred's lips pursed. "Well, don't lean forward off the stands. You know what don't even stand up. Sit in between Hermione and Neville and I'll do my best to make sure Gryffindor wins it early," Fred finished with a cocky smirk.
"Alright, I'll meet you after," I promised before walking off into the stands.
I easily found the group since they were in our usual spot. And just like Fred suggested I took the seat in between Neville and Hermione and waited for the team to step out onto the field. When I finally saw the Gryffindor team entering the pitch, there seemed to be even more applause than normal.
"That's strange that Slytherin is louder than normal," Hermione said with a frown.
"Are they chanting?' Neville asked suspiciously.
"Oh no," I replied, hearing what they were actually doing.
It seemed the Slytherins had come up with some sort of chant about Ron. I knew Ron was already having trouble performing whenever he lost his nerve, and this surely would make him doubt himself. I only hoped that Fred kept his promise and somehow ended the game early, even though that really depended on Harry. However I didn't get to watch much of it since I heard a grating whisper behind me once both teams kicked off the ground to start the match.
"Seems convenient that you trade in one quidditch player for another," Marcus Flint whispered cunningly.
My shoulders tensed as I felt my previous anxiety and newfound anger rising inside of me.
"Bugger off Flint," I retorted without turning around.
Hermione and Neville hadn't initially heard Flint so they both turned around in surprise when they heard my response to him.
"I've seen you and the weasel holding hands in the hallway. You don't waste anytime do you? I mean the dirt is still fresh on your ex-lover's grave and you've already shacked up with someone else," I could hear the contempt and bating in his voice but I refused to give in.
Hermione on the other hand asserted her prefect manner and retorted furiously.
"You can't speak to Marnie like that!" she refuted angrily.
"I don't listen to stupid mudbloods, you people all make me sick," Flint spat back at her.
This seemed to be the excuse I was looking for. I refused to react to his derogatory quips towards me but insulting Hermione like that pushed my patience past its threshold. As Flint stared at Hermione now with a disgusted look I took his distraction as an opportunity to stand up and grab him by his collar. My wand was pressed into his stomach and I knew we blended in with all the other students standing and cheering. I relished in the fact that I could see the fear in Flint's eyes but his mouth smirked unexpectedly.
"Professor Umbridge! Help me professor!" Flint hollered.
His expression was twisted into a smirk while his voice was veiled to seem like I was the threat here. Instead of waiting to see if the toad woman ever heard his fake cries I bolted out of the stands. I didn't know if Umbridge would take my side or Flint's, especially when Hermione was a prefect who would back me up. But then there was the undeniable fact that the newly appointed High Inquisitor wanted me and Harry booted out of the school.
I ran past all the cheering Gryffindors and jeering Slytherins until I was out on the grounds. I subconsciously decided not to go into the school but instead found the hidden passageway near the greenhouses. I brushed through the foliage, ignoring the scrapes from the thorns and jabbing sticks until I came into the passageway itself. Once I was inside I collapsed onto the ground and buried my head into my lap, covering my face with my hands. I hated that I let Flint get to me, or at least made it look like I cared what he said. Truthfully, I couldn't care less about him, especially since I knew my skills exceeded his so I wouldn't land myself in the hospital wing again if he decided to ambush me. But my thoughts were unbearable as my guilt and anguish rose up with a heightened sense of ferocity.
Since my thoughts were so overwhelming I didn't hear much of the game and had no clue who won. It didn't help that the cheering was boisterous and the Slytherins kept up their own chant. I just kept hearing something about Gryffindor having a king on their team.
It was nearly an hour later when I finally heard a set of footsteps approaching me from behind. I didn't know if he had borrowed the map from Harry or if he just knew me well enough to figure out where I would hide. Instead of hiding in the prefect bathroom like last time which is a spot Cedric would have found me in, this spot was one where only Fred would find me. My thoughts still hadn't subsided but I pulled my head up slowly at the sound of his voice.
"You know I started out really upset that my girlfriend wasn't there after the end of the game, but then I realised it wasn't anything I ever expected of you when we were just friends. Plus, Hermione told me what that git said to you and I almost lost it all over again," Fred said as he sat down beside me.
I remembered last time Fred (and George) found me here after a quidditch game the first time I dreamt about my mother and then received a letter from my father telling me what I had seen happened in real life.
"I—I'm sorry I bailed," I wiped away my tears but it was futile since I couldn't get them to stop.
"Hare, come here," Fred said, choosing to pull me into an embrace instead of trying to comfort me through words.
As soon as I felt his arms enclose me my silent tears turned into sobs. I wasn't deluding myself that Fred's arms were Cedric's since both of them felt so different. Their scents also gave them away and honestly I didn't wish that Fred was Cedric. Missing Cedric wasn't tied to my feelings for Fred, but I also couldn't deny that the reason I was with Fred now was because Cedric was no longer here. I never wanted to break up with Cedric when he was still alive so I have to believe that my relationship with Fred wouldn't have started otherwise.
Fred let me cry into his dirt-stained jersey until I could finally get a hold of myself.
"Fred?" I asked, moving myself from his arms to face him again.
"Hmm?" he replied gently.
"What did you mean when you said, 'lose it all over again?" I remembered exactly what he said when he arrived.
"Well, about that. I didn't really want to say anything until you were feeling better…" Fred paused to scratch the back of his head nervously.
I inhaled sharply, trying to imagine what had Fred so nervous when nothing really ever got to him. Each scenario in my head was worse than the last until I started to feel dizzy from a lack of oxygen.
"Well, George, Harry and I got ourselves kicked off the team," he explained embarrassed.
"What?!" I exhaled loudly.
"Yea, Malfoy was mouthing off after the game. The three of us wanted to put him in his place; knock him down a peg or four. But the old toad lady was all too eager to use it as an excuse to kick us all off the team. That being said I would avoid Angelina for a while—she's fit to be tied at the moment," Fred was caught somewhere between embarrassment and frustration.
I laughed harshly. "That woman won't quit until this school is just her and her obliging Slytherin followers."
"Listen Hare don't go doing anything about it alright. She's already taken it out on the three of us and I'm sure she's just waiting to add you to the list. Plus, Flint is in top shape apparently running his mouth like Malfoy, so just lay low. You're going through enough as it is love," Fred said while gripping my hand and intertwined his fingers with mine.
I remained quiet, not knowing how to respond to this much of Fred's gentler side.
"Oh and one more thing…" Fred looked even more serious now. "Don't ever think you have to hide your grief from me. I know you well enough to know you didn't come here to get away from Flint but instead you didn't want me to see you crying over Cedric. I know I never warmed up to the guy when you were dating him but I'm not some sick git who thinks he won you over because he died. A lot of the time I think I should have waited to ask you but I was selfish."
I felt my eyes widening and lips parting in shock. Even while we were best friends I rarely saw this side of Fred. I thought back to what Hermione said and wondered if Fred had grown up a bit since deciding to ask me out.
"Fred, I didn't agree to date you because I was lonely or wanted a replacement. The truth was I would have turned down absolutely anyone else. Dating you somehow makes even more sense than letting myself grieve alone," I replied truthfully.
Fred embraced me again and I figured that he didn't have anymore sentimental words but his actions spoke for him. Being with Fred was an entirely new experience, leaving me feeling ill prepared for what to expect.
XX
And just as Fred warned, Angelina was unapproachable for an entire week after the match. Even though Harry caught the snitch to secure the win for Gryffindor, losing three players was a tough situation to rectify. Harry was just as prickly as Angelina since quidditch was one thing I knew let him feel completely free from everything else. I wanted to help both of them but knew them well enough to leave it alone for the time being. Surprising however was Fred and George who shook it off and instead delved deeper into their product-making. Me on the other hand was actually trying to keep up with my NEWT studies so I wasn't as involved as I had been in the past. Plus, I figured both twins still felt slightly guilty for getting me drunk last time I tried a product.
"Ugh, it's a nightmare trying to put up the Christmas decorations when Peeves in constantly throwing ink pellets at you," Ron grumbled one day in December as he came over to join Harry who had been sitting with us waiting for him and Hermione to return. "I mean why do the prefects have to decorate anyway?"
Ron huffed again before walking past to go up to the dormitories, presumably to shower off the ink stains on his arms and face.
"Erm—Ron?" I asked before he was out of earshot.
"Yea," Ron turned around with an odd sort of smile on his face.
"If there's still any decorating left, can I join you tomorrow?" I asked.
I noticed that everyone in the group turned to look at me sceptically but no one said anything.
"Sure!" Ron beamed. "Tomorrow we have to decorate the trees so it would be a really big help."
Ron's face turned a slight pink before he caught Fred's eye and then decided to continue up to his dormitory.
"What's that all about? You're busy with all your NEWT homework right?" Fred asked from beside me.
"I helped Cedric decorate last year. I don't know, hearing Ron complain about it actually got me thinking I would like to help out again this year," I replied.
I heard Fred expel a long breath beside me but it was quiet so I might have been the only one to hear it.
"It's good that you're feeling up for something like that. I think it's a good idea," Harry finally said from my other side.
Angelina and the others agreed before they each fell back into their previous task. I looked over at Fred since he still hadn't said anything and realised that he had just shared a look with Harry over my head but erased his expression before I could decipher what it was.
"Just don't let my prat of a brother shuck off all of his responsibilities because you're nice enough to help him out. Maybe tag along with Hermione instead," Fred finally said before he too dropped the subject.
However, the next day Hermione completed her tasks early in the morning before I could ask so I contently went along with Ron. Fred grumbled about it but one look from Harry seemed to stop him from saying anything about it.
"Excited about the DA tonight?" Ron asked to make light conversation as we descended the stairs into the Entrance Hall.
"Yea, everyone's been really improving," I replied.
"Well, I don't know about that Smith git, but everyone else is really coming along!" Ron agreed excitedly after he grimaced over his own mention of Zacharias Smith.
"Oh, and did you hear that Mum invited your family to the Burrow for Christmas?" Ron continued sounding both nervous and excited.
"Yes, Fred told me as soon as he got the letter from your mum. I told Harry about it and he's hoping Sirius might be able to come along as well," I replied hoping for the same thing.
"Er—right. Mum would mention it to Fred as well," Ron said sounding disappointed.
"Is Hermione invited?" I asked, wanting to turn the conversation away from me.
"Yea, she's invited," Ron replied simply.
I frowned, wondering how Ron actually felt about Hermione when Hermione was a little more obvious and open with her emotions. But Ron led me to the boxes of decorations before I could press the issue further. I immediately got started and effortlessly fell into an easy contentment as I carefully hung each ornament onto an empty branch. I used magic so I wouldn't waste time for Ron, but still moved one ornament at a time for careful placement.
"You know Marnie…" Ron exclaimed from beside me and I didn't know when he had actually moved over here.
I looked over and saw he had another blush spreading across his face. I frowned, thinking about how embarrassed Ron always seemed to get whenever he talked to anyone besides Harry and Hermione.
"Er—well I never said sorry about Cedric. He was a pretty okay seeker, even if he wasn't as good as Harry. But, Harry always talks about what a hard time you're having and well—I'm sorry," Ron fumbled over his words but I only smiled in return.
"Thank-you Ron, that's very kind," I replied warmly.
Decorating the tree and now hearing Ron's words of condolence actually made me feel content remembering Cedric instead of the usual misery it stirred up.
"Oi, I told you he would slack off and make you do all the work!" Fred exclaimed as he, George and Lee entered into the Great Hall.
"I—I just came to see how Marnie was getting on!" Ron refuted in frustration.
"Actually, I think we're all done here," I said, noticing Ron's box was empty as I secured the last bulb onto a branch near the top.
"Right—well it looks great Hare," Fred admired and moved to stand closer to me than Ron was standing.
"See you tonight little brother?" George winked at Ron before both twins dragged me away.
"Right—thanks for the help Marnie!" Ron called out but the boys already had me halfway down the Great Hall.
For the rest of the afternoon I spent it seated on a couch in the common room while I poured over Herbology notes and the twins with Lee spitballed new product ideas.
"Hare, your brother already left about fifteen minutes ago so the coast is probably clear," Fred said, pulling my attention from my notes.
"Alright," I assented, allowing myself to forego anymore studying to attend the DA meeting.
Fred grabbed onto my hand before leading me out of the common room towards the Room of Requirement.
"So Hare, is there anything you want for Christmas?" Fred asked rather unexpectedly.
"What, we've never exchanged presents before," I replied, feeling guilty that I hadn't even thought about presents.
"Well yea, but you're my girlfriend now. I would be a poor excuse if I didn't get you something," he smiled back.
"Erm—you don't have to do that. There isn't anything I want anyways," I replied honestly.
I found that my finger automatically folded upwards to touch my dangling fairy charm. The hand that Fred wasn't holding bore the sister bracelet Harry gave me since I never took it off. And abidingly it also meant I wore the fairy charm that Cedric gave me two Christmas's ago.
"Alright, well this is my warning. I'm getting you something so don't be surprised. And in return—" Fred's eyes lit up mischievously. "I want a kiss under the mistletoe."
My eyes widened and I felt myself become embarrassed that Fred was being this forward. I didn't know why since I really did enjoy snogging Fred, but this seemed more intimate since he was deeming it worthy as a Christmas present.
I didn't say anything while Fred continued to smirk and we entered through the hidden doorway. All fluttering thoughts vanished immediately though when we entered and I realised the only other two people in the room were Harry and Cho; snogging under the mistletoe.
Immediately my hands lifted and covered my eyes while Fred only laughed hysterically.
"Oi, feel free to use the room when you're not expecting twenty-five other people to show up for practice," Fred exclaimed cheekily.
"Don't suggest for them to come back alone!" I reprimanded while still keeping my eyes covered.
"Come on Hare, your little brother is behaving himself now," he continued in a voice that told he was thoroughly enjoying the awkward moment.
"Shut it or I won't agree to your Christmas present," I replied, knowing how to respond to finally get Fred to stop.
"Awe Hare come on! Alright, alright I'll behave," Fred conceded with his hands raised in the air.
I had uncovered my eyes when Fred assured me the coast was clear. I also saw now that Harry had dashed over to the new arrivals walking through the door while Cho stayed over to the side. However, I accidentally made eye contact with her and she was now glaring at me, same as before when she liked Cedric. I didn't know if she was upset that I was with Fred or that I had interrupted her with Harry, but both scenarios made me loath her even more. She wasn't the one who fell in love with the boy who got killed and now she was making moves on my brother; it was disturbing.
I huffed and folded my arms, but Fred missed Cho's icy glare and instead grabbed onto my arm and led me to the other side to wait for everyone else to arrive. Fred decidedly deemed himself as my new partner which meant Neville ended up with Luna and Ginny paired with George. Thankfully, the meeting turned into a distraction that made me forget about Harry and Cho and I only hoped that Harry would come to his senses and break up with the siren in disguise.